Penny Arcade (Webcomic)/Funny

"Gabe: I heard someone talking about tits and breasts!
 * "And For My Next Trick": "DAYTONAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!"
 * Gabe learns a new word!
 * I Hope You Like Text.
 * "You're arguing for a universe with fewer waffles in it," I said. "I'm prepared to call that cowardice."
 * This and Tycho's delivery.
 * While discussing Bayonetta...

Tycho: Weren't you at the mall?

Gabe: ...yes."

"Jerry: I achieved victory but at what cost?
 * This news post with Tycho's efforts to run a charity are horribly subverted by Gabe.
 * Gabe and Tycho are playing In Famous as bad, bad men.
 * Gabe's hiccup remedy.
 * Battle not with nerds, lest ye become nerdy.
 * Despite the embarrassment, Gabe posts a comic he drew in eighth grade. Tycho mocks the writing, but instantly changes his tune when Gabe threatens to post some of his old writing.
 * Tycho describes their quest to make carrot cake soup, and his fear that the authorities will try to stop them. From the same rant, he suffers game withdrawal and starts seeing Venice as an FPS level. Then he goes into an internet cafe to find them playing the city on Counter-Strike. "The psychotic break made was practically audible...Thank God that place had a liquor license."
 * Tycho is considering creating a harem. His wife... disagrees.
 * The Abridged versions of the presentations by Microsoft, Nintendo and Sony at E3. "Nintendo, bitches! We out."
 * Tycho can't stand the thought of losing to Gabe at Words With Friends just from Gabe button mashing.
 * Even better when you look up what "churl" means.
 * God help you if you mix up Tycho's ice cream order.
 * The Unhorse.
 * Cha Cha Cha Changes.
 * I play violent video games! I could snap any minute!
 * Tycho uses the Wii Weather Channel to destroy a life.
 * "I'll tell you this: the best thing about the placenta is cold placenta sandwiches the next day."
 * From PATV Episode, 4th Panel of Racist Clocks. Jerry hurt his back playing ping pong earlier that day:

At what cost Michael?!

Michael: I don't care."

"Mike: I heard that sometimes if someone presses on your prostate you cum. I've heard that.
 * From PATV, season 2, episode 7.

Jerry: (beat) How...how much do you wanna know? About that?"

"Tycho: We put up today’s comic on Friday because it was inconceivable to conceive of thinking that they still wouldn’t have their shit together by today. In the interim, its spicy payload has only grown more intense, like kimchi."
 * It Only Doesn't. Made even funnier by the fact that it's structured exactly like an "It Only Does" ad, so you can imagine it becoming real for yourself.
 * Not to mention that the strip became both Harsher in Hindsight and Hilarious in Hindsight when, well...

"Barrett: I'M GONNA BREAK YOU IN HALF!
 * Whyyyyyyyyyy
 * "I might grind, there may be grinding."
 * "911? I've cut off all my fingers. They're all gone. It is excruciating, yes!"
 * "Using this Macbook is like putting my dick in a George Foreman Grill. Okay? It's like making a penis panini."
 * "You understand that there's more to Dissidia than murdering Tidus over and over."
 * "BAM! So, suck it! ...for the children."
 * "I saw where a hippo was not, and said, no. This will not do."
 * Anneservice, Part 4, aka the geek's hat trick.
 * On Crippling Overspecialization in the new Deus Ex.

Nerd!Jensen: Oh yeah? Well... well... I'll hack into your laptop and read all your mail!"

"It’s like Shark Week on the Discovery Channel, but with one key difference."
 * This lampooning of Warhammer 40 K's Grimdark nature.
 * An option that Xbox Live desperately needs.
 * How are these exterminators still in business?!?
 * Either Gabe fails at nerdiness, or he's just trolling Tycho. Either way, hilarious.
 * Tycho's Oh Crap face in the last panel as he realizes what's coming. Epic.
 * There's nothing quite like innocently clicking your shortcut to Penny Arcade and being confronted with a giant banner proclaiming...  .

"I can't let these guys know how much I hate Kingdom Hearts.
 * The Dickerdoodle contest. Investigate further at your own peril.
 * Perhaps the best was one long, detailed post by Gabe about the contest, including pictures of the Dickerdoodles and people making them in suggestive positions. Said post was sandwiched between two of Tycho's posts, the first being some information about the Child's Play event, the second consisting entirely of an angry, "GOD DAMMIT I AM TRYING TO RUN A CHARITY HERE!"
 * Everyone Else Seems to Like It

Gabe: I hate Kingdom Hearts.

Shit! Alright, damage control.

Gabe: I like Kingdom Hearts.

Well played.

KH Fan: Huh?

Uh-oh. Think of something! Fast!

Gabe: Hair!

That may have been too fast."


 * On Yahoo! Maps giving driving directions.
 * How to install the GBA Afterburner.
 * I submit this as a crowning moment.