Double Entendre

""If I told you you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?""

- Benny Hill, Groucho Marx, Mel Brooks, John Cleese, Black Mage and many others

One of the fundamental types of verbal gag in comedic television, especially the Sit Com.

A Double Entendre is a word or phrase which was meant to be taken in two different ways. Archetypically, one meaning is obvious, literal, and innocent. The other has a usually taboo or sexual Subtext.

The Double Entendre's popularity in comedy stems from the fact that if you don't get it, you won't realize something dirty just happened. As a result, clever use of a Double Entendre can keep a show "family-friendly" by allowing children to appreciate the joke on one (non-sexual) level while adults enjoy it on another level.

On the other hand, if the Double Entendre fails to be funny on the obvious level, it can result in a show which is "safe" for broadcast in family time slots but which younger viewers do not enjoy. In other words, the joke has to work well both ways.

British comedy is especially fond of the device, especially when the joke "works" on both levels. The Double Entendre predates television, of course. Shakespeare was very fond of this device as well. "Hamlet: Do you think I meant Country Matters? What, shall I lie my head upon your lap?"

When the viewer is specifically led toward the sexual meaning until The Reveal, this is an Innocent Innuendo. When the non-sexual meaning is perfectly clear but the innuendos continue, it's Does This Remind You of Anything?. When the non-sexual meaning doesn't make any sense, this can constitute an Unusual Euphemism. When the sexual meaning has been lost due to language change, it's Get Thee to A Nunnery.

If someone makes a Double Entendre, but the recipient fails to see it as anything other than a literal statement, it becomes Entendre Failure. If someone makes a perfectly innocent statement that others interpret as a Double Entendre anyway, it becomes an Un Entendre. Extreme cases of double-entendre interpretation can lead to Freud Was Right.

Sometimes lampshaded with a wink, a nudge, and/or "if you know what I mean". See also Getting Crap Past the Radar. May lead to someone saying "Heh heh, you said [x]..." or "That's What She Said".

Of course, as is obvious from many of the examples below, certain ...frustrations will lead some viewers to interpret anything as a double entendre.

Subtrope of Double Meaning.

Advertising
"Tentacle Grape is the brainchild of Dekker Dreyer and his skilled team of grapists. Each bottle of this delicious carbonated grape drink is crafted with care... and a slight feeling of breathless anticipation. As Tentacle Grape slides smoothly down your throat you'll feel refreshed and full.
 * Nando's, a South African chicken restaurant franchise that has a penchant for putting out controversial ads, covered this recently by airing a commercial for a fake yet somewhat similar restaurant, only to add a disclaimer at the end that shows the logos of the restaurants, a rooster in both cases, side by side, so Nando's could argue that their cock was bigger than theirs.
 * Take a look. It's Stan Freberg (Creator)-level good.
 * A UK energy conservation advert, paraphrased: "When cooking, use only enough water to cover your vegetables. The same applies when having a bath." "Meat and two veg" is a jocular British euphemism for, well, you can guess.
 * Lucky Strike cigarettes had a slogan old comedies loved to quote: "So round, so firm, so fully packed."
 * Vince Offer does this in the Slap Chop commercial (intentionally; he used to be a comedian). When demonstrating how to chop up almonds, etc., "You're gonna love my nuts."
 * Also, if you interpret 'slap' as 'slapping your junk', the entire commercial is possibly more hilarious than normal. "Slap your troubles away."
 * The Chup-a-Chups lollipop company had "The Joy of Sucking" before they replaced it with "Life Less Serious".
 * This commercial for Axe body spray.
 * From the Internet, we have the epic Hentai-themed Tentacle Grape, which... well, I'll quote the About page here:

Each 12oz bottle of Tentacle Grape comes packed full of flavor in a unique glass collector's bottle.

Tentacle Grape is now available... so WATCH OUT! You gonna get GRAPED!"

"Toaster: Scott, I want you to do something.
 * This is made even funnier by the advertiser's name: Yuri Lowenthal.
 * Nutty's Bar in Sioux Falls' advertising jingle "Nuttys, where all the nuts hang out." *snicker*
 * Interestingly, another nutty chocolate bar, actually called "Snickers" has recently adopted the slogan "Get some nuts!"
 * Also, a nut company called Nobby's, with the slogan "Nibble Nobby's Nuts!"
 * They also sell jerky, though they unfortunately decided to forgo the opportunity to use the golden marketing line "Nibble Nobby's Meat."
 * The Quizno commercials with Scott and the toaster oven. The toaster oven has a sexy voice and will try to get Scott to sound just as sexy and has a whole slew of Double Entendres. "Put it in me Scott" when Scott is about to put a sandwich in the oven. Unfortunately, a Bowdlerised version began airing. "Say it with more passion!"
 * Prime example of Getting Crap Past the Radar:

Scott: Not doin' that again. *looks at crotch* That burned."


 * CBS' 1978-79 slogan: "Turn Us On, We'll Turn You On".
 * Touching is good. Nintendo slogan. No, really.
 * Mr. Bucket: The jingle goes "I'm Mr. Bucket, I want your balls in my mouth."
 * The Doublemint commercials with hot twins saying "Double your pleasure, double your fun!"
 * Corn Nuts had a commercial in the 90s where the jingle was "bust a nut, bust a nut, just open up your mouth and bust a nut!" The jingle itself, if you didn't speak English, sounded innocent enough, making this a possible inversion.
 * George Carlin's 1971 album "FM & AM" featured a bit in which double entendres in commercials (cigarette ads, mostly) were exposed. The most glaring is a Tiparillo spot whose tag line "Should a gentleman offer a lady a Tiparillo?" is followed by a train going into a tunnel. (More a metaphor than a visual double entendre.) Carlin: "You don't have to be Fellini to figure that one out." Winston's tagline of the time, "It's not how long you make it, it's how you make it long", is cited as not only the filthiest tagline of all time but also based in truth.

Anime & Manga
"Nanako: Oh, I'm getting so wet just standing here watching him... I should really go inside where it's not raining."
 * While most of the example comes from full sentence, this one is notable that it come in two words that is constantly used. Remember Mazinger Z and Great Mazinger ? Other than Rocket Punch theres one other weapon that is also popular. Breast Fire and Breast Burner. Yup "Breast" Fire. Then theres the Oopai Missile
 * Even worse when you include the explanation about Breast Fire's power in series.
 * The English dub of Crayon Shin-Chan loves this trope.

"Touka: If you want to do it, you'll be going against me, boys. Any time, any place, as many times as you want... but if we are going to do it, don't flash me with that tiny thing. Come back with something a bit more impressive."
 * Everything Maso says is full of unintentional gay innuendo. "Please don't put your fist in me!" and "I know all about men, and men don't bend over without a fight!" to name a few.
 * Episode 4 of S-Cry-ed introduced George Tatsunami, an agent of HOLY who liked to brag about his Alter, a giant pink revolver called "Big Magnum", with almost every line about it an obvious Double Entendre: "It's big, it's thick, it's hard, and it's coming to get ya!"
 * FLCL is loaded with Double Entendres of all kinds, both verbal and visual (mainly the latter). You start to wonder if Freud Was Right after a while.
 * In Spice and Wolf Lawrence and Horo tend to speak to each other in these when they're teasing. Or when they're trying to trick someone.
 * There was a Fansub where a translator's note appeared in the middle of a long exchange of these saying "Have sex already, goddamnit!"
 * Grenadier has a few, though they might have been played up a bit more in the fansub. One notable one would be in Episode 5, where Kurenai Touka, the madam of a pleasure palace who is defending it against a gang of gun-toting bandits, says the following:

"Guard: S-something smells fishy...
 * Two episodes later, Rushuna, stopped at a government checkpoint, admits she doesn't have any identification papers, followed by this exchange:

Rushuna: (looking confused) What? But I just washed it... (sniffs at her left hand briefly)"


 * Rushuna kind of locks it into a single entendre, but the guard's statement can be taken two ways.

"Revy: I make it a rule never ** **** assholes. Or pussies."
 * Three.
 * Also, she always talks about removing her enemies' armor. Especially her partner's, Yajiro's, armor, which, considering their apparent attraction, can be taken two ways.
 * An episode of Neon Genesis Evangelion had a particular attachment to the physics term 'thermal expansion'. Asuka was explaining to Shinji what it meant. In a bathing suit. While leaning right over him. And then just drops the whole subtly and tries to use her breast as an example.. Later in the episode, while in the hot springs Shinji hears some rather suggestive dialogue coming from the girls' side and while looking down mentions thermal expansion.
 * This merits some explanation. When Shinji hears what sounds suspiciously like Misato molesting Asuka, he starts to blush. Seconds later, he looks down and notices Pen-Pen who's staring at Shinji's crotch with a "what the hell?!" face. Shinji then quickly submerges to his neck and says "thermal expansion... how embarrassing".
 * Given that this is Evangelion, it's entirely possible Misato was molesting Asuka, and entirely 100% certain that even if not, someone has written a doujinshi about it.
 * Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann has this between Yoko and Kittan in episodes 24 and 25. Namely, Yoko was a teacher until recently and mentions that she's going to give everything for her children. Kittan misunderstands this as Yoko being a mother. And of course, Yoko answering to his incredulous inquiry with a wink and "A good lady always has some secrets!" doesn't help things either. Her comment about gaining experience by shooting blanks (before her teacherhood, she was a sniper) is just the icing on the cake.
 * The second issue of Guren Gakuenhen has Kittan remarking that Simon and Nia seem to be pretty good friends; Nia answers that they "performed a husband-wife gattai so I'm his wife!" Hilarity Ensues as everyone in earshot takes it literally.
 * School Rumble: Eri asks Tenma if she's ever seen a man's body. Tenma being a Cloudcuckoolander and Eri not being specific results in some confusion. (Tenma later thinks they were talking about wrestling, and she replies with "yes" cries to "taking it in the mouth" and such.) Teehee. Also in the series, Mikoto is thinking of a plan to get her and Imadori back to the shore, and thinks of several plans, including Plan D, which involves using Imadori as a boat. She asks Imadori what plan he'll take, and he takes D gladly. Mikoto is at first surprised by this because it's the most dangerous, but then it turns out that he was just guessing Mikoto's breast size.
 * Revy in Black Lagoon gives us this:

"Fujiko: I just love a good shag."
 * Lupin III has given us this as well such this example from Fujiko in the English dub of the 2nd TV series. (While she was going undercover and noticing the type of carpet in the room.)

"Italia Veneziano: Germany! Germany! Save me! I'm on my bed now and my brother is-- OWW!! It's stuck! Owowowowowow!!
 * In one chapter, Mahou Sensei Negima has Ayaka Yukihiro invite Negi to her "paradise in the south"... Makes you wonder it was really unintentional on her part, or if her "big sister complex" has more to it than what meets the eye.
 * Negima as a whole has a lot of these.
 * Yakitate!! Japan's Tsukino subverts this. When Ken convinces Suwabara not to commit seppuku by telling him that Monica was pregnant, Ken says "when a man and a woman are living in the same house alone, there is nothing for them to do except--" She completes the sentence saying "play cards, right, Manager?"
 * Later played straight during the Yakitate 25 arc when Azuma and the gang are making a soft bread and their opponent is making a hard bread. Tsukino turns to the manager and says, "Between a hard and soft bread its obvious that hard is better, right?" To which Ken replies, "That's your preferment as a woman..." He is shirtless and she is wearing a bikini at the time to make it more suggestive.
 * Momoko from Shangri-la speaks almost entirely in double entendres.
 * Predictably, it happens in Bleach, when Nnoitra asks Ulquiorra how far he's gotten in ""taming" Orihime. Ulquiorra was not amused. Also Yoruichi, who is known as the "Goddess of Flash"? She can actually Flash Step out of her clothes. Which she has taught to Byakuya.
 * Ichigo to Renji; "TAKE IT OFF!!"
 * Referring to his gigai, but when you consider the very suggestive position they end up in... It's too anviliciously blatant to be accidental.
 * The fact that it's told that several nations do share the same bed in the anime version of Axis Powers Hetalia is enough to hint at something more... but a rather clear example of it occurs during a rather memorable over-the-phone conversation between the brothers Italy and Germany... which turned out to simply be their hair getting tangled up.

Italia Romano: N-Not there!! Put down the phone, you idiot!!

Italia Veneziano: Take it out! Take it out!!

Italia Romano: Put it down!! *click* *dial tone*

Germany: *long pause* ... His brother is... Stuck... "Oww"... Take it out..."


 * Considering the hairs in question are called 'erogenous zones' outright in the manga? This scene takes on a whole new meaning.
 * The time Prussia invaded Austria's vital regions
 * Chapter 13 of Ai Kora is largely an exercise in double entendres and dirty Japanese wordplay when Maeda realizes how much of a thrill he gets out of hearing Kirino say dirty things in that husky voice of hers. In Chapter 40, when Kirino tries to compose an original song, Maeda tricks her into performing a song laden with yet more double entendres. Then he does it again in Chapters 55 and 56, when he convinces Kirino to sing in a punk rock band (then weasels his way into the band himself). And again in Chapter 92, when Kirino tries out for a role in a movie musical. You'd think he would have learned by now...
 * In one chapter of the Yu-Gi-Oh manga, Yugi is explaining to Jounouchi how to exchange information between their digital pets, so that they can grow stronger. In doing so, he uses the word "gattai", which means both "combination" and "copulation". Jounouchi answers saying that their pets must "kouhai", that means "cross-fertilize" or "mate". Next to them, Honda warns them that people might hear them and misunderstand.
 * The English version translated this as Jounouchi saying "Alright, Yugi! Let's you and I mate [our virtual pets] right away!" and Honda complaining "I didn't need to hear that..."
 * Non-sexual example. The first words out of Luffy's mouth in the broadcast Funimation dub of One Piece were "That was fun, but I don't think I wanna go back there." In the show, he was talking about a dimensional ship graveyard the crew had just encountered. But coming off the previous dub which was handled by 4Kids, it was absolutely hilarious to the long suffering English fans.
 * At one point in the Zombie Powder manga, Gamma's opponent demands that he "pull out his piece". When Gamma draws his sword, he holds it upwards at a forty-five degree angle from his crotch.
 * In Panty and Stocking With Garterbelt, a good 80% of Panty's dialogue is this.
 * In a rare instance of a dub being noticeably funnier than a direct translation, the English dub of the first episode of Burn Up Excess features Maya preparing for a firefight, cooing, "Oh Hideo, you're so hard and long. Just a little while and I'll let you shoot your whole load, I promise." Who's Hideo? Her handgun.
 * Episode 3 of Afro Samurai shows our protagonist relentlessly pursued by a robot. When it's about to drop dead, it unleashes all its remaining energy in one final laser cannon blast that is barely averted. There a lot of phallic connotation to it, from the shape of the cannon (both before and after it fires) to the sidekick's quip once it's finally down: "I think he blew his load." That last double entendre actually harks back to the historical origins of the term "blowing your load" (the complete and proper firing of guns).
 * In the trailer for episode 2 of Chrono Crusade, Rosette goes on about how she's going to lose something precious, carrying on about it (without providing any actual description to the item being lost) to the point where one would think she's going to end up losing her virginity. In the episode itself, it turns out the precious something she loses is her gun.
 * Getter Robo: "If there's a hole, it's a man's job to thrust into it!" He's talking about traveling through wormholes, we swear.
 * The anime version of Crest of the Stars has a scene with dialogue between the main hero and heroine: "Be gentle" and "It's my first time", complete with heavy breathing. In reality they are crash landing on a enemy occupied planet- it's her first time landing a spaceship, and the heavy breathing is due to G-forces.
 * In Bubblegum Crisis: Tokyo 2040, Linna attempts to explain why she wants to stay in Tokyo (actually to stay with the Knight Sabers, an incognito superteam, but she can't say that), but if you take the dialogue at face value, it sounds more like she's awkwardly trying to come out to her very traditional mother. Considering the amount of Les Yay between herself and other lead character Priss, there's rather considerable debate on whether this is actually exactly what it sounds like.
 * One volume of XXX Holic opens with Watanuki asking "Really... no problem?" with Yuuko seductively replying "None, Watanuki. Come on. As hard as you like..."
 * This [[media:[[XXX Holic WTH]].jpg|part of a chapter]]. WHY IS DOUMEKI LOOKING AT WATANUKI AFTER SAYING THAT? The Double Entendre in this case couldn't have been unintentional.
 * Given that XXX Holic is one of CLAMP's babies, this isn't hard to grasp for some veteran readers. Considering all the times others have likened Watanuki to a cat, and based on CLAMP's track record thus far, I'd say it's hardly a leap to assume they're pulling the same Ship Tease with Doumeki and Watanuki.
 * In Macross Frontier, Sheryl once comments that "Implants are common on Galaxy", but she is "all Natural". What she means are brain implants, like built-in cameras etc. However it hears more like... "something else".
 * It wasn't Al's intention, but in the Second Raid OVA his commentary of the combat situation he's running for Souske applies perfectly to what the half-naked, drunk Tessa is doing.

Board Games
"Clue 1: I am a 4 letter word.
 * In the US there are several editions of an extremely successful board game called "Dirty Minds", which is nothing but double entendre. The slogan is "A dirty mind is a terrible thing to waste." In the game, players are given three clues towards an answer. The clues sound dirty but the answer is innocent.

Clue 2: I'm a name for a woman.

Clue 3: I end in "unt"."

"Clue 1: I usually take it in the rear.
 * The answer? . Here's another:

Clue 2: It takes a long hose to fill me.

Clue 3: You smell it on your hands when you're done."


 * Answer?.
 * The company, TDC Games, has just signed a contract for a future TV game show.

Comics
"Henchman 1: It seems... I don't know... provocative.
 * Somewhat disturbing example: in The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen volume 2, when Mina Murray learns that Hyde has taken care of the Invisible Man, he is quick to assure her that "I attended to his end. Rest assured, it was... comfortable." Being a proper Victorian lady, Mina takes comfort in this assurance of a painless death, not twigging for a second that this actually means that
 * In The Sandman, a caption describes devil-turned-nightclub-owner Lucifer playing a medley of unreleased (fictional) Cole Porter songs that Porter only performed privately for friends, ending with "She Never Went Down on the Titanic." (Someone really needs to write the lyrics to that.)
 * Though almost certainly unintentional, rereading some old comics can have readers in gales of uncontrollable laughter, due to the slang of the day.
 * A storyline in Cable and Deadpool involved Deadpool's friend Weasel joining HYDRA under the very inspired name Penetrator (or, rather, Penetraitor). Predictably, this caused some choice dialogue.

Henchman 2: In almost a... gratuitous fashion.

Penetrator: What? We're going to use the Penetrator to penetrate the warm, comfortable walls of mother Earth! This machine will ram home our agenda! All will know HYDRA has thrust themselves into the very womb of civilization! What's gratuitous about that...?"

"Wolverine: ... so I can show the Penetrator here something long and hard -- and cold and sharp!
 * Later:

Penetrator: Okay, I deserve the silly entendre, since I chose this name, but I really think you don't understand--"

"Deadpool: The Penetrator is my friend... Okay, wait, lemme try that again... Weasel is my friend -- and he happens to be sheathed in a protective coating that allows him to safely penetrate things... Okay, wait, lemme try that again--
 * And again:

Wolverine: Shut up!"

"Deadpool: Yeah, I'd like to flip Kitty Pryde.
 * Earlier during the run, when Deadpool attacked the Great Lakes Champions, he made fun of Mr. Immortal for owning the X-Men card set, Mr. Immortal replying they were only for flipping.

Squirrel Girl: Shut your evil, evil pie hole!"

"Deadpool: Scared the pants out of me... Well, not literally, 'cause then you'd be all distracted by my two bazookas. You know -- on account of I got one real bazooka -- and the other bazooka would be a metaphor for--
 * Though, in this case it might not actually have been a double entendre.
 * Cable and Deadpool's "Bodyslide by two".
 * "My name is Wilson. Wade Wilson. I'm a dick."
 * A conversation during Deadpool's fight against Taskmaster:

Taskmaster: Shut up! I get it. You think it was deep or something? Like your humour requires footnotes?"

"Deadpool: Me am horny. Okay, that was too obvious even for me."
 * Also, while fighting Rhino:

"Kara Zor-El: I'm looking through it. It's amazing. All the equipment I'm seeing. So many sizes and shapes...
 * "Finbarr Saunders and his Double Entendres" is a strip in Viz in which the title character laughs at various Double Entendre-sounding phrases exchanged between his mother and his neighbour. It always culminates in him realising it's all perfectly innocent, only for the last Double Entendre to actually have the sexual meaning and the strip to end with his mother and the neighbour shagging.
 * From Supergirl 4th series, #77.

Linda Danvers: All the ...? Kara! Just where are you looking?!

Kara: The equipment room, where they keep all the sporting stuff, why?

Linda: Oh, I thought you were peeping in at the guy's lock-- Forget it. My own dirty mind."

"Catwoman: Well? Or do I have to purr in your ear?
 * Shockingly enough, a fairly G-rated newspaper comic Pickles got a double entendre through once; the wife is tired of waiting for her husband to unclog the sink and the husband replies he'll get to it in a "sec". The wife grows furious and states "I spent half of my time waiting for secs! I don't want to hear any more about secs!" Her husband is then laughing very hard for obvious reasons and the wife is clueless as to why he is laughing. While her use of "secs" was something innocent, the husband saw that in an obviously different light.
 * Ditto for Moon Mullins, in which Emmy Schmaltz keeps trying to get young Kayo to turn off the TV and get to work on his homework. Kayo (repeatedly): "Just a sec, Emmy!" -- which results in an exasperated: "No, Kayo! No more 'secs!'" -- much to the surprise of Lord Plushbottom (speaking of double entendres) in the next room.
 * In Batman, this exchange takes place between Batman and Catwoman (it really does make sense in context).

Batman: No... but maybe later you could scratch my back.

Catwoman: What's the matter? No itches in the front?"

"Spider-Man: Anybody ever point out that you're a purple-headed invader, or has Stan Lee been laughing to himself for the last forty years?
 * The newspaper comic Cathy once featured the line than an off panel character was "in the restroom, giving the copier repairman a swirlie." The artist, Cathy Guisewite, was stunned that many readers thought that was a reference to oral sex, because she had always heard a "swirlie" was dunking someone's head in a toilet and flushing.
 * In a JLA Classified storyline where the Supervillain Blackguard is moving in next door. His real name is Richard Hurtz. But he prefers to be called Dick.
 * The Giant-Sized Man-Thing, or the fact that Kang is a purple-headed invader. The latter was actually pointed out in Twisted Toyfare Theater.

Kang: Eh, you know Stan."

"Huntress: Looks like she pulled out her mega rod.
 * Hawaiian Dick
 * From Birds of Prey #103: Huntress and Judo Master commenting on Big Barda's choice of weapon.

Judo Master: It's quite a devastating mega rod.

Huntress: Her massive mega rod looms large in her hand."

"Wrecker: Sister, you just earned yourself a taste of the big stick.
 * Nico from Runaways is a witch whose powers come from a big staff that gets absorbed into her body when she's not using it. In one issue, she fights a thug carrying a crowbar. Their dialogue goes like this:

Nico: Bet mine's bigger than yours."

""I swear, if tonight doesn't get more exciting, I'll go to the top of Big Ben and toss myself off.""
 * Knight & Squire, Paul Cornell's DC Comics miniseries about British superheroes, features a pair of villains called Double Entendre, who speak in these.


 * When Bullseye asks Daken which side he is on as the Dark Avengers and Dark X-Men quarrel, Daken responds that he always did like playing for both teams.
 * One arc of New Avengers was a Fantastic Voyage Plot. When Ant-Man and Doctor Strange go into Luke Cage's body to retrieve an explosive device from his heart, Spider-Man can't resist reminding Luke that "you have two men inside you right now."

Fan Works
"Alphonse: You just got fisted by GOD!"
 * This piece of fan art refers to Claudia of ''The Vampire Chronicles" as "La Petite Mort", "the little death". This is true both literally, as a vicious killer with the body of a child, and also, well, metaphorically. At least, that's what her fans are thinking.
 * Episode 2 of Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood Abridged features this one liner:

"Deku Tree: I want you inside me. (as in go inside of him and help him)."
 * It makes sense in context.
 * A few episodes of Adamwestslapdog's Ocarina of Time Abridged Series does this.

"Link: Now to mount Zelda and ride through the night."
 * This is mostly unintentional, since Navi (the fairy) even says to him, "Couldn't you have worded that a little bit differently?"
 * Another episode does this, after Link tells Navi why he named his horse Zelda:

"Yugi: Leave it to Beaver Warrior!
 * that time, it is definitely intentional.
 * Yu-Gi-Oh the Abridged Series, during Yugi's duel with the Paradox Brothers:

(Beaver Warrior gets destroyed)

Joey: Let this be a lesson to you, Yug'. Never, under any circumstances, leave your beaver exposed.

Yugi: You're right Joey, my beaver was on full display. Next time I'll take better care of my beaver.

Tea: I didn't know Yugi had a beaver."

"Goku: Well, when I got down here, I ran into some really weird guys. One was really big and muscly, but he went down really easy. Then these two guys double-teamed me. One of them took it really hard in the back, but the other didn't seem that interested, so he went and brought this really horny guy.
 * Zarbon from Dragon Ball Abridged practically lives off these.
 * Also this gem from episode 24 when Goku explains his situation to King Kai.

George Takei: Oh my...

Goku: Who's that, King Kai?

King Kai: It's George Takei. Somehow we made this into a three-way...

George Takei: OH MY...

King Kai: ...Call! Three-way call!"

Films
"Larabee: Let me out there, sir, I have no problem exposing myself.
 * In Get Smart, TheChief mentions that they need to employ a new agent, unknown of KAOS who's acquired a list of all CONTROL agents and is eliminating them.

Agent 99: Do you ever think before you speak?

Larabee: No, I just whip it out there. Seems to work best."

"Tiger Tanaka: I have much curiosity, Bond-san. What is "Little Nellie"?
 * Groucho Marx: Animal Crackers gives him the line "We took some pictures of the native girls, but they weren't developed." and has him present Margaret Dumont with a large wooden box. While describing it as "a magnificent chest", he accidentally points at her torso.
 * Both lines are topped by when Groucho introduced a musical performance by Chico: "Signor Ravelli's first selection will be "Somewhere My Love Lies Sleeping" with a male chorus.'
 * Lampshaded in the film version of Harry Potter: when talking to Harry, Hermione says Viktor Krum doesn't talk much, as he's "more of a physical being". There is a pause, and she laughs, saying that she didn't mean it that way.
 * "So, did you and Ginny do it?"
 * The female cop in Hot Fuzz speaks almost entirely in these, quite intentionally.
 * ...then is immediately followed up with the cop who has trouble speaking revealing what she's talking about in one word.
 * Shrek's line "Do you think maybe he's compensating for something?", upon seeing Lord Faarquad's towering castle, could both be interpreted as Faarquad compensating for his height or... something else.
 * In the proud and dirty tradition of British comedy, Wallace and Gromit has some well-hidden but very deliberate double entendres. In Curse of the Wererabbit, the object of Wallace's affections steps behind two very large marrows and sighs as she bemoans, "Victor just doesn't appreciate my produce." In another scene, Wallace finds himself suddenly naked, and quickly dons a cardboard box which reads "May Contain Nuts."
 * The 2009 christmas special A Matter Of Loaf And Death includes too many of these. Particularly before the climactic final scene.
 * Three words: Bond. James Bond.
 * Bond should probably have a special page just to list a choice sampling of this trope. Here's a real gem from You Only Live Twice:

James Bond: Oh, she's a wonderful girl. Very small, quite fast, can do anything. Just your type."

"Lt. Cmdr Dodge: Men, at ease. I'd like to introduce you to the newest member of our crew, Lt. Emily Lake. Emily is part of a pilot program to test the feasibility of women serving on submarines. She's going to be our diving officer.
 * This movie in fact begins with Bond getting machine-gunned in a girl's bed. The Hong Kong police remark "At least he died on the job...he would've wanted it that way."
 * The song "Keep it Gay" from the musical remake of The Producers. Sung by the flamboyant director Roger De Bris and his equally flamboyant partner, who never explicitly mention homosexuality in the lyrics.
 * The song "Let's Duet" from Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story turns several innocuous lines into double entendres by virtue of well-(or poorly-)timed pauses. Such as: "In my dreams, you're blowing me... some kisses." and "I just want to beat off... all my demons."
 * Played for laughs when Dewey sings a sweet song about holding hands at his high school dance. It's an utterly banal, benign song, but it inspires all the kids to dance provocatively; the girls even rip their shirts open. The outraged preacher later insists that everyone knows what "hold your hand" really means; a befuddled Dewey insists it means exactly that.
 * Christopher Walken uses his trademarked delivery to create one of these in Antz: "She's about yay tall, fairly easy... on the eyes", describing the missing princess.
 * Monty Python and The Holy Grail: "She's rich, she's beautiful, she's got huuuuge... tracts of land."
 * While he's discussing the size of said tracts, he's making a lifting and grabbing motion with his hands, which are situated in front of his chest...
 * Kate and Leopold: the man announcing the Brooklyn bridge; "And in the future I believe men will be judged by the size of their erections!"
 * The hook on which all the jokes in the Carry On! movies hang.
 * As parodied in this That Mitchell And Webb Look sketch, in which a doctor working at a typical 'bawdy 1970s hospital' has a bit of trouble grasping the nature of Double Entendre, with unfortunate results ("Shall I rub them against my cock?").
 * Doubling as a Parental Bonus, in Ratatouille, Linguini talks to Colette about his "Little Chef". While kids see it as Linguini trying to tell her about Remy (who Linguini calls Little Chef), adults can see a different meaning in his words... When Linguini says "I have a small..." Colette looks down for a split second.
 * Completely unintentional: Star Wars.
 * "She may not look like much, but she's got it where it counts, kid."
 * "Aren't you a little short for a Stormtrooper?"
 * "I have... felt him, my master." (It gets worse. The Emperor's line in reply? "Strange that I have not.")
 * "Luke, at that speed, will you be able to pull out in time?"
 * "Lost Tiree, lost Dutch. They came... from... behind!"
 * "Get in there, ya big furry oaf! I don't care what you smell!"
 * "Look at the size of that thing!"
 * "Negative, negative... it didn't go in. Just impacted the surface."
 * "Governor Tarkin. I should have expected to find you holding Vader's leash."
 * "Put that thing away! You're gonna get us all killed!"
 * "Size matters not! Look at me. Judge me by my size, do you? Hmm? Hmm. And well you should not. For my ally is the Force, and a powerful ally it is."
 * "Impressive! Most impressive!"
 * "You're not gonna like this, kid, but it'll keep you warm till I can get the shelter up."
 * "I thought they smelled bad on the outside."
 * "Your thoughts dwell on your mother."
 * "You came in that thing? You're braver than I thought."
 * "I can't. It's too big."
 * "Back door, huh?"
 * All right, now you're just reaching.
 * And you aren't the only who's noticed.
 * "My hands are dirty too, what are you afraid of?"
 * "Gee, I musta hit her pretty close to the mark to get her riled up like that, huh kid?" (And her reply: "Well I guess you don't know everything about women yet.")
 * Down Periscope has a series when introducing the lone female character:

Stepanek: Can she do a one-and-a-half inward back in the layout position?

Lt. Cmdr Dodge: All right, look, gentlemen! I know this is an unusual situation. Can't be easy for Lt. Lake here to be thrown into a jungle such as this, and I know it will make things hard on all of us...

Let me re-phrase that. It's going to make things difficult on all of us as well. But if we just work together as a team, I'm sure we can handle ourselves... Comport ourselves as professionals. That is all."

"Henry Purcell:Yeah, I've been called that a few times. (Group Laughs)"
 * The full designation of EDI, the AI controlling the UCAV in the film Stealth, stands for Extreme Deep Invader.

"Cooper: How 'bout you, Stark? You want something hot and black inside you?
 * Hairspray has a very neat little Triple Entendre. Corny Collins, amid a mist of hairspray, declares to one of the female dancers, "Looks like you need a stiff one!"
 * Brush up on your classics, people: The classic noir To Have and Have Not has Lauren Bacall intone to Humphrey Bogart, "You know how to whistle, don't you, Steve? You just put your lips together and... blow."
 * The film noir parody/homage Dead Men Don't Wear Plaid one-ups this somewhat, when Rachel Ward tells Steve Martin, "You know how to dial, don't you? You just put your finger in the hole and make tiny little circles."
 * For all the kids in the audience: this joke references an old device known as a "rotary phone", which became obsolete somewhere in the 1980s. And now you know.
 * Double entendre? Even ignoring the preceding dialog, with Bacall's delivery that line doesn't even qualify as a single entendre. It's, like, 3/4 of an entendre, tops.
 * In Event Horizon, after everyone wakes up from cryo sleep, there's a hilarious exchange between Cooper (who's black) and Lt. Stark.

Stark: (She gives him the finger.)

Cooper: Ooh, is that an offer?

Stark: (wryly) It is not.

Cooper: All right, well, how about some coffee then? (He gives her the coffee.)"

"Francie: (sharing a chicken meal) Do you want a leg or a breast?
 * In To Catch a Thief, the dialogue between John (Cary Grant) and Francie (Grace Kelly) has many:

John: You make the choice.

(...)

Francie: (before watching the fireworks) I have a feeling that tonight, you're going to see one of the Riviera's most fascinating sights... I was talking about the fireworks.

John: I never doubted it."

"Neff: The insurance ran out on the fifteenth. I'd hate to think of your getting a smashed fender or something while you're not -- uh -- fully covered."
 * In Hard to Kill, the nurse asks a comatose Steven Segal if he wanted some pussy, then shows him a kitten.
 * In Josie and The Pussycats, Melody causes a car crash when she holds up a promotional sign that read "Honk if you love pussycats". The "cats" part was concealed by a bush.
 * In The Ladies Man, Leon Phelps can't resist making innuendo when a nun he was interviewing starts talking about her "missionary position" in Africa.
 * When Scorpio meets Dirty Harry for the first time, he comments on how big Harry's gun was.
 * In Double Indemnity, Walter and Phyllis start exchanging these the moment Phyllis appears at the top of the staircase wearing nothing but a towel.

"Mr. Smith: I don't exactly keep count, but I would say... high fifties, low sixties. I've been around the block, but you know the important thing is--
 * Mr. and Mrs Smith are a little ambiguous about just how many:

Mrs. Smith: Three hundred and twelve.

Mr. Smith: Three hundred and twelve? How?

Mrs. Smith: Some were two at a time."

"Justin Hammer: You know Christine Everheart from Vanity Fair? You two know each other?
 * Naturally,
 * Even Disney did this (albeit unintentionally) in The Hunchback of Notre Dame, when Laverne incorrectly overheard Quasimodo and Esmeralda on top of the bell tower. "Frollo's nose is long, and he wears a truss." According to the directors' commentary, even though this wasn't the effect they were going for, kids often misheard "truss" as "dress." So the adults laughed at the idea of Frollo wearing a truss, and the kids (and some of the adults) laughed at the idea of Frollo wearing a dress.
 * [while Esmeralda is dancing] "Look at that disgusting display!" (with an eager smile on his face) "Yes sir!"
 * "I was just thinking about putting a rope around that pretty neck of yours"
 * The Bard uses a string of these in Shakespeare in Love when describing his writer's block, claiming at one point that that "the proud tower of my genius has collapsed" and that coming up with ideas is like "trying to pick a lock with a wet herring." And yet he's surprised when his psychiatrist asks if he's been "humbled in the act of love"...
 * Iron Man 2, anyone? (Admittedly, Robert Downey Jr. makes Tony Stark such a masterful Deadpan Snarker that some are easy to miss.)

Tony Stark: Yes, roughly."

"Hammer: She's actually doing a big spread on me for Vanity Fair.
 * It gets better.

Pepper Potts: Right. Well, she did quite a... spread on Tony last year...

Tony: AND she wrote a story."

"Tony: Hammer needs a slot, Christine."
 * But wait there's more! After discussing getting Hammer a slot on the schedule to present at the Stark Expo, Tony is called away by Natalie, and drops this little nugget:

""He's got a huge... talent!"
 * "Who's the black private dick that's a sex machine to all the chicks? Shaft!"
 * Damn right...
 * The "poetry reading" scene in the elephant in Moulin Rouge. On top of all the verbal ones, there's the moment where Satine has passed out and Christian is trying to revive her. His position and motions look very bad (or good) to the voyeuristic Zidler...

Satine: Why don't you lie down over here?

Christian: I prefer to do it standing." (cue a very flabbergasted look from Satine) "You see, it can be quite long..."

"Dark Helmet: I see your Schwartz is as big as mine! Let's see how you handle it."
 * Spaceballs does this throughout the movie.

Colonel Sandurz: It's Mega Maid! She's gone from suck to blow! "Alex: I'm so sorry Daddy, that I didn't tell you. I didn't think you'd approve and I didn't wanna disappoint you. I know how you wanted me to be a neurosurgeon. But I've discovered a whole new way to help people... that makes me feel so... alive.
 * And:
 * Though never said in-movie, creators have said that Toy Story's main protagonist's real name since the beginning has been 'Woody Pride'.
 * It's most likely unintentional, but really? The main characters' names are Woody and Buzz? The Sex Toy Story parody writes itself.
 * There is also the line by Rex at the end of the first movie about how he would like for Andy to get a herbivore so he could play the "dominant predator".
 * Nuns On the Run has a few, since the plot is British gangsters forced to hide as nuns.
 * Most of the Olsen Twins movies are peppered with really creepy double entendres, as can be found here.
 * In Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle Alex's dad thinks his daughter is a prostitute. A Running Gag has her words fit that description.

Mr. Munday: Whatever makes you happy.

Alex: I am so relieved! It's been killing me, you not knowing all these years. I- Daddy... Natalie, Dylan and I are a team. And we just took on 12 sailors. You can't even imagine the positions we get ourselves into. Daddy, I wish you could watch us work. You'd be so proud. I'm gonna take a shower because I am covered in- Well, you can only imagine what. And then when I get back, I am gonna give you... a full blow-by-blow."

"Connie Swail: (who has just been rescued from becoming a virgin sacrifice) How come his is so much bigger than yours?
 * This bit from the 1987 movie version of Dragnet:

Officer Joe Friday: Miss?

Connie Swail: The gun.

Officer Joe Friday: I've never needed more."

"Erik: We'll show you ours, if you show us yours."
 * Dick has more than one off-color use of Richard Nixon's nickname.
 * Mystery Team Charlie is completely incapable of understanding them
 * This line from Erik in X-Men: First Class was referring to their mutant powers but could easily have another meaning as he and Charles were in a strip club talking to a stripper.


 * Cannibal the Musical has a remarkably unique one (in that no one had done it before), which also handliy resolves an earlier It May Help You On Your Quest and neatly avoids becoming a Brick Joke: "Fudge, Packer?"
 * In the Rock Hudson/Doris Day movie Lover Come Back, Day's ad exec character gets the idea to come up with new packaging for Miller floor wax. She says' "The agency that gets this account is the agency that can show Mr. Miller a new can." Cut to a line of Bunny Club Bunnies, seen from behind
 * Blazing Saddles. Early in the movie Bart (played by the African-American actor Cleavon Little) is almost hanged. Later on a friend greets him with the line "They said you was hung!" and Bart says "And they was right!" (i.e. "well hung", well endowed).

Literature
"My name is Ozymandias, king of kings:
 * In Charles Dickens' Oliver Twist, Charlie Bates is referred to as Master Bates throughout most of the book.
 * A non-sexual example: The Most Dangerous Game. A story about a hunter who grows tired of hunting animals, so he kidnaps people and sets them loose in a jungle for the purpose of hunting them. The title in this case is the double entendre. One meaning is that the actual sport of hunting is the most dangerous game to play, but the other meaning is that humans are the most dangerous game to hunt.(And therefore the most challenging according to the hunter's logic.)
 * Another non-sexual example is Percy Bysshe Shelley's famous poem, "Ozymandias" in which on a shattered ruins of a colossal statue, the inscription reads:

Look on my works, ye Mighty, and despair!""

"Nanny Ogg: 'S called the Vieux River.
 * The original meaning of "despair" was that nobody could hope to equal his achievements, but seeing the statue in ruins, the reader might "despair" to find that all beings are mortal.
 * Nanny Ogg from the Discworld series by Terry Pratchett enjoys using these, although according to Carpe Jugulum, hers are usually "single entendres, and proud of it". Then there's this gem:

Granny Weatherwax: Yes?

Nanny Ogg: Know what that means?

Granny Weatherwax: No.

Nanny Ogg: The Old (Masculine) River.

Granny Weatherwax: Yes?

Nanny Ogg: (hopefully) Words have sex in foreign parts.""

"Terry: I staggered into a Manchester bar late one night on a tour and the waitress said "You look as if you need a Screaming Orgasm". At the time this was the last thing on my mind..."
 * Nanny actually calls them 'intenders'.
 * Nanny is so fond of these that it's a sign that things are really serious when she doesn't use them.
 * There's also Nanny Ogg's favorite song, "A Wizard's Staff Has a Knob on the End..."
 * And "The Hedgehog Song", which doesn't so much use double entendres as it does beats you over the head with it.
 * The Watch bar The Bucket serves the Long Slow Double Entendre. The answer to all those drink names...
 * And also the Screaming Orgasm, possibly in a bid to be as blunt as possible, on the basis that it's funnier to just have Single Entendres and get them out of the way. This is apparently a real cocktail that Terry Pratchett has been offered.

""What d'you mean, I'm not brave in bed?" said Harry, completely nonplussed.
 * The witches aren't alone with this. Mustrum Ridcully calls the University organ "Our Mighty Organ". Much to the dismay of the rest of the wizards.
 * It's possible that one's purposefully done by Ridcully.
 * There's also a non-sexual double meaning in The Fifth Elephant, when Sybil is musing on Vimes' berserk rage: "There'd been the case with that little girl and those men over in Dolly Sisters, and when they broke in he'd found that one of them had stolen one of her shoes, and she'd heard Detritus say that if he hadn't been there only Sam would have walked out of the room alive." Vimes insists that he's never deliberately killed anyone, so probably the obvious meaning is the true one here, but one can imagine that Sybil is pretty damn worried over the phrasing.
 * Speaking of The Fifth Elephant, there's also a subplot concerning an industrialist who gets murdered in his own condom factory. There's as much Double Entendre as you'd expect; enough, indeed, that the word "condom" isn't mentioned once and doesn't need to be.
 * That's because in Discworld the handy little thing has been named after its inventor as a 'sonky'. One of those Inherently Funny Words.
 * In The Truth, Vimes tells newspaper editor William de Worde that it looks as though the President of the Guild of Shoemakers and Leatherworkers will be the next Patrician, and names the man and gives the address of his shop. The guy doesn't sell shoes, but what he does sell comes under the heading of leatherwork, and there isn't a Guild of Makers of Little Jiggly Things for him to belong to instead.
 * In Snuff, Vimes keeps trying to use these, but Sybil curtails him.
 * Thursday Next villains have these in their names (Jack Schitt even gets lampshaded). As does Daphne Farquitt.
 * One Robert Rankin novel featured a woman who communicated entirely in Double Entendre, culminating in "that would be the blow job", referring to the job of blowing into a clogged nozzle to clear the blockage.
 * She appears later during a town meeting. When the mayor asks if the meeting is really expected to swallow the Zany Scheme cooked up by the leads, she announces she'll "swallow it with pleasure." Pooley thinks, "Here we go again. Carry On Up The Council Chamber."
 * Kerry Greenwood's Phryne Fisher novels have a song that goes, "My man Tom has a thing that is long" to which the response is "My maid Mary has a thing that is hairy" and it goes on about how Tom is going to put his thing that is long in Mary's thing that is hairy... and it's a broom handle and a broom head.
 * The song in question is real, and is attributed on this album to Josquin des Prez (c. 1450-1521).
 * Harry Potter fans have found dozens of unintentional (and some intentional) innuendos:

There was a groan of bedsprings, and Harry's mattress descended a few inches as George sat down near his feet. "So, got there yet?" said George eagerly.

"He's having a go at my mother!" Seamus yelled.

"I thought not", said Snape, watching him closely. "You let me get in too far. You lost control."

"Manners, Potter", said Snape dangerously. "Now, I want you to close your eyes." Harry threw him a filthy look before doing as he was told. He did not like the idea of standing there with his eyes shut while Snape faced him, carrying a wand.

He was on all fours again on Snape's office floor.

"Well, we'll soon find out, won't we?" said Snape smoothly. "Wand out, Potter."

Harry moved into his usual position...

He came quickly, as if a white flag had come out of his wand."

""She tasted disgusting, worse than Gurdyroots! Okay, Ron, come here so I can do you.""
 * Harry enters the Chamber of Secrets to find Ginny, . And has to fight a giant snake with a legendary sword. He ends the episode by flying out of a deep shaft, with Ginny hanging on to his leg.

""Harry could see Draco Malfoy banging his goblet on the table. It was a sickening sight.""
 * After, Harry asks if they "could just--just hold it in" until they . He's talking mostly to.
 * The line that launched an epic Cargo Ship:

"Ron struggled for a moment before managing to extract his wand from his pocket.
 * 'As the nearest bead of light moved nearer to Harry's wand tip, the wand beneath his fingers grew so hot he feared it would burst into flame. The closer that bead moved, the harder harry's wand vibrated...'
 * 'Something silver white, something enormous, erupted from the tip of his wand.'
 * Obligatory link
 * And another.

"It's no wonder I can't get it out, Hermione. You packed my old jeans, they're too tight."

"Oh, I'm so sorry", hissed Hermione ... Harry heard her mutter a suggestion as to where Ron could stick his wand instead."

"Ianto: Don't shoot. I'll come quietly. Or loudly, whichever you prefer."
 * Pride and Prejudice contains this gem: "Mr. Collins, awkward and solemn, apologising instead of attending, and often moving wrong without being aware of it, gave her all the shame and misery which a disagreeable partner for a couple of dances can give. The moment of her release from him was ecstasy."
 * Son of the Beach, the title of which is a double entendre itself, is full of these, usually missed by the speaker, but noticed the character Kimberlee.
 * Daisy Miller is full of these, such as Daisy constantly remarking how "stiff" Winterbourne is in her presence, and Winterbourne's acquaintances using "studying at Geneva" as a code for something else entirely...
 * The cantigas de amigo from medieval Galicia, amigo meaning in this case boyfriend and not friend. Example: A girl comments to her mother that there was a deer playing in the river while she cleaned her clothes.
 * Christopher Hitchens wrote a book highly critical of Mother Teresa, Characterizing her not as a saintly charitable worker, but as a sociopathic cultist Villain With Good Publicity who used the poor for the aggrandizement of her order. The book was entitled "The Missionary Position". Another working title was "Sacred Cow", but Hitchens considered it in bad taste.
 * The Torchwood novel Undertaker's Gift, when Jack nearly shoots Ianto.

"Then, as they were conversing, he saw the breast of the maiden over the bosom of her smock, and said to her, "Fair is this plain, the plain of the noble yoke.""
 * An odd example appears in the audiobook - and possibly ONLY the audiobook, depending on how you read it - of Patricia C. Wrede's Dealing With Dragons. Cimorene's father, upon hearing that she doesn't want to marry Prince Therandil, responds with, "Well, it's not exactly a brilliant match, but I didn't think you'd care how big his kingdom is." The voice actor on the audiobook takes it one step further by including a significant pause between "his" and "kingdom."
 * Lemony Snicket: The Unauthorized Autobiography is filled with the non-sexual version, though no less adult. Mr. Snicket is often described as a "theatrical critic, in all senses of the phrase".
 * As it turns out, Cu Chulainn had been referring to breasts as tracts of land centuries before Monty Python ever did.

Live-Action TV
"Tobias Funke: ... even if it means me taking a chubby, I will suck it up."
 * Geoff Peterson on The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson likes to hang a lampshade on double entendres with, "Is that code?" Then again, he likes to make 'em as well.
 * In Smallville Lois is explaining to Clark how to wear cufflinks "make sure this part sticks up straight then it slides right in" judging by her face it seems that she only noticed the double entendre after she said it.
 * A non-sexual example can be found in the title of the Twilight Zone episode "To Serve Man" (based on a short story by Damon Night). The title can mean either "to perform a service for humanity" or "to serve the meat of a human as food." Given the show, guess which one they're talking about here.
 * Are You Being Served lives and breathes double entendre, most notoriously those involving Mrs. Slocombe's pussy (cat). Then there's the mild one right in the title.
 * I Carly: Despite being a kids show, the writers can be mercilessly subtle with such dialogues.
 * Arrested Development
 * Tobia's homosexual tendencies are a running joke in the show; he makes frequent sexual double-entendres to which he seems completely oblivious.

"Tobias Funke: I just blue myself!"
 * While talking to Michael after preparing to audition for the Blue Man Group with full makeup:

"Cowboy Curtis: You know what they say about a man with big feet?
 * Pee Wees Playhouse, which was ostensibly a children's show, thrived on subtle double entendres.
 * One of the best ones:

(pause)

Cowboy Curtis: He needs big shoes."

"Xander: How're you feeling?
 * Buffy the Vampire Slayer featured a number of double entendres based around Kendra's pet name for her favorite stake, "Mr. Pointy".
 * Depending on who you ask, this was either this trope or Accidental Innuendo. In Season 8, after Xander is forced to ride Centaurette Dawn (causing her to get soaking wet), this exchange happens:

Centaurette!Dawn: Like I was ridden hard and put away wet.

Xander: AGH! Dawn, that's dis -- oh. No. It's just true."

"Buffy: He was my first. (Joyce is shocked) My only!"
 * Also when Buffy talks to her mother about Angel's true nature.

"Larry: Man! Oz, I would love to get me some of that Buffy and Willow action, if you know what I mean.
 * For a non-sexual example, in the final episode, Buffy has just ripped a man in half using an axe. When her ex boyfriend asks what happened to the man, she tells him that he had to split. This is followed by Buffy laughing.
 * Referenced in "Phases":

Oz: That's great, Larry. You've really mastered the single entendre."

""You make me com... plete! You make me com... plete! You make me com... plete!""
 * Also, Larry is actually gay, so the above line works pretty well for a gay guy trying to hide his gayness.
 * The end of Willow and Tara's song in "Once More With Feeling" with lyrics like I can feel you inside and Lost in ecstasy, spread beneath my Willow tree. Joss later admits in the commentary, "OK, this is porn."

"Willow (looking slyly at Tara): I'm a breast girl, myself.""
 * "Once More With Feeling" is riddled with it. The song with Xander and Anya have a few: "You're the cutest of the scoobies with your lips as red as rubies and your firm yet supple.. tight embrace"
 * A non-sexual one from the same episode: (in the middle of a tense musical confrontation of the villain) "[Buffy] needs backup. Anya, Tara." They both hurry take their places as back-up dancers.
 * Buffy brings home chicken legs for the Scoobies.

"Spike: I can't go inside, so ... maybe the time is right ... for you to come outside."
 * Spike works in plenty during his covert relationship with Buffy, such as when Buffy won't let him inside the house for sex because Dawn is there.

"Faith: The close-but-no-cigar thing with Angel. I don't know if I could handle, you know, the way you're not handling it."
 * Faith naturally gets in on the act, e.g. "Enemies" when talking to Buffy about her UST with Angel.

"Buffy: Cars and Buffy are, like...un-mixy things.
 * Even 'nice boy' Riley does it in "Something Blue".

Riley: It's just because you haven't had a good experience yet. You can have the best time in a car. It's not about getting somewhere. You have to take your time. Forget about everything. Just...relax. Let it wash over you. The air...motion... Just, let it roll.

Buffy: We are talking about driving, right?"

"Jamie: Look at the size of that thing, Doctor!
 * Another non-comic version is in "Fool for Love" when Spike is sparring with Buffy outside the Bronze while relating how he killed her predecessors. Spike's talk of 'dancing' (fighting to the death) with Buffy increasingly takes on sexual overtones until he's driven to make an actual pass at her. Buffy's disgusted rejection of the idea that Spike will be the one to kill her is played exactly like Buffy rejecting the idea that she will ever become his lover.
 * The scene between Willow and Spike in season 4 (just after he's been made unable to hurt people) when he tries to bite her and can't. Just replace every instance of "bite" with...you know...
 * Threes Company enjoyed a healthy dose. It was the premise of the show. In fact, almost every plot was an extended Innocent Innuendo.
 * Queer As Folk to an occasionally ridiculous degree, but the famous 'I'm coming' is never featured.
 * Almost every television series starring Rik Mayall (The Young Ones) featured a number of double entendres every episode; in fact, the original intent of calling one series Bottom was to force double entendre on the viewers: "I saw that 'Bottom' on telly the other night -- no, wait, that's not what I meant." The original title of the show, "Your Bottom", made the double entendre even worse: "I saw Your Bottom on TV yesterday."
 * There a bit of this within-show, as well:"Now can we just get our equipment out? I mean, get our tackle out... no, I mean, get our GEAR out! Oh my God, you can't say anything without some dreadful double entendre lurking round the corner!"
 * Gleefully played with in one Bottom live show where characters, actors and audience all know of the (barely) double meanings. "For hours we clung to your sturdy organ as we were tossed about in the foamy... brine!"
 * Surprisingly, The New Statesman, for a Mayall series, is relatively free of double entendres, except for the lead character's name, Alan B'Stard. Maybe the rule regarding Mayall should be that he double-entendres himself to death in any role written by either himself or Ben Elton. His double-entendres as the various Lord Flashhearts on Black Adder are barely single entendres, and are the exemplars of this trope. 'Send a car. General Melchett's driver should do. She's used to hanging around with the big nobs so will be fine with a chap like me. Woof!'
 * Doctor Who, "The Doctor Dances": Dancing is used as a euphemism for sex, showing off the Doctor's problems with intimacy and Captain Jack's flexibility, among other things. In a rare visual double entendre, the Doctor literally slips Jack a banana. This is reused in "The Girl in the Fireplace", when Reinette asks the Doctor to dance with her. Notably, this episode also features the Doctor utilizing a banana. (He visits a really wild party, gets very drunk and may have invented the banana daiquiri. )
 * Also, in "The Two Doctors", Jamie and the Second Doctor spot a spaceship via the scanner screen.

The Doctor: Yes, Jamie, that is a big one."

"Master: I want the Doctor's body!"
 * Jamie's first line to fellow companion Victoria was "quick Miss Waterfield, up your passage!" Frazer Hines (Jamie), Deborah Watling (Victoria) and Patrick Troughton (the second Doctor) were quite keen on getting as many in as possible.
 * Doctor Who also featured a number of "unintentional double entendres" where neither meaning was sexual. At least once an episode, someone would say, "There is no plot!", "We must act!", or similar phrases.
 * And the Doctor and the Master always seem to be doing this to each other:

"Jackie: Anything else he's got two of?"
 * Not to mention Jackie's comment when Rose was explaining to her about how the Doctor has two hearts.

"Doctor: See, I told you it [a gadget] was small.
 * This while she's eyeing him up and down.
 * In the Made for TV Movie, Eight shows just how much of a Chaste Hero he is, even if he is the first Doctor to snog on camera, by innocently walking straight into one of these:

Grace: What is it they say?

Doctor: Yeah, they say that on my planet too."

""Ooh, Doctor, you sonicked her!""
 * River Song asks the Doctor to sonic her radio to boost the frequency. Amy, on the other hand...

"Monica: Ya know, my motto is get out before they go down.
 * Torchwood has quite a few by virtue of being... well. Torchwood.
 * Benny Hill built a career out of them.
 * A particularly transparent example from Friends involved a discussion between Chandler and a coworker about the inclusion of information from the "Weekly Estimated Net Usage Statistics" in the "Annual Net Usage Statistics" -- that is, the insertion of the WENUS into the ANUS.
 * Another example from Friends when Monica is asked that why she sold her stock:

Joey: This is so not my motto."

"Patient: Doctor, I'm getting a little tired of the sexual innuendo.
 * Joey apparently has a talent to make anything sound like innuendo. Take, for example, like "Grandma's chicken salad".
 * CSI has these from time to time. For example, Sara saying, out of the blue "I've got crabs.", with Gil looking at her funny, then she points at a piece of evidence she's examining, which has... crabs. (That was one of the ickiest episodes of all of CSI, which is famous for its levels of Squick. Also one of the few with no B or C Corpses.)
 * In Scrubs, a character named Todd turns nearly everything said to him (or near him) into a double entendre. ("I'd like to double her entendre!")

Todd: In-your-endo."

"Carter: You walk past them every day, and you never even notice them. I say use them. Take advantage of them.
 * This is nearly the Todd's raison d'être. In at least one episode he mentions that he actually seeks out these opportunities, commenting, "People think I just luck into these situations, but it's really a lot of hard work. You know what else is hard?"
 * "I should go."
 * Spin City would occasionally spend an episode leading up to an extended double entendre. For example, in this one, Carter is making a speech on prostitutes; unfortunately, Mike told him it was about libraries...

Reporter: Uh, Mr. Heywood, are you saying you've... used one?

Carter: Why yes, I was in one just this morning. In fact, I was having such a good time I found it hard to keep quiet."

"Arkwright: You have lovely knees, Nurse Gladys. Of course, my thoughts are above such things."
 * Open All Hours does this all the time, but memorably in this line:

"Connery: I'll take Jap-Anus Relations.
 * Noah's Arc: There are plenty, virtually all of the sexual variety. In fact, this is the main way Noah and Wade communicate their Unresolved Sexual Tension early on.
 * Used completely unexpectedly in Brainiac, in an experiment to see which hat would hold up to the most punishment. After describing the hard hat, Vic Reeves turns to the camera and says, with a perfect poker-face, "If you've ever had a hard on, you'll know it can be rock solid."
 * The "Professor Mayang Lee" segments are full of it. Let's just say that she is rather large in a certain area and it involves fruit.
 * Also the "How hard is your thing?" segment. PLUS, as a bonus, on one of the 'NASA didn't try...' segments (the car one), at the end Vic states that Braniac will be responsible for, and I quote "The first pilot of a rocket car to blast off on Uranus."
 * In one Beakmans World segment explaining rotational inertia, Beakman breaks out the Beakman Rotational Aerodynamic Thingies. Commence thingy-twirling jokes, and compound that with the fact that the girl wins...
 * Monty Python's Flying Circus:
 * One sketch sees a Dirty Old Man go into a newsagents and interpret all of the adverts on the noticeboard as being adverts for prostitutes, eventually leading him to some truly ludicrous double entendres when he tries to get further details from the newsagent. ("I'd like a bit of pram, please!") Eventually, in frustration he demands the actual prostitute's advert, which is written in a fashion bluntly describing what is on offer (Sexy blonde prostitute, will perform all acts...) -- and doesn't understand a word of it.
 * The Wink Wink Nudge Nudge guy, who turns everything said to him into a double entendre, no matter how forced it is, and then tries to force a double entendre into everything he says. In the end, the character admits it's because he's never had sex and wonders what that's like.
 * The British children's TV show Rainbow: Holyshit.
 * Mystery Science Theatre 3000 explored this trope when the 'bots asked Joel why the actors in the movies were talking the way they were. Joel explained that by controlling the inflection of your voice you can make anything sound sexual. He went on to demonstrate with such phrases as "The Factory is still open, but they are making different stuff" or "Yep, My shoes are a little tight."
 * She came back from the store with a bag of apples... and a loaf of bread!
 * The entire premise of Jack of All Trades appears to be to string together as many puns and double entendres as possible.
 * Firefly includes some amusing examples. In the episode "War Stories", Jayne watches Inara kissing a female client -- and right after he proclaims he's going to his bunk, Zoe orders him to "grab your weapon" for a potentially dangerous mission.
 * From Our Mrs. Reynolds: "Jayne. Go play with your rain stick."
 * Seinfeld had almost a ton of these. The contest episode in particular.
 * Saturday Night Live (which has been packed with double entendres since 1975) has this in early Celebrity Jeopardy sketches, in which Sean Connery would turn the categories into these. For example...

Trebek: That's "Japan-US Relations".

(...)

Connery: I'll take The Rapists.

Trebek: That's "Therapists".

(...)

Connery: I've got to ask you about The Penis Mightier...

Trebek: That's "The Pen Is Mightier".

Connery: I don't care what you call it, I'm asking does it work?!

(...)

Connery: I'll take Catch the Semen.

Trebek: That's "Catch These Men".

(...)

Connery: I'll take Anal Bum Cover.

Trebek: That's "An Album Cover", you horrible, horrible man.

Connery: HO, HO, HO, HO!

(...)

Connery: I'll take Whore Semen. (Walks up to the board and points at the "Horsemen" category) See? "Whore"--like your mother--"Semen.""

"Tim: If a military man like you, a soldier, er, could you give a man a lethal blow?
 * And then there's the "Delicious Dish" sketch in which Alec Baldwin's character, baker Pete Schweddy, introduces his dessert, "Schweddy Balls". Rapidly becomes an Overly Long Gag (and an obvious one), but they maintain perfectly deadpan delivery throughout while saying such lines as, "Wow. I can't wait to get my mouth around his Balls", and "Do whatever you want to, ladies. My Balls are here for your pleasure."
 * And then he comes back with Schweddy Weiners, which taste best if they're inserted into Schweddy Buns.
 * Betty White as confectionery rock star Florence Dusty and her Dusty Muffin.
 * There's also a sketch about a tour at a winery with Janet Jackson Finding out about Cork Soaking.(The sketch almost falls apart as Janet and the rest of the cast can barely hold it together, as Janet almost Blows the Line (wait I just Made one there.)
 * Also a series of parody campaign ads in which Pat Finger runs for city council of Butts, New York. ("In 1869, my great-grandfather, E. T. Finger fell in love with Butts and, well, there's been a whole mess of Fingers in Butts ever since.")
 * Robert De Niro played a CIA spokesman who read lists of suspected terrorists - "most of the calls have come from high school and college students nationwide". They include Hous Bin Pharteen ("a silent, but deadly killer"), I-Zheet M'Drurz ("when he was fleeing the scene of his last attack, he left skidmarks") and Apul Madeek ("who we believe will be targeting adult bookstores sometime in the near future")
 * In The Office (UK version) Tim and Dawn amuse themselves with a perfectly innocent conversation about armed combat with Gareth.

Gareth: If I was forced to, I could. If it was absolutely necessary, if he was attacking me.

Tim: If he was coming, really hard?

Gareth: Yeah, if my life was in danger, yeah.

Tim: And do you imagine always doing it face to face with a bloke, or could you take a man from behind?

Gareth: Either way's easy.

Tim: So you could take a man from behind?

Gareth: Yeah.

Tim: Lovely."

"Garibaldi: (faced with a pack of Drazi missionaries, early in the third season) Zack, do me a favour and explain the missionary, ah, position to these folk."
 * The Thin Blue Line had what has to be one of the most Egregious examples when Grim urges Fowler not to make any mistakes: "'cause you know what'll happen Raymond, don't you? It'll be your cock-up, my arse!"
 * The series as a whole seems rather fond of this joke. Compare; "It's my arse on the line here, and I don't want a cock-up!", and "I'll show them when Grim of Gasforth puts his arse on the line, they can't just stick two fingers up!"
 * It happens almost Once Per Episode. The different variations on the same theme are actually quite inventive. Possibly it counts as a Running Gag.
 * Noah's Arc: There are plenty, virtually all of the sexual variety. In fact, this is the main way Noah and Wade communicate their Unresolved Sexual Tension early on.
 * As with the movie examples above, Groucho Marx was known for his quick wit in his talk show, You Bet Your Life. One interview with a woman with many children led him to ask why she had so many. She replied that she loved her husband. His reply: "Well, I love my cigar, but I take it out of my mouth once in a while!" Apparently everyone in the studio was in hysterics for some time.
 * I'd insert all the double entendres from Veronica Mars in here, but fun as it is I don't want to be doing this all day, and frankly it could be too long for the page to handle.
 * The narrator and sometimes even the crew of Myth Busters seems rather fond of double entendres. "It's time to play hide the sausage" from the Salami Rocket myth, for example.
 * The less said about Adam riding the giant chicken cannon, the better.
 * Mike Rowe from Dirty Jobs is fond of these as well.
 * Even the title of the series itself can be a Double Entendre.
 * Discovery Networks actually collected a bunch of them into a video here.
 * Babylon 5 is not averse to these.

"Horneigh: Say, do you believe in the hereafter?
 * Tyrone F. Horneigh, the recurring Dirty Old Man character in Rowan and Martins Laugh In.

Woman: Yeah.

Horneigh: Well, now you know what I'm here after."

""Goddamit! I'm sure of it now."
 * Half the jokes in On the Buses revolve around Jack and Stan cracking double entendres.
 * Corner Gas
 * An episode is based around the male characters all trying to buy better cell-phones than each other. The following dialogue occurs between one of said men and an unsuspecting local.

"What?"

"His is smaller than mine! We were in the bathroom and he had it out and -- not that I was looking or anything. Just noticed it out of the corner of my eye sort of thing."

"Okay..."

"But it's not really the size that matters is it? And mine's not big either. It's just bigger than his. You've seen mine haven't you? Here, I'll get it out."

"I gotta go.""

"Karen: Davis is out?
 * The episode involving Davis, the Cosmo-reading somewhat Ambiguously Gay police officer, being locked in a jail cell with Hank, the village idiot. Davis ends up escaping, which leads to this exchange between Karen (Davis' partner) and Hank:

Hank: Well, that's not for me to say, really..."

"Hank: Hey, where's your F 'n' E?"
 * A drug one when half of the cafe letters fall down

""You guys should totally check out my opening. It takes a while for things to warm up down there, so try not to come too early.""
 * The episode with the female doctor coming to town involved the doctor taking everything the locals said as a double entendre. Hilarity Ensues.
 * Rules of Engagement features more than a few, usually delivered by Russell. However, one of the funniest episodes features a woman who speaks in nothing but double entendres, seemingly without realising what she is doing, and this drives Russell nuts. Her best effort occurs when she is talking about the new nightclub she is starting:

"Dad: Honey... What does this remind you of? (eyebrowquirk)
 * Doctor Gregory House is also fond of double entendres, though in season 4's "Whatever it Takes" he fails, saying:
 * An example played straight in season 4 from "Don't Ever Change": House asks Thirteen, "You do it both ways, right?" Earlier in the episode she is revealed to be bisexual. House claims he was referring to two ways of doing an ultrasound.
 * It also qualifies as an instance of Getting Crap Past the Radar, but one episode of Supernatural (s2 ep6) features a female character squeezing by Dean in a tight space between walls of an apartment complex. Dean mutters "Should've cleaned the pipes." When he is asked what that meant, he quickly shines a flashlight over to the plumbing and stammers something out.
 * This particular segment on The Colbert Report, about someone who was caught working in the nude.
 * Bill Nye the Science Guy had one in an episode about Volcanoes. It showed a family of three sitting at a table, and the dad had made his mashed potatoes into a tall, semi-cone shaped blob. He then took a large spoonful of gravy and poured it onto the top and watched it drip down the sides. And then he talks to his wife while continuing to pour gravy on it:

Mom: (smirk) Oh honey, you KNOW what that reminds me of.

Dad: C'mon honey, I wanna hear you say it. What does this remind you of?

Mom: Honey! It's embarrassing!

Dad: (stares)

Mom: Oh, alright... If you insist... (suddenly very serious) It reminds me of a Strata Cone Volcano, which builds up in the Earth's crust to make it BIG.... and STRONG... (sexy hissing)

Son: ... Dad?... May I please be excused from the table?"

"Ziggy: I would have layed odds that you were a dude.
 * My Boys had one. The protagonist's old friend visits her, bringing her Sex and The City look-a-like friends. The one that acts like Samantha speaks in so much innuendo that no one understands her.
 * Power Rangers RPM. Ziggy has recently learned that Dr. K is a girl. Watch what happens:

Dr K:... Sorry to disappoint you."

"Ziva: Tony, I never knew you were afraid of a little pussy... cat."
 * Will and Grace is built on double entendre.
 * The Brazillian show Casseta e Planeta: urgente was known to use a joke about a woodman that remove latex from wood. The joke was about him removing "milk" (the latex) from wood. Wood in portuguese means "pau", that is also an euphemism for cock. In context, it means he was having a handjob. It's was a little subverted because the woodman called the double entendre just moments before was said. It reached extreme levels when he interrupted a commercial about a satellite that could take pictures of all over the world (possibly the google earth) and complained about the overusing of the joke while LOOKING STRAIGHT to the satellite.
 * NCIS had this exchange between Tony and Ziva whose whole relationship seem to based on. After a cat has run out the pet door and Tony jumps startled:

"Viking Expert: That's the biggest piece of wood your samurai has ever seen."
 * Another such example was during another of Tony and Ziva's bantering sessions, where Ziva says, "Tony, I've told you, I like to have fun in more...adult ways." It turns out that she's talking about reading, but it's understandable why people might initially interpret it in a very different way.
 * Deadliest Warrior has this bit of smack talk in the Viking vs Samurai episode when they were about to test the Viking Shield:

"Georgina: No thank you, the Lord cannot enter the body solely by alcohol.
 * At least 70% of Chuck Bass's dialogue on Gossip Girl consists of this. Example:

Chuck: That's good, because I prefer to be the one doing the entering."

"Woolsey: You poached my private spot!... Uh, what I meant to say is: you discovered my little personal area... Uh, this is where I come to be alone with my thoughts.
 * When Richard Woolsey on Stargate Atlantis discovers that a new (gorgeous female) team member is standing in the area of the city he uses to reflect on his thoughts:

Conrad: Do you mind sharing it?

Woolsey: Not at all."

"We'll lick those aliens... or go down like men."
 * Made even worse when
 * A staple of Lexx, from the blatant to the subtle.

"Charlie: You know, Herb, that is a fine, fine hat.
 * Two and A Half Men is also fond of using this, sometimes excessively, which shows in this example of Charlie talking to Herb in the garden.

Herb: Gotta wear it. Otherwise I freckle like a banana.

Charlie: Well... I wouldn't want your banana to get freckled.

Alan: Let's go, Charlie.

Charlie: Hang on! Hang on. We're having a real interesting conversation here. Hey Herb, tell Alan what you told me about how you plant seeds.

Herb: Well, first I make sure the soil is moist.

Charlie: Uh-huh. And tell him how you do that.

Herb: Well, I just stick my finger in the old Mother Earth. If it comes up dry, I just whip out my hose and give it a good spritz.

Charlie: And then?

Herb: And then I carefully plant the seed in the soil.

Charlie: Carefully? Why carefully?

Herb: Because if you just fling that stuff around, half of it's wasted!

Charlie: You hear that, Alan? If you fling your seed around it gets wasted.

Alan: Fascinating. Let's just go.

Charlie: Now hold on, hold on... How do you feel about bushes, Herb?

Herb: Well, I like a full bush. The way God intended.

Charlie: I like 'em trimmed. What about you, Alan?

Alan: We're going! Bye Herb."

"Hammond: It does work, this sort of branding. This wizard's sleeve for instance. (holds up a literal sleeve from a wizard costume with a Ferrari logo on it)
 * Nice one (possibly unintentional, but who can tell?) from kid's show The Hoobs in the episode "Ba-Boom". When Iver finds out that that noise in his chest is actually his heart, the Hoobs all listen to each other's heartbeats. Groove sticks his 'ear' next to (female Hoob) Tula's chest and exclaims "Great ba-booms, Tula!"
 * Done in Top Gear in the form of Innocent Innuendo (after segueing from a discussion about car firms putting their badges on any old merchandise)

May: This pork sword... (holds up a fencing foil with a load of sausages speared on it)

Clarkson: This cock... (holds up a stuffed chicken with an Audi logo on it)

Hammond: Has it got four rings on it?

Clarkson: Yes it has! Put this cock in your wizard's sleeve."

"Clarkson: The nipple is off. The tube is in the hole.
 * They also pointed out the "minefield of double entendres" that cropped up when they made a kit car.

Clarkson: We'll be needing some pump.

May: You should feel it go stiff now.

Clarkson: Pump, man. Pump!

Hammond: Oh yeah, that much better. Yeah, that's hard."

"Clarkson: It's the most pitiable sight you can see.
 * Then there's the review of a car where they picture a situation where a family seating arrangement has the mother in the front seat with the kids and her husband sits in the back seat:

May: She's effectively saying "You've given me the baby, now get in the back!"

Hammond: Yep.

Clarkson: (bursts out laughing)"

"Titus: Dad, you're not in love with her. It's a heart attack rebound thing. It's the angina talking!
 * Cloudcuckoolander Dave from Titus thinks he hears these often. Or can make the audience make them. Papa Titus frequently makes them as well.

Dave: It TALKS?!"

"Castle: We should savor this moment and--
 * A Bit of Fry and Laurie straddles the line between this and Refuge in Audacity frequently. See attached: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2BjDmEhbPLY
 * There's a rather clever one in the Easter 2010 Jonathan Creek special - while talking about carpentry, The Vicar states "if I have a vice, it's to be screwed on the edge of a bench." before adding "that's got me into trouble on more than one occasion."
 * In the first episode of Castle there's the line "we could go to dinner, debrief each other"
 * And from season 3:

Beckett: Let's just stick it in and get it over with."

"Carter: I love it when you talk nerdy to me."
 * They were talking about a blank DVD that may or may not have evidence for a case on it.
 * In Eureka season 4:2, Dr. Grant is locked in Carter's jail cell and Andy greets Carter. Grant is staring in wonder at Andy for being a robot, and his final line in the scene is 'I'd love to see underneath your uniform.' (meaning he wants to see the mechanics). Andy doesn't even try to hide his comprehension of the innuendo by making a sidelong glance.
 * Also in the last episode of Season 3 we get this one:

"Al: I can't find the hole! (Peggy, nearby, flashes a shit-eating grin)"
 * Married With Children was quite generous with the double entendres, perhaps the funniest when Al and Jefferson are trying to assemble a work bench and Al is frustrated with trying to align two "L" brackets:

"Bill: Let's face it, for the next three years, we three are doomed to be bachelors gay. (puts his hand on Tim's shoulder, grinning) That's an idea, isn't it?"
 * In one episode of The Goodies, the lads' apartment are encased in concrete with no connection to the outside world. Tim, off-hand, mentions "building a better world for our children". Cue Bill explaining to him that they're not going to have any children, are they, culminating in this:

"Tim: (shocked) But a man isn't a man unless he exercises his right for fatherhood!
 * Also, later on:

Bill: You can exercise it all you want, mate, but it won't get you anywhere!"

"Mulder: (about handling evidence) Go ahead.
 * Mulder of The X-Files loves to do this to his stoic, uptight partner, Scully, because she gets visibly flustered by it. At least for the first few seasons. Then she just starts rolling her eyes and tuning him out. From "Syzygy":

Scully: No, you go ahead.

Mulder: Nono, be my guest. I know how much you like snapping on the latex."

"Scully: Snake handling... didn't learn that in Catechism class.
 * "Signs and Wonders":

Mulder: That's funny, I remember a couple of Catholic school girls that were experts at it."

"Scully: (about a gift Mulder had brought) Is that for me?
 * In "Empedocles", a very rare Scully double entendre back at Mulder:

Mulder: Yeah.

Scully: Nice package.

Mulder (bemused): Thank you."

"Mulder: I was merely extending a professional courtesy to her.
 * Another Scully example, from Fire:

Scully: Oh is that what you were extending?"

"Rose Marie: You have... such a big desk, Jack.
 * In Community episode Comparative Religion Jeff commends Pierce on not reacting to Shirley commenting on the Dean "shoving his PC-ness down my throat." Turns out the only reason was that Pierce didn't get it until Jeff pointed it out.
 * A 1974 telecast of Tattletales had the following question posited to the wives: "If I want something from my husband, to make sure I get 'yes' for an answer, I always approach him after he's had _______." (Gene Rayburn guest hosted that week as regular host Bert Convy was on the panel with his wife, so the question was posed a la Match Game.) Harvey Korman predicted his wife Donna would say "a drink." Donna's response: "It's either pizza or sex..." As the audience roared with laughter, Harvey topped it: "With or without sausage?"
 * In The Hollywood Squares, a lot of the "fake" answers were these.
 * In one episode of A Very Peculiar Practice, Doctor Rose Marie and the university director ("call me Jack... Rose") have a business conversation. The pauses, throaty voices and staring are an interesting addition.

Jack: [Pause] It is kinda big.

Rose Marie: I was wondering -- I know you're awfully busy -- but I thought you might come round to my flat one evening. [Laughs.] I know you'll think I'm silly, but I'd find it much less daunting there and we could really have a proper... talk."

"Jackie: I just came to get Michael. Come on.
 * Many of 3rd Rock From the Sun's episode titles are puns based on Dick Solomon's first name:
 * "Dick, Smoker"
 * "Assault With a Deadly Dick"
 * "Father Knows Dick"
 * "Much Ado About Dick"
 * "World's Greatest Dick"
 * "Gobble, Gobble, Dick, Dick"
 * "Will Work for Dick"
 * The 70s game show Match Game was notorious for these. And it got worse in the '90s remake.
 * Pick a segment-title from The Daily Show. Chances are pretty damn good that it's a Double Entendre.
 * In the That 70s Show episode "Jackie's Cheese Squeeze", Jackie feels neglected by his boyfriend, Kelso, and ends up kissing her boss at the mall where she works as a cheese maiden. Eric catches them, and later tortures Jackie by making double entendres in Kelso's presence:

Eric: Oh, no, stay! We're just gonna hang out and fool around. We all know how much you like to... fool around.

[...]

Eric: So, hey, Jackie, how's it going down at the cheese shop? You must be so tired from... giving it away at the mall.

[...]

Jackie: Come on, Michael, let's go!

Eric: No, let's stay! We could play Monopoly. Oh, but that wouldn't be much fun, since we all know that... Jackie cheats."

"Jack: It's the ultimate game. Jack Donaghy, playing with himself. It's a Jack-off."
 * At least a quarter of all the dialogue on 30 Rock is double entendres.
 * From season 6, Jack has realized that Liz has learned to talk business by watching his (Jack's) seminars. He is excited to be able to compete with someone who knows all the same tricks as him...


 * WKRP in Cincinnati - Les is going to do something drastic on hearing about a rumor. Jennifer warns him "Now Les, don't go off all half-cocked!" Les replies "I'm a newsman, Jennifer - I'm always fully cocked!" Jennifer gets a disturbing mental picture.
 * Law and Order UK: A forensic expert is describing the evidence found on a victim as "stuff you might find in your mattress". DS Matt Devlin promptly turns to CP Alesha Phillips and cracks, "Not in my mattress". Granted, he could always be merely disagreeing with the forensics guy, but the look he's giving her seems to indicate another reason he's mentioning his mattress. ..
 * The Two Ronnies had many of these. Ronnie Barker once said that the thing about a joke with two meanings is that it can only possibly have one meaning.

Music
"''But I really get her going
 * "Squeeze Box" with The Who. Pete Townsend says its just a song about a woman playing an accordion, deliberately written to invoke this effect.
 * The Bowling for Soup song "My Wena" is one long innuendo. They even make it obvious in the original version of the video with a woman in a penis costume. In the end, it's revealed that the entire song is about a Dachshund named Wena.
 * The ACDC song "Big Balls" is one unbroken double entendre -- as evidenced by the song's name.
 * Let's face it: Everything those guys have recorded since their first album has been some flavor of thinly veiled, squick-ily obvious sexual reference,
 * The album notes for Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap refers to Big Balls as "Not subtle enough to be a double entendre. It's more like a single entendre."
 * That said, performing most of the song in a hoity-toity accent adds to the fake subtlety, making the song even more hilarious for those who get it.
 * By Big & Rich, the entire song of "Save a Horse (Ride a Cowboy)". You read that right- the song is actually named Save a Horse (Ride a Cowboy).
 * The lyrics (and these are ACTUAL lyrics) "I'm a thoroughbred, that's what she said".
 * Bull Moose Jackson's "Big Ten Inch Record" (famously covered by Aerosmith) uses verse breaks to create double entendres:

When I whip out my big 10 inch

...

record of a band that plays the blues...''"

"Goooooooing Doooooown!"
 * Aerosmith's song "Love in an Elevator".

"''If I could say what I want to say
 * Look closely at the name of the album "Night in the Ruts".
 * Mike Mareen's "Don't Talk to the Snake". You probably know what "snake" means, and the lyrics may be interpreted as a warning against AIDS. This was in 1988, when the epidemic started to go public.
 * "Things I'll Never Say" by Avril Lavigne kinda plays on this too:

I'd say I want to blow you--away

and...

If I could say what I want to see

I want to see you go down--on one knee''"

"''I'm a shooting star leaping through the sky
 * The Queen song "Don't Stop Me Now" is just one big Double Entendre from start to finish.

Like a tiger, defying the laws of gravity

I'm a racing car passing by like Lady Godiva

I'm gonna go, go, go, there's no stopping me!''"

"Tonight I'm gonna have myself a real good time...
 * ... Maybe...
 * "Maybe"?

I'm gonna make a supersonic man out of you"

"I'm a sex machine ready to reload like an atom bomb, I'm 'bout to oh oh oh oh EXPLODE"
 * and more obvious

"''So why don't you blow me...
 * Similar to the Dewey Cox example, Bob and Tom have a song that goes "blow me... a kiss as you're leaving".
 * Similar to this example, "The Sharpest Lives" by My Chemical Romance...

A kiss before she goes''"

"''And you probably already think I am full of
 * "Wanna B Ur Lovr" by Weird Al is made entirely of these, with a few just out there compliments thrown in. (Yugoslavian hands?)
 * Just look at the lyrics to "Today's Lesson" by Nick Cave & the Bad Seeds.
 * Songwriter Cole Porter was a master of the Double Entendre (as alluded to in one example above). His songs "Love For Sale" and "But In The Morning, No" were once banned from radio because of their heavy use of Double Entendre.
 * Rihanna's "Shut Up and Drive."
 * The entire song "Polka Dot Undies" by Bowser and Blue.

Vague innuendos and double-meanin' rhymes.

But I'll tell you that obscenity is all in your

Polka-dot undies!''"

"''I'm coming... coming on strong
 * It might be intentional in the Isley Brother's song "Between the Sheet" besides the "I like the way you receive me" and "I love the way you relieve me" lines which you can only take that one way, several times he says

In between the sheets''"

"''Big bottom, big bottom
 * Those of us with more esoteric taste in music will know that many, many '20s and '30s blues songs contain double entendres, such as Blind Boy Fuller's "Let Me Squeeze Your Lemon", The Memphis Jug Band's "Memphis Yo Yo Blues", Blind Lemon Jefferson's "Black Snake Moan", and my personal favorite, Bessie Smith's "I Need a Little Sugar In My Bowl".
 * Judy Henske sings a song about a man who is a 'deep sea diver whose stroke can't go wrong.' Not only that, but 'he can touch the bottom, and his wind holds out so long'
 * Jimmy Buffett has admitted that he specifically wrote his song "Why Don't We Get Drunk And Screw", which is about, well, getting drunk and screwing, because he was sick and tired of hearing double entendres in other people's songs.
 * Spinal Tap's "Big Bottom".

Talk about a bum case, my girl's got 'em

Big bottom, drives me out of my mind

How can I leave this behind?''"

"''I wanna kiss her but... she won't let me
 * Tim Cavanagh's novelty country ballad, "I Wanna Kiss Her".

I wanna whisper sweet nothings in herrrrr... ear

I wanna hold her behind... closed doors and more''"

"It doesn't do anything, it just sits there, and looks at me."
 * "Foxtrot Uniform Charlie Kilo" by the Bloodhound Gang is made up of double entendres, and ends with the line "put the you know what in the you know where". The video for the song is also ripe with Visual Innuendo. One of the images shown is Bam Margera driving a giant banana-shaped car into a tunnel. Nearly all of their songs contain double entendres, seeing as nearly all of them are about sex. Other prominent examples are "Fire Water Burn" and "Uhn Tiss Uhn Tiss Uhn Tiss".
 * The song and music video "Gay Bar" by Electric Six is rife with both this and Visual Innuendo.
 * Half their songs are either blatantly about sex ("I wanna make it last forever" said twelve times, getting higher and higher, before ending with "Ooh baby"), or more subtle innuendo. Broken Machine includes the lyrics:

"''I can save you from
 * "Bite Me" deserves special notice, as the verses are almost completely dedicated to euphemisms for fellatio...which makes the title a bit disturbing in hindsight.
 * A certain song by Lords of Acid leaves it entirely up to the listener to decide whether they're singing about a cat or the female anatomy.
 * Jason Mraz's "Geek in the Pink" has more than a few, the most prominent being:

Unoriginal dum-dums

Who wouldn't care if you come... plete them or not!''"

"''You be the target on the bed
 * Would you believe, Justin Timberlake's already explicit "Dick in a Box"? Aaaaaand... THERE. You just got it.
 * Does it count for a double entendre if the title explains the joke?
 * Alice Cooper, among other songs, had I'm Your Gun. Even though you probably know what's coming, a brief example:

I'll be shootin' hot lead''"

"''I can do it on water, I can do it on dry land
 * Richard & Linda Thompson's song "Hokey Pokey" is ostensibly about ice cream, but features enough references to 'putting it your mouth' to make its meaning clear.
 * Melanie's "Brand New Key".
 * '40s novelty singer Benny Bell, in addition to his famous subverted-rhyme hit "Shaving Cream", composed ditties with such piquant titles as "My Grandpa Had a Long One", "Everybody Wants My Fanny", and "I'm Gonna Give My Girl a Goose for Thanksgiving".
 * The Beatles had several: "Please Please Me", "Drive My Car", "Norwegian Wood", "Happiness Is a Warm Gun".
 * The original title was "Happiness is a Warm Gun in your Hand".
 * "My Ding-A-Ling" by Chuck Berry.
 * 2pac's "Me & My Girlfriend".
 * Poe's "Angry Johnny". Could be about homicide. Could be about something else:

I can do it with instruments, I can do it with my own two hands

But either way, either way you'll know where it stands

I'm gonna kill you, I'm gonna blow you... away''"

"''Throw in all your dirty clothes, all your dirty duds
 * The last line of Tenacious D's "Wonderboy" goes "There, that crevasse; fill it with your mighty juice." Hmm, wonder what that might be...
 * Knorkators "Song of the horse" might be a completely innocent song about the deep friendship between the vocalist and his horse. But since there is no actual reference to a horse in the lyrics, it might also be entirely about sex.
 * 50s song "Laundromat Blues" by 5 Royales:

Don't worry about no soap, her machine is full of suds

She's got the best machine

The best washing machine in town (ooh-wee what a machine!)

Just relax and take it easy

As the machine goes round and round''"

"''Let's have some fun, this beat is sick
 * Lady Gaga has several, but probably the most obvious one is Love Game:

I wanna take a ride on your disco stick''"

"''I got a big ego, (hahaha)
 * Britney Spears has a song called If You Seek Amy, which, if annunciated, gives a very interesting suggestion
 * Long before that song was ever out, April Wine had "If You See Kay"
 * "Ego" by Kanye West and Beyonce. Three guesses what his ego is.

I?m such a big ego, (hahaha)

I got a big, (hahaha), Ego,

She love my big, (hahaha), Ego,

So stroke my big, (hahaha), Ego''"

"''She said there's
 * Knowing Kanye, he could very well just be talking about his actual ego.
 * XTC's "Pink Thing". According to its writer, Andy Partridge, it was written to express his love and pride for his newborn son. But the lyrics could just as easily be interpreted as a man's ode to his penis.
 * Paul and Storm's "The Captain's Wife's Lament", about the complaints of a sea captain's wife after he lets his entire crew stay in their home.

Seamen all around the bed

And seamen on the floor

Seamen in the bathroom

And behind the closet door''"

"''Well I'm not the world's most masculine man
 * Steven Curtis Chapman's song "Remembering You", written about Narnia but could also be about Jesus.
 * As could Narnia itself, natch.
 * The Kinks' "Lola". Is the title character an unusually mannish woman, or a male transvestite?

But I know what I am and I'm glad I'm a man

And so is Lola''"

"''How'd you like to find this waiting at home for you every night?
 * "Walt Whitman's Niece", written by Woody Guthrie and recorded by Billy Bragg with Wilco, has several of these in its lyrics.
 * The song "If I Can't Sell It" by Ruth Brown is chock full of them. Ostensibly about a furniture store owner lambasting a cheap customer for refusing to pay the marked price for a chair, the song is full of goodies like this:

Only been used once or twice, but it's still nice and tight!''"

""I pulled into a Shell station...they said I'd blown a seal. I said, 'Fix the damn thing and leave my private life out of it, okay, pal?'""
 * The funk group Here Come The Mummies have an album entitles 'Single Entendre', referencing their frequently overtly sexual lyrics.
 * After Dark, a swedish band has the song "Åh när ni"("Oh, when you"), and just to get you a tip of what kind of what type of double entendres we're in for, the song title is very similar in pronunciation to onani (masturbation). The entire song consists of famous tv-show host doing stuff they do in their shows... but with a clear second meaning. Examples include a female chef poking about on the button on her hot air oven, and a car show host "oiling his lever". Here it is.
 * Les Sucettes, written by Serge Gainsbourg for France Gall, like many of Gainsbourg's songs, is full of this. It's special however, as the singer, who was 17(!) at the time, took a year to have a Swiss Moment to associate lollipops with oral sex. She was pissed.
 * In a rare, non-sexual version, the cover for Rush's Moving Pictures is a triple entendre. There are people moving pictures, people finding the pictures moving emotionally, and somebody making a moving picture of the scene.
 * Cheer Up Charlie Daniels does this a lot.
 * Rodney Carrington's song "Fred" features a cowboy, his horse, and his lady love, all named Fred. The chorus is "Fred's a-ridin', Fred's a-ridin' Fred, Fred's ridin' Fred, Fred's ridin' Fred. Fred's ridin' Fred" and admits of any interpretation from the completely innocent to the unspeakably kinky.
 * "The Stroke" by Billy Squier - thought to be about masturbation.
 * An alternate interpretation suggests it's an indictment of the music industry.
 * Kip Adotta's "Wet Dream" is a double entendre by title alone and is full of undersea puns and double entendres:

"Nobody comes knocking at my front door.
 * "Nobody Makes A Pass At Me":

What do they think my knocker's for?"


 * The Hungarian rapper Sub Bass Monster's song 4 ütem (4 phases) has lyrics that are equally suitable at describing the workings of an internal combustion engine and being a needlessly over-complicated description of smoking, to hilarious effect.
 * Katy Perry's "Peacock" song, although it barely hides the meaning. Hint: if you don't get it right away, split the word into two words. Now what?......and, no, it's not about an exotic bird.
 * "California Gurls" also has a phallic entendre: "Sun-kissed skin, so hot, we'll melt your popsicle".
 * Lots of traditional British folk songs. The "Bonny Black Hare" starts off with the singer aiming his "gun" at a "black hare" that's hidden under a woman's skirt. During the second verse, it abandons this metaphor and is just them having sex. "The Cuckoo's Nest" (recorded by Steeleye Span as "Drink Down The Moon") is just as bad ("I'll give any lass a shilling and a bottle of the best/Just to rumple up the feathers of her cuckoo's nest"). For more of this sort of thing, see Bawdy Song.
 * Billy Joel's song "Christie Lee" is about a saxophone player who meets a woman at his gig, who is impressed by his skill and comes home with him so he can "perform" for her. In case it wasn't clear, we get this lyric: "He couldn't see that Christie Lee was a woman/who didn't need another lover; all she wanted was the sax!"
 * ACDC's "The Jack", (at least in it's original album form) is ostensibly about a poker game, but with lines like 'How was I to know that she'd been shuffled before... said she'd never had a royal flush' and 'She was holding a pair, but I had to try...' and 'She'd have the cards to bring me down, if she played them right' its clearly about something else.
 * It's not about that, it's about this.
 * Queen's "I'm In Love With My Car" is either a sex euphemism (this is Queen after all) or it's a Car Song that even Richard 'Oliver!' Hammond would find a bit worrying: 'Such a clean machine, With the pistons a pumpin' And the hub caps all gleam'.
 * Get this: it was originally meant to be played straight. The song was written by Roger Taylor in honour of a roadie whose Triumph TR-4 was the centre of his life. Whether it's also a poke at guys who let their hobbies take over their lives is another question entirely, but given that the song was written by Roger Taylor it's probably not a terribly deep euphemism. The best part about the song is that Taylor locked himself into a cupboard until the rest of the band agreed to make the song the B-side to the "Bohemian Rhapsody" single. He did that because although singles were sold based on the A-side content, the writers of the A-side song and the B-side song shared the royalties earned on the single.
 * "If a guy messes with me I shoot him with my load / All over his chest and face and down his throat..."
 * Similar to "Christie Lee" is "Bodhráns on the Brain" by Black 47.
 * "I told her to skin a goat/And take it back to my place ... we hammered away relentlessly until the dawn" indeed.

"Swingin' in there 'cause
 * The Bryan Adams song "Summer of 69" is not about the year 1969.
 * One of the infamous deal-breakers that caused H Ea RT to leave their first label, Mushroom Records, was an deliberately controversial ad for Dreamboat Annie they published without consulting the Wilson sisters, with double entendres insinuating they were lesbian sister lovers. The headline read "It Was Our First Time". This embarrassment, and the heckling they endured not long after by chauvinistic male executives at a label showcase, were the inspiration being one of their toughest rockers, "Barracuda" (referring to the "barracuda" tour jackets the hecklers wore).
 * Every single one of Blood On The Dance Floor's songs have these kinds of jokes. Every goddamn one of them. No exceptions. And none of them are at all subtle.
 * Are You Experienced from The Jimi Hendrix Experience is one where two meanings are sexual; "experienced" could be either a adjective or a verb.
 * Brian Hyland's Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weeny Yellow Polka Dot Bikini sounds like it's about a bashful teenage girl in said outfit. It was actually about Brian's 2-year-old (at the time) daughter.
 * "Fish" by Craig Campbell has a bunch, including "I had everything we needed in the bed of my truck / Turns out my baby loves to... / Fish, she wants to do it all the time", "And I love how she looks with that rod in her hand", "With her hooks and her sinkers and her pretty pink bobbers", etc.
 * Warrant's "Cherry Pie" has several of these:

She wanted me to feed her

So I mixed up the batter

And she licked the beater!"

News

 * When Swiss football team Young Boys Bern hosted an extravagant homecoming party to celebrate the opening of their new stadium, the Stade de Suisse Wankdorf ("Wankdorf" being the name of a suburb of Bern), the resulting ESPN Soccernet headline read Young Boys Wankdorf erection relief.

Radio
"Hamish: Are you up for it?
 * Scoring girl Samantha from BBC Radio 4 show I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue owns this Trope, having had it for almost 40 years...
 * In Search of Mornington Crescent features a spoof cricket commentry in which No Celebrities Were Harmed versions of Johnston and Blofeld discuss a cricketer called Geoffrey Hiscock, including such lines as "It was a bold decision for Gardner to open the batting with Hiscock" and "Hiscock is out! And the umpire is pointing Hiscock towards the pavillion." And so on...
 * Clue's spin-off, You'll Have Had Your Tea, is another major offender. For instance, when Dougal's entered a "Macathalon":

Dougal: Not the night before a Macathalon.

Hamish: But are you having misgivings?

Dougal: Not the night before a Macathalon!

Hamish: Well, I'll be right behind you.

Both: Not the night before a Macathalon...

Hamish: But, looky here. Do you think you can pull it off?

[long pause]

Dougal: Yes."

"Princess Sally: Oh, you're not really Jewish. You're just saying you are.
 * And the original show which Clue was spun off of, I'm Sorry Ill Read That Again, also did it on occassion, using radio for full ambiguity. IIRC, from Black Cinderella 2 Goes East:

Prince Charming: But I am! Wait, I'll show you! Hang on while I get it out! (rustling sound) There! You can't get much more Jewish than that, can you?

Princess Sally: ...That doesn't prove anything. Anyone can buy a skullcap."

"Jenny: But that's horrifying!
 * The Reduced Shakespeare Company Radio Show has a rap song about William Shakespeare's characters and their need to practice safe sex: "Rap Your Willy!"
 * A staple of Round the Horne. At one point, Horne and Williams break character so that Horne can express his concern that the audience may be seeing a second meaning in what they say; Williams replies "Second meaning? Them? They don't even see the first meaning -- they just laugh at anything that might be dirty."
 * A staple of all BBC Radio comedy, ever. On programme featured a spoof letter from someone objecting to the amount of double entendre on the airwaves, saying "I don't wish sex to be forced down my throat. It leaves a nasty taste in my mouth, and I'm not swallowing it."
 * In a spoof technothriller on Saturday Night Fry, Stephen Fry's character, Dr Fordyce, discovers a secret formula that transforms him into a woman (Jenny, played by Emma Thompson), but turns Hugh Laurie's character into Barry Cryer (played by himself). Amongst his strange Barry Cryer powers is the ability to turn anything into a Double Entendre.

Barry Cryer: It is horrifying, isn't it? I'll put it away. There, you see what I mean? A lewd ambiguity for every occasion.

Jenny: You're having me on.

Barry Cryer: No, but it's an idea.

Jenny: And you can keep this up indefinitely?

Barry Cryer: Are you sure you want me to answer that?"

"Barry: I'd like the rest of this programme to be of a totally pure and innocent nature...but, as that won't get any laughs, let's do a rude joke!
 * Often used on Hello Cheeky. Frequently lampshaded.

Tim: Look at those tits! ...Oh, one of them's flown away."

Theater
""Behind the bushes and it's done. One-two-three and it's done. Here's the money. Thanks. Come again. Hah-hah! Come again!""
 * Naturally, William Shakespeare's career was built on this. And iambic pentameter. Sadly this is often obscured by the associations people make between Shakespeare, snooty English professors, and snooty Victorian aristocracy, as well as shifts in word meaning.
 * In Othello, it is noted that Othello and Desdemona "are making the beast with two backs." Next time someone uses that euphemism or some variant, you can tell them it's over four hundred years old.
 * The musical Chicago is rife with this trope. One song in particular, "When You're Good to Mama" has the ambiguously lesbian warden of the women's jail delivering double entendres at every other line. Perhaps even triple -- they succeed in being Unusual Euphemisms for both sex and money. Additionally, a song absent from the film is "Baby and Me", which is full of double non-sexual entendres: "I can assure you, it won't go away / I can assure you, it grows every day;" is Roxie singing about the baby she's supposedly carrying, or about the lie she's now living?
 * The Barrison Sisters was a vaudeville group in the 1890s. In their most famous act, the sisters would dance, raising their skirts slightly above their knees, and ask the audience, "Would you like to see my pussy?" When they had coaxed the audience into an enthusiastic response, they would raise up their skirts, revealing that each sister was wearing underwear of their own manufacture that had a live kitten secured over the crotch.
 * In Oh Dad, Poor Dad, Mama's Hung You in the Closet and I'm Feelin' So Sad, Rosalie admits with a smirk that she indeed lets men do anything they like to her:

"Hanschen: I'll walk with you, Ernst.
 * "Baptize Me" fromTheBookOfMormon turned this into a 4 minute Running Gag to see how many Double Entendres could be put together. Considering that the play was written by the two guys responsible for South Park along with one of the guys from Avenue Q this should shock nobody.
 * Keating The Musical :"I wanna do you slo-owly, holy moly..." Based on a real Paul Keating quote...
 * The lyrics in Spring Awakening are full of them. There are a few notable examples in dialogue, too, such as:

Ernst: You will?

Hanschen: We'll huddle over the Homer. Maybe do a little Achilles and Patroclus."


 * The famous "china" scene from the Restoration Comedy The Country Wife. The title The Country Wife is a triple entendre.
 * "The Tennis Song" in City of Angels.
 * As everyone knows by now, the Double Entendre was Mae West's stock in trade. The Pleasure Man was one of several of her 1920s plays raided for obscenity, and the censors took note of such lines as a Drag Queen offering "I get down on my knees" as a description of his act and an observing couple calling such performers "extraordinarily queer."

Video Games
"Maya: You really love to show that thing off, don't you? Who knows how many times you've shown it to me?
 * Bulletstorm is to First Person Shooters what Bayonetta is to third person beat-em-ups. Observe:
 * One of the loading screen tips: "Reload often. No one likes getting down to business half-cocked."
 * 80-90% of the skillshot names. Including "Boned" for reducing a mook to a skeleton with a PMC charged shot to the groin, making that one a triple entendre.
 * The undisputed king of Double Entendres for Bulletstorm is the Penetrator, the most Freudian gun you will ever use. It fires rocket propelled drills.
 * Devil May Cry 4: "First, I whip it out!..."
 * And from Devil May Cry 3 before that, the Monster Clown calls the Temen-ni-Gru tower a "thick shaft that causes women to shudder".
 * Devil May Cry 3 also has what could be seen as a visual double entendre: in the cutscene before the Nevan battle, there's a part where Dante grabs the hem of his pants (which apparently confused people who'd played God of War) and then whips out Rebellion. Rebellion is a sword. Hmm...
 * Kyrie's "She yearns for your touch!" line to Nero in Devil May Cry 4, considering how sweet and chaste she comes off.
 * The Ace Attorney games feature their share of Double Entendres. In case 3 of Justice for All, a heavy bust of defendant Maximillion Galactica is used as a piece of evidence, which leads to Phoenix using the phrase "Max Galactica's ample bust" in the courtroom.
 * This conversation between Phoenix and Maya in one case. They're talking about his Attorney's badge.

Phoenix: She's right. I whip it out at the drop of a hat."

"April May: I like a man with a big... vocabulary.
 * "Mr. Wellington loves large bananas" in the 2nd game.
 * In the first game.

Phoenix Wright: I'll get to this woman's bottom! Er, you know what I mean..."

"Kaidan: If things don't go well, I want you to know - I've enjoyed serving under you.
 * And there was a lot of talk between Apollo and Ema about Ema's "tool"...
 * And way too many more to count.
 * Ashe in Mega Man ZX Advent: "Now that your appetites are whet for booty..."
 * This scene from Ar Tonelico.
 * EVERYTHING dealing with a Reyvateil is a double entendre.
 * Pursuing Mass Effect's Romance Sidequest with Kaidan Alenko creates what is probably an unintentional Double Entendre; asking Kaidan for "personal input" after all new conversational options have been exhausted causes Kaidan to reply that "There'll be time for personal debriefings later", a comment that sounds innocent at first but collects more and more of a double meaning the more he and Shepard flirt with one another.
 * If that's not enough, there's a very intentional Double Entendre possible in the scene which culminates the Romance Sidequest:

Shepard: Kaidan, I don't think I've had the pleasure of you serving under me yet."

"Gianna Parasini: I love nailing asari. They act so ageless and superior, but when you finally catch them, they squeal like schoolgirls."
 * The sequel has a few.

"Not necessarily, since Asari are an entirely different species, so it's feasible that a person could be attracted to gender A of species A, but not gender B. (Though Asari only have one gender) The flirtatious dialogue she has with Male Shep. makes her out to be the sort of person who might make a suggestive comment like this as well, though it's such a minor event compared to the scope of the series that it doesn't really matter."
 * That probably was unintentional, considering that she only shows attraction towards male Shepard.

""You know me, I like to savor the last shot before popping the heat sink. ...Wait, that metaphor just went somewhere horrible.""
 * There's also Garrus' Romance Sidequest. He suggests you two take it slow.

""If it's too quiet for you to sleep, I can find you someplace louder...""
 * Mass Effect 3 gives us Shepard's remark to Tali on welcoming her back to the Normandy if the two were involved in the second game.

"Joshua: Step one is gathering info, starting with the client. Honestly, Neku. This is basic stuff.
 * In Super Paper Mario, tattle a Hammer/Boomerang/Fire Bro and then try to explain that the localization team wasn't thinking something dirty.
 * Joshua's intentional "You watch my behind, and I'll watch yours" line in The World Ends With You.
 * There's also this exchange.

Neku: (Yoshiya Kiryu, private dick extraordinaire.)"

"SUPER ROBOT TAISEN® OG SAGA: ENDLESS FRONTIER? SPILLS OUT ONTO NINTENDO DS? We like keeping you abreast of new developments in the world of Atlus, Faithful. That's why we're practically bursting at the seams to reveal Super Robot Taisen® OG Saga: Endless Frontier for Nintendo DS. As a continuation of the Atlus Spoils fan appreciation program, each and every launch copy of Super Robot Taisen OG Saga: Endless Frontier will be a premium boxed release, with a bonus soundtrack CD featuring music from the game included in the final retail package. My friends, this is one stacked action RPG. Contrasting the deep story and characterizations is the fast-paced, fighter-style combat engine. Juggling your opponent in the air, chaining together combos, using your entire party in concert... these may not be your typical RPG combat concepts, but with the quick, responsive battles in Endless Frontier, they're the name of the game. Behind the fighter mechanics are all of the nuanced RPG fixings genre fans have come to expect. We'd like to emphasize: this game is more than just the fights. This is a fully-developed, well-rounded adventure. Journey across a variety of worlds, ranging from an apocalyptic wasteland covered with the hulks of downed spaceships, to a fantastical place of fairy tales and dark magic. Join Haken Browning: gunslinger, professional bounty hunter, and amateur ladies' man-along with his motley crew of robots, were-beasts, secret agents, and busty princesses-as they delve deep into the mysteries of how their worlds came to be and face a threat that imperils the multiverse. There's so much game here, Faithful, you may just get lower back pain from the effort! With its unique combat and titillating story, this is one sci-fi action RPG sure to stick out this spring."
 * When Super Robot Wars OG Saga: Endless Frontier was announced to have a US release, Atlus' promotional messages were FILLED with innuendos. The message goes like this:

"EVA: I can't believe how small it is.
 * The actual in-game dialogue has even more of them. Or, to be more precise -- about 3/4 of dialogue is innuendo, to the point when Haken has to explain that when he said "She uses bombs" he meant explosives.
 * There's also Garnet. Everything she says in combat is a double-entendre of some sort.
 * Destroy All Humans Big Willy Unleashed is one big double entendre. The plot involves Pox founding a hot dog stand named "Big Willy's", a parody of the real-life "Bob's Big Boy" franchise. Kolonel Kluckin, owner/proprietor of Kluckin's Kitchen, is trying to run Pox out of business, and hires a kidnapped and supposedly brainwashed rich heiress named "Patty Wurst". She attacks Pox's restaurant, to which Pox exclaims "She's hammering my Big Willy!" It goes on like this.
 * Metal Gear Solid has plenty of them; for instance Ocelot's "I love to reload during a battle. There's nothing like slamming a long silver bullet into a well-greased chamber." from the first Metal Gear Solid is a rather obvious one.
 * Just what else could Solid Snake mean? He spends the whole damn series around women that wear clothes that they can't do up properly. Oh, and he's an old man by the fourth game.
 * Well, now we know why Liquid was always so pissed off...
 * In MGS3, if you don't, you will see a minute-long cutscene that consists almost entirely of this.

Snake: Yeah, but it gets the job done."

""While you were hiding behind the barricades in Leningrad, the enemy was thrusting deep into the motherland's tender nether regions!""
 * Portal: "Speedy thing comes in, speedy thing goes out", anyone?
 * Non-Sexual one: Lunacy Achievement.
 * Double Entendres practically exploded in the video game fandom once Nintendo's new console was named "Wii". Most of the jokes have stopped.
 * But now they are back in full force once Nintendo started to make Wiis and the controllers in the color black.
 * Command and Conquer: Red Alert 3 had one in the Soviet campaign, where General Krukov will berate you with an entendre.

""We will pound your little island, until you weep for mercy.""
 * Pay attention to Dasha's eyebrows when he says that, the bets off that you did the same thing.
 * This little gem in the Allied campaign, when he confidently introduces himself to the Allied commander.

"Kokonoe: I've been thinking of putting it on your chest... or your GIGANTIC TAGER!!!!
 * Also the Hammer tank. "Who needs a good pounding?"
 * Grand Theft Auto. Rockstar North is a master inserting double entendres into any fictional item under the sun, from cars, to chocolate bars, to names such as the "The Big Pecker", Juank Air, Burger Shot or ilovetoblow.org, to an advertising in Grand Theft Auto Liberty City Stories promoting croquet. To list all of them would require a page of its own.
 * "Kids, come and play. I got puppies to show you."
 * And then there's the prevalence of the number 69 since Grand Theft Auto San Andreas.
 * In World of Warcraft the Reputation grind for the Sons of Hodir faction requires you to complete the following quests every day; Blowing Hodir's Horn, Polishing the Helm and Thrusting Hodir's Spear.
 * The enemy in X3: Reunion is called the Kha'ak. And yes, it's pronounced like you think it is. Cue G4TV's hilarious review laden with hard and blown Kha'ak.
 * Baldurs Gate has quite a lot of them. Jan has a bunch of stories that are chock full (something about Golodon the Unmanned losing his rod?) Edwin occasionally interjects them into his dialogue and then there's the entire sidequest concerning the three pantaloons that give you the Big Metal Unit...
 * In Blaz Blue, an experiment performed by Professor Kokonoe on Iron Tager ended with this exchange:

Tager: Uh, no thanks, Kokonoe. I don't think I need that kind of... um... "enhancment"."

"Noel: Miss Kokonoe, what were you planning to do to Mr. Ragna the Bloodedge after you put him to sleep?
 * Taken a step further with Rachel's Gag Ending, where Ragna gains an Unwanted Harem:

Kokonoe: Ah, yes. Well, no reason not to tell you. First, I intended to take his INFERNO DIVIDER and put it in a CARNAGE SCISSORS with maybe a little GAUNTLET HADES too? Huh, my goodness, I can only imagine what his HELL'S FANG will DEAD SPIKE.

Noel: Wh-wha- WHAT!?"

"Sully: Should be this way. Just follow the hose.
 * Everything said by the Black Baron (stop staring) in Mad World. Especially when he refers to giving targets "head" when you're hitting heads into targets with a golf club.
 * Uncharted 2 gives us this exchange.

Nate: You always "follow the hose". Just like in Montreal.

Sully: Never gonna let me forget that, are you?"

"Ruby: The store is named after my clothing racks, smartass."
 * The title of every single Ratchet and Clank game after the first. "Going Commando" referring to both nudity and actually being a commando, "Up Your Arsenal" referring to it having more weapons, and to top it off, the latest game's name was almost "Clock Blockers."
 * Actually, only about half the Ratchet & Clank titles have done this- Going Commando, Up Your Arsenal, Size Matters, and Quest for Booty.
 * In Gaia Online, there is a clothing store named "Ruby's Rack", run by a single mother in a skimpy dress.

"Cindy Donovinh: It's... huge! I can't believe the size of it, towering into the stratosphere like that... It's like nothing I've ever seen!
 * Meanwhile, Sam has no idea what's so funny about a car shop named "Sam's Body & Parts".
 * And in the Promageddon event manga:

Edmund: *Aside Glance* That's What She Said"

"Barry: Do you have any idea what Wesker was going to show you in the back of this place?
 * Do y'all know what 'suck the heads' means?
 * I mean, it ain't nothin' bad. It's about eatin'.
 * The QUALITY voice acting in the Resident Evil series means that a fair number of lines that wouldn't usually sound like double entendre end up sounding exactly like that. A golden example from the end of the original version of the game that started it all:

Jill: Well, he was talking about the world's most powerful biological weapon... called "TYRANT" or something.

Barry: Do you think we could see... TYRANT... now?"

""Watch this! It's filling me up! That was... titillating!""
 * This one becomes even more Hilarious in Hindsight when you play Resident Evil 5 and realize that Wesker's goal is Complete. Global. Saturation.
 * Dissidia Final Fantasy is filled to the brim with these, though some cross over to being text instead of subtext. A particularly obvious example is Kefka's EX-burst monologue:

""Don't look! I've got a split in my pants!"
 * Duke Nukem's Balls of Steel quote. He says it in front of a pinball machine but it's clear he also means he has balls of steel.
 * Many lines from Star Fox 64 can be interpreted this way, especially if you take it out of context or apply unnecessary censorship.
 * Why don't you come down here, Falco?
 * Jeez Leweez, what is that?!
 * We can catch up later, Fox.
 * When I was playing Animal Crossing, a discussion between two of the animals went like this:

"You aren't wearing pants... so what split?"

"Um... gotta go!""


 * Also, another time they said "*town name*, we got trees! And people and houses and the birds and bees"! Now, we all know what "the birds and bees" mean...
 * Pokémon Black and White has a Dating Sim-esque sequence: After defeating your date in a Pokémon battle, you go with said date on a ferris wheel. Your date's dialogue is positively laced with double entendres, especially from one of Hilbert's dates, a burly Hiker.
 * The tutorial quest of Dungeons and Dragons Online has the rogue catch up to your party and say to your female cleric leader, "Don't worry, Cellimas, I'm here to watch your behind now!"
 * In Wing Commander III, every single conversation between Blair and potential Love Interest Rachel is chock full of these. Perhaps not coincidentally, Rachel is played by porn star Ginger Lynn, and porno dialogue is notorious for this trope.
 * Shameless Otaku Daru from Steins Gate has a talent for instantly noticing whenever something a female character says can be misconstrued out of context and asking them to repeat it for him. Prime examples include "Put the banana in", and "Maybe that hole is too tight!"
 * In Red Dead Redemption, practically everything the prostitutes say is Double Entendre. See here.
 * In Starcraft II, the SCV pilot sometimes exclaims, "In the rear, with the gear!"
 * Although in the military, that expression is routinely used to denote non-combat personnel who are removed from the front lines. Given the propensity of vulgar expressions and double entendres in the military lexicon, this example is usually played straight by comparison.
 * In The Elder Scrolls series (at least in Oblivion and Skyrim) there's an in-game book by the name of The Lusty Argonian Maid. You can read excerpts from this book, and they are full of double entendres (especially the second volume).
 * In Morrowind, You meet the author of The Lusty Argonian Maid, Crassius Curio. Unsuprisingly, His unique dialogues contain quite a few sexual entendres.
 * Morrigan victory line in the Capcom Vs series are practically intended to come off as this.

Webcomics
"Elan: Roy has boobies!"
 * The Optimist tries to swallow a hot load of double entendres in this strip.
 * Monsterful has some from time to time, but this one deserves a special mention.
 * The definitive example, courtesy of Order of the Stick strip helpfully entitled "It's a Type of Boat". Lampshaded at the end courtesy of Belkar in his prison cell, referencing a line from Star Wars.
 * The discussion thread dedicated to that strip took the joke even further. Apparently, a horse isn't dead so long as you can beat it. *whistles innocently*
 * Also, Roy has "great cleavage".

"Dora: It's ok, it's perfectly normal to have performance anxiety your first time.
 * The strip titled "Double Your Entendre, Double Your Fun".
 * "My junk is for the people."
 * Roy's sister is True Neutral: she goes both ways.
 * These are just the tip of the iceberg.
 * Another webcomic example: It's Walky! based a small ARC around this, featuring the local Will They or Won't They? couple. This strip may just be a standing record for "Most Double Entendres in a a Single Strip"...
 * See Loserz, especially if the... working place of the protagonists is involved. As in this strip.
 * This one is the best.
 * Pokémon X runs on this trope. It's funny because the source material really does provide so much fuel for it...
 * This one from VG Cats is a beaut.
 * This fan comic is even better.
 * And probably VG Cats' crowner, this one composed entirely of dialogue snippets from Star Fox 64.
 * This entire Questionable Content strip. (In case you're wondering, they were dancing.)
 * A classic double subversion can be found here.

Marten: Yeah, like, the first time I ever played guitar in front of people? IMPOSSIBLE to maintain an erection."

""I remember taking my turn with you more than once that evening"."
 * In Exterminatus Now, Eastwood learns online how to create a robotic attack chicken. When he has it attempting to tear out Lothar's throat, guess what he refers to it as.
 * Blur the Lines likes to play around with these, though one stands out thanks to being about snow.
 * In The Dreamer, Alexander says this comment to Beatrice:


 * In Something Positive there is this strip,, which is actually a nice subversion of the trope (the second- and third-last panels).
 * Jane's last line in this Everyday Heroes strip.
 * Exiern had a three-pager titled "Cheating Death". The (NSFW) middle page shows how the title is a Double Entendre.
 * Karate Bears carpet matches the drapes joke
 * Dominic Deegan practically lives on this trope, but Szark Sturtz has one of the best examples.
 * Jet Dream is presented in the Retraux style of a comic book that might theoretically have been approved by the Comics Code Authority circa 1970, if they could buy the basic Gender Bender premise. Thus, almost all references to sex are veiled ones.

Web Original
"Tucker: Bow chicka bow wow."
 * In The Gamers Alliance, the amnesiac Ronove's ramblings are often taken the wrong way. On one occasion he asks if he can taste Ax's cherry pie. He actually wants to trade pie recipes with her and isn't thinking of anything sexual, but everyone around them misunderstands the conversation. Hilarity Ensues.
 * Sarah of Lonely Girl 15 often uses these. An example is her "vote Salinas" routine in "Casting Couch": "Hey, there. I was wondering if you'd be interested in hearing about a man named Edward Salinas. He's the man with the plan and it's a big one. Oh, it surely is! He wants to build a stronger community. The strongest, firmest, hardest community..."
 * The Rooster Teeth logo is a visual double entendre that you only pick up when your humor is in the gutter. I can't be the only who is reminded of the endearing insult "cockbite" they commonly use in Red vs. Blue, whenever they show a picture of a rooster and teeth.

"Simmons: Okay, Lopez, you take the front.
 * While getting away from Red Base, Simmons takes command of the group, which includes Lopez the Spanish-speaking robot, and Donut, the unambiguously gay Private in pink (lightish red) armor:

Donut: And I'll handle your rears!

Simmons: Okay, change of plans: Donut, you're in the middle.

Donut: It'll be a Donut sandwich, mm-mm!

Simmons: Ugh! You can ruin anything!"

""Are you ready to contend with what's in my pants?"
 * "Simmons, I am having a blast going in and out of your hole!"
 * If doing a NaviGTR/Flights of Fantasy Retsupurae, Diabetus says a joke with one of these that is related to the game that George Wood is reviewing in his best Bill Clinton impersonation.

"After I play Buster Brothers I'm gonna bust a nut!"

"I'll show you why they call me Big Dong Donkey Kong."

"Look in my pants and I'll show you why they call it the Playstation.""

""Powerthirst now comes in WOMEN!""
 * A line from College Humor's "Powerthirst 2" video:

""I'm not supposed to but I've tasted your shortcake!" The Littlest Edward blurted out (I immediately filed this away for future double entendre use)."
 * This page. The captions. 'Nuff said...
 * The Secret Life of Dolls has lots of jokes about swords. Also:

""I can run off an empty tank all day long,"
 * Rosa Fiametta of Survival of the Fittest loves these.

"It'd be just great for you to help me by coming ... and lawyering.""

"Alex: You know it's all about finding the right key. The one that fits... just right. The one that you insert deep into the back door..."
 * While reviewing David Bowie's crotch... er, Labyrinth, The Nostalgia Chick is repeatedly interrupted by Nella, who offers her "dick", "meat and two veg" and "cock". All perfectly innocent food - the first one's spotted dick (a British dessert) and the last one's chicken.
 * This deviant art stamp. It's very clever.
 * I'd like to dip my fries in your... special sauce.
 * Balls, balls are so much fun! That's why I have two and not just one!
 * "Taco night is when we lay some beef in a pink taco...drip some guacamole...make her sour cream..."
 * A lot of Alex's lines in Awkward, although given how deep in the gutter (and Lester's pants) his mind is, it's hard to say how much is intentional.


 * In Cracked's article on Jennifer Love Hewitt, those are plentiful.
 * On That Guy With the Glasses, Doug Walker, Spoony, Benzaie and Sad Panda all tried... well see for yourself.
 * Also in the Nostalgia Critic's "Nostalgic Commercials", during the "Wet Banana" ad.

Western Animation
"Bloo: *Turns to golf channel* Look, that guy's hitting a little white ball into a hole!"
 * Non-sexual example: when Terra reappears in Teen Titans, her first line is "So... which team am I on?" She's referring to volleyball, but
 * The Ambiguously Gay Duo from Saturday Night Live is based on these, from the episode titles (such as "A Hard One to Swallow" and "First Served, First Come") to the dialog to their car. And the plethora of Sight gags in each episode, lampshaded by "...what's everybody looking at?" "Nothing!"
 * Animaniacs was infamous for this kind of humor, mostly courtesy of Yakko, who would frequently blow a kiss to the audience and go "Goodnight, everybody!" whenever someone else made a Double Entendre.
 * In "Hercule Yakko", Yakko takes the role of detective on board a ship. Instructing his sister Dot to check for prints, she soon returns with the singer Prince in her arms. Yakko clarifies it as "fingerprints", wiggling his fingers. Dot merely glances at Prince, who leers at her, and remarks, "I don't think so."
 * Fosters Home for Imaginary Friends:

"Danny: I couldn't sleep with my arch enemy in the guest room next to me.
 * South Park: For a number of episodes, the main characters got a new teacher whose name was Ms. Choksondik (pronounced "Chokes-on-Dick"). Humorously, none of the otherwise dirty-minded main characters seem to have understood the joke, and have made fun of her by calling her things like "Ms. Choksonrocks" or "Ms. Makes-me-sick".
 * The Movie was also called South Park: Bigger, Longer, and Uncut. If you don't get the entendre there, think about it for a while.
 * The title is also a Shout Out to 15-Minutes-of-Fame John Bobbit's porn movie.
 * What makes this even better is that the original subtitle was "All Hell Breaks Loose", but the "Hell" in that was unacceptable, unlike the final title.
 * Also, Chef's songs and his chocolate salty balls.
 * As long as we're talking about songs from South Park that have double entendres, how about the ones that aren't sung by Chef? Like the "Getting Gay with Kids" song from season three's "Rainforest Schmainforest" episode? Or that song Butters tapped to in season eight's "You Got F'ed in the A"?
 * Rocko's Modern Life was famous for the sheer amount of (very thinly veiled) double entendres it has employed. Some examples include the Show Within a Show "All Scottish Show" (as an acrostic), a fast food restaurant called The Chokey Chicken, a board game the characters play called Spank the Monkey, an eye doctor cupping one of Rocko's eyes in his hand and asking him to "cough, please", a ride operator at a carnival reading a magazine called "Playslug", immigrants from a country called "Ballzakk", a toy for dogs called "the Doggy-Style rides", and a banjo-playing coon saying menacingly "We're gonna make you squeal, piggy!" (He then proceeds to pull a pig from behind his back and tickle it with a feather, making it, in fact, squeal). All this from a show intended for elementary school children.
 * Danny Phantom is known for innocent lines of dialogue that could mean something... else. For example:

Sam: My parents sleep in the bedroom next to me. It's not the same, but I can't sleep, either.

(and)

Sam: You'd scream, too, if you were stuck in a sleepover with [Paulina].

Danny: Actually, I kinda doubt that."

"Sam: (dancing with Danny) Promise me you'll keep your pants up? (Danny's ghost powers had unintentionally made them fall down in front of Paulina)
 * And:

Danny: I'll do my best!"

"Maddie: (trying to remove the bottom half of a deadly battle suit) Vlad, help me get these pants off Jack!
 * Also, watch the episode "Eye for an Eye" and just hear any insults between Vlad and Danny. Their words have a very Subtext feel to it and they say it so frequently it just borders on Foe Yay.
 * Season Three in general is rife with Danny/Vlad Foe Yay and subtext. It's all over the place.
 * Also this:

Vlad: Nope. Sorry. That's all you."

"Van Driessen: ... There's a wonderful world out there when we find we don't need TV to entertain us.
 * Beavis and Butthead have a special talent for finding double entendres in the most innocuous of statements -- even if they have to isolate specific syllables within a word in order to do so, and if the double entendre makes absolutely no sense or has absolutely no relevance to what's going on at all. And yet they sometimes fail to understand plainly spoken or shown sexual references, when that works better.

Butt-Head: Huh huh huh. He said "anus"."

"Butt-Head: If I could turn into a bird, I'd turn into a cock."
 * Van Driessen's song "Touch a Mountain"
 * Also, in one episode, "Wet Behind the Rears", Butt-Head's quote gets past the radar:

"Rattrap: So, where ya been, bird-dog?
 * Adventure Time has one in the episode The Enchiridion, where Princess Bubblegum tells everyone to turn around while she shows Finn her "secret place".
 * There's also an episode featuring a talking heart named Ricardio who, when introduced, was giving Princess Lumpy a "special massage meant only for best friends" and assured everyone that it was "completely consensual".
 * There are plenty more in the series. There's one case where, when trying to distract Jake, he tells him to play "fifteen minutes in heaven" with his girlfriend, and shoves them in a closet. To top it off, there's an episode where Jake is so attractive he's causing animals to rush to him-including snakes. Finn then says "These snakes are everywhere. There's even one in my underwear!" as he holds up a pair of underpants with a snake in them.
 * What about the episode with Billy? When Finn and Jake pull Billy's sword, one exclaims that it's Billy's "legendary crack". What.
 * Technically counts as a triple entendre.
 * In the TV cartoon The Flintstones, Wilma is pregnant, and needs to be taken to the hospital. Her husband Fred's best friend Barney follows along to help Fred get her into the hospital. Barney is, however, too aggressive moving her out of the car, and as a result, spins the revolving door so fast Fred is spun out, and across the street into a hotel. Arriving at the front desk, Fred, quite calmly states the truth, "I'm looking for my wife, she just came in here with my best friend." The clerk, nonplussed, simply says, "Look, we don't want any trouble here", to which Fred responds, "What kind of a hospital is this?" to which the clerk replies, "This is a hotel; the hospital is across the street."
 * What do I need three for?
 * Very useful in Getting Crap Past the Radar, as seen in this example from Transformers: Beast Wars, after Silverbolt has been spending time with Blackarachnia:

Silverbolt: Scout patrol.

Rattrap: Oh, yeah, scouting the enemy. Find any new positions?"

"Ventress: My dear General, there is nothing you have that I could want."
 * Though that double entendre is acknowledged rather than something the writers tried to slip past, as Silverbolt punches Rattrap in response to that remark.
 * Star Wars the Clone Wars: After Grievous mockingly offers Asajj Ventress some battle droids for the escort, she replies to the cyborg in a hyper-sexy voice:

"Slo-Mo: I like a man who does it fast.
 * Also used in Transformers Animated in a conversation between the speedster Nanosec and the time-slowing Slo-Mo as they exchange meaningful looks.

Nanosec: And I like a woman who takes it slow."

"Green Lantern: Don't startle me like that! You know what this ring could do to you?
 * By that same token, on Justice League, Flash's constant bragging about being "the fastest man alive" eventually causes Hawkgirl to quip "Which may explain why you can't get a date."
 * Justice League and Justice League Unlimited were filled with this sort of thing. For example, when Vixen pulls Green Lantern into a closet for a little quality time, he's startled -- and more than a little disapproving of her method:

Vixen: Promises, promises."

"Hawkgirl: I hear she's, you know... (meaningful pause) Brazilian."
 * And again when Flash is eying the South American superheroine Fire.

"Hawkman: You always were good with that thing."
 * There's also the Season 5 episode "Ancient History" where Hawkman and Hawkgirl battle the Shadow Thief. At one point Hawkgirl attacks the Shadow Thief with a whip, and Hawkman, who believes the two are reincarnated lovers, says:

"Linda: Gosh, he's a total babe! Like the entire track team at once! Um..."
 * Then there's the episode where reporter Linda Park (Flash's eventual wife in the comics) attempts to explain to a friend why she finds Flash attractive:

"Amanda Waller: Bruce's DNA was easy enough to obtain: he left it all over town. (Terry reacts with an Eye Take). Not remotely what I meant."
 * Explaining how she established project Batman Beyond:

"Roxy Rocket: I was the best he ever had."
 * In the Batman the Animated Series episode "Cult of the Cat", every other thing Catwoman says has sexual meaning.
 * She's very similar in Batman the Brave And The Bold. Although Batman gets in on it too.
 * Most of whatever Roxy Rocket says is this in both Batman the Animated Series and Superman the Animated Series:

"Harvey: So as we see from this tape your power was...
 * Harvey Birdman Attorney At Law: The entire Apache Chief episode.

Apache Chief: Growing large, at will... especially in the mornings."

"Mentok: Looks like the squirrel's been showing everyone where he keeps his nuts."
 * The scene usually cuts to Judge Mightor waving objects like a golf club or a pool noodle saying "Deedle leedle leedle leedle." whenever a phallic related double entendre is made.
 * Secret Squirrel is convicted of flashing:

"Harvey: Every time this squirrel opened his coat, it was to pull out a critical tool--
 * Harvey's closing arguments for that episode were loaded with them, which Mentok dutifully lampshades.

Mentok: I'll say!"

"Mouse 1: He knows my sister!
 * Ed, Edd n Eddy occasionally dabbles in this. Like in the episode "Run For Your Ed", where Rolf is seen carting away a giant sausage and boasting "Rolf's giant wiener will fetch a pretty penny at the market".
 * The Looney Tunes Speedy Gonzales shorts feature a few of these, when the mice need to get Speedy's help and someone knows how to contact him...

Mouse 2: Speedy Gonzales knows eeeeeeeeverybody's sister..."

"Liz Allen: You can web me up anytime, Petey."
 * The Spectacular Spider Man uses these for Getting Crap Past the Radar. For example, an approving Liz Allen admires Peter Parker and his Halloween costume by saying:

"MJ: You [two] could go down to Times Square, watch the ball drop. (winks)"
 * Everything Black Cat says. I distinctly remember a line about Spider-Man getting his goop in her hair.
 * Possibly unintentional, but MJ says this to Peter and Gwen in the New Year's Eve episode:

"Odd: Hey, speaking of "hot chocolate", I finally got a date with Heidi.
 * One interesting stretch of dialogue in Code Lyoko takes place between Ulrich and Odd as they're getting out of the shower (common bathroom at a boarding school, in case you're wondering), with Odd talking about Heidi, the last girl in his class he hasn't dated:

Ulrich: Eh, you gonna give her your croissant?"

"Brian: So, uh, where's your good buddy James Woods?
 * The writers were playing with the "croissant" jokes throughout the episode, but there was absolutely no way the hidden meaning of the last one was that well hidden.
 * Family Guy will usually do the old joke of a string of double entendres, followed by a plain-spoken line that makes it clearer than it ever had to be they weren't accidents. When they don't do this, the double entendres are borderline single anyway. In one episode, specifically about Peter's (heh heh) jealousy of Chris' enormous... Little Chris, he tries several stereotypical methods of Compensating for Something, most blatantly a red car with an unreasonably long and phallic hood. He then drives at an overpass saying, "Don't worry, baby, I'll be gentle", stops halfway through, reverses, goes forward again, and repeats. Then he's met headlong by another vehicle, making his car as short as a Volkswagen. Then a bus drives by full of beautiful women pointing and giggling.
 * Also:

Peter: Eh, turns out he wasn't so good at catching stuff in his mouth. So where's your girlfriend?

Brian: Same problem.

Brian & Peter: Wooooaahh!!"

"Stewie: Farewell, Brian, I'm off to sea. An hour from now, I'll be surrounded by seamen; sperm whales and seamen. Oooh, a swallow."
 * When Stewie wants to follow Lois on a cruise:

"Quagmire: You know what I'm talking about right? (silence) Oh!"
 * Subverted in one episode when Quagmire actually runs out of innuendo.

"Peter: I am gonna sue that bastard and make him pay out the ass. No ifs, ands or but(t)s. I'm gonna be real anal about this. ........... Sphincter!"
 * Also:

"Peter: Just don't forget our deal, Lois. I sit through this and later tonight I get anal. You hear me? No matter how neat I want the house you have to clean it."
 * And:

"Peter: Well, you datin' that guy? It's just a lot to take in.
 * In the episode "Jerome Is the New Black", when Peter finds out that Lois used to date his new friend, Jerome:

Lois: Oh, you tellin' me!"

""Glenn, you should be very proud of your dad. It was an honor to serve with him. Come on Dan, let's get a drink. So glad to see you back in your element, surrounded by seamen."
 * Later in the episode Peter becomes very insecure, causing Lois to proclaim, "Come on Peter, it was over ten inches ago! I mean years!"
 * Or in "Quagmire's Dad", where Quagmire is stressing about the possibility that his dad might be gay...at a reception held by his fellow navymen in his honor:

"Your dad took supplies where no one else would go! I can't tell you how many loads your dad took when I served with him!"

"Everyone here admires your dad. He'd walk into an army barracks and make every private feel special. He really knew how to stroke those privates."

"Your dad was the cock of the walk, Glenn."

"Every day at rifle training, he'd help me clean my butt!"

"Your dad once drank me under the table!"

"If there was one man you wanted in your hole, it was your dad!"

"Your dad had the best penis in the military!""

""Glenn, you're ruining this ball. You know how much I love balls!""
 * (after Quagmire finally freaks out and runs to his dad)

"Aang: Living underwater?"
 * Avatar: The Last Airbender:
 * "Fruit tart" is regarded as something of a secret code in Mai/Zuko circles, given the contexts in which they're mentioned.
 * When a guard is ordered to protect Mai, she replies with, "I don't need any protection." To which Zuko chuckles and replies, "Believe me, she doesn't." Intentional or not, you will never hear that line the same again.
 * The Drill is about stopping a giant drill from penetrating the wall of Ba Sing Se and releasing soldiers to conquer the city. However, Katara and Toph manage to increase the pressure on the drill from behind, so that some sludge spews out prematurely. Then Aang works the front and causes it to explode.
 * The Fire Nation intends to penetrate the walls of Ba Sing Se (which proudly translates to "inpenetrable city") via use of a mobile drill tank. Aang and Katara weaken the metal column supports inside the drill using waterbending in hopes that the machine would collapse on itself. When this doesn't work, Katara and Toph build up pressure by water/earthbending (respectively) the rock slurry back into the drill. Aang delivers the fatal attack to the drill by earthbending a stone pin, running up the wall of Ba Sing Se, running down the wall at super-speed, and hitting the pin with a powerful blow. The drill then collapses and the slurry system ruptures, resulting in Azula's plans being foiled yet again by "Team Avatar."
 * Along the same lines, in "Nightmares and Daydreams" Aang has a daydream about finally confessing his love to Katara, and when he snaps out of it she asks what he was dreaming about. He replies with:

"Fry: (after escaping from Lrrr) Yes! I never thought I'd escape with my doodle, but I pulled it out!
 * "Love is brightest in the dark."
 * There's this show out there called I Got a Rocket! in which the protagonist, er, got a rocket for his birthday. No, seriously. And it won an Emmy, too. Seriously.
 * Futurama made this into a brilliant running joke for the episode Spanish Fry, all about Fry's lower horn... which is his penis.

Bender: Just like at the movie theater! Wooooo!"

"Marge: You turned Springfield into America's trash hole!
 * The Simpsons has done this many multitudes of times over the years. However, there is one episode in particular that stands out... the episode where a sudden snowfall traps the kids in the school with Principal Skinner has lines like "Ach... that's the last time you'll slap your Willy around" (- Groundskeeper Willie)... "Good work, Nibbles. Now chew through my ball sack" (- Principal Skinner, trapped inside a duffel bag that held dodgeballs)... and a suspicious looking silo full of "salt" that explodes when it hits the ground.

Homer: Marge, Ix-nay on the asshole-tray.""

"Ganon: I want that princess!"
 * The "We Put the Spring in Springfield" song from "Bart After Dark" is a pretty clever one. It's the episode where Bart (and subsequently everyone else in town) finds out about that Burlesque house. So that "spring" could refer to other things...
 * The Fairly Odd Parents has Timmy's Mom saying "He's so affectionate" with a nervous-looking smile when Adam West/Catman hugs her legs. This causes Timmy's dad to become jealously angry.
 * The Legend of Zelda cartoon was remarkably full of Parental Bonus lines, although few of them were presented as double entendres. However, in the episode "A Hitch In the Works", Ganon offers a gem when he orders the abduction of Zelda. Making it even funnier is the fact that he's ordering his mooks to kidnap her so he can force her to marry him:

"Archer: You said no dates!
 * In episode two of Static Shock, Virgil is talking to his doctor, trying to figure out if the Bang Baby gas he breathed in will have any adverse affects aside from his superpowers. He does this while not telling the doctor that he inhaled Bang Baby gas. It sounds like he's talking to the doctor about puberty and being sexually active until Virgil realizes that's what it sounds like.
 * Archer:
 * In "Killing Utne":

Malory: I said no such thing.

Archer: Well, your mouth did!

Malory: Well, your mouth better get over there and make Torvald happy!

Archer: Um, phrasing?

Malory: Regale him with exciting tales of ISIS exploits!"

"June: Henry, you really should try taking your relationship with Dawn to the next level.
 * In Ka Blam:

Henry: *stares at her*

June: I meant talking to her."

"Larry: It's not the size of the equipment. It's how you use it!"
 * Haha! Cody's got a tiny sausage!
 * I'd like to top his honor role!
 * Ow! My wiener!
 * Yeah, you're an expert at turning people off!
 * Larry from Time Squad (a.k.a "Cartoon Network's 26-episode juggernaut of Ho Yay, Freud Was Right, Getting Crap Past the Radar, and Does This Remind You of Anything? Moments") gives one when a robot grouped with Sheila, Buck's ex-wife, shows off his modern thermal sensor which helps them locate Alfred Nobel. Larry clearly lacks such advanced equipment, which makes him deliver the line:

"Larkin: (to Ingrid) Hey, Third! How'd you like that cream pie?"
 * Then there's the beginning of ""Kubla Khan't", where Tuddrussell refers to a "centerfold" of a phaser as a "sweet piece of action."
 * Tudrussel makes it into this trope too with his line in "Horse of Horrors". While reading a magazine "Burgers and You", he exclaims; "Man! Will you look at the size of those buns! Mm-mm!"
 * In Fillmore there's a particularly unsubtle one (that makes one wonder how did it get past the radar) in "Cry the Beloved Mascot":

"Vanessa: Well, Ferb, you sure know how to show a girl a good time.
 * Probably unintentional but in an episode of Rugrats in which Chuckie becomes obsessed with Tommy's Mr. Boppo toy (a clown punching bag) and isn't paying attention to his friends Phil remarks "A kid should be outside playing with his friends not bopping his Boppo all day".
 * Used in many Robot Chicken sketches. Lampshaded here
 * Half of the things on Phineas and Ferb's GCPtR page belong here. For example:

Doofenshmirtz: I had to disable it. It was doing weird things to my head, man."

"Candace: Hmmm... maybe they should call it jump, duck and blow!
 * Complete with a stoner-like accent.

Jeremy: At least you don't have a weenie on your head!

Major Monogram: Carl, don't forget to lift the seat when you're done!

Norm: I'm drilling!

Background Singer: She's gonna be a big sensation, cuz she's sporting major kinkification!

Candace: ...and I am NOT using the banana this time!"

"Doofenshmirtz: Thwart me, Perry the Platypus!"
 * Followed by Phineas saying "Y-you guys heard that, right? I-it wasn't just me?"

"Candace: Oh, yeah, Jeremy. Nobody makes a corn dog like you.
 * With Perry reacting appropriately.

Doofenshmirtz: This is really a two-handed job.

Laird Hamilton: Whoa, you got pounded!

Jeremy: Y'know, Candace, I've had a lot of fun in your backyard, but this is the best time yet.

Candace: Oh, pardon my reach. I'm just getting in the most convenient position to drive this stake into the ground."

"Lydia: I know how we'll fix it...we'll cut it off! (Beetlejuice shrieks in panic; Lydia shakes her head long-suffering)"
 * Jimmy Two-Shoes: When Peep, a salesman, is hitting on Heloise and showing off his merchandise at the same time, she yells "I'm not interested in your junk!"
 * The animated Beetlejuice: In "Mom's Best Friend", Beetlejuice changes into a dog and can't change back because of a restrictive collar around his neck. Sweet, innocent little Lydia delivers this as she takes out a pair of scissors:

""Blue Beetle's deeds are really swing, but who will bring him out of his shell?"
 * Batman the Brave And The Bold features a song called "Birds of Prey" (from episode "The Masks of Matches Malone!") which isn't even subtle. Listen to it here.

"Flash's rogues finish last... Too bad sometimes he's just too fast!"

"Green Arrow has heroic traits, that is, when he's shooting straight"

"Aquaman's always courageous! His little fish, less outrageous..."

"Plastic Man can expand... Becomes putty in our hands!""

"Meatwad: Ooh yeah, baby. That's a neat car she's washing. You think that's a straight six?
 * Grim puts a powerful artifact in his mystic trunk and warns Billy to "Stay out of the junk in me trunk!"
 * The sausage-stuffing challenge of Total Drama World Tour results in one of Noah's most famous lines: "Look. Cody has a tiny sausage."
 * In the Aqua Teen Hunger Force episode "Revenge of the Mooninites", the Mooninites are watching porn stolen from Carl's secret stash, leading to this exchange:

Err: I think I have a 'straight six'.

Ignignokt: Ooh, Err, your sexual innuendo is priceless."