Axis Powers Hetalia/WMG/Allies Characters

WMG regarding America, England, Russia, France, and China

America gets his Friend to All Living Things trait from Native America.
Native Americans are usually shown to be more connected with nature and usually have a Non-Human Sidekick. This carried over to Colonial America. So even though he might do things that harm the environment, animals still flock to him.
 * Played with in one piece of fanart that showed America's and Canada's potential mother.
 * Only that Alfred isn't descended from Native Americans any more than Canada is, the two come from the European colonists who settled in North America. There is a Native American-Tan, and chances are he lives on a reservation right now while America has run of the rest of the country. Eskimo-Tan, Inuit-Tan, etc., would be in their respective states/provinces/territories, they wouldn't be either Canada or America.
 * Alternately, Canada and America could have originated from the Norsemen who first made their way to the North American continent in the 11th century. Could help explain why little America looked a lot like Finland.
 * Norsemen are still European...
 * Perhaps the nations of the Americas are descended from Native America(s?), but have been raised so long by the Europeans that they've been assimilated? I don't know about America, but In Canada, we have a decent-sized population of Native groups that have adopted French and English culture.
 * Wouldn't it make more sense that those native groups are represented by the Native-Tan?
 * Perhaps America and Canada were born to a Native America, and then were stolen from her when they were still young, and their white skin, blonde hair and blue eyes were omens that they would be raised by Europeans. They were too young to remember her when they were taken away, and England (or whoever was taking care of them at the time) raised them to believe that she's just a crazy savage who used to live there, and is of no relation to them.
 * Native America wasn't just one nation. Multiple tribe-tans would make a lot more sense.

That rabbit that America was playing with as a kid? His Spirit Guide.
It totally makes sense! The Native American rabbit spirit, known as Manabohzo (among other names) was a devious trickster with shape-shifting abilities... and one of his forms was Glooskap, Hero God of Nature and Ecology. He was a hero type who enjoyed helping all living things, and took the protection of nature very seriously. When the Europeans showed up and started mucking about with the harmony he had worked hard for, he got pissed off and ditched the little Nation-tan he was looking after. However, his influence is still felt on America to this day, in both his heroism and his love for all living things. (Would that make this a counter-theory to the entry above this?)

America is an ancestor of Indiana Jones
Indy and his father's line descends from one of Alfred's early "adventures" in courtship. It explains the otherwise daring, brash and headstrong attitude of the explorer. It probably also helped in letting Indy into government secrets in the events leading up to Crystal Skull, and shows how he can survive a ride in a nuclear fridge. (C'mon, you know the scene)

England was in a mode of Unstoppable Rage as well as One-Man Army in the last scene of The American Revolution.
He didn't seem to have any soldiers with him, so he was fighting on his own. America had Super Strength, but England knocked his gun right out of his hands.
 * It's hard to know where to correct this one first. The English were one of the most powerful military units at the time, and the American victory (miraculous as it was) had more to do with the benefits of guerrilla warfare than with Super Strength. By the point the scene took place, the interest in continuing to fight to hold the colonies had waned. The English had pulled most of their forces, and a large number of loyalists had fled the country, so the fighting would have been with small numbers on the English side anyway. That doesn't mean that the English were any less of a fighting force, or that England was weaker than America, just that the motivation to continue the aggression was all but gone.
 * You might be misunderstanding a bit. In that particular scene England is shown by himself, without any soldiers. America however, had at least 20 guys standing behind him, guns all pointed at England. America has been shown being able to swing a wildabeast around by the tail at 4 at the oldest. England knocks the gun out of his hands like it's nothing.
 * It's not a misunderstanding. England's lack of men represented a lack of interest by the British people in holding the colony, not the strength of the colonists (it was a war won by luck and coincidence, more than anything). Had the British come at full force, they could have slaughtered the colonists.
 * We're talking about the characters in the scene, not the context about the real world that it's representing.

The American Revolution psychologically broke England to the point that he refuses to go through the strain of another war with his colonies ever again.
England spoiled America rotten, only to be rewarded with America's "betrayal." The strain of trying to persuade America to return to him and then failing and having to deal with the fact that his former ward is now a grown country in his own right thoroughly broke him. As a result, England has given his former colonies freedom more peacefully than any other former imperialist power. As soon as they prove that they can be mature nations willing to solve things in a non-violent way, he will stop trying to persuade them to stay because he cannot and will not suffer through the strain of a revolution again. He was too deeply traumatized by his history with his former favorite "brother," America.
 * Except that England didn't give up most of his territories until he was forced to by treaties surrounding the World Wars, and in cultures like India he was oppressive from beginning to end. The reason the American Revolution happened was because a peaceful solution simply couldn't be reached (despite both party's attempts), and the reason it ended was because England didn't have the time, money, or interest to continue trying to hold the colony when he had issues like fighting France on the European front. It wasn't that he mentally broke, nor is it unlikely that he would have gone to war with another territory if the same situation had occurred.
 * Well, he managed to be involved in a three-year guerrilla War of Independence with Ireland after WW 1, and Ireland was part of the British Empire for much longer than America, so he can't have been that broken. Mind you, he refused to admit it was a war...
 * Isn't Ireland one of England's actual brothers? They've apparently never gotten along at all, since the brothers would drive England off with rocks and arrows when he was a child (and sent [send?] curses in the mail). If anything, the Irish War of Independence would be a brotherly spat that escalated to that point. England raised America and was betrayed. I think the feel of the two different wars would be completely different if Ireland and the other brothers get portrayed in the future.
 * But England was still colonising after America. Although there's the fact that Australia was colonised to replace America (direct quote from the Other Wiki "Following the loss of the American Colonies after the American War of Independence 1775-1783, Great Britain needed to find alternative land for a new British colony. Australia was chosen for settlement, and colonisation began in 1788." ) so take from that what you will. Regardless, there were also other colonies like Antigua and Barbuda, Bangladesh, Jamaica, and others that have tried to revolt against England as well, except he cracked down on his other colonies to stop any revolutions breaking out. Also, I believe it was just before 1960 but he also had a war with Cyprus when Cyprus had wanted to go back to living with Greece, and England only backed out of that war because Greece and Turkey FINALLY agreed (on something) that they didn't want England having Cyprus. I know this isn't the same as the relation between England and America, but certainly it does show he didn't just back down after that one war. In my opinion, England probably only hardened after the Revolutionary War with America, because he hadn't wanted another nation to get that close to him and hurt him again once they betrayed him. Yes, he did let his other colonies have Independence gradually and peacefully, but only after he tried everything else to oppress the smaller ones until he had no option but to give it to them or go to war (and no one wanted that after the World Wars). There were also many other factors involved, which you'd have to look up when the first British Dominions came about to actually understand these factors.

Similarly, China is avoiding Korea to avoid the heartbreak Japan gave him.
Think about it. Korea is as close, if not closer, to China as Japan once was, but China seems to shun him all the time. Even though it's plainly obvious Korea's being annoying out of affection. Think about it - if being close to Japan nearly killed him, China obviously wouldn't want to go near Korea...
 * The Chinese and Koreans don't like each other, but they've become significantly closer allies because of their hatred of Japan. China tends to side with Korea, if given the option.

England represents only Britain, but stands in for the rest of the UK at world meetings.
As in, Wales, Scotland and Ireland (or Northern Ireland, depending on the time period) all exist as their own people who are constantly heckling England, but they never get to show up at world meetings. Which is weird when it comes to Ireland in modern times because it is it's own country now.
 * Ireland probably has his or her own spot at the world meetings now. North Ireland is likely a child embroiled in a custody battle.
 * ...you meant it the other way around, no? Britain = the UK. Great Britain: England, Scotland and Wales. England = England. In any case, Ireland used to be its own country before being conquered by England, so it's more than possible that he was there all along, with Scotland and Wales, it's just that in those times there were no world meetings.
 * Not a theory, it's already canon. Word of God says that Arthur is England, but he represents the UK at meetings because his brothers get too rowdy. Ireland is its own country, and would represent itself.

Conversely, America inherited his looks from one of the Nordic countries. Canada may also apply.
While it's still debatable, many scholars do agree that the Nordics were likely the first outsiders to set foot in the North American continent. And in the "Fight for America" strips, there was a panel possibly hinting that America and Finland shared a resemblance to each other. And given Canada and America's physical similarities, it's likely they have the same Nordic origins.
 * Considering how there has been evidence found for early Viking settlements in Canada that predate Columbus by a few hundred years, having America and Canada descended from the early Nordic warriors wouldn't be that much of a stretch.
 * Columbus' landing had nothing to do with either America or Canada. He dind't land anywhere near them. It more has to do with the eventual Spanish domination of South America than anything.
 * Didn't it say somewhere that America got looks from Germanic heritage? It would make sense, with how much of the population and culture can boast it, but am I remembering incorrectly?
 * It didn't say anything about his looks, just that he mixed with a lot of Germanic blood. It's probably just in reference to German-American being the biggest ethnic group in the US. Chibi-America still looked like non-chibi-America, anyway, before he got more German settlers.
 * But that depends on whether something like immigration can alter a nation's personal appearance. The US population is becoming increasingly Hispanic/Latino, so does that mean America could, theoretically, look like a Latino in the future?
 * In the Christmas Bloodbath 2010, Finland tells America he can think of him as his father, because "You've got some genes from my people". I think Himaruya is definitely leaning towards this.
 * I just pictured a family photo with Finland, Sweden, Sealand, America and Canada. It's actually a fairly cute image.

England used to have several more siblings
Or at the least several more people living in his house. Prior to the Norman Conquest, England was made up of several kingdoms which didn't really get along all that well, ergo Arthur had a bigger family and there was a lot of sibling rivalry. What happened after the kingdoms were all merged into one is uncertain; either they're still in England's house like Prussia's still in Germany's, or, more likely, they ceased to exist, which might explain why England took America ditching him so hard (losing most of your family is going to leave you a little fragile, even after several centuries).
 * Lets see, the Heptarchy was made up of seven kingdoms,Northumbria, Mercia, East Anglia, Essex, Kent, Sussex and Wessex, although Northumbria itself was made up of two kingdoms, Deira and Bernicia, and there was another seven or so smaller kingdoms/sub-kingdoms. Add in the rest of the British Isles and you've got a really big family which based on history suffered from a serious case of sibling rivalry.
 * Given that the word 'England' was first used long after the Anglo-Saxon kingdoms came into being, they were probably his older siblings, who depending on which kingdom had the most power at the time took turns raising England after their mother died until they ceased to exist round about the time of the Norman Conquest (some might have gone before then) and kiddie England went from being the fought over and possibly much loved baby of a large, unruly and frankly somewhat dysfunctional family to being on his own apart from three surviving siblings (Scotland, Wales and Ireland) who didn't like him. Poor Arthur.
 * Well, most things were made up of multiple parts; what became Germany was made up of 39 different states after the HRE collapsed. What happened to them is really up to how small of a body fans want to mandate a Nation-Tan require. Most say that once a culture stops recognizing them, they die; so chances are a great deal of them are dead. But then there are others who say that there are those that change into regions (in the way that states for the US become personified), so depending on how you read the canon some might still be alive...
 * Hmm, good point. Let's see, Wessex no longer exists in any capacity so he's a goner. Kent managed to survive more or less intact, territory wise, so they might still be hanging around, although I don't know if they fit the culture requirement. Speaking of which, given the fact that northeners consider themselves separate from southeners, at least one or two of the Northumbrias might still be hanging in there, although on the other hand they got put through the wringer more then the others because of the whole Danelaw thing. Gah, this whole thing's getting the better of me. If I could draw properly I'd probably be drawing the various personifications in question by now.
 * Seeing as how Alfred the Great and his descendants, being the kings of Wessex, were the ones to unite England as a Kingdom, maybe England is Wessex. Or at least his immediate Successor. Seeing as how Mercia was the predominant kingdom of the Heptarchy, based in central England, Iggy could have started out life as him (the rulers of Mercia often took the title "Bretwalda", meaning "Britain Wielder", roughly meaning "High King of Britain/England"). Alternatively, England is the result of an amalgamated Wessex and Mercia (definitely them, but possibly including some of the other kingdoms) merged into a single kingdom. Supporting this is the fact that Alfred allowed the Mercians to keep some of their autonomy, rather than outright annexing them to Wessex. This, combined with his patronage of vernacular Old English and a focus on unification, would have caused Wessex, Mercia, and the others to be subsumed into a larger English identity.
 * The term 'bretwalda' wasn't just applied to the Mercian kings, it was used to refer to the king of whichever kingdom held the most power, something which, given that the Anglo-Saxon period was basically a series of brawls, changed rather frequently. The first one to really earn the title was Edwin of Northumbria. Not that it really matters, just thought I'd provide some free education. Incidently, out of the Hepetarchy the Northumbria brothers are the ones who are most likely to still be around.
 * I like to imagine England killed most of his siblings, just for the amusing mental image of him and some of the other nations sitting around drinking tea and calmly discussing the days when this was normal. Beware the Nice Ones.

Evgeni Plushenko is actually Russia in disguise.

 * You've gotta admit, the resemblance is uncanny.

Alternatively...

In accordance with the theory that nation-tans exist, Plushenko is a clone of Russia.

 * Not content with the Cold War simply being over and done with, Russia decided to continue the confrontation on another front--namely, professional figure skating. Plushenko was cloned, educated, and trained as the world's first potentially superhuman figure skater, having been cloned from Russia's body so that he would develop all the optimal traits of the Russian people but also be saner.
 * Plushenko's performance at the Vancouver Olympics exposed a few flaws in the cloning technology, allowing Russia's original personality to leak through in the event of a loss or breakdown.
 * Or, if the whole gods/demigods WMG is true, Plushenko is really Russia's son.
 * Which would mean that nations can have kids with humans. Hmm. This requires further thought.

Alfred is Multilingual

 * Case in point (Better data is available here for download). When you're talking the United States, you're fairly hard pressed to find not only a culture that isn't represented, but isn't represented in bulk. It stands to reason that, with the settlers concentrating more strongly from these two areas than others, Alfred would most likely be fluent in Spanish and German. If we're going to make smaller regions a representation of the whole, he'd also have French, Chinese, Russian, and Italian (and others) under his belt.
 * Or, at least, he had them at one point. Alfred isn't exactly known for being the most culturally aware, and it could be that he took them all and assimilated them as quickly as possible so that he could stick with what he already knew. With Hispanic immigration as high as it is, though, there's at least one he can't avoid...
 * I'd have to disagree with this theory. Not only for one does it go against America's personality (his world map is only of North America, thus I doubt he'd actually realise that there are languages other than English or the common language that all the nations use to talk to each other) but also Americans are not exactly known for being culturally accepting. Not meaning to insult any Americans here, but most of the world does see (or at least stereotype) the American populace as being ignorant of other cultures. As Hetalia is playing off that stereotype, making America Multi-lingual would throw off the ignorant stereotype he's portraying. Also, when studying Linguistics (hence a link can't be supplied if anyone wishes to see for themselves), we were given statistics of the percentages of the three main English dominate speaking nations (Britain, America and Australia) and on a "national" (meaning how many people in the nation they got to do the survey) scale only 41-2% spoke a language other than English. This shows a surprisingly low amount of bilinguals living in America, although it is very culturally diverse. In comparison, in the less culturally diverse nation of Britain, 86% spoke a language other than English. This doesn't support America being a multi-lingual if someone like England - who sees smaller immigration rates per year (America sees 2.92 immigrants per 1,000 people, whereas the UK as a whole sees 2.17 immigrants per 1,000 people according to this site = ) - has double the amount of citizens who speak more than one language. Also, America has not federally established any Multicultural Policies, despite other Western nations like Canada, Argentina, the UK, Netherlands, Australia (despite not being in the West is still counted), and most other nations in central Europe have done so. Going to the other Wiki, and looking up "Multiculturalism" then scrolling down to the section about the US will reinstate this, and also mention that there's a prominent national myth about going to the US and having one's culture assimilated into the American culture. Statistically and just on the basis of stereotyping, there is too low a chance of America being multilingual - if Himaruya does bring multilingualism in the US up at all, then my best bet would be as a side note, rather than an actual depiction of it in the series itself.
 * Alternatively America is multilingual but is unaware of it and can only speak other languages with his people, thinking that he's just speaking different dialects. This Troper read a very good fanfic working off this theory.
 * In terms of linguistics, that'd be one hell of a stretch. If nothing else, keeping a sentence agreeable in gender is quite a new experience for English speakers (and that's hardly scratching the surface of the differences between English and everything else). That he could switch into something else when speaking to, let's say, his Spanish-speaking population (the roughly 30 million of them) without realizing it was something beyond dialect isn't really possible. Even for Alfred.
 * Especially now, with all the arguments of English vs. Spanish, he's well aware.

Canada is Multilingual

 * If America, who prefers the 'melting pot' approach to culture, is multilingual, (He may very well speak Spanish or German.) then Canada most certainly speaks languages other than English and French. These would include Chinese, Portuguese, Punjabi, Spanish, Italian and Ukrainian, as well as First Nations' languages, almost all of which are preserved, and many are still taught in schools.

America is Captain America (comics)
Kind of obvious really.
 * Would relate to the Black Panther is the Nation-tan of Wakanda theory above. The identity of Steve Rogers was invented as a cover-up so nobody would suspect the very personification of America would be doing something so risky as to fight alongside his own men. The super-soldier formula never truly existed and and was conveniently "lost" after being used on "Steve Rogers." On one hand, it kept the Germans on their toes knowing that America had found a way to create super soldiers, and on the other, allowed and explanation for Captain America's powers. During the Cold War, he was placed in Cold Storage and temporarily replaced as Captain America by somebody else to keep him safe in case Russia decided to fire his nukes or something. He was later taken out of storage and now operates a double identity both as Alfred the nation and Steve Rogers the superhero because he's "The Hero."
 * He bugged every director he could find, and he finally did it. He got a movie made about himself.
 * So... Did Germany or Prussia know about the whole H.Y.D.R.A. thing, or was Red Skull working independent from the country at the time and therefore didn't know about the personifications?
 * What if Peggy Carter was actually an alias of Nyo!England, who resigned from her work early and eventually faked her death to take up another alias? If so, then the news about a certain "Steve Rogers" turning up could lead to more than a few interesting questions...

France had stronger genes than England.
All of England's colonies have his giant eyebrows except for America, Canada, and Seychelles who were also French colonies.
 * Those with English eyebrows are those who were English to begin with. Those with French characteristics started as French colonies. And, in the case of America, he was born before France and England arrived, so he has neither of their genes in him.
 * When you say English to begin with, do you mean colonised by England first? Because the British were the first colonisers in New Zealand, but New Zealand doesn't have the eyebrows. If you meant it as claimed by England first, then how does that explain Australia having the eyebrows when he was first claimed by the Dutch, French, Spanish, Russians, etc before the British decided to just go there and colonise anyway? Also there's the native Indigenous peoples of these countries, which are arguably the first settlers of these nations before the Europeans even came around. Sorry, I'm just not seeing your point clearly because I'm not sure what you meant by it exactly.
 * I think what the OP meant was that Britain's culture was the dominant one - which, as this part-Australian troper attests, is fairly accurate. And New Zealand does have the eyebrows.

China is secretly a girl.
Think about it. Women are constantly portrayed as being "weaker" in China, and when the bosses found out that their nation-tan was female, they forced her to hide her gender and pretend to be a guy. And besides, PLEASE tell me I wasn't the only one who thought China was a girl when I first saw him? >.>
 * Given that China's seiyuu had roles occasionally dropping bridgets on other people, this come at no surprise.
 * Oh, I would really like this to be true, but it would ruin the tension!
 * If China was secretly a girl, it seems doubtful that he would ever take off his shirt in front of anyone else, even if - or especially if - it was another nation. Also, when he turns around a little in the link, he appears to lack female breasts. (Sorry, Korea.)
 * Sort of impossible, but it would explain Hong Kong. Daddy!England and Mommy!China?
 * It occurred to this troper while watching the episode where China meets Baby!Japan that...well, China has very small feet. Although, obviously after the 2010 Bloodbath and that cute Mandarin dress, China's got to a be a guy...or seriously flat chested.
 * This troper likes to think that he went through a gender-swaped version of what I like to call Hungarian Gender Confusion-that is, (as the name implies,) when one drops a Bridget on themselves.
 * We have seen his chest, but depending on when that strip was set it may not rule out post-top-surgery FTM.

England lied about his height.
By now it's pretty obvious that he's not as tall as France and there's a lot more than just 2 cm between him and America. Knowing how self-conscious he can be, it's more than possible that he lied to make people think he's taller. (Let's just conveniently forget about the fact that Himaruya writes him.)
 * To England and France, historically, them being of different heights in actuality but not in number is a very real possibility. There was a good period of time in which the English measuring system and the French one were different, with the French feet slightly larger (which is why we get myths such as Napoleon being very short). I can't think of an explanation for America, so it could be very well that he maintains this due to his self-consciousness.

If Nantucket is America's cowlick, then the rest of his hair is the Corn Belt.
It makes sense. Corn is milky yellow/golden, and so is America's hair.
 * I always thought of the corn belt as his digestive system, personally.

Russia and Ukraine are France x England shippers.
See this. No reason, just Rule of Funny.

America is a post-op female-to-male transsexual.
Florida is America's wang but was not one of the original 13 colonies. So America must not have been born with a wang.
 * He was always referred to as male, though, long before he even attempted to a acquire Florida.
 * Everyone (in-universe) referred to Italy as a girl before finding out (even Italy), and they also thought Hungary was a boy. Clearly nation-tans are a bad judge of gender.
 * Italy never said he was a girl, as far as I know. Heck, he even almost reveals his true gender to HRE in that strip about his dream meeting Japan, not to mention getting all flustered and allowing Hungary to go bathe before him in Hungary-san and her Maiden's Heart and then in another strip showing no concern about getting nude and swimming with HRE. Not to mention that even though Austria thought was female and thus bought him dresses and such, he was technically raised by his granddad Rome along with Romano, and I'd sure as hell hope that he'd know his own grandson's gender. Of course, I could always be missing out on something (like an official statement by Himaruya, for example) but there hasn't been any indication that Italy was "gender-confused".
 * True, but the logic to make him female originally is faulty, and asserting literal gender change moves well beyond mistake. The theory is saying that expansion would mean body parts would be added for each gained territory, and that makes no sense especially in context of characters like America who expanded from about 375 thousand miles to almost 4 million. That, and it suggests that for a character to be male they need a phallic body of land, which is again in contrast to the series which makes genitalia (male or female) an important region rather than a suggestive one.
 * Three things; One- It was kind of a joke theory anyway, for some reason my joke theories (regardless of fandom) are always taken dead seriously and nitpicked even when (I think) it should be obvious it's a joke. Two- I'd say making two islands someone's nipples is a little on the suggestive side, although admittedly not on the level of what I'm suggesting would be. Three- I'm not saying that a nation-tan needs a suggestive geographic feature to be a particular gender, I'm saying that if a nation-tan is already particular gender and has a suggestive geographic feature that correlates to that gender there may be a relation. This theory came from fridge logic related to that.
 * Joke theories don't work when they're no more ridiculous than the normal ones...

America is kept in the dark about what his government does.
When America goes to visit Japan, it seems like he's oblivious about what his boss actually wants and is really just there to befriend Japan and some whales. Also, the anime episode that introduces Tony properly pretty much has a Mood Whiplash when America's boss tells him that it wasn't a UFO but a fallen weather balloon. The colors are extremely dark, and his boss practically says "shut up, stop bothering us." And right after that scene, Tony comes up to America and befriends him. With the personality that America has, it could explain why he pretends he can't read the atmosphere - if he read the atmosphere his politicians gave off all the time, he'd get depressed and paranoid.
 * We've already seen this same thing with Germany, Japan, and the Italys, and it's been shown that the Nation-Tans will be allowed to cry, scream, and eventually be hit if they don't agree. I'm pretty sure that's how it is for everyone: they don't get so much explanations as orders for what they're supposed to do. In the same way, they never seem to be consulted about what they'd feel towards a certain action before they have to carry it out.
 * As if there weren't already enough reasons to dislike politicians.

A nation-tan in the style of America is one of the unidentified people in The Situation Room.
For reference, that's a well-known photograph of high-ranking government officials receiving live updates of the operation to kill Osama bin Laden. Obviously the Alfred F. Jones we know isn't in there because someone would have noticed by now if there were a set of people with the same names as the nation-tans who also resembled them, but multiple fics have portrayed the American government as explaining Alfred's presence by his being a security expert of some kind, which would fit very well with this situation. My money would be on the guy they call "John".

Russia actually has a friend
Not a relative, not someone who happens to share the same political system, not someone he's intimidated into submission, but an actual friend. Said friend is Australia, according to an Hetalia-verse interpretation of this, and before you ask, yes, the fandom knows about this (well some of them anyway) and there have been a couple of fics but for once they've managed to keep things platonic, well so far anyway.
 * For some reason, the idea of Russia being friends with the land of Everything Trying to Kill You seems weirdly fitting.
 * From the Aussies With Artillery page, regarding why invading Australia is a bad idea: "It's like Russia. In Russia if you invade you can keep marching until you freeze to death. Invade North West Australia and you can keep marching until you die of heatstroke." They have things in common!
 * Russians were also guests of honor in Australia for many years. Australians once let Russian visitors survey the land of Port Jackson and Botany bay including Military Fortifications which did not raise any eyebrows with Australians at the time (Though for the Brits and the rest of Europe it caused a Red Scare) and the city of Darwin was owned by the USSR for three days due to communication problems.
 * If India is ever created he or she might be good friends with Russia, or might be someone that Russia is quite protective of as is more in character for him and also historically canon.
 * Ireland is another possibility, though they might have had a falling out by now due to Ireland apparently supporting Georgia in the fairly recent conflict between Russia and Georgia. But since Russia (well, the USSR) was the first nation to recognize Ireland as an independent country, I could see that being the basis for a good relationship between the -tans.
 * France. Around the time Russia began being exposed to European influence under Peter the Great, Russians (aristocrats especially) showed a fascination in France. Dressing like the French and speaking it was apparently the cool thing to do. Just as well, the communist party was apparently very strong in France in 1946, later joining NATO in 1949. Even after joining there was apparently higher sympathy towards the communists in France than there was the U.K. or the U.S..
 * Also, when in the episode where Russia after a meeting reveals his fantasies of deforming the other Allies' faces to France. If this troper remembers correctly, Russia repeatedly refers to "them" rather than "you all", allowing one to wonder if Russia likes France more than the others.

China is narrating the entire thing from the Future.
Since Yuki Kaida is the narrator, suppose that China is using "his" real voice as the narrator many years into the future and Hetalia is one big nostalgic flashback to happy times before humanity launched into space and all the nations got separated.
 * Alternately because Kaida also voices Taiwan, it may also be the case that Taiwan is narrating the thing from the Future as well.
 * Jossed in the dub, where China's voice actress is not the Narrator.

England is scared that Sealand will become the next America
England doted on America, and got his heart broken for it. Remembering this, when a new nation-tan appeared that was clearly his little brother, his knee jerk response was to do exactly the opposite of what he'd done with America, and declare this person was nothing to do with him. However, this had the result of Sealand declaring himself a country. England, by now, had recognised this was his little brother, but decided he didn't want him to become a country because if he did he may end up like America, more powerful than England, and it would mean England would lose another sibling, and so works against Sealand being recognised by other countries. He realised, of course, that Sealand hated him, and is trying to get him to like him, which is why in strips he's always trying to convince him to come to his house. He secretly quite likes the fact that he has to help Sealand out sometimes, as it stops him from cutting England off entirely. This is supported by the strip where he has a nightmare that Sealand grows up. Even if just thought Sealand was being an idiot, calling himself a country, he'd hardly have nightmares about it. Also, the fact that Sealand suddenly becomes taller than him is reminiscent of the strip where he says goodbye to a small America, comes back a short time later, and finds America is now taller than him. England does love Sealand really, he just doesn't want to admit it. His reaction of horror to seeing Sealand had put himself up for sale on the internet could quite easily be seen as fear for what his little brother could be getting himself into.
 * I think England might love Sealand just a little more if he'd stop shooting at his commercial fishing already.

Russia is a Warrior Cats fan.
Warrior Cats is very popular in Russia, having translated super editions and field guides that most other countries never bothered with. So surely the character himself would enjoy it as well, no? He probably likes it for all the Family-Unfriendly Violence.
 * Russia appreciating the violence makes even more sense when you consider the covers that the Russian publishers use. American Kirby Is Hardcore might as well be renamed Russian Warriors Is Hardcore.
 * Come to think of it, China seems to like the series a lot, too.
 * Bit of a misconception there: The books that everyone believes are from China are actually published in Taiwan. The Simplified Chinese translation, which is published in China, only goes up to the first series, so Taiwan is likely a much bigger fan. This also raises the possibility of Russia and Taiwan secretly being obsessed with England, being the Warriors authors' home country.
 * Official list of nations who have at least encountered Warriors: America, Canada, England, Taiwan, Japan, China, Russia, Germany, Poland, Lithuania, Finland, Slovenia, Turkey, the Czech Republic, Korea, Hungary, Vietnam, and France. Germany, too, seems to be particularly fond of the books.

England is a big fan of cars.
And secretly, he's The Stig. Some say he's an immortal representative of England...
 * So England is Ben Collins?
 * Well, no, but there is speculation that there's more than one Stig, right? England can't always have time to do this secret side-job, so he lets Ben Collins fill in for him and throw everybody off his trail. After all, a proper English gentleman doesn't recklessly drive really fast cars.

Alfred really gets around
The states. To get them America had to make a lot of treaties and such.
 * Spain gave America his Florida.
 * We didn't even need the states to make that assumption. America "Fuck Yeah!" Jones!

France's sexual "reputation" was spurred by Jeanne d'Arc's death and the Revolution
There may have been a point where Francis would have had something akin to a decently sane love life. And it's likely that his relationship with St. Joan would have been genuinely one of love, if not for her burning at the stake. After that, he couldn't take is as seriously for fear of losing another partner. Then came Marie Antoinette and the French Revolution...
 * The French have always been thought of as sex-hounds, though.
 * Word of God says France had completely forgotten about Joan of Arc until Napoleon mentioned her, and there's no reason to assume he was any closer to Marie Antoinette than he was any of his other queens.
 * A recent strip seems to suggest otherwise.
 * Which is hilarious because the French people blamed Marie Antoinette, an Austrian Princess, for running their finances into the ground, which inevitably started the French Revolution.

Muscovy (ur-Russia? USSR-tan?) gained control of the other Soviet countries by killing them and eating their hearts, or at least some physical symbol of their essence.
Whether this is because Russia is Cute and Psycho or (one of the reasons) why Russia is Cute and Psycho has yet to be determined.
 * It definitely sounds like something Russia would do. At the very least, I could see him doing it as a symbolic gesture, to the utter horror of any nation-tan who witnessed the act or heard about it later.

== China was born / first appeared sometime during the Three Sovereigns and Five Emperors Period, or between that period and the Xia Dynasty period. == Logically, this seems like the best bet. China is often mentioned as being approximately 4000 years old. This fits pretty well with the traditional chronology of Chinese history, where the Xia Dynasty was supposedly established in roughly 2100 BC, having been born out of the earlier "San-huang wu-ti", which has many elements of older mythological and cultural traditions, and roughly ends somewhere around 2000 BC. Considering the fact that it was a very long time ago, and there's lots we don't know about those periods (much of it comes from oral, later written, and archaeological sources), its not at all surprising that these periods overlap.

Now then: China, like many nations, likely appeared as a small child when a form of cultural and national identity appeared among the people living in this region. This may have happened during the end of the "San-huang wu-ti", as it eased into the Xia Dynasty Period. He may have been "found" by one of his earliest bosses, and brought to live in the courts with the most important members of their society. China's growth probably mirrored Italy's over the intervening centuries, with "Chibi China" representing the late "San-huang wu-ti" and early Xia, older kid China during the later Xia Dynasty and the Shang Period, young teen China during the Zhou Dynasty (likely the Western Zhou Period), and his older teen form during the Eastern Zhou (known to us as the "Spring and Autumn Period" and later the more famous "Warring States Period"). This would be when he was truly maturing as a nation, and began seeing himself as the "Middle Kingdom". He would fully mature into his adult form upon the accession of Qin Shi Huang as the first emperor of Imperial China, under the "Qin Dynasty". This would mark a turning point in his life, being that it was founded around 221 BC (when he was roughly 2000 years old). From this point on, after being unified under the Qin (and later the Han), China began acting as a "Big Brother" figure to the other East Asian nations. Japan is, after all, first mentioned by the Chinese in the "Book of Han" (a collection of writings detailing the later Han period). He would not, however, begin taking serious lessons from China until after he meets Korea and begins borrowing culture and knowledge from them later in the 1st millennium AD.

Addendum: During the early history of China, such as during his "chibi" days and the Warring States Period, there may have been "rival" Chinas. These small states, if they had any regional identity, would have had to have been either killed by or absorbed into China, possibly helping to facilitate his growth. However, it is unlikely that any rival states appeared during later periods of unrest. By the time of the Three Kingdoms, or the Southern Song, the idea of "One China" had long since been established. Any rulers of rival kingdoms saw themselves as contenders to the Mandate of Heaven, not the founders of their own national states. Thus, China merely suffered from the fatigue of civil war, or possible split-personality disorder at worst. The reason there is a Hong Kong and Taiwan is because Hong Kong existed as a British colony for many years, has a fusion of Chinese culture and British Colonial society as his background, and is treated as a special zone in China (Macau may also exist as a Portuguese equivalent). Taiwan, meanwhile, had its own indigenous cultures which still exist on may parts of the island. This, on top of having a similar experience with Japan as Hong Kong had with Britain, as well as merely being settled and Sinicized rather than an inherent part of China's boundaries (remember, the ROC government is merely hosted in Taiwan, considering itself rightful ruler of all China. Many Taiwanese are fine with independence, as well). This is why a Tibet- and Mongolia-tan also exist.
 * Given how the Warring States all had their own identity which were retained by their successor provinces, they could have just been China's older siblings who passed on their skills and personality and currently live in his house as retired nations. The reason that China doesn't remember his first dynasties very well was because he almost died during the Warring States period and thus experienced memory problems when he was re-unified.
 * So his memory problems could be similar to those following the HRE=Germany theory... interesting.... Of course, for all we know, the other Chinese siblings may have in fact moved up in the cosmic ranks... and have become China's Dragon! Also, his memory loss could be due to the book burnings that took place when the first Dynasty of the Imperial China came about. Shi Huangdi didn't want there to be any history that preceded him, after all.

Russia was originally just his own capital Moscow.
Russia as Muscovy had to fight with other Russian states like Novgorod for the dominance of the Russian lands. As these states fell, he incorporated them to his territory, which later he was known as Russia.
 * It goes without saying that this is pretty much history canon. It would also explain, along with the Mongol Hordes, why Russia is as completely insane and dangerous as he is.

England was at one point married to Queen Elizabeth I.
It's historical canon. She stated that she was married to her country. Bring that to its logical conclusion, and...
 * I've seen several fics with this pairing. Really, it was just too good to pass up.

Although they may arguably not be particularly close or talk to each other much, Japan is aware of Canada's existence.
Just look at the sheer amount of Sister Cities they seem to share, especially in northern Japan (particularly Hokkaido). One search command will get you at least 37 by my computer's count. They haven't had enough interaction to be sure about this, but even the countries aware of Canada can forget him from time to time, such as at the G8. It would also make sense, since a guy as observant as Japan who hangs out with America so much would pick up on the differences between the two North American brothers.

The "F." in America/Alfred F. Jones's name comes from:
Make your guesses! "What does the F stand for? According to my first note, it seems like Foster. But I wrote a lot around it, like Franklin and F*ck, the mystery of F deepens and deepens..."
 * Freedom!
 * Fuck England!
 * It's a reference to Alfred E. Neuman!
 * Fuck yeah!
 * Fernandez
 * France/Francis made him add it as payment for helping him in The American Revolution!
 * It's probably reference to Alfred E Neuman, as said on his page but troper considers it either Francis or Franklin. The Other Wiki also said that the 'F' is for John F. Kennedy.
 * Odds are, the Alfred comes from the ship, Jones comes from one or all of the Jones mentioned, and "F" stands for ALL of the above, that way the fans can choose which one they like most and stick with it. On another note, I like how one possible explanation for Alfred is the USS Alfred, since it fits with Canada's name coming from the Matthew.
 * Word of God says about this:

== The 2010 Christmas Bloodbath, when all the nations are trying to find some secret mark on their bodies for a reason that boils down to strip-or-the-world-blows-up and they wind up trying to strip Russia... == They are actually gang-raping him. I mean, Russia occupies the Woobie role extraordinarily well throughout the special. And if you ask a Russian this is historically accurate.
 * Owch. Yes, Russia is The Woobie, but way to ruin the mood of those strips.

America was named after his mother.
This troper thinks America was a Indian tribe that was the original representation of the country and Spain named America. Later, for some reason, England named her son after her. That's why America has a girly name.
 * History disagrees with you very much, my friend; the name 'America' is based of the Latin form of the masculine name 'Amerigo.' Plus, the name was coined by a German.

England is the biological father of America. He just didn't realize it when they first met.
This troper find it to be a HUGE Plot Hole to believe a European baby could suddenly appear in a country of people that look nothing like him. Besides, had it not been for the English, the USA would be far different then what it is now!
 * There's no Plot Hole. Europeans were colonizing, and because of that a new Tan was born.
 * On the other point, England didn't father America. America was running around before England even showed up on the continent (that's canon). Because of the original settlers in his territory his lineage is, in fact, Nordic (regardless of which colony believed to have founded him, they all pretty much came from the same area). England's contribution was to colonize effectively, which allowed America to age up, but it had nothing to do with his birth.
 * Their official connection is 'brother' as well, so...
 * Alternatively, all of England's insistence that he's their parent leads Canada and America to tease him.
 * Except England is not and has never claimed to be their parent. Guys, remember to check the actual manga sometimes.
 * It was a joke, geez.

England is Germania's bastard son.
If his siblings are Ireland, Scotland, and Wales, it raises the question of why he's the only non-Celt in the family. Since that part of Britain wasn't really England before the Angles and Saxons took over, it's the only answer that makes sense.
 * There is some proof of continued Celtic influence on English culture, as well as there having been the (now mostly extinct) Cornish and Cumbric languages. So it could be possible that England is Germania's bastard son with an earlier Celtic nation-tan. Alternatively, England is in fact Celtic by birth, but has become one of the Germanic family through adoption similar to America (this could have also happened to Prussia, a Baltic state that became Germanized).
 * I'm inclined to go with the adoption theory, because, as said, we know that Scotland and Wales, at least, are his brothers, and Himaruya has never given any indication that he may be related to Germany. We could really do with knowing when England actually appeared; whether it was after the country was established or if he just got a name change when that happened.

== For a brief and very sad period in history, America/Alfred would have misconstrued some instructions from his boss and wound up calling France/Francis "Freedom". France was very pleased as he is rather free with his hands. == I nearly insisted on referring to a certain very important revolution as the "Freedom Revolution" in my European history class...which would have been really quite accurate.

America is Stephen Colbert
Or rather, Stephen Colbert is America in disguise. Or maybe not in disguise. Because, let's be honest, it just makes sense. He's even admitted it before. He wrote a book about it.
 * And so can we. (Everyone can be America.)

England's tattoo represents Liverpool
In his version of Marukaite Chikyuu England says "my tattoo really hurts, but it's a hot six string!" Considering we've had birthmarks, nipples, idiot hairs and glasses representing specific places, I think this probably does too. And I think Liverpool is a likely candidate.

England is both England and the UK
He has a split personality that gradually developed as he unified with his siblings. He may have some control over which personality takes over at which times, but considering the general British stereotypes are those of the English, they're probably quite similar anyway. In fact, it's quite possible most people wouldn't notice if the personality were to switch while he was with them. Possibly, he never actually told any of the other nations, and when he demands they call him Britain rather than England they just assume he's saying that's who he's representing.
 * Himayura has stated that while he and his brothers act as the UK, England is the one who represents them as a whole in the meetings. Or something like that.
 * It's because his brothers are too rowdy, but you're right. With how much people take pride and identify themselves as Scottish, Welsh, and Irish, they're definitely still alive. It would be interesting, though, to see the state of his brothers (since England has so much power in the UK, and even strips which take place in the Isles never show the others).
 * Sorry, I didn't explain the guess properly. The theory doesn't mean the other UK nations are dead; rather, it's based on an idea I've come across where the UK as a whole has a personification as well as the individual contries within it. That applies here, except that the UK is a split personality of England, rather than a completely separate person, based on the aforementioned stereotypes thing, and the fact that English people are more likely to identify themselves as British than people from the rest of Britain. Also, that many people seem to think 'England' and 'Britain' are interchangeable. Really, no matter how rowdy they are, I think England would have difficulty convincing Scotland in particular to let him represent all of them. If the other UK nations knew that the person representing them was actually the UK, it might go down a bit better, as that person would represent all of them. Although the other nations thinking they were talking to England might still cause some issue...
 * With the clarification, this theory makes sense. I'd think that the other Tans might not know he's still England, though. Consider that, after the point the nations united, everything became known as British with who had been England as the head. Everybody, after not seeing his brothers as much if at all, might just figure he'd gone through a very-common name change.

The real reason why Russia always wears his scarf is...
C'mon, let us hear your ideas!
 * He uses it to cover a nasty scar on his neck.
 * It reminds him of the warmer memories of his childhood.
 * It's keeping his head on. He was actually decapitated at some point and somehow managed to survive (well, if he can survive his heart falling out...) but he doesn't want to alarm the other nations.
 * It's canon (or, at least, he says it's canon) that it's a body part and he literally cannot take it off.
 * Jossed He is shown without it in the first volume of the manga
 * I'm just repeating what Russia, himself, said. The quote about him not being able to remove it comes from the CD's, though, so comes down to exactly what level of canon you consider them.
 * And just how reliable you consider Russia's word to be...
 * He's Russia and he can do what he wants.
 * (Referring to the above Body Part theory) It's a removeable erogenous zone. And whenever someone touches it, he gets all nice and dere like in the strip where Lithuania falls asleep on his shoulder and they talk about their dreams.
 * But he's not wearing it in the first few minutes of paint it white...

In combat since WW 2, England assumes the identity of Captain Price.
It's not that hard to imagine "Arthur Kirkland" serving alongside and befriending the aforementioned soldier at some point during the WW 2-era games. At some point, however, the original Price gets killed in action, prompting England to take his identity in memory of the man. But as the War drew to a close, he decided to retain the name and mustached appearance as his cover whenever entering combat alongside humans. Besides, how else could he survive the sort of crap he's gone through?

Russia ships Austria/Hungary and has been doing so for the past two hundred years.
Observe.
 * In 1956 Hungary had a falling out with Russia... And it's worth noting that in 1848 Russia "bringing them together" involved rushing in and literally crushing Hungary's army. (That's hardcore shipping for you...)
 * It said in the notes that after the 1956 rebellion was crushed, Austria had a "hostile attitude to communist Hungary", and that Russia helped to reconcile them.

The British Empire was dismantled to save England's life.
Rome started to age, and eventually died, when his empire fell. England refers to himself several times in the series as "the great British Empire". Although obviously he never literally represented the empire countries, it doesn't seem implausible that having so much territory would change his status in some way. Maybe at some point England noticed a couple of wrinkles or a grey hair. Someone realised that this meant his days were numbered, and so it was decided to grant independence peacefully to the colonies before they tore the empire apart and England suffered the same fate as Rome.
 * Well, and there were some pesky little things called World Wars...
 * That doesn't discredit the guess, does it? The guess was that England started to subtly age, realised what that meant, and it was decided to get rid of the empire (although some people grasped the seriousness of the situation better than others). How does it affect the guess if the wars contributed to that situation?
 * Well, the wars kind of made Britain weak and nearly bankrupt. Which is why it didn't even try to keep its empire together anymore, it just didn't have the money and the resources. Just before WWI Britain fought the Second Boer War trying to expand its empire. After WWII it pretty much let go most of its colonies because it had to focus on rebuilding Britain itself.
 * Yes, it couldn't keep the empire together, so it didn't try. Why can't that translate to Hetalia terms as England looking like he might die if the empire didn't go peacefully? Am I just missing the objection here?
 * The point is, the empire didn't fall apart because England noticed a couple of wrinkles or a grey hair and thought that at this rate he would die. The Second Boer War was fought technically "minutes" before WWI to expand the empire. It was because the war left Britain weak and exhausted.
 * OK, I get the point now. Still, I think the guess has some merit if I'd worded it so that it said that after the wars England started to age, which corresponded to the real life problems in Britain. So as well as the issues in terms of the country, the nation-tan also seemed to be in trouble.
 * That makes sense considering Japan was showing signs of old age (high blood pressure and a bad back) during WWII.

China made the same mistake as Hungary, only in reverse.

 * As an alternative theory to the castration one above, so far there are four confirmed ancients in canon, and two of those four are female. Considering the fact that women had more outlets and chances for some type of power in the ancient world even if they still weren't equal to men, a lot of the ancient nation-tans were likely female. Presumably China, at 4,000 years old, is one of the "younger" ancients, so he could very well have grown up around female -tans and assumed that he too was female. Obviously he no longer believes this, but he might still be more comfortable in more feminine clothes/still considers himself feminine in some ways. This would explain both his androgynous style and his drawing of himself that looks like a woman. Supported by Nyotalia China having tomboyish clothing in her sketch (though YMMV, I guess); she would have grown up around primarily male ancients and made the exact same error as Hungary.

England has travelled with the Doctor.
Simple logic: in this strip, England knew exactly when America's computer would be made (thinking about it, this implies America has also had some contact with the Time Lord), and considering the Doctor has been fighting off alien invaders from England's house for centuries, they're bound to know each other. When England was younger the Doctor probably took him on a trip to cheer him up (it's unlikely he'd risk it often, considering the potential England has to meddle), and England was so awestruck by the latest model computers it somehow stuck in his mind all those years.
 * This has a logical conclusion. Why doesn't Gakuen!England want anyone to know what his Christmas is like? Well, if Doctor Who and Hetalia are the same universe then England gets invaded by aliens at Christmas! He doesn't want anyone to know because he's utterly convinced that they won't believe him.
 * That... that is just brilliant.

China was originally planned to be unveiled as a girl.
An earlier guess is that China is a girl. We've seen enough now to know that this isn't true. But just looking at him, he is too feminine. Apart from the obvious lack of breasts, he really did look female in that dress from the Christmas bloodbath. I propose that Himaruya originally designed him with the thought in that back of his mind that he would one day drop a Bridget on the readers. However, he never acted on it and sort of forgot about it. It may occasionally have drifted back into his mind, and may even have still been lingering when the anime was cast. By now, though, there's been too much evidence to say he isn't, so the idea has been dropped.

The plans Alfred makes get boxed, à la Office
In The Office, complaints are filed into a box until the complainant has forgotten about it and moved on. This is the same method used to handle Alfred in the War Room, since he's much too powerful to simply shoo out. Actual (discarded) US war plans read like a teen obsessed with comic books: nuking the moon (or at least building a military base on it), LSD experiments, psychic soldiers, killer fungus, and exploding animals. The only way the military can get things done, and not make a complete fool of itself, is to file and pretend to prepare for these until Alfred has gotten bored and forgotten all about them.

America's glasses
They're actually a Tragic Keepsake from Republic of Texas, a small child living in Mexico's house, who he became friends with. Texas moved out, which Mexico was forced to accept after fighting with him. But then Texas moved in with America, leading to bad blood between Mexico and America. Texas lost his life in the ensuing Mexican-American war, but entrusted his glasses to America in his final moments and caused him to go on a Roaring Rampage of Revenge, ending in America seizing a significant amount of land from Mexico and growing into the "adult" he is today. It explains this.

Russia has the heart of a child... and he keeps it in his coat pocket.
In this strip Russia's heart manages to pop out from the side of his chest rather than the center where one's heart is normally located because he keeps it in an inside pocket of his coat.
 * Um...the heart is normally located in the left side of the chest. That's why, when you sing your national anthem, you usually put your right hand across your chest onto the left side and over your heart.
 * It's slightly to the left, but closer to the center than most people think. When you cover your "heart" for the national anthem, you're more likely covering a lung.

That one song (Tetris theme) does not appear in Russia's MKC because it's russian
Hear me out. America's been staring at the wall funny ever since he sent Lithuania for batteries. He's clutching his gameboy color like it could save his life. In the other hand is a game cartrage. He's softly humming a song- one that Russia recognizes. Russia asks him about it, and he tells Russia it's this "Totally awesome game (he) can't stop playing!" and that he "can see it everywhere. So Russia decides to try his hand. And he kicks ass at it. So America convinces him to put it in the song, saying everyone will think it's what you assumed it was. And when that part plays, Russia steps away from the mic to play through the first level of tetris really fast.
 * That makes too much sense to be ignored.

The inspiration for the Jones in America's name came from Junie B. Jones.
Don't tell me you haven't thought of it.
 * Actually I had always thought it had come from Indiana Jones.

In the Christmas 2007 strip, when a drunken England reveals that someone broke his heart, he was talking about Seychelles and not America.

 * Evidence? Not disregarding the theory, but there needs to be something to back this up.

Theres a reason Russia didn't have his scarf in the first few minutes of paint it white.
It's a long story. You see, this guy named Candle Jack cam

England was King Arthur
The original King Arthur "legend" was a diary that England kept. Later, France read it and made it into a story of his own. England had a greater hand in taking care of his people then, and was revered as something close to a king. The "Round Table" were all the other Anglo-Saxon nations that England eventually conquered. "Mordred" was a rebelling English or Celtic State. After taking him out, England gradually retreated from the public view of his people, causing the legend of the Once and Future King. Either that, or England had a psychic dream and saw America's Revolution and wrote it down in his diary as something of note. Later retellings corrupted it into an actual part of the story and connected it with England's disappearance from public view.
 * The problem with this theory is that the legend of King Arthur is of Celtic origin, and he was supposed to have fought against the invading Anglo-Saxons - that is, the English. So if anything Wales was King Arthur.
 * But your issue depends on England actually being originally Anglo-Saxon, when I'd say the evidence points towards him being a Celt who was adopted by the Germanics. After all, the rest of the UK, at least, have been confirmed as England's brothers, the other British Isles have been stated to have the bushy eyebrows, and he doesn't share any features with the nations that are definitely Germanic, nor has there been mention of him being related to them. It's quite possible that England before he was England wrote down his diary while he was still resisting the invaders, and got captured by them afterwards. Or maybe it wasn't a diary at all, just a fairy story he wrote to keep his hopes up that someone would come save him and his people.

The British brothers can trace their blood straight back to Germania and Rome
England and Wales are related to Rome and the Italy brothers. Scotland is related to Germania, Germany, Prussia, and possibly Holy Roman Empire. Historically, the Romans never managed to conquer what is now Scotland, and were actually terrified of them. However, several Germanic tribes migrated there, and spread the English language.

England has the two personifications of the Kingdom of Northumbria living with him
Northumbria was made up of two kingdoms that alternated between being so closely allied that they were considered on and the same, and trying to kill each other, hence two personifications. While most of the Hepetarchy probably went the way of the dodo, these two hung on due to a) cultural differences between north and south, b) the fact that the border between Scotland and England kept changing, and c) general stubborness. After they were Northumbria they were the Danelaw for a while, then Bernica (northern Northumbria) spent a few centuries as the border region (and probably the menace known as the Border Rievers) and is now hanging on as Berwick-on-Tweed, while Deira (southern Northumbria) who the Nordics took more of an interest in during the Danelaw era is surviving on a combination of the north-south divide and people from Yorkshire thinking of themselves as a distinct group, to the point that some of them want independence from the rest of England (although no one takes that particular group seriously).
 * In that vein, does he also have Cornwall living with him? They have the independence party, the distinct culture and hey, they even have their own language!

America can play the banjo.
LIKE A BOSS. Really, the banjo is the most American instrument ever. It only makes sense that America can play it.

America does in fact remember Canada.
He just likes to pretend he doesn't because he knows it annoys Canada to no end. They are brothers after all, and in real life they share one of the closest and most stable relationships in the world. I mean, most of the modern-day scenes featuring Canada have him interacting with America, who sees him just fine (even if he's quiet, something that seems to annoy America to no end). I imagine them hanging out a lot when they aren't busy, just being bros.

China is a female-to-male transsexual.
He has a feminine face insofar as one can tell with anime characters, his hands and feet are tiny, and while we have seen his chest, which is flat, we haven't seen him pantsless. It's not impossible the chest shot was post-mastectomy. Hence why Korea's so fixated on China's "breasts"?

America's Big Eater tendencies are a subconscious paranoia of his past
You probably think it's outrageous, but after seeing this series of works ("America the Hungry") depicting the U.S.'s history of not having enough to eat, it actually starts to make sense. He keeps some kind of food on his person at all times (at one point, he was shown to have tons of junk food hidden under his clothes) because he's afraid he won't have enough to eat again, and what with the present-day economy of America, it's probably made worse.