Noka



""1. Has the blue-haired person sitting on the stretcher over there always been in guild, 2. Where does he buy his hair dye, and 3. Are those his real eyebrows or does he ignore the safety warning like I do?""

- KT, summing up his first impression of the main character in his own words

Noka is a Web Serial Novel starring the titular protagonist in a setting that seems as though different parts were mixed and matched from other time periods, along with ones that never existed. In a world where pistol-wielding guild members clash with everything from Demons lurking in forests, to Serial Killers prowling the alleyways, all bets are off on what could possibly show up. Enter Noka, a high-spirited young boy in his teens, set on joining a guild in the hopes that he can rush into the world of adventures that lie before him.

Unfortunately, for Noka, most dreams are meant to be shattered. The hammer to his brittle dreams is the Diresoldiers guild (usually shortened to "Dire" in-universe) who are seemingly set on showing him that the world isn't as magical as he thinks it is. Which would be true, if one of the guild captains didn't happen to be an elf. Or if their HQ wasn't located in The Lost Woods. ...Or if he wasn't attacked by a fire-breathing wyvern shortly after starting his journey.

After joining Dire in an unorthodox manner, Noka finds himself adjusting to the guild life through situations such as: involuntarily hunting pandas for target practice, getting lost in storms while out buying groceries, and tracking serial killers with his fellow guildmates for money.

Updated on a daily basis now!

Noka provides examples of:
"Az: "—Yeah he gets the same look when I tell him we’re out of bacon. He gets that sort of shocked look of despair on his face, right?""
 * Attention Deficit Ooh Shiny: KT is immediately distracted by Noka's hair color, to the point where he temporarily forgot to ask why everything was exploding to pieces around him.
 * Awesome McCoolname: The actual names of several Dires.
 * Noka:
 * KT:
 * Found:
 * Aziu:
 * Ex:
 * Ax Crazy: Az tells Noka that Found used to be extremely violent before, compared to how relatively mellow he is now. He also warns Noka that he doesn't want to see the "Old" Found.
 * Bacon Addiction: Az lampshades how much Found loves his bacon:

"Crim: "You bought a rifle that shoots bullets with over 14,000 pounds of force. How did you even find an XM78?!""
 * BFG: The "XM78 Anti-Materiel Rifle", which is soon Lampshaded by resident gun enthusiast, Crim.

"Az: (After being shot through the hand) "I was apologizing before you shot my right god damn hand!"
 * BFS: Found's height and build is emphasized by how he can wear a claymore sized broadsword at the hip and manage to conceal it under a coat.
 * Big Damn Heroes: Dante shows up just in time to save Noka from being beaten to death by Elli.
 * Blood Knight: Found, when in the right mood.
 * Cloudcuckoolander: KT isn't the most grounded guild captain, most of the time.
 * Found qualifies by convincing Abel to "help" him make a fort out of furniture. By breaking down the furniture and building from scratch.
 * Comedic Sociopathy: Early as the third chapter in fact. Noka is stabbed through the shoulder and left bleeding out on the ground. He isn't paid any attention to though since Az crash lands his eagle on top of his assailants. The ensuing scuffle overshadows his critical condition:

Noka: "Still bleeding here...""

"Az: "Son of a-!"
 * Curb Stomp Battle: Every one of Found's fights has ended this way so far. Thankfully he's one of the good guys.
 * Curse Cut Short: Played with. Closer to "Apology Cut Short" as Az is halfway through apologizing until he's shot through the hand. His ensuing reaction however is played straight, however:

Archer: "Now that he can't use his bow, he can't fight back.""

"Az: "I've never seen anyone steal stuff by wearing it and just walking out. That guy's got massive ba—""
 * Played straight when Az watches Abel absentmindedly walk out of a store still wearing the clothes he's trying on:

"Ellidon: "Great, you're just in time. Az is in the kitchen, go help him not burn water and cook something edible. Oh, and remember about the whole not screwing up part. Now go before I kill you. Hahaha!"
 * Daylight Horror: Solo's encounter with  in the Tensian Forest. Of course, it's his first day on patrol too.
 * First Episode Resurrection
 * Good Old Fisticuffs: Found vs Paladins in Solo's flashback.
 * Goofy Print Underwear: Found has bacon print underwear, which he uses as a makeshift flag for a fort made out of furniture.
 * Hair Trigger Temper: Elli nearly kills Noka on two occasions, just for the hell of it.
 * Here There Be Dragons: Averted, unfortunately for Noka. His napkin-map really should have had illustrations on it, especially when the directions on it leads him to a volcanic area where wyverns reside. Though, there was a grocery store ten miles away, but still...
 * Heroic Albino: Az, being an elf, is essentially albino by default. His hair is platinum blonde though, just because it's such a dominant hair color for elves.
 * Highly Visible Ninja: Az and Solo are the only members of the Third Division, the supposed recon specialists of guild. In a nutshell; ninjas with cameras. What do they wear? Az is fond of a bright red long-coat for starters.
 * Insistent Terminology: Raido.
 * It Amused Me: Elli, oh so much. His early appearances are scarce, but he runs with them every time he shows up. Included on his list is choking Noka, scaring Noka half to death through laughter, and beating the daylights out of him for fun.

Noka: "Oh...yeah, haha..."

Ellidon: "I'm not kidding."

Noka: "Sorry!"

Ellidon: "Geez, calm down. It's a joke.""

"Az: "And you didn't look in your closet for a shirt? You went around asking everyone for one, including—oh look, she just sent me a message on the Raido 'why is there a kid with blue hair asking people for their clothes o.o;?'.""
 * Knight of Cerebus: Sebastian showing up is a signal that something horrible is either happening off-screen, just happened, or is about to happen. So far,  Judging from peoples' reactions to him, he seems to fit the bill in-universe as well.
 * Friendless Background: The driving reason Abel wants to join Dire.
 * Killed Mid Sentence: The warrior that stabbed Noka is shot dead by Az, and promptly Dies Wide Open.
 * Mood Whiplash: Chapters aren't exempt from ping-ponging between ludicrous stupid-but-funny scenes, and serious situations where silence permeates the background.
 * Multishot: Az takes the second kill of the story with a five arrow volley in one shot.
 * One Handed Zweihander: Found.
 * Perpetual Poverty: Once again, the guild. May have to do with the voracious appetites possessed by its members. Either that or just the amount of bacon consumed by Found is enough to offset the already frail bank account.
 * Purely Aesthetic Era: Full medieval body armor? Check. Flying fire-breathing wyverns? Check. Pistols, Cellphones, and TVs? Check, Check, and Check!
 * Ragtag Bunch of Misfits: Applies to the entire guild in general, but seeing Az, an albino elf dressed in a long coat, and Found, a very tall, very intimidating looking redheaded human, cracking sarcastic jokes together showcases it well. They don't hesitate to accept Noka, a random boy with blue hair initially dressed in armor, as one of their own.
 * Red Eyes Take Warning: Wyverns' eyes shine red when exposed to sunlight.
 * Shirtless Scene: Noka wakes up in his room wearing only pants. Justified in that he was badly wounded and wearing restricting armor when he was brought in, and needed it to be removed for surgery. He spends the next few minutes going door-to-door asking guildies for a spare t-shirt to wear. Subverted in that almost every person he came across gave him blank stares when he asked for their clothes.

Along with Elli's initial reaction: "Elli: "Alright then...wouldn't have been surprised if it was Found's room 'cause it's Found, but...I'm just gonna take this TV away then...yeah...""


 * Sliding Scale of Silliness Versus Seriousness: Can and will jump the line between the two, and often.
 * Super Reflexes: Az takes an arrow to the hand when his guard is down, but he'll effortlessly catch them if he's focused.
 * Sword and Gun: One of Found's fighting styles. Averted during the Serial Killer Arc in that the trench coat he wears doesn't have enough space to carry both weapons at the same time, forcing him to choose between his broadsword or his pistol. He opts for the pistol.
 * He demonstrates in Solo's flashback.
 * The Lost Woods: The general location of the Dire HQ. It doesn't help that it is a hotspot for numerous gates.
 * Throwing Your Sword Always Works: Discussed by Found and Az.
 * True Companions: The Guild. Found threatens to bring Abel back to life and kill him if he ever commits suicide. It's just Found's way of showing love. Love through irrational thought processes.
 * Unusually Uninteresting Sight: Presumably because the residents of the universe are desensitized to such high amounts of weirdness, or all the sane people died from insanity long ago.
 * Vitriolic Best Buds: Az and Found can bicker with each other until the end of time over the most pointless things. At the same time, they're both captains, they're both close friends, and in actual serious situations they can
 * You Gotta Have Blue Hair: Usually the first thing most people notice about Noka.