Reality Is Out to Lunch/Quotes

"The area around the tower of Al Khali, under the relentless magical bombardment, was already drifting beyond that reality horizon where time, space and matter lose their separate identities and start wearing each other's clothes. It was quite impossible to describe. Here is what it looked like. It looked like a piano sounds shortly after being dropped down a well. It tasted yellow, and felt paisley. It smelled like a total eclipse of the moon. Of course, nearer to the tower it got really weird."

- Sourcery, Terry Pratchett

"Ghosts aren't a rare sight in here. Things that exist tend to disappear, while things that don't tend to appear. Auditory hallucinations and similar occurences aren't out of the ordinary. You won't get the job done if you lose composure whenever it happens. Besides, world-renowned scientists are working day and night to solve similar supernatural phenomena in this facility. Our job is to provide an optimal working environment for them, which isn't an easy thing to do. In any case you guys aren't allowed to leave this place for the next month without exception. Even if you die."

- PANDORA employee at Hell's Gate complex to the fresh laboratory rats... er, infiltrated agents and other janitors, Darker than Black

"Arthur: Ford... I think I'm a sofa... Ford: I know how you feel."

- The Hitchhikers Guide to The Galaxy (film)

"I don't know what you, as outsiders, can do about this place. If you try to nuke it, then the missile will probably change into a sperm whale or something. If you send soldiers, their weapons might backfire, or not work at all, or turn into bananas."

- David Abraham, Improbable Island

"This is the universe calling to tell Tagon that his reality check has bounced."

- Narator, Schlock Mercenary