Hatchetfield

Hatchetfield is a franchise from the American theater troupe Team Starkid. It covers strange happenings in a mysterious Midwest town, with alternate timelines, musical numbers and a lot of f-bombs to boot.

Nothing should happen in Hatchetfield. All it has is the Starlight Theater, a Beanie's Coffee with singing baristas, and a mall with the hottest toys in town. For some reason, however, Hatchetfield attracts several supernatural creatures, and apocalypses. Whether it's a Hive Mind turning people into singing zombies, or a persuasive Eldritch Abomination posing as a plush toy, you can bet that the world will end thanks to what starts in this town. Expect your favorite characters to die. A lot. But that's okay, because a new timeline or continuity starts in each show! And maybe, one day, the characters will find their happy ending or save the multiverse. Both would be ideal, to save everyone regardless of the timeline.

The franchise has several works: stage musicals The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals, Black Friday, and the musical web series Nightmare Time. Nerdy Prudes Must Die is a work-in-progress, meant to close out the stage musical trilogy. Thanks to the pandemic, however, it took two years for a trailer of Nerdy Prudes to come out, promising a February 2023 release date. See the trailer here.


 * Adaptational Jerkass: In the Nightmare Time segments, Grace Chastity seems meaner than she is when mentioned in Black Friday and The Guy Who Didn't Like Musical. It just seems that Grace is a little overbearing and a "nerdy prude" according to other characters. In "Perky's Buds", she leads protests against Emma and Ziggy for their business while in "Abstinence Camp", she regularly tattles on Stephanie for her sarcasm.
 * Adult Fear:
 * Bill, no matter the timeline, is shown to be in a bitter custody battle with his ex-wife over his teenage daughter Alice. Seventeen-year-old Alice, college-bound in a year, seeks a career in the arts and resents that Bill keeps trying to be a goofy Bumbling Dad when she needs someone to support her wholeheartedly. She also hates that Bill is right that her girlfriend Deb is not good enough for her, as Deb is a stoner who encourages Alice to play hooky and . Fortunately in "Watcher World,".
 * Charlotte Sweetly's in a loveless marriage with her husband Sam, who is a Dirty Cop that she knows is cheating on her. Sam refuses to comply with couples counseling and rarely comes home. She's cheating on him in turn, because Ted is the only source of comfort that she can find, and Black Friday hints that Ted really does have feelings for her but is too insecure to admit them..
 * Black Friday would run on this trope if not for the supernatural threat. A mall riot breaks out on the titular day, because every adult in line at the toy store wants the Tickle-Me-Wiggly. The survivors try to stay out of the bloodbath and hide from the obsessed Wiggly cultists, as.
 * "Honey Queen" has the villainous Linda and Gerald Monroe react this way when.
 * "Abstinence Camp" features this: it's basically a little despotism area where Boy-Jerry and Girl-Jerry rule with an iron fist. While Girl-Jerry has reason to panic about the slightest hint of debauchery and is terrified, Boy-Jerry actively.
 * "Hey Melissa" for most of its story has nothing supernatural. That's what makes it messed up, and you can see why it was never made into an official Nightmare TIme Epsidoe:
 * Initially, the danger comes from one of Paul's coworkers, a guy named Freddy that becomes obsessed with Melissa, Mr. Davidson's secretary, who is visibly crushing on Paul. That obsession becomes murderous. Paul tries to explain to Ted and Bill that he is not interested in Melissa that way because she likes cats, and she's not his type. Melissa is creeped out by Freddy and tells him that who she dates is none of his business. It doesn't matter to Freddy, who . Yeah it turns out
 * The way that Melissa screams at Paul for accidentally getting a dog he adopted killed. He says he was just a kid, but she yells about how he's not living up to the image of him that she had in his head of a nice guy that could do no wrong. Paul is naturally freaked out by this, but is too worried about Melissa's wellbeing to go away.
 * Apocalypse Maiden: Nightmare Time installments featuring Hannah reveal that in the wrong hands, her powers would make her this. There's clairvoyance and the ability to see the future, but when pushed she can also do mind control and telekinesis. That's partly why Webby takes it upon herself to provide Hannah guidance that her druggie mother and stressed sister can't; if one of Webby's siblings find a way to control Hannah, the world is more than likely to end. It's implied that Wiggly was trying to turn Hannah into this when talking to her in Black Friday and using an illusion of Ethan to make her succumb to despair; Hannah loudly rejects this role by saying that Ethan always told her to never give up, even in the worst of circumstances.
 * Asshole Victim: While not everyone in Hatchetfield deserves the multiple times they get killed on or offscreen, quite a few show it's hard to mourn for them:
 * Emma's boss Zoey is a diva actress and Mean Boss to her, while carrying on an affair with the married Sam Sweetly. While Emma is a crappy employee, complete with Flipping the Bird at customers and slacking off at work, Zoey is just as much of a slacker as shown in Nightmare Time. Emma also has a point that singing for tips means it's not really a tip, but earning twenty-five cents per song. "Honey Queen" goes further in showing that she.
 * Sam Sweetly is a Dirty Cop that cheats on his long-suffering wife Charlotte who knows that he's scum and cheating on him as well, but trying to make their marriage work. The Hive gets him early in The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals, owing to the fact that he was with Zoey at the Starlight Theater when the meteor hit. You're in fact cheering when sleazeball Ted bangs him with a traschan lid as a brainwashed Sam chases around a screaming Charlotte while brandishing a gun.
 * No one likes Linda Monroe or her husband Gerald, regardless of the timeline. She's snotty, controlling of her family, and implied to be a sociopath who buys her influence. Therefore, it's hard to mourn when . "Hive Queen" zigzags this when . Despite that, because.
 * It's zigzagged with in The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals. Sure neither of them are nice, per se, but
 * Bittersweet Ending:
 * "Killer Track": Thanks to Miss Holloway and Duke, the titular.
 * "Yellow Jacket": Lex uses.
 * Black Widow: It's revealed in "Daddy" that.
 * Bolivian Army Ending: How Black Friday ends; the survivors of the mall riot gather after hearing that World War III has started, and Russia will likely send a nuclear missile in retaliation for . They wait for midnight to strike before planning to bunker with Professor Hidgens. Hannah, however, has some hope; she sees a vision and sings that "Tomorrow will come, tomorrow won't come, tomorrow will come today." She asks what will happen if tomorrow does come, and what then? Tom asserts that if they make it past midnight on Black Friday, they can survive anything. All the survivors sing and hug, even Jerkass Ted and Charlotte. They count down the seconds to midnight, and see something in the sky. But there is hope, if not in this world then in the multiverse that General McNamara mentioned.
 * Brainwashed and Crazy:
 * Discussed about all those people who join the Hive in The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals? Professor Hidgens explains the Hive killed them and reanimated them as zombies, with memories of the people they were. Paul finds himself succumbing in the climax after inhaling spores from the meteor, fighting it the whole time..
 * Wiggly has a thrall over adults, but . Any adult in the vicinity of a Wiggly, with the exception of maybe Paul who finds the radio jingle annoying, starts wanting the toy by many means possible, and General McNamara that opts for shooting the nearest doll. It's seen most horrifyingly when Tom and Becky, shortly after being trapped in the mall movie theater, succumb to the thrall when seeing a frightened Hannah with a Wiggly that tries convincing her to sink into despair. She tries to reason with them, saying that Wiggly is a liar. It doesn't work, so Hannah has to hide. Tom only snaps out of it later when . Becky comes to her senses after.
 * Chekhov's Gun: In "Yellow Jacket," the reason why Lex doesn't believe that Webby is real is that Webby was her imaginary friend as a kid. She assumes that Hannah as a kid saw Lex talking to Webby, and picked up the habit..
 * Chekhov's Gag: Grace Chastity has the unfortunate label of being a "nerdy prude" in every continuity..
 * Come Out, Come Out, Wherever You Are: A brainwashed Becky and Tom sing this in "Do You Want to Play?" when they try to lure Hannah out of hiding to grab the Wiggly doll that she's holding. Becky hides a syringe behind her back as she and Tom walk through the audience aisles, complete with Tom jumpscaring a random audience member. Yes, it's as creepy as it sounds.
 * Cruel Twist Ending:
 * In The Guy Who didn't Like Musicals, it seems that despite everything,
 * "Hey Melissa!" seemingly ends with Paul rescued
 * A Day in the Limelight: Nightmare Time gets to focus on different characters featured in the musical:
 * "Watcher's World" narrows its focus to Bill and Alice as he drags his daughter to a theme park for a father-daughter bonding trip.
 * "Honey Queen" gives more insight into Linda and Gerald Munroe and they're Unholy Matrimony. We also see that Zoey is more than just a Mean Boss to Emma.
 * "Daddy" shows more depth in a timeline where Frank decides to marry Sherman Young's mother, to save his business. We see how Sherman became the way that he is thanks to his mother, and Frank becomes more sympathetic as, much to his shock, he becomes the Only Sane Man in the Young household.
 * "Yellow Jacket" focuses more on Ethan and Hannah's relationship as he tries to keep her from getting in over her head.
 * Downer Ending: Most of the entries in this franchise have this type of ending:
 * The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals: Paul
 * "Jane's A Car": Jane.
 * "Honey Queen": Linda succeeds in.
 * Eleven O Clock Number: In Black Friday, "What If Tomorrow Comes"] is this and the finale for the musical. Hannah gets her first solo in the musical, and her actress belts out that she can see the possibility of a tomorrow: "What if tomorrow comes, to break the dawn and take the night away?" The rest of the ensemble joins in, hope rising that they can survive the possibility of tomorrow.
 * Even Evil Has Standards: Linda's dad Mr. Murray is not a nice guy who constantly belittles her and turned her into the monster she is, but when he gets wind of the fact that she and Gerald have been sabotaging the competition to help her win the Honey Queen title. He warns Gerald that he does not want either his daughter or son-in-law to embarrass him..
 * Evil vs. Evil: "Honey Queen" pits Emma's Beanies manager Zoey against Linda Monroe as they try to get the namesake title from the Hatchetfield Honey Queen pageant. Both are revealed to fight dirty to get what they want, and at certain points, it's hard to know who to support..
 * The Fourth Wall Will Not Protect You:
 * The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals ends with Emma begging the audience for help during the curtain call.
 * In Black Friday, Tom and Becky walk into the audience while singing [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DaiG2LvywJE "Do You Want to Play" and hunting down Hannah, and Tom even screams at a random person. You can hear nervous laughter in the recorded stage version.
 * Freudian Excuse: "Daddy" reveals that Sherman Young is such a little creep and a Manchild because his mother spoils him rotten, treating him like a baby despite him being in his forties.
 * Generational Trauma: It's implied to be the reason why people become messed up, if there isn't a supernatural reason. Some of the Nightmare Time episodes show that you don't need supernatural beings to corrupt people; human beings are corrupt already. Jerkass and emotionally abusive Linda Monroe treats everyone like garbage (including her husband Gerald who loves her) because she's a backstabbing opportunist, and only favors her son River. Turns out her dad treats her exactly the same way, as "Honey Queen" reveals. She enters the Honey Queen pageant to win his approval, even as Gerald warns her that the senior Mr. Murray isn't worth it.
 * Gold Digger: A more sympathetic case; Frank Pricely is very open about the fact that he's marrying Sheila Young for her money, not to give her forty-one-year-old son a father, to save his toy shop where Sherman is a frequent customer. Sheila is emotionally abusive, and it's revealed that.
 * Hope Springs Eternal: How General McNamara snaps Lex out of the Darkest Hour in Black Friday after . He tells her that if she and her sister learn to control their powers, they can save the multiverse. Which means that even with the ambiguous ending for the musical, if Hannah and Lex manage to save Hatchetfield in one timeline, and there are multiple, then they can save all of them.
 * In Spite of a Nail: The timelines have some constant events that happen regardless of the different supernatural or human cruelty:
 * Bill's wife leaves him for another man and gets main custody of Alice. This backstory informs many of Bill's insecurities and guilt that he can't provide his daughter with a better life.
 * Professor Hidgens is obsessed with getting funding for his show Workin' Boys.
 * Becky Barnes dated Tom in high school, obtained a nursing degree and married an abusive man. Concurrently, both Emma Perkins and Linda Monroe share one thing in common: an Irrational Hatred of Becky. (Bonus points: Lauren Lopez plays both Emma and Linda.) Linda has no reason to pick on Becky except that the woman isn't scared of her and can't be bribed or blackmailed, and still has her perky cheerleader attitude. Emma's case may be more justified owing to Big Sister Instinct: it's confirmed Tom married her sister Jane in some timelines, and the town is convinced that Tom and Becky should have stayed together according to gossip in Black Friday. Emma does have a point that it's insulting people think her dead sister wasn't good enough for Tom.
 * Jane Perkins died in a car crash while her sister was world-hopping. Black Friday and some of the Nightmare Time stories confirm that her husband Tom was driving though he wasn't at fault; he wasn't able to react fast enough when another driver switched lanes and ploughed into the passenger side. It's ambiguous in The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals if Tom and Jane had married, considering Emma doesn't mention her nephew Tim or her brother-in-law, just that Jane died and Emma feels guilty that she kept putting off her return home.
 * Paul and Emma meet, and they fall in love, with "Perky's Buds" is the exception. What's more, despite both of them being misanthropes, they bring out the best in each other. "Forever and Always" lampshades this when.
 * Irrational Hatred: For some reason, Linda Monroe hates nurse Becky Barnes. In Black Friday, she taunts Becky when the latter fails to raise righteous fury about Linda cutting her way in line, saying that the perky cheerleader attitude doesn't work when she's an adult.
 * Kick the Dog: For once, in "Daddy", Ted didn't do anything to deserve it..
 * Kick the Son of a Bitch: In "Honey Queen," it should be cruel about the way that the senior Mr. Murray . Thing is, it's Linda.
 * Lesser of Two Evils: How "Abstinence Camp" ends; while the campers aren't thrilled that, Pete and Steph go with it because.
 * Mama Bear: It only shows up in the second season of Nightmare Time, but.
 * The Mindless Almighty: Some of the malevolent beings in Hatchetfield are this, which is good for the human inhabitants trying to survive in the various timelines. They can then take advantage of the childlike or wild tendencies to retaliate.
 * In Black Friday, if the Wiggly brainwashing gets to the adults, they attain both powers and a strong desire to kill for a Tickle-Me-Wiggly doll. Some, as a result, become irrational. In an ironic case of this, sociopathic Linda Munroe is recruited by Uncle Wiley to serve as the prophet for the Cult of Wiggly.
 * Blinky in "Watcher's World" wants the theme park residents to adore him, and for the Snigglys to be happy. Anyone who hates Blinky or speaks up about the unfair Sniggly conditions may find themselves near-beaten to death or hunted down like prey. That's because it depowers him..
 * Mistaken for Murderer: In "Abstinence Camp," Steph and Pete.
 * No Good Deed Goes Unpunished: In "Hey Melissa," Paul breaks it gently to Melissa that he's not interested in her, not the least because he's been interested in the coffee girl Emma and dating your coworker is awkward. This is after he rescued her from . When she expresses interest in who he really is, Paul ignores a call from Emma and decides to open up to comfort her. This little action and moment of vulnerability.
 * Not What It Looks Like: Counselors Boy-Jerry and Girl-Jerry try to say this when.
 * Obnoxious In-Laws: Played with between Emma and Tom in Black Friday. They don't necessarily get along, but both are grieving Jane's death, and Emma hugs him the way a little sister would for a big brother. Emma at first is annoyed when Tom is going to the mall on Black Friday under the pretext of buying some carpentry tools rather than spending time with her and his son Tim; she softens when Tom tells her in secret that he's buying his son a Christmas present. The musical ends with her and Paul arriving in a hurry to the mall, relieved to see Tom, and she admits she was scared he was dead.
 * Only Sane Man: There are a few depending on the story. Jon Matteson plays a handful of them:
 * Paul in The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals remains cynical, immune to the Hive's machinations, and insightful about the danger everyone is in from the singing zombies. It's why the Hive in interested in converting him..
 * Gerald in "Honey Queen" tries talking his wife out of trying to get affection from her father. He says that if he weren't a gentleman he would deck the senior Murray for how little he cares about his only daughter. What's more, his method of helping her sabotage her competitors is technically fair: he doesn't schedule collagen appointments for one woman, and doesn't make Zoey sing at the coffee shop, only tips her a few hundred dollars and pretends to be a Broadway producer's assistant. As Linda smugly tells Zoey, she was an idiot for believing that a Broadway producer would screen for girls at a coffee shop.
 * Much to his shock, Frank Pricely becomes this in "Daddy". When he marries Sheila Young to get her funds to save the store, he actually tries to parent Sherman. It doesn't go well, but A for effort.
 * Likewise, Ethan cannot believe that he has to serve as Hannah's conscience in "Yellow Jacket" when they get roped into doing superpower fights for money, after she gets into an accident in shop class. He tries to keep Hannah out of the worst of it, while drumming up the courage to tell Lex. Hannah pushes forward because she is happy to have friends, and to be able to give her sister a good home. As Ethan puts it, he's the irresponsible one, and not a person with good judgment.
 * Only Sane Woman:
 * Emma in The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals thinks that she is this, with how she kvetches about the new "Singing for a Tip" mandate. In reality, she's actually a Jerkass venting about her wasted life and sister's death on an unfair working situation. While she gets better as the singing apocalypse starts to happen, it's not enough to save her.
 * In Black Friday, while Lex steals a Tickle-Me-Wiggly from her boss's shop, she resists the thrall of Wiggly when the toy talks to her. Her intention is to sell the doll online so she and Ethan have enough money to take Hannah with them to California and start a new life. Throughout the whole show, she registers the danger of the situation when the store riot starts, doing her best to get out of dodge while her boss stupidly tries to demand all the fighting customers leave. . "Yellow Jacket" takes this further when,.
 * In "Honey Queen", the poor pageant volunteer is the only person not drawn into the vicious competition that Zoey and Linda start. She just reminds Zoey to not be late for rehearsal and tells them every contestant needs a talent.
 * In "Abstinence Camp," Steph is the only person who realizes the camp is stupid and the rules are arbitrary. She figures out how to bust herself and Pete out of solitary confinement-- using an axe, and . While she later agrees that.
 * Out-of-Genre Experience: "The Hatchetfield Ape-Man" compared to most of the urban horror of "Nightmare Time" plays out like a love letter to Gothic literature. You have a British heiress investigating a beast with a Mad Scientist manipulating her, and an aura of mystery about the woods around the manor.
 * Papa Wolf:
 * Bill will defend his daughter Alice a face monsters to save her.
 * Gerald in "Honey Queen".
 * Pet the Dog: At the end of "Honey Queen," Linda leaves a heartfelt voicemail on her husband's phone, saying she loves him and thanks to him for believing in her.
 * Properly Paranoid: Emma hates her manager Zoey in The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals, saying that she and the manager are self-absorbed divas that only care about their acting careers. "Honey Queen" reveals that Zoey is an uber-competitive actress who uses emotional blackmail and entitlement to get what she wants.
 * Redemption Equals Death: This happens during a few Nightmare Time episodes:
 * In "The Hatchetfield Ape-Man,".
 * "Honey Queen" has.
 * The Stool Pigeon: In "Abstinence Camp," Stephanie calls out Grace Chastity for being this, telling on her wanting to "shower" with Pete. She says that Grace may have good intentions, but she's a "nerdy prude".
 * Toe-Tapping Melody:
 * In The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals, Beanie's manager Zoey makes her employees do a new tip song. Emma is not into it, having to sing and dance for fifty cents, but doesn't want to get fired. While she's unenthusiastic, the coffeeshop patrons sans a very terrified and confused Paul enjoy the music. That is, until the patrons take a sip of their fresh coffee, choke, and collapse to the ground as the music becomes menacing when Emma threatens to quit. Turns out the singing zombies got to Nora and Zoey, and they poisoned the coffee with "blue shit" that turns everyone who drank it into a singing zombie.
 * Later in the same show, Professor Hidgens plays his demo songs of Workin' Boys to a . While Emma is practically crying with frustration because, Ted bobs along and asks Professor Hidgens to hit them with another song.
 * "Honey Queen" has Linda and Gerald Monroe use a few hundred dollars and the Homeless Guy to get Zoey to belt at her coffeeshop job, by stuffing her "Tip For A Song" jar. Apparently Zoey fires up the whole coffeeshop in her attempts to impress who she thinks is a Broadway producer. Only problem is she blows out her voice and can only croak the next day, just as the talent show is starting.
 * Token Good Teammate: There are a handful of benevolent supernatural entitles that help the protagonists rather than try to kill them:
 * Webby is revealed to be Hannah's Not-So-Imaginary Friend that tries to give her advice to stay out of danger. In Black Friday, Webby warns Hannah to not trust Wiggly when he starts talking through her via the toy in the backpack that Lex convinces her to smuggle out of the small. When Hannah points this out, Wiggly calls Webby "a little bitch!" confirming that she's real. In "The Witch in the Web",.
 * The is confirmed to be Good All Along. Lucy is in love with the Ape-Man because he saved her life as a child; Hidgens doesn't know if it was a real man or a hobo that didn't shave, but he's willing to make a buck off her fascination. In the climax of "The Hatchetfield Ape-Man,".
 * Villainous Rescue: Against all odds,.
 * Villains Out Shopping: Rather the Wild Card Professor Hidgens does nothing chaotic or villainous during "Honey Queen", leaving room for Zoey and Linda to fight. Granted, he is finally given the means to relive his dream when Linda offers to sponsor "Working Boys" the way that he intends if he helps her win.
 * Weaksauce Weakness: Owing to his upbringing,.
 * Wham! Shot: Has a few in its onstage musicals:
 * The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals
 * Act one already hints that something is wrong when a musical number starts on the streets, though Paul reasons after talking with Ted that it might have been a flash mob. Then Paul's boss summons him into his office and Paul assumes it's because of the reports he forgot to deliver the previous day. As Paul starts to explain himself, Mr. David lowers his newspaper to face him, with a Slasher Smile and starts to sing as well, asking "What do you want, Paul?" That's when Paul realizes that something really weird is going on in town.
 * "Cup of Poison Coffee" follows this up with all the Beanies' patrons sans Paul collapsing and choking after they drink their coffee. Emma goes to check on the pot, pulling out weird blue shit. Cue everyone standing up and singing in unison and pointing at Paul and Emma. They run for it before the song finishes.
 * Black Friday
 * The mall riot. It starts when a man panics and takes the Tickle-Me-Wiggly from Frank Pricely's front counter. Then everyone starts fighting for the toy, as Lex has the sense to run and Frank tries to steal it back and ban the customers.
 * The President of the United States bravely enters the Black and White to reason with Wiggly. He meets Uncle Wiley, who gives a Breaking Speech about how America's capitalism made it easy for Wiggly to spread his influence. It's then revealed the decorations on stage are actually tentacles for Wiggly and he's been watching us the whole time!