The Key to a Successful Interview

The Key To A Successful Interview Is A Good First Impression! is a Ranma One Half Deconstruction Fic written by The Sage of Toads.

As the Trope Codifiers of the Takahashi Couple and one of the oldest pairings in web-based fanfiction, Ranma Saotome and Akane Tendo are best known as one of the most violent pairings in anime. The subtle nuances of their relationship have been explored and examined in thousands of fics since the mid 1990s, but in the majority of cases, their relationship remains a case of Belligerent Sexual Tension.

Interview on the other hand is a Satire, Parody, Pastiche story about what happens when Ranma gets the chance to meet Akane and reveal his curse under nearly-ideal circumstances, allowing them to strike up a functional friendship. Of course they still live in Nerima and Ranma is still going to have to deal with Kuno, Ryouga, and the Fiancee Brigade so it definitely isn't going to stay ordinary...

It has two sidestories: The Spin-Off Beautiful Destroyer Sailor Moon, featuring the story of Sailor Moon taking place in the same verse, and Ranma One Half vs. Scott Pilgrim: The Lonely Power Of Grief, set during the Third Sino-Japanese War Arc.

This fanfic contains examples of:
"Ranma's punch registered a 9.5 on the Richter scale in Switzerland."
 * Achilles Heel: While their bodies can handle poison hidden inside food, the mouths of those who practice the La Belle France School of Martial Arts Fine Dining are super sensative to spicy stuff.
 * Actor Allusion: During a Neon Genesis Evangelion screening/cosplay event, girl-Ranma dresses up as Rei. The other fans remark how she has Rei's voice.
 * Mousse's potato chip eating bit in Chapter 13.
 * Tatewaki Kuno's Cool Shades being the Hierophant's sunglasses.
 * And Call Him George: Azusa of course, until Akane figures out that it's a facade to hide that she is a Broken Bird.
 * Battle Butler and Ninja Maid: The Chardins have one butler and hordes of maids, all combat capable. The butler turns out to be an old friend of Kasumi's.
 * Beauty Is Never Tarnished: Averted hard in the Golden Pair fight
 * Berserk Button: When Ranma insists the Akane isn't his girlfriend, Ryouga accuses him of being gay.

""Oh brother, last week he was the 'Sword that Cleaves Evil', and before that he was 'Walking the path of heaven, he who will rule everything'.""
 * A second one: Hurting Akane.
 * Akane completely loses it in Chapter 15
 * Beware the Nice Ones: Kasumi. And how.
 * Big Damn Heroes: In chapter 19, Azusa saves Akane from Kaori.
 * Black Comedy Rape: What Nabiki does to Ryouga.
 * Brain Bleach: The maids wear blindfolds because the sight of Chardins' stretching their mouths is horrific to look at.
 * Brick Joke: Akane's intent to "fuck Kodachi with a steamroller" during the Kodachi Arc.
 * During Chapter 15's epic battle, Shampoo threw a tugboat into the air that was never mentioned again... until Chapter 21 in an extraordinarily painful fashion.
 * Butt Monkey: Ryouga gets no sympathy from anyone, and even Kuno gets more respect than Gosunkugi.
 * Call Back:
 * The Cameo: Naru and Kitsune from Love Hina make an appearance as a pair of Asuka/Dr. Akagi cosplayers at an Eva convention. Leeron also makes a few appearances but it's not clear yet whether he's also a cosplayer... or not.
 * Chapter 10 revealed that the girl that Ranma borrowed the Rei plugsuit costume from was Ami Mizuno.
 * Mihoshi Kuramitsu as the incompetent immigration official.
 * Chapter 14 reveals Genma's ace-in-the hole, the legendary Grand Master Dio, aka...Donny Osmond?!
 * Speaking of chapter 14, one of Kasumi's flashbacks reveals the doctor that treated Miss Tendo was Ryuuken Ishida from Bleach.
 * In Chapter 20, Rei Hino shows up, and she attends St. Bacchus.
 * Dorothy Catalonia also makes a cameo in chapter 20, as a European exchange student at Furinkan, whose eyebrows were shaved off.
 * The owner of The Little Shop That Wasn't There Yesterday that the gang visits may either be Kagome Higurashi or her descendant, but the man she talks to at the end of Chapter 28 is definately Inuyasha.
 * Celebrity Power: Donny Osmond can fly.
 * Chekhov's Gun: In Chapter 12, an A-10 Thunderbolt II and thousands of rounds for its main gun are mentioned stolen from an air base. It turns up soon enough.
 * Remember the  They brought it out to bring down
 * Cool Pet: The Kuno Family's giant crocodile Mr. Turtle, who also gets a Big Damn Heroes moment alongside Kodachi in Chapter 19.
 * Cool Shades: Kuno in Chapter 20 shows up wearing the glasses he got at the end of the Take-out race. The results are... interesting
 * Crowd Song: the song in chapter 14. Ranma has no idea why he's singing to it.
 * Cute Bruiser: Akane more and more.
 * Darker and Edgier: A bit so. Still funny, but a lot more Black Comedy and vulgarity.
 * Deconstruction Fic
 * Dead Baby Comedy: Chapter 10 casually plays a murder/suicide by plane crash for laughs.
 * Defrosting Ice Queen: Akane starts undergoing this immediately thanks to their better first meeting. She's already masturbating to fantasies of him! Chaste Heroes are perfectly safe, after all.
 * Despair Event Horizon: Akane begins crossing it in wake of losing to Shampoo in 16.
 * The Determinator: Neither a snowstorm nor a horde of security maids can stop Dr. Tofu from rescuing Kasumi.
 * The Dog Bites Back: Most of the maids working for the Chardins were actually there to Work Off the Debt they or their families incurred. When the Chardins are exposed as con men, the maids descend on them after Ranma and co leave.
 * Expy: Shampoo is basically Shenhua from Black Lagoon. Justified by the fact that Shenhua is both Shampoo's cousin and mentor.
 * Flat What: Delivered by the Tendos and Ranma when the news of Genma engaging Ranma to Kaori is revealed.
 * Heroic BSOD: Akane has one of these when she first hears about the marriage agreement. It's actually called a BSOD by the narrative.
 * Hurricane of Puns: Gosunkugi delivers a series of cat puns in chapter 21.
 * I'm a Humanitarian: The only combat technique in Fine Dining Martial Arts involves eating your opponent.
 * The Immodest Orgasm: Chapter 5. Kasumi describes Nabiki's masturbation moaning as "theatrical".
 * Implacable Man: Shampoo.
 * Instant Awesome, Just Add Ninja: Ukyo is shown to be this in chapter 19.
 * Jerkass: Panthyose Taro is even worse than in canon. He has a Freudian Excuse, as, but he's still a worse jerk than in canon.
 * Lampshade Hanging: Akane says at one point that if Kuno's harassment of her keeps up, she'll become a man-hating lesbian. Guess what canon!Akane's Hatedom calls her?
 * Also, when Ranma reveals his curse, he wonders how it could've gone worse and then immediately thinks of the way that Ranma-kun and Akane meet in canon.
 * Laser-Guided Karma: Gosunkugi and Genma get what's coming to them in chapter 21.
 * Lethal Chef: Chapter 17 plays this straight with Akane, but she's more clumsy rather than a culinary-inept.
 * However, that pot of curry she made? It was still bubbling despite being in a freezer for two months!
 * Lightning Bruiser: Invoked by Ranma, who stops one of Ryouga's punches with two fingers and then points out to Akane how much muscle power it takes to be as fast as he is.
 * Made of Iron: The Golden Pair.
 * as Akane gets up from a nearly fatal wound to lay a brutal beating on Azusa.
 * Medium Awareness: When it appears his defeat is nigh, Principal Kuno complains that it was too easy for the protagonists to win and the readers are going to call it anti-climatic.
 * Happens a lot in chapter 21.
 * Principal Kuno to a ridiculous degree
 * More Dakka: Shampoo starts out using just grenade launchers (and who would think you'd ever say that?) and moves up to stealing a Thunderbolt II just to use its Avenger cannon to level Furinkan High School.
 * No-Holds-Barred Beatdown: Shampoo suffers this at the hands of Pantyhose Tarou in Chapter 27.
 * One of Us: Akane. Turns out that when you strip away the tsundere traits you end up with a Star Wars-watching Super Robot Wars-quoting Eva convention-attending nerd.
 * Not just Akane, even Ranma is quite the Otaku. He mentioned getting pirated manga while in China.
 * Paper Tiger: To stop Kasumi's assault on the guests, the Madame St. Paul summons a seven foot muscular male in a maid's outfit to deal with Kasumi. He's gets knocked out by Dr. Tofu Ono with just one punch.
 * The Power of Love: The basis of Ranma's Ki attack.
 * Re Cut: As of May 8, 2011, the author condensed and rewrote several chapters up to the takeout race arc. Notable changes include Shampoo's claim of screwing Ranma not being used to get Kasumi involved.
 * Red Baron: As in canon, Kuno's "Blue Thunder" nickname. This gets him mocked mercilessly by Akane.

""They call that... Jin... Jinrai...""
 * He adopted the title King of Heroes after Ranma casually referred to him by it.
 * Akane has become known as "The Worldwide Roadroller" thanks to "fucking" Kodachi with a steamroller
 * Rule of Funny: The story runs almost entirely on this and that other rule.
 * Rule of Three: During "The Third Sino-Japanese War" Arc, Kasumi is aware of this trope, and suspects a third tragedy is coming, far worse than the previous two (the first two being Ranma losing his memories of Akane and Gosunkugi assaulting Nabiki).
 * Running Gag: After a fight, Gosunkugi runs up to the loser and yells "You got knocked the fuck out!" in a reference to Friday.
 * Scooby-Dooby Doors: Ranma's the victim of this gag in chapter 5, after thanks to P-chan, he ends up getting chased by one angry mob.
 * Setting Update: The original series supposedly took place in the early 1990s. Interview clearly takes place in the Present.
 * Shipper On Deck: Nabiki shipped Kasumi and Dr. Tofu.
 * Shotgun Wedding:
 * Shout-Out: At least a few per chapter once things get going.
 * Ranma has a Newtype Flash just before Ryouga makes his first appearance.
 * Ranma finishes his fight with Ryouga with a flying kick from above that carries them both into a water fountain before jumping out of the ensuing geyser of water and landing in girl form. Akane, watching this, can only think to say:
 * Ranma finishes his fight with Ryouga with a flying kick from above that carries them both into a water fountain before jumping out of the ensuing geyser of water and landing in girl form. Akane, watching this, can only think to say:

"One girl spoke up. "They stole my scarf!"
 * Akane one-ups him in her match with Kodachi by quoting a few lines from Baran Doban's theme song while swinging Kodachi around like an Epic Flail.
 * That, AND she beat Kodachi with a Za Warudo impression, steamroller and all.
 * Kodachi's dialogue is almost line for line Ali al-Saachez's dialogue during Exia's first Trans-Am sequence when Akane goes all out.
 * "VIIIIIIIIITAAAAAAAAAAS!"
 * Three words: TANKER LORRY DA!
 * The sponsors for the match between Kodachi and Akane. Including Xanatos Enterprises, Kaiba Corporation, The Speedwagon Foundation and Stark Industries.
 * Black Lagoon has gotten some love, in the form of how Shampoo speaks, as well as being where she learned to be as ruthless.
 * In chapter 13, Mousse does Light Yagami's famous "potato chip" bit, and has a Light-style internal monologue. Considering who his English voice actor is, this makes sense.
 * There're a horde of shoutouts in Chapter 10's Dead Baby Comedy bit, and this is lampshaded right after that.
 * The montage scene in Chapter 14, as well as the song that goes with it, serves as shout out to the montage scenes in both Team America World Police and Mulan.
 * Shampoo's final attack is a nod to Ialdabaoth's Shinha Mougeki Reppa
 * In chapter 13, Cologne is mentioned as working with Takeshi Hongo, the first incarnation of Kamen Rider.
 * Chapter 20: "Everyone began filing into the school, now filled with despair that even Nozomu Itoshiki could not fathom."
 * From the same chapter, when Principal Kuno's goons start taking clothing that doesn't fit into the school uniform regulations:
 * From the same chapter, when Principal Kuno's goons start taking clothing that doesn't fit into the school uniform regulations:

Another cried. "And my earrings!"

A rather short, stout girl roared. "And my axe!""


 * When Ranma delivers a beating to Principal Kuno, he does it Kenshiro style.
 * In chapter 3, after Kuno declares his love for Ranma-chan, Ranma is so pissed, he delivers a damn good impression of a Shun Goku Satsu.
 * Shampoo listens to Lady Gaga
 * Chapter 21 has quite a few:
 * Ranma's cell phone has its ringtone the Sailor Moon theme song. "Beautfiul Destroyer Sailor Moon" chapter 14 reveals that Natalie Adams wrote the song after seeing the Senshi's heroism first-hand.
 * The line "Nobody dies when you kill them" is referenced a few times.
 * "That's a boat."
 * After Gosunkugi gets hit by a tugboat, Nabiki delivers a Horatio Caine one liner, complete with the sample of We Won't Get Fooled Again from her cell phone.
 * When Ranma and Ryoga are about to begin fighting in chapter 24, Akane yells "Are you daft, punk?"
 * Which is a double shout out. The first being, obviously, to the electronic band, but a slightly lesser known one is to Jo Jos Bizarre Adventure Abridged, which used the same line in the comment special. Given the other shout outs to JJBA, it's probably intentional.
 * Chapter 26 has several of note as well:
 * When Madame St. Paul revealed the M5, Kasumi was disappointed that it was just a cheap knockoff of another legendary male maid.
 * The opening the curry pot sequence for Ranma and Picolet's Fine Dining Duel is referred to as "FORMATION C!"
 * Split-Screen Reaction: Invoked in chapter 14 during the arrival of the Grand Master who will train the Kunos, Ryoga and Mousse, Donny fucking Osmond. Let's get down to business!
 * Stealth Pun: Occasionally throughout the fic, Ryouga alludes to a nasty incident in which he wound up in Osaka.
 * Took a Level In Badass: Everybody, especially SHAMPOO. The martial arts as a whole are taken Up to Eleven, and pretty much everybody could mop the floor with, or at least be equal to, canon!Ranma. Shampoo has More Dakka, Stuff Blowing Up, and is Nigh Invulnerable. Akane learns the Umisenken and absurdly sharp Razor Wind. Ryoga uses his rarely-seen bandanna-blades to great effect, uses his umbrella more (and more effectively) in his fighting style, and overall kicks more ass. He also . Mousse decides to declare Did You Think I Can't Feel?, , and says Let's Get Dangerous. Kuno gets Cool Shades which make him act normally, and actually decent fighting skills.
 * Training From Hell: Once again, The Golden Pair.
 * Tranquil Fury: Kasumi is the living embodiment of this trope; her fighting style of the "Gentle Sieve" is based entirely around bottling up emotions.
 * Traumatic Haircut: What Shampoo gave Akane after her hard fought win in their battle for Ranma.
 * The Unexpected: Vice-Principal Okamada from the the recent Broken Base making Live Action Adaptation.
 * Unresolved Sexual Tension: Averted in
 * Up to Eleven: Everything has been getting crazier and crazier since the introduction of Ryoga.
 * Wake Up Call Boss: The Golden Pair quickly shift from joke characters who will unquestionably be destroyed by Ranma and Akane, to pushing Ranma and Akane harder than anyone before.
 * Wham! Episode: Chapter 12, when
 * Chapter 15.
 * Chapter 23.
 * Wouldn't Hit a Girl: Directly invoked by Ranma, but only if they're crazy. Invoked by Azusa but immediately subverted.
 * Yamato Nadeshiko: Averted with Kasumi. She's actually a Stepford Smiler / Covert Pervert.
 * And a Retired Badass, starting from chapter 13.