Families at War

Funky British variety meets game show hosted by comedians Vic Reeves and Bob Mortimer, where two families compete in performances of their respective talents (or in some cases, a task forced on them by the hosts) to earn points from a panel of 12 judges.

The part where it really got good was the bonus round, The Cubiscus, where the host who was rooting on the winning team is dressed up like a spider and the latter plays the spider's piano player, and the family members must manipulate him around a giant cube in order to make him grab prizes off pedestals and deposit them down a chute and ramp. It's much funnier than it sounds.

The show only lasted one series on BBC One in 1999.


 * Bonus Round: The Cubiscus. Guide The Spider around using four control ropes operated by each family member to grab prizes off pedestals (preferably while not knocking them over) and take them out of the cube. Kinda like a human UFO Catcher, or something like that.
 * Personnel
 * Game Show Host: Vic Reeves and Bob Mortimer
 * Lovely Assistant: Alice Beer

"Alice: Who is the spider? Vic: I AM THE SPIDER! Alice: Who is the spider's keyboard player? Bob: I AM THE FRESHWATER SHRIMP!"
 * Catch Phrase: "I am the spider!"
 * Catchphrase Spouting Duo: The hosts in the Cubiscus:


 * Over-the-Shoulder Carry: On a treadmill. With a famous British singer to boot! For a whole song. Stephen Greaves had records for running distances carrying weights, so this was no biggy ... for him anyway