The Jerry Seinfeld Program

""Hi! We're Jerry Seinfeld and George Costanza and we're the stars of NBC's hit show, Seinfeld. We've been on the air for 21 years, and, well, coming up with ideas and writing the show is hard. That's all. Enjoy our new episodes!""

- "Jerry Seinfeld" and "George Costanza"

""Dat's it Jerry.... I'm DONE WITH BEANS!""

- "George Costanza", "Beans"

The Jerry Seinfeld Program is a 2010 webseries which has resurrected the classic sitcom as a series of minute-or-so long episodes, updated every couple days. If you thought the TV show was about nothing, you truly haven't seen "nothing" yet.

"George: I love you now and forever Jerry! I wanna tell the whole world!
 * Actor Allusion - In one short, "Jerry" completely breaks character and claims to be Dan Klein, the actor playing him, for the rest of the episode.
 * Adaptation Decay - Intentional
 * Affectionate Parody
 * Arc Words - "Well now that's.... usin' your bean!"
 * Black Comedy - Increasingly so towards the end of the series.
 * Brief Accent Imitation - "Jerry" has inexplicably slipped into German and South African accents for a few words in certain episodes.
 * Cerebus Syndrome - Intentional.
 * Chroma Key - How the series appears to be set in the real apartment from Seinfeld.
 * Chuck Cunningham Syndrome - Seemingly everybody in the Seinfeld universe except for "Jerry" and "George", most glaringly Elaine and Kramer. Lampshaded twice.
 * Cloudcuckoolander - "Jerry Seinfeld"
 * Creator Backlash - It would almost seem like "Jerry" and "George" hate the show, and want it canceled. Nah.
 * Darker and Edgier
 * Easy Evangelism - In episode 2, God.
 * Franchise Zombie - Tends to happen somewhere down the line once your sitcom loses half its cast and outlasts Gunsmoke.
 * The Ghost - Kramer and Elaine. In fact, in their only mention to date, "Jerry" claims to not even know who they are.
 * A viewer asks what happened to them in the first fan-mail episode, but "Jerry" claims he doesn't know.
 * Heterosexual Life Partners - Just barely heterosexual life partners. The "Penis Size" episode certainly crosses the line.
 * Ho Yay - Played hard in "Penis Size" where the conversation drifts from "Jerry" pointing out that the two have are very close friends, to the two acknowledging that they love eachother to wanting to see and measure eachother's penises.

Jerry: You sayin that you want to make it public?

George: I do!

Jerry: First we gotta make it (points at downward) private."

"Jerry (reading Carol's letter): Dear Seinfeld, you guys suck. What the hell are you doing to this show? It should have been cancelled 10 years ago! Now its just you and George standing there talking about the dumbest shit. Have you noticed there hasn't been a single joke on the show? You're sad and disgusting!"
 * Long Runner: Seinfeld, which has been running for the past 21 years.
 * Minimalist Cast- You can count the number of characters that appear who aren't "Jerry" or "George" on one finger.
 * Mood Dissonance
 * No Fourth Wall - The last line of almost every episode is addressed to the viewers at home. In certain episodes, a joke bombs and "Jerry" yells at the studio audience in response.
 * Obligatory Swearing - Here and there, out of nowhere.
 * Online Spin Off
 * Overly Long Gag - Many, like "Clapping".
 * The Reason You Suck Letter - See Seasonal Rot below.
 * Refuge in Vulgarity - Parodied in "Whores".
 * Seasonal Rot - Or so Carol Page claims in the first mail bag episode.
 * Seasonal Rot - Or so Carol Page claims in the first mail bag episode.

"Jerry: Chacabi! Chic..a-bi! Chic-a-bi! Chic...a-boo!
 * Screwed By the Network - Once a hit show and the pride of the network Seinfeld now survives as a series of poorly made web shorts with half of its original cast missing. Confusingly they've also renewed the show through a 26th season.
 * So Unfunny It's Funny - Just one example is Jerry's comedy act falling apart and the laugh track disappearing in "I Love You".
 * Talkative Loon: Jerry in "Chacabi".

George: What are you talking about?

Jerry: I don't know...(pointing at audience) do you?"


 * X Meets Y - Seinfeld meets Stella.