Hogs of War



The Turn of the Millennium saw the release of this game, where Commanding General I. P. Grimly guides the player and his army of pigs through a devilishly difficult campaign single-player mode, while there's also a "free play" single-or-multi player mode.

The plot, mirroring how meaningless wars are, is as basic as it gets: there's an island filled with swill, and your pigs' country wants it. Of course, you don't get to the island before having to conquer an entire country. Guess what the premise leads to.

A sequel was announced, but it happened when Infogrames happened to go through bankruptcy and therefore became yet another case of Vaporware, next to Duke Nukem Forever.

"VICTORY! Tea and crumpets for leading generals!"
 * Affectionate Parody: Of various war films.
 * Amusing Injuries: When a Made of Explodium soldier dies, well, he blows up - the catch, though, is that we have a pair of smoking boots.
 * Badass Boast: Several, including:
 * I stradle the battlefield like a mighty colossus!
 * Badass Longcoat: Spy class
 * Cool Shades: The Spy class again.
 * Damage Is Fire
 * Death From Above: Airstrikes. You can also pull off this one with a Jetpack too, if your timing is good enough.
 * Downer Ending:
 * Drill Sergeant Nasty: Commanding General I. P. Grimly is either an Affectionate Parody or a Lawyer-Friendly Cameo of R. Lee Ermey's Sergeant Hartman "character". See him here.
 * Excuse Plot: there's an archipelago filled with food for pigs (swill). Your country wants it. Cue war.
 * Facing the Bullets One-Liner: The pigs give these when they die, the tropes they cover could have a page of their own;
 * Blatant Lies/Only a Flesh Wound: "Superficial damage captain!" "I'm just...winded."
 * "I feed on violence... and now... I'm... full..."
 * Final Death: If during a mission one of your hogs are killed, on the post-mission screen their picture will be bruised and beaten, but they remain in your squad. If however three of your squad members are killed in battle, then one of them will be permanently deceased, which means losing all your precious promotions for that soldier as well (something which the player is usually unprepared for). If four squad members are killed in battle, two are permanently deceased.
 * Gang Up on the Human: The final campaign mission consists of 5 computer controlled teams (the ones you didn't pick and Team Lard) all sending their best troops to kill you. They never go after each other, though it is justified in that you've more or less taken over the world.
 * Gluttonous Pig: The main premise of the game is that massive armies of pigs fight a bloody war for a continent full of swill.
 * Healing Hands: The Medic class. Literally, their "Healing Hands" move is them rubbing hands together and touching the patient in question.
 * Healing Shiv: The Medic also has access to a variety of these.
 * Hey, It's That Voice!: Starring Rik Mayall. As everybody.
 * Home by Christmas: Referenced in two cutscenes.
 * Incredibly Lame Pun: A veritable Hurricane of Puns about 'saving your bacon', and so on.
 * Large Ham: A few of the pigs do this. Appropriately enough.
 * Mobile Shrubbery: Pigs trained in espionage can use items to hide themselves.
 * New Game+: On completing the campaign mode as one country, you can take it back from them as the purple Team Lard.
 * News Parody: When completing an area, you get the front page of a newspaper with appropriate headlines and photos depending on how well you did.


 * Punny Name: I. P. Grimly.
 * Ring Out: When a pig gets blown clear out of the map, he explodes, quite undramatically.
 * Shout-Out: As noted above, both the cover art and the Drill Sergeant Nasty.
 * And the theme song is "Sousa Liberty Bell March".
 * Elvis Presley and Chekov are present in all but name among the pig voices.
 * "Stay off the moors!"
 * Soundtrack Dissonance: The aforementioned Sousa Liberty Bell March heard in the Main Menu; the BGM for the actual gameplay also counts, because it's pretty darn relaxing in comparison to the Real Time Strategy you have to deal with, given the time limit.
 * The victory fanfare is a debatable example, depending on the interpretation: the first notes deliberately have a very bittersweet feel to them, in order to sum up the pointlessness of war in musical form.
 * Super Drowning Skills: Anyone below commando level. They can swim, but even a full health pig drowns very quickly if trying to swim.
 * Super Not-Drowning Skills: Pigs that rank commando or higher can swim safely.
 * Surgery Under Fire: Includes MASH tents on some levels, and any pigs stationed in them will find themselves healed each turn. Of course, these make excellent targets for the enemy.
 * The game also includes a medic class, who can heal up close with his healing hands, at a distance with medicine darts, and even en masse by throwing a gas grenade full of healing vapours into a trench. In the case of the latter, you'd better hope enemy combatants aren't positioned downwind.
 * Take That: In the Pig Pen map, you can see a tile depicting a worm cut in half. Messily.
 * Tank Goodness: There are vehicles.
 * Toilet Humour: Pigs have a habit of farting when they disguise themselves.
 * Trauma Inn: MASH tents and bunkers. Being in one for a set amount of turns heals a pig.
 * Trick Bomb: 'Medicene Balls' and 'Poison Gas'.
 * There Is No Kill Like Overkill
 * War Is Hell: Parodied shamelessly and brutally.