Terminator (franchise)/Funny

"The Terminator: Fuck you, asshole."
 * The T-800's Dialogue Tree options to respond to the landlord complaining about the smell:

"On-looker: God daaaaamn!"
 * And shortly afterwards, the T-800 leaves his apartment in his iconic get-up and an assault rifle in one hand, prompting this reaction from an on-looker:

"John: Friend of yours? Terminator: He was my college roommate."
 * In T2 3-D: Battle Across Time , when the Terminator holds a fellow Terminator's head

"John: (in a phone booth) You got a quarter? T-800: (smashes bottom of payphone, quarters fall out)"
 * Sgt. Candy
 * "He's my Uncle Bob..."
 * "Talk to the hand".
 * After  "You're terminated, fucker!"
 * During T2, after John finds out  he asks him to stand on one leg. The scene follows with him standing on one leg whilst talking to some guys, until John quietly says "Put your leg down" out of the corner of his mouth. This troper finds that hilarious.
 * Seconded. He says it like such a mom to the tall robotic assassin.
 * John makes the Terminator promise that it will not kill anyone. The Terminator proceeds to shoot the guard in the kneecaps. "He'll live."
 * Minor scene from T1, the phone booth scene. The guy says the Terminator has an attitude problem, makes me lol every time.
 * "I need a vacation".
 * From Terminator 2:

"T-850: I am looking for John Connor. Kate: If I tell you where he is, will you let me go? T-850: Yes. Kate: He's in a cage in the back of the clinic. *T-850 begins to close the doors* Hey! You said you'd let me go! T-850: I Lied. *shuts and locks the door*"
 * T3 had a good one when Kate finally gets her hands on a gun and points it at the T-850, who, of course, is not concerned. In a panic, Kate pulls the trigger. The T-850 spits the bullet out of its mouth (revealing completely unscratched teeth), much to Kate's horror. The T-850 then just says: "Don't do that." and turns away.
 * This scene:

"Dr. Silberman: YOU BROKE MY ARM!!! Sarah Connor: There are 215 bones in the human body. That's one. Now don't move. Dr. Silberman: What are you gonna do?"
 * This troper has a poor ability in recognizing faces, but the cemetery scene's psychiatrist trying to calm Kate in T3 struck him as the same head of the asylum Sarah Connor was put in in T2. The funny bit was when he tried to assure Kate that it was just her minds playing trick regarding the Terminator.... But the moment he saw that exact same Arnold face he saw years ago in T2, he immediately bailed, as if saying "this is real!".
 * Yes, that was Dr. Silberman, the same character from the first two films.
 * More Hilarious in Hindsight than due to the movie itself, but the cops in the police station rationalize that the terminator was just some "guy on PCP." Given that it's the standard excuse for vampire related antics on Buffy the Vampire Slayer, you start to wonder if the Sunnydale PD got some transfers...
 * In the second movie, when the Connors are planning to flee to Mexico. The Terminator sees a baby, then picks it up and looks at it like he has no idea what it is.
 * For all the tension in the scene, the T-1000's Finger Wag is pretty darkly hilarious, especially combined with Sarah's facial expression. You can tell she's mentally going, "Seriously? Seriously?"
 * Sarah's initial escape from her ward can be considered both this and awesome.
 * First happens after she picks the lock. Dougie, a disgusting abusive orderly that licked her face while she was faking catatonia; returns to make his rounds. While he doesn't notice anything unusual regarding the rooms, he notices the janitorial closet door open. He looks and sees one of the broom handles has been snapped off. When he turns around to look for the broken piece, he spots a charging angry Sarah giving him that piece: Smacking it off his nose breaking it (Which happened to the actor in real life by accident ) and beating him to unconsciousness with it before stealing his club and keys. Then putting his body into her room on the ward.
 * Second she approaches one of the security rooms with Silberman and another orderly were checking on monitors. Sarah throws the keys to distract the orderly then knocks him out with the club. When Silberman tries to call for help, Sarah quickly dispatches him with the club on his arm and his leg keeping him subdued. This exchange happens when she prepares a syringe, by injecting the contents into the unconscious guard and using it to extract drain cleaner:

"Security Guard: Let's all try to remain calm. Sarah Connor: Open it or he'll be dead before he hits the floor. Security Guard: There's no way Connor let him go. Orderly: Take it easy Sarah. Easy. Dr. Silberman: It won't work Sarah, you're no killer. I don't believe you'll do it. Sarah Connor: You're already dead Silberman. You know that I believe it, so DON'T FUCK WITH ME!! Dr. Silberman: Open the door. OPEN THE DOOR!!!"
 * Third, she drags him to one of the main doors where more security and orderlies discovers Sarah holding Silbermen at Needlepoint, in an effort to convince them to open the door. And while there's some hesitation from the guards it works.


 * Fourth after they let her through she makes sure they are in no position to sound the alarm or restrain her. But as she gets clear of the door way and into the main hall, with her facing the previous door making sure no one comes out; another orderly manages to briefly attack her from behind. While it was pointless since Sarah was able to easily dispatch and knock him down, it gave Silberman an opening to escape and the security to sound the alarm. Which in turn alerts the T-1000, who just saw the orderly Sarah drugged struggling to get up from a combination of his previous beating and the drugs working through his system; to her location. She makes a mad dash towards the next locked doors using the keys to unlock the first door and lock it up before Silberman's group catches up with her. She then gets through another door, specifically one with bars on it, and uses it to her advantage to break the key into the lock once she locks that one. As a result we are given this hilarious reaction from the group when they try to open the second lock. (One of them clearly shouting "WHAT THE FUCK!!" when they realize she broke the key in there.) So they try to run around the other side of the hallway to catch up with her, while a sore and annoyed Silberman lugs behind not wanting to run anymore.
 * And Fifth while mostly Nightmare Fuel it's Hilarious in Hindsight in universe. She manages to make it to the elevators and would have been home free. Only to stop in her tracks when she sees a very familiar figure, a T-800, looking exactly like the one that tried to kill her in the first movie stepping out. Causing the brave Sarah to panic and run the other direction. Not knowing that this version is with John and assigned to protect him. Naturally she's caught and restrained by the group who finally catches up with her, ignoring her cries and stupidly ignoring the 6' Musclebound biker advancing on them until he throws them around like rag-dolls.