Serious Business/Real Life/Sports

""Winning isn't everything; it's the only thing." - UCLA Bruins football coach Red Sanders"
 * Pick pretty much any professional sport. People make a living from, and others dedicatedly and sometimes over-enthusiastically follow people, playing games. Given how some people make a living from this, it may be justified.
 * It's to the point that professional athletes are put on a pedestal all year long, even regarding their personal lives: sports media will freak out about the slightest off-season incident even if it can be resolved without interfering with the player's ability to work, and the NFL has gone as far as institute a "Player Conduct Policy" with which the commissioner can punish players over matters not having anything to do with the league. Serious business, indeed.
 * The Personal Conduct Policy was put into play when players started getting shot and killed (or doing the shooting themselves) outside of strip clubs. Something had to change.
 * What one show consistently gets the highest TV ratings in the United States, driving prices for commercial timeslots during its broadcast up to over a million dollars a minute? The Super Bowl.
 * The Rock-Paper-Scissors World Championship in Las Vegas. Oh, the humanity!
 * Well...
 * Pick a movie about sports. Any movie about sports.
 * Australian Cricket legend and World War Two fighter pilot Keith Miller put things into perspective when he was asked how he handled the pressure of international cricket. His reply: "Pressure? A Messerschmitt up your arse is pressure. Playing cricket is not."
 * Legendary football manager Bill Shankly (link for baffled non-Brits) gave the page quote ina 1981 interview. It's also repeated as, "Someone said 'Football is a matter of life and death to you,' and I said 'Listen, it's more important than that'."
 * Wait, doesn't this attitude also apply to golf?
 * In Brazil, there's the phrase "o futebol é como uma religião", "soccer is like a religion", which perfectly describes how passionate are Brazilians (and Latin Americans overall) about soccer.
 * When Brazil lost the final of the 1950 World Cup, two fans in the stadium committed suicide by throwing themselves off a stand.
 * A particularly tragic case of soccer being taken far too seriously in that part of the world; Andres Escobar, a Colombian national team player who was murdered following an accidental own-goal which saw Colombia kicked out of the 1994 World Cup. It's generally agreed that his death was a result of the match; some argue, however, that it wasn't just the work of a particularly ticked-off fan, but committed on the orders of drug dealers who lost out big on bets made on the game. Either way, it's a pretty harsh example of this trope.
 * In Central America, the Soccer War of 1969 claimed thousands of lives. There was a great deal more at stake than soccer, though.
 * Hailing from Italy, this author can testify that most Italian males, and an unexpectedly high percentage of females, are absolutely batshit crazy about soccer. This author has an otherwise extremely smart friend who inexplicably cries himself to sleep whenever his team loses (this does not happen rarely). The Italian situation is so big that soccer influences politics, and vice versa. And yeah, soccer-craziness-caused deaths do occur.
 * This was actually mentioned in a Jack-In-The-Box commercial.
 * Prime Minister of Italy = President of Milan AC, one of the most important clubs of the country, and of the world. Just FYI.
 * Here is a video of an AC Milan fan sitting in the Inter Milan fan section, which sparks a fistfight that gets his jersey torn off. Not all that notable. Except this happened between Chinese fans, at an exhibition game, in Beijing.
 * Egyptian soccer fans are equally guilty of this trope. Case in point: In 2012, Al-Masry scored a 3-1 victory against top team Al-Alhy. Cue deadly riots by frenzied fans... and the population's disappointment at the police's supposed incompetence at handling the mad football fanatics quckly led to more riots, not over football, but over the assumed failure of the security forces. Easily one of the harshest examples of both this trope and the snowball effect.
 * The earliest known reference to a game called "football" is a decree by the Mayor of London banning it for being a source of violence... in 1314. No wonder the Football Hooligans are such a popular trope.
 * Recreational soccer is a huge deal in affluent suburbs -- usually more to hyperactive parents than the actual kids playing. (This has been flanderized in media via "Soccer Moms" and bad Will Ferrell movies, but not by much.) Little League baseball is pretty much the same.
 * Melbourne Cup Day, a holiday in Australia celebrating a horse race. It's only a public holiday in Victoria, but the rest of Australia pretty much shuts down while the actual race is running.
 * It's called "The Race That Stops a Nation" for a reason. But as it's held on a Tuesday and public holidays are Serious Business in Australia, most people try to skip Monday too.
 * Australians as a nation are, for the most part, utterly mad about almost all forms of sports (but especially the ones they're really good at, such as cricket and Australian Rules Football). Here's a fun exercise; watch any Australian commercial TV news broadcast and make note of how many of the stories relate to sport in some way. Bet it's over half. Of course, if you happen to live in Australia and aren't particularly interested in sport, it makes an otherwise wonderful country somewhat less wonderful to live in. It doesn't help that when they lose something that they normally win (as happened a couple of years ago, when England unexpectedly won the Ashes (a Cricket Test Series), or with recent grumblings about their winning less gold medals at the Beijing Olympics than expected), they can be pretty bad losers.
 * Although strangely, unlike other places in the world with strong team loyalties, it's possible to wear shirts with slogans like "I support two teams: Collingwood and whoever is playing Brisbane" without being shanked. Try wearing a shirt saying "I support two teams: Manchester United and whoever is playing Liverpool" and see how long you last anywhere where the English Premier League is followed.
 * Yeah, why would you want to support Manchester United?
 * Or Collingwood?
 * Red Sox Nation
 * Specifically, the Red Sox v. Yankees rivalry. You do not want to wear even the smallest, most trivial item of Sox paraphernalia in Yankee Stadium during a game between those two (and vice-versa).
 * Martha Coakley found out the hard way just what Serious Business this was, when it cost her a US Senate seat... to a Republican... costing the Democrats supermajority.
 * There's a bit more to it than that - putting aside actual issues, electoral trends, and such, Coakley proved to be rather adverse to actually campaigning for the election, which her opponent was quite comfortable doing. This trope tends to get play about one of her famous quotes regarding her loss - "What, did they expect me to shake hands outside of Fenway Park in the cold?" While the quote is more about her aversion to meeting with voters, the venue choice leads some to think that her disdain for the Red Sox caused her defeat. Compare with Massachusetts' other senator, John Kerry - while he has proven to be less than knowledgeable about the team itself, he does claim to be a fan, and usually gets a pass on his lack of knowledge.
 * "Titletown, USA" is written into the official political seal of the city of Green Bay, Wisconsin.
 * They got the Green Bay Packers logo in their seal.
 * Other sports teams where it didn't get quite so ridiculous:
 * Raider Nation.
 * RIDER Nation.
 * Raider Nation was the first with the Nation name, though, circa sometime in the 1970s, definitely by the beginning of the '80s.
 * Even better: Steeler Nation. (Which was given its name in 1975, as the Other Wiki documents. You may note that's before "the beginning of the '80s.)
 * The Dallas Cowboys are were called "America's Team".
 * Cardinal Nation, but not about baseball itself. They take fan behavior pretty seriously--fans acting like jackasses get yelled at and piss everyone off. Only one player has ever been booed (Jason Isringhausen, a relief pitcher). Cardinal fans take pride in their classy attitude and good reputation.
 * The Serious Business of sports was mused upon in a Sunday(?) comic of Frazz, wherein Frazz and his cycling partner concluded that the unimportance of sports made them the most important thing there is.
 * Hockey. People who think Canadians are always polite and well-behaved have clearly never been in Vancouver during a Canucks game.
 * ...Or seen them burn squad cars over the results of a Montréal Canadiens game.
 * While this is still speculation, it was believed that those who burned squad cars had little interest in the game and merely took advantage of the Canadiens' victory, however given how fans react in Montreal who knows...
 * ...Or been on Whyte Avenue during the Edmonton Oilers' Stanley Cup run in 2006.
 * ...Or spent a week in Calgary during hockey season. Hockey isn't a sport: it's a cult.
 * In 1994 the Canucks lost Game 7 of the Stanley Cup Finals to the New York Rangers. Cue riot.
 * It got repeated when the Canucks lost Game 7 of the Stanley Cup Finals in 2011 to the Boston Bruins.
 * Oh, 1955. Maurice "The Rocket" Richard gets suspended for the rest of the season and the playoffs for hitting an official. Cue the riot at the next Canadiens home game.
 * Incidentally, he received a 16 minute standing ovation in 1996, and when he died in 2000 he received a state funeral broadcast across the country, with the Governor-General and prime minister attending. In Quebec, Richard was truly Serious Business.
 * Even more food for thought, this riot cost the city of Montreal an estimated five hundred thousand dollars. One wonders how the city has survived this long.
 * Or the hatred of the "Leafs Nation" by everyone else in the country.
 * I fear what will happen if the Leafs win another Stanley Cup.
 * The smash hit movie Bon Cop, Bad Cop was about a serial killer who murdered people he thought were killing hockey in Canada by trading the best players to the States. Like all good satire, it succeeds by sailing very close to the wind.
 * On the other side of the border, there are a few places where hockey is every bit as big a deal. The entire metropolitan Detroit area turns red and white from October to May, and you WILL be shot if you admit that you support another team.
 * On the other end of the coin, God help you if you wear a Red Wings jersey in Denver.
 * Meh. Maybe ten years ago, but these days? Other than their minority-faithful, the Avalanche haven't been relevant on the mainstream Denver scene in quite some time, especially since it's such a melting pot that if anyone freaked out about any specific jersey, it would end up becoming a daily thing no matter where they were.
 * Ottawa city council once passed a resolution banning anyone from wearing a Leafs jersey to attend a playoff game, unless said Leaf-jersey wearing fans ponied up a canned donation for the Food Bank.
 * This.
 * You should have seen some reactions when United States tied the men's hockey game. Then when Canada won, this was the reaction.
 * In Spring of 2011 there was yet another election in Canada caused by the Liberals and other non-ruling parties triggering it. Said Election promptly took a back seat due to the fact that both Canucks and Canadiens were in the Stanley Cup Playoffs. Yes, our hockey is more important than our Politics. And nastier too.
 * A political debate between all four party leaders were rescheduled because of hockey. I kid you not
 * Older Than Print: Chariot Racing in the Roman, and later, the Byzantine Empire. The hatred between the Reds, the Whites, the Greens, and the Blues was both comparable to modern day events like soccer riots. But then, in 532 AD Constantinople, an incident involving a botched execution of Blue and Green leaders for the murder of a citizen resulted in the two factions unifying and attempting, and almost succeeding, in overthrowing the Byzantine Empire itself. The Nika Riots were so bad that Justinian I attempted to flee the capitol, but his wife Theodora (a High Queen who was born a low-class woman) stopped him at the last minute. The riots only stopped when his clever eunuch resident hawk, Flavius Belisarius no less, was called back from retirement, along with two generals and several army divisions, lured the rioters into the Hippodrome, convinced the Blues to walk out, and killed thirty thousand people.
 * Bengals wide receiver Chad Johnson (or at least he was Chad Johnson) recently legally changed his last name to "Ocho Cinco," his nickname, just so he could put it on the back of his jersey.
 * This despite that "ocho cinco" means "eight five"; "ochenta y cinco" is eighty-five.
 * Actually, his giant ego made the Bengals consider trading him. If traded, he would no longer be number 85, so his nickname would be meaningless, and he'd invested a lot into assocating his image with that nickname. As of the 2011-2012 season, Chad "Ochocinco" Johnson no longer plays for the Bengals.
 * Well, most teams (at least, in North American professional leagues; not sure about other countries) do have conditions where they will swap numbers if the two players agree to it. This agreement usually involves one player paying another for the uniform number. On a related note, uniform numbers are such Serious Business that players will pay thousands of dollars or buy cars for other players to get their desired number.
 * It should be pointed out that under American Football rules, jersey numbers for Offensive players must lie within certain very narrow specified ranges, depending on what position the wearer plays -- backs must be numbered 1 through 49, the Center must be 50-59, the Guards must be 60-69, the Tackles must be 70-79, and ends must be 80-99. Thus, within each numerical range, the available pool of numbers is much more limited than it is in a free-for-all-numbering game like baseball. Famous baseball uniform numbers are retired from time to time, but football jersey numbers are almost never retired.
 * American football, particularly college ball, is a religion in many, many parts of the United States. The greatest rivalry in all of sports, according to ESPN, is that between the Ohio State University and the University of Michigan. Other college blood feuds include Alabama/Auburn, Florida/Florida State, North Carolina/Duke, Oklahoma/Texas, Georgia/Georgia Tech, Notre Dame/USC, and Army/Navy.
 * The mania is even more intense for Ohio State fans than Michigan fans. I wouldn't be too concerned wearing OSU garb in Ann Arbor, Michigan, but I would never dare to wear blue and maize on the streets of Columbus, Ohio... just thinking about it is scary.
 * At least Ohio State and Michigan have a little bit of geographical separation between their fan bases. What was that about burning the score of the latest Auburn-Alabama game in your neighbor's lawn? (Wait, that's Alabama-Auburn now. I'm so used to Auburn being the stronger one that I just naturally said it that way. I, personally, have no affiliation in that or any other one, as my part of the country is the one generally thought of as the doormats of the BCS. We are also the ones taking over your brackets.)
 * During one of the recent matchups, the city of Ann Arbor sent their own police officers along to protect their fans in Columbus. Legendary coach Woody Hayes reportedly went on a recruiting trip to Michigan with an assistant coach, who noted that they were about to run out of fuel. Woody was adamant that they would NOT fill up in Michigan or spend a dime there, and they literally had to coast across the state border, barely making it to the first gas station on the other side.
 * Mocked in ESPN commercials. One showed a man in OSU gear passionately making out with a woman in Michigan clothes. The caption was "If it wasn't for sports, this wouldn't be disgusting."
 * This article says it all. Big Ten football really is a life-or-death situation.
 * In Texas, we say football is the state religion. We're only half joking.
 * Then there's the old saw, "There are two sports in Texas: football, and spring football."
 * The Fight Song for Texas A&M calls out and mocks the University of Texas by name.
 * Officially, Texas A&M's Fight Song is referred to as the War Hymn. Serious Business, indeed.
 * And Texas' fight song calls out A&M, even though their main rivalry is with Oklahoma.
 * On the subject of Oklahoma, their fans are loyal to their last breath as well. Note that the first comment on this article is "Somebody alert 4chan."
 * There was a great line written about a Texas coach: "He hates using war metaphors for football, because to him, there has never been a war fought with the intensity that he expects from his defense."
 * In 1997, Tom Osborne retired from the position of head coach of the University of Nebraska-Lincoln (The Cornhuskers) football team. That single story took over the entire front page of most newspapers in Nebraska, plus large chunks of the rest of the news sections, plus a good chunk of the sports sections. OK, the guy had been head coach for 25 years, but come on people, priorities?
 * And then he became a state senator. At one point a lot of people were hoping he'd run for governor as well. Subsequent head coaches have been basically summarily fired for not quite measuring up. In Nebraska, Tom Osborne is approximately on a level with Jesus in terms of general popularity.
 * High school basketball in Indiana, at least back in the day. Showcased well in the movie Hoosiers where the entire town came out to all the basketball games and followed the team everywhere they went. This was very much Truth in Television back when there wasn't much to do around a small town.
 * Since the introduction of class basketball to the state in 1997, well over half the former obsession is gone. That's communism for you. Down in Kentucky, where universal equality to all high schools still reigns, the obsessiveness remains as strong as ever.
 * Indiana? Kentucky? F--- them! How about Illinois? We're the ones who coined the term "March Madness" to describe the state high school basketball tournament!
 * Illinois never burned and hung a kid in effigy for getting a head coach of the local college team fired, like here in Bloomington, Indiana.
 * Another college sport example, the Oxford/Cambridge Boat Race. No cash prize, few of the participants go on to row professionally, and it's not even a championship (no one claims the two university crews are necessarily the best in the country, though they do train extremely hard). Still very Serious Business, and with a huge TV audience in the UK.
 * Kite flying in Pakistan; where competition has led to kite-fliers impregnating their kite-strings with glass in order to cut opposing kite-strings and attack rival kites. This has resulted in numerous deaths each year; despite the government attempting to ban it.
 * Metal kite strings add an extra fatality factor when you figure in power lines.
 * Also the case in Afghanistan. In fact, it's a big part of the novel and film The Kite Runner. The protagonist is so desperate for the winning kite, and thus his father's love, that he . Drama ensues.
 * The practice is so ingrained into kite culture that a kite festival in the US has to explicitly state that no glass or metal may be used in the kite's line in a kite battle.
 * Every year, come late August, with the kite season coming up (kite-flying being part of the traditional sports played during National Day in September), Chilean authorities have to repeat the same message: Do not use glass-coated string, do not fly a kite near power lines...
 * The city of Toronto banned kite flying from a park because of complaints about metallic and glass kite lines. Outrage from citizens shocked that a city would ban something as mundane as kites collided with shock from learning that people would weaponize something as mundane as kites.
 * Rugby tends to ascend to this level in New Zealand: when anti-apartheid protesters clashed with rugby fans over the 1981 Springbok Tour it sparked off the bloodiest rioting in the country's history.
 * Of course, New Zealanders have every right to take rugby seriously; their national rugby team has a winning record against every team it's ever played.
 * UNC and Duke have one of the greatest college rivalries in history; it extends to every sport (with the notable exception of football, because both teams are horrible - Duke hasn't had a winning season in over a decade, and two years ago UNC was booed off the field by their own fans), as well as academics and facilities. Depending on who wins their big rivalry basketball games (they always meet twice in the regular season), there is likely to be some sort of spontaneous celebration in either Durham or Chapel Hill that involves burning things in the streets and occasionally flipping cars, but it's usually too tame to be considered a true "riot".
 * This rivalry is such Serious Business, that a few years ago when Duke lost the NCAA championship to Connecticut, the town of Chapel Hill put a banner across the town's main street congratulating the Huskies for defeating the Blue Devils.
 * Also from College football USC and UCLA fans consider their games to be serious business. Not helped as the schools are close enough for fans of each team living next door to each other. Not helped at all.
 * The NCAA basketball tournament is VERY Serious Business. Commonly referred to as "March Madness", it seems like the entire United States gets sucked into it; people constantly discuss their bracket picks and skip work to watch games. Needless to say, a lot of money is involved in this whole song and dance.
 * Just to hammer the point home for non-Americans, even President Obama thinks that this is Serious Business, as shown here. He even tells the team he picked to win the championship not to "embarrass [him] in front of the nation".
 * I actually lost a day or two of Science and Economics classes due to March Madness. In science class there was some extra credit opportunity to turn in a bracket sheet, with more points if you win. Also apparently I have no will to live when I say that I don't care about march madness.
 * This troper can sympathize: One day in Trig, we had a sub who not only had a bracket, but ignored the teacher's lesson plan to let us watch the games online.
 * Connected to the previously-mentioned rivalry, it is Serious Business for people to HATE the Duke basketball team... across the entire United States of America.
 * Duke-Maryland. Hell, the dipshits get fired up over goddamn LACROSSE.
 * While on the topic of college basketball, can we point out how serious of a business it is when it comes to the University of Kentucky? The Men's College Basketball Team is considered the uniting factor of the state. When the team was having a subpar (for their standards) season, the President of the University was said to be feeling the hot seat because the coach wasn't fired. Attack ads in the Republican Senatorial campaign were created because one candidate claimed to be a Duke fan over a UK fan.
 * Well, it is true that Duke Sucks
 * This one's a long one: on the subject of Kentucky, do NOT mention the name John Calipari to University of Memphis Tigers fans or Memphis citizens period. Why would an ENTIRE city, which is a hotbed of basketball activity and home to many top recruits, write off a man who gave the local college a nationwide name in college basketball despite being in a mediocre confreence and took them to the NCAA tournament six times out of his nine-year career at the school, not to mention going to the National Championship in 2008 after going to the Elite Eight back to back the two years before that? By mentioning that you wouldn't leave the school to a nationwide audience after being knocked out of the NCAA Tournament, only to pack up for Kentucky half a week later, and make matters worse by having what was described as the #1 recruiting class coming in for the 2009-2010 season instantly disappear, with the second best recruit in the nation who declared his intention to coming to the school and the top recruit overall going with Coach X in the following weeks. Oh yeah, and that National Championship run mentioned earlier? The NCAA declared the star player on that 2007-2008 squad retroactively ineligible after the nationwide SAT/ACT testing sevice declared his test invalid and scratched out their 38-2 record (the winningest season ever by a school in the current format), told them to pay back over $500K in revenue from that entire year, and placed them on probation... FIVE MONTHS AFTER CALIPARI LEAVES AND OVER A YEAR AFTER THE PLAYER LEFT FOR THE NBA. The school filed an appeal on the very legitimate excuse that the NCAA cleared the player to play. Yet it was for naught and the NCAA upheld their own ruling, saying it was still the school's fault for letting him playing him after receiving notice that his test scores were iffy, but not invalid, during the middle of the season. The probation ruling was very light however, due to new coach Josh Pastner coming in, but it won't allow the University of Memphis basketball team to get a share of any money the entire conference earned until 2012. The school paper's headline the day after Calipari announced his intention to leave for Kentucky? "John Calipari, 1959-2009: NOW OFFICIALLY DEAD TO MEMPHIS."
 * Although football doesn't have the same level of support in Canada as it does in the United States, the various Canadian Football League teams and their fans still have passionate rivalries. Canadian football fans tend to go especially crazy around September, when the Labour Day Classic is played and the various teams play their most hated rivals in home-and-home games.
 * Winnipeg Blue Bombers vs Saskatchewan Roughriders - case in point: at a Great Big Sea concert the lead singer mentioned that their next stop would be Saskatoon - cue the entire arena booing. (Note that the Riders aren't even from Saskatoon, they're based in Regina.) Alan: "You boo Saskatoon?!"
 * The CFL is especially important in Saskatchewan, mainly because we don't have a hockey team to root for. 65% of CFL gear sold is Rider gear... and God help you if you like the Winnepeg Blue Bombers
 * This tropers mother is from Winnepeg, and recieved DEATH THREATS when she wore a Blue Bombers jersey to Mosaic Stadium in Regina. At least one man attempted to hit her with his car... The Saskatchewan Roughriders are indeed Serious Business
 * Currently, in Turkey, all tourists must take note that mentioning the victory of Besiktas against Fenerbahce is a possible threat to your perpetual well-being. You have been warned.
 * This New York Giants fan after the Giants lost to the Eagles in the 08/09 playoffs. And it was probably even worse for him after my team the Arizona Cardinals beat the Eagles and went to the Super Bowl instead of them.
 * Said Giants fan was eventually brought on Tosh 0 to be told to lighten up.
 * In a less funny example, Junior Tennis. There was once a player who got poisoned by the parents of another player. Those crazy tennis parents.
 * It was said on another Trope page, but calling football "soccer" in some places is grounds for murder.
 * At least several Americans feel the same way about people from "those other fruity nations" calling The Boring Game "football".
 * As well as when they say that pads are for sissies, since in their minds, pads=total protection from injury or harm. This one though is more because of the wallbanging thought process, as even though pads do lessen the odds of serious injury, there are still people being killed to this day in American Football.
 * In Japan, baseball is serious freaking business. A common phrase associated with high school and college baseball is "Practice until you die."
 * At least in all these instances, there are actual games to get worked up about. If you want to see complete abandonment of good sense, watch the coverage of the NFL draft. All the drama, all the overanalysis, mock drafts, urgent updates from the various "war rooms", speculation, prognostication, hand-wringing, head scratching, elation, outrage, and fans... fans!... sitting in and cheering and booing the picks as they happen. All for a bunch of guys who have literally not played one single NFL game! (It gets even more ridiculous when you consider that you can't even begin speculating on their worth to your team until they get signed to a contract, which might not even happen at all.) Mel Kiper Jr. essentially has analyzing and predicting the draft as his entire career. Tell me there isn't something seriously messed up with that.
 * The hype is rarely if ever lived up to. The aforementioned draft expert Mel Kiper, Jr. and dozens of others said to be in the know praised JaMarcus Russell as "John Elway-like" and fully expected him to throw up huge numbers in the NFL. Russell actually did get drafted first, but... let's just say all those experts have quite a bit of egg on their face; Russell is likely to be remembered as the single biggest draft bust in NFL history, never performing with even moderate skill in spite of his illustrious college career. Conversely, one of the most enduring and successful NFL stars of the last decade, Tom Brady, was a sixth round pick.
 * The Heisman Award. I cannot name an award in college football that is more utterly meaningless in every way imaginable, and that includes the BCS Championship. Yet every year, there are massive campaigns, a lavish awards ceremony, and firestorms of controversy over who won and who didn't. We even find out who finished second and third, for crying out loud!
 * And then there was the controversy when former University of Southern California Trojans and current New Orleans Saints runningback Reggie Bush, who had without a doubt the most electric season the year that he won the Heisman (had 2,600 all-purpose yards (rushing, recieving, returning, and passing), and 18 touchdowns (15 from rushing, two from recieving and one as a punt returner) and broke out runs of Sports Center Top 10 Plays quality almost every game) was declared retroactively ineligible as a player for the year he won the award over accepting illegal benefits. Bush and USC airmailed both copies of the trophy they received back to the Heisman Trust, who decided not to declare a winner for 2005. But this didn't stop sports journalists from awarding former Texas Longhorns and current Tennessee Titans quarterback Vince Young, who ironically tore Reggie's Trojans a new one in the 2006 Rose Bowl the next month to decide the national championship, the trophy. And to make things worse, Reggie's name has been stricken from all record books that he is mentioned in, all awards he recieved that year were taken away, and any images or mentions of him in USC's athletic facilities have been removed.
 * The President of France is personally holding an inquest into the French football team's failure to progress past the first round of the FIFA World Cup... the sports minister is on record as saying that "those responsible for this disaster must accept the consequences, first the players, then the team management and after them the football federation," amid whispered campaigns by players that the French people "need to know the truth" of what happened at the camp.
 * Even better, the President of Nigeria suspended the entire Nigerian national team for failing to get out of the group stage. Which means they won't be able to play any matches for two years.
 * This has since been redacted because - get this - FIFA (the world's governing body for the sport) threatened suspension of Nigeria's team from FIFA because the above constituted government interference of the country's program.
 * Even within the game itself. There is a gentleman's agreement that when someone is injured and needs attention, whichever team has the ball will kick it out of play so he can be treated, despite the fact that this will result in a throw-in for the other team. When play resumes, the other team will throw the ball in, and simply kick it down the field to the team who originally had the ball. This is taken very seriously by some, however, sometimes to the point of protesting to the referee when the other team don't kick it back. Despite the fact it's not actually a rule of the game.
 * A sports team losing their best player to free agency. When LeBron James left the Cleveland Cavaliers to sign with the Miami Heat, the reaction was about on par with expectations.
 * Happy LeBronukkah!
 * Association Football/Soccer vs American Football debates are very serious at least on the internet. Both sides are rather respectful in their debate and employ eloquent and well-researched arguments have Flame Wars about each others favored "football" with complete Fan Dumb behavior and absolutely pathetic and not researched arguments to why their sport is better. It would be easier if both sides just said "I just don't like that other football" and be on with it, but that's why it's here in the first place. On that note, calling the former sport soccer is a Berserk Button to Association Football fans. Ironically, in an example of Did Not Do the Research by these two sides, the word was actually coined by a Brit and not an American.
 * Washington Redskins on Dallas Cowboys. America's team my ass. This has been serious business since before the Cowboys existed! Their founder took our fight song hostage! And not just because it was exceptionally racist!
 * Recently, several Pakistani cricketers were caught in a match-fixing scandal. News reports suggest the Pakistani government may charge them with treason for taking payment to throw matches.
 * They were not, in fact, attempting to "throw the match", but rather playing in such a way as to change the conditions of the "spread betting", with which cricket is surrounded. The nature of the game is such that it is possible to bet on each individual event within a match (see rules of cricket for a better understanding of this phenomenon). Which just goes to show how serious a business cricket is, if your country's elected representatives wish you charged with treason for bowling 3 no balls, while still trying to win.
 * In Puerto Rico, Female volleyball is serious business. Boxing too.
 * Ken Burns' first sweeping, epic, 9-part documentary dealt with The American Civil War, a conflict that claimed the lives of over half a million Americans and forever altered the course of the nation. So what did he make his second sweeping, epic, 9-part documentary about? BASEBALL.
 * If you ever get the chance, go to a Notre Dame Fighting Irish football game. You will be amazed at how much they love that team in South Bend, Indiana.
 * High School Wrestling. Parents in some places have been known to shout things like, "Break his neck!" about teenage boys wrestling. In one case, a parent who said this, when called out on it afterward, repeated that yes, she really did want the kid on the opposing team to get his neck broken.
 * The whole thing about taking games seriously can be placed thus:


 * Lakers basketball. When the Lakers are in the finals (which is pretty often) the fans tend to riot in the streets of Los Angeles whether they win or lose.
 * Fandom in general is getting pretty ridiculous. Many have gotten to the point where being a fan of a team makes them think they are part of the actual team, referring to them as "we" and "us" when they talk aobut them. This is despite the fact that said fans have no control over anything that happens on the field, they don't decide who plays, nobody on the team knows them, and often don't give them any money. Even if they do attend games and give them money, they're just spectators. Worse yet, if you bash their team, they take it personally. And don't ever mention to them that they're not part of the team.....
 * Running. The vast majority of runners are only in it for their own fitness, and many marathons are held as charity fundraisers, but God help you if you call them joggers...
 * Scuba Diving. Yes, really. You start out thinking, oh this is fun, but then you see the different certification cards. The Gold 500, the platinum 1000, the Pro 5000, it's scary for a poor, rec diver.
 * The Australia v. New Zealand Sibling Rivalry is usually just a friendly joke... Until sports come into the picture.