Multiple Choice Past/Quotes

""I took a look at my thoughts, my appearance, my expressions, my mannerisms and idiosyncracies and didn't like them. So I stripped myself down, chucked things out and replaced them with a completely new personality. When I heard someone say something intelligent, I used it later as if it were my own. When I saw a quaility in someone that I liked, I took it. I still do that.""

- The Thin White Duke

"I mean, what is it with you? What made you what you are? Girlfriend killed by the mob, maybe? Brother carved up by some mugger? Something like that, I bet...something like that. Something like that...happened to me, you know. I'm - not exactly sure what it was. If I'm going to have a past, I prefer it to be multiple choice!"

- The Joker to Batman, The Killing Joke

""Okay, so there's this comic who can't make an audience laugh... I think that's how this one goes, I forget sometimes... Oh, you've heard that one? All right. Ah, I can't keep 'em straight. How about the one where a mob killer named Napier comes to Gotham and-- No, wait, you're too young for that one. I know. This one always works. So a small-time yutz in a Red Hood walks into a factory, right? He's there to steal the payroll...""

- The Joker in The Origin of The Joker

"Hugo Strange: I have read twelve different accounts of your past. All different, except for one detail: Batman. Joker: What can I say? I like to keep things interesting. A wise man once told me that if you have to have an origin story, you're better off making it multiple choice."

- Batman: Arkham City

"J.D: No. No more! Here are some of the lies you've told us over the last five years. "You went to Harvard." "You have a wife who only has a pointer and "thumb-pinky"." "You have a, a "brother-dad", a "mother-sister"?" "You have two kids, no, wait, you have one kid, no, you had a baby with a Chinese local!" "You're a deaf mute!" Oh, wait, now you're telling us that you're a world-class hurdler and you slept with the beautiful and irreplacable Amy Carter? Janitor: I-I didn't sleep with Amy Carter. We did everything but. J.D: (groans) Janitor: And I really was a world-class hurdler."

- Scrubs

"Bashir: You know, I still have a lot of questions to ask you about the past. Garak: I've given you all the answers I'm capable of. Bashir: You've given me answers, alright, but they were all different. What I want to know is, out of all the stories you've told me, which ones were true and which ones weren't? Garak: My dear Doctor, they're all true. Bashir: Even the lies? Garak: Especially the lies."

- Star Trek Deep Space Nine, "The Wire"

"Pinkie Pie: *after supposedly telling the story of how she got her cutie mark* And that's how Equestria was made!... Maybe on the way home, I can tell you the story of how I got my cutie mark. It's a gem!"

- My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic, "The Cutie-Mark Chronicles"