Blatant Lies/Anime and Manga

Neither Anime nor Manga have listed here.

"Gozaburo: Starting today, I'm taking over this "group." I'm the leader of this group. I'll scold whoever makes noise. Nice to meet you all. Class President: E-erm... What happened to the former teacher, Shibazaki-sensei? Gozaburo: Mr Shibazaki is .... On maternity leave! Students: Eh, he can give birth?!"
 * In Inuyasha, Kagome's long absences are explained by her Grandfather as being the result of various illnesses that are increasingly more and more serious, and which Kagome would not likely recover from so easily had she actually contracted them (such as diabetes, scoliosis and rheumatoid arthritis).
 * Worse, the parents of the boy who has a crush on her own an alternative medicines clinic, and he frequently brings her increasingly ridiculous herbal remedies and such. This is often how she learns of her grandfather's latest excuse for her absence.
 * Many of these are also geriatric disorders that the Grandfather likely has, like rheumatism.
 * In Ranma ½, all of the Miniature Senior Citizens claim to have been both normal-sized and very attractive when young (particularly the ultra-lecherous Happôsai and Lukkôsai, who claim to have been dignified, respected Bishonens). This is proven to be false in Happōsai's case (who was, basically, a homely little dwarf with the exact same standards as the present Happōsai) and is likely the same in Lukkōsai's case. Cologne, on the other hand, looks the same in both her and Happosai's flashback, so she's probably being honest.
 * Mahou Sensei Negima: The Mages Hand Wave things like people flying, shooting fireballs, or giant demon mecha with "It's CGI." And it works. This sort of makes sense during the festival arc where the Muggles were already using magic guns and the like, but there's no reason for it to work the time it showed up in the Kyoto arc.
 * This is the most likely excuse of
 * My-HiME: After the results of the Power Trio's first encounter with an Orphan, Reito comes to Mai the next day and tells her that they're reporting the collateral damage to the landscape as the result of "a (freak) lightning strike." Suuuure, Reito. Single lightning strikes that set the landscape ablaze in perfectly straight lines happen all the time.
 * The characters in Bleach use the injury and illness excuse for their long absences far too often. The fact that up to five of them are missing, all from the same high school class, at the same time makes the lies all the more blatant.
 * One of them is Orihime who doesn't even need to lie, since even when she tells the truth everybody assumes it's just her overactive imagination.
 * All of the main cast (Ichigo, Rukia, Orihime, Ishida, Chad) go into school. They explain their injuries with "I fell down some stairs." No one believes them, which is kind of understandable considering that Ichigo in particular tends to acquire lots of really impressive sword wounds.
 * We also have Shinji Hirako referring to each cute girl he meets as "his first love ever". Suuuuure.
 * Minako of Sailor Moon does the same thing during her own manga, Codename: Sailor V. Artemis doesn't buy it for a second.
 * Onsokumaru of Ninin ga Shinobuden is a floating yellow ball with arms, yet for some reason Shinobu believes him when he claims to be a hawk. This is just one of countless lies he manages to sell her on. Kaede is never fooled for a second.
 * Seto no Hanayome: Mafia boss Seto Gozaburo's introduction as the new homeroom teacher:

"Karen: Miina-san, your face looks scary. Miina: I was born like this. Karen: ...Is that right?"
 * Yamazaki of Cardcaptor Sakura gets his kicks improvising outrageous lies, usually about the history of things. Sakura and, strangely enough, Syaoran always believe him. Chiharu seems thoroughly jaded, but let Yamazaki talk long enough and even she will start to wonder...
 * Rozen Maiden's Suiseiseki takes full advantage of the fact that Hina-Ichigo will believe anything she's told. In one memorable case, she convinced Hina that mailboxes were dangerous monsters... purely so she could get her letter sent first.
 * About half of the dialog in Beelzebub are lies on way or another. Especially anytime Oga is describing himself, or well any other time it could get a laugh.
 * In Please Twins!, the trio gets a visit from Tsubaki, who's clearly interested in Maiku. Karen notices Miina [[media:maybeitsmaybelline 4664.jpg|glowering]].

"Madara: I didn't unleash the Kyuubi on Konoha, it was a Natural Disaster."
 * Naruto

"Hinata: AAAAAHHHHH YYYYYOOOOUUUUUU BIIIIIIIT- (scene change) Otonashi: Where's Hinata? Yurippe: He was a noble sacrifice."
 * Galaxy Angels Mint brings the staff of an amusement park to tears with her story of the deaths of Ranfa and Forte. They charged into a hail of bullets while she remained behind because of her powerful family. I almost burst into tears, then I remembered that Ranfa and Forte were back at base enjoying their coffee break.
 * Durarara!! has Orihara Izaya saying "No way! I'm not the bad guy!"
 * Madoka Magica: As much as you would want to believe that Kyubey is lying, he's not. He actually considers himself above lying, so he will always be obligated to tell the truth, although it's usually From a Certain Point of View. Gen Urobuchi, however, lies constantly, and reached legendary Troll status that way. Saying was the main character is just one example...
 * From Angel Beats!. After Otonashi has to grab Yurippe innappropriatly to climb up human ladder style and Hinata attempts the same thing:


 * Usopp of One Piece has many of these, the most famous probably being "I have 80 million men under my command!" The, ahem, more gullible members of the Strawhats and a few other idiots will actually take him seriously.
 * After the Live Alive concert in Haruhi Suzumiya, we can see Kyon wolf down his lunch in silence and then casually stroll out of the classroom and declares that it's not that he wants to talk to Haruhi about the concert or anything, he just took a walk to settle his stomach. The narrator is blatantly lying to the viewer!
 * In Mayo Chiki, Kanade is a master at this. She tells Kureha, the main character Jiro's sister, that Subaru is in fact a guy in episode 3. Later, in episode 7, Subaru is wearing a bikini and looks like a girl when Kureha once again shows up. Kanade blatantly points out that she's a girl, and is in fact Subaru's "cousin", Punyuru. Kureha once again falls for it.
 * In The World God Only Knows during an obvious breather arc, Keima gets upset about losing a shogi match and tries to pretend he meant to do it as part of his strategy. The girl he's working on, Nanaka, then points out that he has Ocular Gushers going on, at which point he claims he's not crying, he's relaxing in a hotspring! Complete with an image of him filling up a hot spring with his tears.
 * No Panties White Base, a Porn Parody (the rare one to put more than token effort into the "parody" part) of the original Mobile Suit Gundam opens with a one page comic of Noa Bright (19) asking every important member of the White Base crew if they're over 18 to establish it's totally an alternate universe where that is true. He starts with Amuro Ray, who turns 16 in the middle of the original series, who confirms he is over 18. He then moves on to Sayla Mass, Ryu Jose, Mirai Yashima, and Kai Shiden who are all legitimately exactly 18 years old. Bright then asks Hayato Kobayashi (15, clearly younger than the rest of the cast) who insists "I turned 18 a couple of days ago." Then, to dispel any doubts this strip is anything other than a joke, Kikka, Letz, and Katz (4, 6, and 8) all declare in unison "We're over 18!!!" Bright then takes this as an opportunity to exclaim "I can now declare that this ship's crew are all over 18!!" To enhance the absurdity, Amuro is the only character under 18 to appear in the actual work anyways!