Gene Roddenberry's Andromeda/Funny

"Tyr: (coldly courteous) What would you like, Jaguar?
 * A few from Charlemagne Bolivar, a Nietzchean (played by James Marsters) whose pride has some history with Tyr's, all of it bad.

Charlemagne: The usual: hundreds of grandchildren, utter domination of known space, and the pleasure of hearing that all my enemies have died in terrible, highly improbable accidents that cannot be connected to me. And you?

Tyr: (laughing, despite himself) ... The usual."

"Charlemagne: There are at least three good reasons you shouldn't let the Sabra-Jaguar Pride join your new Commonwealth: we are renowned for our treachery; we are at war with the Drago-Kazov Pride; and we will constantly remind you of your genetic inferiority. Now, here's the upside: we are renowned for our treachery; we are at war with the Drago-Kazov Pride; and, did I mention, we command the third-largest fleet in the known worlds."
 * To Dylan, listing the reasons why he should (or shouldn't) have them as his allies:

"Dylan: And, in the case of an emergency, the ship can be piloted from the gunnery nose.
 * Shortly before that, while Dylan is proudly showing off the Andromeda to his guests:

Charlemagne: Emergency? You mean in the event that the Command Deck crew is reduced to a fine red mist and splattered across the walls in a bloody mural?

Dylan: That would qualify, yes.

Höhne: Fascinating! And do such emergencies arise with a degree of frequency, or are they a rare occurrence?"

"Tyr: "I can usually spot a planet. They're large, I have good eyes.""
 * In the episode "A Rose In The Ashes", the gang exits slipstream where they thought they'd find a planet, but it turns out it's not there.

"Rommie: We're not the droids you're looking for.
 * In "Chaos and the Stillness of It" Rommie and Doyle unexpectely run into some mooks:

Doyle: What is that?

Rommie: I don't know but it didn't work!

Cue all-out brawl."