Hidden Prophices

Hidden Prophecies, or "Prophices" as it is spelled, is a ridiculously strange Warrior Cats fic written by Tainted Purification. The grammar isn't awful, but the story is one of the most bizarre and hilariously terrible things ever to happen to Warriors fanfiction. It might be a Troll Fic deconstruction of typical Original Character Warriors fanfiction and possibly the series itself, if only because of the not-so-kid-friendly-violence.

The story stars Moonshimmer as we learn about her adventures in Emeraldclan (Or was it Sapphireclan?) as she learns of a mysterious prophecy, meets many new friends, fights ridiculously violent battles, and discovers that her brother Lilypaw wants to...you guessed it -- take over the clans. (OF COURSE!)

It can be read at this link here.

Compare/contrast with Starkit's Prophecy. See also Ruby Ghosts.

"“Why is everyone calling me a troll? I don't live under a bridge and eat goats!”"
 * Awesome McCoolname: Attempted, but...
 * Back From the Dead: Moonshimmer has powers to bring back characters from the dead, and she uses them a few times. However, some characters, such as Sunsetshine, come back from the dead with no explanation. Also... Jasminedung. Just Jasminedung.
 * Beware the Nice Ones: Gaysparkle somehow turned out to be evil.
 * Break the Cutie: One particular scene in chapter five, in which Lilypaw attempts to do this to Gaypaw with... short-term results.
 * Came Back Wrong: Jasminedung, in her zombie form.
 * Captain Obvious: "Being mean means you are not nice."
 * Not to mention all the instances of "X who was really Y in disguise!"
 * Card-Carrying Villain: Lilyblossom/Deathstar
 * Completely Missing the Point: In response to being called a troll...

"“He screeched as the enemy warrior ripped his belly apart and his guts spilled out onto the ground. Blood leaked everywhere shining in the midday sun! It flowed crimson until it had leaked onto the paws of every warrior standing around! Suddenly they all jumped into battle and began slashing at each other left and right. It could have all been avoided if they had listened to Moonpaw's wise and insightful words.”"
 * Death by Childbirth: Seemingly what happens to Moonpaw, Tranquilpaw, and Lilypaw's mother.
 * Department of Redundancy Department: "I am Ancient!" said Ancient. And he was Ancient!
 * "Yes it is dark! And soon your eyes will be very accustomed to the dark! Because you'll be stuck here in the dark!" Jasminedung said, but they only knew it was her because of her voice, because it was dark!
 * Depraved Bisexual: Lilyblossom, and oddly enough Gaysparkle.
 * Enfante Terrible: Lilykit murdering Lavenderstar. Bonus points to the fact that he had only just been born.
 * "Everybody Laughs" Ending: Chapter 16. Yes, the same chapter where.
 * Everyone Is Bi: Not everyone as far as we know, but no one seems to care about gender.
 * Eye Scream:.
 * And no one seems to notice until very later.
 * Gender Bender: Sunsetshine... male or female? Who knows?
 * Gaysparkle occasionally shifted to female for a while.
 * Gorn: And how!
 * From chapter 1:

"“Do not be so upset there was just a simple border fight with Rubyclan.”"
 * In the same chapter, we get this gem:

"“"Now if you will please excuse me I have to get back to your sister! We have some mmm... plans tonight if you know what I mean!"”"
 * Heroic BSOD: Vanillastar suffers heavily from this, breaking down into full-on emo because he thinks he's an awful leader.
 * Ho Yay: . . According to Chapter 10,  . Shadowseeker flirting with Sunsetshine might count, but we really can't tell if Sunsetshine was a guy at the time.
 * Incest Subtext:
 * Insane Troll Logic: What this story lives off of.
 * If You Know What I Mean:
 * Insane Troll Logic: What this story lives off of.
 * If You Know What I Mean:

"“They all went to the gathering place. Moonpaw was amazed by what she saw! Four giant gemstones that glowed in the full moon! It was so beautiful, and the glow hit Moonpaw's pelt and made her more beautiful. It made Shadowseeker fall in love with her!”"
 * Lampshade Hanging: "This is such a shocking and horrible turn of events." Moonshimmer said sadly.
 * Large Ham: Every sentence must be ended in exclamation points! Even if it doesn't need emphasis! This girl needs to stop abusing the shift-1 key! I don't know anyone who uses exclamation points so much!
 * Les Yay:.
 * Love At First Sight: Shadowseeker with Moonpaw.

""Oh geeze, shut your stupid mouth already Lilyblossom!" Tranquildream hissed, turning around and scratching her brother on the nose! No one had expected her to do this since she was usually so calm and kind and easy going. She had just finally lost her temper. Lilyblossom did not know what to do. He had blood dripping off of his nose and into his open mouth. His ears went flat. He had just been told to shut up in front of the whole Emeraldclan! This was so embarrassing. "If you would just keep your stupid mouth shut and stop being such a mean cat you could be a good member of this clan. But no… you won't. You just carry on and on and I am sick of it so SHUT UP STUPID LILYBLOSSOM!""
 * Love Dodecahedron: Great StarClan... Vanillastar/Lavenderstar, Vanillastar/Moonshimmer, Moonshimmer/Phantom, Phantom/Triolet, Phantom/Deathstar, Deathstar/Jasminedung, Jasminedung/Sunsetshine, Sunsetshine/Daydreamheart, Sunsetshine/Gaysparkle, Shadowseeker/Sunsetshine, Shadowseeker/Moonshimmer, Moonshimmer/Gaysparkle, Gaysparkle/Tranquildream, Gaysparkle/Deathstar, Ancient/Deathstar...
 * Love Makes You Evil:.
 * Luke, I Am Your Father: Happens twice. First, when Sparklestar is revealed to be the mother of the three siblings... and then when Sunsetshine, the gender-bending cat is revealed to be their father, despite having been pregnant just a little while ago and then going back to nursing kits just a couple of chapters later.
 * Mood Swinger: The author's notes.
 * “All of you flamers are stupid so go away and leave me alone! I NEVER DID ANYTHING TO YOU SO JUST SHUT UP AND GO AWAY! I HATE YOU ALL! thakn you to all the people hwo support my writing, you are all nice and i appreciate it. ALL OF THE REST OF YOU GO AWAY!”
 * Names to Run Away From Really Fast: Deathheart, apparently.
 * New Powers as the Plot Demands: Most of which are not important to the plot.
 * Promoted Fanboy: Gaypaw used to adore and follow around Lilypaw to the point of being utterly obnoxious, and now they're.
 * Rickroll: "Do not worry I am never going to give you up!"
 * Shout-Out: In Chapter 16, Deathstar calls Gaysparkle Gallifrey as a nick-name.
 * Shut UP, Hannibal: Lilyblossom in Chapter 13 calls everyone in Emeraldclan/Sapphireclan stupid. His sister, Tranquildream, tells him to shut up.
 * Shut UP, Hannibal: Lilyblossom in Chapter 13 calls everyone in Emeraldclan/Sapphireclan stupid. His sister, Tranquildream, tells him to shut up.


 * Small Annoying Creature: A recent addition to the cast, Peep the half-mouse, half-dragon.
 * Spin-Off: The Day Of The Orchids, a story about how Gaypaw turned evil, even though he was good as an apprentice.
 * Split Personality:.
 * Sublime Rhyme: "They were both mad and sad, but fighting was bad."
 * Take That, Critics!: Jasminedung, who is a reference to one of her reviewers, Jasmine.
 * Strangely, Jasminedung later becomes a good character and changes her name to just Jasmine. What does this imply?
 * ... Until we find out that Jasmine is really.
 * Technicolor Eyes: Deathstar has rainbow eyes.
 * The Dragon: Peep, or at least when he was a dragon.
 * Title Drop: "Well it all started on the Day of the Orchids..."
 * Unfortunate Name: Suicidekit, Sugarplumspirit, Lilyblossom, etc.
 * Lampshaded in Chapter 9, where Gaysparkle is asked, "Are you really gay or was your mother just really mean?"
 * Unholy Matrimony:.