Distorted View

Distorted View Daily is a Podcast which is run by Timothy James Henson. It has both a free and a paid iteration (the paid version gets episodes on the weekends and videocasts, as well as access to all of the episodes going back to the very beginning, the free version only gets the Monday - Friday casts).

And now for the vulgar part.

The show details some of the craziest, most dream-wrecking news to have ever been news. Often times this is played for laughs. Most often, the stories that Henson reads take place in Florida.

There are numerous segments on the show, some of which have ceased. By far, the most popular is "Sextastic Tuesday", wherein Tim reads a less than stellar pornographic fiction, again, just for laughs.

The show started in 1996 when Tim's website went live, he began audio streaming in 1997. Now, the show has thousands of listeners, whom Tim lovingly refers to as "Freakie-Deakies" or just "Freaks". The show has become so successful that Tim has made it his job, which actually pays his bills.

It can be found here. God help you.


 * The All-Solving Hammer: But instead of a normal hammer, it was the song "Sledgehammer" by Peter Gabriel
 * Ass Shove: "Do do do, it's Anal Thursday!"
 * Catch Phrase: "YES!" Said at the beginning of every episode after the theme tune plays.
 * Crosses the Line Twice: Only EVERY episode
 * Crowning Moment of Funny: In one "Sextastic Tuesday" segment, there was a story about a women who had relations with a dolphin. Tim added weight to that by making the most jarringly realistic dolphin sounds in between reading the woman's lines.
 * A GODDAMN TRAIN
 * Pretty much every Sextastic Tuesday, usually combined with a heaping helping of Squick
 * Crowning Music of Awesome: If you hear the words "Here's a new song from Cory." Be prepared for some of the greatest song parodies EVER. Or some of the most disgusting ones.
 * Dead Baby Comedy: Sometimes Tim takes this trope a bit literally, particularly with the "Abortion Song", which has an aborted baby asking his mother why she killed him. This was followed up later in the same episode it premiered in with an ad for Fetus Sandwiches.
 * Dude, Not Funny: Tim had played a very disturbing audio clip of a bunny being crushed to death, because he thought the bunny's screams were fascinating. Months later, people were still complaining of/making fun of/playing the audio.
 * Fantastic Racism: There used to be a segment called "Black Friday", where Tim would play a trailer for a Blaxploitation film, and then make fun of it.
 * Failed a Spot Check: The aforementioned GODDAMNED TRAIN.
 * Go-Karting with Bowser: There are some times that God and Satan are in the same room, very infrequently does it end badly for either party. There even used to be a segment called "Ask Satan" where the Prince of Darkness would answer your mails
 * It Is Pronounced "Tro-PAY": Mayonnaise. It is pronounced "Meow-nus".
 * Not So Different: "Black and White". It showed that no matter what the color of your skin is, you are still stupid.
 * Only in Florida: FLORIDA Our most fucked up state!
 * Running Gag: "Hi, and welcome to 1-800-WET SHIT'" Used any time there is ANY reference to eating feces, which is distressingly often.
 * "My digget hoawd" was used for several days in a row at the beginning of the show when Tim would update you on how many days he has had an erection without losing it.
 * "It's just a fun thing" was used in the show many times after Tim discovered it can be used to justify any from of Squick.
 * After an interview he had with a gay prostitute listener, Tim started replaying the words "Cristal Meth loosens up your butt ho'." many times on the show, even long after the interview was over.
 * After a clip from played on the show from a youTube video, people began to wonder what Harpo Jarvi is. Some theorize that it's the fish pillow, some say it's a shower stool, some suspect that it's some form of indigestion.
 * The term "Jigoo!" has become a greeting after it was uttered in a particular video.