Ocean's Eleven/Funny

"Reuben: But what am I saying? You guys are pros! The best! I'm sure you'll make it out of the casino. Ah, but lest we forget, once you're out the front door, you're still in the middle of the FUCKING DESERT!"
 * Before Reuben is convinced the job is a good idea, he relays the stories of the three greatest robberies in the history of Las Vegas casinos (only one of whom even made it out the front door) to Rusty and Danny:

"Danny: Ten ought to do it, don't you think? Rusty: *says nothing* Danny: You think we need one more? Rusty: *still says nothing* Danny: You think we need one more. Rusty: *further nothing* Danny: All right, we'll get one more. *walks off* Rusty: *blinks*"
 * Danny and Rusty's "conversation" before they pick up Linus:

"Virgil: Alright, you start. Turk: (With disdain) Okay, go ahead, I got one. Virgil: Are you gonna think of one, or- Turk: (Interrupting) No, I've already thought of one, I'm not going think of one. Virgil: (Egging him on) Alright, so you're thinking of one right now. Turk: No, I'm done thinking about, I have it in my head. Virgil: Fine. Are you a man. Turk: Yes, nineteen. Virgil: Are you alive. Turk: (Impatiently) Yes, eighteen. Virgil: Evel Knievel. Turk: ...shit!"
 * "Where the FUCK you been?" Made even funnier by the fact that this is one of only two lines in the entire trilogy that Yen says in English.
 * While waiting for Danny, Basher, and Yen to steal the "pinch," Linus is stuck in the getaway van with the "Bickering Brothers" Virgil and Turk Malloy. Cue hilariousness:

"Female FBI Agent: I'm proud of you...we both are. (Beat) Linus: Oh come on,"
 * The end of Ocean's Twelve.


 * "I won eleven million dollars!"
 * "How's the game?" "Longest hour of my life." "What?" "I said I'm running away with your wife!" "Great!"
 * "You rehearsed that speech, didn't you?" "Little bit, did I rush it?"
 * "Is that - are you watching Oprah!?
 * "He's in the Casino by the slots."
 * "I wonder what Reuben will say?" (cut to Reuben) "YOU'RE OUTTA YOUR GODDAMN MINDS!"