Mad Doctor/Quotes

"Mr. Herriott insists on being called "Dr.", having a Ph.D. in naturopathic medicine, but is strangely reticent to mention where it comes from--possibly because the true center of naturopathy, Narnia, can only be found by those pure of heart."

- Cracked.com, "5 Books That Can Actually Make You Stupider"

"Ze healing is not as rewarding as ze hurting."

- The Medic, Team Fortress 2

"You should be grateful. Once I remove your skin you will feel so much cooler..."

- Urien Rakarth, Master Haemonculus, Warhammer 40000

"Dr. Horror, Dr. Horror, your heart's of blackest kind

Dr. Horror, Dr. Horror, the raw perverted mind

Dr. Horror, Dr. Horror, masskiller on the grind

Dr. Horror, Dr. Horror, a modern Frankenstein"

- Dr. Horror by Running Wild

"Fetch me another plaything. This one seems to have broken."

- Urien Rakarth, Warhammer 40000

"Now this is gonna 'urt a LOT but you'll be bettah, you'll see!"

- The Mad Dok, Dawn of War

"One more word out of you and I'll perform another unnecessary surgery!"

- Doctor Oscar Schneiderbunk, Visser M.D., Phoenix Command

"Steinman: Four-oh silk and... done.

Nurse: The nose looks terrific, Doctor Steinman. ...Doctor?

Steinman: You know, looking at it now... I didn't realize how much her face sags... Scalpel.

Nurse: Excuse me?

Steinman: Scalpel!

Nurse: Uh, doctor, she's not booked for a face lift...

Steinman: Let's just come in here and... (begins whistling cheerfully)

Nurse: Doctor... stop cutting... Doctor, stop cutting! Get me the chief of surgery! Get me the chief of surgery now!"

- Audio Diary, "Not What She Wanted," Bioshock

"You don't like it? But almost everyone has two hands! Five digits? Pffff. How boring! You, now... you're interesting now!"

- Ratchet, Transformers Shattered Glass, on Rodimus not being impressed with his new buzzsaw hand

"ABOVE ALL DO NO HARM"

- Dr. Steinmann, scrawled in the blood of his patients, Bioshock

"As the mad surgeon said, "Mind if I... cut in?""

- Elvira, Mistress of the Dark

"Operate! Operate! Still time to operate!"

- Mad Dok Grotsnik, Warhammer 40000

"Wait, wait, it gets better... When ze patient woke up, his skeleton was missing, and ze doctor was never heard from again! Ahahahahahaha! ...Anyway, zat's how I lost my medical license."

- The Medic, Team Fortress 2

"Dr. Barber: Hmmm...good news. You have the plague.

Patient: Why is that good news?

Dr. Barber: Because now I get to conduct medical experiments!"

- The Marvelous Misadventures of Flapjack

"What can I do with this one, Aphrodite? She won't! Stay! Still! I want to make them beautiful, but they always turn out wrong! That one, too fat! This one, too tall! This one, too symmetrical! And now... what's this, Goddess? An intruder?! He's ugly! Ugly! Ugly! UGLYYYYYYYY!"

- Dr. Steinmann, Bioshock