ASCZ's Horrorshow

"Was that like a homosexual remark?"

- Sheriff Hank Keough

ASCZ's Horrorshow is an online review/showcase of monster movies presented, written and edited by ASCZ Pictures, creator of Bloody Urban. Hosted by Author Avatar Zelda, a Perky Goth with a very strange accent, it usually focuses on So Bad It's Good monster movies that you get the feeling she never has the attention span to watch all the way through. The series started in January 2010 and can be watched here.


 * Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking: "The ship could turn upside down. Or hit an iceberg. Or there could be a demon in the cargo hold. OR YOU COULD GET FOOD POISONING! FOOD POISONING!"
 * You Fail Biology Forever: "See, the razorback doesn't have a nervous system like most animals..."
 * Badass Longcoat
 * Based on a Great Big Lie: Frankenfish
 * Brief Accent Imitation
 * Buffy-Speak: Especially evident in Frankenfish
 * Catch Phrase: "So that's [Movie X], grommets/piggies/diddums/kids."
 * Caustic Critic: Totally averted.
 * Changing Clothes Is a Free Action: When she snaps her fingers.
 * Cowboy Bebop at His Computer: Every so often she gets characters mixed up.
 * Did Not Do the Research: Misrepresentation of cryptozoology has been the subject of many of her rants.
 * Don't Explain the Joke: "DID ANYONE ELSE GET THE IRONY OF THEM FIGHTING A GIANT PIG IN A SLAUGHTERHOUSE? COS THERE'S PIGS HANGING EVERYWHERE, AND IT'S FUNNY..."
 * Oddly-Named Sequel 2: Electric Boogaloo: She suggests a more fitting title for Beyond Loch Ness would be 'Inaccurately Named Plesiosaur Terror: Return of the Revenge.....with a Vengeance.'
 * Genki Girl: Zelda spends a lot of time jumping around like a spaz. In Chupacabra: Dark Seas she spontaneously dances to Caramelldansen, and in Frankenfish she begins her review by hugging things in her room.
 * Goggles Do Nothing: In most of her reviews she has a pair on her head.
 * Looks Like Orlok: The Chupacabra, apparently.
 * MSTing: On the Piranha 3D trailer and an episode of Lost Tapes
 * Non-Indicative Name: Loch Ness Terror, which actually takes place in Canada.
 * Old-Timey Bathing Suit: Zelda does her Chupacabra Dark Seas review while wearing one.
 * "This is what i wear to the beach. Don't judge me."
 * Perky Goth: Perky doesn't quite cover it.
 * Realistic Diction Is Unrealistic: The reviews are for the most part improvised, leading to many awkward pauses, tangential nonsense, stuttering and tons of Buffy-Speak.
 * Running Gag: "Was that like a homosexual remark?"
 * The Lost Tapes MSTing has 'This is your Avon Lady' as well as various references to Resident Evil.
 * The Stoner: Her impersonation of George Barry in the Death Bed review.
 * Shout-Out: Her username to A Fish Called Wanda