Our Lawyers Advised This Trope



""Based on the advice of our lawyers, we've never heard of a musical based on the life of Eva Peron""

- The Simpsons: "The President Wore Pearls"

In the interests of full disclosure, we are describing Our Lawyers Advised This Trope here.

Pursuant to the avoidance of unnecessary civil and criminal litigation, a variety of disclaimers, notices, and even changes to the actual work, are present in modern fiction, usually in the packaging of said works, before the beginning if applicable, or during the opening or ending credits if applicable.

These may be mandated with threats of legal actions by government bodies or could be attempts by the well advised creators to reduce their vulnerability to civil litigation from civilian citizens. Please note that these threats may or may not be actually true, considering the number of people who do exactly the opposite of this disclaimer and still roam the streets at night, but we are heavily implying that you follow them anyway.

Parodies of the trope may, or may not, have some overlap with Suspiciously Specific Denial.

See separate document, heretofore referred to as a Sub-Trope, called This Is a Work of Fiction, for instances relating to said notice.

Our lawyers recommend you see also Content Warnings, No Animals Were Harmed, Side Effects Include.

Below are, to the degree and/or extent which is so far known to us, et alii our lawyers, Straight Examples:

Anime and Manga
"Ichika: The video, audio, packaging, and all contents of this work are the property of the copyright holders. The only rights granted to you are for personal viewing within your own household. Manatsu: It says, “in your household,” right? So if you live alone, then that’s just one person. Ichika: Any other uses, for example secondary works, modification, screenings, broadcast, or cable broadcasting, cause the copyright holders serious damages, and is strictly prohibited by law. Manatsu: But if you’ve got like a huge family, and a ton of them all get together during New Year’s or Obon, and you show it to your family of more than like, 100 people... That’s basically a screening, right? I wonder how that would work? Ichika: Eh... Ehh?"
 * The Excel Saga DVDs from ADV Films actually add in-series jokes to the FBI warning at the beginning of the disc. [[media:excel-warning.png|Here's the screenshot]]; hopefully All The Tropes won't be prosecuted under the "Don't Toucha My Toot-Toot Pact" for posting this...
 * The North American release of Full Metal Panic! does something similar, with a different character voicing over the FBI warning at the beginning of each disc. The FBI has never been cuter than when advocated by Tessa Testarossa. "You wouldn't want me to have to put a cruise missile down your chimney, would you?"
 * Or scarier when advocated by Gauron: "Look, I'm a businessman, and digital piracy is bad for business. So don't do it, or else you and I might have to have some words in the future, got it friend?"
 * The Uta Kata DVDs also feature disclaimers narrated by the main characters, who, in this example, discuss the finer points of the message.


 * The Viz dubs of the Ranma ½ motion pictures distributed on VHS in the early 1990s ended with very... idiosyncratic piracy warnings, done in-character by the voice talent over an appropriate still image. One of the most memorable was Nabiki, whose warning was delivered in a deadpan tongue-in-cheek manner over an image of her taking Marilyn Monroe's place in the famous "Diamonds Are a Girl's Best Friend" musical number.  Pink gown and all.

Comic Books
""So's we don't get sued, I just wanna remind all you knee-jerk fucks out there that this is a work of parody. Doogie doesn't really make porn ... not that I know of anyway. And Fred Rogers is probably a saint of a guy. Federal Wildlife Marshals aren't nearly as stupid as they're portrayed here, and John Hughes has never led anyone to believe that Shermer really exists. And I never ... NEVER ... jerked no guys off. Snoogans.""
 * The final page of The View Askewniverse comic Chasing Dogma shows Jay uttering the following disclaimer:

Film

 * Dr. Strangelove and Fail Safe both contain notices stating that, according to the US Air Force, the events of the films could never take place. Given that both movies are about accidental nuclear war, this was probably reassuring to the audience.
 * In a variation with a dash of Political Correctness Gone Mad, the Mr. Magoo film featured a disclaimer saying that it was "not intended as an accurate portrayal of blindness or poor eyesight." To which Roger Ebert said: "I think we should stage an international search to find one single person who thinks the film is intended as such a portrayal, and introduce that person to the author of the disclaimer, as they will have a lot in common, including complete detachment from reality."
 * The Hungarian comedy-drama Kontroll, about a group of eccentric ticket inspectors on the Budapest Metro, started with a stiff address by a member of the Metro management complimenting the director's skill but warning people not to take it as an accurate depiction of the system.
 * Borat: "selling piratings of this moviedisc will result in punishment by crushing"
 * The Fight Club DVD had a warning from Tyler Durden. Though if you make the effort to freeze-frame the warning so you can read it, it tells you
 * The Ring had noises in the background during the FBI warning.
 * There was a video montage of male-male kissing scenes from Hollywood films that made the rounds a few years back, which came with a disclaimer along the lines of "If you find this material offensive, we suggest you watch it over and over until you become desensitized."
 * Humorously done in Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film for Theaters. The opening includes a little old-time routine about theater etiquette before Mastodon takes over to add on to said etiquette before finishing with warning about how the movie was copyrighted by Time Warner, video taping it would result in punishment from Satan and selling it on eBay will result in your wife being torn in half

Literature
""Another important fact we just now remembered is that during the colonial era women and minority groups were making many contributions, which we are certain that they will continue to do at regularly spaced intervals throughout the course of the book.""
 * In The Fifth Elephant, the emergency signal flare rockets for the clacks tower have the warning "Do Not Place In Mouth".
 * Dave Barry sent this up in Dave Barry Slept Here, in which the text is interrupted early on by an advisement to include more information about the accomplishments of women and minorities, or else "this book will not be approved for purchase by public school systems in absolutely vast quantities." Afterward, the narrator states:


 * Accordingly, about once a chapter thereafter he inserts a sentence about "all the enormous contributions by women and minority groups, despite having the same legal rights as gravel."
 * The Foundation books take care to point out that the quotations from the Enyclopedia Galactica are reproduced with the permission of the Encylopedia's (fictional) publishing company.
 * The Author's Foreword in The Pale King is rife with this. David Foster Wallace even uses his footnotes to apologize for the abundance of apparently necessary legal writing.

Live-Action TV
""You'll notice more obscenity than we usually use. That's not just because it's on Showtime, and we want to get some attention. It's also a legal matter. If one calls people liars and quacks, one can be sued and lose a lot of one's money. But "motherfuckers" and "assholes" is pretty safe. If we said it was all scams, we could also be in trouble. But BULLSHIT, oddly, is safe. So forgive all the bullshit language. We're trying to talk about the truth without spending the rest of our lives in court because of litigious motherfuckers!""
 * Penn & Teller: Bullshit!:

"Warning: The two women you are about to see have escaped from an insane asylum. Do not try to imitate their actions."
 * Please, don't try anything you're about to see at home. (Ever!)
 * We're what you call "experts".
 * It's safer that way.
 * When Laverne and Shirley was shown in certain countries, this disclaimer, or something similar to it, was shown before every episode.

""Or she could kill me and make it look like suicide!"
 * Satirical news quiz Have I Got News for You has a habit of adding "...allegedly" after saying anything that could get them sued.
 * Despite the fact the players know that it has no legal effect whatsoever, and have commented on it.
 * And they were actually charged with contempt of court and fined for the joke, "The BBC are in fact cracking down on references to Ian and Kevin Maxwell just in case programme-makers appear biased in their treatment of these two heartless, scheming bastards." The heartless scheming bastards' trial was about to start, and pointing out on television that they're heartless scheming bastards risks prejudicing the jury. There's footage from the taping of Ian Hislop expressing concern over leaving the joke in, but leave it in they did.
 * Never Mind the Buzzcocks had the host Simon Amstel speculate with Noel Fielding about how Courtney Love would beat the stuffing out of Amstel.

"The show you are about to watch is a news parody. Its stories are not fact checked. Its reporters are not journalists. And its opinions are not fully thought through."
 * Immediately captioned by the Producers with a disclaimer "Simon Amstel is definetely wrong."
 * DVDs by Blue Rhino, including Beast Wars and Mystery Science Theater 3000, have a pen drawing glasses and a mustache over J. Edgar Hoover's face during the FBI Warning. They also did this on VHS tapes as early as the '90s.
 * The Daily Show, Global Edition (which, in some countries, is shown on 24-hour news networks):


 * This Hour Has 22 Minutes is a satirical examination of daily events. Some viewers may not share this sense of humour.
 * Often followed by a satirical "Warning!" based on an examination of daily events.
 * Happens all the time on 10 O'Clock Live with Jimmy Carr's segments. Particularly funny because it is live and you almost hear the pain of the show's lawyers and producers as they shout in Carr's earpiece to clear up any "misinterpretation" that might have arisen with his completely innocent monologues.

Meta

 * Don't Try This At Home (rarely required, but used to stave off lawsuits).
 * Do Not Attempt is similar
 * Rattling Off Legal
 * Unreadable Disclaimer
 * This Is a Work of Fiction
 * Yes but What Does Zataproximetacine DO
 * Offer Void in Nebraska
 * Product Displacement

Music

 * "Our Lawyer Made Us Change the Name of This Song So We Wouldn't Get Sued".
 * Technically a subversive parody since their lawyers really did make them change the name of the song. (From "My Name is David Ruffin...and These are The Temptations.")
 * The Offspring has a very sarcastic track on Ixnay On the Hombre titled "Disclaimer", as seen on the Quotes page.

Radio
""It may be that some listeners will find some parts of this program rather badly written and incompetently performed.""
 * Stephen Fry used to have a radio show called Saturday Night Fry. From the intro to the first episode:

"1. All questions used on Whad'Ya Know have been painstakingly researched, although the answers have not. Ambiguous, misleading, or poorly worded questions are par for the course. Listeners who are sticklers for the truth should get their own shows. (The second disclaimer is a Couch Gag.) 3. Persons employed by the International House of Radio or its member stations are lucky to be working at all, let along tying up the office phones trying to play the quiz. Listeners who have won recently should sit on their hands and let someone else have a chance for a change. 4. All opinions expressed on Whad'Ya Know are well-reasoned and insightful. Needless to say, they are not those of the International House of Radio, its member stations, or lackeys. Anyone who says otherwise is itching for a fight."
 * Before beginning the quiz portion of Whad'Ya Know?, host Michael Feldman always calls for a volunteer from the audience to read The Four Disclaimers:

Card Games
"Our lawyers say no matter how funny it would be, we can't encourage players to eat the cards. Hear that? Whatever you do, don't eat the delicious cards."
 * James Ernest's Totally Renamed Spy Game. I imagine you can guess whose name needed changing.
 * Magic: The Gathering joke sets like Unhinged occasionally uses this for humorous flavor texts. For example:

Tabletop RPG
"(Legal Notice: The Holmes-1 Detection Automaton is neither designed nor meant to resemble nor suggest to the public in any way the likeness or mannerisms of Mr Holmes of Baker Street.)"
 * The Steam-Tech GURPS supplement includes a robot detective called the Holmes-1, which sucks evidence into an internal storage facility through a Meerschaum pipe, is protected from the elements with an Inverness cape and deerstalker hat, and has a vocabulary that rather overuses the word "elementary". The advertising copy that introduces it concludes:

Theatre

 * The prologue and Opening Chorus of the musical Louisiana Purchase.

Video Games

 * Nintendo's safety warnings on bootup of the Wii and DS systems.
 * With the newest firmware, the PlayStation Portable now has a similar warning on bootup of games on the Memory Stick. Dammit.
 * And now the Play Station 3. Damn lawyers.
 * Adverts for 6th-gen and earlier video game titles would often feature flashy rendered visuals which were much more impressive than the consoles could produce, resulting in the standard disclaimer, "Not representative of in-game graphics" (or alternately "Not actual gameplay"). Since this became the accepted norm, it is amusing to note that publishers often have an 'anti-disclaimer' on 7th-gen titles to let us know that now the games actually do look that good.
 * Of course still shown straight occasionally to clear up any confusions over adverts only showing cut-scenes and not the actual game-play.
 * Cannon Fodder: "This game is not endorsed in any way by the Royal British Leagion" [sic]

Web Animation

 * Red vs. Blue made fun of those too. For the season one disc, the sign read something to the lines of "do not steal this disc, but you already know this. So don't eat it or throw it at your sister either." Then it switched to Spanish, which was the same as English, but with accent marks placed at random. One of the other seasons' DVDs' Spanish FBI warning had one sentence of Spanish followed by something like "This is basically the message above only in Spanish. To be honest, we only took one year of Spanish so the only phrases we know are 'Happy birthday!' and 'My cousin likes to walk on the beach.'"
 * The Homestar Runner DVDs have characters showing up during the FBI warning and commenting (for example, Homestar pops up during one warning and declares it "Bowwwwinnnngggg!", while in another Coach Z interprets it as a rap song).

Web Original
"The goatse.cx lawyer has informed us that we need a warning! So.. if you are under the age of 18 or find this photograph offensive, please don't look at it. Thank you!"
 * A straight example written as a parody from "Dave does the Blog" notes 'The views expressed by me on this weblog are mine alone and do not necessarily reflect the views of my employer, my church, my party, my candidate, my community, my wife, my friends, or, on occasion, myself.'
 * Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog has an 'ELE' warning on the DVD.
 * The warning on the New Kids on the Rock DVD admits that they really have no way of knowing whether you do any of the things they're warning you against.
 * On the infamous shock site goatse the following text was displayed above hello.jpg:

"I don't mind if you want to quote a few items from my list of your site. But please do not copy the list in it's entirety."
 * Skippy's List has examples:


 * In this video, where MrRhexx outlines the Dungeons and Dragons version of the succubus, he feels a need to give a disclaimer to tell viewers succubi are not real. It seems there are indeed people who believe they are.

Western Animation
""Beavis & Butt-Head are not role models. They're not even human; they're cartoons. Some of the things they do would cause a person to get hurt, expelled, arrested, possibly deported. So to put it another way: Don't Try This At Home." This was the result of kids who watch the show try to emulate the duo's antics, namely Beavis' "Fire! Fire!""
 * MTV's Celebrity Deathmatch opened with a standard disclaimer about celebrity voices being impersonated, blah blah blah...then added at the bottom in large letters, "BESIDES, IT'S ONLY CLAY!"
 * From season three onwards of Beavis and Butthead:

""All characters and events in this show --even those based on real people-- are entirely fictional. All celebrity voices are impersonated ... poorly. The following program contains coarse language and due to its content it should not be viewed by anyone.""
 * South Park's opening disclaimer:

"On the advice of our lawyers we swear we have never heard of a musical based on the life of Eva Peron."
 * Ironically, some networks have broadcast it with a genuine disclaimer either before or instead of the joke one.
 * On one of the Futurama DVDs, an alien-language FBI warning screen displays after the usual one.
 * In the Invader Zim episode "FBI Warning of Doom", the FBI Warning Of Doom! on a rented DVD makes Zim believe he's being watched by the FBI.
 * An episode of The Simpsons that was based on the musical Evita had the following disclaimer at the end:


 * In another episode, an Itchy and Scratchy cartoon is followed by the warning "The preceding cartoon contained scenes of graphic violence and should not have been watched by young children".
 * From The Twisted Tales of Felix the Cat, the episode "Night Drop": "Do not copy this tape, or we will find you and flick your ear."

Real Life
"You also agree that you will not use these products for any purposes prohibited by United States law, including, without limitation, the development, design, manufacture or production of nuclear, chemical or biological weapons. You further acknowledge that the software is not intended or suitable for use in situations or environments where the failure of, or errors or inaccuracies in the content, data or information provided by, the software could lead to death, personal injury, or severe physical or environmental damage, including without limitation the operation of nuclear facilities, aircraft navigation or communication systems, air traffic control, life support or weapons systems."
 * Copyright and trademark notices in pretty much all commercially available fiction.
 * It was a virtual automatic acknowledgement of how bad a movie was, around the 1980s, that the intensity of the wording of the copyright notice was inversely proportional to how likely it was someone would pirate it. Until the use of the Interpol notices became almost universal on movies, the rare movie that had one was probably so awful that you didn't even need to watch the movie to know how bad it was.
 * A Japanese government website circa 2006 had a copyright notice in English with the words "All Rights Reserved." This is a notice for obtaining protection under the Buenos Aires' Convention, to which Japan is not a party. The whole use of the phrase was absolutely meaningless because both Japan and every member of the Buenos Aires' Convention is a member of the Berne Convention, which doesn't require copyright notices in the first place.
 * The "FBI Warning" found in countless home video formats over the years. They now also appear on CD cases because of the whole Napster/MP3 fiasco.
 * Speaking of the FBI, the X-Files credits included the sentence "This production has not been approved, endorsed or authorized by the Federal Bureau of Investigation."
 * The Interpol warning. Just like the FBI warning, but international and frequently multilingual.
 * "If you find yourself traumatized by what you've seen here, call 555-xxxx"
 * "Professional driver on closed course"
 * Warning: The beverage you're about to enjoy is extremely hot.
 * Anything required by the Comics Code, MPAA rating system, ESRB, Woman's Christian Temperance Union rules, or pretty much any Censorship Bureau.
 * Anything required by the FCC, an American agency with broad scope. One must be very careful here due to the lack of a statute of limitations, as evidenced by a recent obscenity charge caused by a mid-1990s NYPD Blue episode.
 * "The opinions expressed in the following (episode, speech) do not necessarily represent those of this station."
 * "This copyrighted telecast is presented by the authority of the office of the commisioner of [insert major sport here or sporting organization here], and may not be retransmitted in any form, or have its facts disseminated without express written consent".
 * The licenses for a lot of software, even including web browsers and iTunes, include warnings like


 * SURGEON-GENERAL'S WARNING: Smoking is a really bad idea and it causes lung cancer among other ailments.
 * In Canada, those labels have been mandated by the courts, not advised by the tobacco company lawyers; and they come with gruesome pictures, to boot.
 * Also in Australia too, and now in plain packets.
 * A relatively new one in the US for any Spice Rack Panacea: "These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, prevent, treat, or cure any disease."

In the name of the 'All The Tropes Ltd.' Legal Department, we like to recall that the items contained in the following section are Not Straight Examples of the page's topic, or anything resembling it:

Film

 * Trinity and Beyond: The Atomic Bomb Movie, being made up of footage of American nuclear tests, has an interesting version of this: "No animals were harmed in the making of this movie. Some goats, pigs, and sheep were nuked in the making of the original films."
 * The film version of How To Eat Fried Worms had the disclaimer, "No worms were harmed during the making of this film." Then it cut to the part where a worm placed in a microwave to heat exploded and added, "Including this one."
 * Fido: "No zombies were harmed during the making of this film."

Literature

 * No Bed For Bacon by Caryl Brahms and S. J. Simon — which is deliberately set in The Theme Park Version of Elizabethan England — has the disclaimer "Warning to Scholars: This book is fundamentally unsound."

Live-Action TV
"Warning: This show contains adult humor, strong language, random acts of violence, shocking images, and scenes of an sexually explicit nature between humans and puppets, which some viewers may find offensive."
 * Also parodied in Garth Marenghi's Darkplace with the line "I do not believe that any form of life, be it human, animal, or plant, should be hurt in the making of a television programme. So I personally feel really bad about that cat we killed."
 * The MTV show Fur TV started each episode with an overly long viewer warning. It changed every episode too, so it doubled as a sneak preview.

"Adam: There's women out there going, "Oh, I wish I was that piece of tape right now!" Jamie: Ya think? Adam: I'm sure of it. [looking at the camera] Raise your hand. Yeah, you! Jamie: Gimme a break. Rob Lee: The producers of MythBusters are not responsible for any marital issues resulting from raised arms."
 * In one episode of Insomniac with Dave Attell, Dave spends some time with some government employees tasked with hunting an invasive rodent species with airsoft rifles to control their population. At the conclusion of the segment, he informs the camera that "a lot of animals were harmed in the making of this program".
 * Parodied in an episode of Las Vegas in which Jean-Claude Van Damme is killed in a rooftop motorcycle movie stunt gone wrong. According to the credits, "No Jean-Claude Van Dammes were killed in the making of this episode".
 * The MythBusters has had a few gags of this nature throughout the series, mixed in with their much more serious warnings not to try what they do on the show. One memorable one from Lead Balloon involves Adam discussing the sex appeal of Jamie's walrus mustache, while they're dissipating static electricity from adhesive tape on their facial hair.

Meta

 * The Mattress Tag Gag isn't possible, because the tags say "Under penalty of law, this tag not to be removed except by the consumer." So, you're okay with ripping it off. The salesman, on the other hand...

Video Games
"Qwark Enterprises is not responsible for sprains, broken bones, snapped tendons, bruised egos or accidental death incurred while taking the challenge."
 * "Please keep your hands and feet in the car at all times, because there are tiny asteroids traveling at incredible speed hurtling through space. Keeping your hands and feet in the car won't prevent you from being hit, but our lawyers tell us we have to say it anyway."
 * Parodied in the credits of the original Spyro the Dragon games. "No sheep were harmed in the production of this game."
 * Later repeated in the second Ratchet and Clank game, which was made by the same developers. It also adds, "Except for one. Bastard had it coming to him."
 * Qwark featured one or two of these at the end of his own advertisements in the first game, too.


 * And also parodied at the end of a campaign in Left 4 Dead, in which case it is used to show the body count.
 * Pretty much every second-generation Sierra game starts with an appeal to please not make illegal copies because they worked hard on creating this game. They went for the moral angle instead of the legal one. Several of those games follow up with something like "...by the way, the game is unplayable without the information contained in the manual. It's not just the law, it's a good idea!" Confusingly, this follow up was actually false in some games, that were perfectly playable without the manual.

Web Original

 * Team Four Star's Dragon Ball Abridged has this to say right before a young Gohan gets kicked by Raditz: "We here at Team Four Star do not condone child violence... we do, however, find it hilarious."
 * Also, before their blooper reels (which typically contain large amounts of swearing), there is the disclaimer: "Warning. The following contains language unsuitable for minors. If you are under the age of 18 and have not heard the word "fuck" before... well, ya have now."
 * Barking Crayon predicts further development of safety warnings.

Western Animation
"Homer: Aw, why won't anyone give me an award? Lisa: You won a Grammy! Homer: I meant an award that's worth winning! Disclaimer Text: Legal disclaimer: Mr. Simpsons' opinions do not reflect those of the producers, who don't consider the Grammy an award at all."
 * Parodied in The Simpsons too, with "No dogs were harmed during the production of this episode. A cat threw up and somebody shot a duck, but that's it."
 * In the episode "The Mansion Family":


 * The bonus short on the Ratatouille DVD ended with a parody disclaimer, with warnings about rat interaction varying from the reasonable (rat interaction can cause disease) to the outlandishly slanderous. (claims that rat interaction can lead to mutilation, and that all right-minded people know rats caused the Black Plague). Remy is offended, and protests loudly while trying to stop the disclaimer.

Real Life

 * No Animals Were Harmed is for publicity reasons, not legal reasons. It's a certification from the American Humane Society.
 * This actually has historical reasons for existing, though. According to The Other Wiki, the AHA disclaimer was brought on by controversy about a 1939 movie named Jessie James, in which a blindfolded horse was ridden off a cliff to its death. (Needless to say, said movie was not following the AHA guidelines.)

Our lawyers, who consequently took action, persisted, that both A Little From Column A, and A Little From Column B shall be displayed in this article, naturally in a fair and comprehensive ratio:

Film
"Disclaimer: 1) a renunciation of any claim to or connection with; 2) disavowal; 3) a statement made to save one's own ass; 4) a foresaid word for not being blamed later. Though it'll go without saying ten minutes or so into these proceedings, View Askew would like to state that this film is from start to finish a work of comedic fantasy, not to be taken seriously. To insist that any of what follows is incendiary or inflammatory is to miss our intention and pass undue judgment; and passing judgment is reserved for God and God alone (this goes for you film critics too... just kidding). So please before you think about hurting someone over this trifle of a film, remember: even God has a sense of humor. Just look at the Platypus. Thank you and enjoy the show. P.S. We sincerely apologize to all Platypus enthusiasts out there who are offended by that thoughtless comment about Platypi. We at View Askew respect the noble Platypus, and it is not our intention to slight these stupid creatures in any way. Thank you again and enjoy the show."
 * From Kevin Smith's film Dogma, the following disclaimer ... over four separate screens ...

"Any unauthorized exhibition, distribution or copying of this film or any part thereof [including soundtrack] is an infringement of the relevant copyright and will subject the infringer to severe civil and criminal prosecution as well as a midnight call from the Driller-Killer."
 * At the end of the Phantasm films (at least, from the second one onward), there is the standard copyright disclaimer... followed by the phrase "violators will face severe civil and criminal penalties and the wrath of the Tall Man."
 * Airplane! used a standard disclaimer/copyright notice... except that it added "So There" at the very end.
 * Similar to Airplane!, The Informant has this: "While this motion picture is based on real events, certain incidents and characters are composites, and dialog has been dramatized. So there."
 * This from Slumber Party Massacre II:

Literature
"This Is a Work of Fiction. All the characters and events portrayed in this book are fictional, and any resemblance to real people or incidents is purely coincidental. This book and series has no connection to reality. Any attempt by the reader to replicate any scene in this series it to be taken at the reader's own risk. For that matter, most of the actions of the main character are illegal under U.S. and international law as well as most of the stricter religions in the world. There is no Valley of the Keldara. Heck, there is no Kildar. And the idea of some Scots and Vikings getting together to raid the Byzantine Empire is beyond ludicrous. The islands described in a previous book do not exist. Entire regions described in these books do not exist. Any attempt to learn anything from these books is disrecommended by the author, the publisher and the author's mother who wishes to state that he was a very nice boy and she doesn't know what went wrong."
 * The actual disclaimer of the hardcover edition of Kildar by John Ringo:

"The author happens to harbor no ill will against a certain country that is integral to the plot. I was limited to choosing a dictatorship reachable by domestic flight. So, to those from that country, please don't abduct me. On the other hand, if I disappear or die in an accident--or if there's a mysterious fire at Fujimi Books--you readers know where to start the investigation."
 * Shouji Gatou gives one of these at the end of the first Full Metal Panic!! novel, on his use of the country of North Korea

Live-Action TV
"If you have been affected by the issues in that picture phone the National Buzzsaw Incident Hotline on 0808-1dehblehdeh"
 * Charlie Brooker's Screenwipe spoofed the "If you're traumatized call 555-xxxx" variation few times on the course of the show. The following example comes from the episode about news coverage.

"Michael:I'm here for Motherboy. Desk Clerk:You realize that's not the band. Narrator:Motherboy was also the name of a heavy metal band that rocked pretty hard throughout the seventies. We are legally obligated to make this distinction."
 * With OFCOM's strict rules about keeping opinions separate from news, editorial pieces are prefixed with Charlie Brooker saying "Remember, these are his views, not facts". One particularly controversial one, about media influence in Parliament, had Charlie Brooker repeating this over a stern red card reading "Viewer information hastily added following legal advice" for the best part of 30 seconds.
 * The Arrested Development episode "Motherboy XXX" gave us this gem when Michael went to the hotel for the Motherboy pageant:

Meta

 * I Do Not Own

Music

 * Ani DiFranco's albums contain the notice "Unauthorized duplication, while sometimes necessary, is never as good as the real thing."
 * 2 Live Crew's albums featured the warning "Unlawful duplication will get you fuck up by the Ghetto Style DJs." [sic]

Tabletop Games

 * White Wolf tabletop RPG books mostly contain some serious though tongue-in-cheek examples. Examples from Vampire: The Masquerade books usually start with the five words "You are not a vampire." and end with a suggestion that if you want to carry out various inhuman acts you should seek counseling and leave roleplayers to get on with their games. One Exalted disclaimer helpfully advises players that "You should not hit your friends or loved ones with swords."

'''Last not least, our Legal Dept. might like to inform you, that none of the promises, regulations or compilations of tropes of any kind, that were mentioned above, are valid, or should be taken seriously. We would like to apologize in advance for any errors and serious complications, regarding property, health, or sanity.'''