Jason Cosmo

"Merc:Did you know that only seven of the Eleven Kingdoms are actually kingdoms?...Zastria is a republic, Stive a theocracy, Xornos an oligarchy, and Ganth is ruled by a military dictator. Why then do we call them the Eleven Kingdoms? Jason:I suppose it would be inconvenient to speak of the Seven Kingdoms and Four Other Assorted Nation Forms"

Jason Cosmo is a sassy, Genre Savvy parody of the standard sword and sorcery epic by Dan McGirt. There are two sequels, Royal Chaos and Dirty Work.

Jason Cosmo is a humble woodcutter and turnip farmer of the village of Lower Hicksnittle in the Kingdom of Darnk, aka the Armpit of the World (which, by the way, is flat and circular, but no mention of elephants or a turtle) until his quiet evening at the tavern is ruined by a fancy foreigner with a sword claiming there is a 10 million crown bounty on the head of Jason Cosmo, and he's there to collect it. Naturally, our hero must abandon his quiet life and go out into the world to find out what this is all about.

Jason is aided in his quest by Wizard Mercury Boltblaster; Merc's true love, the Queen of Raelna; Jason's twin love interests, Rubis and Sapphrina, The League of Benevolent Magic (good wizards) and the dubious support of the immortal gods, especially the sun goddess, Rae, who has constituted herself Jason's patron deity.

The opposition consists of bounty hunters in the service of the Dark Magic Society, an organization of evil wizards bent on recreating the Empire of Fear, unleashing demons on the Eleven Kingdoms, probably raising the taxes and, of course, the great Demon Lord Asmondraxas, who is out to replace the gods.

Hilarity Ensues and just about every trope and cliche of the genre is brought into play.


 * BFS: The enchanted blade Overwhelm deserves its name.
 * Chronic Hero Syndrome: Jason develops this immediately after being upgraded from woodcutter to hero.
 * Damsel in Distress: Rubis and Sapphrina are first encountered as slaves. Queen Raella does a turn at this in Royal Chaos
 * Deadpan Snarker: Mercury Boltblaster chiefly, but Jason gets in a few of his own.
 * Evil Costume Switch: Raella gets one of these after her Heel Face Turn in Royal Chaos.
 * Farm Boy: Jason, until adventure comes calling.
 * Genre Savvy: Mercury again, he understands the laws of narrative which govern his universe perfectly.
 * Go-Go Enslavement: Rubis and Sapphrina are purchased for this purpose. We never learn exactly what their owner wanted them to do - but are assured that it was disgusting.
 * Heel Face Turn: Natalia Slash in Jason Cosmo, Queen Raella in Royal Chaos.
 * Stock Characters: Lots.
 * Barbarian Tribe
 * Bounty Hunter: make that 'hunters' chief among them being Natalia Slash, the Red Huntsman and Blackmoon.
 * The Caligula: King Halogen, Raella's somewhat insistent suitor.
 * The Casanova: Rifkin in the second book.
 * Con Man: Rifkin again.
 * Cosmic Plaything: Jason. He get used to it.
 * Dark Messiah: Erimandras, Overmaster of the Dark Magic Society
 * The High Queen: Raella
 * Master Swordsman: Or in this case woman, Natalia Slash. Jason doesn't count because Overwhelm does the fighting for him.
 * Ms. Fanservice: A double dose. Rubis and Sapphrina never seem to have heard of modesty - or pneumonia.
 * The Messiah: Jason again.