Lilo & Stitch (Disney film)/Funny

"Lilo: (on the phone with Bubbles) Oh good, my dog found the chainsaw! (hangs up, leaving Bubbles terrified at the other end of the line)"
 * The Trailers for the film in which Stitch disrupts Award Bait Song scenes from other disney Movies. My personal favorite is the Beauty and The Beast one, in which Stitch crashes the chandelier, Beast and Belle roll out of the way, Belle huffs "I'll be in my room." and stomps off, Stitch giving off a Wolf Whistle as she passes by, saying "get your own movie!"
 * This bit:

"Lilo: (completely deadpan) Wow. San Francisco."
 * After Lilo tells Stitch to build something and he sets out creating something we can't see, at first.

""No more caffeine for you.""
 * Afterwards attacks it, leading Lilo to say:

""Uhh...sure. But I'll have to make two trips.""
 * Stitch learning to dance.
 * When Cobra confronts Nani about losing her job, Stitch walks up behind Nani while holding a book. He stares innocently at Cobra for a moment, growls and, without any provocation at all, chucks the freaking book at Cobra's face.
 * When one of the lenses of Cobra's sunglasses pops out as a belated reaction to the hit.
 * The look on David's face when Lilo asks him to give everyone a lift to the shore. Namely, Lilo, Stitch, Nani, Pleakley, Jumba, and Gantu (although the last one is probably big enough to just wade).

"Gantu: (to Stitch) Abomination.
 * "BLUE PUNCH BUGGY!" Stitch whacks Jumba with a blue punch bug car (the owner: Nani) "NO PUNCH BACKS"
 * This exchange:

Stitch: Stupid-head."

"Gantu: You're vile! You're foul! You're flawed! (all while trying to pound at Stitch at the end of every two words)
 * And what follows from that:

Stitch: (grabs Gantu's hand) Also cute, and fluffy! (and tosses him out of his ship)"

"Jumba: (after he plugs up a plasma gun with a carrot) See? You shouldn't play with guns.
 * This exchange:

Stitch: Awww. Yeah. (casually hands it back to him)

Jumba: (slowly dawning realization) Gah! I just remembered! It is your birthday! Happy Birthday! (hands it back)

Stitch: (throws it back to him) Merry Christmas!

Jumba: (throws it back) It's not Christmas!

Stitch: (throws it back) Happy Hanukkah!

Jumba: (they continue tossing the gun back and forth while Pleakley and Lilo are running away) One potato!

Stitch: Two potato!

Jumba: Three potato!

Stitch: Four!

Jumba: Five potato!

Stitch: Six potato!

Jumba: Seven potato more!

Stitch: My...

Jumba: Mother...

Stitch: Told...

Jumba: Me...

Stitch: You...

Jumba: Are...

Stitch: (disappointed) It.

Jumba: (triumphantly holding the gun up) AHA! I win! (BOOM)"

""My friends need to be punished.""
 * Don't forget Pleakley's hilariously stressed response of "Trust me, this is not going to end well!" as he runs with Lilo out of the house.
 * Lilo and the voodoo doll spoons.

"Hula Instructor: Lilo, why are you all wet?
 * This exchange is very highly quoted among some groups of people. From the very beginning (and please feel free to correct wording):

Lilo: It's sandwich day.

Hula Instructor: (nonplussed)

Lilo: (huge sigh) Every Thursday, I have to give Pudge the fish a peanut butter sandwich.

Hula Instructor: ...Pudge is a fish?

Lilo: And today we were out of peanut butter. So I asked my sister what to make him and she said a tuna sandwich. I can't give Pudge tuna! (whispers) Do you know what tuna is?

Hula Instructor: ...Fish?

Lilo: It's FISH! If I gave Pudge tuna, I'd be an abomination! I'm late because I had to run to the store, and get some peanut butter, because all we had is, is STINKING TUNA!

Hula Instructor: Lilo, Lilo, why is this so important?

Lilo: Pudge controls the weather."

""Awwww, all the other aliens get to make them...""
 * From Stitch Has A Glitch: "NO CROP CIRCLES!!!"

""She's touching me. She's touching me!"
 * Also from Stitch Has A Glitch

"I'm not touching you!"

"SHE'S TOUCHING ME!""

"Pleakley: [Gasps] Don't move! A mosquito has chosen me as her perch! She's so...beautiful...look! Another one! And another one...why, it's a whole flock! And they like me! They're nuzzling my flesh with their noses! And now they're, uh...they're...[Camera cuts away to an aerial view]WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"
 * "I would never, ever" Stitch is revealed "make more than one."
 * This is made even funnier when the TV show reveals that Jumba did.
 * Pleakley discovering the dietary habits of Earth's most "endangered" species.

"Nani: Go to Your Room!
 * Nani and Lilo have an argument:

Lilo: I'M ALREADY IN MY ROOM! *slams door*"

"Nani: (to Pleakley) Your head looks swollen.
 * This exchange, when Nani first sees Pleakley and Jumba in disguise:

Jumba: Actually, she's just ugly."


 * After Stitch steals a tricycle, Jumba talks about how his programming will draw him to large cities, where he'll causes chaos. Stitch cycles around the island trying to find an city, only for Lilo to tell him that there isn't one and he has a fit.