Goldilocks

Goldilocks is a classic folktale, written in what's almost its current form by Robert Southey in 1837.

Once upon a time, there was a little girl called Goldilocks whose hair was the color of gold. One day, she took a walk in the woods and came to a house where three bears lived - a papa bear, a mama bear and a baby bear. The bears weren't home, but they'd left their door unlocked, and so Goldilocks came in.

There were three bowls of porridge she tasted. Papa Bear's was too hot, Mama Bear's was too cold, but Baby Bear's was just right. Goldie ate Baby Bear's food, for she was hungry. Then there were three chairs she tested. Papa Bear's was too hard, Mama Bear's was too soft, but Baby Bear's was just right — or it would've been if it hadn't broken under her.

Then there were three beds she tested. Papa Bear's was too hard, Mama Bear's was too soft, but Baby Bear's was just right, and she fell asleep there.

Then the bears came home. They saw the evidence of the break-in, the eating of porridge, the sitting in chairs, the sleeping in beds. Goldilocks didn't wake up until they got there, so you can guess how it ends.

Like many Fairy Tales, this one has evolved over the years. According to that other wiki, the original tale was probably that of Scrapefoot the vixen (as in a fox), who was an unwelcome guest at the bears' castle (yes, you read right. Castle). Robert Southey apparently heard this tale from an uncle and was the first to publish it. However, he accidentally thought it was the wrong kind of vixen who, in turn, got changed into a mean old woman who, after not being invited around to the bears' place, decides to go check it out for herself. She falls out the window and is never seen again. Goldilocks as we know her only turns up in Joseph Cundall's version 12 years later and only to stop confusion with other old ladies in other fairy tales.

As with other fairy tales, we have seen Goldie and the bears get fractured until they are shattered.


 * Curiosity Killed the Cast
 * Everything's Worse with Bears
 * Fairy Tale
 * Fractured Fairy Tale: Many, but arguably the two best known are from Fables and Roald Dahl's Revolting Rhymes.
 * Hair of Gold
 * Oral Tradition
 * Rule of Three: Three bears, three bowls of porridge, three chairs, three beds.
 * Survivalist Stash
 * Too Dumb to Live: Hey, look, a mysterious unlocked house in the middle of the creepy woods. Lets go inside!
 * Villain Protagonist: Goldilocks the burglar.