The Computer Shall Taunt You



Imagine you're playing a video game. You're not really emotionally invested in it, you just want to beat the game and...HEY! Did that NPC just insult you?! What a DICK! Now Its Personal, and you will not rest until you not only shut this bastard's mouth, but sever his lips and mount them on your wall!!! (Hopefully the game will let you do that.)

NPCs might taunt, mock, or insult you for a variety of reasons. One reason could be to make a villain seem less likeable to you and more like somebody you just want to punch. Or, if you are playing as a villain, you might go after the good guys with renewed zeal if they piss you off enough by showing their contempt for you. (I mean sure, maybe your character is a megalomaniac with an Evil Plan to enslave half of humanity and seal the other half in People Jars to prepare them for your later consumption...but geez, that's no excuse for them to hurt your feelings!) Or maybe you're playing a Fighting Game where everybody just gets gloaty after winning.

Can be related to Player Punch, depending on the circumstances. Made more frustrating if the computer is also a cheating bastard. Compare with I Shall Taunt You.

"Listen to the sound of your own extinction!
 * Starcraft: Brood War shows you a propaganda film made by the United Earth Directorate which claims that the UED forces have been decimating the pitiful Zerg in a Curb Stomp Battle. Then it hands you control of the Zerg.
 * In a cutscene preceding one mission in Warcraft III where you are controlling the undead Scourge, the orc leading a charge against you opines that killing a bunch of weak, mindless undead like you guys should be no problem. Also, the Scourge higher-ups just LOOOOVE trolling Arthas in the Human Alliance campaign. Especially frickin' MAL'GANIS, who is possibly the most annoying thing in the game...yeah. Stratholme can fast become much less a race to save the people from a fate worse than death than it is a race to make that damn Dreadlord shut the hell up already.
 * Playing the Chris Jericho storyline in Smackdown vs. Raw 2011, you have to wrestle one match with Triple H sitting in on commentary and contemptuously dismissing you as a joke throughout the whole thing. This provides incentive to go after him later on. (Although, since this is Triple H we're talking about, some players may not have needed any additional incentive.)
 * The computer players in Super Smash Bros Melee and Brawl often use the 'taunt' move (there is an actual taunt move for each character) right after they've killed you. It can really motivate a person to kick their ass. Though to be fair the computer probably isn't doing it to be a dick, but to get special points by earning 'Instant Poser', a particular designation you can get if you taunt right after killing someone enough times.
 * More infuriatingly, they will often taunt REGARDLESS of if they were the ones who actually KO'd you or not.
 * Even worse, in Melee, they'll taunt you AFTER YOU KILL THEM AND THEY RESPAWN.
 * In the original, if you did this in Single Player, you'd get the bonus "Fighter's Stance"
 * In Ready, Aim, Tomatoes, if your shooting accuracy was below 50% in a given level, the game would tell you "Good shooting... NOT!!!"
 * In Command and Conquer Tiberian Sun, rogue AI CABAL loves to taunt the player, regardless of affiliation.

(Evil Laugh) Inferior tactics detected!

By the way, missile launch detected."

"Francis: "Yeah, you better hide! Sweatshirt wearin' little wuss.""
 * The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion basically starts you out in a cell. You start the plot by walking up to the gate and listen to the guy in the opposite cell insult you for more than a minute, before finally advancing the plot.
 * Mass Effect 2: Harbinger will not shut up when in combat with you. He even taunts your party members specifically, and assures you it's not done when you kill his current host.
 * Team Fortress 2''s Bots may randomly taunt at human players they have just killed, regardless of the conditions.
 * This can be prevented by typing "tf_bot_taunt_victim_chance 0" in the console (now that it's no longer a cheat as of the Uber Update).
 * AI controlled Tanks in Left 4 Dead will pound the ground and wave its big arms in the air if all survivors are downed or killed.
 * And if you're playing as Hunter in Versus mode, Francis will tell you this:

"Heh, quite the sword you have here. But so long as you continue to telegraph your attacks like the novice you are, you'll never land a blow."
 * The other world leaders in the Civilization series are.
 * In V, certain civilizations are staggeringly petty and insult you frequently with no intention of going to war. The player can either brush it off, or somberly reply that "you will pay for this in time." This might be to allow role-playing players to pursue a war strategy without feeling guilty.
 * In most battles against Dr. Eggman in the Sonic the Hedgehog 2d games, anytime he manages to hit Sonic and his friends, he looks at the player and laughs.
 * After finishing Super Monaco GP for the Sega Genesis once and continuing it with the best car, a Ayrton Senna lookalike named G. Ceara shows up to tell you that "Your days are gone!!!". Indeed, the instant the race starts he'll leave the player in the dust and he's almost invincible.
 * The dog in Duck Hunt pops up and laughs at you if you miss both ducks in any round, and in the "game over" screen (see the page pic).
 * Deadlock took it to a new level, allowing players to send fully voiced, 3D animated boasts/insults/complaints unique to your race at opponents. Some of these approached CMOF level.
 * Avoid the Noid. Every time you die, the screen fades to a picture of a giggling noid, complete with sound effect of annoying laughter. Also, to complete the game you need to search certain phones. Pick up the wrong phone (indicated by a subtle audio cue) will show a picture of a giggling noid on the other side of the phone call. Cue annoying sound effect, then he presses a detonator and your phone explodes. You die, see above for what happens next.
 * Some of the enemies in the first Mega Man X game will laugh at you if they hit you; namely the pickaxe-throwing robots and the lumberjack robots.
 * In The Legend of Zelda Skyward Sword, there is Lord Ghirahim who can steal your sword if you are just flailing the sword around. Upon taking it he taunts the player for their poor skills.


 * Sinistar thinks you're a coward and wants you to know it. RUN, COWARD!
 * Blazing Star has mocking comments like "Hey poor player" appear on the screen whenever you die. And if you fail to beat a boss in the time limit, you get to see "You fail it! Your skill is not good enough, see you next time!"
 * A lot of enemies in the original trilogy of the Spyro game laugh and mock you after hitting you, which for some of them can give you an opening to attack..
 * Playing as a Bounty Hunter in Star Warsthe Old Republic, you get an assignment to kill a Sith. When you get to her, she says she's disappointed that it was just some bounty hunter who was sent after her, not even a Mandalorian! If you ask her why, she says that obviously she's going to make short work of you, since she's this badass Sith and you're just some chump who can't even use the Force. Maybe another Sith could beat her, or possibly a really lucky Jedi, but not the likes of you.