The Simpsons (animation)/WMG

The Simpsons Movie, as well as the Christmas Episode "Holidays of Future Passed are the true series finales.
In the movie Homer messes up big time to the point where he almost destroys Springfield, the town wants him dead, Bart finds a new father figure, and Marge tapes over their wedding video. In the end, he saves the day, Bart and Homer finally bond, Homer learns that other people are more important than him, a minor character is Killed Off for Real, and Lisa meets her first real boyfriend so far. Unlike other future episodes, Holiday of Future Passed isn't told by a fortune teller or a look into the future. The main plot is set up by Bart and Lisa whining about having to get their Christmas pictures taken, then fast forward. Unlike other flashfowards, this one seems to be canon.
 * Like Spongebob SquarePants's Big Damn Movie, no matter how many episodes continue to get made, these are the true finales.

A second movie will be made after the show finally ends to give the series one, big, final sendoff.
And it will be the only thing that could possibly make sense: Sideshow Bob joins with and/or tricks Mr. Burns in aiding him in assembling a group of people who the Simpson Family has made enemies of.
 * Frank Grimes Jr.! Russ Cargill! The unibrow baby! And, in the final act, Kang and Kodos!

Marge and Homer could be siblings.
When Marge's mother and Homer's father met in an episode, their attraction is immediate and they start dating, as if they not only knew each other but had a romantic history. This means Marge and Homer could be half-siblings.. which explains the family's yellow skin and numerous cracks about their family inbreeding.
 * Then how do you explain every one in Springfield, and the entire world (except people of non-Caucasian origin) being yellow-skinned (ironically the Asians, once derogatorily referred to as 'yellow people', are white)?

The Simpsons and the town of Springfield are sentient, computer-created simulations involved in a "Dark City" experiment
The Simpsons and their fellow Springfieldians think they are regular people living in a regular town, but in reality they are computer simulations being run by a bored group of aliens in a Dark City type of simulation. The reason why Status Quo is God is because they usually set back events, memories, and the progression of time at the end of each "arc" (represented as episodes). Just for kicks, though, they'll often leave some hint or memory of what came before, enough for that memory to have an effect on the personality of the character, but not enough for them to put two-and-two together. That's why their personalities tend towards Flanderization over time - the repeated simulations are reinforcing certain traits, until


 * Lisa the smart schoolgirl becomes a tree-hugging, vegetarian liberal,
 * Bart the troublemaker and slow kid becomes a prankster of legendary and ludicrous capabilities,
 * Homer the slightly stupid but generally sympathetic working-class protagonist becomes incredibly childish and awful,

among others.

Nelson Muntz is a Powerful Psychic
Or at least a powerful telepath. His influence covers the entire town. This is how he's able to laugh at the misfortune of other people he can't even see, and call them on the phone so they can hear him laugh. One episode even has him Astral Projecting! The only things holding him back from making good use of his power are his crippling Parental Abandonment Issues and his being a card-carrying bully.
 * He can even dominate the minds of others over long distances to judging by "Homerpalooza"
 * He also once beat up a ghost. While the commentary talks about the power of Nelson

The episode "Time and Punishment" is canon
At the end, our original Homer is in a timeline where literally everyone had lizard tongues. Poor Homer FROM that timeline wound up in the original timeline- we've now been watching the false Lizard-Tongue Homer and his own crazy escapades many seasons later... This is further supported by the movie when he grabs a shrimp out of the grill with his own long tongue! Makes total sense yet?
 * What about when Mr Burns was 'trapped' under rocks with the moles and he had to live off insects with his long red tongue in Fraudcast News? Am I the only one who noticed that? or is that just me?

Springfield and everything associated with it is a fantasy world created by Haruhi Suzumiya.
Think about it. It would explain so many things. Nobody seems to know what state it's in. There's the constant Flanderization and idiocy of so many of its residents. Most of them are yellow, and all of them have four fingers. The Status Quo Is God. The whole messy Separate Simpsons Geography Thing.
 * Why Haruhi Suzumiya in particular?
 * 1) She's exactly the sort of person who would do such a thing.
 * 2) Why the hell not?
 * Springfield's universe might be a universe she discarded before arriving at her current one, which she was subconsciously kind enough to leave intact. Well, as intact as it gets, anyway.
 * She's Flanders. There's no other person she could be.
 * Look below.

We see Springfield through the eyes of Maggie Simpson

 * The residents do not get old. Why would a toddler should have a sense of time?
 * Why would a toddler care about living in a specific state?
 * The Flanderization is Maggie recognizing patterns in behavior.
 * While Maggie is a smart child, her near-superhuman portrayal of her as a genius is... well, not very modest.
 * She has a little sister's hero-worship of her sister; when she was declared more intelligent than Lisa, she almost immediately retconned it.
 * Every important event focuses round the Simpson family. Because it should.
 * Matt Groening has said that Marge's hair represents a small child's perspective of a normal hairstyle.
 * The art gets more refined every year because her eyesight is improving as the months go by.
 * It would be an Ugly Cute, funny, exaggerated version of the world anyway.
 * The Halloween episodes are when she's having nightmares.

Bart and Lisa are at the centre of a Status Quo Is God effect
Okay, this takes a fair bit of explaining.

Bart and Lisa are at the centre of a Status Quo Is God phenomenon, which explains why Status Quo Is God in this show. The rest of the cast is affected to a degree directly proportionate to how often they interact with Bart or Lisa, with twice the effect for any incident if it's with both at the same time.

Homer, for example, spends a large amount of time in proximity to Bart and Lisa both and interacts with them on a far greater scale than anyone else in the series; thus, nearly EVERYTHING that happens to him is neatly resolved at the end of the episode or snapped back by the next one. Sideshow Bob spends very little time near them, as he's in prison most of the time for trying to kill Bart; when he IS trying to kill Bart, he seems to be prone to the same kind of mistakes each time (that is, letting his ego get in the way).

Apu has just enough contact with Bart and Lisa to be a recurrer, but little more. When he interacts with them, the status quo is restored promptly (such as the episode where he gets fired from the Kwik-E-Mart). But the longer he stays away from them, the more his personal story develops: he gets married, has octuplets, etc etc... and at least some of this is Take Our Word for It.


 * Makes sense. Maude Flanders had less contact with them than her family and she eventually died for reals. Frank Grimes had no contact with them and didn't even survive past the end of his 1st episode.
 * Also, Selma has an adopted daughter. We barely see her or have her mentioned. This could be because she semi-frequently visits the Simpsons, and thus her adoption is retgoned most of the time.


 * Bart and Lisa are cosmic horrors warping reality to get a status quo effect.


 * Maggie is still a baby when Apu's children are fighting to go to toddler preschool and she's tecknically younger than them..

The Simpsons is a Future Imperfect or otherwise unreliable retelling of Family Guy
...because it would be the ultimate subversion of It's Been Done.

Milhouse's mother Luanne is his father Kirk's dopplerganger from Shelbyville
She mentions she was born in Shelbyville, and several other characters had counterparts.

Lisa became a Buddhist because Richard Gere, a famous celebrity, did
She didn't need to convert to another religion; she only had to change to another church or parish. Lisa is prone to jump on trendy intellectual bandwagons - think how she embraced vegetarianism - and it's no stretch to assume she became a Buddhist because it was a trend among the Hollywood elite prior to Scientology.
 * She wouldn't go for Scientology because she probably accesses 4chan. A lot.
 * I feel the need to note Lisa became a vegetarian because eating animals (and dissecting them) became disturbing to her. The fact she was shunned by pretty much everyone shows she didn't do it because it was trendy.
 * If there's any subgroup more hated than vegetarians, it's children more intelligent than the average adult. Bear in mind, when reading these sorts of comments.

An ancient prophecy states that Rupert Murdoch's media empire will only last as long as The Simpsons keeps airing new episodes
This explains the show's unprecedented longevity on a network with a cancel-happy reputation.
 * Oh God, it's the Winchester Mansion of television shows!

The secret to The Simpsons' longevity involves Matt Groening selling his soul and Al Jean and Mike Scully sabotaging their own show and the competition
After season four, Matt Groening was facing a crisis: his best writers were leaving due to exhaustion, the show was at the height of its popularity, and there was a line of Dueling Shows waiting to replace The Simpsons as the edgy sitcom that dares to reflect life's foibles with loving satire. Rather than call it quits and cancel the show like a sane person, Groening took a page from Saturday Night Live and decided to make it better with new writers, not accounting for the fact that this practice doesn't always garner great results. Distraught over how cartoony and surreal the show was turning out, Groening planned to end the show and attempt suicide after completion of the season five finale "Secrets to a Successful Marriage" (the episode where Homer gets thrown out of the house for telling Marge's secrets during a "How to Fix Your Marriage" class at the local Learning Annex), but stopped when Mike Scully and Al Jean offered to help Matt fix the show -- for a price. This led to episodes featuring plots normally found in wacky Saturday morning cartoons or sappy, traditional sitcoms -- the only things making them Simpson-esque are the pop culture references and the characters. Groening was too whacked out on antidepressants to care, which is why he never intervened. He did protest over that Crossover episode with Jay Sherman from The Critic, but he was force-fed more antidepressants and blacked out before any action could be taken.

By the time season eight rolled around, Mike Scully and Al Jean were having too much fun warping The Simpsons and hired Bill Oakley and Josh Weinsten to create the episode "The Itchy, Scratchy, and Poochie Show" as a "Screw You" to fans who loved the show's early years (even though seasons one and two were wretched--in both animation and writing, so the fans * really* need to take off the rose-colored glasses when waxing nostalgic about The Simpsons's early years). Matt Groening confronted Jean and Scully about the episode, but Jean and Scully took care of the upcoming conflict by giving Matt loads and loads of money and decided, "What the hell? Plenty more fans where that come from."

This was not to last, though. Following the creation and airing of "The Principal and the Pauper" (the episode where ), Groening realized that he had sold his soul and left the show in disgrace (his final wish was to have his names in the Executive Producer so no one would know that he had left). After a year of trying to find himself, Groening teamed up with David X. Cohen (who was also screwed over by Jean and Scully for suggesting to revert The Simpsons back to the way it was in season 3 -- somewhat like a sappy family sitcom, but with enough sarcasm to keep the treacle from sticking and poke fun at how cornball family sitcom conventions can be) and together, the two went to work on creating Futurama.

Angry that Groening reneged on their deal (and took a fellow writer with him), Jean and Scully decided to sabotage the show so Matt Groening can get blamed for the show's sorry state. Things got worse when Phil Hartman (the man who voiced crooked lawyer Lionel Hutz and washed-up, alcoholic,  B-movie actor Troy McClure) died at the hands of his wife -- now Jean and Scully had no hook to get the more jaded viewers to watch the show. To make matters worse, Jean and Scully hired old college friends, drinking buddies, and their own family members as writers, who may be fans of the show, but wouldn't know how to write an episode if someone held them at gunpoint and forced them, so in a desperate bid to keep The Simpsons on the air (especially around the time that a batch of Dueling Shows were airing on network TV and cable), Jean and Scully pulled every trick in the book to get people to watch the show -- celebrity guests that added nothing to the plot, wackier stories, a Very Special Episode where someone important dies.

When that served only to drive more viewers away (leaving behind only but the truly braindead/heavily medicated/rabid fans who couldn't tell a good episode from a bad one), Jean and Scully called upon the studio janitor (who practices voodoo in his spare time) to create dolls symbolizing all the shows that threatened to take the place of The Simpsons and regularly stuck needles in them whenever Jean and/or Scully read a scathing review about this week's episode of The Simpsons being a steaming pile and declaring that an hour of The Weather Channel would make for better, smarter viewing. A lot of the Dueling Shows, like Mission Hill, The Oblongs, Baby Blues, King of the Hill, and Sit Down Shut Up were easily defeated, but the ones like South Park, Family Guy, Futurama, Cartoon Network's Adult Swim line-up, and American Dad proved to be harder to defeat and sticking needles in them only got the shows temporarily canceled (cf. Futurama and American Dad) or gave them temporary-to-severe Seasonal Rot (cf. Family Guy, South Park, some of the shows on Adult Swim that weren't cancelled after one or two seasons).

When that failed, Jean and Scully simply bribed people to praise the show and favor it over other superior shows such as Mystery Science Theater 3000 and Battlestar Galactica and created The Simpsons Movie in a feeble attempt at staying culturally relevant. Sadly, it worked well enough for The Simpsons to stay on the air longer. To this day, Jean and Scully continue to curse good animated shows and use their janitor's magic to keep the Simpsons on the air as a Franchise Zombie, but with the tepid reviews from season 21's "Judge Me Tender," the magic may be fading.
 * This is freaking brilliant.

Springfield is in a parallel universe
Why else do you think we can never find it?

Homer has powers of similar magnitude to Haruhi Suzumiya
Like all the other Haruhi Suzumiya WMGs on this page, it explains the Status Quo Is God and all of Homer's abilities.

Homer may or may not realize that he has these powers. If not, his powers are whimsical. If he DOES know, then he is playing with everyone and generally using Obfuscating Stupidity. Think about it: all of the times he has died and come back to life, his vast number of jobs, his whimsical abilities, his constantly losing money, the number of things that have no longer taken place as soon as he forgets about them, and his losing and regaining his job so often. Several times, he has changed the past to accommodate himself (the barbershop quartet, the grunge band, his and Marge's several first meetings...).

Bart and Lisa may or may not have powers. Maggie, in accordance to the WMG above, may have inherited his powers and become Haruhi Suzumiya.

Also take note that the person he married is one of the most normal people in the show, aside from any abilities he may have given her. Marge could be Homer's Kyon. The Treehouse of Horror segments could be Homer or Maggie's stress relievers where they kill themselves and anybody else that annoys them.

Also, Springfield is nearly permanently enclosed in Closed Space. The surroundings vary by state, proximity to the ocean, desert, forests and mountains depending on how Homer feels. As a side note, Homer's way of instantly traveling is to say "Well, here we are at the...!"

Ralph Wiggum had a severe mental injury
Because he wasn't always that stupid.

Ralph Wiggum is a complete idiot because he is part pig
Word of Dante has said that Chief Wiggum is 'from the shallow end of the gene pool', explaining his pig-like nose, and that of his wife. Ralph inherited both the nose and the shallowness.
 * Alternatively, Chief Wiggum and his wife are too much physically similar. Incest?

Homer is aware of the show's Status Quo Is God / Negative Continuity issues and uses it to his advantage
This is why he lives so far beyond his means: he knows that by next week it won't matter.
 * Awesome!
 * Also a play on how people will do this in real life (credit card debt, etc), and sometimes, sometimes, get away with it.

Homer Simpson is in his own Truman Show
And he's gone insane from decades of it. This is why Homer can get away with anything. His entire reality is geared around keeping him safe and the status quo the same. Maude Flanders cracked under the pressure and left years ago. And this is why Marge keeps returning to him; her real relatives need the money.
 * One of the comic stories did have TV producers setting up a Truman Show around Homer. It ended once he found out and agreed to keep it going - and tried to be funny, which ended up backfiring horribly.

Noah from the episode "Father Knows Worst" is a young Noah
Someone has to say it. And they're both smart.

"Behind The Laughter" provides an in-universe explanation for everything
The show declining in quality over the years? That's Homer's Executive Meddling. Flanders becoming increasingly unlikable? Homer doesn't like the real guy who he's based on, so he made him less sympathetic. The characters never aging? Gary Coleman syndrome: they're a lot older than they appear.
 * "How could I get all three required drops of [anti-growth hormone] into her cereal?" Answer: he wouldn't; he spiked the water supply.

Bart practices Obfuscating Stupidity
Whenever he's tasked with something other than school work, he tends to show intelligence and aptitude. But the minute he's in a school setting, he's shown to be a straight F student, dumber than a sack of hammers. Bart just hates school, and it's easier for him to get away with his behaviour if everyone thinks he's stupid, when in fact he simply can't be bothered with it.
 * Canon: there's a difference between "stupid" and "underachiever". Hmmm...wasn't it the line "Underachiever and Proud of It" which provoked Bush père into making the show a Moral Guardian target, albeit not quite in such a Windmill Crusader fashion as Quayle's attack on Murphy Brown?
 * Lisa "proved" Bart is less intelligent than a hamster. Does it matter, though, whether this happened before or after the show Jumped the Shark?

Each season of The Simpsons exists in a parallel universe, completely separate from one another.
This would explain why time never passes, no matter how long the show has been on and no matter how much time passes during each individual episode. There have been over 400 episodes to date, and yet the characters never age. Even if each episode represented one day, at least one year should have passed in their timeline; and the episode with the Itchy and Scratchy movie spans about eight months.

Also, this theory would explain the contradictory origins of each of the characters, such as the numerous accounts of how Homer and Marge met, whether they met during the 1970s, 1980s, or 1990s. And then there's the matter of why Homer is stupid - whether it's because of a gene that makes all male Simpsons become stupid as they get older, or if Homer was once a genius and a crayon that he shoved up his nose as a child made him stupid.

Each season is its own timeline, excepting Seasons 6 and 7, which are directly connected by a two-part episode and so are only one timeline. Any time an episode references events from an earlier season, they acknowledge those events as happening in Broad Strokes. When Homer asks, "Marge, what were your gambling debts last year?" he is referencing a gambling problem that Marge had; but in the reality of that episode, it might have been dealt with differently, and the characters would have been one year younger.
 * A larger theory of this would be the first ten seasons are a different Springfield, sort of like Earths 1 and 2.
 * Alternatively, each time an episode contradicts a previous episode we start viewing a new Springfield that doesn't have the contradicted episode in its continuity.

Time passes in a different way, and people don't get older that easily on Simpsons.
They're probably living on a time where years aren't really that much compared to days, and thus, a school "year" could take a while to pass; also, they probably live a lifespan of 300~350 of our years, explaining how they don't get old. Any references to age told by them were according to our notion of years, and vague idea of apparent age in characters; Abe Simpson might look 80 years old, but he's probably around 275 of our years.

Principal Skinner's Freudian Slip about "his beloved smother" represented his deep seated desire to kill her
He wasn't saying it because she was smothering him, he was saying it because he wants to smother her.
 * Pretty much proven in the episode where Brad Goodman, the pop psychologist, visits Springfield. When asked to confront a stuffed doll stand-in of his mother, Principal Skinner ends up beating the tar out of it.
 * Skinner didn't just beat the doll up. Just before Goodman interrupted him, he was busy ripping the doll's stuffing out with his teeth.
 * And in the episode were Lisa enters the Sundance movie festival we learn Skinner has written a screen play called "killing Seymor's mother".
 * Don't forget the carnival game when she nags him about failing and he starts trying to win the knife.

Celebrity Guest Stars show up in Springfield due to it being in another universe
One thing that supports this is that no one knows where Springfield is in the USA, Springfield (and surrounding towns) is in a parallel universe and celebrities are somehow zapped through a wormhole or a tear in reality and become yellow with 4 finger and forget everything from their universe after leaving Springfield, they just lose their memories of what just happened when they come back.

The series The Simpsons is attempting to bring about the end of the world.
In a few years, the show will have used 30-40% of all celebrities in existence. On December 12, 2012, an episode will air featuring Summer Glau, Drew Carey and Kevin Bacon. This will cause the Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon to compress and eventually collapse in on itself, taking the rest of the world with it.
 * Or Homer will reveal that he was a sparkling vampire that used a really strong sunscreen to not sparkle, all the time. Or both.
 * As an oblique reference to this, the writers decided to name the detergent "Mr. Sparkle".

Nelson Muntz grew up, built a time machine, and came back as Barney Gumble.
Just look at the two next to each other; the resemblance is uncanny.
 * Alternatively, Barney Gumble is Muntz' real father and no one (including both of them) knows or even suspects it.
 * Jossed, Mr. Muntz made an appearance in last season.
 * Maybe that wasn't the real Mr. Muntz. It could have just been a drunk hobo who was extremely suggestible. There's no proof that their related except for his backstory that could have easily been fabricated.
 * Barney was shown to be a sperm donor in an early episode, with several women having kids resembling him.

"Eddie" and "Lou" are titles, not names
I got the idea from this quote: "Wiggum: And Eddie, you're promoted to Lou.

Eddie: Nice. And, uh, who's gonna be Eddie?

Wiggum: We don't need an Eddie."

Superdude the gerbil really shot Mr. Burns.
Don't believe me? Open your eyes to the truth!
 * Or, Superdude set the wheels of motion of Mr. Burns being shot by being a ''Magnificent Bastard'

The entire series exists in a warped reality.
The earliest sign? During the episode where Bart becomes a scout he points out the inaccurate tenting technique used in an Itchy and Scratchy episode, where Lisa points out that cartoons don't have to be realistic. At which point Homer walks by the living room window even though he's sitting behind them on the couch. This is how we know that no matter what happens in continuity, it won't be constant! The Simpsons live in a world were physics do not exist!

The entire city of Springfield changes its location every week.
It has the power to travel to any place in the USA, much like the mansion in Popotan can in Japan. Also, like in Popotan, the residents never age. The only major difference is that it doesn't jump forward in time when it moves.

The city of Springfield was built by Bloody Stupid Johnson.
This explains the rapidly shifting geography and impossibility to locate.

An Eldritch Abomination has taken root in Springfield.
This thing also has reality warping abilities that prevent time from moving forward as part of its goals. Only time is moving forward at the same time it isn't. This is what allows Springfielders to acknowledge past events despite never aging. The mass Flanderization is a side effect of people reliving existence continuously while moving forward. The one thing it has problems dealing with is death, thus why dead characters tend to remain dead.

Lisa is actually Al Gore
Environmental obsession, everyone?

Springfield is a Traction City
This would answer the the age-old question: Why is Springfield a coastal city one day and landlocked the next? Simple: between the episodes, the citizens simply put the city on wheels and move to another location. The reason being time in the past, the Mayor of Springfield (possibly as a misinterpretation of orders during the Vietnam War) literally mobilized the city. However, instead of practicing Municipal Darwinism, they simply go along trading with the locals.

The reason no one ever ages in this (or almost every cartoon) is due to cartoons living in an alternate universe
We'll use the Springfield Universe in this case. One Springfieldian year (as in 1 year for their species, like dog years) is MUCH longer than ours (as far as I can tell it's over 20 years), but 1 calendar year is still 365 days. That is why Abe and Mr. Burns are both WWI and WWII Vets when the last WWI Vet is almost dead (if not already).

Homer Dies All The Time Ever
Whenever some event happens that should logically result in Homer's death, he does in fact die, and the rest of the episode takes place in a new reality created by his brain, which he is then brought back to life in. Because Homer would have remained dead in the time it takes his brain to create a new reality, brain cells start dying, making him stupider. Every continuity error or instance of Flanderization, is a result of Homer's decaying mind not able to completely recreate the previous reality. The series will end when the last of his brain cells finally die.
 * That would explain how someone as stupid as Homer could be a nuclear engineer- he used to be smart (even with the crayon in his brain).
 * Alternatively: Homer is suffering the same fate as the Bikura on Hyperion - at some point he ran across the Shrike which implanted a cruciform in him which guaranteed a sort of immortality and, like the Bikura, each regeneration diminishes his intelligence

Homer is a literal example of quantum immortality
Every time Homer does something stupid that should result in his death or maiming the show switches to an alternate reality where he somehow survives. With time Homer, who started off with sub-par intelligence, comes to ignore everyone around him who warns him about danger because they've been wrong literally every time in the past. Hence his Flanderization as the series has progressed.

With some adjustments this could explain why there's so little change in the town and why all the characters become more and more extremely caricatured with time - the idea behind quantum suicide is applied not just to death but also to major negative consequences to all actions for most of the towns inhabitants most of the time. Because none of the towns natives ever suffer any real negative reinforcement due to their actions they never learn to termper their behaviour to make themselves more acceptable to the world at large.

Homer really did sleep with Mindy, he just imagined she was Marge
"Marge" is wearing the exact same dress and it's in the exact same hotel room. Homer just imagines she was Marge to relive his guilt.

Kirk and Luanne Van Houten (Milhouse's parents) are first cousins about a dozen generations removed.
Anyone can see that they look almost identical, even without eyeglasses. Plus, it's been established that Luanne was born in Shelbyville, and Shelbyville was established by a settler partner of Jebediah Springfield's who wanted to legalize incest. The Van Houtens are one of the original Shelbyville settler families who later repudiated incest; they consciously split the family up in about 1890, with different relatives relocating to different communities, so they wouldn't be tempted to "experiment" anymore. Kirk's great-grandparents moved to Springfield and renamed themselves "Van Houten"; they never told any of their descendants about their shameful past, which is why Kirk believes that he and his wife have roots in separate towns. The fact that Luanne looks so much like him never made him suspicious because Kirk is mildly mentally retarded and as a child was told by his mother that "every boy wants a girl who reminds him of his mother" - and Kirk took it literally.
 * In a new episode someone taunts Bart and Lisa for bickering like they are together, and both of them act appropriatly disgusted, in Lisa's words "He's my brother!". But Milhouse then says "But I thought my parents were siblings?". Bart once asked them if they were related but they denied it.
 * I don't think that Shelbyville was founded by a guy who was ACTUALLY an incest advocate, just that Grandpa was telling the story, and he was biased towards Springfield. If you watch the episode, a lot of things he said about Shelbyville were very odd, ever for The Simpsons Universe. That said, I agree with you that Milhouse's parents actually are closely related.

Abe and Mona Simpson were already related before marriage.
Similar to the previous WMG. This is the only way to fit 'The Color Yellow' into the (admittedly feeble) continuity. Abe was descended from Virgil and Mabel, while Mona was descended from Eliza's part of the family after Hiram remarried.

Lester and Eliza are descended from Eliza Simpson.
This explains why they look so much like Bart and Lisa. Presumably, their entire family consists of Simpsons lookalikes.

Springfield exists on a floating continent somewhere above the U.S.
Take into mind that such contains not only Springfield, but at least Shelbyville and Capitol City as well. It's obviously a large enough landmass that it can have its own highways, airports, and so forth, but small enough that the garbage of other cities can cause the end of "Trash of the Titans" - incidentally, a part of the continent must be uninhabitable due to it. It stays high enough that it can appear to border Nevada, Ohio, Maine, and Kentucky from the vantage point of the highest mountains, but can come low enough to enable the Simpsons rapid transit via car or train to places like New York or Florida. Incidentally, in-universe people don't seem to care, have become used to it, or perhaps convince themselves that Springfield doesn't actually exist.

Bart is strawberry blond.
In one episode he has been shown to have natural red hair. He said he dyed it blond. Even when he was little it was blond. So he probably has very dark strawberry blond. Ignore the impossibilities of this theory. The Simpsons isn't sensible.

The show was originally supposed to take place during The 60s.
The early Tracey Ullman shorts seem kind of... retro, even for the 80s. In some shorts, their TV looks like it was made in the 50s, and it comes complete with a rabbit-ears antenna. Matt Groening has said that Marge's hair was inspired by the "beehive" hairstyle that was popular at the time. It could be possible that the entire show began as a nostalgic look at Matt's childhood.

Homer died 6 months after "Homer the Heretic" and went to Purgatory
God states at the end of the episode that Homer will die in six months, and he did. Everything that has occurred in the series since then has been a chance to improve himself enough to qualify for Heaven. This is why nothing really changes and no-one grows up, and why the show has been on for so long - as close as he gets, he's still not cleaned up his act.
 * Alternatively,that's the punishment in Purgatory.Homer has to experience his inner demons,which is what the show became.Once The Simpsons is finally canceled, Homer will have completed his punishment and ascend to Heaven.

Hans Moleman is a Promethean.
Everyone hates him for no reason whatsoever, he's rather hideous (so that just rules out Galateans), and he's literally died and come back to life several times.

Ralph Wiggum is smarter than he appears.
In fact, he's above-average in intelligence. One episode, where he was a presidential candidate (don't ask) and the left- and right-wings were hounding him to be on their side, Lisa tries to comfort him. She said that he shouldn't let them use him. Ralph says, "well maybe I want to use them." He then tells her (in a childish way) how he would improve the country. If the comics are to be believe (and they're probably not), Ralph was shown to have an eidetic memory. Lisa took advantage of this and helped him get a B+ on a history test. (He would've gotten a better mark if he didn't write about Lincoln's head melting.) Perhaps he is smart, but lacks the confidence to display it.

Homer is Obfuscating Stupidity.
He never had Moe put the crayon back in his brain - he worried that he would have died and left his family in despair. This would account for several outbursts of higher intelligence (such as having a high grasp on the concept of a think tank, sarcastically pointing out little-known facts about European history); his masquerade is slipping. == "Miracle on Evergreen Terrace" is the final episode out of order. == Somebody (I forget who) made this suggestion on the DVD commentary for the episode.

They are all suffering from jaundice.

 * And this proves it.
 * That video also proves that Homer is Bill from King of the Hill's twin.
 * Futurama proves that a strain of body-encompassing jaundice does indeed exist, and The Simpsons is simply placed in a world where everyone suffers from it.

Homer's Flanderization is the result of head injury.
When Homer crashed down the Springfield Chasm, he suffered brain damage that is causing him to be more of a Jerkass, and more injuries make him even less intelligent. Marge puts up with him because he's become mentally ill, which is why he gets away with a lot

There is little to no continuity due to time travel.
Professor Frink has already invented a time machine, and his messing around leads to Flanderization and no continuity. This is also why Springfield can't be found; Frink's time-traveling is changing where Jebediah settled in America
 * Not just that, but he's basically screwed over the time stream. That's why no-one ages, even if a measurable amount of time passes. The rest of the planet, (asides from Shelbyville), is unaffected for the most part. Due to the Timey-Wimey Ball, they retain some memories of previous episodes.

Springfield is trapped in a Time Loop.
We know it isn't as simple as Negative Continuity, because they refer to previous events. The reason for this is because Springfield(and Shelbyville) is stuck in a time loop, where every year it resets at most two years. However, there's a certain extent of Ripple Effect Proof Memory, so each version of the year is different from the last. Certain events, such as Maude's death, are constants that can't be negated. Different origin stories are the result of conflicting memories, which causes Flanderization. The rest of the planet is immune from this, hence why it hasn't stayed 1987. This is likely due to the above theory of Frink messing around with time travel, creating the Time Loop. Certain individuals such as Sideshow Bob and Frank Grimes are constants who cannot be altered. Certain events are also resistant against this, such as Milhouse's parents divorcing. The Simpsons family is inherently tied to this.

Mr Burns is undead.
In the early seasons, he seemed pretty normal for his age. But now,he's a pathetically weak old man, incapable of simple tasks. The reasons for this is simple-Mr Burns isn't actually alive. At some point, he ended up dying, but he made a Deal With the Devil so he'd stay alive. The result is a body only able to function due to the powers of Satan. Any character incosistencies are the result of having a dead brain. The reason Burns harvests organs is to find a way of being truly alive.

Maggie grows up to be a either a Little Miss Badass or an Badass Normal superheroine
Already she has shown proficiency with firearms, and she is barely past one, She easily knocked Homer out with a mallet, and you know how hard it is to take down Homer, and multiple times she awesomely saved members of her family from trouble. so imagine Maggie as a teenager or as an adult.

Some day in the future, The Simpsons will be the longest running TV series in human history
Well ... does anybody doubt it?
 * Sesame Street would have to be canceled first; they've been going for over 40 seasons.
 * As would Doctor Who. Including both the old and the new series they've done 31 seasons, and they're about to start the 32nd.
 * If we're including all genres and all timeslots, we'd have to get rid of The Tonight Show too, and then The Simpsons would have to last another 35 years, which is still over twice how long it's been on now. Good luck.

Moleman is Kenny McCormick's grandfather of Kenny in about 60/70 years
This would explain how many times he's died

The show's seemingly never-ending run is really Springtime for Hitler by Matt Groening.
Think about it: by the time Season 9 was coming to a close, Groening decided he had enough. He felt the show had a nice run and that it was time to move on. Unfortunately, the show was still a cash cow and Groening knew damn well that the cash-mongering executives at FOX wouldn't can the show just yet. So what better way to abandon your fanbase than to make your show Jump the Shark? Going into season 10, Groening did everything he could to make the show as bad as possible (the jerkassination of Homer, Flanderization, crappy jokes, the works). This plan would've worked...if the show still didn't get substantial ratings. Groening now suffers the consequences and has been forced to create 10+ seasons (and counting!) ever since, thanks to Fox. When will Groening's ingenious plan finally work? Only time will tell...
 * Not unprecedented; Springtime For Hitler was a hit.

Randall from Recess is Moe Syzslak as a child.
His status carried on through his childhood and he eventually decided to open a bar.

A future Treehouse of Horror episode will feature a Soul Eater parody.
Okay, the likelyhood is very low, but how kickass would that be?

Homer really did die in the episode Mother Simpson
he did really get chopped to pieces, and the rest of the series is bedtime stories told to Bart and Lisa's children, yup the movie as well

Illiterate trolls are sabotaging this page
no im not,i now they got marred i ws there in the church,anway ill be getting space bar for ChristMas

The Simpsons takes place in The Sims 1 universe
That's why they never age, and why Homer can quit and get his job back so easily.

Nelson and Lisa Simpson still have feelings for each other, or in the future will have a romance.
Nelson always shows his "good side" when with Lisa, and the new episode Loan-a-Lisa they hold hands (for *support*) and rollerskate together. Their past relationship is one of the few things referanced often. Some of the writers have admitted to liking the pairing as well.

Homer is a pyrokinetic, and doesn't know it.
Remember that episode where he somehow sets breakfast cereal on fire? Or that episode where he lightly strokes a christmas tree and it bursts into flames? Or that episode where he and a bunch of his drunk buddies drive carelessly in his car in the school, causing a soccer goal to explode for no apparent reason? Rule of funny aside, this is the best possible explaination.

Krusty married Princess Penelope.
He mentioned being married in the newest season. Why not?

Grandpa Simpson was making up the story of the Simpsons being decendants of black people.
He just made all that up to make Lisa feel better. Seriously, he even says so himself that most of his stories are total bull. He's a dodering, senile old man.

The Simpson's are not related to Virgil at all.
The only reason Grandpa brought it up is because Lisa was upset. Along with the fact that it wasn't written in the cookbook with the other story about Eliza and Virgil, and that Homer looks just like Hiram, and it was just said by Grandpa to cheer up his granddaughter.
 * That's what the WMG above you says.

The A Plot of "Flaming Moe" was partially based on my Fanfic Day Under The Sun
Plot gets kicked off by Mr. Burns and Smithers having some sort of squabble? Check. Smithers gets Moe to help him get what he wants from Mr. Burns? Check. Moe/Smithers Ship Tease despite Moe being fully aware that he is straight due to feeling down? Checkity check. I wrote it two seasons ago, plenty of time for them to find it.
 * I wrote a fanfic in which the Simpsons were walking to a mall. They stole my idea too!

Springfield technically has a one child policy
Except that you're allowed to apply for an exemption. The pattern of acceptance for such means it's more like a 'Stop having kids once you get a healthy girl' policy. Hence:


 * Sheri And Terri are only children because they're both girls and at least one of them is healthy.
 * The Octuplets aren't getting any more siblings (whether their parents want them to or not) because they're not all boys and at least one girl is healthy.
 * The Flanders got their first boy, applied for permission to have a second child. When that child was another boy, they decided God didn't want them to have a daughter and gave up.
 * The Simpsons' first child (Bart) was a boy. Their second child was sickly at birth (Lisa) hence why their application to have a third child (Maggie) was granted. Lisa got better, but after they were given permission to have Maggie.
 * Lots of parents seem to have older sisters so this policy was introduced shortly before Bart et al's generation.
 * Cletus is a special case. He gets away with it under the 'Cultural Exemption Act' i.e. he's treated as a 'farmer' in relation to the real China's policy for equality reasons.
 * Except Bart, Lisa and Maggie were all accidents. And Lisa seemed healthy when we saw her as a bably/toddler.

The Simpsons is in the same universe as St. Elsewhere, Cheers, Frasier, and Wings.
Why, because Homer walked into a bar that had the cast of Cheers in it. The rest were in crossovers with Cheers.
 * Except that Sideshow Bob is voiced by Kelsey Grammer (Frasier), Cecil Terwilliger is voiced by David Hyde Pierce (Niles) and the Terwilliger father is voiced by John Mahoney (Martin Crane).
 * I don't think that would matter in a world populated by dozens of characters using the same ten or so actors over and over again.

Milhouse is in love with Bart.
We know that Milhouse has been madly infatuated with Lisa for years on the show, right? But in Double, Double Boy in Trouble, he falls in love with Bart's fake sister Quenley immediately after he sees her and with nary a thought to Lisa. When Bart points this out, Milhouse confidently answers, "Yeah, but that [with Lisa] was never gonna happen." What's really going on is that Milhouse is actually in love with Bart, but being only a ten year old boy he can't cope with the emotional strain of realising that he's gay (remember how the school psychiatrist had him classified as "flamboyantly homosexual"?) so he transfers his feelings to the nearest thing he can ever have to Bart -- Bart's sister. It doesn't matter who she actually is, Milhouse will always have unrequited feelings for some female relative of his best friend because she represents the person he can never have.
 * B: Do you think my mom is cool? M: No, I think she's HOT! Hmmm... perhaps.

Harry Shearer can criticize The Simpsons because he is too invaluable to replace.
He's the only one on the crew to admit that the show has Jumped the Shark long ago. (Remember, even if people disagree on when, most people think it has.) But because he plays virtually half the male supporting cast, it would not be worth it for Fox and Gracie Films to replace him. They would have to hire at least a dozen more people to replace the voices of all the characters he voices. And they simply cannot kill or otherwise get rid of all of them, or even half of them.
 * Most people think it's jumped the shark, but a chunk of those people think it has recovered since around season 21.

Jasper Beardley is Otto Mann's maternal grandfather
or possibly uncle.

Selma Bouvier only marries characters voiced by recurring guest stars
That's why she married Sideshow Bob (voiced by Kelsey Grammer), Lionel Hutz (voiced by Phil Hartman), Troy Mc Clure (also voiced by Hartman), and Disco Stu (originally voiced by Hartman). Her next husband will either be Fat Tony (voiced by Joe Mantegna) or if she possesses any of her twin sister's lesbian tendencies, Lindsey Naegle or Cookie Kwan (both voiced by Tress Mac Neille.
 * Actually, I just found out that Selma recently married Abraham Simpson (voiced by regular Dan Castellaneta), but since that episode (and the one where she married Disco Stu) took place after the series jumped the shark, those two marriages are non-canon.
 * Whoa! You're right! She does marry Fat Tony in the next episode!

In the episode where Sideshow Bob tries to kill Selma, Homer was in on the plan
The reason for this is because he hated Selma. Who's idea was it to go for a walk when Selma is watching Mcguyver? Homers. The reason Bob needed Homer to say this idea is because if the idea came from someone else, and Marge could witness it, then Bob would look less suspicious for leaving the room at that exact time. When Bart tries to explain that Sideshow Bob is going to kill Selma, Homer doesn't really not understand what Bart is saying, Homer is just stalling for time.

Regarding Krusty is only illiterate when it comes to English
Krusty is illiterate in the first few seasons. His family is Jewish and he probably is bilingual in English and Yiddish or Hebrew. He can speak English but can only read the other language. It's possible his grandparents from Eastern Europe lived with him as a kid and didn't speak English. The cue cards on his show were also in another language. He then didn't learn to read and write English til he was an adult.
 * He probably reads Hebrew or Arabic just fine, based on "Today I am a Clown" since he went through with his Aliyah with nary a hitch, based on the amount of prep he had.

Every Three Seasons of the Simpsons represent one year in Springfield, and all of the characters are actually slightly older than the perspective of the show admits
In Season Three, Bart and Lisa turned 10 and 8 respectively. At that point the show was in its third season. Since there have been 22 seasons, if the show operated on a three season per year timetable, and Bart and Lisa started out as 9 and 7 respectively than at the current time Bart would be 16 and Lisa would be 14. There have been complaints that Lisa's activism and persona don't work if she's still 8, but if she's really 14 her persona may make more sense. As to why there still in a public school run by "Seymour Skinner" Springfield is a terrible town that Houses it's entire public school program within the confines of what was once simply Springfield Elementary back when the Simpson family first welcomed Santa's Little Helper into their midst. All of the direct mentions of age are part of some kind of skewed perspective, exactly who's skewed perspective it is that makes us think Bart is still ten in universe is open to interpretation. But it might be the parents in the family, unwilling to admit their children are growing up. The main problem with this theory is of course Maggie, though of course, the skewed perspective might be at work there too. Perhaps Maggie is actually seven, and Homer and Marge continue to see her as a baby because they won't accept their children gradually growing up. Given Maggie's demonstrated intelligence, I can't think of another explanation for her behavior according to this theory. I'll admit this is a entirely unlikely theory, but if the show may actually be a matter of alternate universes or Truman Show shenanigans, is a show with the false perspective impossible?

Ned and Edna won't stay together.
Seriously, Status Quo Is God. They'll either sabotage the vote or break them up two seasons later.

Bart will get a bear at some point.
Remember 'They'll Never Stop the Simpsons'? "Marge becomes a robot" was sort of done in 'Treehouse of Horror XVI' with cyborg-Bart, "how bout a crazy wedding" happened in 'Rome-old and Juli-eh'... it's only a matter of time before he gets that bear. They keep it locked up so that he wont kill again
 * Didnt Lisa have a bear in 18x2 Jazzy and the Pussycats?
 * Bart already has a bear and it's living in the basement.

The Simpson family are cosmic horrors.
They just have no clue about it. First off is Abraham Simpson, who's Lovecraftian Superpower allows him and Mr Burns to remain the same age during WWII, despite Comic Book Time making them younger and younger during then. Homer Simpson, being his son, is next. He has the capabilities of surviving every injury thrown at him, however this causes stupidity. As mentioned above, Lisa and Bart have a Status Quo Is God effect. All members of the Simpson family have the inherent ability to randomly alter history, at during their lifespans. All Simpsons have this ability, originating from their common Eldritch Abomination ancestor, Jebediah Simpson.

Moe Syzslak is the trapped soul of a dead man, forced to atone for his sins before being allowed passage into the next life.

 * (His visibility to others may be explained by his bizarre ventures into variations of Voodoo.) Think about the extremity of Moe's morality. Either he is a greedy, self-serving, two-faced little rat (Insurance fraud, death threats) or practically Jesus (reading books to sick children and the poor, saving people from burning cars and forests, personally throwing care packages to those in impoverished nations). Clearly, these good deeds are attempts to cleanse his soul with a quicker pace. His presence as a supernatural being would explain his aversion to holy water, and the fact that his countless suicide attempts never work is probably the effect of his inability to die.

There is a subconcius Reality Warper in the simpson family but it's Marge not Homer
I noticed that Marge has a trouble accepting her kids growing up as well as change in general so would subconciously create a world were kids never age and Status Quo Is God and I think the reasons for there being a reality warper in the core family have been stated above.

Marge is a robot
Just humour me here... She is extremely strong, and when she's revealed to be left-handed, you notice how her right hand has slightly above average coordination, while her left is extremely skilled. She rarely (if ever?) is out of breath. She is usually the Only Sane Person, but is occasionally over-organised, for instance her obsession with cleaning before the cleaners arrived. Maybe her suburban existance is Marge in hiding. Hell, she could be an escaped Stepford Wife. Or a forgotten Cylon.

Ralph Wiggum isn't stupid, he just has severe mental health disorders.
Earlier episodes such as This little Wiggy show Ralph as being more strange and immature for his age than stupid, and also imply he has an incredibly overactive imgination and possibly is schizophrenic (he imagined an elf telling him to burn things at one point).

Ralph's increasing stupidity over the seasons isn't to do with Flanderization, its that his mental health is worsening as he grows older, not allowing him to function properly.

A Gypsy cursed Jebadiah Springfield.
I always theorized that sometimes in the past, Jebadiah Springfield (under his original name Hans Sprungfeld the Pirate) must've angered a Gypsy who put him under the curse of "You will be founder of a town of idiots and fools" and so years later he did and this can explain why 90% of Springfield's citizens are total idiots, how Lisa and a handful of others escaped this curse is beyond me.

In the Simpsons universe Whites and Asians places in history where inverted
Hence why the white cast are yellow and the Asian characters look white

Kang and Kodos control Springfield
Kang and Kodos have actually been killing all of the citizens of Springfield and replacing them with clones each year. This explains both why they never age and why they've all turned into shadows of their former selves. The cloning process damages the brain and removes basic personality traits.

Also, each citizen in Springfield is given a false memory (based on the current year and their current age) of their past. That's why ten years ago Homer was in a Barbershop Quartet in the early 80's, but now he was in a grunge band in the 90's.

It was all a social experiment done by a couple of aliens to see how much any one person could grow and develop in a single year. You know that phrase, "If I could do it all over again, I wouldn't change a thing."? They were looking to prove if that were true or not.

Springfield has been moved more than once
In the 200th episode, Springfield is moved building by building due to the trash pile up. It's possible that the town gets moved due to disasters quite often, possibly from state to state. If it's a different state it's one that includes a Shelbyville and Capital City is what they say to the audience to keep us guessing. That also explains why Springfield's geography changes, why it's said to "border" four different states that are geographically far away from each other, why people in Springfield have accents from all over the country, and why new parts of the city such as Little Seattle and the Russian district appear out of nowhere. This explains why some characters' living situations change in some episodes.

The Simpsons is in the same universe as Neon Genesis Evangelion
Proof--This girl is a dead ringer for Rei Ayanami, possibly a spare clone that slipped the net. She's also as talkative as the "real" Rei (that is, she doesn't talk at all). This reader is not sure what the implications of this are, but they are unfortunate.

Homer died from Fugu poisoning, and is in hell.
Homer suffer physical pain constantly, repeatedly makes up with his family only to go right back to the same friction and marital problems, and can never escape the nuclear plant no matter how bizarre or outlandish his career moves are. If anything positive happens to him, it immediately goes sour, and any success he experiences will be erased, bringing him right back to square one. Ned Flanders is the Devil, ironically offering him redemption that he will never seek out.

Lisa is a powerful reality warper who has the whole town under her thumb.
Which explains why all the recent episodes give her the most focus, and she is able to get away with some incredibly dickish things (IE: Million Dollar Abie.)

The entire show is a cartoon done by anime.
Specifically, by Kang and Kodos. The Simpsons is actually their attempt to document and understand human civilization: why is unknown. They've chosen America because, due to it being the richest country, they think it's the planet's capital. They don't consider the location of their documentary or continuity important, so we never find out Where the Hell Is Springfield?. Flanderization is due to Kang and Kodos deciding to change it into a TV show, and they only appear in Halloween episodes because they're non-canon. Futurama is a spin-off series.

Certain episodes aren't canon, and certain are.
To reiterate, here's a guide
 * Any episode refered to in a future episode is likely canon. Any episode important to the Simpsons mythos is definitely canon.
 * Any episode with mention of the year is non-canon. The exception being episodes which are essential to the mythos: in this case, they may be canon, but mention of the year is not.
 * The maximum duration of the canon is about 2 years, based on Maggie being a baby. Any episode where Springfield Elementary is included logically takes place during her 1st year.
 * The series is in a Anachronism Stew.

Dead Bart will be the eventual series finale
Or at least a version of it.

This series takes place about 1000 years ago
See an episode that says humans will get more fingers due to evolution.

The final episode will make it clear we'll never see the Simpsons again
While at the same time making a point of all the many secondary characters Springfield still has to offer for potential new stories. Of course, a spin-off series will follow and receive very mixed reviews.

The next Treehouse of Horror episode will contain a segment that is a Shout Out to Higurashi no Naku Koro Ni.

 * While Homer is in Springfield he notices a murder in Springfield that happened twenty years ago. He asks his father Abe about it, and Abe will appear with cat eyes saying that nothing happened. Bart then sneaks up, and cuts Homer's arm with a ratchet, and Homer strangles him. Soon, Springfield is destroyed, and time seems to repeat itself.

Bart secretly has a crush on Krabappel
He passed the fourth grade, despite that he still stays in school. She always turns to him whenever she has an emotional problem and he is happy to help her out. She even remarked in one episode that Bart is the closest thing to a man in her life. Last but not least in one of the fortune telling episodes where Bart is a teen she tries unsuccessfully to seduce him while being Homer's wingman.
 * I can't remember what episode this was in, but in one when Bart was daydreaming about getting high grades, he smacks her butt to thank her for giving him a good grade.

Matt Groening and/or the writers have Perverse Sexual Lust for Lisa
Explains a lot.

The "Frank Nelson Type" or as Homer calls him "That Jerk That Goes Ye-e-e-es?" is Stalking Homer.
It could explain why is it when Homer goes to a store, he keeps seeing this guy. It can be assumed that in order to get closer to Homer he must have different jobs depending on Homer's location, especially Costington's. it's obvious because he seems so happy to see Homer and Homer is the only Simpson who mostly interacts with this guy so therefore this guy is gay for Homer... but not for Moleman!

The last season will involve revoking the Status Quo Is God.
It's only fitting that, if its the end, they might as well do something they've never done before(and they've done a lot). Examples of what they could do can be posted below, as well as a scenario.
 * Abe Simpson's death. Considering Homer's "daddy issues", it would be quite interesting to see what emotions he might go through, and how the family will react to one another. I see it as this: the family ends up forgetting/ignoring a routine visit to the Retirement place, unaware that Abe suffered a heart attack due to Jasper cutting in line to his meds. As Abe spends his last days in a hospital bed, there will be massive tension between Homer and Abe. Homer will end up using this time to call the old man out for his poor and abusive parenting skills, and letting this contribute to the way he is. Marge and the kids will call Homer out, but Homer will stand by his words. Pissed off, he'll leave the family to "think about things". At Moe's bar, he'll start talking about it. Moe, being the Jerk With a Heart of Gold we love, will point out that he's being a Jerkass, and should really think if Abe deserved those words. Homer will think about it, and then realise that, while mean, Abe really tried to/does love his son, and is much like himself in that regard. Cue Homer bawling his eyes out, feeling that his dad will die with sadness and hate for what he said. Surprisingly, Grandpa appears in the bar, apologizing for what he's done. Homer will smile hard, saying "it's okay dad, you don't need to apologize." They'll have a last beer together, and Abe will die in peace, with a grin on his face. Commence crying.

Bart is The Antichrist
At the end of Gone Maggie Gone, he does end up turning everything into a living hell.

The writer(s) of Boys of Bummer and Million Dollar Abie has/have serious issues
Obviously

Astrid from "Mom and Pop Art" is Astrid from White Oleander grown up
It would explain her preference for outsider art.

Weller is her middle name or whatever.

Jebediah Springfield isn't his real name
Rather, the town was founded by Jebediah Spring, while his rival was Shelby Manhattan.

Homer Simpson is immortal, or at the very least has superhuman endurance.
Think about it: not only has he gotten over injuries that would maim or kill an average human being, but he has actually "died" on rare occasion(for example, his heart stopping in "Homer's Triple Bypass", causing his spirit to leave his body but later to return to it for cake). Despite a horrendous diet, he's only overweight. He even was punished by eating toxic nuclear waste and it didn't seem to affect him at all. My guess is that Homer Simpson somehow gained immortality, or at least an enormous Healing Factor from all the radioactivity he deals with. Hey, it mutated Lego land, so mutating Homer isn't too much of a stress.