The Cinema Snob/Funny

Cinema Snob

 * Really, anytime he says "What's this?" and "What the fuck?" just makes me laugh. I just love how he delivers those lines.

Troll

 * His reaction to the father being named "Harry Potter," from disbelief to disappointment that this was likely where J.K. Rowling got the idea. "Oh, great. Harry Potter and the Troll Toll of the Boy's Soul."
 * What the hell?! Fucking Professor McGonagal is their fucking landlord?!

Troll 2
"Snob: Holy shit, it's Dracula spelt backwards!"
 * His response to the name of the town being "Nilbog":


 * "You know who else threw parties? GACY!"
 * Pointing out the grandfather ghost's resemblance to Orson Welles, and saying if there's gonna be ghost Orson Welles, he'll stick with The Critic, thank you very much.
 * Then there's the opening. The Snob just stares onward and says, "I have been to the Xibalba and back."

Death Bed the Bed That Eats

 * Playing the Raiders March over the bed "lassoing" its victim.

Ax Em

 * The Snob reenacting the "Worst Line Reading Ever" from Tough Guys Don't Dance.
 * A character gets "zanied to death".

American Commando 3: Savage Temptation

 * "What? Hairy pits? I had to pay extra for that at my bachelor party!"

Superman: The 1975 Musical
"Snob: I am Superman! Ow!"
 * The Snob tries flying off his porch. It doesn't work.

"Music: Nanananananananana
 * Earlier in the film, the gangsters singing along to the theme from The Sopranos.
 * The critic dubs the Adam West Batman theme over a fight scene done in almost the exact same style...with a little alteration:

Snob: [Deadpan] Superman...

Music: Nanananananananana

Snob: [Deadpan] Superman...

Music: Nanananananananana

Snob: [Deadpan] Fucking Superman..."

Black Devil Doll from Hell

 * He says that the film is so unsexy that thinking of Porno Holocaust is giving him an erection. Then, without changing his facial expression, he reaches over and grabs a jug of water, which he then pours on his crotch.

Hell's Bloody Devils
"Col. Sanders: *walks onscreen*
 * The Cameo from the real Colonel Sanders. His reaction might be one of the greatest Big "What?" (The Fuck) moments ever recorded.

Snob: *blink blink blink*

Col. Sanders: *stands there*

Snob: *leans forward, squints*

Col. Sanders: Isn't that the most wonderful chicken you ever ate?

Snob: ... WHAT THE FUCK."

Beaver and Buttface

 * His reactions to the aforementioned duo:
 * "It looks like a pair of escaped child molesters crashed the set of Clutch Cargo!"
 * "I can't have that nightmare swimming around in my head like it's trying to win a gold medal in SYNCHRONIZED BRAIN-FUCKING!!!"
 * At the start, when he has a nightmare of E.T. The Porno, Brad sits up and shouts out "Ich bin der Waffelautomat!"

Super Hornio Bros
"Snob: *humps air to the sound of coins* This! Is How! You Make! A Fucking! Porn! Parody! *stops for a few seconds, then does one last thrust, prompting the one-up sound effect*"
 * ALL the Mario references.

Caligula
"Snob: Trivia note: McDowell actually ad-libbed the bit with the flower, and it's kind of amazing watching the gears work in his head as it hits him to do that to this actor. I think it was right about...here. [Shows a freeze-frame of McDowell grinning] Yep. That's the look of a man who has the bright idea to stick a flower in a guy's ass."
 * The cameos from the other contributors.
 * A sudden instance of Brad Tries.
 * There's also the random cut-in from The Bruno Mattei Show.
 * Lord Kat's long improv in the gag reel is an Overly Long Gag at its finest.
 * The Snob's "comedic breakdown" of the fisting scene.

"Caligula: Gemellus, we are alone. We must love each other.
 * 80's Dan.
 * His tone of voice as he says "Is that a fucking snake?!" during one of the scenes he can't show.
 * "Have you given him more wine? What the... I meant a glass of wine! What in Jupiter's name are you doing to this man?!"
 * This exchange:

Snob: You shall be the first one that I fist."

"Snob: Whoa, no. No. No, no, no. No. (etc.)"
 * Kung Tai Ted's summation of Caligula's death.
 * The Snob freaking out when the first scene shows a herd of sheep.

"Snob: What is this, reverse Sleepaway Camp?"
 * "I'm really glad these two are happy, but I don't know why! Given that this movie was filmed in The Seventies, and that's Malcolm McDowell, I can only assume this sequence is going to end with rape!"
 * "Yes, it's just what I've always wanted; to have balls delivered to my house by a man named Longinus!"
 * "...so don't get mad if I can't show you the hermaphrodite with the penis growing out of her vagina, because apparently, that's how that works!"
 * "What the hell does 'Adapted From An Original Screenplay' supposed to mean?! Adapted from a screenplay that was probably much better than this film?!"
 * After Caligula names his "son" Juila Drusilla:


 * Snob syncing up the launching of the Orgy Boat with "We Sail The Ocean Blue" from HMS Pinafore.
 * "I personally find it funny that the writer of the film left, the director of the film left, and the movie was released to audiences who at this point in the movie mostly left."

Violent Shit
"Snob: It's funny when a movie cuts frames out of the MIDDLE of their scenes, but makes up for it, by forgetting to trim a one second cut out of the end of their scenes!"
 * Him criticizing the film's editing when it comes to cutting between scenes.


 * We then have a very brief shot of a naked Snob sitting in the chair and reading a newspaper before cutting back to the film.

"L: You may not know this, but my father K was a butcher shitter.
 * He sees the top billed name is "K The Butcher Shitter" and asks "Is he the father of L from Death Note"?

Light: Uh, what?"

"Snob: WHY IS THIS HAPPENING?"
 * During the end when Karl the Butcher is giving birth:

"Snob: ... Why?"
 * In the sequel, when the killer cuts off someone's head and the girl screams in the most OTT manner:

"Drunk: "Listen to this one. I just started at the site... and said: 'Excuse me, can I fuck you?' She says to me: 'No sorry, I'm on my period.' So I say: 'Can I at least fuck you in the ass?' And she says 'Sorry, I have hemorrhoids.' So I tell her 'Now don't even tell me you have a toothache!'"
 * This:

Snob:ಠ౧ಠ"

Las Vegas Bloodbath
"Snob: Watch this! [Pulls out his phone] Hey John, do you think you can add a flashbang effect to this movie footage? You can?! That's great! You're sending it over now? Well let's take a look!
 * Snob only gets a minute into the movie before the special effects (or lack thereof) get to him:

[Previous film-scene, with an obvious muzzle-flash edited in]

Snob: Y'see that? In two seconds, I just gave your movie a budget!"


 * Snob: Ahh! Look! There's a drill in my head! Aren't you TOTALLY convinced that there's a drill in my head?
 * After 30 minutes of watching a group of girls a baby shower, play cards and truth or dare, watch themselves on TV, and eat pizza, the killer finally arrives to kill them all with a choir singing Hallelujah in his praise.
 * "I have a list of jokes here to go along with that fetus-removal scene!" *looks at list* "But they are incredibly tasteless and offensive."

Hardgore

 * "Thats funny. I thought the 70's cure for nymphomania was just 'more cocaine' ".
 * "Any minute now I expect her to just break down and fuck the boom mike!"
 * "What the hell am I looking at here? Was that Zardoz's cock?!"

Redneck Zombies
"Snob: Naming your movie Redneck Zombies is sorta like naming your movie Transylvanian Vampires... Or Emo Vampires... Or Gay Vampires... [beat] STOP MAKING FUCKING VAMPIRE MOVIES."

Creepozoids
"The Chick: You don't think this setup's weird?
 * A group of people are investigating an empty building in an explicitly post-apocalyptic setting.

Male Character: I just think they left in a hurry, that's all.

Snob: I know. Something must have scared 'em away, like possibly THE NUCLEAR HOLOCAUST!!!"

"Character: You figure out what this place is?
 * When two characters are looking on a computer to find history:

Snob I know what type of place this is! IT'S A BUILDING!"

Satan's School for Girls

 * "He was a dissolve cut all along! [camera pans down] ... and he pooped."
 * The "Ball Buster" commercial.

Chatterbox
""Virginia": Hey, you see the way she looked at me?
 * It's a movie about a woman with a talking vagina.

Snob: Oh, so now it's also got EYES? THIS IS TERRIFYING!!"

"Snob: At least it's better than The Vagina Monologues. [smiles] And that's the first joke I wrote for this review!"

"Director: Yeah, I want people to know that this is more than the first movie starring a real cunt.[...]This is a...social document.
 * During the production of a movie starring "Virginia":

Snob: Yeah, and A Serbian Film is a political commentary, you putz!"

"Snob: So you see? The moral of the story is if you have a great title, your movie will get made. No matter how fucking awful the finished product is. [cheerful] Well this really bodes well for my unsold screenplay, Card Shark! "When the casino gets flooded, everyone has a full house. Of sharks.""

Sadomania
"Snob:: A sadistic woman warden played by the stunning, Transsexual, adult film star Ajita Wilson.
 * The Snob becomes so distracted by the stunning beauty of the female prison warden, puts the review on hold to find out more about the actress.

[Double Take]

Snob: What. Transsexual Adult Film Star?

[Dramatic close up]

Snob: Oh. My. God.

[Cut to Shower of Angst]

Snob: (On the phone with his girlfriend) Honey. Honey. Honey. We need to have sex. Right. Now. I am really, really, really confused..."

Pussy Talk
"Snob: Is that the soundtrack or some annoying kids on a fucking plane?!"
 * Another talking vagina movie!
 * In the intro the normal theme song is replaced with Michigan J. Frog singing "Hello Mah Baby!"
 * In the same review, when the main female lead is escaping whilst in the background music plays with a "Hup! Hup! Hup!" sound in the background:

"Snob: Why do I have the feeling someone is now going to fuck a horse in this movie?"
 * The Big Box Model, erm... accompanied by the voice of Kung Tai Ted, to her horror.
 * At the start, when he sees the logo of the company who makes the film


 * "Since this is the dub version, this means YOU'RE the English!"

Zombi 7 (AKA Zombie 90: Extreme Pestilence)
"Snob: When you take a look at this doctor, wouldn't you think "voice like a Southern black man"?!"
 * At one point, the Snob theorizes that the only reason this movie has the alternate title Zombi 7 on IMDB was because a fan of his added it in the hopes that he would review it and that months later he will be reviewing "Night of the Seagulls AKA Zombi 8". Sure enough, if you go to IMDB...
 * His reaction to one of the dub voices.

"Snob: Hmm. Nice to see what Handsome Tom and 8-Bit Mickey were up to during the early nineties."
 * His nicknames for the main doctor, including "Doctor L. Jackson" and "Doctor I Speak Jive".
 * His comment on the main characters dubbed voices.

"Snob: Now this movie only serves as a warmup to Uwe Boll's Blubberella!"
 * His comment on the fat woman dubbed with a male voice.

"Snob: You can't say Special Forces with that kind of dubbing, because then I'm gonna expect Pierre Kirby and General Karpov to show up! And when they don't, I'm going to be pretty fucking disappointed!"
 * "Were these dub actors on loan from the Godfrey Ho studios?! This doctor is like listening to Chris Rock dub Brent Hume! And the other guy sounds like fucking Clint Howard!"
 * The Snob's reaction to "Special Forces?"

"Tall Doctor: Alright. Lets... Lets... Lets go now... Lets separate... now.
 * His take on how the film would play like subtitled.

Short Doctor: Oww!! Look at dis! Ewwwwwww!!!"

Silent Night Deadly Night 2
"Snob: Christmas Day!
 * Realizing the meme has been for every holiday except one...


 * Tries to shoot Jerrid, but hits someone across the street*"

Italian Batman

 * Italian Batman doesn't have any subtitles, so the Snob decides to add in his own subtitles... taken from the Batman movies.
 * The Snob confirms that the actor playing Batman was also in Porno Holocaust. How can he tell? By the genital warts.
 * "We all certainly remember the classic Danny Elfman Batman theme! Yeah, this isn't it!" (Cue the movie's So Bad It's Good Synth soundtrack.)

Video Violence
"Snob: This movie... fucking SUCKS!!! *Throws the box to the floor, where a shattering noise is heard*"
 * The start of his review.

Video Violence 2
"Snob: Interesting... I forgot the DVD I had was the limited "Glass Case" edition."
 * The above moment was given a callback at the start of his review of the sequel.


 * The time-travelling Call Back joke between Current!Snob and Past!Snob.

Riki-Oh: The Story of Ricky
"Snob (imitating Freeman): I wish I could tell you that Zorro fought the good fight and that Ricky let him be. I wish I could tell you that, but prison is no Miyazaki fairy tale world."
 * The "Morgan Freeman narration"

Star Odyssey
"Snob: "Bastard! They destroyed the world's supply of Stock Footage! Now how is Nick Phillips going to make another Death Nurse movie!""
 * When the aliens destroy a bunch of cities on Earth, using some very old stock explosions (as in "the movie is in color but the stock footage is in black and white" old).

"... (concerned) I'm sure that will work itself out..."
 * Being interrupted by the final shootout of The Hooker With a Heart of Gold.

"The man from the fridge might have claimed that he is the Waffle Maker, but this guy, really IS the Waffle Maker!"
 * Commenting on the villain, who is a scaly looking person.


 * "Enderium... the mineral is called Enderium... That make you happy, James Cameron? YOU RIPPED OFF STAR ODYSSEY!!
 * "After endearing the Unobtainium... I mean, obtaining the Enderium..."

Billy the Kid vs. Dracula

 * After noticing that Billy the Kid vs. Dracula is the sixth movie starring John Carradine he's reviewed, he changes the the opening credits of the show to "The John Carradine Show starring The Cinema Snob". The theme song? Night Train to Mundo Fine, of course!

Jesse James Meets Frankenstein's Daughter
"Snob: Why did I even do this [Public Domain Month], anyway?! *cough* DVD *cough*"
 * His not-so-subtle reasoning for public domain month.

"Snob: Don't feel bad for Hank though: he's left with one of the greatest tombstones ever!

Tombstone: HANK TRACY. HE WAS JESSE JAMES' FRIEND.

Snob: I hope to God that when I die, my tombstone reads something like "Here Lies The Cinema Snob. He once reviewed Troll 4 with Phelous"!"

The Refrigerator
"Can you blame the fridge? I'd go nuts too if I had to witness that grotesque display of leap-frog."
 * After the fridge claims his first victim after a squicky love scene:

Death Nurse 2
""Why haven't more movies done that? Why didn't Halloween just divide itself in half and then draw out it's segments by inserting footage from Scream Blacula Scream? Oh wait, I know why, it's because John Carpenter isn't fucking retarded!"


 * His reaction to hearing that the star, Priscilla Alden, acted in a porno movie.

The Body Shop
"Wait, I'm sorry, is this movie supposed to be the fucking origin story of The Powerpuff Girls? I forgot that Professor Utonium used sugar, spice, everything nice and fucking severed body parts!"

Grizzly 2
"Snob: Chatterbox. Finished. Superman: the 1975 Musical. Finished. Las Vegas Fucking Bloodbath! Finished! Grizzly 2? Yeah... we're not gonna bother finishing that."
 * The Snob explaining why the prospect of reviewing of the movie scares him.

"Unnamed Character: I just got something over the radio...Destroyed campsite...two dead bodies, kids. *Musical stinger as the scene changes*
 * A gem from his review of this in complete film.

Snob: Hrm, sorry. It's just not the same if the music cue ISN'T Michael Jackson!

Unnamed Character: Destroyed campsite...two dead bodies, kids. *The opening bars to Thriller is played over the stinger*

Snob: *Grinning awkwardly* ...Perfect?"

"Snob: THIS ISN'T FUNNY!!!"
 * "I recognise those lyrics, it's from every Emo Live Journal entry I've ever read!"
 * Parodying an Overly Long Gag in the vein of Family Guy by trying to pick up a box on his porch only to have it repeatedly fall from his grip. He eventually grabs it and throws it over the balcony.


 * "I'll stick with good 1980s George Clooney movies like..." *long silence*

Nudist Colony of the Dead

 * The songs from Nudist Colony of the Dead are catchy enough to make him dance naked on his front porch.

Geek Maggot Bingo
"Frankenberry: YOUUUUUU FUCKING WIENER HEAD!!
 * The entire review of this Mind Screw of a movie (Which surprisingly has no maggots, or no bingo) is full of gems:
 * Commenting on Professor Frankenberry sounding more and more like Professor Farnsworth from Futurama near the end of the film, culminating with:

Snob: Can't say I've ever heard Farnsworth say that!"

"Snob: You realize it would have been cheaper, just to throw a DUMMY off the cliff!"
 * He later calls Frankenberry Doctor Forrester, an arguably more apt comparison given the guy's appearence.
 * A characters death from falling played out via an animated falling sequence

"Snob: The Rawhide Kid has a bit of luck, because the monster is randomly struck by lightning! I guess because he walked longer as Mr. Hyde than he did as Dr. Jekyll!"
 * Also a brilliant Shout-Out to the The Angry Video Game Nerd at the end, when the monster gets struck by lightning

"Snob: Maybe the title even goes on from there! "The Freak From Suckweasel Mountain, And Love The Bomb Who Went Up a Hill But Came Down a Mountain, While Drinking Your Juice in the Hood!""
 * And that's the end of Geek Maggot Bingo! *laughs a little* What the hell?! Where do I start? Where do I finish? What the FUCK do I even need to say about this?!
 * "Are you happy, movie? Your BADNESS killed your actor!"
 * His comment on the full title for the movie - Geek Maggot Bingo, or The Freak From Suckweasel Mountain.

"Tagline: ...what?"
 * Hell, even the tagline is hilarious


 * "Wanna be in my movie, Mountain Biscuit Corpse?"
 * "Fortunately for him, he found the world's only man with a transvestite hunchback fetish."
 * The "most pretentious last words ever" sequence is hilarious. The Snob is disappointed, as he wanted to use the speech for his last words.

Alice in Wonderland: An X-Rated Musical Fantasy
"Snob: When you know what E.T's asshole looks like and what the word "Conchadunga" means...yeah...it could be a LOT worse."
 * The ending to this review, where he states that the movie could have been a lot worse...which he acknowledges that it isn't much of a compliment coming from him:

"Alice: That's my breast. When I have a child, it will fill with milk to feed it.

Snob: (fake laughs) You see that? (Points down at his crotch) Erection, GONE!"

Las Tortugas Mutantes Pinjas
"Snob: For those of you who are curious the full title for the film is Las Tortugas Mutantes Pinjas, which I think stands for [shot of naked torso] EEEEEWWW!!!!"

"Snob: Oh, sure! Sure! This is what I want to see. TURTLES FUCKING! Well, why don't you just pop in a Mondo Cane film? I'm sure that's got turtles fucking!"
 * Also, the opening of the review.

"Snob: Oh, so Raphael's a voyeur now? Well that's going to cost him about ten wall flips. I can't show you what he's looking at, there's no subtitles so I don't know what she's saying, but judging by the sound of her voice... (Audio clip of woman moaning in ecstasy) Mikey, I think she likes it.... in the ass!"

"Snob: Fin question mark? Well of course this isn't the end, in the sequel they learn about the "Secret of The Ooze"! Here's a hint...[stage whisper] It's jism!"

Night of Horror

 * At the beginning, the Snob realizes that he's about to watch another movie about zombie Confederates. He interrupts his own Theme Song to yell "FUCK!"
 * Also, playing Creedence Clearwater Revival's Fortunate Son over Civil War reenactment footage.
 * From the Curse of the Cannibal Confederates, it starts with Brad holding his head in his hands, showing off his new wedding ring, and he says "I made a huge fucking mistake!" Looking down at the ring, he says, "Oh, no, not that, I mean watching Curse of the Cannibal Confederates.

Dracula: The Dirty Old Man

 * Jerrid dubbing over the Snob at the end while parodying said movie's Narmful dubbing (overly describing the Snob's actions and making him sound like a Jewish sterotype)
 * Really, anytime he says "What's this?" and "What the fuck?" just makes me laugh. I just love how he delivers those lines.

Pieces
"Kung Tai Ted: That's for shooting me in the kneecap last year! **walks off**
 * After seeing a track-suit-wearing Asian man jump out of nowhere and assault a woman before explaining that he ate some "bad chop-suey" and running off, the Snob asks if it "could be more out of nowhere." Seconds later he is repeatedly punched in the face by Kung Tai Ted:

Cinema Snob: Owwwwwwwwww!

Obscurus Lupa: Ha!"

A Clockwork Orgy
"Snob: Oh yeah, Gene Kelly's second-most popular song! Let me guess, they're going to replace Beethoven with "On Top of Spaghetti"!"
 * "But why am I saying this? This isn't a review of A Clockwork Orange! As if there needed to be another review. It's a classic. Watch it! And if you haven't seen it...then you're probably five years old. And if you're five years old...WATCH CLOCKWORK ORANGE! IT'S SO AWESOME!"
 * The Snob's reaction to the orgy scene in where they replace "Singin' In The Rain" with "Take Me Out To The Ballgame":


 * "Okay, now I think you're confusing a Clockwork Orange spoof with a Caligula spoof."
 * The Snob dubbing over the mainstream pornos during the treatment scene with clips from E.T. The Porno, Beaver And Buttface and Super Hornio Bros.
 * "Is it really such a problem in this futuristic society that citizens roam around having consensual sex with each other? This future's so bright I've got to wear Trojans!"
 * "...The hell? Did she fuck him so hard it put him in a wheelchair? Eh, worth it."
 * After making an Incredibly Lame Pun about the characters being "a street gang I could get behind... or in front of", Brad looks off camera to make sure that Jillian isn't around.

The Tormentors
He realizes that the phone number on the Nazi business card is an actual phone number. He decides to call the number, only to be greeted by a loud clip of Adolf Hitler giving a speech, causing him to drop his phone in surprise. "Yeah, you're about as Southern as Dan Whitney."
 * His reaction to Dear Leader's accent:

Nightdreams
"Snob: ...this scene reminds me of something.
 * "Huh, the director's cut of Sucker Punch really is that different." And after that, struggling not to make Sucker Punch references... and eventually failing.
 * During one scene where the female lead finds and plays with a fetus:

"NEWBORN! PORN! NEWBORN!"

Snob: Ha ha, no, that movie was directed by pedophiles! This one is just weird."

Night Trap: The Movie
"Snob: Brazillian Wizard of Oz? TURKISH Wizard of Oz? Oh, a classic, Strip to Kill, and... the HELL? The Charles "Tex" Watson 1990 Parole Hearing?!
 * The bootlegs the Snob DOES get in the mail

Beat

What the hell am I gonna do with THAT?"

Caligula II
"See this? Tegretol. I'm epileptic, I have been since fourth grade. Turkish Star Wars is the first movie I've done on this show that is literally TRYING TO KILL ME."
 * The Snob begins his review of Caligula II, a sequel to a movie where the title character died at the end, by staring incredulously at the DVD case for several seconds, before finally just saying "...what?" Cut immediately to the Snob's theme music.
 * In his review of Turkish Star Wars, regarding the constant flash cuts:


 * Also, playing the theme to Cannibal Holocaust over one of the action scenes.

Pink Flamingos
"Snob: What? This isn't shit, it's a candy bar. That was shit. Grow up."
 * The Cinema Snob celebrates what looks like the end of the movie with "my usual post-review Caramello"... and then, in the film's most famous scene, Divine eats the dog turd. He stares at the film with a slack jaw... and then eats the Caramello.


 * When Edie repeatedly demands to see the eggman, the Snob goes "Goo goo g'joob."
 * "If this movie had any less of a point, it'd be a sphere!"
 * The Cannibal Holocaust theme makes another appearance, this time over Babs' trailer burning down.

Hitler: Dead or Alive

 * The actor playing Hitler does a surprisingly good job, leading the Snob to look up the actor on IMDB, curious as to the actor's place of origin. He discovers that the actor, Bobby Watson, is from Springfield, Illinois... the Snob's (and Brad's) place of residence. "That's... that's where I'm from!"
 * The Snob's own version of Douchey McNitpick shouting "Lloyd!" prompting Lloyd to appear behind the Snob.

Child Bride
"Given that this a 1930s picture, I'm sure it's got some inappropriate music for the opening titles. *cheerful 1930s music plays* Classy. Nothing says "anti-pedophilia" like hijinks music."

"Preacher: If there is anyone here among you who knows of any reason why these two should not be joined together in holy wedlock, let him speak now --
 * Snob: WORST LITTLE RASCALS EPISODE EVER!

Snob: She's twelve!!!!"

""Well I have no standards. I'll do it.""
 * From the same episode: "That's a laugh that says, 'I think you're funny, but I also wanna wear your skin.'"
 * At the beginning of the video before the music intro, he explains how the crew of MST3K refused the film he says.


 * "There, just chuck the body down the cliff. That way it will look like the ground stabbed him."
 * The Soundtrack Dissonance from Nekromantik's most infamous scene causes the Snob to imagine more fitting images for the music (seagulls flying and gathering on beaches), only to have the village-burning scene from Cannibal Holocaust appear out of nowhere.

Cannibal Holocaust
"Bolla: This tapwater tastes like cola...
 * Jerrid as Detective Bolla:

Mrs. Snob: Yeah, he only has Crystal Pepsi flowing through our pipes...

Bolla: Well that's stupefyingly nostalgic."

"Bolla: First!
 * Jerrid taking a jab at video commentors:

Mrs. Snob: What?

Bolla: I'm the first person to comment on this video!"

The Sinful Dwarf
""And there you have the first onscreen appearance by the My Buddy doll.""
 * After a scene where they use a stunt dummy for Olaf's suicide via window jump:

Maniac
""Is that little shit giving me the finger? Well, right back at you, Baby Bob!""


 * Also, Jillian being visited by The Messiah from The Tormentors, who reads from "the book of Paul". ("When I find myself in times of trouble, mother Mary comes to me...")

Bat Pussy

 * He reviews Bat Pussy while wearing a horse head.
 * Just the way he says "Holy shit, The Anal Dwarf!" after sitting through the main movie.
 * "That's it? Really!? This is the closest I've come to just simply snobbing two people fucking for an hour!"
 * "Ralphus is very well hung, by the way. This is one horse that's impressed!"

Badi (The Turkish E.T.)
"Snob: Why, yes, the movie does make me want to have phone sex! How did you know?"
 * Cinema Snob riffs not just on Badi, but on the TV pop-ups that were recorded along with it.

"Snob:I am NOT your fucking son!"
 * "Wait, was that commercial about to turn into porn?"
 * "Good thing they're flying away now, as the town looks like it's been hit by extreme radiation!"
 * The very end, where the word "SON" appears on screen (It's Turkish for END, btw.)

Nukie
"Snob:...you can't convince me that George Lucas didn't write this movie!"
 * The entirety of it, but here's some specific examples.
 * His reaction to a particularly bad scene.

"Snob: WHO'S HARVEY!?"
 * His reaction to a character bringing up a previously unmentioned "Harvey" is just so goddamn earnest, it's amazing.


 * Snob: Never thought I'd be so glad to be back in the deserts of Africa. Will something hilarious happen, please? (one of the children is struck by a cobra) HA!
 * The failed attempt to bring "Matt" to come and say his phrase. It's followed by the Snob trying to sound enthusiastic saying "Symbolism!".
 * After complaining the whole movie why Nukie just doesn't fly to America, this happens at the end:
 * Nukie: I have an idea! If we can't walk, we can fly together!
 * Snob: (dripping with hate) You don't FUCKING say!
 * Snob: Good thing I reviewed this movie on hump day, because I feel like I just got  fucked! 

Homoti (The Other Turkish E.T.)

 * Upon seeing a random animation scene of Homoti: "They're trying to make the credits for Casino Royale!" Cue "You Know My Name" over the CG.
 * Ed Glaser's attempt at giving the history of the film. "It was directed by... Turk Turkman"
 * Snob's numerous jokes about Homoti's huge ass.

Extra Terrestrial Visitors
"Snob: "We've come to the end of E.T. Week. *chuckles briefly* Thank fucking GOD!!! At this point I really don't fucking care. I've seen enough Turkish aliens, double-penied E.T.s, and NUKIE to make me wanna blast off to my own planet where no human's interpretations of extra terrestrials can ever hurt me again!""
 * His realization that Extra Terrestrial Visitors is just another title for
 * The Snob's recap of E.T. Week.


 * "Welcome to 2011! Where the word "Centipede" takes on a whole new set of connotations..."

Blood Rage
"Snob: "Did I just watch the original Let's Play?""
 * His review for Blood Rage, made funnier by that his voice keeps cracking throughout the review.
 * On a clip of two of the characters playing a computer game

"Snob: The only difference between these two movies is that in Blood Rage, I don't get to see Body By Jake acting like a fucking nutbar!"
 * He does a brief comparison between this film and Home Sweet Home, which he reviewed a year previous.

"Snob: Hey! He just did you a favor - he stopped you from drinking a whole thing of Old Style!"
 * Upon a character having their hand chopped off

"Snob: Hmm...not as gorgeous as my luscious breasts!"
 * And when a female character is shown in the shower...


 * He proceeds to display a screenshot from his website, which has recently updated the icon for the Cinema Snob series. It's an illustrated 3/4 profile of the Snob...but it's perfectly situated above an image of the Big Box Model's rack, giving it the appearance that he is sporting double-D cups. This troper had noticed the coincidence before the video, but the fact that he acknowledged it made it even better.

Corpse Grinders

 * At the start, Lloyd is seen sitting in the Snob's chair. As the camera zooms in, Lloyd perks up and meows, causing the Snob to back off.
 * Then The Reveal that Lloyd had a role in the movie. (Doing pretty good for a 40-year-old cat! Heh.)

Elves

 * The title card where the Snob is hiding behind his chair from the title monster.
 * *Awkward Pause* "Psh, whatever... I have friends. This movie isn't speaking to me in a weird way..."
 * "Merry Christmas, the Nazis win!"
 * His amusement when Dan Haggerty's character points out the ridiculousness of the occult section being in aisle 666.
 * "I'll stick with Ernest Saves Christmas."

Cannibal Ferox
"Snob: Apparently, they caught him before he could put on his Orgazmo costume."
 * Calling the main villain and his friend Trey Parker & Matt Stone. Extra funny since the villain really does look like Trey Parker.

"Snob: Well that was a delicious fifty-cent joke!"
 * Bubble Tape!

"Snob: I'M NOT IN THE FUCKING MOOD!"
 * The Snob noting the overuse of the word "twat". By the third time he's reduced to nervous giggles.
 * After hearing the villain call one of the women a "hot-pussied little whore", he goes to see if that line really works.
 * The cameo from Detective Bolla from the Cannibal Holocaust review.

Anthropophagus
"Fan: Dear Cinema Snob; I'm writing to express my concern about telling your audience to call their girlfriends a "Hot-pussied little whore." I tried it out on my girlfriend, to which she promptly stuck a broom up my ass, and forced me to sweep the kitchen floor.
 * The return of the snotty letter-writing fan:

Snob: Oh well there's your problem; you gotta pay them before you call them a "hot-pussied little whore"!

Fan: P.S. Giovanni Lombardo Radice is awesome!

Snob: That he is, my friend. After all, he was in Gangs of New York, and that was a Martin Scorsese film."

"Subtitle: 'Bugger!'"
 * "This movie even comes with subtitles! Proper subtitles, rather; so I can't add in my smart-ass fake ones. Pah!"

"Snob: "He looks like if Gallagher turned into one of his watermelons, and then smashed himself!""
 * "Okay gentlemen, you can finish filming your Sacha Baron Cohen film later. This movie has places to go, and fast!"
 * Fresh Campbell's Coca-Cola soup!
 * "Oh I fucking knew it! I knew the soundtrack was written by a cat on a piano!"
 * [later] "Maybe if the producer would stop playing his Colecovision, something could get done!"
 * Snob meets the 'Anthropophagus':

"Snob: "Enh, sorry... all out of Bubble-Tape.""
 * "Joe D'Amato! The Ed Gein of filmmakers!"
 * In response to the killer's death:


 * "I just ate a fucking fetus!"

Zombie 6: Monster Hunter

 * "What the hell? When did this movie's dick get so small it looks like it just came out of the swimming pool?"

Guyana: Cult of the Damned
"Snob: Is it time to get sleazy again? Ho, ho! I can already smell the dick sweat."
 * The entirety of the skit about some (tortured) kids from the cult meeting up as adults.
 * Brad's delivery of this line makes it hilarious:

"Snob: I hope his ass likes classic television, 'cause that guy's gonna MASH it!""
 * The scene where two male cult members are ordered to have sex.


 * There's also the most perfectly timed Kentucky Fried Movie gag of all time.

The Helter-Skelter Murders
"Snob: Seriously?! Do they have to play in my backyard?"
 * Snob actually manages to make Charles Manson (the actual Charles Manson) seem funny by splicing in courtroom footage at random points throughout the review.
 * The return of The Tormentors's Messiah, reading from "The Book of Mungo Jerry"

Rape Squad
"Jillian: This doesn't look like John Travolta (Creator) and Lily Tomlin about to have sex...
 * Jillian: The last time I trusted a hockey player, I got a miniature Zamboni shoved up my ass.
 * Snob:You know, there's probably an easier way to pick Kane Hodder out of a lineup.
 * The beginning discussion of Moment By Moment

Snob: Well thank God for that, but seriously: the fuck?"


 * Jillian: It's Valentine's Day, how did a movie called Rape Squad get a higher priority? Snob: Have you seen my show for the last five years? We're lucky they didn't send an actual rape squad.
 * Cinema Snob shares the male pain.

Terror Of Tiny Town
""What the Hell was that? I thought I was the shortest person with a sexy voice.""
 * All his complaints about them using a regular sized set.
 * After seeing a minor character sing in a rather deep voice:


 * "I may not know the characters' names, but judging by what they're riding on, they look like they're at least Bronies!"
 * Funnier in that his wife Jillian is a Pegasister (the Distaff Counterpart to Bronies); she wears a Pinkie Pie shirt during an episode of Brad Tries.
 * The Snob replacing the music playing during the fist fight between The Hero and The Villain with music from the Rudy Larriva-directed Road Runner cartoons.

The Last House On the Left

 * His increasingly irritated reactions to the jumbling of tones in the movie, particularly the shenanigans the two cops keep getting into.
 * "The next time someone gives me bad news, I'm going to react with madcap comedy!" Then Jillian walks into the room and tells him that her great-grandma died. The Snob's response? Dance on his front porch completely naked while the goofy kazoo music from the film plays.

Guinea Pig - The Devil's Experiment

 * The Snob calls in a cop to take a look at the film. At first you think he's reenacting how Charlie Sheen mistook one of the Guinea Pig films for a legitimate Snuff Film... then you find out.

Gums

 * This porno spoof of Jaws provides plenty of jokes.
 * Porno spoof Quint is a Nazi!
 * A bizarre scene with Hooper talking to... a dog. The Snob even compares it to Nukie.

Mother's Day (2010)

 * Snob's fanboying of Rebecca De Mornay and how he believes its a remake of that movie instead of Mother's Day.

Sleepaway Camp
"Artie: Back where I come from, we called 'em "Baldies."
 * He's in full Snob mode in this review, dripping with sarcasm when it comes to his opinion on films like this. "Nightmare On Elm Street and Black Christmas? Totally the same movie."
 * "Muppet Babies I can understand, but Jersey Shore Babies? Something bad needs to happen to them so we can set things right in the future!"
 * On the mother's acting: "Joan Crawford's tampon doesn't overact this much!"
 * The pedophile's introduction.

Snob: "Baldies?" They've got plenty of hair on top...I mean, maybe not down - oh, fuck me, he's a diddler."


 * His overall commenting on how homoerotic the movie is.
 * "That stare...at least it will haunt ET's fucking vagina out of my nightmares."
 * "...that's a dick."

They Saved Hitler's Brain
"Snob: *blink blink* What the fuck?
 * Snob reacts to a bizarre silhouette:

[The silhouette turns out to be two Nazi officers]

Snob: Y'know, it's a movie called 'They Saved Hitler's Brain'; it wasn't so preposterous of me to think that was a three-armed, three-legged Nazi!"

"Day: You killed my son!
 * Steve Day:

Snob: You Klingon bastard!"

"Snob: "Horseshit! Everyone knows that Hitler was killed when he was shot 100 times in the face by Eli Roth. And what is with these severed heads never giving a shit whenever they're set on fire? Completely unrealistic!""
 * The chase scenes being set to music from The Blues Brothers.
 * After Hitler's head is taken out:

Brad Tries
"Brad: It's chunky! Oh, I did not see that coming! It's fucking chunky and clumpy!"
 * Brad Tries Birds Nest, in which he tries a drink that was given to him by a couple that were too afraid to try it themselves. The funniest part about it is that after trying it again, he likes it!

"Brad: In case you forgot it's Canadian, it has the word "Canadian" on it, and pictures of hockey players... a maple leaf... picture of Phelous on the side -- wait, what?!"
 * From Brad Tries Beaver:

"Brad: Pizza beer: if it doesn't get you drunk in twenty minutes, it's free!"
 * "Brad Tries Pizza Beer".

"Rob: *downs a glass of something that has left Brad and Doug half-senseless and hysterical* That's not that bad chugged! [beat] *Drops his glass on the floor without changing his expression*
 * Half an hour of Brad, Doug and Rob trying things and being disgusted and hilarious. Watch for yourself.

Doug: It hit you, didn't it?

Rob: *choking* It's fine!"

"Jillian: *downs it without any reaction* You guys are pussies."
 * Culminating with Jillian giving it a try at the end:

"Brian: No, kitty, don't eat that, it's terrible."
 * From Brad Tries Dick Stick.

"Brad: *Takes sip* Oh... fuck me. Yeah, it tastes like V8 if someone fucked all the vegetables first."
 * From Brad Tries Moxie, his reaction to Malta Hatuey.

"Brad: No kitty, that would make this video all kinds of illegal."
 * In "Brad Tries Sperm" Brad's cat sniffs at the bottle.

"It's not what you think! I can explain!"
 * The tagline for the video also qualifies:

"Brad: Welcome to the spinoff series-cause why not? Flaming Brian's Kitchen! [starts laughing]
 * The premiere of Flaming Brian's Kitchen has Brad and Brian try out Buffalo Wild Wings hottest sauce. Hilarity Ensues.

Brian: Is that seriously the only reason you're doing this? You don't even give a damn about hot sauce!

Brad: Ha!"

"Brad: Well it's better than calling it Kristallnacht."
 * Brad's joy of finding a drink that looks and tastes exactly like Crystal Pepsi only dampened by the fact it's called Not See Cola

"Brad: This thing is smushing my face. The taste is giving me unwanted plastic surgery on my face....I don't like this."
 * Not to mention his claim that the soda is an apology for World War II.
 * And revealing that he owns an early-90's Crystal Pepsi delivery driver's jacket.
 * From Brad Tries Coca Cola Blak, after a third try of Manhattan Special Espresso Coffee Soda:

"Brad and Phelous are lying next to each other in the bed.
 * In Brad and Phelan Try Grass Jelly, Brad and Phelous spend several minutes searching for something to review - from paintings to irons to mp3 players, as well as Phelous's stick figure drawing of Film Brain from their crossover review of Lockjaw. And then this happens:

Brad: That was just awkward."

"Brad: From what I understand, this is a fairly old drink, like this has been around since the 50s. Maybe not this particular bottle, but...whatever, I'd still drink it."
 * Also, ", WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU?"
 * In Brad Tries the Mc10:35, when analyzing the Trocadero.


 * Brad Tries Billy Beer. No, seriously, Brad Tries Billy Beer. It goes down about as well as one can expect a rusty, 30-year-old can of shitty beer can...
 * Drunk Max Force Tries Cookie Dough Vodka. For some reason he's wearing a penguin suit. You really can't top that.

Brad and Jerrid
"Brad: I am not fucking your belly button.
 * Brad and Jerrid watch The Room.
 * All of the sections where Brad and Jerrid act out scenes from The Room and even more so, the bit where they slip into a reenactment of The Happening.
 * From the same video:

Jerrid: C'mon, dude, we've got to reenact this scene!

Brad: I am not fucking your belly button!

Jerrid: I got the tub of butter right here, it'll go in real easy!"

"Brad: Who created this movie anyway?
 * And also, Jerrid saying "Hi, doggy" to a cat.
 * This exchange:

Jerrid: I don't know *both stare at the camera* I can't remember his name."

"Brad: Do you even know what a fortnight is?
 * This exchange from "Brad and Jerrid Play Warcraft":

Jerrid: Yeah, it's like a baker's dozen but with time."

": Oh ha ha fucking ha!"
 * Brad and Jerrid Hate Each Other. Full stop.
 * Especially the end:

Crossovers
"Lupa: Wanna review a movie with me?
 * Pretty much the entirety of his crossover with Film Brain.
 * At the end of a cross over vid with Obscurus Lupa, he responds to her question of whether he would want to watch another movie with her by punching her in the face. The post credits gag is a second take of that scene where he accidentally fails to pull his punch and genuinely hits Lupa in the face; he spends about 30 seconds apologizing for it while Lupa comments that he "hits really hard". Could double as a crowning moment of heartwarming since it's scenes like that that really show how much of an extended family the TGWTG team really is to each other.
 * The Snob keeps getting confused during Lupa's "slow motion dramatic music zoom-in" running gag. The second time she does it, during the zoom, you can see him give her a bewildered look.
 * Also, this exchange at the beginning:

Snob: NO!

Lupa: Too late! I already put it in!

Snob: FUCK!"

"Linkara: Ever think the characters on our shows are kinda weird?
 * The Bimboes B.C. review with Linkara involves 90s Kid and 80s Dan meeting and deciding to trade Coke 2 for New Coke, the Ninja-Style Dancer engaging Kung Tai Ted in a dance battle, Harvey Finevoice and Vic agreeing to sing a Tony Bennett song, and ends with this exchange:

Snob: Yes."

"Linkara: "Space Lancer Steve?"
 * After the video 'ends', The Snob has literally made up a character for the expressed purpose of creating a crossover counterpart to Linkara's . Complete with quite possibly the crappiest costume the Snob has ever thrown together:

Snob: "What're you looking at me for? He was your fucking idea...""

"Insano: Ugh... why do people always want to hit me? Aaaah!(Gets hit by a comic thrown by the Snob)
 * Also, after the character "Doc" in the film mentions how scientists exploited the common people during a nuclear war, Doctor Insano appears to gloat... until Linkara and Snob drive him off by throwing comics at him.

Snob: I feel power that I've never felt before..."

""When two insurance company employees are invited to their boss's beach house for the weekend, the two are in for quite a surprise when they find their boss dead, and must keep his body a secret from the rest of the party goers.""
 * The Snob posted Part 1 of Suburban Knights on his website - but with the following plot synopsis:

"Part 2: A tough cop is given his most difficult assignment: masquerade as a a kindergarten teacher in order to find a drug dealer.
 * And it continues with the other parts.

Part 3: When a boy wishes to be big at a magic wish machine, he wakes up the next morning and finds himself in an adult body overnight.

Part 4: A large Halloween mask-making company has plans to kill millions of American children with something sinister hidden in Halloween masks.

Part 5: A mentally unstable Vietnam vet begins a one man war against a small town police force.

Part 6: A slightly disturbed and painfully shy young girl is sent away to summer camp with her cousin. Not long after their arrival, things start to go horribly wrong as campers turn up murdered in grisly fashions.

Part 7: A socially awkward health club employee falls into a barrel of toxic waste at the hands of psychopathic bullies, then grows super human strength to become the Avenger his small town has been praying for."


 * In his and Phelous' commentary, Brad suggests making the next anniversary a murder mystery, but laments that everyone would automatically assume that he was the killer given how he's cast as such in a lot of his projects.
 * Some of his contributions to Pushing Up Roses's It Came From the Desert LP are gold.
 * During the cameo-laded Moulin Rouge review by The Nostalgia Critic, Brad's contribution is... a three second cameo calling out "What the hell?" when the Critic says that Brad's film Paranoia is a Guilty Pleasure.
 * In his commentary for the episode, Doug Walker said that it was one of his favorite moments.
 * In Tromeo and Juliet, Oancitizen making up more Shakespeare Parallel Porn Titles. With the Snob saying one exists.
 * "Wild guess: I believe she's afraid of men".
 * Oan failing to recognize a room full of Troma Shout Outs, and the Death Glare the Snob gives him.
 * Snob's stunned disbelief that the movie actually foreshadowed the effects of Juliet's potion via subtle motif.
 * Oan pointing out the Fridge Logic in the Snob knowing so much about Troma movies despite being, well, a snob. He shushes him.
 * After the final plot twist, Oan gets a Snob-like Better By a Different Name moment by saying the film would have worked better as a production of Tis Pity She's a Whore. And then both realize that the idea has potential.

Current Movie Reviews
"Jake: I don't know, I hated damn near everything I saw this summer. My absolute worst, I'm gonna say the group of friends that I have, for making me see all of that shit."
 * Brad reviews "Guys Gone Wild: Spring Break Young and Hung" - "...Wow. That's the biggest penis I've seen since... I don't know. What movie did I do on the Cinema Snob last week?"
 * "You have naked guys. You have a teddy bear. Make them fuck the bear! At least that would be hilarious!" (gets a very thoughtful expression) "But probably not for the bear..."
 * As part of his Vlog series on midnight screenings of films, Brad sent his friends Jake and Boyd to watch The Smurfs. Their review consisted of a tremendously hilarious Freak-Out.
 * When "Rise Of The Planet Of The Apes" is brought up, Jake makes a hilarious point: "SHOOT THE FUCKING MONKEYS!!!"
 * Brad sends the two out again in December to see Alvin and the Chipmunks 3: Chipwrecked. The resulting Freak-Out is quite possibly even funnier than The Smurfs.
 * David Cronenberg's Crash of the Planet of the Apes.
 * Brad sends Jerrid and Jillian to see The Change Up. To say Jillian looked like she wanted to kill Jerrid would be an understatement.
 * The entire "ass-burgers" discussion from the review of Glee 3D.
 * Jake's rage across Brad's Midnight Screening reviews was always entertaining, and he stole the show in the wrap-up show, where Brad and his friends discussed their favorite and least movies from the summer.

"Brad (as Al Pacino): Hey Bobby! I bet I can make a worse movie than Little Fockers!!"
 * In Brad and Jake's review of Spy Kids 4 for his Midnight Screenings vlog, after mentioning the preview for Adam Sandler's Jack and Jill, Brad mentions how he thinks Al Pacino decided to take a part in the movie:

""You know how this is supposed to be a review of penguins and now it's a review of fucking?""
 * In the Midnight Screenings entry for Mr. Popper's Penguins, Jake relates his accidentally spotting a completely naked couple having sex in the back row of their theater throughout the entire movie, with the woman's moans occasionally syncing up with penguin squawks. And Jerrid missed the whole thing. The discussion of this takes up half the video, and it's worth every second.

""I am so glad I paid money so you could watch some fucking porn! I had to watch Green Lantern! You had much better fucking 3D than I did!""
 * When Jake was asked if the woman was hot, without missing a beat, he immediately replied "No, no". His deadpan delivery of that one line is priceless.
 * Brad (who went to see Green Lantern) had this to say:

""It's like getting mad at Superman because he flies. What?! Real people can't do that! Psh, look, all I'm saying is that Superman should not be super. He should get shot like the rest of us. Fucking Superman, who the fuck does he think he is?""
 * Reb Brown as Hal Jordan...just let the idea simmer.
 * Jillian reviews Breaking Dawn Part 1 while Brad & Brian have some fun. It truly starts when  and gets better.
 * It is also a Crowning Moment of Awesome for Jillian. Seriously, she has to be a good sport to allow herself to be messy and humiliated like that.
 * Not to mention getting her payback by.
 * The review of the third Alvin and the Chipmunks film, pure rage all the way through. Starting with the opening scene featuring the chipmunks winding their way through people's legs going onto the cruise ship, and they were hoping someone would step on them.
 * Brad and Jerrid sit through The Devil Inside, which has a disclaimer saying it is not endorsed by the Vatican, and Jerrid imagines the Pope sitting in a movie theatre with a bucket of popcorn, endorsing the movie.
 * Jerrid questions Selene's ability to survive a headshot which Brad accepts as it is not a commonly accepted method of killing vampires. Which leads to the following lines:

"Brad: Well, that was hot. Caligula's my favorite movie, think I'm gonna have a problem with incest in Star Wars?"
 * Brad, Jillian, Max Force, and Ryan see The Phantom Menace. When the topic of the Luke and Leia kiss from Empire Strikes Back is briefly raised, Brad has a response:

"Brad: I've seen some bad movies this fucking summer: Priest, Pirates 4. This makes those movies look like Super 8. This movie sucks big, floppy, venereal-diseased, fucking DICK! Oh my fucking GOD, is this a piece of shit! Now I know what it was like, Jerrid, when you went to go see Judy Moody, because this movie is for someone who's fucking FIVE! (beat) But what did you guys think?"
 * Also, he admits right befor the film started, he sent a text to Jake, lamenting the fact he had to see a bad movie.
 * Heck, anytime Brad decides to Troll Jillian, Max Force and Ryan; starting with "This movie is so Wizard you guys!"
 * Brad: The toys will return, and in greater numbers!
 * Brad's theory that Episode I was a bet George Lucas made that he could humiliate Liam Neeson.
 * The first thing he says in his review of Clown Hunt is how much the movie made him feel dumb after seeing it. The review feels like how the Cinema Snob would act if he were an actual person instead of a character.
 * When he's thinking of things that are better to do than watch this movie, one example is a sad clown coming to visit you in The Sims, and you trying to cheer it up. He proceeds to speak Simlish while petting an imaginary clown. Dammit, Brad! I was eating soup when you did that! You owe me a new computer!
 * During the review of The Raven, Lloyd appears to be chilling out on the back of the couch. Then, about halfway through the review, he walks in on the table and looks right into the camera--the cat on the couch was Chloe, Brad's other Siamese cat (and apparent stunt double).
 * The Twitter answers explaining Fridge Logic how the footage for Apollo18 got back to Earth. Some of them include "A Wizard Did It", The Transformers brought it back, and Kyle Kallgren's answer, "Apollo 19, duh!".
 * This piece of gold from the Midnight Screening of Transformers 3.

"Brad: (doing an impression of Bores) When I was a kid, Battleship was a timeless classic. We had battleships, submarines, life boats, sailing boats. Face it, Battleship is ruined!"
 * The increasingly Oh Crap face on Jerrid's face as he realises just how pissed Brad really is.
 * During the review of Battleship, Brad notes that the dumb character looks exactly like Chris Bores. Leading to this.

"Brad: My final thought is, uh... (chuckles) I don't know if I'll see anything worse this summer. Not saying there won't be worse, but whatever is worse... Jake and Irving will probably be at.
 * This exchange near the end:

Irving: (across the parking lot) Fuck you!"

Eighties Dan
"Travis:Today, was a good day."
 * 80's Dan: MCDLT
 * "Why do you hate me lord, is it because I was built by man and not your steady hands?"
 * Dan happening to have a tape about the MCDLT
 * ROB hitting on Mrs.Crabtree throughout the episode.
 * Everyones reactions to Dan's MCDLT, in additon to Dan being completely unphased by it being covered with green moldy gunk.
 * Dolly: "I"m Pretty sure this is how Invasion of the Body Snatchers started."
 * Dolly: "Dan I've seen Creepshow, this dosen't end well for you."
 * Travis: "I'm, pretty sure I saw one of those puss bubbles winking at me, I'm not sure how I feel about it"
 * The Opening with Dan scaring the crap out of his freind and ROB's joy about him messing himself on the floor "It was worth it"
 * Dan shruging off ROB telling him that while he came along because he can save him, he won't and just want's the irony to sink in.
 * After Dan throws up the MCDLT:

"Dolly:Does this mean he had sex with that street light?
 * The laugh track going on during ROB's incredibly morbid statments about the McDonald's Transformers.
 * 80's Dan: Automan
 * The Constant lampshade hanging about the various parts of the show that it has in common with 80's Dan( Having an out of place nonhuman sidekick, not explaining how Dan got where he was, slowly introducing charicters... etc.)
 * "Is it too late to name you 80's douchebag?"
 * "You remember my lecture on Manimal?" "Yeah, because you started masturbating in the middle of it."
 * What makes it even funnier is Brad's own obessesion with Manimal.
 * "How could you sell out like this Cursor? I saw you do Shakespeare."
 * "Rape is what happens."
 * "Not if your Automan."
 * "I can turn Gyros and Stack Circles. Screw you Dan. Screw you." (Laugh Track)
 * Dan constantly acting like Dolly knows nothing about the 80's
 * Rob interrupting Automan with Phantasm
 * Dan attempting to kiss Dolly... only to get a punch in the face.
 * "He dosen't need to scream, he's got Automan."
 * "I sincelry believe that his dreamy good looks killed that man."
 * This exchange after a street light with a lady's voice let's Automan pass:

Dan: That streetlight had a womans voice, that clearly means it has a vagina."

"ROB: What are you doing with my sex box?
 * "I'm not intrested in your gang bang video's Travis"
 * 80's Dan: World Games
 * The Opening with ROB confident that his letter will be one of many Mrs.Cratree get's, thus keeping her husband from getting suspicous.... only for Dan of all people to point out she dosen't act and that his peeping dosen't count.
 * "Theres only one time to get excited about the Olympics... while watching Cool Runnings."
 * After ROB sees them playing the NES

Dolly: Dammit ROB is that why it smells like battery acid?

Dan: It's okay Dolly. Belive it or not ROB's sex juice is the only thing that can get it started on the first try.

ROB: Her name is Nessie... and can we quietly change the subject?""

"Travis: I don't like the way that robot looks at you. I think he has X-Ray Vision.
 * "Techincally I'm 47."
 * "You Actually expect one of those add-on's to work?", "You and me, pistols. Tommorow. At noon."
 * "As long as all the athletes are white, that can't possibly be racist"
 * "The first 80's cokehead joke of this new series is brought to you by the MCDLT"
 * Any time Dan slaps his knee and laughs way too loug.
 * "Can I ski now?", "Sure let's watch you die."
 * "You need some classic 80's ski music"
 * Dan and Dolly doing nothing until they notice the commecial is over.
 * "I used to hang out in alot of bathhouses in the seventies. I'm kind of afriad of large men in diapers."
 * 80's Dan: Hot To Trot
 * During Travis griping about Dan and R.O.B.

(cut to R.O.B.)

R.O.B.: I can also hear upstairs."

"Travis: That figures
 * After Danny Elfman is revealed to be behind the score:

Dan: And just what do you have against Onigo Boingo?

Travis:Nothing I guess, they were good in Back to School

Dan:That's what I thought"

"Dolly: "Most of the time he was on screen I kept wondering if he forgot to take a dump before they started rolling""
 * Dolly on Bobcat Goldwaits voice:

"Travis:See Dan? Your reaction there? That's why you like Hot To Trot."
 * After R.O.B. takes a dump... which comes out as a battery, Dan goes into a fit of knee-slapping laughter:

"R.O.B. I still have nightmares about what he did to Polly Pocket"
 * The discussion of the villan's teeth
 * "The only reason I'm embarrassed is because I'm around people who don't' like Hot To Trot"
 * ROB's story about a man stuffing thousands of Micro Machines up his ass... and then using ROB's gyros to clean it out it in a sepia toned flashback.

"R.O.B.: I'm not sure weather Don should win the medal of freedom for saving the president from a buffalo stampede or die in a mine shaft explosion."
 * R.O.B.: "Why did he have to sneak a horse around in the first place? He was rich and it was The 80's. It was his god given right to own a horse.
 * R.O.B's indecison on the ending of his fan-script for Hot To Trot 2: Stable Condition

"Dan:No one watched trailers in the 80's! We were too busy getting handy j's from the girl peddling Jolt Cola in the lobby.
 * And his reason for writing it: He wants to occupy his time doing something no one else could conceivably be doing.
 * "Your thinking too hard about it, they just wanted Burgess Meridith as a fly."
 * The Reveal that
 * "I'd stick petrified dog turds in my eyes just to make you feel uncomfortable"
 * In the 80s Dan review of Halloween III Season of the Witch, the gang is visited by the Ghostbusters of Chicago, who proceed to rob them blind. While ecstatic Dan does nothing have fangasms over meeting the "real" ghostbusters saying lines from Ghostbusters II.
 * Dolly lamenting why Dan hasn't complemented her costume. Prompting Dan to say that it's  The Death Glare Dolly gives Dan is simply priceless.
 * Also, Dan, referring to him as "that pretentious guy from that Internet show."
 * " That's the worst Dirk Bennedict costume I've ever seen."
 * Dan's constant grumbling about the film... for the sole reason of not having Micheal Meyers.
 * Dan finally warming up to the film at the end...
 * Dan's justifacation for why he didin't watch the Halloween III trailer pointing out it was a sepreate universe from the previous films:

Travis: If by "we" you mean you. I don't think everyone had the same experinces in the 80's as you did.

Dan:Look in the glassy stares in your parents eyes next time you see them. Trust me we all snorted from the same mirrors."

"Dan: Huh, Vampire's Kiss. I'm going to have to call my contact and get us 20 more kilos of the fun stuff.
 * After learning what film their watching next:

R.O.B.: It's me you idiot, i'm your contact!"


 * Dan's disapointment at the fairly quiet night the gang's having instead of the wild drugs and sex parties he had in the 80's:

Kung Tai Ted
"Kung Tai Ted: That's all the time we have on the show today. This is Kung Tai Ted saying... I think I watched a snuff film. (Beat) Figured the Cinema Snob would be the first person that would happen to..."
 * At the end of the review of Tiger Love:

"This one's called the Tex Avery Wolf. *mimes panting like a dog*"
 * From his review of The Return of Street Fighter:

DVD-R Hell
"Winnie-the-Pooh: You're right Piglet. People you see everyday might want to... touch you.
 * Too Smart For Strangers: The opening gag with Bootleg Bill the DVD Pirate. Also his reaction to a molestation lesson by Disney characters:

Brad: *laughs* Yeah, and... wait, what."

"Brad: But unfortunately, Pooh learned nothing about eavesdropping!"
 * Which is followed by a song on the subject matter, prompting bewildered reaction shots from Brad, Jillian, one of his cats, Mr. Bill, and a R.O.B.
 * Brad labelling Tigger as an 'unhinged, coke-head tiger'.
 * "I certainly learned a lot from Tigger and Roo!"

"Man: Hey kid, come here a second. I seem to have lost my dog somewhere around here and I was wondering if you might help me try to find him?
 * During a stranger danger example:

Boy: No, sorry, I can't do that. [rides away on his bike]

Brad: Or you could tell him that you haven't seen his dog and then run away, you rude, ginger, little shit!"

"Brad: Thank you, magic rabbit who dresses like Jack the Ripper!"

"Brad: Haha, so obviously not only is a piglet costume okay, but a tiger costume as well. I hope you pervs are taking notes!"
 * The scene where Owl lets Tigger in:

"Brad: Thanks, guy in a bear suit whose name is another word for feces!"
 * Followed by...

"Brad: Again, very true. My love for Tears for Fears did stem from my mother's love of Patch and Kayla. Then again, I loved Patch and Kayla too... Hey, Days of Our Lives was awesome in the Eighties! That's when it had Nick the Pimp!"
 * "There are some people who might want to...hurt bears" Cue obligatory clip of Christopher Walken crushing a model of "Country Bear Hall" with a sixteen-ton weight.
 * His DVD-R Hell review of Heil Honey I'm Home. "If you're trying to get me to like Hitler...it's not working."
 * Brad's horrified looks during the review's entirety seal the deal.
 * From his DVD-R Hell review of Poochinski:
 * "You know, H.R. Pufnstuff's dick would be less terrifying than this dog."
 * He plays the "Can't shoot a kid, can you, fucker?" bit from Robo Cop 2 when it turns out Poochinski can, in fact, threaten a kid who pulls a knife on him with his gun. So Poochinski is a tougher cop than Robocop?!
 * At the end of the Rock: It's Your Decision review, Brad declares that the main character likely committed suicide ten years after the film. He gives a cheesy smile... and with perfect timing, Lloyd jumps on his couch.
 * The youth pastor claims Jeff could use the same scripture against soap operas that his mother uses against rock:

"Brad: The Captain and Tennille is a sin now too? Calling The Captain and Tennille a sin is a sin against the word sin."
 * When Jeff called The Captain and Tennille (of all things) a bad influence:

"Professor: You can fall in love with a part of a person!
 * From How Can I Tell If I'm Really in Love?

Brad: [In a sinister tone] I love your scalp!"

"Professor: You can't have a conversation with an ass!
 * Shortly afterward...

Brad: Really? I have conversations with Jerrod all the time!

Jerrod: Dude!"

"Brad: Oh, yeah? [Calls off-screen] Hey, honey.
 * Especially ironic considering what we now know about the guy.
 * Later, the professor claims that you don't fight as much when you're in a "mature relationship".

Jill: Fuck you, prick!

Brad: [Grins]"

"Brad: "Whattaya say, kids? Isn't Bibleman cooooool?""
 * In Be Somebody Or Be Somebody's Fool, Brad points out that a sketch ends just at the point he wanted to see - Mr. T, in short shorts and gold chains, sucking another man's toes in an elementary school classroom.
 * He also wants to see more of the Mighty Midgets from Mr. T's Romeo and Juliet story, since it's better than lawn gnomes doing the story.
 * "Thanks, Uwe Boll!" It's only a matter of time before that sound clip gets misused by someone else.
 * From Bibleman:
 * His constant pointing out of the kid-unfriendly scenes in The Bible (incest, sword fighting, decapitation, etc.).
 * "Don't get too mad at these kids, though. They had to fill in at the last minute for Norman Greenbaum."
 * "I tried walking on water, it doesn't work, no matter how much weight I've lost.
 * Kid sings about how he goes to the bible for politics
 * "Ugh, Thought that kid looked familar, nice to know what Rick Santorum was doing in his youth."
 * In a flashback, Bibleman fights a cackling, goggles-wearing mad scientist named "Doctor Decepto". At the end of the video, cue the Doctor Insano cameo.
 * This troper loved Brad's delivery of this line.

Movies in 5 Seconds

 * His "Apollo 18 in Five Seconds" video. (Possible spoilers)

V Logs

 * Brad's road trip vlog. Fellow Channel Awesome member Angry Joe has caused Brad to have a craving for Chick-Fil-A. Unfortunately, there are no Chick-Fil-As nearby, so Brad and his friends go on an epic quest to find one, facing obstacles at every turn. It's Better Than It Sounds.

Other

 * In early 2012, a Blip commercial for a TV show called "It's a Brad Brad World" started playing before videos. Brad Jones noted on Twitter that if he had a show called that, it wouldn't be on Bravo.
 * Similarly, Spoony saw a commercial for "Brad Brad World" before watching The Cinema Snob's review of Cannibal Ferox, calling it Brad-ception