Aivoton Aikamatka

Aivoton Aikamatka https://web.archive.org/web/20181120222901/http://aivotonaikamatka.blogspot.com/ is a Finnish web novel written by web author Rupert F. The first seven parts of the series were originally released on Deviant ART in 2009, but in August 2011 the series was started again in Blogger.

The story in a nutshell: 12 year old Mike Thurson is one fateful night kidnapped by ferocious Space Pirates for unknown reasons and taken to the 2500's. There (or then?) he and the privateers quickly get tangled into a mess concerning a valuable artifact. Hilarity Ensues.

"Mike: "Mandarin, eh?" Jin Fu: "No, that's a monkey. Don't they teach this kind of stuff to you at schools in the 1900's?""
 * Amusing Injuries: Everywhere. Jin Fu and Max seem to be the most prominent Chew Toys.
 * Applied Phlebotinum: Pimeyden Ydin ("The Heart of Darkness"), a mysterious stone with some kind of powers that are described as 'sort of Radioactive'.
 * Bizarrchitecture: The World Main Office Building. Instead of renovating old space they build new floors and rooms on top the whole thing. This has led to the Office becoming a Star Scraper.
 * Black Cloak: Axel. Not that it helps him concealing his identity.
 * Cain and Abel: Sam and Axel.
 * Coat, Hat, Mask: Doctor Ego wears a wizard hat, long purple coat and bandages to conceal his face. Does this make him any less conspicuous, well...
 * Comically Missing the Point: Jin Fu, after Mike hears him calling the pet monkey using mandarin chinese:

""Here's form 26855B. Stamps required here, here and here. Appropriate stamps can be acquired from floors 8, 17 and 23. By the way, the elevator's out of order.""
 * Cool Ship / Cool Airship: Rautamöykky ("The Iron Lump") is a flying galleon with plane wings.
 * Early-Bird Cameo: Dr. Ego appeared in deviantArt Christmas Special meme a good year before his actual introduction in-story.
 * Eyepatch of Power: Sam, who lost in a duel and apparently popped an eye out of his head out of pure shame.
 * Fish Out of Temporal Water: Mike.
 * Full-Name Basis: Jin Fu.
 * Fun with Acronyms: Doctor Ego, though his nickname comes from his initials ('Ellsworth Gregory Owen').
 * Heavy Sleeper: Max. He has tried to get medication for that, but reading all those informative labels is so tiring...
 * Hitman with a Heart: Jade Lockhart, a mercenary hired to kill Sam, who also happens to be his ex-girlfriend.
 * Last-Name Basis: Hooks. Supplemental material on Deviant ART states his first name is Roland.
 * Meaningful Name: Hooks. He has a Hook Hand as a part of a family in-joke.
 * Mood Swinger: Axel. He goes from polite gentleman to violent raging lunatic and back in matter of seconds.
 * Mouthy Kid: Mike. He just doesn't know when to shut up.
 * Mr. Exposition: Hooks mainly takes this role when explaining wonders of 2500 to Mike. This is lampshaded by Sam at one point.
 * No New Fashions in the Future: Sam wears stereotypical pirate apparel, Jin Fu sports a men's kimono, and Hooks's attire resembles a cowboy.
 * Obstructive Bureaucrat: The woman at the World Main Office.


 * Oh Crap: See Who Is Driving??
 * Also one from the whole crew when they discover that
 * Pun-Based Title: The name Aivoton Aikamatka is a play on finnish name of R. L. Stine's Tick Tock, You're Dead!
 * Sadist Teacher: All Mike's teachers have shades of this, but the biology teacher Mr. Oldman is the worst offender.
 * Schedule Slip: Part VII was released in April 2009. In 2011, the series got a Updated Rerelease and is now back and running again.
 * Schizo-Tech: Sam's weapon is half-rifle, half-sword. Which both are outdated from their point of view. Also, see Cool Airship.
 * Shout-Out: The class bully is named Jim Hopkins as a shout out to Bully.
 * Also, In 2500's the preferred term for 'time machine' is 'Chrono Trigger'.
 * The virtual currency in 2500's is called 'pyra'.
 * Planet Aquatos is mentioned.
 * At one point, Jade is arguing with her mother on the phone about how she's an assassin, not a crazed gunman.
 * Star Scraper: See Bizarrchitecture above.
 * Stillborn Serial: Section C, the prequel webcomic, which lasted for 5 pages.
 * The Watson: Mike. His character file specifically says that his purpose in the story is to ask all the questions that audience would ask.
 * Wise Beyond Their Years: Mike. The kid's 12 and he knows about Newton's apocalyptic scenarios and is able to recognize Mandarin Chinese when spoken.
 * Who Is Driving?: When Max joins others for breakfast. Quickly followed by Oh Crap moment.