The Woobie/Quotes

"Is there truly life before death?"

- Rei Ayanami

"Janson: They have tags for us all now, and I'm the darling one. Tycho is 'the doleful one.' Celchu: I'm not sad. Janson: No, but you look sad. Makes the ladies of Cartann's court want to comfort you. They're so sad about wanting to comfort you that you could comfort them. Hobbie: And Tycho the only one of us with a successful relationship with a woman. Missed opportunities, Tycho."

- Star Wars X-Wing: Starfighters of Adumar

"Played with Kaylee. The sun came out, and...I walked on my feet, and...heard with my ears. I ate the bits. The bits did stay down. And I work. I...function like I'm a girl. I hate it because I know it'll go away! The sun...goes dark, and chaos is come again. Bits...fluids! ''What am I?!""

- River Tam

"I'm an ego-half-empty kind of girl."

- Codex

"Happy....I can't be happy."

- Cameron

"Hey, having an unfortunate past might score me some Moe points!"

- Genma

"This is as close as Harry Kim will ever get to knowing what joy is: an odd sensation of not being completely miserable. "Happiness? Yes, that's the feeling you have when someone stops beating you long enough to catch your breath, right?""

- SF Debris's review of Star Trek: Voyager: The Disease

"There's something about him. I just want to hold him close and whisper, "Everything will be alright.""

- Kelly Chambers, on Garrus Vakarian, Mass Effect 2''

"There are few things more fetching than a bruised ego on a beautiful lady."

- Stuntman Mike

"She gave me for my pains a world of sighs: She swore, in faith, twas strange, 'twas passing strange, 'twas pitiful, 'twas wondrous pitiful: She wish'd she had not heard it, yet she wish'd that heaven had made her such a man... ...She loved me for the dangers I had pass'd, and I loved her that she did pity them."

- Othello, proving once again that William Shakespeare did everything first.

"Not since Quasimodo strolled the streets of medieval Paris have so many people uttered the phrase "that poor man"."

- Frasier

"How do you prove that you exist? Maybe we don't exist..."

- Vivi Orunitia, Final Fantasy IX

"A bullet had found him His blood ran as he cried No money could save him So he laid down and he died Ooooh, what a lucky man he was"

- Emerson Lake and Palmer

"But the damage makes you want to take care of her. She's an injured bird and you just want to be her sexy veterinarian."

- Brett Ehrlich on Zooey Deschanel, The Rotten Tomatoes Show

"I guess I only wanted you, you know, to like me or something. And now, well, I feel so completely stupid...I almost wish I never moved here in the first place."

- Doug Funnie

"We love the idea of someone who is good and yet gets shat on all their lives, but will get what they deserve, regardless of the fact that they don't actively pursue it."

- The Nostalgia Chick

"You've got sucker's luck. Have you given up? Does it feel like a trial? Does it trouble your mind The way you trouble mine?"

- The National

"I spent yeeeears inside Kainé's body. Tormenting her from within. I felt her pain, her emotions, as if they were my own. And there was so much pain..."

- Tyrann

"Capt. Murtaugh: So she's not a spy? Leut. Flinders: No, she's a perfect spy. I like her and I feel sorry for her. She's cleared my first two lines of defense. ... Leut. Sorlie: Of course. The stinging blindness distracted me from the pounding headache. ... Leut. Sorlie: When I was little, I dreamed big. I wanted to build spaceships. Leut. Sorlie: I studied that for fifteen years. I got a couple of degrees, but no job offers. Leut. Sorlie: The U.N.S. military builds all the best ships, enlisting and enrolling in officer school looked like the best way to get to do what I loved. Leut. Sorlie: But it's not called "service" for its ship building. Leut. Sorlie: And that's okay. I developed a new passion: serving people. Leut. Sorlie: When it all came together I had a career spotting dangerous things in order to protect the innocent. Leut. Sorlie: And then today... Today I learned that while I'm keeping the peace, somebody else is killing the future. Somebody who took the same oaths I did, who salutes the same set of flags I do. Leut. Sorlie: Oh, and now my moral woe is compounded by the fact that the only person who notices my pain is somebody who snacks on kittens."

- Schlock Mercenary