Jumanji/Funny

"Sarah (worried she might be seeing things): You just saw three monkeys go by on a motorcycle, didn't you? Judy: Yeah. Sarah: Good girl."
 * Monkey madness dosen't begin to cover this movie.

"Alan: He's a hunter. He kills things, that's what he does. And right now, he wants to hunt me and kill me, okay? Sarah: Why you? Alan: Why me? I don't know. Everything about me he finds offensive. You'd think it'd be a waste of his time. Maybe he needs something for his wall, you know, a Parrish - something to go between penguin and partridge."
 * Sarah and Alan try to understand the crazy hunter from the game.

"Alan: Sarah and I would very much like to get out of the floor now, so it's your turn, Peter."
 * After Alan congratulates Judy on her quick thinking.

"Carl: Fine! Take it!"
 * After a huge vine has swiped Carl's police car.

"Carl: I should've been a fireman!"
 * And before that, when the vine slithers past Carl's face and he starts screaming and jumps out the car.
 * Again, Carl is the universe's whipping boy.

"Judy, in a posh British accent: Oh, I'm sorry, dear, you have the wrong number."
 * Van Pelt declares that Alan should be arriving 'any moment now'. He arrives almost exactly then... screaming, in a cop car, crashing through cheap walls, and colliding with a wall of paint-cans that falls on Van Pelt.
 * After a music stand and trombone prove useless at getting Alan out of the quicksand: "Stop giving me things that come apart!"
 * The scene where Peter scrambles to find a way into the shed to get the axe the group desperately needs. He finds the door locked, and can't get in, so he grabs a nearbye axe and starts whaling away with it... only to stop, take a look at the axe, then at the camera, and runs back to the group.
 * Aunt Nora tries to call the house in the middle of all the chaos.

"Sarah: Don't ever call me crazy, Alan. Ever. 'Cause everyone in the town has called me crazy ever since I told the cops that you were sucked into a board game."
 * When Carl and Aunt Nora get blown away by the water bursting through the doors...then float down the street on the flood, clinging to the doors, see the crocodile swim between them--and scream.
 * When Alan asks Sarah if she's crazy when she asks about fighting the psycho with the elephant rifle, she retorts with a deadpan putdown that must be heard to be truly appreciated:


 * The Lion has his fair share of hilarious scenes. First after Alan has him locked in one of the rooms, the Lion just lazes about on the bed, like a big cat that found the ultimate vacation spot.  Then when Nora comes home to look for Judy and Peter, she stumbles upon the Lion who just roars at her, prompting her to shut the door. Lastly when Alan is swinging on a vine trying to get the game during an Earth quake the lion swipes at him, as though he was tying to aggressively catch a ball of string.