Noodle Implements

Wal-Mart

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Wal-Mart or can't be bothered to get explicit. One common way is to imply the general feel and mention a few outlandish items to be used but not how they are used.

Wal-MartWal-MartWal-MartWal-Mart or some truly ingenious torture. The phrasing and circumstance makes it obvious, but the unknown act appears much more intense. Or more silly.

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Wal-MartWal-Mart in that the character in question doesn't really know how to use the items to torture someone.

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Anime and Manga
Wal-Mart'' has, in place of the standard legal warning, a parody thereof which warns that violations will be "dealt with in the most severe manner possible, most probably involving chicken feathers, cod liver oil and a very, very depraved walrus." Wal-MartWal-Mart) are taken as tools of abuse in some way that people aren't quite clear on. Wal-Mart. Wal-Mart. Wal-MartWal-MartWal-Mart to ask for advice concerning an incident involving "a large number of spring onions". One can only wonder exactly how far the initial idea managed to escalate... Wal-MartWal-Mart Wal-MartWal-Mart and a Christmas Tree. Wal-Mart has mention of barrels of gasoline being rolled down the third floor of the highschool back when Izaya and Shizuo attended. No further information, not even a quirky name for this incident, is given. Wal-Mart'' features Germany claiming to have "killed a man in his sleep with only his own moustache and a grape".

Comic Books
Wal-MartWal-MartWal-Mart. Apparently it involved, among other things, fireworks and animals in ridiculous costumes. Wal-Mart'' does this in the end of his last issue when. He then decides to completely disable him, asking if he has a lick-em-aid stick to cause deafness and tweezers and shoelaces to alter his central nervous system and render him unable to "Fine Tune his Sensitivity to Vibrations"...Then realizes he might become an Olfactory Ninja. Wal-Mart he says he murdered someone with a cheeto. Wal-Mart'', Lex Luthor is remote controlling a monster on a solar probe. For some reason, he's also holding a baseball bat. According to the writer, this was meant to convey Luthor's stance as someone whose mind just operates at a different level than everyone else's, and that, to Luthor, holding the bat was an integral part of the plan. Wal-Mart, Lex uses it to simulate smashing the probe's control board since the monster seems to respond to his movements. Wal-Mart'''s Dirk Anger claimed he killed his wife because she would no longer do "that thing with the wig and the chickens and the bath of acid" for him. Wal-Mart'' has them playing a game called 'Thank God you're open,' which specifically invokes this trope; you're supposed to rush madly into a shop with $5 or so, breathlessly tell the cashier the name of the game, and ask for the most outrageous combination of items they can get. Wal-MartWal-Mart had to deal with mirror universe versions of Vulcans that embraced non-logic. So, he told the highly insecure and polite version of himself some implements he needed: Three teenage girls and a squeegee. That plan was promptly dropped when the Vulcans took him by surprise. Wal-Mart: No Man's Land'' has a scene where the Joker, one of his past torture victims (that is alive at the time of the scene), and some of his goons threatening said victim with yams. The victim's reaction says it all: "No please, not the yams!"

Commercials
Wal-Mart implies that he fixed a truck using a paperclip, a ballpoint pen, a rubber band, a pair of tweezers, some nasal spray and a turkey baster.

Fan Fic
Wal-MartWal-Mart'') had this memorable line in chapter seven from Axel. "Okay, we got mace, grenades, six-pack of beer, bazooka, flamethrower, a box filled with genetically enhanced mutated demonic vermin, and a ticket for a free bowl of ramen, ok, we're all set!! Let's go cause some chaos!!" Turns out the rats grow 10 times their size when lit on fire so they never got around to using much of the other items. Wal-MartWal-Mart to the Third Hokage: "You don't get a say in this, old man. Tar. Feathers. Gelding knife. Superglue, walnut groats and two hundred rabid squirrels. Do not tempt me." Wal-MartWal-Mart). Wal-Mart parody: "'Wax' got his nickname after an especially colorful incident in the Himalayas involving three empty water bottles, a ball of twine, one extremely smelly and hideous yak, and two sherpas with a warped sense of humor. Trust me, you do not'' want to hear the details." Wal-Mart fanfic One More, From the Top'', had Soun mention (towards Genma) the Tendo Family Torture, which involves "bubble gum and fluorescent light bulbs". Once Genma leaves the room, Kasumi mentions that she's never heard of the Tendo Family Torture. Soun reveals that he just made it up, that he had no idea how to torture someone with bubble gum and fluorescent light bulbs, and that Genma "always did have a... creative mind." Wal-Mart'' short "Wizard Angst": "You will be dragged by your ears to the basement, where a drunken Filch will be waiting with a cactus and a croquet mallet..." Wal-MartWal-Mart ) feeling pleased at having finally "managed to perfect the plan involving a car battery, a geisha, a metric tonne of boiling ramen, and a rubber chicken" that could kill off his father (although he never actually uses it). Wal-MartWal-Mart torturing Kaji with 'a live trout, a feather duster, a fireworks Sparkler, a nine-iron, a pack of already-chewed-bubble gum, half a pound of salt, two 6-inch candles, a rusty grill scrapper, two rolls of duct tape, and a copy of "Barney the Dinosaur Goes To Washington". Wal-Mart, has Kei Ayanami (sic) demanding some... interesting things from Tokyo-3 after taking over one of NERV's outposts, including one million helicopters, one dollar, and Shinji and Asuka dressed only in ribbons. Wal-Mart: she seems to have a thing for doing unspecified things to people with vegetables (it's a really bad sign if she decides to use cabbage''). "Maya: "I have no idea how she managed to destroy Fuyutsuki's car with [a squeaky mallet]!""
 * The short "Wizard Swears" also gives us the dreaded Elder Swear: "Your mother is a [bleep][bleep][bleep]ing [bleep] lorem ipsum [bleep][bleep][bleep] admitem venium [bleep][bleep][bleep][bleep] traguna [bleep][bleep][bleep][bleep][bleep][bleep] hippopotamus [bleep][bleep][bleep][bleep][bleep] Republican [bleep][bleep]ing Daniel Radcliffe [bleep][bleep][bleep][bleep] with a bucket of r[bleep][bleep][bleep][bleep] in a castle far away where no one can hear you [bleep][bleep][bleep][bleep][bleep][bleep] Soup! [bleep][bleep][bleep][bleep] with a bucket of d[bleep][bleep] Mickey Mouse [bleep][bleep] and a stick of dynamite [bleeeeeeeeep] magical [bleep][bleep][bleeeeeeeeeeep] alakazam!"
 * He also wonders "But where would I get that much tapioca?"

Wal-Mart'' fansite, this guide to being a Death Eater includes the line "The next meeting is scheduled for midnight, 11th June, when I trust we will have the pleasure of watching your initiation ceremony. Please remember to bring a clean handsaw and enough twine. It's so distressing when people don't prepare for these events properly." Wal-MartWal-Mart. Because sadly, some people just don't have Rowling's imagination. Wal-Mart fic has Quistis doing paperwork and receiving the following supply request: "One hundred metres nylon rope. One nun's habit. Motorcycle. Seven rolls duct tape. The list grew longer. Hyne, what did they need'' ten packs of Triple Triad cards for anyway? Not to mention the fertiliser." Wal-Mart'' fanfic, the Doctor has left the Master with Jack. The Master decides to 'kiss and tell' as revenge, so the Doctor walks in on the following exchange: "Jack was choking out, 'The thing with... the thing with the riding crop... I've had something like that happen... you just need to have some antiseptic on hand... but when you add bananas...' 'Don't forget the corset!' 'Stop it! Shit, I'm going to die here... best death I've had... and... and... and a set of bagpipes...' The Master could barely talk between wheezes. 'It wasn't only that... it turned out Frisbees are... you know... like I said before... but the paint was too hot... and....' " Later, playing croquet in the shower is mentioned as another "activity". Wal-MartWal-Mart and scares him out of the room. ""YOU PERVERT! I would never do that with a banana! And the monkeys and French Maid outfit is out of the question! Vanilla pudding! You want me to do what with vanilla pudding?""
 * There is also Gendo's and Yui's conversation about subtly undermining Kyoko Sohryu's authority: "Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" "I think so, but I don't know where we're going to get that much Saran Wrap."
 * Any lists in said guide invariably have similar implements. For example, the equipment list has "Disguise kit, containing: Nun's outfit, false beard, beekeeping veil, Muggle policeman's costume, etc" and a pointy stick, and the list of skills includes yodelling.
 * Zelda fic The Legend Of Zelda Big Brother House mentions that the reason Link never talks in the video games has something to do with Like Likes and Fire Keese in a bathroom and some yeast settling. Then there's the ingredients to Zant's meals, which include ingredients that try to run away.

Wal-Mart Wal-MartWal-MartWal-MartWal-Mart didn't realize that. Wal-Mart'' fic, does this with several items including a Simon playset, a joy-buzzer and a rubber chicken. Wal-MartWal-Mart" Wal-MartWal-Mart'': Wal-Mart, cage, snare trap, baloney, modem…"}}
 * In Wondy Goes to WalMart Green Lantern needed the following items to fix his green lantern ring: A roll of duct tape, a knife with a gut-hook, three popsicle sticks, four feet of 30-amp dryer cord, a caulking gun, a USB cell phone charger, a ping-pong ball, a lithium ion-powered wrench, a carbon filter, a bug zapper, and a rotisserie chicken.

Film
Wal-Mart'', Marsellus Wallace tells Butch that he's going to call several of his men to "go to work" on his rapist Zed with a pair of pliers and a blowtorch, then proceeds to tell Zed that he's going to "get medieval on his ass." Wal-Mart'' shows a group of torturers preparing to torture Monsieur Bonacieux in the Bastille, with the usual rack and branding irons and such, with a rather incongruous shot of a fist-sized potato being placed in a copper bowl near the end. What they were planning to do with it, God only knows. Wal-MartWal-Mart'', comes up with two different sets of implements for making a bong. Wal-Mart Friend''': Hey, man, we're out of papers. Wal-Mart Smoker''': All right. Then get me a toilet paper roll, a corkscrew and some tin foil. Wal-Mart Friend''': We don't have a corkscrew. Wal-Mart Smoker''': All right. Then get me an avocado, an ice pick and my snorkel. Trust me, bro. I've made bongs with less. Hurry up! }} Wal-MartWal-Mart'', one of the characters has a public access television show. "Hello, my name is Philo and welcome to...Secrets Of The Universe. Today we are going to learn how to make plutonium from common household items." The additional footage that was cut lists "an egg beater, a car battery and a bowl of strawberry Jell-O. Put these items in a microwave for twelve minutes at 8000 degrees, and leave your house for several hours." Wal-Mart'' the main character is told its possible to kill someone with only two teabags and some wax paper. When attacked by the villain he waves these items around in the air since he has no idea how it's supposed to work. Wal-Mart'': "Explain again how sheep bladders can be used to prevent earthquakes?" (at 0:09-14) Wal-MartWal-Mart''. According to the director, Wal-Mart (The Olsen Gang'') movies are largely a subversion of this trope. Pretty much all of Egon's plans involve a number of baroque requisites. The subversion comes when we actually get to see all those items being used for surprisingly coherent purposes. The same holds true for the Swedish remake Jönssonligan and the Norwegian remake, which includes six nappies, a violin, a crowbar and a machine gun. Wal-Mart'' movie, the nerdy scientist's angry coworker claims to know how to kill people several ways with any of the office supplies on their desk, including the post-it notes. Wal-MartWal-Mart with, "a lawnchair, six milk bottles and a tuning fork." Wal-Mart'': Ted the Bellboy brings a bizarre laundry list to drunken entertainment moguls in the penthouse on New Year's Eve: "A block of wood. A doughnut. A ball of twine. Three nails. A club sandwich. A bucket of ice. And a hatchet as sharp as the devil himself." We learn the use of most of these, but the ball of twine and the nails are only to confuse the bellhop. Wal-Mart'', Lin escapes from imprisonment in the Scotland Yard with several...interesting items. "Lord Rathbone: Perhaps you could explain to me how Looney Lin managed to escape from the confines of Scotland Yard under the watch of the most respected police force in the world. Doyle: Yes, of course, it's absolutely fascinating. She picked the lock using a deck of rather risque playing cards. Then scaled the walls with a mop, a fork, and various pilfered undergarments. I've got to hand it to the Chinese, they're awfully ingenious, Lord, aren't they? Lord Rathbone: Does your incompetence know no bounds?"
 * The 1970s film Charley Varrick is the source of Pulp Fiction's famous "pliers and a blowtorch" line.
 * It probably has to do with the fact that animal bladders can be cured and blown full of air like balloons, making them absorb the vibrations in large enough numbers.

Wal-Mart, scenes of the diamond thieves going over their list of thieving equipment are inter-cut with scenes of the Muppets going over THEIR list of equipment, which includes a whoopie cushion, rubber vomit, underpants, and a variety of other odds and ends. Wal-Mart" - at a country hotel which is a popular rendezvous spot, the desk clerk on the phone calls out to her husband "The party in the 'Marquis de Sade' suite asks for a Boy Scout uniform and a dozen loaves of bread!" Wal-Mart, the torture tools seem regular, until you see the bouncing ball and the pacifier. Wal-Mart, one of the chefs claimed to have "killed a man, using only this thumb!" Also, he "robbed the second largest bank in France using only a ballpoint pen". Wal-Mart'': "MARTIN BLANK: They all have husbands and wives and children and houses and dogs, and, you know, they've all made themselves a part of something and they can talk about what they do. What am I gonna say? "I killed the president of Paraguay with a fork. How've you been?""
 * In Down By Law, the jailbreak plan.

Wal-Mart''. Ben Affleck's character has had his memory erased after reverse-engineering a complex device. Rather than the huge sum of money he was promised for completing the job, he leaves himself a series of seemingly unrelated items -- among these, a ring, a lighter, a key with a BMW logo on it, a digital wristwatch -- each of which later ends up being useful. Wal-Mart'', when Tyler is interrupted having sex with Marla, he's wearing a heavy-duty rubber cleaning glove on one hand. Its purpose is never explained. Wal-MartWal-Mart: The Banzai Institute is developing ways of delivering food to famine-struck regions of the world by breeding a watermelon capable of being airdropped. Eggs are next. Wal-Mart'', when there's three of the twelve who are NOT in jail yet, they go over a list of popular heist schemes, one of which is called "Hell in a Handbasket", to which Linus replies "We... can't train a cat that quickly." "Danny: Well, we could always... Rusty: By tomorrow? No."
 * Likely a throwback to a similar gag in the first movie, when they're trying to figure out how to blow the power in Vegas after their first plan becomes undermined.

Wal-MartWal-Mart'' both feature a gag about a common handheld egg beater being brought into play in the bedroom. A noodle kitchen implement? Wal-Mart'' features an entire room of noodle implements when the boys wake up in the morning, including a chicken, a flaming office chair, a baby, and a tiger. More are discovered throughout the day. Over the course of the film, the gang finds out how everything/everyone got into their room, except for the chicken. Presumably it was meant to feed the tiger. Wal-Mart On Stranger Tides'' has Captain Jack describe his scheme to release The Black Pearl from Blackbeard's bottle in the film's closing moments: "Jack: We shall need a crossbow, an hourglass, three goats, one of us will have to learn to play the trumpet while the other one goes like this (waggles hands)"
 * In the movie Hexed, Claudia Christian breaks into the hero's apartment wanting to play sex games with him. She askes him if he has mayonnaise and a rake.

Literature
Wal-MartWal-MartWal-Mart''. "..."An' then... then I'm gonna get medieval on his arse." There were more pressing problems, but this one intrigued Mr Pin. "How, exactly?" he said. "I thought maybe a maypole," said Mr Tulip reflectively. "An' then a display of country dancing, land tillage under the three-field system, several plagues and, if my --ing hand ain't too tired, the invention of the --ing horse collar." "Sounds good," said Mr Pin."

Wal-MartWal-Mart gets born and can write his plays (long story), the wizards need (at different points): Wal-MartWal-Mart of King Murune of Lancre (709-745). Wal-MartWal-MartWal-MartWal-MartWal-Mart, an oyster and a large man with a mallet. King Murune didn't make friends easily.}} Wal-Mart characters and readers (in part) by never revealing the particular orifice involved. but that's unnecessary knowledge for the gags. Wal-Mart''. Wal-Mart''. Wal-Mart) Wal-Mart are actually references to real things. Wal-Mart: "There are no delusions for the dead. Dying is like waking up after a really good party, when you have one or two seconds of innocent freedom before you recollect all the things you did last night which seemed so logical and hilarious at the time, and then you remember the really amazing thing you did with a lampshade and two balloons, which had them in stitches, and now you realize you're going to have to look a lot of people in the eye today and you're sober now and so are they but you can both remember." Wal-Mart'' about "the old woman, the priest and the rhinoceros", which even Nanny Ogg didn't understand until she was forty. "Punchline:"
 * "a length of string, a leather ball of some kind, and a large bunch of flowers." (Problem: Shakespeare's parents failed to meet)
 * "the probable date of conception, a stepladder, and a gallon of black paint." (This one is passable if obscure, as in Yorkshire, I believe, painting the ceiling black in the kitchen is a folk remedy to ensure a male child.)
 * "some strong disinfectant"... "and a lot of carbolic soap." (Problem: Shakespeare died of a childhood illness)
 * "some drab clothing, a dark lantern and a very large cosh." (Problem: Shakespeare is killed by a gameskeeper while poaching)
 * Unless it's something that "Bloody Stupid" Johnson was involved in, as he apparently achieved the same effect using nothing but water and common sand.
 * Probably a reference to the joke about the priest, the nun, and the camel. Stranded in the desert.

Wal-MartWal-Mart are a complete fabrication, although the rumor about the dead soldier isn't. Wal-MartWal-Mart not only the subject but his allies. The subject quickly starts singing like a canary. When asked, Sandar admits he has no idea what he'd do with the items, either - he was simply counting on the subject's own imagination coming up with something horrible enough to get her talking. Wal-MartWal-MartWal-Mart involving "a liquid lunch, a particle accelerator, and a pair of rubber bands." Wal-Mart. Wal-MartWal-Mart'', includes a reference to a horror writer who habitually orders a dozen live chickens to his hotel room, where they are never seen again. Towards the end of the book, however, one character reveals. Wal-MartWal-MartWal-Mart: ""As Einda casually wandered towards the bar, she passed by a hairy blue male sitting alone at a four-person table and playing with a piece of string and a small fruit, which explained why he was sitting alone in a crowded bar. Nobody smart bothered an assassin.""
 * The Rite of Ashk'Ente. All we know is that it's a way to summon Death, involving three small sticks and 4ccs of mouse blood (or two sticks and a fresh egg).
 * This one was actually shown in Discworld II: Missing, Presumed...?! PC adventure game. Let's just say it's... somewhat less epic than one could judge from the description.
 * While the purpose of the sticks is unclear, the mouse blood or fresh egg are most likely required because something living needs to perish if you want Death to come for a visit. The minimalistic amounts of the living substance just indicates what is the bare minimum that counts for "life".
 * He does it again asking for salt and cooking oil.
 * A fair number of Elayne's curse words work like this. We're informed that they're particularly vile, but as Elayne doesn't know what they mean the reader is never informed. For example, Mother's milk in a cup and Bloody buttered onions.

Wal-Mart'' by Tom Wolfe has a sex scene in which the characters do "that thing with the cup". Wolfe has admitted that he himself has no idea what they're doing. Wal-Mart Wal-Mart. Wal-Mart'' series; Samkim, Arula and Spriggat loudly discuss Arula's supposed talents of information extraction in front of a captured rat; "On me oath I 'opes never to see that done to a living creature again, 'specially the bit with the three squashed frogs an' those maggoty apples..." Wal-MartWal-Mart himself) mention in passing a few outlandish details of some "off-screen" case. Most memorable one is probably from The Adventure of the Veiled Lodger: "The source of these outrages is known, and if they are repeated I have Mr. Holmes's authority for saying that the whole story concerning the politician, the lighthouse, and the trained cormorant will be given to the public." "Holmes: Matilda Briggs was not the name of a young woman, Watson...it was a ship which is associated with the giant rat of Sumatra, a story for which the world is not yet prepared."
 * Or, from The Adventure of the Sussex Vampire:

Wal-Mart''. Conan Doyle was deeply interested in that story and even wrote a fictional account of it, J. Habakuk Jephson's Statement. Wal-Mart'', a radio show, did an episode inspired by this, entitled "The Tale of the Giant Rat of Sumatra" starring Mr. Hemlock Stones, The Great Defective. Wal-Mart book Sprout Mask Replica: The protagonist narrator and the love interest are in a hotel room, and she says if he orders a bottle of Tabasco sauce and some ice cubes she'll show him something amazing. The narrator recognises this trope, and suggests leaving it there, before pointing out that he has no clue what sexy thing could be done with them. Then they put the sauce on their sandwiches and the ice in their drinks and she shows him something amazing: a mint-edition copy of # 1 of Starburst magazine, complete with free gift. Wal-Mart'' movie has Tony, held captive by the terrorists and required to build them a missile, demanding a long list of missile-building things that ends in a washing machine. He tells Yinsen that they'll be confused enough by the washing machine that they won't wonder too much about the other things. Wal-Mart novel Starfighters of Adumar''. "Wedge: We'll need a wheeled transport, one of the flatcam units our pursuers are carrying, and four sets of women's clothing. Wal-Mart.

Wal-MartWal-Mart.

Wal-Mart

Hobbie: You lied to me."

Wal-Mart, which we do see in enough detail to figure out his scheme: Wal-MartWal-Mart. Wal-MartWal-Mart Wal-Mart'', Violet is commonly stated as trying to invent things with specific noodle implements. Often, she does. For example, making a machine for making staples that uses: a potato, a fork, shoes with clappers on them, and several crabs that live in their room. The "machine" consisted of them using the shoes to herd the crabs, the potato, that looked kind of like a toe, which they snapped at a lot, to get them to snap at it, quickly switching it with the metal wire they're making the staples out of to cut them, and the fork to bend them. Wal-Mart disguise kit. (One photograph purports to show a young woman convincingly disguised as a 1950s-model pickup truck.) Wal-MartWal-MartWal-Mart. Wal-MartWal-Mart" and walk off. Wal-Mart's Guide to Marriage and/or Sex'': "Q. Listen, I, ummm, I have this kind of weird sexual hangup, which is that I, ummmmm... this is very embarrassing... A. Go ahead! Say it! Don't be ashamed! That's what we're here for! To help! Q. Okay, but I want to whisper it. (whisper whisper whisper) A. My God! Really? Q. Um, yes. A. The Joint Chiefs of Staff? Q. Well, yes. A. How do you get the hamsters into the accordion?"
 * I'm not sure it's the trope if we know what she does with them.

Wal-Mart'' has one of the main characters suggesting that a monster threatening her partner can "do several highly improbable, athletically difficult, and possibly biologically impractical things involving its own mother, a few household implements, and a dead fish." Wal-Mart by getting Hitler expelled from an Art Academy due to "an elaborate prank involving the Prefect, a goat, and a substantial quantity of olive oil." Wal-Mart'', Simkin whispers to the emperor of Merilon. The words "Contessa", "Chafing dish" and "Discovered naked" are audible to those around. The emperor surprises everyone by proving he can indeed laugh. Wal-MartWal-Mart'' features several examples; the method of hunting a Snark, for example, involves thimbles, care, forks, hope, a railway share, smiles and soap. Wal-Mart: "The ingenious way in which Dennison and his colleagues broke out of their seemingly impregnable prison, using only a steel belt buckle, a tungsten filament, three hens' eggs, and twelve chemicals that can be readily obtained from the human body, is too well known to be repeated here." Wal-Mart'' example: "Yay! Our gallant navy has captured the nasty Spaniards with only one small leaking boat, two men, one cannon, a pistol, a sharp stick and a sponge!" Wal-Mart'' stories, the priest explains how he knew master criminal Flambeau was a wrong-un: "It's that little bulge up the sleeve where you people have the spiked bracelet." The fact that none of us have ever heard of the spiked bracelet is intended to show that Father Brown's knowledge of the underworld is something special. He follows it up with what might be called Noodle Techniques: "I rather wonder you didn't stop it with the Donkey's Whistle... I couldn't have countered it even with the Spots myself; I'm not strong enough in the legs." This works because we know that criminals have picturesque names for classic scams like the Gypsy Switch (which Flambeau uses on Brown, though he doesn't call it that,) and since there really is one called the Badger Game, there might be one called the Donkey's Whistle. Wal-MartWal-Mart of just how they used those objects to escape. Wal-Mart'', the girls consider ways of getting into an underground, highly booby-trapped vault- the last Item on the list is as follows: " That thing Bex's parents did in Dubai with liquid nitrogen, an earthquake simulator, and a ferret." They rule out this option because they don't have a ferret. Wal-Mart'', the character Jack Thorne is notorious for having pulled these on his students at the university as a form of engineering improvisation. Such assignments included constructing a chair to support a 200 pound man using only paper Q-tips and thread, pulling the answers to the final exam off the roof using only a shoebox containing licorice and toothpicks, and dropping an egg off the building and ensuring it doesn't break using only cardboard toilet paper rolls (that one famously didn't work). Eddie Carr later notes the irony when they face a similar situation making a cast for the baby Tyrannosaur, although eventually they figure it out. Wal-Mart'', when an incident which the readers got to hear about in detail is only described as having involved "pasta and tomato paste". "The ingenious way in which Dennison and his colleagues broke out of their seemingly impregnable prison, using only a steel belt buckle, a tungsten filament, three hens' eggs, and twelve chemicals that can be readily obtained from the human body, is too well known to be repeated here."
 * Also from Dave's columns; "how to have some real "old-fashioned" Halloween fun! Start by gathering these materials: a commercial air compressor, an acetylene torch, a marine flare gun and 200 pounds of boiled pig brains. Next, select a neighbor who ..."
 * Edward Gorey wrote what must be the apogee of this trope, an illustrated short story called The Curious Sofa: a pornographic work, in which, depending on your point of view, absolutely nothing out of the ordinary happens until the very end, or a group of people spend the most perverted week imaginable. "Colonel Gilbert and his wife, Louise, came in after dinner; both of them had wooden legs, with which they could do all sort of entertaining tricks." "They called up to Alice, who, having put on an ingeniously constructed bathing slip, met them in the pool." "Later, Reginald, another remarkably well-set-up young man from the village, provided everyone with the most astonishing little device." And the ending:.
 * But at least what is used for what was explained once per fit from 3 to 8. Though not in details, sadly -- like how exactly you charm a snark with soap.
 * Another one (from the show), where a prehistoric human is explaining in a whisper how they built Stone Henge: "Woah! And what did you do with the jelly?"
 * To make matters worse, by the time Father Brown gets to the Spots, Flambeau doesn't have a clue what he's talking about. Some things are too wicked even for him.
 * Robert Sheckley, Forever:

Wal-Mart'', Toni is last seen hauling around a dozen bricks and ordering several feet of copper tubing. Given how mentally unbalanced she is, the results probably won't involve construction. Wal-MartWal-MartWal-Mart. Wal-Mart'', Harry first met Father Forthill when he asked him to sanctify an entire keg of water. We know that this holy water served to surprise some ghouls, but precisely how Harry used it is never stated.

Live Action TV
Wal-MartWal-Mart, he can get it done. Duct tape usually helps, though. Wal-MartWal-MartWal-Mart needs a folder all its own on here. To be fair, we see on-screen how the stuff eventually gets used, but I DARE you to come in never having watched the show before and figure out how anybody can do science with a jar of salsa, rubber cement and eight raincoats. Or a duck, some bulls, old glassware, liquid nitrogen, 400 cigarette lighters, a cell phone, silicone breast implants, some tubes of biscuit dough, an octopus, buttered toast, a semi-automatic and an airline toilet. Also, Jamie's wall in the back of M5 has many, many totes with names of these taped on them, including one allegedly containing "Raw Meat". "Jamie: Are you thinking what I'm thinking? Adam: I think so, Jamie, but it's gonna be hard to find four oak doors and 30 feet of greased chain!"
 * Played straight in the following exchange:

Wal-Mart as it becomes clear they don't intend to do anything with them from the style of the show, other than the refrence. Wal-MartWal-Mart''. Kenan devises a Zany Scheme to make up for what happened in the episode and tells Kel to get some stuff for him and meet him somewhere. Wal-Mart was described as: "Now, get something, something else, a third thing, and meet me over there. Now come on, Nickname."
 * In Katie Tiedrich's animated parody, Adam lists of a number of decidedly-not-duct-tape supplies he's going to need, which includes seventeen gallons of pudding. Tory gets to feed the leopard.
 * WARNING! SCIENCE CONTENT! Pudding comes in more than two flavors!

Wal-MartWal-Mart}} Wal-Mart'' website and a dead yak and meet us in Santa Barbara! "[CatchPhrase: "awwwwww, here we go again"]"
 * That worked great as a subversion to the trope, as did the exchange which caused the normally aghast Kel to say:
 * One of the last episodes featured a montage of Kenan requesting Noodle Implements from Kel, and then Kel shows up with all of them.
 * But what about all this possum fat! "Do you have any idea how hard it was to find a fat possum"
 * "Get me a roll of toothpaste, a shower curtain, 10 bottles of apple juice, and Gameboy! and meet me at my house around seven"

Wal-MartWal-Mart'' had two German officers who were turned on by the waitresses with wet celery, egg whisks and flying helmets, among others. "Colonel: (in response to whether he wants the egg whisk) "No, not the egg whisk. The electric mixer!" Yvette: (horrified gasp)"

Wal-Mart'', Justin asks Alex's advice of how to get rid of a clingy girlfriend. She tells him he's going to need a road flare, a barrel of maple syrup and a mini trampoline. He realizes after some time what she meant by that. Wal-Mart'' tended to allude to sex like this, although at times, they've used it for torture: "Rasputin! Bring in the bucket of soapy frogs and remove his trousers!" Wal-MartWal-Mart. Wal-Mart involved Rimmer constantly try to cite Space Corps Directives that were pertinent to their current situation, only to completely mangle them have have Kryten inform them what they really were, usually in this fashion ("'Eight-eight-oh-nine-seven-stroke-c'? Doesn't that require a live chicken and a rabbi?") "Lister: I'm supposed to have given them five sacred laws. Five sacred laws! I've broken four of them meself. I'd have broken the fifth, but there's no sheep on board."
 * "Rasputin! Bring hither the skin-diving suit with the bottom cut out, and unleash the rampant wildebeest!"
 * That too.
 * When Lister learns that he's God of the Cat People:

Wal-Mart "Kryten: For my cooking duties, I'm programmed to be proficient in all known off-world eating techniques, including Jovian Boogle Hoops, and the often-lethal Mercurian Boomerang Spoon."
 * In the episode Legion, Kryten drops references to some literal Noodle Implements, as the crew attempt to use Mamosian anti-matter chopsticks:

Wal-MartWal-Mart" Wal-Mart III: "Baldrick, believe me, eternity in the company of Beelzebub and all his hellish instruments of death will be a picnic compared to five minutes with me and this pencil." Wal-Mart? Wal-Mart, a kid is threatened with an "awful waffle". It apparently involves maple syrup and a tennis racket. Wal-Mart'', Sheppard finds himself stuck with Lucius Lavin, trying to come up with a plan to rescue his teammates. Lavin throws out some truly ridiculous ideas which end with him suggesting they get "a magnifying glass and some tape. .....Some poisoned tape." Wal-Mart, the boys were locked in their room until one of them confessed to some misdeed. When we see them next, they're wearing helmets with flashlights taped to them, have strapped pillows to themselves, and are trying to remove a light fixture from the ceiling. Malcolm comments "I swear, on paper this was a great idea." In the DVD commentary, the writers admit that they had no specific escape plan in mind and had just come up with something random. Wal-Mart Wal-Mart''' What does that thing do?
 * Not to mention several instances of ice cubes and any pocket cavity...
 * This is actually a real camp hazing ritual where you pour syrup on someone's stomach, then smack them repeated with the tennis racket so a sticky grid of marks is made. However, we never see it actually performed, and later episodes add more and more unrelated items to the mix.

Wal-Mart''' Looks like a potato peeler.

Wal-Mart''' Oh that is nasty.

Castle: And illegal in 12 states. }} Wal-Mart'' usually don't fit this trope, as we see exactly how his wacky schemes play out in his head, we do get a straight example in the episode "Their Story", in which rather than hearing J.D.'s thoughts, we can hear the thoughts of Jordan, Ted and The Todd: "The Todd (thinking): Oh great, there he goes off into his fantasy world. Now I'm stuck here waiting until he snaps out of it with some weird comment. J.D. (coming out of one of his fantasies): But we'd have to find a whole lot of gnomes! The Todd (unimpressed): That's helpful."

Wal-Mart'': In preparation for a night out with an old friend who always gets him into weird adventures, Ross packs his passport, an extra pair of socks, and a snakebite kit. To which Chandler rolls his eyes: "It's not going to be  exactly like last time!" Although Chandler prepared himself with some Canadian money, since at least one adventure involved a boat headed for Nova Scotia... Wal-Mart does this with sex scenes in the (fictional) movie Le Banquet D'Amelia'': "Buffy: I've never actually seen... well, uh, from the title I thought it was about food. Angel: Well... there was food. Buffy: Right, the scene with the... food. ... Buffy: We can't actually do any of those things. You'd lose your soul, and besides, I don't even own a kimono."

"Devon: What does a girl need to do to impress you, Oz? Oz: It involves a feather boa and the theme from A Summer Place... I can't discuss it here."
 * A possibly slightly more innocuous example from Season 2:

Wal-Mart'': "Bernard: I did do Belly Savalas. Bernard: (In a flashback, drunk) "What? I can't hear you Belly Savalas!" (pulls lollipop out of belly button) "Who loves you, baby?" Fran: You didn't do Cobumbo, did you? Bernard: No. (pause) I didn't have any cigars."

Wal-Mart: "...With a melon?''" "Presenter: ...to stop us from revealing your name, the name of the three other people involved, the youth organization to which they belong, and the shop where you bought the equipment."
 * This one didn't really leave it to the imagination.
 * This one is a classic:

"Narrator: Wait, what's she doing to his - is that a chicken up there - no, no, that's just the way she's holding the grapefruit. Oh, ho, ho! [buzzer sounds]"
 * One audio version of Blackmail has Michael Palin narrating the blackmailed videotape (because there is no video to go along with it).

Wal-Mart.'' Judge Harry has left his job and begun collecting bizarre objects to organize the "ultimate prank." (He never plays it.) Averted in that, at the end, we see what he's built and can conclude what the prank must have been intended to be. Wal-Mart'', we find the following description of a man one of the girls met in a bar. "He knows ten ways to kill a man with a drinking straw! Eleven if you let him keep the wrapper!" Wal-MartWal-Mart) At one point while the squad is watching the finished product, Inspector Luger gets a look of queasy awe and says, "I used to eat that cereal." Wal-Mart, Tommy manages to divert the massive hotel bill they've racked up onto George Takei's account with a laptop, a modem, the keycard to their room...and a shower cap. Wal-Mart, Gary is trying to get out of his impending marriage by imposing ridiculous provisos on Dorothy: "And you have to consent to any sexual act, even if it involves..." (casts about wildly) "...enormous vegetables!" Wal-Mart'': At the Tracy Bowl I, Drew tries to humiliate Lewis. "Drew: I've got a plan, but I'm going to need a dead monkey, some empty liquor bottles, and a vacuum cleaner."
 * There's Gavin Millar(rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr)'s speech about Neville Shunt's railway drama, which is essentially one Noodle Implement after another in rapid succession.
 * "...and the railway crossing: an electric elk called Simon."
 * John Cleese introduces one audio segment with '...and several butcher's aprons.'
 * "...with a large piece of wet paper. Turn the paper over - turn the paper over keeping your eye on the camel, and paste down the edge of the sailor's uniform, until the word 'Maudling' is almost totally obscured. Well, that's one way of doing it."
 * Let's face it; the show is filled with this trope.
 * For the record,
 * For the record, Harris apparently makes a cameo. "Thank you, Black Stallion," is the line heard, IIRC. At which point Barney says, "Harris!" and Harris responds, "Well, Hitchcock did it!"

Wal-Mart'', Sam Malone whispers Niles some advice on how "to really put a smile on Maris's face." Niles responds by asking where he's supposed to find whipped cream and a car battery at this hour. In another episode, Bulldog suggests a party game, "All right Doc, I'm going to need a blindfold, whipped cream and a glass coffee table. [everyone looks mystified] What? Nobody went to camp?"

Wal-Mart. Wal-Mart'': "Ianto: If...you're interested, I've still got that stopwatch. Jack: (confused) ...so? Ianto: Well. Think about it. Lots of things you can do with a stopwatch. Jack: (grinning with understanding) Oh, yeah. I can think of a few. Ianto: There's quite a list. Jack: I'll send the others home early. See you in my office in ten. Ianto: (pulls out the stopwatch) That's ten minutes and counting."
 * Isn't it obvious? He intends to attach the car battery via alligator clips to her nipples, and the whipped cream, well that's pretty self explanatory.
 * Its Maris. The alligator clips obviously would go on Niles's nipples.

Wal-MartWal-Mart ends: "with a lambshank!" Wal-MartWal-Mart Wal-Mart''. When Jon Stewart and John Oliver are discussing torture, at one point John Oliver pulls a turkey baster out of his pocket and suggests that Jon "use it on him." We never find out exactly what he means by that, although we can guess... Wal-Mart'', the team needs to question a pair of teens, but Gibbs refuses to use actual interrogation techniques. Tony picks up the phone and tells the "person" on the other end that he needs to requisition a pair of "genital cuffs", pausing briefly to ask the teens if they have any family history of testicular cancer. When he leaves, the teens spend some time trying to figure out if genital cuffs really exist, and what their specific uses could be--and their fear leads them to reveal the information the team is looking for, right in the range of Tony's off-the-hook phone. Wal-Mart'' described a variety of bizarre implements not the least of which was a nuclear device followed by an explanation 'Surprise party for the ambassador' Wal-Mart'', Gonzo the Great volunteers to perform his new act in front of a hostile audience. All he needs is a typewriter. When Kermit the Frog tells him they don't have a typewriter, Gonzo says, "Then I'll use a cow!" Unfortunately Gonzo is pelted with rotten vegetables and booed off the stage before the details of the act are revealed. Wal-Mart,'' when Victoria tells her most embarrassing story which involves, "a game of truth or dare, a can of whipped cream, and the hot tub at my grandparents' retirement home." Ted then freezes the image telling his kids the story is too inappropriate to tell them, but it wasn't that great. Cut to Marshall saying, "That is the greatest story ever!" Wal-Mart'', he talked about how he wasn't able to swear on the show. He then launched into a bleeped-out rant that ended with him saying "and some SHEEP!" Wal-MartWal-MartWal-Mart... "Caligula: [to a servant] Get these women some fig leaves. [grinning sleazily at Hilda and Zelda] I'm going to show them the secret handshake. Zelda: I've seen enough! [hastily teleports them back]"
 * Specifically: "Requested: One Mark V ECM unit, 1000 km of Fullerene cable, one low-yield nuclear warhead. Purpose: Surprise party for foreign dignitary. --Argosy Special Operations requisition form, CY 9512"
 * Other implements shown on stage before the curtain fell included a trampoline and a flaming hoop.

Wal-Mart'': "Chris: Everything you could ever want from an evening. Songs, choir girls, colourful costumes, fellatio, rabbits... Maxxie: Rabbits? Chris: Don't ask man."

Wal-MartWal-MartWal-Mart''. What dish would you make in 30 minutes that incorporates bone-in pork loin, watercress, taro root, and a melon? Wal-Mart:'' One mysterious experiment calls for a bowling ball, a chainsaw, a Macintosh apple, and a picture of Raymond Burr in short pants sitting on vinyl furniture. Wal-Mart (subverted, in that they used nearly everything): "Richard: [Voiceover] Finally, we were all off the ramp, and as a reward, the producers gave us a box of things to help us survive the perils that lay ahead. Jeremy: [Going through box] ...Some rubber tubing... Durex... Richard: Condoms?! Jeremy: Vaseline... Tampax... and er... Viagra. James: I know we're going to be in the jungle a bit together but, that's a bit extreme. Richard: What kind of party are they planning?"

Wal-Mart'' episode "House Divided": "Wilson: Every time I go to one of your parties, I end up embarrassing myself in some new and unexpected way. House: That whole thing with the duck was hardly unexpected."

"Cuddy: That is such a bad idea... There is no way that won't cause damage to the large intestine. Wilson: Are you keeping us here to torture me? (Leaning forward.) Is that a - bicycle pump?"
 * And "House Training" brings us the following gem (Cuddy and Wilson at a rather weird art exhibition):

Wal-Mart'' one of John Sessions sexual fantasies involves Liza Minnelli, a crossbow and an alsatian. Wal-Mart'' with the Party Quirks game. Collin Mochrie plays an overly dramatic private investigator finding ridiculous clues to a murder. "Colin: What we have here is a pickle.. A piece of thread... And a Don Ho album. Wal-Mart"
 * An episode focusing on Wilson gives only brief glimpses into the patient of the week; House's completely unexplained first theory revolved around the fact that his patient was a tennis pro.

"Colin: Hi, I need some monkey testicles and a cola."
 * Another game, Scenes From A Hat, had the topic "Unusual things for a neighbour to ask to borrow".

Wal-MartWal-Mart. "Michael: Fight your wars with duct tape. Duct tape makes you smart."

Wal-Mart'', a Roman Catholic priest in Illinois was arrested for attempting to shoplift some butter and a sofa cover from a Wal-Mart. The joke was, "It's unfortunate that they didn't follow him home so they could at least find out what part 2 of that plan was." Wal-Mart? Wal-Mart'' involved a man who requested his prey to have a cat and cool whip when he came. We never do find out what he was going to do with this. Wal-Mart: "Look in your medicine cabinet. If it can fit in your ear, my mom can kill you with it. Except a wet-nap, you know, with a wet-nap she can only maim you''." Wal-Mart'', "Need to Know", in which FBI Special Agent Peter Burke and Mozzie, a criminal, have three hours to retrieve $10,000 hidden by their mutual friend Neal Caffrey: "Mozz: But first, some ground rules. I want full immunity about anything you may see or hear tonight. Peter: Let's just say I'll owe you one. Mozzie: I accept your counter-offer. I need your shoelace. Peter: My shoelaces are going to get us the ten thousand dollars. Mozzie: Rule number two: no further questions. Peter: [as he unlaces one shoe and gives Mozz the shoelace] I'm doing this more out of a morbid curiosity than anything else. Mozzie: I'll also need a magnet and a Sports Illustrated. Peter: This is a scavenger hunt now? Mozzie: I refer you to rule number two. Peter: Magnet...No Sports Illustrated, I've got the New York Journal magazine supplement. Mozzie: "That'll do, pig. That'll do." Oh, I also need a twenty-dollar bill. [Peter gives him a twenty] Great, thanks. [Mozzie uses the magnet and shoelace to retrieve a hidden key] Just a key, yes. Another piece of the puzzle. And don't forget, a hammer, a crowbar, and a radio. Peter: Scavenger hunt! Mozzie: "Life is more manageable when thought of as a scavenger hunt as opposed to a surprise party." Peter: Jimmy Buffett. Mozzie: Right."
 * Averted in this case, because we see exactly what he uses the duct tape for.
 * On Channel 4's Alternative Election Night (on the night of the 2010 UK election) Jimmy Carr noted that he's not allowed to say what he really thinks of the election candidates until after the results are in. We then see a message of what he'd supposedly like to say to Nick Griffin, in which every word is censored except 'car park' and 'tethered to an alligator'.

""There are many things of which a wise man might wish to be ignorant.""
 * Partially subverted in that Mozzie eventually uses most of the items on camera; however, while we hear him wield the hammer and crowbar we can't see what he smashes, so we don't know exactly why he's in such a hurry to leave afterward.

Wal-Mart'', Shawn Spencer's plan to deal with hostile reptilian aliens requires a Speak-N-Spell and seven pounds of mashed potatoes. Wal-MartWal-Mart''. Wal-MartWal-Mart to repulse her with weird hobbies and odd demands. It doesn't work, leaving them to wonder if perhaps Anna is Unrepulsable. Jeff insists that he can repulse ANY woman. "Jeff: No, sir, not on my watch. Morgan: What are you suggesting? Jeff: You're going to need a quart of peanut oil, some bubble wrap, and as much yarn as you can find."

Wal-MartWal-Mart: the interpreter says he could demonstrate what "after-sale service" meant in his language, "if I had a goat, and four pairs of marigold washing-up gloves, a very short billiard cue, and a local radio weatherman. --But that would only hint at what the word means." Wal-Mart''; in "The Impossible Astronaut" the Doctor asks for "A SWAT team ready to mobilize, street-level maps of Florida, a pot of coffee, twelve Jammie Dodgers, and a Fez." He's sitting in the Oval Office while saying this. ""Things Happening. Well... four things. Well... four things and a lizard.""
 * At the end of Blink, as the Doctor is dashing out, he says that things are happening,

Wal-Mart'': "Barack Obama: Larry, I admit my greatest moral failure in high school was using marijuana, cocaine and alcohol. But there's no truth to the rumor I went to the sophomore toga party with a duck and a can of Crisco."
 * It should be pointed out that while he's saying this, he's carrying a long-bow, while Martha is carrying a quiver of arrows.

Wal-Mart: You're never entirely sure how Pugsley manages to get money out of a living piggy bank. Wal-Mart was infamous for this. In the midst of preparing for a manhunt, he gives Radar the following instructions: "Col. Flagg: And, uh, round up a box of scorpions. About a dozen. Radar: You mean, uh, "scorpions" scorpions? Col. Flagg: Big ones. Hawkeye: What the hell are you gonna do with a box of scorpions? Col. Flagg: It's personal. Gift for a friend. ... Col. Flagg: If you can't find scorpions... get two snakes and a rat."

Wal-Mart'', while "confessing" his "crimes", Tyrion Lannister starts confessing one incident, but is cut off before he can give more than the noodle implements. "Tyrion: I once brought a jackass and a honeycomb into a brothel--*"

Wal-Mart, Brady and Boomer are trying to prevent the dark side from reaching Zadoc(a stone statue) which will allow him to back to life. Leading to this exchange: "Brady: Since the dark side has moved 2 feet, we're gonna buy this island some time and move Zadoc back 4 feet. Boomer: Impossible! We'll need like 20 yards, a thick rope, an intricate pully system, and at least several strong men. Brady: I got 2 skateboards and a stick of butter. Boomer: That'll work too."

Wal-Mart'' episode "Bomb" three things Vyvyan needs to use to dispatch the bomb are "the drill, the hedge trimmers, and some ordinary household bleach." Wal-Mart, Mandy's plan involves three zebras. She doesn't get to the rest of her list, because Sam immediately cuts her off. Wal-MartWal-MartWal-Mart. Wal-Mart'': Roy finds the subject of one's parents having sex distasteful: "Roy: Look, my mother was a saint. My father was a pillar of the community. The last thing I want to do is imagine mom wrapped in cellophane and dad wearing tights and a miner's helmet. I didn't wake up and ask for a drink of water again for 25 years."

Music
Wal-Mart wrote a song titled "To the Workers of the Rock River Valley Region: I Have an Idea Concerning Your Predicament, and It Involves an Inner Tube, Bath Mats, and 21 Able-bodied Men." It has no explanation and no lyrics. Wal-Mart's'' "La Vie Boheme:" "Mimi Marquez, clad only in bubble wrap, will perform her famous lawnchair-handcuff dance to the sounds of iced tea being stirred." (The line is spoken in jest, but the mental image is nonetheless interesting.) Wal-MartWal-Mart'' show: "Mr Wizard: Today Timmy, we're going to learn how to make a nuclear reactor out of this spatula, an old inner tube and some macaroni noodles! Timmy: Gee Mister Wizard, aren't nuclear reactors dangerous? Mr Wizard: No Timmy, but macaroni noodles are, that's why I'm going to have to ask you to wear these safety goggles."
 * And then there's "Maureen Johnson, back from her spectacular one-night engagement at the 11th Street lot, will sing Native American tribal chants backwards through her vocoder, while accompanying herself on the electric cello . . . which she has never studied."

"Oh! Hello! Coy? Where have you been? No, you wasn't at the meeting! Well, I found out that at three o'clock this mornin' you was out there in your Fruit of the Loom's in the motel swimmin' pool with a bunch of them waitresses from the cocktail lounge! I just hope Charlene don't find out about this, Coy! What? Well, how'd you get that big motorcycle up there on the high dive, Coy?"
 * Ray Stevens' classic "It's Me Again, Margaret" describes an obscene phone caller, who in the last verse uses his one phone call after his arrest to call the titular Margaret one last time. He informs her that when he gets out, he's coming over with a weed whacker, a live chicken, and some peach preserves. The video goes one further, having Margaret show up at the police station with said items.
 * Another Ray Stevens song "Shriner's Convention" featured some spoken lines where Bubba the Illustrious Potentate is scolding a Shriner named Coy over the phone. Several Noodle Incidents and implements are mentioned:

Wal-MartWal-Mart... Wal-MartWal-Mart, I'd say that a "Great Day" is what we should be expecting, by this point. "Quick, for the potion, we have to get three dozen crabapples that fell off a raggedy old tree right in the southwestern corner of Columbus Park! Faster, we have to go up to Caputo's Produce and Fruit Market on Harlem and get the garden snake that lives in the banana bin! Hurry, we have to get the mercury out of the old thermometer they have through the north-facing doors to the left by the shoe-shine boys in the lobby of the Monadnock building! And don't be late, for you must get the silver out of the teeth of one George Karmalitis, who as we speak lies dead under a dirty wool blanket in the basement of the morgue of Laretto hospital: The silver teeth of a man killed by a jealous wife!"
 * "Fairie's Aire and Death Waltz." (One piece, two pages, more may exist.)
 * . ....The Hell?
 * It means "Ukelele". Mind OUT of the gutter.
 * It's got penguins and explosives. There are less logical assumptions.
 * The Traveling Wilburys' "Cool Dry Place" has a moderately eclectic set of things, many of which are musical instruments though the list also includes "old athletic shoes" and "things that sometimes hum." However, they're not actually being used to build or do anything, they just apparently all need to be stored in a cool dry place.
 * Tom Waits' "What's He Building?"
 * A mammoth one in The Fiery Furnances' "Seven Silver Curses"; Matt's grandmother and her sister are running all over town collecting items to cast a spell on her husband so he'll stop cheating on her:

Wal-Mart contains this line: "What do we do with ten baby shoes, a kit-bag full of marbles, and a broken billiard cue?"

Music Video

 * "Gimme a bottle of anything... and a glazed donut... to go!"

Wal-Mart == Wal-MartWal-Mart all along. Wal-Mart'', Alice temporarily becomes a telecommuter. The Pointy Haired Boss and Asok develop a plan to get her back in her cubicle, which involved tranquilizer darts, a giant flatbed truck, and a giant shoehorn (harpoon optional). Wal-Mart. Read the strips for September 18 and 19 of 2007 for a glorious example. The July 20, 2004 strip contains an example including a chicken suit and monkeys in space.
 * In this new Garfield strip, we have a rather hilarious example. What on earth happened to Jon that would require these...random objects?
 * A belt to hold up the remains of his pants, a Fire extinguisher to put them out, and... I don't know about the fishbowl.
 * The fishbowl is to help put out the pants if the Fire extinguisher runs out.
 * It's not that hard to figure out which each of them is used for, knowing in the context that Alice has gained considerable weight due to sitting in home all day.
 * Not to mention they scrap that plan in favor of building a giant cubicle around her house.

Radio
Wal-Mart'', "Tales of Old Dartmoor". Grythpype-Thynne asks Neddie for a "strange request". Neddie announces he'll do it at once. After some receding footsteps, most of a minute of strange sound effects including grinding, slams, bells, and then approaching footsteps, Neddie returns and says... "Ned Seagoon: Grythpype-thynne:"

Wal-Mart manages to steal some extremely expensive whiskey without getting caught, despite the fact that he is on everyone's watch list, using nail varnish and a non-existent television aeriel.
 * Another of many possible Goon Show examples: the episode 'The International Christmas Pudding' contains the following list of 'vital equipment':
 * One knee-action, self-reciprocating Christmas Pudding gun.
 * One hand painted inflatable Christmas Pudding decoy with rubber hollow.
 * One portable plastic and gravel road.
 * One long bent thing with a sort of lump on the end.
 * One waterproof cover for same.
 * One same.
 * Thirty-three boxes of yellow kosher boots.
 * Another long bent thing with a sort of lump on the end.
 * One uncooked leather trilby with sugar feather.
 * One sixty foot explodable granite statue with built in plunger.
 * Detailed plans of what to do with long bent thing with a sort of lump on the end.
 * The following year he manages the same feat, even though he is constantly supervised and frisked twice. He used a treatment for nail-biting, that time.

Stand Up Comedy
Wal-Mart's jokes involves the fact that singles have more interesting sex lives than married folk. "So there I was, tied down to her bed. Had motor oil smeared all over me. She came in with a saddle and a pair of jumper cables..." Wal-Mart had a song explaining what happens when Mummy and Daddy love each other very much... basically Daddy installs a special sling from the ceiling, Mummy wears a pig mask and Daddy wears scuba gear, then they put on their favourite H.R. Pufnstuf video and it's apparently on for young and old. Who knew? "'I need a Bible, some road flares, and some gaffer tape!' 'OK, try aisle 12.'"
 * Comedian Rich Hall joking about how easy it is to buy absolutely anything in Walmart:

Wal-MartWal-Mart. Wal-Mart once related an incident where he attempted to purchase vaseline and jumper cables (for his car repair) and a box of condoms (favor for a friend who was out). The cashier came to the conclusion that these were all for the same event and asked "Dude, what are you going to do to her!?!" "There's always an advert with a wife sorting her husband's washing, and she's all "Oil? Blood? And grass stains? Ha!" ...is she not the slightest bit fucking suspicious?!"
 * It's true though. Where else can you save the world on a beer budget?
 * Another great line from Carlin (when describing the removal of a growth): "This was a part of my head a minute ago! But not anymore; I pried the bastard off with paint thinner and a Phillip's-head screwdriver."
 * During one of his shows Larry the Cableguy said he once went to Cosco and bought a 10 gallon drum of ky jelly and 5000 cocktail weiners, just to mess with the head of the cashier.
 * British comedian Lee Evans discusses how detergent ads always come on when a serial killer is on the loose:

Tabletop Games
Wal-MartWal-Mart'' book, a character asks for a combination of threatening items (but ones which don't make much sense when you put them together). He reveals to his companion after the subject squealed that he was leaving it up to the subject's imagination. Wal-MartWal-Mart from that continent. Wal-Mart the first of Shorter Buckleswashers adventuring band was killed in an incident involving "a narcoleptic dragon, several angst-ridden teen-aged mages, a flying carpet that was convinced it should be their leader rather than a mere possession, and a magical glowing chicken that turned out to be a transformed and furious drow priestess." Wal-Mart'' core rule book, one of the Demon Hunters, Gabriel, is addressing the audience. He is relaying advice his mentor once gave him saying, "Whatever you do..." which fades out to static. Through the static, a few words can occasionally be made out. Eventually, the picture returns, with Gabriel still speaking. He continues, "...with a yak. That's the worst way to go." Wal-MartWal-MartWal-Mart, but more transparent one. "Put me in the rack, Put me in the pillory, But don't let me go like Sir Edmund Hillary."
 * The Dean of Abjuration from the Wizards Guild of Raven Bluff dislikes gnomes to the point of rudeness and not even speaking directly to his fellow Dean of Illusion. He refuses to speak about the incident which caused this, but it's known to involve an obelisk, a five-headed dragon and talking spiders.

Wal-Mart "1549. The totalitarian government tends to notice large purchases of cows, trebuchets and surveying gear."

Wal-Mart''. Wal-MartWal-MartWal-Mart; They're generally working with scraps from other devices. Wal-Mart expansion lets your bard tell a story so funny, it can free creatures turned to stone. The description notes that this story is about a humorless old woman who was eventually made to smile by "increasingly unlikely events involving a cart of horse manure, a king, and a flying carpet."

Toys
Wal-MartWal-MartWal-MartWal-MartWal-Mart out!

Video Games
Wal-Mart 61!" Wal-MartWal-Mart, arguably the epitome of Nintendo evil, can be defeated by: A butterfly net, an empty bottle, nuts, and a fishing pole. Wal-MartWal-Mart}}. Wal-Mart. Wal-Mart uses this trope in several of the female Draenei's 'flirt' and 'silly' emotes, including one involving butter and jumper cables and another is a recipe involving 2 gnomes and 2 eggs. Unfortunately, the one asking about whether gnomes have a vibrate setting didn't make the final cut. Wal-Mart: "Panther King: You know what happened last time. Professor: [nervously] Only too well, only too well... Wal-Mart"

Wal-Mart'' asks the friendly natives of the titular island about the whereabouts of his true love who has been kidnapped by a ship crewed by ghost pirates. Unfortunately, it didn't come out quite right. "Guybrush Threepwood: I'm looking for thirty dead guys and a woman. Meathead: Whoah, I'm not sure what you're planning there but count us out!"

Wal-Mart chapter 1, Guybrush misleads a guy by musing about how he's going to get past an ancient stone door, and mutters about going to gather "Several sticks of dynamite, a rubber chicken with a pulley in the middle, and some sort of rudimentary lathe..." Wal-Mart is largely based around using utterly bizarre items (such as a crayon, a kazoo and an egg) for the purpose of saving the world from aliens. Wal-Mart'' can get like this. "Let's see... I need a crutch, a steam gauge assembly, a pressure cooker, a fission battery and about a hundred railroad spikes." Wal-Mart Wal-MartWal-MartWal-Mart, and a device that can trace the temporal origin of a given object. With these, you can make your attacks do more damage. Wal-Mart''. Scribblenauts, world. Wal-Mart, a tranqulizer gun, and a baseball bat. You?"}} Wal-Mart. Many of the items have a logic as to how they fit together, it's just that one wouldn't normally think to combine a skewer and a rat appendix to make a rat appendix kabob. Wal-MartWal-Mart (or Douglas Fairbanks), and a Cleveland phone book. Despite the game's naughty theme, the objects aren't used to build some sort of sex toy. Wal-Mart, the required offering for Sheogorath's quest is a spool of yarn, a head of lettuce, and a soul gem. Justified in that he * is* the Lord of Madness. Wal-Mart, Doc constructs a catapult out of six each of the following items: springs, propellors, jumping stones, domino stones and piggy banks. While in this case, we do know what he does with them, we don't ever get to see how.''] Wal-Mart II. "Medic: Here's some lotion, a comb, and a blowtorch. Good luck!"
 * Arguably, most of the solutions to puzzles in this game are noodle implements. What requires a pot on a fire, wine, gunpowder, a rubber chicken with a pulley down the middle, breakfast cereals, ink, a jolly roger flag, breathmints, and some cinnamon?.
 * So, I need a tin can, a radioactive cola, some abraxo cleaner, and turpentine.
 * I've got a paint gun, a toy car and a radscorpion poison gland, now all I need is some surgical tubing and I'll be ready!
 * Just to qualify, this one has nothing to do with the Shivering Isles expansion. By "Sheogorath's quest", it means one of those Daedric quests you can do if you find one of those Daedra statues in the vanilla game.

Wal-Mart'', some descriptions of events a player does, especially in adventure mode, can seem like this. Even if the character is a master thrower and picks up whatever they can find, the descriptions can just be confusing. "Man, this is just like that time with an bronze giant, two whales, some sand, that flaming bush, and the king's gaurd. Well, actually, I don't have camelskin bag this time."

Wal-MartWal-MartWal-MartWal-MartWal-Mart, Heavy claims, "More than you think..."
 * Then there's strange moods, which will leave you curious about what they intend to do with a lump of tetrahedrite, two cut gemstones, some alpaca wool, a wolf skull, a mussel shell and some platinum bars.

Web Animation
Wal-Mart'''s Ellis does this a lot: "Montrose: What we need is a distraction. Ellis: If only my uncle were here. He could do things with a beet and a chicken that would distract anybody."

"Ellis: I was getting tired of the nightmares I had where you'd murder me in my bed with an eggbeater and some perseverance."
 * and

Wal-Mart'' has this little exchange: "Sarge: Donut! Initiate 'Traitorous Simmons Plan Number 11'! (Donut then shoots Grif) Grif: (OW!) Sarge: No! Number 11! Donut: Where the hell am I going to get a steamroller?!"

Wal-Mart from parts of an old protocol druid and other of "her personal items". "Sarge: Alright, let's get going. Everybody packed? Caboose: Yep. Grif [to Caboose]: Where's your stuff? Caboose: Oh, I only carry a washcloth and six toothbrushes. Grif: I'm gonna assume that makes sense to you. Caboose: Yeah, it does. Grif: Yeah, I thought so. We'll just go ahead and leave that one alone."
 * In Chapter 7 of Recreation:

Wal-MartWal-Mart}} asks for yogurt... because it helps him think. Played straight in the next scene. Wal-Mart will have this. Wal-MartWal-Mart is stealing Homestar's melonade and The Cheat whizzing in it, and thus they can't properly gloat about their success.
 * Sometimes representing math via interpretative dance can get tricky.
 * How does Setzer attack with dice?
 * People must really not like the words in books or the notes played with a musical instrument. Or they're hit over the head with them.
 * We can think of several ways Janice attacks with carrots. None of them are fun.

Webcomics
Wal-MartWal-MartWal-Mart. This was, of course, lampshaded in the episode's title: "As Good an Explanation as is Forthcoming" "Elan: Uh, dad? Haley and I need to go have sex. Wal-Mart, and bring the cat.
 * In Everyday Adventures of Joovia & Friends our redhead heroine, Joovia just got her new favorite toy. She ran into Jeremy at their spot in the coffee shop.
 * Later, when they need an excuse to leave the room...

Tarquin: ...Huh."

Wal-Mart'', Agatha's first attempt at fortune-telling leaves her babbling: "She... tea cozy... forty-three hours... only one spoon... how... eek!" ""For this performance, the Mechanikopera has recreated the original choreography, including all seventeen soup waiters, three ladder teams and the original roller skating giraffe!""
 * Later, one "intricately choreographed" number from a sparky opera is left to the imagination:

Wal-MartWal-Mart for comedy. Wal-MartWal-Mart''. Wal-Mart'', Red Mage is able to save the party (actually, the party minus Black Mage) from an aircraft crash with a portable hole, an immovable rod, a bag of holding and an ice spell. How, we'll never know. Wal-Mart, and an ice spell. Go figure. Wal-Mart: An adventurer can do anything with a portable hole, an immovable rod and a bag of holding! No idea where the ice spell comes in. Wal-MartWal-MartWal-MartWal-Mart Wal-Mart'' had a great rescue plan. Wal-Mart has stated that the reason Sam Starfall was exiled from his planet was an incident that involved a dirigible, a loop-de-loop and lots of pudding. Wal-Mart'' is mentioned as having been fired from his first job after "a curious incident involving a goat, a jar of mayonnaise and a grand piano". Wal-Mart'': Aubrey has a plan to prevent PeeJee doing something even she thinks is going too far: "I need four cellphones, ten balls of yarn, and two nights worth of cigarettes. I've got a miracle to perform." We do find out what it is. Wal-Mart'' features the following: "Is it the plan where they need finger paint, water skis, poker chips and inflatable cacti? It's the plan where they disable the teleporter. Too bad, the other one sounds more interesting."
 * We shall never know what a mad scientist can do with a thousand orphans, a hedge maze and enough cheese.
 * Presumably similar things to what less mad and less sciency scientists do with a smaller maze and mice.
 * And after an incident that happens off-panel: "Thank goodness you had all those clockwork ducks, Klaus."
 * This strip ends with a very weird visual one.
 * Three words: House Rules Parcheezi.
 * Also on Take your Daughter to Work day, that conversation Ozy had with Llewellyn that got censored. No shortage of implements here
 * Later his plan to smuggle Florence out of the E.U. compound is foiled by the guards being absent (and the gate is left open). It involved a coffee pot, half a ream of paper, and three fully automatic hot glue guns.
 * Edge can convey doom in three words or less.

Wal-Mart'', Claire declares that in order to start a good-size revolutionary riot, all she needs is three tomatoes, a size nine-and-a-half shoehorn, a bit of string and a small wooden spoon. When questioned, she sighs "They ALWAYS ask about the spoon..." Wal-Mart'', though it does get explained over the course of the next few weeks: "Dave: I have to retool the teleporter, crash the Dave Conspiracy, and buy a large bucket of fried chicken. Fast."

Wal-MartWal-Mart'' apparently involved "a toilet plunger, the Buddha's stone bowl, a kendama, a Christmas tree, and three stuffed rabbits" and it "took weeks to find all the patches from (Mokou's) overalls again." (The creator "just wanted to make a comic involving death-by-noodle-implements.") Wal-Mart'' involves a character coming up with a plan that requires "two geese, a roll of duct tape, twenty-three toothpicks, and some sodium benzoate." It was initially coined by Tamara, though Jo and 32 have also used it. Wal-Mart'' comic. Wal-MartWal-MartWal-MartWal-Mart And six trained goldfish.''" (Link.) "Aldus Vanderbeam: I also learned I wasn't good at talking to nude models, art professors, the dean of the art department, and campus police. You will never hear that story."
 * In this comic, a guest artist actually speculates on how exactly those items could be used to "crush spirits and ruin lives, all while delivering a healthy dose of funny". He ultimately concludes that he has no idea but that they can set a "genuine sense of fear amongst those with weak constitutions".
 * Earlier:

Wal-Mart'' strip: "Dr. Lee: You're threatening me with something you're not authorized to tell me about. ... Number Fifteen: Okay, okay, it involves walnuts. Don't ask me again."

Wal-Mart'', the title character is seen in a flashback saying the following: Wal-Mart?}} Wal-Mart. Wal-Mart'' strip lists "Zii's spectacular get lucky kit. Satisfaction guaranteed!": "Condoms, lube, different sized condoms, music to get her in the mood... Good. Then you need about 4 liters of canola oil, a pair of hard-soled boots, two different types of rubber hose, a pair of handcuffs and an extra set of keys..." Wal-MartWal-Mart.) Wal-Mart "seem to have vanished completely attempting to pull a tooth with string, a doorknob, and 30 sticks of dynamite". Wal-Mart, the majority of Leaf's plans seem to be something like this. While in the Void, he decides that, in order to escape, he'd need three sticks, a sheet of paper, and two hundred spans of thread. Wal-MartWal-Mart''. ""And you were thrown out of microsoft headquarters for...trying to feed a squirrel through a fax machine?" "I forgot about that! It was part of an argument with Steve Ballmer about Vista. Which I won, by the way.""
 * Not to mention strip6 the worst perversion of science Unity has ever seen...
 * Matt has some interesting fantasies.
 * ...and finally, the aftermath!
 * And then twisted into Noodle Locations in this later comic.
 * And turned into a plot here: "so long as the raptors don't invent lightsabers."
 * Not to mention: "Why do you have a crossbow in your desk?"
 * To say nothing of this one.

Wal-Mart''. A tutu, big coconuts, bear fur suits (to be worn without pants) and the key element is a little plush bear of doom? Wal-Mart's Tycho creates something very much like this with one implement'' in Exile from Guyville. Wal-Mart'' has genius Jyrras demand his friend to open the door or he'll do it himself with some floss and a spork. Wal-MartWal-Mart Oh and there was a puffer fish." Wal-Mart: "Some sort of high-speed, ballistic goose-related incident!" Wal-Mart somehow involves fish head, toe jam, and liverwurst...and that's not all of it. Wal-Mart, cheese whiz, and ferrets. Wal-Mart'' has a interview with a heavy metal singer that, due to heavy censoring, ends with just a single noodle implement: "'Cause in this world, no one ing cares about you. No one gives a ing if you or just   ing  ing   with a rubber hose!"
 * Sporks seem to be fairly common utility in DMFA, with Dan using one to defeat a legion of Death Knights.

Wal-Mart Wal-Mart comic, in which Piro tunes out Largo's rant about how to defend their new apartment, and all we get to hear is "...And that's why we need to find a store that sells rocket launchers. Help me with this phone book." Wal-MartWal-Mart. Wal-Mart'' : "My Limit Break involves a moose, the demon Baphomet, and a Kuiper Belt object." Wal-MartWal-Mart, of course. Wal-Mart'', Matt O'Morph gained his superpowers when, "during his college freshman chemistry class, there was a bizarre accident involving an unknown alkaline solution, a dash of monosodium glutamate, a live electrical wire, a pack of Big Red cinnamon gum, and a mosquito." Wal-Mart'', this trick-or-treater can do some interesting things with one "D" battery, 600 ostrich feathers, a two-stroke motor, 16 grams of potassium chloride... and a male cheetah. Wal-Mart'' once mentioned a rather creative use of a toilet seat and a rubber chicken. Wal-Mart'' noted that an eye can be put out with the use of a funnel, sushi, and a small wager. Wal-Mart was demonstrated. Wal-Mart, Dan was apparently going to start a new story involving ninjas, japanese bath houses, and hamsters''. Lots of hamsters but this was scrapped because he had to deal with the aftermath of a party he threw celebrating the conclusion of the previous arc. Wal-Mart'' here: "It's not quite as interesting as my plan, but since we seem to be all out of stilts and ventriloquist dummies, it'll have to do..." Wal-Mart'' strip, Tristan tells the new teacher Mr. Kyokasho that she's been "checking up on [him]" to find weak points...: "Mr. Kyokasho: Did you find any? Tristan: Maybe. Mr. Kyokasho: (casually) I hope you didn't find out about that incident with the water hoses and the ketchup in St. Louis. Tristan: Uh..."
 * And the animation takes 4 hours.
 * So he uses Baphomet to summon Pluto... don't see where the moose comes in.
 * The moose rides on Pluto.
 * It's a long story involving a pickle fork, a jug of lemonade, and the Kiwanis.
 * And here: Lucile and Maxim once defeated over thirty pirates with a wooden spoon and a mirror.

Wal-Mart'': the incident in question is actually seen on-screen, but Jade's explanation still counts. "GG: all that stuff blew up TG: blew up GG: its a long story that involves a pinata and a gun and a very naughty doggie Wal-Mart"

Web Original
Wal-Mart are sent to survive amidst the light and joy of Disneyland for 48 days) featured this. A relationship arises between two of the Goths, Angry Kitty and Doomboy, leading to some implied sex with rather kinky toys. Their idea of foreplay involves "a charred top of a grill and two barbeque forks;" they later run off to play with "a recently acquired pair of hot dog tongs and a pizza cutter." A later entry mentions Doomboy's thoughts of "Angry Kitty in a bikini, with a weedwacker and a stack of moist towelettes." Yeah. Wal-Mart used to do a Q&A session on WWE.com called "5 Questions with the Champ." When a fan would ask a question such as "How did you spend your birthday?" or "How do you plan to spend the holidays?" he would say that "to protect the guilty," he wouldn't say exactly, but that it did involve [ Insert Noodle Implements Here], some of which were: packets of Mayonnaise, children's golf clubs, a Samoan, Pay Per View cable, and massive amounts of alcohol. Wal-Mart in this video. Wal-Mart review of Grease features a subplot of BFF Nella being forcibly given a makeover from the Makeover Fairy. Tools the Makeover Fairy uses in her attempts to beautify include an eggbeater, a hammer, a skull, a power drill, an iron (implied use on clothing not removed from her body, a sanding file, pliers... "Shit, I've got less than two weeks to shoot Bending for Bennett. Anyone know where I can get five otters on short notice? Alright, I've got the Otters, but the next procurement is gonna be a bit more challenging. Anyone know where they're keeping JFK's brain? So I've got the location pinned down for JFK's brain, and I'm getting a case of otters on its way. Now all I need is a woman...."
 * Galertruby is a master of this trope. As a zombie who's missing his jaw, most of his blog posts come out as complete gibberish, but the mouse-over hyperlinks work just fine. So when you come across a post titled "Galertruby's Guide to Dating" which is mostly composed of five paragraphs of nonsense, but which includes hyperlinks to a broken wine bottle, a gnome effigy, a flask of Big Mojo, and a set of plate-armored leggings, you know there's gotta be a good idea in there somewhere.
 * In Bennett the Sage's Twitter account, several are referred to in relation to his upcoming review:

Wal-Mart replies, suggesting he use a seal instead: "I'm sorry, but have you ever tried to get a seal to lick hot cheese off your nips? I mean, besides that weekend in Aruba?"

Wal-Mart on Transmission Awesome. Enough said. Wal-MartWal-Mart were pleasured by Linkara, or so they tell him in "Linking Up With Linkara: the "Cincinnati Helicopter", the "Oklahoma City Taco Stand" "I don't know how he did to both of us at the same time..." Wal-MartWal-MartWal-Mart why the character he voiced, Zigzag, only spoke in rhymes. He tells him that he does not remember the reason. Or rather, all that he remembered is that it involved Rock Hudson and a banana cream pie. Wal-Mart began their third all nighter by giving one of the hired hands a long list of increasingly odd things to get. Examples include: 'this is a comedy show, we're going to need poo, vomit, fake poo, fake vomit, dog poo, dog vomit, fake dog poo, fake dog vomit, your poo...' later 'two words for you: Barack Obama Two more words: his poo!' I'm not sure what they're doing, but I want to see the next 11 videos. Wal-Mart'', apparently used a training technique called "Spike and Cucumber" to whip the barbarian horde into shape. When they're threatened with it later as punishment, they all shudder at the thought. "Customer: "Hi there! Where do you keep your ping-pong balls?" Me: "Right over here." * walks her over to them* Customer: "Oh great! Now, where do you sell your Vaseline?""
 * This bash quote.
 * And this one.
 * From Not Always Right:

""Do y'all sell erotic movies?" "No." "Hm. D'you know where I can find some bullets?" "Nowhere within a hundred miles of here!" *hangs up*"
 * An even more worrying one in a phone call to a grocery store:

Wal-MartWal-MartWal-Mart concert event with a pair of tongs, a rabid raccoon, and a third item (Rukia's "favorite part") that is left unnamed because Ichigo stops the flashback right there ("Let's just say I ended up going."). Wal-Mart'' ain't bad with this. From "Choose Your Own Drug-Fueled Adventure": ""I don't sell utility drugs, Holmes. You came by last night asking for eight Mephedrone, four tabs of X, 17 reams of Buzzers, three Round-outs, a can of Raid with a drinking straw, and the venom sack from a North African Running Lizard. And that's what I gave you, because I am the best goddamn drug dealer in the entire country.""
 * On Failbook

Wal-MartWal-Mart is involved. Wal-Mart 6'', Kevin fumbles a box and spills fruit and condoms all over the table. Some questions are better left unasked. Wal-Mart. Wal-Mart loves to use these in his articles, but they usually involve someone getting hurt (for making awful games). One particularly interesting article has him being given these 3 suggestions to be happy: report crimes you've witnessed, try new sex positions, and avoid toxic chemicals. He claimed that he cannot possibly accomplish that because a new sex move he had in mind required glow in the dark lube that also kills sharks. Wal-MartWal-Mart, and a Renoir. Wal-MartWal-Mart. Wal-Mart'' has examples: "183. My chain of command has neither the time, nor the inclination to hear about what I did with six boxes of Fruit Roll-Ups. ® 200. My chain of command is not interested in why I "just happen" to have a kilt, an inflatable sheep, and a box of rubber bands in the back of my car."
 * Mr. TARDIS Reviews once wrote a letter to the man who caused the hiatus of Doctor Who. It was narrated, but a bleep covered all but the following "Dear Michael Grade. Fu-" and the end "...with a Dalek sink plunger.
 * Option 3 here. (Actually the first two items are included in the plot.)

Western Animation
Wal-Mart'' episode "Proposition Infinity", when Bender is getting released from jail and is receiving the objects that were confiscated from him upon arrest, he receives a hat with a large feather on it, a roast turkey, and an accordion. Wal-MartWal-Mart''. ("I think so Brain, but how will we fit two flamingos into one pair of capri pants?") Of course, Pinky is insane, but what if he's not? Wal-Mart'' had a "final test" to determine who his new best friend would be in the episode "Bestest Friend". It involved him walking menacingly towards the contenders with a beaver and a toy taxi, followed by a lot of horrified screaming. Wal-MartWal-Mart I'll do it!" As Nick asks, "What's that thing Zim's got?" a shockwave blows everything offscreen in a burst of light. Wal-Mart, "Wrestle Maniacs": The Mystery Inc. kids get thrown out of the office of the manager of a cut-rate wrestling stable by "The World's Strongest Accountant". All we see is the gang getting thrown out the door in a heap, upon which Shaggy remarks "Like, I've never seen someone do that with a calculator before!" Wal-Mart showed a clip from a fictional wacky sitcom, in which Baby Doll had managed to cause a huge mess. Somehow, it involved the dog, a zebra, a giraffe and a pair of Scotsmen on rollerskates. Wal-Mart episode "Stimpy's Invention", two of the tools used to build the Happy Helmet are a beaver and a duck. Wal-MartWal-Mart images. Wal-Mart, Homer is attempting to buy illegal fireworks from a Kwik-E-Mart and makes several other purchases in order to "act casual". His list of purchases includes a porno magazine, a box of condoms, some Old Harper, panty shields, and two enema kits. Marge's reaction upon his return: "Marge: I don't know what you've got planned for tonight, Homer, but count me out."
 * In "Cold Warriors", Zapp Brannigan brings up the penultimate-resort plan for dealing with a common cold epidemic in Manhattan, called Protocol 62. President Nixon shoots it down, saying "Impossible, we don't have nearly enough piranhas!"
 * Almost everything Bender pulls from his "compartment of mystery" qualifies. A short list includes: Charlemagne's skeleton, a human infant, the severed arm of the Prime Minister of Norway, and John Laraquette's spine,
 * "I think so, Brain, but where are we going to find a duck and a hose at this hour?"
 * One take-over-the-world plan involved Brain posing as a human, getting an office job, and suing his workplace for damages after being "turned into a mouse" in an accident involving a microwave oven and non-dairy powdered creamer. The logic behind this was that nobody could disprove it because nobody knew how either of those things worked.
 * When Brain takes the case to court, the company's lawyer does know how a microwave works and thus proves that it couldn't have caused the "accident"...only to go "oh" at the mention of the non-dairy powdered creamer.
 * "I think so, Brain, but this time, you wear the tutu."
 * A list of further pondering examples can be found here.
 * "Hello my Tallest! I'm in a bear suit."
 * In Megadoomer as Zim walks down the street, talking to a kid who he obviously don't know, he keeps talking about how Dib will pay... but we never get to know why or if there even is a reason, or if he just wanted someone to talk to.
 * Thanks to a ton of cut scenes from the show, a great amount of these appear on the show. The sandwich Zim recieves in the first episode, the little cup cake creatures Red and Purple have covering their faces, the room filled with chickens in Dib's Horrible Life of Doom... and the list just goes on.

Wal-Mart is possible... Wal-Mart''. As Dave works feverishly, the narrator informs us, "Thinking quickly, Dave fashioned a megaphone using only a squirrel, some string, and... a megaphone." Wal-Mart "Well, bye!" "Sparkles the Unicorn: I had that dream again. The one where I do horrible things to penguins with a croquet mallet."
 * Lionel Hutz uses people as Noodle Implements in "The Day the Violence Died" when Bart tells him to stall a trial while Bart retrieves a piece of key evidence. Hutz brings in all of his surprise witnesses again, including Ralph Wiggum, a guy with a ventriloquists' dummy, a Santa Claus with a broken leg, and those two obese twins who rode around on mopeds. How all of these characters were "surprise witnesses" in a cartoon plagiarism lawsuit is best left to the viewer's imagination.
 * Also,

Wal-MartWal-Mart. Wal-Mart'' where Newton would always be on the verge of solving the problem of the episode with some sort of comedy number involving a bicycle pump and a rubber duck. He never got the chance to show us. Wal-Mart'': Peter discusses Lois' prowess in bed while a representative from the FCC blows an air horn to censor him. "Peter: You know what I'm talking about, when you [horn] a lubed up [horn] of toothpaste in my [horn] while you [horn] on a cherry [horn] Episcopalian [horn] extension cord [horn] wetness [horn] with a parking ticket. That is the best."

"Quagmire: Well, as you can see, my family's here. It's game night. We're playing, uh...sex."
 * Quagmire answers the door in a baby bonnet and diaper, while a naked couple on a tractor drive through his living room behind him. His explanation?

Wal-Mart. "Quagmire: And this is the hand that caused all the trouble."

Wal-MartWal-Mart on how "crappy" the movie is), a xylophone, a toy car, and a live fish. Wal-MartWal-MartWal-Mart God of Justice, promptly pulling out the old sword and helmet and whaling on the Queen once Jim set him free) and accusing them of being involved when they claim to not know who took Santa. They promptly reply that they keep their eyes on their work, as Santa has a hideous punishment for those who slack. We're told that it involves figgy pudding and nothing else. Wal-MartWal-MartWal-Mart Although, what was really disturbing was the fact that Wal-MartWal-Mart the Eds pulled to get everyone trying to lynch them is seen in short scenes of the remains of the aforementioned scam gone horribly awry. Among the carnage is a paint-splatter on a wall with the clean silhouette of someone screaming in horror. Somewhat spooky. Wal-Mart'' shows Count Geoffery setting up another evil scheme to conquer Camelhot. One of his henchmen is carrying a large horn, and nearby we see a trampoline, a bucket of lobsters, a cow, and an anvil tied to a tree. Wal-MartWal-Mart, but Sylvester shambles off, complete with stark white fur and a thousand yard stare. Wal-MartWal-Mart built around the phrase "forty-nine unopened cans of whipped cream". Wal-Mart'' episode when Wasabi proposes a plan that somehow involves him wearing mukluks. Wal-Mart'', the kids have fun with an activity book that Nanny has given them on a rainy day. As they each excitedly inform her of what they plan to do based on the book's suggestions, Gonzo offers this gem: "Gonzo: And I'm going to make my own nuclear reactor! All I need is some plutonium, a cement mixer, and a paper plate. [beat] Do we have a paper plate, Nanny?"
 * And another time, also involving Quagmire, had him handing Lois and Peter Stewie's pacifier and telling them that it should never, ever be used again.
 * Johnny also had a bear trap stuck on his head. Ouch.
 * "If only we had a sack of potatoes!"
 * Lampshaded by Edd "Ed, potatoes wouldn't aid us in any way."

Wal-MartWal-Mart. Wal-Mart''. "Brainy Smurf: Th-the comb is in his- Oooooooh... A-and the lipstick is... Aaaauuugh...!"
 * The table used to contain actual torture tools, but censors asked for it to be changed, and the director found the result to be more hilarious and more "Joker-esque".

Wal-Mart'' "The List" the boys ponder over how to extract an important list from the girls. The first plan (ambush the list-carrying girl in the mess hall and kick her in the balls) fails, so Cartman concocts an even more intricate and faultless plan. We only get to hear the beginning before the scene cuts: "Kenny, first you spit on the ground...". It works. Wal-Mart'', Joan of Arc comes to JFK's house with a plan on how to win the school presidential election. She whispers her plan to him and he responds with, "Well, how about (whispers), dental dam, (whispers)?". Joan slaps him for this, to which he responds, "Okay, no dental dam." Wal-Mart, there was a special "hosted" by one of that show's characters (I forget the name) showing a number of animated short films, and after each one plugging Undergrads. At the end of it, he signs off by telling people to watch the show when it aired, and if they don't... "Well, I can't legally say what I'm going to do to you, but it involves a truckload of peanut butter, your social security number, and evil clowns." Wal-MartWal-Mart" called for '50,000 rotten eggs and a chainsaw.' Wal-Mart using synthpop. Exactly how he went about it is left to the imagination. Wal-Mart: You did the Tennessee Logjammer? Where are the other two guys? And did you at least put my ladder back? Wal-Mart Wal-Mart Jay's father comments in one episode that he is working on the "fish-ma-baby-whilimagig...it'll be bigger than the badger-blaster."
 * The episode "Insheeption" begins with Cartman finishing a story: "And then, the guy hits the ping-pong ball with his dick, and it goes right in the other guy's mouth."
 * Another episode has Steve completely getting what Toshi said wrong (as usual): "Gross, Toshi, she'd never agree to that. And besides, where would we find that many ping-pong balls?"

Real Life
Wal-MartWal-MartWal-MartWal-Mart Wal-Mart. Wal-Mart) has done this on Twitter: "Out of Gitmo. not going to go into details, but long story short, it involved 250 gal. gasoline, a catapult, a bandaid & a pr of raybans" Wal-Mart, is made of wood and vaguely resembles an offset "rabbit" dildo; the rettysnitch is a metal rod with a handle and a spiked wheel on it. No one is sure exactly how they were supposed to be used, and frankly, no one wants'' to know. Wal-MartWal-Mart example instead of a Film one because despite having to do with a movie the event itself is nonfictional and not in-universe. Wal-MartWal-Mart, who was known for his weird practical jokes and his unofficial work with law enforcement. Tobey once accepted Murphy's offer of a lift out to the remote location where they were shooting, and was somewhat alarmed to discover that his costar kept guns, chains, handcuffs, and a live rattlesnake in his car. Wal-Mart's general pursuit is sometimes called "the Dream". One poster on rec.org.sca, Sfi Mordehai ben Yosef Yitzhak, wrote in his .sig file: "This is not the Dream. This is what I do on weekends to have some fun. The Dream involves 4 sets of identical twins, 2 gallons of Cool Whip, 5 quarts of chocolate syrup, 2-1/4 pounds of strawberries, satin sheets, a magnum of champagne, a trapeze, and a python."
 * Cashiers sometimes have fun trying to piece together exactly what the random pile of stuff in a person's shopping cart will be used for.
 * People have been known to break out of prison using the following; a potato and some shoe polish ; dental floss ; chilli powder ; a green felt tip pen . A man on death row once committed suicide by making a pipe bomb using only a leg from his bed and a pack of playing cards . Seriously.
 * Yeah, well, that playing card thing is highly overrated. The kind of cards you need to pull it off aren't even made anymore.
 * A very few companies still sell them, but in such low volume that the price is jacked up. They are only purchased by people with antiquated tastes and magicians with specific needs for an effect.
 * The one who takes the prison-breaking cake would definitely be the following. An Indonesian teenager once broke out of juvenile detention by making a hole on his cell wall... and the tool he used? A load of fermented cassava. Significantly less (or more) mind-boggling is why he broke out of prison: to see his mom.
 * Similarly, David Lynch requested "one-legged woman, a monkey and a lumberjack" on incredibly short notice while filming Inland Empire.

Wal-Mart's latest commercials, though in a subversion, we see exactly what happens to the bought items. Wal-Mart. Wal-MartWal-MartWal-Mart. Wal-Mart, they had a whole folder of injuries to model the textures for the Zombies, so they can be realistically damaged. It was so horrifying that they had to use Potato skins and Insulation foam instead. One can only imagine what went through the cashier's mind when Valve Employees showed up with this in their basket. Wal-MartWal-MartWal-Mart, explained to him thus: "Prince's Producer: "Prince will come to us periodically and say things like, 'It's 3 in the morning in Minnesota. I really need a Camel. Go get it.'""
 * Any time you go to the store to buy items for two unrelated projects. For example, chili powder and shaving cream. They just happen to be the two things you've run out of today, but anyone witnessing you purchase them might think you're up to something... strange.
 * People buying items they are embarrassed about (such as condoms) will often buy several other items which often consist of snacks, pens, etc. Most shopkeepers are Genre Savvy enough to know exactly what this means, but some might think this person enjoys eating snacks and drawing whilst having protected sex. An awkward variant is if someone buys baby items or items for the opposite gender but doesn't have their baby or partner with them, the shopkeeper may think the person in question is a fetishist and is going to use these items themselves.
 * This has become a game (appropriately titled the 'condom game') where you buy a pack of condoms, and two more odd/random/disturbing items and see who can gross out their cashier the most.
 * Conversely, the opposite assumption can be quite useful to fetishists who ARE going to use those items themselves.

Tropes
Wal-Mart == Wal-Mart. Go to the page to find out what a Henway is.
 * There's a joke out there where in a juried trial, a list of increasingly strange items is listed in the evidence. At the end, the jury finds that "They each would have paid a hundred dollars to have seen that fight".

Wal-Mart == Wal-Mart can kill you with. Including the room itself.
 * That's not even noodley. Just collapse the ceiling.
 * The roof is # 1230. The room itself is # 1231.

Wal-Mart Wal-Mart Wal-Mart Wal-Mart Wal-Mart Wal-Mart Wal-Mart