Atlantis: The Lost Empire/Funny

"Vinny: Oh, ehh, gunpowder, nitroglycerin, notepads, fuses, wicks, glue, and uhh… Paperclips. Big ones. You know, just, eh, office supplies."
 * When the Leviathan is attacking the Ulysses, Mrs. Packard sounds the alarm with a monotone, "All hands, abandon ship."
 * In the same scene: "He took his suitcase? Marge, honey. I don't think he's coming back."
 * And when Mrs. Packard is evacuating herself. "I'll have to call you back. No, no, I'll call you." All in the same monotone.
 * This dialogue between Milo and Vinny while loading the sub.

"Milo: Will you look at the size of this? It's gotta be half a mile high, at least. It must have taken hundred -- no, thousands of years to carve this thing. [Vinny blows it up so it falls down over a chasm] Vinny: Hey, look, I made a bridge. It only took me, like, what? Ten seconds? Eleven, tops."
 * When Milo is speaking to Kida in several different languages and she speaks French, Mole excitedly exclaims "She knows my language!" and promptly whispers something in her ear. Her response? Punching him in the face.
 * Made better when the others immediately take a liking to her as a result.
 * Vinny's advice during the final battle: "Don't get shot!"
 * The scene with the pillar.

"Mr. Whitmore: I told him "Thatch, if you actually find that so-called journal of yours, not only will I finance the expedition, I'll kiss you full on the mouth." Imagine my embarrassment when he found the damn thing."
 * It's the gleeful look on Vinny's face that seals the deal.
 * "I know how to swim pretty girl -- good! Pretty good, I swim pretty good."
 * Milo's boxers then inflate after going into the water.
 * The picture of Preston Whitmore and Thaddeus Thatch immediately post-kiss. They're both recoiling, and it looks hilarious. And it's Whitmore's fault.

"Vinny: Hey, Milo, you got somethin' a little more sporty? You know…like a tuna?"
 * When the Ulysses finally descends into the ocean, for a split-second, you can actually see a man waving at the viewers.
 * When Milo starts up one of the flying machines:

"Vinny: Hey, we've done a lot of things we're not proud of -- robbin' graves, plunderin' tombs, double parking… But nobody ever got hurt before! (Beat) Well, somebody probably got hurt, but nobody we knew..."
 * Clearly, Vinny gets all the best lines. From earlier:

Vinny: (upon seeing the sketch of the Leviathan, which resembles a lobster) With something like that, I'd have white wine, I think."

""Trust me on this: you don't wanna know. Audrey? Don't tell him. You shouldn't've told me, but you did, and now I'm telling you, you don't wanna know!""
 * And then there's when he tricks Milo into thinking he drank nitroglycerin. "Don't move, don't breathe, don't do anything...except pray." "BOOM!" *Mole and Vinny walk away and laugh* And later: "Hey, too bad we don't got some nitroglycerin eh, Milo?"
 * Sweet's medical check-up of Milo, ending with him handing Milo two enormous beakers and telling him to fill them up. Milo does a Spit Take on the thermometer in his mouth. "With what?!"
 * Sweet's way of dealing with Mole after poor Milo sat on the dirt collection: show him soap, and yell as Mole retreats, "Back off, creature! Back to the pit from which you came!"
 * Milo getting sick over the side of the ship. "Carrots, why is it always carrots. I didn't even eat carrots."
 * Dr. Sweet, telling Milo that he doesn't want to know about Mole's backstory.


 * Kida trying on Milo's glasses.
 * We are briefly given a shot of Milo and Audrey in an escape pod as Milo nervously chants "it's only a grease trap, it's just like a sink, it's only a grease trap, it's just like a sink..." Just the way Milo's voice sounds when the says the second "sink" gets me every time.
 * "Hah! What have you done? England must never merge﻿ with France!"
 * Vinny, upon seeing the Leviathan picture, which looks like a big lobster. "With something like that I would have white wine I think."