Ironclad

Ironclad is a 2011 action film directed by Jonathan English. Written by English and Erick Kastel, based on a screenplay by Stephen McDool

It is the year 1215 and the rebel barons of England have forced their despised King John to put his royal seal to the Magna Carta, a noble, seminal document that upheld the rights of free-men. Yet within months of pledging himself to the great charter, the King reneged on his word and assembled a mercenary army on the south coast of England with the intention of bringing the barons and the country back under his tyrannical rule. Barring his way stood the mighty Rochester castle, a place that would become the symbol of the rebel's momentous struggle for justice and freedom

This film contains examples of:
""NO SURRENDER!!!""
 * Action Girl: Justified and downplayed with Isabel and Agnes. Justified since women often helped in the defense during sieges by throwing things, cooking hot oil and sometimes fighting as well. Downplayed in that Marshall does not want them to learn how to fight, since he will supposedly protect them, but they still have to eventually. This while he is out for the count.
 * An Arm and A Leg: King John punishes several of the rebels like this, including d'Albini.
 * Anti-Villain: Tiberius doesn't really care that much about John's war, he just wants to make sure that his lands escape Christianization. And thus, realizes that he needs John's support to make that happen. Yes, Denmark was already Christianized by this point, but hey.
 * A Father to His Men: Marshall and Tiberius are this.
 * A Man Is Not a Virgin: Taken to ludicrious extremes with Marshall. Lady Isabel constantly hounds him to the point of telling him, to his face, his vows to *God* are not as important as him shagging her. It almost comes across as cruel given how tormented Marshall is by guilt after giving into his lust.
 * An Axe to Grind: Tiberius, ever so much.
 * The Archer: Marks
 * Arranged Marriage: Isabel and Reginald.
 * Badass Army: The Templars. When three Templars without any weapons attack the Danish mercenaries, they kill a dozen at least easily before overcome by superior numbers.
 * BFS: Marshall's templar longsword. He manages to cut a Danish mercenary in half along with the axe he tried to use to block Marshall's swing.
 * In the very same move, he also cuts off another Danish's weapon-wielding hand ánd slice through another's shield while slicing open his face and chest.
 * Big Damn Heroes: Thomas, Beckett, d'Aubigny and their allies.
 * Bilingual Bonus: We hear some Latin at the dinner table.
 * Blade On a Stick
 * Blondes Are Evil: Tiberius.
 * Subverted however, he's just a Punch Clock Villain.
 * The Cavalry: The French
 * Celibate Hero: Averted.
 * Cold-Blooded Torture: This is King John we're talking about.
 * Corrupt Church: The Pope gives King John a green pass on retaking the castles by force, even after signing the Magna Carta.
 * Death By Adaptation: d'Aubigny. In real life, he survived the siege of Rochester Castle, although he was imprisoned by John after captured it.
 * The Dragon: Tiberius. Not that he's happy about it.
 * Driven to Suicide:
 * Drop the Hammer
 * Epic Flail
 * Eat the Dog: During the siege the garrison had to kill and eat their horses (minus Marshall's because its a templar horse).
 * Fatal Family Photo \ Retirony: Wulfstan. When they recruit him, he tells the girls if he hasn't come back in a certain amount of time, they should go to some relatives and work right away; needless to say that he dies.
 * Gory Discretion Shot: Averted.
 * Grievous Harm With a Body: Coteral kills a danish with a dismembered arm.
 * Heroic Sacrifice: Coteral and Beckett
 * Hey It's That Guy: King John is John Adams
 * The Archbishop of Canterbury is Tywin Lannister
 * Thomas Marshall is Rome's Mark Antony
 * Reginald de Cornhill is Claudius
 * Lady Isabel de Cornhill is Hayden McClain
 * Brian Cox as d'Albini, Lord of Belvoir.
 * Historical Domain Character: King John, Reginald de Cornhill, the Archbishop of Canterbury and William d'Aubigny.
 * Kill'Em All: Only Lady Isabel, Marshall and Guy survive.
 * Knight Templar: Marshall
 * Last Stand
 * Stiff Upper Lip: All the way Up to Eleven.


 * Large Ham: They really didn't need all those fancy siege instruments. Paul Giamatti's King John manages to chew up the entire castle on his own. Brian Cox's Baron d'Albini gets pretty hammy at times, too.
 * Magnificent Seven Samurai: It is a group of seven men who are assembled, to defend Rochester Castle against King John's forces. Though subtle, some characterists could be seen as a nod to the classic film(s), such as one of them being a Naive Newcomer, and another shown chopping wood when the hero finds him.
 * Naive Newcomer: Guy.
 * Noble Top Enforcer: Tiberius to King John. He is only doing this to save his people from being forced to convert to Christianity and enslaved since John agreed to talk to the Pope. He cares for his men and in several scenes is disgusted with John's cruelty.
 * Plucky Girl: Lady Isabel, and the serving girl Agnes are good examples, even joining the men in helping to brace the gate from the Danish battering ram attack, and trying their best to fend them off when they break through.
 * Private Military Contractors: The Danish.
 * Ragtag Bunch of Misfits
 * Red Shirt: de Cornhill's unfortunate castle garrison actually do have a red uniform.
 * The Siege
 * Warrior Monk: Templars are described as such.
 * Very Loosely Based on a True Story: The film is based on the First Baron's War during King John's reign.