Improbable Weapon User



""Here's a riddle: When is a Croquet Mallet like a billy club? I'll tell you: Whenever you want it to be.""

- Cheshire Cat', American McGee's Alice

The high probability your wackiest party member, like the Team Pet, will use some sort of bizarre and, well, improbable "weapon" -- that is, in the sense of an object you could conceivably hit something with. And some of these 'weapons' don't even go that far.

This usually seems to just be a way to give that character some sort of upgradeable item to explain ongoing power increases. Curiously, every weapon shop will sell these upgrades, despite there being seemingly only one such user on the planet.

Many games also have a gag weapon for each of the party members, which is essentially an Improbable or Nerf Arm version of their regular weapon, such as a Paper Fan of Doom for the sword-wielder, a broom for the White Magician Girl, or a squeaky-mallet for someone who normally wields an axe or hammer. Of course, this might end up subverted with an Infinity Plus One Marshmallow Slingshot.

This trope is surprisingly not that far from reality when you consider how martial arts weapons have included not just spears, swords, and knives, but farming tools, boat oars (see also Miyamoto Musashi), fans, metal rings (no, not even chakram, just round metal rings), and... small wooden benches? Hell, this doesn't even go into the army's trench shovel or some of crazier weapon combinations from about the 17th to early 20th century (brass knuckle knives, ax pistols, and flintlock cutlery).

Note: Many "improbable weapons" can indeed cause significant damage. Examples of these are:
 * frying pans,
 * shovels (most notably trench shovels, as mentioned above),
 * a solid mass of frozen food (giving a whole new meaning to Lethal Chef),
 * bed warmers,
 * scissors,
 * rolling pins,
 * clothes or cloths,

and so on. Anything that's heavy or sharp (well, sharp and over a certain size), really.

This may be one of the stranger examples of Truth in Television. For one-time examples see Improvised Weapon. If someone manages to pull this off with an actual weapon see Improbable Use of a Weapon.

See also This Banana Is Armed, Trick Arrow, Nerf Arm, Killer Yoyo, Parasol of Pain, Rings of Death, the aforementioned Paper Fan of Doom, the aforementioned Frying Pan of Doom and Rolling Pin of Doom, Throw the Book At Them, Instrument of Murder, The Death Dealer, Battle Tops, and the silliest of them all, the Musical Assassin. Compare Martial Arts and Crafts, Joke Item and Lethal Joke Item. See also Abnormal Ammo.

Anime and Manga

 * In Bludgeoning Angel Dokurochan, Zakuro wields the deadly and powerful wet towel Eckilsax.
 * The Tokyo Mew Mew girls have a habit of using these. Mew Lettuce, the worst offender, has a pair of castanets, though at least she shoots water from them. Mew Pudding has tambourines can that rend the earth and encase a target in jello, and Mew Ichigo has a pink heart-shaped bell that shoots out waves of sparkly healing power (the remaining two team members, Mew Mint and Mew Zakuro, use the more reasonable bow-and-arrow and whip, respectively).
 * Cure Lemonade from Yes! Precure 5 also uses castanets, which is odd, because her teammate, Cure Mint, is an Expy of Mew Lettuce.
 * Several anime have characters who use yo-yos as weapons; while this is not as implausible as it sounds (according to popular legend, yo-yos were in fact weapons originally), it nonetheless stretches things when they have explosive yo-yos, which can go off several times without being destroyed themselves... Probably the most spectacular example of this weapon is the Robot Romance classic Combattler V, a friggin' GIANT ROBOT that wields yo-yos with blades that slice enemies like a rotary saw.
 * Yo-yos are just the beginning. If you're a sukeban, you've got to have a "signature" weapon. Examples include bicycle chains, cup-and-ball toys, bamboo umbrellas, guitar picks (shuriken style), billiard balls, and even a bowling ball carried by one really enormous schoolgirl.
 * Read or Die. Some people use paper fans. And then there's Yomiko Readman, who uses just plain paper.
 * There are a number of characters in the various Read or Die/Dream canons who can use paper as weapons called Paper Masters. There's also a character in the Read or Die manga who wields giant matches. And later on another character wields a giant protractor.
 * Nicholas D. Wolfwood, the secondary hero in the Anime/Manga Trigun could be seen as the king of the unusual weapons. He, a gun-toting, hard-drinking (apparently Catholic) priest, uses a cross called "The Punisher" as his signature weapon. A cross six feet tall, three feet wide and made of steel. The common version of the cross has one of the "arms" housing six automatic pistols on a rack, the "foot" housing a machine gun that would fit on a helicopter, the other "arm" holding ammo for this gun, and the "head" holding a recoilless anti-tank missile launcher. It's heavy because "it's full of mercy(alternately, God's love)". Yeah, right.
 * Nicholas's teacher, Chapel the Evergreen, also wields a cross/weapon (which fans call "Neo-Punisher"). His splits into twin miniguns.
 * Midvalley the Hornfreak will jazz you to death with his killer saxophone.
 * Rai-Dei the Blade proves that Katanas Are Just Better by hiding a gun in the hilt of his sword.
 * A handful of gun-based weapons really make no sense.
 * The minor villain Cho from Rurouni Kenshin has a whole collection of strange swords, including one that is several feet long and so thin it can be waved around like some sort of razor-sharp ribbon (this is an actual type of weapon, called Urumi).
 * One of Berserker's Noble Phantasms in Fate/Zero allows him to pick up anything and turn it into a Noble Phantasm-rank weapon. This includes random columns of concrete and other Servants' Noble Phantasms, at one point Dual-Wielding a spear and an axe. And lest we forget, an F-15J. When the jet crashed, he ripped off the entire M61 Vulcan unit and fired it from the hip. In mid-air. Finally, he went Guns Akimbo with a pair of MP5K's. In fact, when he finally took out his 'true' Noble Phantasm, it turned out to be a sword - the least outlandish weapon he ever used.
 * Haruko, Naota and Atomsk from FLCL all utilize electric basses (and a guitar) to great effect. Electric guitars are apparently the weapon of choice for extraterrestrials. They're also used as baseball bats.
 * Panther Claw head Hiromi Tanaka from Cutie Honey The Live, in addition to having a stomach that can shoot missiles, uses frozen seafood as a weapon of choice. I swear!
 * Some of the Exorcists in D.Gray-man have Innocences that are shaped like ordinary weapons, like a katana or a hammer, but most of them are very strange. We've seen characters with acupuncture needles, pendulums, soccer balls, and what looks like harp strings.
 * Violinist of Hameln has most of the characters fighting with musical instruments. The main character uses (guess what) a gigantic violin, his friend Raiel plays a solid-gold grand piano, and his sister Sizer wields a Sinister Scythe with a flute imbedded in the handle (though to be fair she actually makes more use of the scythe part; her flute is mostly used to summon the Valkyries). Of course, the results are pretty awesome, but still.
 * More amusingly, the series protagonist (Hamel) has been known to throw Flute (and his other allies) at enemies as a form of attack.
 * He also occasionally throws his instrument, though this rarely turns out well.
 * Kaiba in Yu-Gi-Oh! throws cards as a weapon, shield, or gun jammer, and uses a briefcase like a guillotine in the manga. Duke Devlin sometimes throws his dice with devastating results against Faceless Goons.
 * Spoofed in the beginning of this Abridged episode of 5D's, where Jack throws his card at Yusei from atop an elevated highway. Yusei not only catches it, but throws it up right back to him.
 * Respoofed in the  where Yusei tosses Jack a card while both of them are riding their D-wheels at 60 mph.
 * In Yu-Gi-Oh! GX, Amon and Ekou both use explosive cards whose effect read as instructions on how to detonate it.
 * GaoGaiGar's "Driver" weapon series (Dividing, Gatling and Bolting) are apparently giant, space-warping hardware tools. Meanwhile, HyoRyu, EnRyu, and their combined form ChouRyuJin use the ladder and crane of their alt-modes as giant tonfas. FuuRyu and GekiRyuJin fire energy missiles from the churner of a cement mixer. Big Volfogg uses a motorcycle's exhaust pipes as a machine gun. And then there's Mic Sounders...
 * Speaking of HyoRyu and EnRyu, they also have the Pencil Launchers, and ChoRyuJin can use the Eraser Head. They are as silly as they sound.
 * And of course, The Captain Koutarou Taiga's preferred weapon is consistently a golf club. Even when he puts on his ID Suit. He even calls the attack.
 * TITANIUM HEAD DRIVER!!!
 * GetBackers. Perfume, mirror fragments, thread, needles, and cloth seem to be the worst offenders. The "poison perfume" is justified by some kind of magic, but... thread. In practice, it's pretty Badass (at least in the manga), but...
 * In the manga they were not threads but harp wires. Slightly more believable as weapons, but still unique.
 * Busou Renkin has plenty of these. Exploding fun balls, Tokiko's leg-blades, and many more.
 * Many of the characters in Blade of the Immortal use weapons that look incredibly cool... until you start asking questions about how they'd work in reality. The creator, Hiroaki Samura, hung a lampshade on this with the "Samura's Weapon Shop!" feature, which explains all the weapons, including the ones that don't make any sense. Examples: two sickles connected by an expansible chain ("The chain fits into one of the scabbards, and can stretch out to about seven feet. Whether this is good for anything is another question entirely."), a blade with little curved hooks on both edges ("What the hell is this thing? Don't ask me."), and two blades so narrow they look like kitchen skewers ("To be perfectly honest, I wonder why he doesn't just use a normal sword..."). Later, the sadistic Shira, who's, makes up for this by (warning: squicky)   It works about as well as you might expect.
 * Surprisingly, these examples work in real life: the chain-and-sickles is a variation of the traditional Japanese Kusari-gama, also used by Guilty Gear X's Axl(in the same two-sickle formation); the hooked blade can be justified by the additional damage caused by ripping action of the hooks upon cutting (the jagged edges of the wound heal slower), in the same fashion as soldiers who used to saw teeth into their bayonet blades; as for the narrow sword, almost all swords from the renaissance onwards were very thin, flexible blades, useful for only their stabbing action (they could only inflict superficial cuts, nothing like a medieval claymore).
 * Hagi's signature weapon in Blood Plus is his cello case.
 * A cyborg assassin in Ghost in the Shell: Stand Alone Complex uses a gun implanted in her right arm that fires coins. Just how it manages to shoot rolls of coins in a way that would make a SPAS-12 combat shotgun green with envy is never explained. The reason why she chose that particular and weird weapon can be imagined, though; she appears to have distinctly anti-capitalist principles, so the coin shotgun must be her idea of irony.
 * Pics! Unfortunately only dimes fit right in a 12 ga. and they are a bit light to do much at distance, but it works in theory.
 * Reborn. First there's Joshima Ken, who uses different sets of teeth to adopt the abilities of different animals. Kakimoto Chikusa who uses yo-yos that shoot out poisoned needles. M.M who uses a clarinet that, when played, creates special sound waves that cause the substance the clarinet is aimed at to boil instantly, which is called 'Burning Vibrato'. Levi who uses umbrellas that discharge electricity. Bianchi who specializes in poison cooking. I-Pin who enhances her martial arts skills with special gyoza dumplings laced with garlic, which numbs the brain and forces the victim's muscles to involuntarily move on their own. Uh, yeah...
 * Tsuna's woolly mittens. Hibari's handcuffs to the list. Gamma's pool cues, Lancia's giant flail which can utilize air currents to inflict more damage as well, Shamal uses mosquitoes and come on, Kikyou using freaking flowers.
 * Not to forget Lambo's electric cow horns,  metal fans, Vongola IV's fork. Amano really has a thing for unusual weapons.
 * And now we have  playing cards as well,
 * If you don't think a blanket woven out of the strongest metal in the world, or being able to use your blood as a weapon is improbable, then you've got no idea. Black Cat indeed features some improbable weapons.
 * Metal Armor Dragonar features one of the strangest sniper weapons in any Real Robot anime series: The Caulking Gun. To elaborate, it fires a shell that penetrates Humongous Mecha armor, then proceeds to inject a fast-hardening foam substance that damages computer systems, destroys circuit conductivity, and for the very unluckiest of victims, suffocates the pilots by filling the cockpit. Particularly effective since every robot in the series can fly, and is usually doing so.
 * Dr. Black Jack has been known to use scalpels as weapons.
 * Outlaw Star has Grappler ships (including the titular ship). Ships with arms. That tend to use giant, EVA-style knives. And similar melee weapons, including axes. And oversized handguns. And let's not forget about the assassin and crew member Twilight Suzuka, who is a master of the bokken (a wooden sword, normally used for training or situations where lethal force is inadvisable) that would make Tatewaki Kuno green with envy. Not only is her bokken the weapon she dispatches her quarry with, but she is so skilled with it that she can smash massive craters in solid stone and steel from a distance with a single swipe of her sword (using this on the roof to escape in her debut episode) and cut a bus cleanly in half with a single vertical swipe.
 * Speaking of Tatewaki Kuno, he probably counts somewhat towards this trope, due to the fact he is capable of cutting through concrete and trees in a single swipe, as well as thrusting so fast that the air pressure can shatter a statue. In the world of Ranma One Half, however, he pales compared to the other characters who show up. As this is the anime that gave us Martial Arts and Crafts, it naturally has an equally bizarre and improbable array of weapons for martial artists to use.
 * In the main characters alone, Kodachi (gymnastics ribbon) and Happosai (pipe) are the most obvious, but Mousse (who throws everything bar the kitchen sink) is close behind. Ryoga and Shampoo are honorary members of this trope; the former used his bandannas as projectile weapons, as well as his belt as a sword in the very early series (but gave them up- though he continues to use his umbrella as a short staff and projectile weapon) and the latter uses a real weapon in the form of her chui (the basketballs on short staves), though one that's almost never seen in the real world (those oversized heads? Solid steel. These days, you're only likely to see hollow replicas).
 * Mousse may not use a Kitchen sink but he has used a swan shaped toilet on more then one occasion.
 * The oddest weapons, however, tend to be seen by the minor characters- and the anime outdoes the manga in this regard. Who can forget Sotatsu Jikei'ien, who wields ink, paper, and a calligraphy brush the size of a man? Or Tamari Kaminarimon, who uses tops, hacky-sacks, thread and a kendama as weapons, and can presumably also use playing cards and marbles like her fellows do? And what about Prince Kirin, who uses chopsticks and rice?
 * Can't forget the school of Martial Arts Tea Ceremony.
 * Ranma Saotome is the most improbable weapons user, since he will grab anything in arm reach and use it as a weapon. Examples: Pinwheels, paper fans, pencils, boulders, tennis rackets, spoons, bras, chopsticks, brooms, rocks, tables, etc...
 * But we forget Ukyo, who cooks at high speeds and uses Okonomiyaki batter as liquid cement, and uses a relative of the spatula as her main weapon. Also, if it breaks, it is her Berserk Button.
 * While Kodachi's usage of gymnastics equipment is pretty strange, her skill with Instant Knots allows her to make some truly bizarre impromptu flails. Like using her own brother as a bludgeoning weapon -- the anime even had the announcer declaring that it was fortunate for her that brothers were a legal weapon in the tournament.
 * One Piece should be a chief offender of this trope, as characters have used spinning tops, perfume, a saxophone, balloons, paint, ramen, and even clouds. And let's not even get into some of the weapons the characters make with their Devil Fruits.
 * Covering opponents in soap. Exploding boogers. Cola farts. Actual ropes tied into knots, plus knives tied into some of the ropes.
 * Many of the O-Parts in 666 Satan qualify, especially Futomomotaro's Mackerel Sword which is even weirder than it sounds: it's a rigged mackerel with a hook for a handle that can release methane gas.
 * In Ashita no Nadja, Sylvie uses a parasol as a sword, and Grandma Anna loves to swing her frying pan around.
 * In Speed Grapher Saiga uses his photographic camera as a weapon.
 * Actually it's He doesn't realise that at the beginning though.
 * The Law of Ueki's sequel runs on this trope. Among the weapons found are mops, hair dryers, a suitcase full of money and a washing machine.
 * Jo Jos Bizarre Adventure. Bubbles. Spinning, shining, razor-sharp, deadly vampire-slaying soap bubbles. What.
 * And his grandfather uses wine the same way.
 * Later in Part 5, we have Pesci's stand Beach Boy. It's a fishing rod. He manages to make it VERY lethal.
 * Everyone in Hunter X Hunter. To name a few, there's bank interest, gum, a dart board, a vacuum cleaner, a giant pipe and a fishing rod (used by the main character, no less). All of which are put to serious good use, like fighting giant ants bent on world domination.
 * It goes both ways: The aforementioned dartboard is a weapon of one of the ants. Other weapons that don't have their own tropes include a cell phone, fleas shot from a sniper rifle, a book (its text, not as a blunt object), needles, teleporting gorillas, a volleyball, one's own detached fingertips, a tiny floating birdcage, a surfboard, planet Jupiter, explosive mosquitoes, a slot machine staff, and an entire savannah the user can transport to the immediate area.
 * Rozen Maiden much? Okay, they're dolls, but still, Souseiseki charges at people armed with a pair of giant scissors, and when forced into melee Suiseiseki whacks people with a watering can.
 * One Quirky Miniboss Squad from Berserk uses torture tools as weapons. These include pliers used to pluck out peoples eyes, saws, some sort of grappling hook, a restraining device mounted on a long pole, and a massive wheel. Also, Ganishka's demon soldiers wield bizarre looking horn things that are used sort of like spears.
 * Durarara: Shizuo's trademake weapons are street signs and vending machines. Also, Mikado and Izaya, to a lesser extent, both get honorable mentions for harnessing the awesome power of the internet and unleashing it on their unsuspecting enemies.
 * Seiji. He managed to stab a PEN into Heiwajima Shizuo and Shinra's destroyed some of his best scalpels operating on him.
 * Izaya uses a switch-blade...
 * Sui the Blood Knight from Double Arts uses a hoop as her signature weapon,which folds up to fit behind her back. She calls it Avis. It is,however,made out of solid iron.
 * In Soul Eater, Kim Diehl uses a lantern as her Weapon. The aptly named Jackie (Jacqueline Dupree) manages to combine flying broom, flamethrower, and explosive device in one improbable, manically grinning package.
 * Justin Law also sort-of counts as an Improbable Weapon. He is a guillotine, meaning that his Weapon form proper is fairly useless for Technicians in Shibusen's line of work. However, he gets around this by transforming parts of his body into bits of his guillotine form; blades on his forearms, for example.
 * And then there's the South American Death Scythe, Tezca Tlipoca, who calls himself the 'Demon Mirror'. We've no idea how he uses this to fight, however, because Medusa scarpers before he and his * monkey* Tech get a chance to attack.
 * 69 shows that the Demon Mirror's powers involve creating reflections of people, which he uses to disrupt Justin and Medusa's fight.
 * In Sid's first appearance, he fought off four of the main characters using his own tombstone as a weapon.
 * And then there's the Arabian Death Scythe, who is...a magic lamp. Yes, like the one in Aladdin.
 * Vita of Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha. Take a close look at the shape of her hammer's standard form. Now, note the balls she uses as projectiles. That's right, Vita fights using a croquet set. And yes, she did play croquet in her spare time when she was living with Hayate on earth.
 * In Bleach, Inoue Orihime uses her HAIRPINS. Specifically, she uses the six FAIRIES who live in her hairpins.
 * Coon in Free Collars Kingdom uses an anchor. It gets better though. He's a cat.
 * Master Asia from G Gundam was known for taking down Mobile Suits with sashes (pieces of cloth) and BARE HANDS. He can also take down giant robots with a silk scarf.
 * Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann: If there's a weapon more improbable than, I don't want to know.
 * When Kamina commandeers his own mecha, the Gurren, he has its broken swords fashioned into a mecha-size copy of his own legendarily badass shades - and still uses them as a weapon on many special occasions...
 * To be fair, though, that was more of an Improvised Weapon, as it was only used in the final battle. The Cool Shades definitely count, though.
 * Erm... you might want to watch the setup phase of the most common attack sequence again.
 * Mahou Sensei Negima's Mana uses thrown yen pieces. Though, rather than the coins, my wonder is: how the hell does she keep so many up her sleeve? Her opponent used a super-powerful cloth as her weapon.
 * Asuna uses a fan in serious combat until she manages to upgrade into a sword. And not a war fan, an actual paper fan, and it's not entirely played for laughs due to some special intrinsic abilities. Also, Evangeline fighting with strings (it was still awesome though) and Makie's ribbon (more so in the anime than the manga, where despite being an Ensemble Darkhorse she gets little screen time due to being very weak), which is apparently magic or something because it can do anything.
 * While not much of a combatant, Makie has shown an inhuman amount of skill with her rhythmic gymnastics ribbon, using for such things as crossing pits in Library Island Indiana Jones style, as well as being able to pick up and throw people.
 * All that skill with it and she still
 * During the Tournament Arc, Setsuna uses a deck brush in lieu of her sword to get around a restriction on bladed weapons.
 * Don't forget Chao's most powerful and greatest attack, the greatest psychological weapon created by the powers of the future...a copy of her family tree, which she claims contains the identity of Negi's future wife. The result? "Negi party obliterated! New record: 57 seconds!"
 * All this is outmatched by A friggin'.
 * As in, or as in  ?
 * Mostly the former, judging by the appearance. It's actually
 * While Mahoujin Guru Guru's heroes keep to standard fantasy-fare like staves and magic swords when using weapons, an exception exists in JuJu. JuJu is a battle priestess of her church and carries with her a portable altar. In battle, she prays at it for her god to smite bad guys down, and He does. Taking it a bit further, this tends to put JuJu into a power-mad trance which can be broken only by someone shaking a magic baby rattle at her.
 * In the first volume of Kurosagi Corpse Delivery Service, a man uses statistics to kill people. Statistics. And it's Badass.
 * Eclair from Kiddy Grade often creates a whip made out of her lipstick by drawing a line of lipstick on a surface then pulling it off the surface as a whip.
 * Bakemonogatari's Hitagi Senjogahara pulls a box-cutter blade and a stapler on Koyomi('s mouth) in the first episode. When he later catches up to her on the stairs she pulls handfuls of sharp, miscellaneous office supplies from nowhere. In the second episode she states outright that she keeps them on her person at all times for self-defense.
 * Russia of Axis Powers Hetalia is known for using a water spout. And it's more awesome than it sounds.
 * He's not the only one: China uses his wok and cooking implements, Hungary uses her frying pan and Greece uses a metal cross.
 * And although we have yet to see it used as a weapon, Russia's older sister Ukraine is often shown wielding a pitchfork.
 * White flags are weapons as well. And pasta, don't forget the pasta. Why? Because Italy says so.
 * Blazer Drive no stranger to this trope. The characters use stickers for practically all their attacks. Dachi, the main character, uses a gauntlet that sends out wires which he uses in conjunction with his electrical attacks. Heck one of the characters uses a hammer comprised of a giant fork and a jelly roll!
 * The first episode of Ga-Rei Zero utilizes bike-fu. Seriously.
 * Also, an iron and chain. The kind of iron you use to get wrinkles out of your clothing.
 * Yet neither of these compare to the magnificent, equipped with machine guns and spinning blades of DOOM!!! Starts at 4:07.
 * Princess Tutu can block swords with a fan.
 * Lampshaded in Princess Tutu Abridged.
 * The Death Note, being a notebook that kills people whose name is written in it, could easily be used as a weapon instead of a method of execution.
 * It is, in fact, a serial-murder weapon and if Light had ever been brought to trial would have been treated as such. Probably.
 * Harima used a mic stand to disrupt Hanai & Yakumo's (fake) wedding in School Rumble.
 * Mugen from Samurai Champloo wears geta that have metal plates fitted to the bottom of them, which he uses to deflect sword attacks. He is also able to use them as effective blunt weapons, or can throw them with a great amount of force.
 * Speaking of Mugen and throwing, baseballs.
 * There is also the leaders of the graffiti gang, who use an oversized butterfly knife and a practice katana with nails sticking out of it.
 * Bobobo fights using his nose hair. When this fails, he uses his armpit hair. Not to mention one of the main enemies fights by getting eaten (he's made out of Jello). Also in Bobobo's arsenal are a Magical Girl that comes out his head, an ongoing love-drama between two squirrels that live in his Afro, not to mention cross-dressing just to make an opening in his enemies' defense.
 * Don Patch fights with leeks, and Bobopatchjiggler fights with a sword that has a stone head on the edge, making it, for all intents and purposes, blunt.
 * In the Chibi Wrap Party OVA for the original Fullmetal Alchemist anime, Scar pulls off his scar and throws it like a shuriken. Automail and alchemy also apply, such as a girl who can fire a deer slug from her kneecap, or using blood, giant statues of a muscular bald man, or (in the games) a Paper Fan of Doom as ammunition or defensive/melee objects.
 * Roy Mustang himself could be said to fit in with this, snapping his fingers creating a massive explosion.
 * Ed has been known to hit people with his own detached prosthetic arm.
 * Basquash, which could be called "Weaponized Basketballs: The Animation." Main character Dan escapes a gladiatorial pit fight by turning down swords, spears, and flails in favor of a ball and his trademark Lightning Ball shot.
 * Sailor Neptune of Sailor Moon uses a Mirror, the Deep Aqua Mirror, as her weapon, though not as a physical one. Pluto uses a staff, the Garnet Rod, shaped like a key which holds her real magical weapon, the Garnet Orb, at the top. After their Super Upgrades Jupiter gets Oak Leaves and Mercury gets a lyre.
 * Surely Tuxedo Mask throwing roses deserves a mention. Even if his roses seem to be magically sharp, with greater aerodynamics, range and accuracy than a well made dart, and notwithstanding their other powers (for example, they measure his alignment when he's Brainwashed and Crazy in the first season). He also uses a cane that can function as anything from a sword, to a bo, to a throwing weapon itself.
 * Tiaras are not adequate projectile weapons. Their effectiveness in the show (and the effectiveness of all the weapons mentioned above), is an indication of how the writers themselves invoke this trope in choosing weapons for the characters.
 * Not to mention the one episode in Stars where a fully cooked pizza is used as a substitute for Sailor Moon's tiara, which she no longer had with her final upgrade.
 * Pokémon Special has Mewtwo and his Big Friggin' Spoon, which he once used to perform a Diagonal Cut on a building.
 * Speaking of Pokémon, it's worth mentioning that both Kadabra and Alakazam both use regular spoons that supposedly amplify their telekinetic abilities.
 * More like an improbable shield, but in the BW arc, a Scraggy and a Scrafty pull up their "pants" high enough to protect themselves from an incoming Ember attack.
 * Megumi from Muteki Kanban Musume learned how to throw blackboard chalk with high precision, after she witnessed how her teacher managed to hit Miki with a piece. Later she switches to hot dog skewers, since they are easier to order for her bakery--and of course much deadlier.
 * Sebastian in Black Butler, being a butler, chooses to fight with silverware.
 * Utawarerumono: The main character is wielding a steel fan.
 * Not as improbable a weapon as it sounds.
 * Kosaka Shigure from Kenichi: The Mightiest Disciple occasionally used odd weapons like wooden spoons, toy swords, and even her hair ribbon.
 * While Kirika Yumura of Noir prefers to use guns, if she has to she can find a way to kill her enemies with just about anything she can get her hands on. Over the course of the series, she has made weapons out of neckties, sunglasses, forks (twice), her student id and a disassembled toy truck. And out of that list of items, only once did she not kill her opponent with the improvised weapon.
 * Gintama. Where to start? Gin uses a wooden sword as effectively (if not more so) as everyone else uses their katana, and on occasion has had it modified to squirt soy sauce. Kagura uses her umbrella (which also doubles as a machine gun). In several episodes, Hijikata uses a giant mayonnaise cannon (in one episode taking out a helicopter). Bansai carries a shamisen and uses the strings to tie up opponents. The second half of episode 99 also has several characters wielding people as weapons.
 * While several characters have odd murder styles and the spider killer is an interesting variation on all that poison (usually employed by the hero), pride of place for improbable weapon use in the Cain Saga goes to the senile old woman who killed her nephew by bludgeoning him with a large cone of sugar. Her servants quickly made it into jam to protect her, disposing of the evidence.
 * Cain appears to have eaten said jam, even though he worked out that it had the blood concealed in it. He is really blase about murder, and the guy deserved it.
 * In Jackals, Nichol's weapon of choice is, er... well, completely fictional in design, resembling nothing so much as a grossly oversized bat'leth. He calls it "the Alligator", because of its jagged "teeth", colossal size, and ability to rip through human flesh like it ain't no thang. Albert "The Giant" Gacho gets a little more extreme when he faces off against Nichol by tearing a lamp post right out of the ground and using it as a weapon. Gacho's friend Hans favors exploding fake roses, if you can believe it. There's also Turis, who has a strange mechanical spider on a "web" line, almost functioning like a rope dart but with several unique properties.
 * Naruto features Killer Bee throwing a lightning-charged pencil at Kisame. And nearly killing him.
 * To be fair, he did just finish writing a poem.
 * Sora of Change 123 fights with a sharpened set of house keys on an extremely long key chain.
 * Magico is a manga that features a mage that use a broomstick. You know what he once did with this broomstick? He destroyed an island-sized castle.
 * Silver Diamond's quote on the title page speaks for itself.
 * In Beyblade, characters use tops to battle the tops of other characters. They have real world effects due to Serious Business.
 * John Doe wields what can best be described as a cross with a guillotine and a saw.
 * When Griffith cuts Nosferatu Zodd's arm off in Berserk, the Apostle picks it up and hits Guts with it so hard that he flies across the room. Then Zodd reattaches it.
 * One of Unzen Hyouri's Mooks in Medaka Box uses a bicycle as a weapon. However, that pales in comparison to Hyouri himself, who uses superballs.
 * One of Unzen Hyouri's Mooks in Medaka Box uses a bicycle as a weapon. However, that pales in comparison to Hyouri himself, who uses superballs.

Comic Books
"Bullseye: They have me on stool softeners and liquid food because they're afraid that if I have a solid bowel movement I'd kill someone with it. And I would, too.""
 * King of the Comics' improbable weapon users is..... Badrrrrrrrrrrrr drumroll, Bullseye! Starting from probable to improbable, billy clubs, javelins, sais, shuriken, broken glass shards, rocks, flash lights, dolls, apples, gumballs, teeth, toothpicks, playing cards, seaweed, and to top it off.... A paper airplane knocked someone the fuck out. As he said to Elektra, "You're good, but me? I'm magic!"
 * To quote one of his funniest uses of this abilities to date in the mainstream universe "So which eye, left or right?" "Which one is harder?" "From the distance, with the wind factor, using a yap dog? Left eye." And lo, the yap dog did indeed hit the left eye, yapping the entire time in flight.


 * Holy shit.
 * Gambit has the useful ability to turn any inanimate object he touches into a bomb. He has a preference for playing cards but has alternatively used small change, his staff (which is at times Adamantium and thus isn't completely destroyed), poker chips, sand, credit cards, billiard balls, a bus, and in a particularly vicious example, someone's moustache.
 * Ultimate Gambit uses this trope to his advantage in his first appearance (whether intentionally or not) to such an extent that his foe assumes that Gambit was powerless when not using his "trick cards". He was quite wrong.
 * The best example was Gambit charging the metal in Wolverine's skull.
 * Spitting his gum into the X-cutioner's face was pretty good too.
 * The Gambit in Age of Apocalypse killed Wolverine, not that Wolverine, by sticking a large rock down his pants, charging it, and then pushing him off a cliff. Boom.
 * Gambit's power works by inducing objects with kinetic energy; this not only makes these objects explode but also allows them to be propelled like a missile.
 * "Don't make me throw this pancake at you!"
 * Ultimate Hawkeye used straightened paper clips, to say nothing of the time he murdered several men by flicking his fingernails at them.
 * Among villains, The Joker has killed with acid-squirting flowers, super-juiced joybuzzers, BANG Flag Guns where the flag is also a deadly spear, and many others.
 * In his '90s run on X Factor, Peter David introduced Professor Rick Chalker, who surgically transformed himself into Number One Fan by having his hands replaced with giant, razor-sharp fan blades. Ironically not the sharpest tool in the drawer, he realized too late that he was trapped in his impenetrable lab by his lack of hands, and out of frustration, slapped himself in the forehead (with gruesome results). He was brought back to life along with his relatives Vic (who electrocuted himself while testing his super exoskeleton in the rain) and Dick, but their collective ineptitude quickly killed them for good.
 * The Green Goblin and his successors are known to use plastic ghosts alongside their other weapons.
 * Pumpkin Bombs
 * Hush, from Batman fame, was a standard gunslinger in his original appearance, but turned evil doctor in a couple later, throwing scalpels, syringes, and having Catwoman in an iron lung.
 * Night Thrasher frequently used a bulletproof skateboard as a weapon in his early days. It even had a "snikt" retractable blade!
 * A crossbow-taser was a favorite of Night Thrasher's step brother Bandit. Even more weird in that his own body generated the electricity for it.
 * The Action Girl version of Rapunzel from Rapunzel's Revenge ties her Rapunzel Hair into long braids and uses them as whips and lassos.
 * Blade's Wordsword. Instead of using spell books how they were intended, Blade tore out their pages and paper mached himself a sword out of them. In his own words: "Great against demons, not so great in the rain."
 * Though it's somewhat understandable, the last time he tried to cast a spell he got possessed.
 * Cross Gen comics had a few of these. "Now, give me what I want or I'll show you what else I can do with furniture."
 * Most Silver Age super villains had a theme centered around an improbable weapon or odd piece of technology.
 * It's a gun, Frank. A gun that shoots swords
 * Spider-Man villain Typeface was a signsmith who used big letters as weapons.
 * Spider-Man counts as well. His webshooters aren't typically thought of as weapons, but just wait until he wraps you up in a coccoon of webbing. Or snags you with one end of a webline and yanks really hard. Or hits you with another heavy object or person he's snagged with a webline. Or knocks you unconscious with a high-velocity glob of webbing.
 * Or catches you as you plummet from the George Washington Bridge! Wait... OH GOD!
 * The protagonist of Brazilian comic Monica's Gang beats up everyone with her plush bunny.
 * Penguin's trick umbrellas, anyone?
 * Jack Point has all sorts of clown toys rigged as weapons. Examples include an explosive red nose, a whoopee cushion landmine, a spray flower that sprays acid and clown shoes with knives inside them.
 * Ironman's repulser blasts are based on technology used for flight stability.
 * According to his twitter Johnny the Homicidal Maniac has killed someone with a cheeto.
 * He killed everyone in a taco restaurant- with a spork.
 * One Far Side comic featured the Dobie-O-Matic, a weapon that launched dobermans.
 * The Silver Surfer's surfboard has a tendency to be used in this manner.

Fan Fiction
""That was fun, that day. Did you know a Jedi lightsabre is based on the same technology as a cutting torch?""
 * Main character Michael uses (and goes through) several fire extinguishers in an attempt to keep the peace at his home. Since he is fighting Fun Size incarnations of Warhammer 40000 characters, it tends to lean more on the comedic side as he impresses the Space Marine Commander with the bottom of his CO 2 projector.
 * Which really starts paying off when his enemies begin using fire-ball attacks.
 * He also threatens the miniature armies with a vacuum at the start.
 * In the Star Wars fanfic Hull #721, Chief Engineer Mirannon of the Star Destroyer Black Prince makes reference to a foiled boarding attempt in which he fought off a trio of Jedi ("one half-trained and two quarter-trained idiots") using his basic maintenance equipment.


 * This makes a certain amount of sense, considering the Jedi Exile laid waste to half of Peragus Station with a plasma torch...
 * In Exoria, a Zelda fanfic which is set in modern times, rather than using a normal blade, Link uses a gunsword, a sword that folds back into a silenced handgun. The Valentine special forces also use gunswords as their standard weapon of choice.

Film

 * Desperado had guitar cases that served as rocket launchers and machineguns.
 * In Once Upon a Time In Mexico, we get a guitar case with a flamethrower.
 * James Bond:
 * Goldfinger, henchman Oddjob uses his razor-rimmed hat as a throwing weapon.
 * In You Only Live Twice, James Bond uses a sofa as a battling ram against Osato's driver. He ends up killing him (or knocking him unconscious?) with a statue.
 * Shaun of the Dead and the cricket bat. Not to mention the records.
 * In the original Austin Powers movie, Oddjob spoof "Random Task" throws his shoes as weapons. When he tries this move on Austin late in the film, he only succeeds in giving the superspy a minor headache, prompting an incredulous response: "Who throws a shoe? Honestly! You fight like a woman!"
 * Then Austin proceeds to defeat him using a Swedish-made Penis Enlarger!
 * Night at the Museum II showcases the the usefulness of a maglight, which is actually a common weapon for security guards and other types of people.
 * Smith manages to kill someone with a carrot in Shoot'Em Up. TWICE! He even uses one as a trigger finger when his hands are injured.
 * Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles features Casey Jones, who has a penchant for sporting goods, including golf clubs, hockey sticks, and a cricket bat.
 * Part of Jackie Chan's signature style is finding novel uses for various improvised weapons collected from around the scene of the fight.
 * The titular hero of Pootie Tang uses his belt with great effect.
 * In the Sammo Hung film Magnificent Butcher, Wong Fei Hung fights another kung fu master with ink brushes.
 * Practically every main character in Mystery Men uses an unusual weapon. Examples include thrown forks, a shovel, a possessed bowling ball, and flatulence. The film also includes a weapon designer who only creates improbable nonlethal weapons.
 * Tron. Sole weapon: glowy Frisbee. That the user could control its flightpath. And that could chop other characters in half, even split heads (though all we saw were jewel-like bits coming out of the helmet when this happened.
 * Anton Chigurh of No Country for Old Men has a cattle bolt gun, which uses compressed air to shoot out a retractable metal rod. He apparently uses it because it's good for blowing out locks, and not many people can tell it's a weapon.
 * Pam Grier as blaxploitation hero Jackie Brown: "I've got a black belt in barstools!"
 * Both versions of Walking Tall was all about laying the smackdown with a two by four, based on the real life Buford Pusser.
 * Then there was the guy with the bean bag gun in The Rundown.
 * In Dogma, a demon gets its clock cleaned with a golf club ... which just happened to have been blessed. Not to fight demons, mind, but to improve a cardinal's golf game.
 * In The Lord of the Rings, during the  Sam manages to use frying pans to smash the baddies and knock them unconscious.
 * In the movie of Get Smart, Larabee said he was capable of killing people with random office supplies, including post-it notes. He was most likely lying though.
 * Undercover Brother uses afro picks as throwing knives.
 * See no Evil: Kane's main method of killing people is a meat hook.
 * In Trick R Treat, Sam uses a razorblade hidden in a chocolate bar and an ultra-sharp lollipop.
 * In The Host, Gang-du gets increasingly skilled with a stop sign.
 * Oldboy stands out as particularly creative when it comes to violence. Among the objects turned into murder weapons are a hammer, a pair of scissors, a broken CD, and a toothbrush.
 * The killer of Sorority Row uses a bladed lug wrench for stabbing, throwing and at one point, after attaching some rope, as a Killer Yoyo.
 * Hellraiser III Hell On Earth features the CD and Camerahead Cenobites. Guess what their main weapons are.
 * Kung Pow! Enter the Fist Gopher-chucks!
 * In The Fastest Guitar Alive, Roy Orbison wields a guitar that conceals a rifle.
 * Among the many knives found in the Joker's pockets in The Dark Knight film, the police also pull out a potato peeler! You may cringe at the thought of how effectively he'd use it. He also makes effective use of a pencil.
 * The titular protagonist of the Japanese splatter film Robo Geisha is proficient in the use of weapons one would not normally expect to be deadly... with the most eye opening example being a pair of fried shrimp.
 * Microwave Massacre, The Nail Gun Massacre, Woodchipper Massacre, etc.
 * As the title implies, the killer's arsenal in The Toolbox Murders consists solely of stuff you'd find in a toolbox, like a hammer, nail gun, screwdriver and drill.
 * This scene from The Glimmer Man where Steven Seagal dispatches three Mooks with a credit card.
 * Chronicles of Riddick: "I'll kill you with my teacup." And he does.
 * He then threatens the other Mooks with a tiny can key.
 * The cherry bomb in Mystery Team.
 * Jason Voorhees will kill people with anything he can get his hands on, including a piece of rebar jammed into his own torso, a party horn, and a piece of metal ripped out of an irrigation system.
 * The killers in Gutterballs dispose of most of their victims with bowling pins, blunt ones for bludgeoning and sharpened ones for stabbing.
 * In Labyrinth, the goblin guards in the hedge maze sections use small, sharp-toothed critters tied to the end of poles, which bite whatever they are put near.
 * Jason Bourne. Pen, magazine, book, and a wet towel. Also, technically, an SUV.
 * Elodie Yung's character in District 13: Ultimatum used knives tied to her long braided ponytail to dispatch enemies.
 * In Daredevil, anything Bullseye throws is a murder weapon (except when thrown at his Plot Armored nemesis). This includes semi-normal things like darts, steel needles, shuriken, and one of Elektra's sai. It also includes off-the-wall items like unsharpened pencils, Daredevil's cane, and chunks of stained glass.

Literature
"One big pumpkin, her Second Thoughts urged. They get really hard at this time of year. Shoot him now!"
 * When Harry Dresden in The Dresden Files is attacked by several Black Court vampires, what does he use to take them down? Holy water....balloons.
 * Not to mention the first book, where he holds off giant magical scorpions with a housecleaning spell.
 * Red Orm in Frans G Bengtsson's The Long Ships uses a chopping block as a thrown weapon in a fight. Noone else is able to even lift it, which makes him very happy.
 * Patricia C. Wrede has a short story called "Utensile Strength" which features something called the Frying Pan of Doom. Anyone struck by the aforementioned weapon is transformed into a giant poached egg. (The story also features a barbarian hero cook-off, and is great fun.)
 * A very improbable version of the trope occurs in The Wee Free Men: The Nac Mac Feegle have what are known as "gonnagles", also known as battle poets. Resident gonnagle Not-As-Big-As-Medium-Sized-Jock-But-Bigger-than-Wee-Jock-Jock's poetry is so bad it makes ravenous monsters keel over.
 * Pictsies also allegedly carry their babies with them into battle, if only as a backup weapon. Not necessarily a poor choice, as male infant pictsies evidently use their cradle as a boxing ring.
 * In Carpe Jugulum the Pictises give King Verence a rather large cup of their battle brew. In the following battle to recapture Lancre Castle, one of the weapons mentioned is a "ballistic King", doubling as Grievous Harm with a Body.
 * And for Discworld's own Ur-example, there's Conina the Barbarian Hairdresser. A beautician by preference and a Badass by genetics (being Cohen the Barbarian's illegitimate daughter), she combines her two aptitudes by using curling irons, crimps, and other salon implements in combat. Her Discworld Companion entry speculates that Conina might convert absolutely anything -- a hairgrip, a piece of paper, a hamster -- into a deadly weapon in a pinch.
 * In Wintersmith Tiffany becomes the owner of a Cornucopia, which produces food on command and can also be used as a weapon...

"... Mr. Damon rushing toward the now disabled leader, playing both bottles of seltzer on him. Then, when all the liquid was gone the eccentric man began to beat Morse over the head and shoulders with the heavy bottles until the scoundrel begged for mercy."
 * Sam Vimes's butler Willikins grew up on the streets of Ankh-Morpork. He used a cap with sharpened pennies fastened on the brim. Since Terry Pratchett is fond of historical trivia, this is actually Truth in Television.
 * After his house is broken into in Thud Sam reflects on how comforting it is at times like this to have a butler who can throw a common fish knife so hard that it is quite difficult to remove from the wall.
 * Dwarf Bread. Implied to contain gravel as a major ingredient, it lasts for centuries, can be thrown with deadly force and accuracy, and forms a major part of dwarf culture. And in a desperate situation, you can even eat it. It would have to be very desperate though, it's use as a food source is primarily that when faced with the prospect of eating Dwarf Bread everything else looks damn tasty by comparison.
 * Gussie Two-Grins (mentioned briefly in Night Watch) was one of these, as Vimes describes him, anything was a weapon. Of course this was far from the only mention of 'not strictly speaking weapons' in the book, indeed mentions are made specifically of broken-off bottles, meat-hooks and other tools of butchery, and in one case, a hammer, wedges, and ginger, among many others.
 * In the same book there's a mention made of an apprentice who attempts to use a broken-off bottle as a weapon in the tense stand-off at the Watch House in Treacle Mine Road. Unfortunately, he does it wrong...which results in the rather tightly-gripped bottle entirely shattering into sharper-than-razor fragments. Vimes calls the only doctor in the city worth being treated by, and between the first aid Vimes applied and the doctor's surgery, the man keeps his life and his hand will work again. This goes a long way towards defusing the tense situation.
 * The Assassins' Guild Diary reveals that among the assorted lethal weapons employed for inhumations by famed guild-school graduates, the Guild museum houses a one-armed teddy bear names Mr. Wuggle.
 * Rincewind, the failure wizzard once challenged a child Sourcerer with God-like powers with
 * Beatrice of "All the Time in the World" once used a teddy bear as a weapon. Granted, it was an exploding teddy bear...
 * Female Yamani (Japanese) characters in Protector of the Small use silk fans with blades hidden in the edges for combat and for playing catch
 * There's a memorable scene in The Return of the Condor Heroes by Louis Cha when two guys duel. One takes out a fan and asks for the the other man's sword or spear to be shown. He responds by taking out a brush. Guess who's better?
 * Older Than Feudalism: The Bible
 * Samson kicks ass with an ass's jawbone. Interestingly, as animal jawbones with flaked flint chips wedged into their tooth-sockets were actually used as primitive cutting implements by many Neolithic cultures. Hey, it's easier than carving a saw from scratch out of wood.
 * Shamgar, another of the Judges, gets only one verse in the Bible, declaring that he killed 600 Philistines with an oxgoad... a stick used to make oxen move forward. From tent stakes to jars with torches in them to farm implements, one might get the impression that the ancient Hebrews considered it cheating to fight using something that was actually intended to be a weapon. And when you're fighting an oppressor, normal weapons aren't easy to come by.
 * Manly Wade Wellman wrote a series of horror/fantasy stories and novels in which a wandering minstrel named John battles evil in the backwoods of Appalachia armed only with a silver-stringed guitar. Justified in that silver is said early on to be the one thing Satan fears, and that's who John is going after. (His strings were made from old Spanish coins; his grandfather tried to fight the Devil using strings made from silver dollars, but ended up dead -- silver dollars haven't had silver in them for years. "The government of men is in league with him.")
 * A character in Stephen King's novella The Langoliers uses a toaster wrapped in a tablecloth to do some creative rearrangement of their resident psychotic's skull. Amazingly, said psychotic survives this, proving useful for once when the title entities arrive.
 * A canon Slayers short story has Lina's father ward off a mob through expert use of a fishing rod. The attackers are initially incredulous, but once he demonstrates the ability to flick the hook precisely into his target's eye, no one is too eager to attack him any more. He also later uses it to land a blow on a dumbstruck demon.
 * In the The Khaavren Romances, Khaavren's peasant servant carries a barstool as his weapon of choice after using it as an Improvised Weapon and finding it tolerably effective.
 * The Looking Glass Wars by Frank Beddor contains Hatter Madigan. His weapons include blades that come out of his wrist pieces, a backpack that looks like a swiss army knife when he wants something to fight with (including corkscrews), and a hat that he can split into blades that work as boomerangs. Since he comes from a place where imagination is one of the most important things to have, his crazy weapons are not impractical. He is well known as a very good fighter.
 * Nicholai Hel (of the book Shibumi) practices a martial art where anything can be used as a weapon. He has used the usual means of killing, but he has also made use of everyday things such as a key, a plastic cup, an ID card, and a folded magazine.
 * In Up Periscope by Robb White, an American frogman ambushed and killed a Japanese officer with a bottle of Sake.
 * In Lamb to the Slaughter by Roald Dahl a woman kills her husband with a frozen sheep leg. No, she's not a Lethal Chef, she crushes his skull with it. Then she roasts the sheep leg and feeds it to the police.
 * In the first Florida Roadkill book, a man is brutally beaten and eventually killed with a variety of convenience store supplies for insulting the cashier. The killers then pay for the items they used as weapons (and the drinks they had entered the store to purchase) and go on their way.
 * In the horror novel Stage Fright, the VR artiste's previous works include a "dreamie" in which two ghouls battle each other with shovels in a cemetary. It's unclear if they're human graverobbers or monsters, but either way, it's justified that they'd be good at wielding them.
 * Percy Jackson chokes the Nemean Lion with space meals - in the middle of the Air and Space Museum. If that's not improbable what is?
 * In Tom Swift and His Airship, towards the end, there is a fight and Mr. Damon sprays a baddie with selzer and then beats him with the bottles!


 * In Titus Alone, an enraged Flay attacks Steerpike by throwing a live cat at his face.
 * Not exactly "wielded", but the protagonist of Pest Control verbally invokes this trope when he realizes he can use New York City as a "weapon" against the foreign hitmen on his trail. Like, say, leading one gun-brandishing killer through the kitchen of an Italian restaurant, then on into its dining room filled with Mafia dons and their trigger-happy bodyguards.
 * In Harry Potter and The Philosopher's Stone, the weapon itself is not exactly improbable but the manner in which it is used definitely qualifies. When Harry and Ron rescue Hermione from the troll they have locked into the girls' bathroom with her, rather than using it to cast any sort of useful spell, Harry accidentally shoves his wand up the troll's nose (It Makes Sense in Context). The distraction caused by having "a long bit of wood up its nose" allows Ron to use his own wand in a more conventional manner, using "Wingardium Leviosa" to raise the troll's own club high into the air and knock it out.
 * The Abhorsens. Magic bells. That is all.
 * In The Cleric Quintet, Cadderly Bonaduce starts out using a yo-yo.

Live-Action TV
"Put down your weapons! Or I'll kill him with this jelly baby!"
 * Angel once killed a demonic butler with a teacup spoon because he wasn't in the mood for his smalltalk. He did it in about one second without breaking his stride too.
 * Ultraman Leo is famous for jury-rigging a number of "found" weapons in his fights. His most famous example is a pair of nunchaku he fashioned out of a pair of factory smokestacks which he bound together using an anchor chain.
 * And he later had the Ultra Umbrella that he could poke enemies with and block their attacks with while it was open.
 * Ultra Seven uses the Eye Slugger, a detachable fin on his forehead, as a boomerang.
 * Ultraman Jack got his Ultra Bracelet, used like the Eye Slugger above, from Ultra Seven
 * In many recent Super Sentai (and of course, Power Rangers) series, the Sixth Ranger usually gets the oddest weapon. Recent series' improbable weapons include a pool cue (Hyakujuu Sentai Gaoranger), sword/baseball bat/microphone (Ninpuu Sentai Hurricaneger), quill pen (Bakuryuu Sentai Abaranger), magic lamp gun (Mahou Sentai Magiranger), metal detector (Go Go Sentai Boukenger), and fish-iai sword (Samurai Sentai Shinkenger).
 * Inverted with the original Green Ranger's flute dagger.
 * Given the fact that the Green Ranger's peers used a sword, a bow, an axe (that turned into a gun), daggers and a staff, as well as having pistols that turned into knives, the Green Ranger being armed with a flute is very peculiar (though still practical thanks to the blade).
 * In Power Rangers RPM the cast takes this to new heights. Although most weapons are one use only, the consistency cast's use of the unusual earns them a place on this page: suran wrap, a baby stroller (with a baby in it no less), a building, beach umbrellas, bus doors, if it can inconvenience the Mooks it's been used. And that's not counting Summer's Zip-Charger thingy. And Dr K's violin.
 * Some Monsters Of The Week have also had odd weapon choices, such as Gnarly Gnome, who wielded a rake. That the Megazord wrenched from his hands and swung at him. He also used his accordion to confuse the Rangers and let him land some blows on the Megazord before it was punched out of his hands.
 * Gokai Green from Kaizoku Sentai Gokaiger is extremly fond of using random objects as weapons, ranging from pots and pans to a tree branch.
 * The Adventures of Pete and Pete had "Papercut" a schoolyard bully with origami mastery who could create painful paper-cutlery from any readily available paper. He demanded his opponents always through rock in Rock-Paper-Scissors.
 * Buffy qualifies as an Improbable Weapon User, since she frequently uses improvised weapons to kill vampires, especially in the early seasons. Most of these are improvised stakes, ranging in size from a pencil to a mop handle. She also decapitates a vampire with a cymbal in the pilot.
 * Sammo Hung in Martial Law could make anything a lethal weapon
 * Captain Feathersword of The Wiggles wields... well...
 * Look in your medicine cabinet. If it can fit in your ear, my mother can kill you with it. Except a moist towelette, you know, with a moist towelette, my mother can only MAIM YOU!
 * In Seattle in the '80s, late night variety show Almost Live had a send-up of kung fu movies and Public Service Announcements called, "Mind Your Manners with Billy Quan." In each episode, Quan and his opponent would use improbable weapons (such as sausage nunchakus, computer disc shurikens...).
 * Some of these also appeared on the more popular Almost Live spin-off, Bill Nye the Science Guy.
 * Leverage: Elliott Doesn't Like Guns. Anything else is fair game.
 * MacGyver is another one who Doesn't Like Guns, and is a Technical Pacifist. Doesn't stop a Swiss Army knife and the contents of a janitor's closet from becoming a veritable arsenal in his hands.
 * For a more modern take, see Burn Notice.
 * In one particularly impressive example, Michael is attempting to keep a man alive while he is being targeted by a prison gang. Three gang members pulls shivs and attempt to attack Michael in his cell, so Michael fights them with a small towel. And wins.
 * In Season 2 of Round the Twist, the kid Bronson has his feet. And his shoes. And his socks. How does that work? He 'saved his smell' by not changing his socks or shoes for over six months, until the stench became so foul that a single one of his shoes can be used to knock out an entire classroom. This is important for only one episode (although it is foreshadowed beforehand), as his whole motive behind developing this unholy gift is to save a turtle. It's that kind of show.
 * In Doctor Who, the Doctor typically doesn't carry weapons (he's a Technical Pacifist), only a Sonic Screwdriver, which is of dubious offensive capabilities at best. However, he has created powerful sonic blasts by combining said screwdriver with a sound system, and pointing it at another sonic device. He also killed an alien warrior with a satsuma, and bluffed a bunch of Daleks with a Jammie Dodger.
 * There's another one like that -


 * A funny version occurs in "A Good Man Goes to War" when Amy, fearing that an enemy was trying to get into the room, grabs what looks like a turkey baster and tries to threaten them. Turns out it's just Rory.
 * In Community episode "Epidemiology", Jeff, whose costume is David Beckham, uses his soccer ball to take out a zombie.
 * Virginia Chance's trademark weapon for whenever she needs to take out a threat to her family is a TV, though Sabrina has used it too. Burt uses a guitar to take out Smokey Floyd.
 * Glenn uses a piece of store shelving to get a Walker off of Maggie in season 2 of The Walking Dead.
 * Star Trek: Deep Space Nine: in "Empok Nor", Garak is accidentally exposed to a drug that turns him into a xenophobic, psychopathic killer. O'Brien does manage to stop him in the end, but not before Garak kills one of O'Brien's engineers with the engineer's own flux coupler.

Manhwa

 * In the second chapter of Love Aquarium Gugu throws a hamster (because it was in his co-worker's pocket) at a man with a bloody knife, threatening the main character for sneaking into an off-limit zone. The man faints from a hamster to the face.

Music

 * "Every Dog Has Its Day" by Flogging Molly contains the line, "That night on the bridge, with my shovel in hand / Well he threatened to kill me; for sure he picked the wrong man." Of course, a shovel probably only seems like an improbable weapon until someone beats you with it.

Professional Wrestling

 * Practically every signature weapon used by any wrestler. The most iconic example in the business may be the original Shiek, who would carve his opponent's flesh with a sharpened pencil or launch fireballs at them. The second most iconic may be the dreaded fork of Abdullah The Butcher.
 * Honkey Tonk Man's Guitar, Mankind's Mister Socko, Barbie the bat wrapped in barbed wire also used by Mick Foley, Rowdy Roddy Piper's Coconut, Tajiri's Green Mist, Curry Man's Curry, Candice's Metal Wand, Chris Nowenski's Metal Face Mask, The French Flag of La Resistance, The Folding Table which is sometimes lit on fire by the Dudleys, Zach Gowen's prosthetic leg, D'lo Brown's chest protector, Mikel Scicluna's roll of coins; It never ends.
 * No mention of Al Snow's good friend Head?
 * In recent years in the Diva Division, Tamina Snuka opts for her jacket. She wasn't the first in the WWE to do so.
 * Finlay is known for using the ring apron as an impromptu net to trap opponents.
 * Virtually everyone in Pro Wrestling has made use of what is the most iconic improbable weapon in the industry (heck, maybe in all pop culture); the steel chair. That it's synonymous with the profession should not detract from how odd it is to use one in the first place.
 * Averted by Triple H and his sledgehammer, which is not really an improbable weapon.
 * William Regal and anyone else who made use of brass knuckles also averts this trope.
 * There a “Top 10” List from the WWE on this trope only.

Tabletop Games

 * In Exalted, various Martial Arts:
 * Dreaming Pearl Courtesan Style is all about fighting with your clothes, namely sleeves, cloaks etc.
 * Solar Hero Style, the signature Martial Art of the Solar Exalted, can be used with any improvised weapon such as unattuned daiklaves (a type of BFS), stone columns and even other characters.
 * Dark Messiah style has a similar clause in the list of form weapons. This does lead to an Abyssal being able to beat you senseless with a coffin.
 * This pales in comparison to the Sidereal charm Generalized Ammunition Technique, which allows anything to be used as ammunition, including abstract concepts such as a shout or someone's fate.
 * One better: load a shotgun with a Lunar ally transformed into a mouse, fire him at your foe at the speed of sound, and have the Lunar transform into an elephant mid-flight, hitting the enemy with an elephant moving at Mach 2.
 * The Weapons Of The Gods RPG, based on the comics of the same name features Dugu Four Ultimates: a Kung Fu whose example is parrying your opponent's God Weapon with your tea.
 * This page lists several home-made Prestige Classes for Dungeons and Dragons that use unusual weapons as part of their gimmick. The Gambler is obviously modeled on the Setzer example listed at the top of the page, while the Necrobounge beats people to death with other dead guys, which is awesome.
 * It is possible to use other party members as improvised weapons (usually by flinging the enraged dwarf into the middle of the fray). Given a forgiving DM, it is likewise possible to gain weapon proficiencies in Angry Dwarf, Frying Pan, Tree, and Tavern Door.
 * By default damn near anything can be used as a weapon in D&D, just not with proficiency (meaning a penalty to your attack roll). Anything blunt can be treated as a club, anything sharp as a dagger or sword, etc. They just won't be as good as actual weapons that were specifically designed to be deadly. One Prestige Class, the Drunken Master, erases these penalties so a bottle or tankard or anything else you happen to have at hand is every bit as deadly as military grade weaponry. And no, there is no rule forbidding you from having such items made Masterwork quality and enchanted.
 * There is a homebrew base class called the Jester. It cannot gain proficiency with any weapons, but it doesn't have the penalties of wielding something it is not proficient with, or from it being a different size. This troper has personally used a large round table to great effect, using it for total cover, and then using the sharpened legs to stab, and even attached blades to the legs, coupled with metal gauntlets, to roll it through a field of battle, shredding 37 mooks before the table was knocked out of my hands. It was a good day.
 * In 7th Sea some Swordsman Schools specialize in improvised weapons, specifically Tout Pres and Shield Man (for the Explorers' Society). Such schools are usually not officially sanctioned by the Swordsman's Guild.
 * In the Pathfinder RPG, based on 3.5 edition Dungeons and Dragons, there is a feat called "Caught Off-Guard". This makes you not only proficient with all improvised melee weapons, but denies your opponents their Dexterity bonus to AC, making them easier to hit. If you're a Rogue, you'd also feasibly get your Sneak Attack damage. That means wackiness like dealing 1d4+ 4d6+ 2 subdual damage with a rubber chicken.
 * The follow-up feat to Catch Off-Guard is 'Improvised Weapon Mastery', which increases damage and chance to critically hit. In the beta test of Pathfinder, the feat was named 'Razor Sharp Chair Leg'.
 * An actual feasible build in Mutants and Masterminds, where a simple throwing feat plus Attack Specialisation can let you easily build a superhero with Bullseye-style accuracy throwing whatever you feel like (playing cards, USB drives, computer mice, plaster flying ducks, teaspoons, Warhammer figures...)
 * In Dungeons and Dragons there is a flaw available only to commoners known as chicken infestation, this flaw lead to a build that gives you a chicken spam attack. however this technically wouldn't work as there is a rule that says logic can over rule other aspects of the game (like using bardic music to aid move silently checks).
 * In In Nomine, Malakim of Creation have the inherent ability to use ANYTHING as a weapon.
 * One of the weapons suggested for priests following benevolent death gods in GURPS: Dungeon Fantasy is the "Sacred Shovel of Zombie Beheading".
 * In Mage: The Awakening, the Adamantine Arrows have a spell entitled "Weaponize Object". It literally works on anything the Mage can pick up, and does damage based on either how tough the object is OR how big it is.
 * Most of the weapons in Magic: The Gathering are serious ones. However, Goblins get to break that rule, even outside of the joke sets. For example, the card Noggin Whack depicts a fish tied to a brick being used as a thrown weapon.
 * Also worth noting is that while most equipment cards are hand weapons, armor, or other held/worn things, not all creatures depicted have prehensile limbs or even humanoid forms. How exactly is a snake (a regular snake, mind you) supposed to use a battle axe, or a pair of boots?
 * Tape.
 * In Scion, the Epic Strength knack "Titanium Tools" was tailor-made for this trope. Anything the character empowers through this knack while it remains in their hands ignores the effects of the user's Epic Strength allowing for fun feats like beating giants to death with trash can lids, impaling monsters with pool cues, and the like. Epic Strength's rules for throwing things around allow this trope to be applied in ballistics with equally lethal effect.
 * The Weaponry skill in New World of Darkness games has the "improvised weapon" specialty. In other words, your character can specialize in taking whatever junk is around at the moment and using it to kick ass.
 * In the short story describing the skill, a woman uses her umbrella to take out her assaulter's eye.

Video Games

 * In Super Robot Wars Z and Z2 Saisei-Hen there's the Gunleon. Its weapons include giant robot sized wrenches, nail guns, chainsaws, and an assortment of other tools. All topped off with a huge wrench that's as big as the robot itself.
 * In MDK2, Dr Hawkins uses a variety of these, with his main weapon being atomic toast, where he fires radioactive toast from a radioactive toaster. He also uses various types of bread, with an infinite white loaf as regular ammunition, Pumpernickel as explosives, and baguettes as homing bread.
 * In Vampire: The Masquerade - Bloodlines, the main character defeats a deranged prosthesis craftsman and in turn receives a severed arm. Strangely, nobody seems to object to you walking the streets carrying a floppy sawed off arm.
 * The Final Fantasy games have a wealth of Improbable Weapon Users, including:
 * Setzer (playing cards and dice) and Relm (paintbrushes) in Final Fantasy VI.
 * Oddly enough, Relm is also shown not to be the only wielder of paintbrushes in her world: in the very beginning of the game when Locke is up against a small army of monsters, Mog shows up with three parties worth of generic moogles wielding a variety of weapons; the leader of the all-generic-moogle party is actually wielding Relm's starting weapon, Chocobo Brush. (Thanks to the game's programming, the leader of the all-generic-moogle party is actually Relm.)
 * In Final Fantasy VII, Cait Sith equips "megaphones" (though it's the giant stuffed moogle who actually carries out the attacks), and Red XIII equipes "headdresses" (though he is actually shown using claws and fangs to attack). Exactly how these "weapons" boost their attack power is unknown. Cait Sith's limit breaks also include dice and armies of toys.
 * Each character had a 'gag weapon' with no Materia slots but high attack. The list - a baseball bat with nails in for Cloud, gardening gloves for Tifa, a boxing glove for Barret, an umbrella for Aerith, a hairpin for Red XIII, a shell trumpet for Cait Sith, a mop (although actually a Squeegee) for Cid and a water pistol for Vincent. Yuffie had two gag weapons - a plastic windmill, and a rubber ball. This concept was even carried over into the prequel Crisis Core where Zack uses a beach umbrella whenever he is in Costa Del Sol.
 * Final Fantasy VIII also had some rather strange weapons, but the best one is a heavy anchor thrown at the enemy. Which the character then has to retrieve. The characters limit breaks tops it with a Dragoon-style Jump Attack.
 * Quina (fork) in Final Fantasy IX. Although this refers to Quina's culinary theme, tridents are a classic military weapon, and no torch-bearing angry mob or traditional devil warrior would be complete without a good pitchfork. Quina's forks are generally big enough to stand in for either. Stranger are the lacrosse-like "racket" weapons Garnet and Eiko often use, hurling projectiles of unstated composition and endless supply.
 * Given that both Garnet and Eiko are magic-users, it can be justified in that the projectiles are actually magic. They certainly look magical.
 * In Final Fantasy X, Wakka fights by throwing sports equipment at the enemy (a "blitzball") - although, oddly enough, spike-covered combat versions of this type of ball are commonly found in weapons shops. Considering how heavy a blitzball must be to move fluidly through water, it makes some sense. Also, Lulu's stuffed plush toys have the capacity to move and attack the enemy by themselves, though they cause very little damage, because her strength is so weak. Their Weapon Abilities are far more valuable.
 * Final Fantasy Type-0 is awash with them, including a whip-sword, tarot cards, a flute, and screw-swords.
 * In Final Fantasy Tactics, certain classes can use dictionaries as weapons. If it helps matters, they attack by reading from it - presumably definitions man was not meant to hear. Also, all women can use handbags, but that's more of a practical weapon than a dictionary. And just to top it off, the "Dancer" class uses different types of cloth to attack.
 * The earliest example is, in fact, Final Fantasy III, with the Scholar (books again!), Geomancer (instruments) and Bard (harps) jobs. And yes, the aforementioned weapons are used as bludgeoning tools. In the remake, the harps are now played rather than swung. Probably songs man was never meant to hear.
 * Likewise, Final Fantasy V uses the Geomancer and Bard jobs with their instruments and books, respectively. The weapons are still laughably bad, but they are played rather than swung now.
 * Spoony Bard Edward in Final Fantasy IV uses harps to attack. The sequel lets him use bows and knives, too, though this doesn't let him use his Bardsong ability.
 * Final Fantasy Tactics Advance and Final Fantasy Tactics a 2 continue the tradition with instruments, souls (the first one) and books (the second one).
 * Final Fantasy Tactics a 2 also brings back cards as the Trickster's main weapon, which has as much range as a gun!
 * In Final Fantasy XII we have the "measures" weapon class, which includes sextants, Scales, and calipers.
 * Though they are sort of realistically designed; their attack is crap (though they ignore defense...but then again so do guns which are ranged weapons) and most buff the person they hit, but here's the thing; they weren't made to be weapons so much as an easy way to cure confuse without causing too much damage and buff someone at the same time
 * Final Fantasy XIII has male lead Snow Villiers, whose weapon is his trenchcoat. Okay, so he doesn't actually use it to hit enemies, just to buff his stats, but still...
 * Oerba Dia Vanille uses "Blind Rods" whose head piece looks like a pair of antlers and body consists of four long wires with hooks that deal damage to enemies by latching on and pulling.
 * Also, Lightning uses a variant of the gunblade.
 * Like Lulu mentioned above, Shiki Misaki in The World Ends With You animates her stuffed cat Mr. Mew for attacking (apparently scratching with non-existent claws). Then there are various environmental objects that Neku's Psychokinesis pins and Joshua's cell phone send at the Noise... Beat's skateboard is, ironically, one of the more realistic weapons in the game: he just uses it to smack the crap out of everyone.
 * Grand Theft Auto San Andreas has the usual fare of melee weapons, including stick-like implements. But then you have fire extinguishers, spray cans, bunches of flowers, and even sex toys. The kicker? They can still incapacitate or kill, and can even be used to bash cars until they catch on fire.
 * One of the special weapons in Silent Hill 2 is the Hyper Spray. Its effectiveness as a weapon depends on how high you score on previous playthroughs. At its weakest, it behaves on enemies as you might expect a can of unknown chemicals to behave: it merely stuns them. Earn a perfect 10 stars, however, and you have a spray can full of instant death to anything it touches!
 * The combat system of Silent Hill Origins is at least partially built around this trope, as it features weapons such as televisions, toasters, typewriters, table lamps and filing cabinets.
 * In Scribblenauts, Maxwell's weapons are damn near every noun in the English language.
 * In Kingdom Hearts, the main weapon featured in the series, wielded by many major characters, and all main playable ones, is a giant magical key that they hit people with. It's not the only unusual weapon featured in the series. Goofy's weapon is a shield, which is far more normal than a key at any rate. Organization XIII also has members who use a shield, a book, a sitar and a giant deck of playing cards.
 * Three of the five playable characters in Evolution Worlds qualify. Mag uses what is basically a cybernetic third arm that can also use hammers, bug spray and bowling balls, Chain uses a jet pack with a giant blade on the back, and Linear uses a Frying Pan of Doom. The other two use guns/ blasters.
 * The Squaresoft game Bahamut Lagoon, while not having specific characters with improbable weapons, does have various items that all characters can throw to cause damage or status effects. These items include Sweet Memory, Porno Mag, and Botched Cookie.
 * If you raise Ayla in Chrono Trigger to very high levels, her only weapon - fists - become "Iron Fist" and later "Bronze Fist". It's also possible to equip Crono with a Mop.
 * Here's the fun part: ** Level Crono can still solo Lavos with it, too.
 * Almost everyone is this in Improbable Island, seeing as how the Drive changes everything in humorous ways.
 * Tales (series):
 * Klarth F. Lester from Tales of Phantasia uses a book, and Arche uses a broom. Somewhat Justified Trope, as they're spellbooks and flying brooms, and are used more to boost the magic power of the characters than to hit people with.
 * A running gag in the Tales (series) is for the player to find extremely powerful but unlikely weapons for the characters late in the game. In Tales of Symphonia, for example, Lloyd can buy a pair of giant paper fans and Presea (who usually uses an axe) can buy a giant toy hammer; Will in Tales of Legendia receives a sledgehammer at the end of one Sidequest that has its weight (a whopping 765 kg) actually painted on it.
 * As a possible Shout-Out to Legendia, Karol Capel from Tales of Vesperia gets this exact same weapon.
 * This one is actually an in-joke: in Japanese, "765" is pronounced "namuko"- which sounds like the name of the company that made the game: Namco
 * The best one, though, would probably be Sheena, from Symphonia; she uses cards with shinto wards inscribed on them. Her gag weapon is even more ridiculous; she beats enemies up with paper money.
 * That makes sense though, since summoners in mediveal times delivered cards to summon people to court. Guess they did the research.
 * Her joke weapon is actually a Money Bag, presumably full of coins.
 * Tales of Symphonia also has Genis, who uses a kendama, a child's toy. Presumably, he plays with it to help improve his focus and rhythm while he has free time. He also claims to have knocked Lloyd out with it accidentally the first time he used it, and Lloyd knocks himself out with it when he plays with it in a skit.
 * Marta from the sequel wields a ring with a pair of blades poking out of it, or a ring with three blades poking out of it. Which apparently spin without a motor, which would realistically render this weapon even more useless than it already it. Not that that stops her from extremely long combos in melee and cutting down foes left and right.
 * Anise in Tales of the Abyss quite sensibly uses maces and magic scepters as weaponry... But she never actually attacks with them. Instead, she attacks by animating her stuffed bear with magic and turning it into a seven foot tall engine of destruction. She's the game's Cute Bruiser, incidentally.
 * Most of the weapons used by the heroes in Tales of Vesperia tend to sit within the realm of probability--swords, maces, hammers, knives, polearms, bows, etc. That is, except for Rita, who uses sashes (Long pieces of cloth), along with the aforementioned kendama. She also gets some more practical chains and whips, though.
 * In Tales of Symphonia, Presea and Zelos can randomly start a fight wielding a giant plush bunny or a bouquet of flowers, respectively, if they have their formal outfits on.
 * Tales of Eternia's Meredy uses a whistle to command her actual attacking weapon, her Team Pet Quickie. Chat uses handbags full of infinite cannonballs, which she throws.
 * Tales of Hearts carries on the tradition. Kohak's Soma Elrond's weapon half takes the form of a baton, and Beryl's Thiers produces a paintbrush as tall as she is.
 * The baton can be used as a blunt object, like a pipe or something though. The Elrond seems to be useful as a weapon with the balls at each end, and she sometimes uses magic to reinforce them in her melee moves
 * Tales of Legendia has more then its fair share of improbable weapon users, as well. Will uses a hammer, which is a normal weapon, but he seldom uses it, despite being the buffest member of the party (A fact that gets lampshaded by someone). There's also Shirley who uses pens and brushes, Grune who uses urns, and Norma with straws that she uses to blow bubbles at enemies. Granted, none of the spellcasters can learn any physical attacks, but they're still odd weapon choices.
 * Shirley actually throws her Teriques, and is the only caster to actually have an attacking combo because she can send it halfway across the battlefield.
 * Tales of Graces goes on with it. Malik has a BOOMERANG SWORD. He throws it... and it flies back. And not to mention Hubert, who wields twin swords (which are connected to be a staff...) that can change to twin pistols AND a bow.
 * The characters in Chrono Cross have weapons that include stirring spoons, fishing lures and carrots, among others. Making things slightly less ridiculous here is that, for the most part, you have to have them specially made by blacksmiths... although enough merchants do sell them that one wonders why.
 * A fan-made game mod for The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion allows the PC to equip a particular slaughterfish as a gag weapon. It does just enough damage to get the City Watch on your case.
 * There is another mod called Deadly Clutter that allows you to equip useless items such as paint brushes as daggers, bowls as helmets, paint pallets as shields, and many more
 * Princess Toadstool's weapons include a Parasol, War Fan, Frying Pan, and a Special Glove in Super Mario RPG: Legend of the Seven Stars and Super Smash Bros Melee. In her own feature game, Super Princess Peach, she employs a parasol named Perry who can change shape. And devour enemies.
 * Forget Toadstool. One of Bowser's weapons is a little Mario doll. Wich he promptly uses to switch places and attack throwing THE REAL MARIO.
 * Although you have to admit, Mario is a pretty good weapon. He kills enemies and isn't afraid of anything.
 * Similar to the D&D example above, Bowser can also make use of a Chain Chomp (think Pac-Man with a lot more teeth) by swinging it over his head and throwing it at the enemy. If you know about timed hits, the Chomp latches onto the enemy's face with its teeth and starts biting.
 * Mallow uses Cymbals, and Geno can launch his hands or fire cannonballs out of his elbow.
 * Although not a weapon perse, Bundt, a giant cake, attacks you with some pretty powerful magic... and also, apparently, can scratch you?
 * Booster uses a train, and Yaridovich uses his own head. The latter case is justified to a degree, since Yardiovich is a spear-like monster.
 * From the Paper Mario series of games, Mario is armed with a jump attack (which is pretty weird when you think about it; why not just punch them like in Mario 64?) and his hammer, which are relatively normal. Some of his companions, though...Bow's strongest attack is to slap the enemy silly with a fan, Sushie spits water, and it's a plot point in the second game that your Yoshi companion has an attack that spits an enemy into another enemy. Some of the enemies are pretty crazy, too; over the course of the games, Mario risks being suffocated by clouds, being shot by an audience cannon, having a Pokey's body sections thrown at him, and being completely destroyed by a flower's singing voice.
 * Kirby has a fairly large repretoire of abilities he can call upon with his copying powers. Some are understandable, like the Reflecting Laser or the fire breath. Then there's things like Ball (Kirby becomes bouncy and spherical, and with enough velocity can damage enemies by bouncing into them), Mike (Kirby's voice is amplified to the point where it harms all onscreen enemies), and Stone (Kirby takes himself for granite and drops onto the foe).
 * Kirby 64 allows you to combine two abilites, often with insane results. Highlights include an active volcano (worn as a hat), ice skates, fireworks, and a refrigerator. To elaborate on that last one: Kirby transforms into a fridge and flings deadly food at the enemy...and any leftover food can be eaten to heal Kirby.
 * In Kirby Super Star, he can use a yo-yo as an effective weapon.
 * And how about the secret power . It has (somehow) about the power of Crush
 * There are several characters in the Shadow Hearts series who fight with improbable weapons.
 * Alice Eliott (Shadow Hearts) uses books. Bibles, mostly. To smash people with.
 * Joachim Valentine (Shadow Hearts: Covenant), in true pro-wrestler fashion, uses an arsenal of "found" weapons which include a locker, a mailbox, a frozen tuna, and a submarine. (His teacher, the Great Gama, fights with a pirate statue.)
 * Anastasia Romanov (Shadow Hearts: Covenant) uses Fabergé eggs.
 * Gepetto (Shadow Hearts: Covenant) attacks with an ambulatory puppet which mimics his movements; his "weapons" are improved varieties of marionette string, the ultimate being the Red String of Fate.
 * In Shadow Hearts: From the New World, odd weapons include vintages of alcohol, guitars, and swords made by sticking a hilt on a vaguely cylindrical object (including a bus stop sign, a cactus, a firecracker, and a Sword in the Stone with stone still attached).
 * Persona 2 Eternal Punishment has Baofu, who uses Yen Coins to attack with. Justified Trope because it is stated in-game that he uses chi to throw his coins with the force of bullets but still.... coins?!
 * At least that one is explained...unlike Jun's flowers and Eikichi's guitar-case-machine-gun-thing.
 * Persona 3 has a number of 'gag' weapons that are remarkably powerful, gained as side quest rewards. These include the Toy Bow (with suction cup arrows), Nailbat (wielded as a two-handed sword), and the Bus Stop Sign.
 * The PSP remake due to altering the weapon system adds even more joke weapons. The male lead (who can only use swords now) has several large kitchen knives, the female lead that uses bladed spears also gets several hockey and lacrosse sticks (the ultimate of which has the Atlus logo on it) and Mitsuru gets a few umbrellas. And of course the Bus Stop Sign returns although you won't see it much.
 * And Persona 4 has Kanji's beginning weapon, the folding chair. Similarly, Yukiko's weapons are all folding fans that she tosses at her enemies.
 * Kanji keeps getting better; first weapon you can buy him is a desk.
 * Kanji really takes the cake here. Half of Kanji's weapons are shields (that he blugeons people with) and half are random heavy objects (that he blugeons people with) but it makes sense because Kanji's just a thug that throws his weight around during battle rather than a trained fighter.
 * And the protagonist that usually uses swords also gets two sets of sports equipment weapons one of which is poor and one of which is pretty good. A golf club (with a cheap bargin bin one, and a well made titanium one) and a baseball bat (a wooden one and a metal one with the Atlus logo on it)
 * Yosuke has a few weapons that are merely pipe wrenches. One of which can be found early in the game and is useful for a long time after, as it is one of his most powerful weapons at that point and also increases his SP.
 * Komachi Onozuka of the Touhou series also uses coins in her spell card attacks. And those coins will come at you fast, and they will HURT.
 * The FPS game Blood has a voodo doll, stabing hurts the enemy or you if there are none, and it can skin monsters alive.
 * In Time Crisis 2, the second boss character, a bloke in sunglasses, picks up an ICBM and swings it at you......despite it surely weighing several tonnes. Then when you shoot him enough he drops it and it rolls away like a cardboard tube.
 * In its pseudo-sequel Crisis Zone, at the end of the Garland Technology Center stage, you fight a pair of elite soldiers: A thin athletic man with paired foldable blades on his wrists, appropriately named "Edgey", and a hulking brute with an anti-tank rifle named "Tiger". While Edgey spends his time dashing about and flinging throwing knives at the player, Tiger tends to simply use his greater bulk to shrug off hundreds of rounds pumped into him while firing his weapon in return. However, on occasion he will throw a large box, kick a ladder, or even pick up and swing a steel girder.
 * Several of the characters in the Guilty Gear series are armed with... off-kilter weaponry. Cute Bruiser May uses a ship's anchor that's literally as big as she is tall, Faust uses a giant scalpel, Bridget (famed for inspiring another trope) is a Killer Yoyo user, and on close inspection Sol's Fire Seal sword resembles a large Zippo lighter. Among the assassins, Millia's hair and Zato-1's shadow are living bioweapons, and Venom uses a pool cue. Dizzy's metamorphing wings are sentient, Baiken has a Swiss Army Weapon replacing her missing arm, I-no uses a guitar and her living hat, the ghosts possessing Zappa throw him at enemies, A.B.A drags around a huge key, and Anji uses paper fans of doom. Lampshades are hung in various character's win comments against these characters, as they comment on their foe's tastes in arms.
 * Fina's weapon in Skies of Arcadia is a floating blob by the name of Cupil. Feeding him "chams" allows him to upgrade; he then attacks by changing into an anvil, frying pan, cannonball, lance, etc... or, in his final form, just gets big and eats them. To add insult to injury, Final Cupil is also the Infinity+1 Sword.
 * Vyse and Aika, from the same game, get gag weapons if you complete a sidequest (Gamecube remake) or download them (Dreamcast original): a tuna fish and a giant lollipop. Each has an incredible spike in one stat, to the near-absolute loss of all the others.
 * The Swirlmarang (Aika's giant lollipop) has a 100% chance of causing panic if it hits anything not immune to it, effectively making it a Lethal Joke Item.
 * In the first Xenosaga game, chaos used gloves as his weapon. However, the upgrades were more like downgrades, going from large padded safety gloves down to old ragged pair of holey (Holy) gloves. In retrospect, chaos's character had the ability to destroy gnosis simply by touch, the gloves acting to seal his power, so really, "downgrading" to get more power isn't so implausible (in a fantasy-ish way).
 * Riki from Xenoblade Chronicles uses biters as his weapon of choice. They're essentially maces with heads in the shape of that of various animals, which wouldn't be too odd, if not for the fact the jaws on said heads are movable, and can be used to bite things as their name implies. His starting one looks extremely silly, but the later ones in the shape of lions and dragons could fall into the Impossibly Cool Weapon category.
 * Lunar: Eternal Blue has one in the form of Jean. Well, it's unorthodox before she learns Martial Arts and fights barehanded, but she still throws Bladed Dancer Fans.
 * The two main characters of Lunar: Dragon Song both fight with unconventional weapons: Lucia with umbrellas and Jian with shoes (which he does at least kick with, not throw).
 * Kisala in Rogue Galaxy also uses shoes as her secondary weapons. Her primary weapons are a pair of daggers, though, and the other characters wield a fairly traditional combination of guns, swords, and other "real" weapons.
 * Phantom Brave took this trope to the logical extreme, allowing you to use almost anything as a weapon, so long as you can pick it up. This includes rocks, shrubs, vegetables, and even people.
 * And any of those items can be made into an Infinity+1 Sword.
 * Don't forget about the fish. And fish cake. Oh and the giant bell.
 * Makai Kingdom, also by Nippon Ichi, feature (among the more conventional guns/swords/drills/giant robots) books, frying pans, Magical-Girl style ribboned wands, balloons, UFOs (for stealing items) and...pies. (Though, to be fair, the pies are only good for healing.)
 * You also can pick up and use as a weapon anythin on the field: debris, your party members and enemies. To top it off AI seems to like using his own troops as weapons.
 * Disgaea seems to have lampshaded this - for the description of the weapon "Lion's Heart" it has, "Why is this in the weapons category...?"
 * Of course, Disgaea has the infamous equippable horse weiner...
 * Disgaea 3 also gives us the Diez Gentlemen, supposedly a group of elite legendary demons (So legendary they count as a lie), the first one you fight carries a shovel as a weapon.
 * That's not all. There's also such weapons as dumbbells, tennis rackets, stop signs, and even baked potatoes and pieces of meat (and let's not even start on the Puppy paw Stick).
 * While not a weapon per se, Mario Superstar Baseball has DK use a boxing glove instead of a baseball bat. This continues into the sequel, where Baby DK uses a Banana, King K. Rool uses his scepter, the Kremlings all use bats that look like spiked dumbbells, and Funky Kong uses a surfboard.
 * Cream the Rabbit in Sonic the Hedgehog is known to use her pet Chao, Cheese, as a weapon. Similarly, in Sonic Adventure, Tails uses his tails as a flail-like weapon, with a pendant augmentation that allows him to spin at a much higher speed.
 * In The Typing Of The Dead (based on House of the Dead 2), you defeat hordes of zombies by typing, rather than using the Light Gun. In CutScenes, the characters are depicted as wearing Dreamcasts (The Play Station 2 remake used a Play Station 2) as backpacks, and using a computer keyboard instead of a gun.
 * The browser-based MMORPG Kingdom of Loathing is full of improbable weapons, such as the duck-on-a-string and the aptly-named ridiculously overelaborate ninja weapon. What "normal" weapons there are tend to come in ridiculous variations (like the flaming cardboard sword and the denim axe).
 * The female characters in the Dynasty Warriors series of games tend to fight with improbable weapons: either sharpened fans, or, in one especially memorable instance, a flute that magically sets people on fire.
 * There were/are actual Iron Fan weapons, which were basically a normal fan with an iron frame with sharp points instead of a wooden frame.
 * That being said, Zhuge Liang wields his signature feather fan. Sima Yi also wields one except in 6, where he wears claws that shoots cutting wires from the fingertips.
 * Samurai Warriors continues this, with Okuni's umbrellas, Oichi's kendama (Cup & Ball), and No's gigantic claws that pop in from Hammerspace. Mitsunari and Shingen's fans-as-weapons seems slightly more probable than those.
 * Motochika Chosokabe uses a Shamisen. And attacks with sound balls. Yoshimoto Imagawa has a sword, but also carries around a kemari (ball) which he kicks at people and it explodes.
 * Dynasty Warriors 7's Ma Dai fights with a giant paintbrush in a way reminiscent to Okami, Bao Sanniang fights with a giant bladed yo-yo and then, from Jin, we have Zhuge Dan, who fights with a feather fan like his better known cousin, Zhong Hui who fights with five flying swords, Deng Ai, who wields a drill lance, Guo Huai with his arm cannon as well as the aforementioned Sima Yi, who returns with a faction change and his feather fan but still makes use of the DW 6 claws in his Musous. That being said, that's half of Jin who is doing it.
 * Don't forget Warriors Orochi's exclusive characters. Da Ji wields a pair of flying balls, Himiko wields similar weapons called Dogu. Taigong Wang wields a fishing rod, Zuo Ci some tarot cards, Yoshitsune Minamoto has a frickin' lightsabre-gauntlet-thing, and San Zang fights with her oversized sleeves.
 * The titular character in American McGee's Alice is all about unlikely weapons (just look at the page quote), as her entire arsenal is toys from her childhood. Razor sharp cards, explosive jack-in-the-boxes, demonic dice, and deadly jacks are just some of the deadly tools of her trade. Her BFG is an actual real-life weapon, though, but still extremely exaggerated in its utility.
 * The sequel, Alice: Madness Returns, has Alice with a pepper-grinder, a hobby horse, a teapot cannon and a clockwork bomb in the shape of a rabbit.
 * Phantasy Star Online includes a sidequest that requires you to find weapon fanatics, talk to them with the appropriate enthusiasm, and eventually talk to their leader. The "ultimate weapon"? A frying pan.
 * Then there's the Chain Sawd, a hybrid chainsaw/sword that absorbs HP.
 * The Priest, Sage and Taekwon Master (AKA Star Gladiator) classes in Korean MMORPG Ragnarok Online are able to equip a variety of books as weapons, ranging from Bibles and diaries to ancient stone tablets. The priests and sages hit the opponents with them while the Taekwon Masters seem to simply hold them for inspiration.
 * In fact, the first Book a sage gets is their own hardcover graduation thesis. So... knowledge is power?
 * And let's not forget the Bard class and their instruments.
 * Not exactly a weapon to wield, but Honorable Mention: Paladins can throw GOD at you.
 * In Diablo 2, when you go to the village of Tristram, you can find the corpse of Wirt (the annoying kid from the first game who would sell you overpriced magical items every so often), and rob his body, getting a LOT of gold....and his peg leg, which you can use as a club with 3 sockets....although if you didn't socket it, at the end of the game you could combine it with a Tome of Town Portal in the Horadric Cube to go to the Secret Cow Level. Still, the image of using someone's peg leg as a weapon is quite strange.
 * In Warcraft 3, the item "Wirt's Other Leg" exists, but isn't terribly useful.
 * In World of Warcraft, this is continued with the item "Wirt's Third Leg", a rare level 40 1-handed mace.
 * And Hellgate London has its own "Wart's Peg Leg", which functions as a "sword" but gives you added defence as well.
 * The Soul Calibur series has joke weapons for most of its characters. The joke part is played up with silly sound effects that the weapons make upon hitting the enemy. Worth mentioning are Xianghua's giant calligraphy brush, Siegfried/Nightmare's sawed-off galley oar, Taki's tobacco pipes, Voldo's tambourines, Lizardman's leg of meat + grill lid and Raphael's cane (which comes complete with its own Laugh Track). A sword for Siegfried looks like a squid and goes squish when it hits something.
 * Tambourines got promoted to a non-joke discipline for custom characters in 3.
 * Said squid appears in Soul Calibur 3 in Nightmare's arsenal.
 * In Soul Calibur 4 he has a surfboard on a stick. Yes...a surfboard on a stick.
 * One can argue that Tira's standard weapon, essentially an edged steel hula hoop, is an example as well.
 * This comes full circle in IV, where her joke weapon is a literal hula hoop.
 * Gordon Freeman of Half Life uses a crowbar. In itself, it's not exactly improbable, but he uses it to stop an alien invasion.
 * One cannot forget the CHINESE TAKE-OUT.
 * Several characters from the Samurai Shodown series have wacky weapon choices; the contender for top spot is Morozumi Taizan's giant calligraphy brush. Also of note is Wan Fu's stone pillar, Seigfried's oversized gauntlet...
 * In Dwarf Fortress throwing was bugged in that even something as inconsequential as a thrown fly or a thrown glob of vomit would cause ridiculous wounds.
 * Not to mention Captain Ironblood beating a hydra to death while naked... and wielding a cabinet.
 * Giants and colossi would wield the first thing holdable, leading to death by pants. Adventurers could do likewise, and rack up legendary kill-counts on the least likely of objects.
 * One of the most famous examples is a player in Adventure Mode who encountered a Bronze Colossus, grabbed the first thing he could find in his backpack, and proceeded to headshot the Bronze Colossus with a thrown Fluffy Wambler.
 * A less extreme but more common example: A mining pick is one of the game's most deadly weapons, due to Real Life picks' advantages being simulated but not the disadvantages.
 * Condemned: Criminal Orgins, and Condemned 2: Bloodshot for the Xbox 360 have many improvisational weapons, including prosthetic limbs, crutches, and weirdest of all, exploding dolls. The game did feature firearms and hand to hand combat, but in the first Condemned, Ethan didn't carry any extra ammo, and so could not reload (however, the weapon could be used as a bludgeon both to conserve ammo and as a fallback if he ran out - the firearms were the only example of Breakable Weapons, though.), and in the second, ammo had to be scavenged from other weapons of the same type, or ammo boxes - which were, as usual, hard to come by. This led to the player relying on melee weapons (in the original) and his fists (in the sequel).
 * Being a doujin fighting game starring various Visual Novel characters by Key Visual Arts, Eternal Fighter Zero has nearly every character as an Improbable Weapon User. Weapon examples include cellos, vacuum cleaners, jars of jam, giant taiyaki, ice cream cartons, stuffed animals, and lots of pulpy peach juice.
 * Watanabe Seisakujo's Tsukihime doujin fighting game Melty Blood, later rehashed by Ecole, features the Tohno maids in full blast as Battle Maids. Hisui, powered by the Tatari, has her personal Hyperspace Arsenal ("Hisui's Gate of Babylon") where she can attack by launching books, hangers, vases, lamps and trays. Other weaponry include This Chair (and Table), Explosive Plum Bento, a Frying Pan of Doom, a Stirring Spoon of Hurt, a Bucket and Cloth and a watering can. Kohaku follows up with syringes, semi-sentient plants that can literally pack a punch (Go, Johnny!) and her trademark broom, which, justifiably, doubles as a sword sheath. And her Mech-Hisui, which is also a playable character...
 * Other lighter examples include Sion's Etherlite (an ultrathin Mind Reading whip), Akiha's hair, Shiki's fruit knife, and Len's cats.
 * Planescape: Torment's various improvised weapons. Let's see, a scalpel, a zombie's arm, your own arm, a hollow axe, a fingernail, three different sets of teeth ...
 * Super Smash Bros has several instances of this:
 * Luigi can use himself as a missile attack.
 * Me-doken!
 * Peach, as mentioned above. She can also bring out Toad as a counterattack.
 * Mr. Game&Watch, using elements from the various Game&Watch games he is derived from, uses bacon, a turtle, a chair...
 * Wario has fart moves. He can also eat bombs with little effect on himself, but damaging nearby enemies (and himself). And then after he's finished riding his motorbike he can throw it at you.
 * And not to mention the various items if you play with them that is.
 * Ness' weapons aren't quite as improbably as the ones above, but he does use a yo-yo and a baseball bat.
 * GTA San Andreas lets you bludgeon your enemies to death with such items as flowers, or a double ended dildo.
 * Their primary purpose is to be given to girlfriends as gifts, but still. If CJ's strength is maxed out, he can beat any ped to a pulp with flowers in a matter of seconds. Oh, the humanity hilarity.
 * Manhunt has quite a few gory weapons that can be used to massacre the various mooks, but the very first one you get is a plastic shopping bag, which is wrapped over a mook's head to suffocate him.
 * In Devil May Cry 3, Dante gains the boss Nevan's soul in the form of a guitar. That fires balls of lightning and bats. And has a scythe blade attached to it. It works much better that it seems, though, having high crowd control value and power. Then there's Cerberus. While three-section weapons are nothing unusual in of themselves (see the Shikai and Bankai versions of Ikkaku Madarame's zanpakuto, Hozukimaru for an anime example), Cerberus' three sections are attached to a central ring instead of being linked one-to-the-next.
 * Then in Devil May Cry 4 the game's first protaganist uses a sword with an engine inside.
 * Also in Devil May Cry 4 there is the Pandora gun, which is a floating missile platform/chakrum/missile longbow/cluster missile launcher/big friggin' laser. Of course, its most powerful attack comes in its normal form (a Briefcase Blaster) when Dante merely drops it on the ground and opens it.
 * And then there's the cutscene on 3 when Dante uses Lady's motorcycle to batter enemies. In the air.
 * Earthbound has Ness saving the world with increasingly powerful baseball bats, sling-shots and yo-yos. Or Jeff and his incredibly powerful bottle rockets. Paula wields a frying pan. The prequel game is similar.
 * And in Mother 3, Lucas and Flint wield wooden and metal rods, Kumatora equips gloves for weapons, and Duster uses boots. Improbable in more ways than one with Duster, since one of his legs is partially paralyzed.
 * And while we're talking about yo-yos, Mike in StarTropics uses one quite effectively to  Sure, he eventually gets it powered up, but still...
 * The yo-yo was initially developed as a weapon, so this isn't exactly outside the realm of believability.
 * Ebisumaru in the Ganbare Goemon series can be said to have an entire arsenal of improbable weapons, with a new one for almost every game. This list includes flutes, noisemakers, paper fans, hula hoops, dance ribbons, squeaky hammers, hammers made of meat, spring-loaded boxing gloves, frying pans, rice spoons, badminton paddles, and even skewered oden. All he needs is a good umbrella to round things out.
 * The title character Goemon himself is using pipes and coins for fighting
 * Makoto from Enchanted Arms uses a saxophone for his weapon. This could possibly be justified by him also "singing" at a very high volume and blowing really hard into, which means that the enemies are taking damage from the intense volume of the sound that the sax is making - except that he uses the same animation for healing party members...
 * See also: Midvalley the Hornfreak from Trigun and his saxophone, Sylvia. It's also loaded with machineguns.
 * Led Campbell from Septerra Core used a huge wrench as her weapon.
 * Virtually anything in Nethack can be wielded in combat or thrown at enemies, including pickaxes, eggs, potion bottles, gems, coins, or the dead bodies of your enemies. The latter is actually quite effective when you're wielding a dead cockatrice. There's even an in-joke/tradition about beating one late-game enemy with the most improbable weapon you can think of.
 * Besides his Sinister Scythe, Prometheus from Mega Man ZX can kill people with his blue hair. And it would be pretty damn unavoidable against anyone who can't jump high enough or wall-jump.
 * There's also Quint from the Gameboy Mega Man series, who uses a nuclear-powered pogo stick.
 * In Mega Man Powered Up, Roll can take down hordes of robots with a broom. She can also be equipped with a flag, a net, an umbrella/parasol, a candy cane or a fish. She even has a BOX OF CHOCOLATES, for crying out loud!
 * Apart from the already mentioned Leg, World of Warcraft has quite a few gag weapons, such as a fish or a bear bone (which would be a pretty decent weapon if it didn't drop off enemies that are over twice the required level). Not to mention a slew of engineer toys that are just as likely to backfire as they are to do what they are intended for.
 * Cookie's Tenderizer. Nothing says you mean business like a rolling pin!
 * On the topic of the fish, Dark Herring is a fish, wielded as a dagger, that does more damage than the swords of one of the canonically stronger characters in the game. It can be dual-wielded as well. "Herring Seeks your life" indeed.
 * Combined with some of the treants (walking trees) and ancients (giant walking trees who threw boulders as their primary attack in warcraft 3), many Monty Python jokes can be made.
 * And during the Brewfest holiday event, you have a chance of getting a mug of beer to use as a 1H mace. It's actually pretty decent for Enhancment Shaman. Off the same boss, you also have a chance of winning a broken beer bottle to use as a dagger. And while the developers have explicitly said that in patch 4.3, joke items like the fish won't be usable for transmogrification (which you can use to change the appearance of your equipped items to other items of the same type in your possession), the mug currently is a valid item for transmogrification purposes on the PTR.
 * In Tron 2.0, while there were other weapons, the hands-down most useful one was a frisbee. A glowing frisbee that doubled as a shield. Could be upgraded later on to exploding and multiple-throw versions. Throwing it to attack left you defenseless until it came back - and no, you couldn't switch to another weapon while it was in flight. This made the multiple-throw version useless, as you were defenseless until all the discs you'd thrown had come back to you.
 * The disc weapon is in keeping with canon (and the older Tron video games), where it is the most powerful weapon inside a computer.
 * In the Penny Arcade game On the Rain-Slick Precipice of Darkness: Episode One, your character uses a rake. By the end of the episode, it's a super-powered rake with spikes on it, but it's still, essentially, a rake. One of your other party members uses his fists,.
 * The sequel breaks your rake and gives you a hoe. You can also get a cardboard tube, just like in the comics!
 * In Zombies Ate My Neighbors, the protagonists Zeke and Julie can wield at least a dozen non-weapons as weapons. Water pistols, exploding six-packs of soda, fire extinguishers, weedwhackers... The only probable weapons in the game are the bazooka and the.
 * The twist here is that every weapon (even the joke weapons like tomatoes and dinner plates) could One Shot the right enemy (For instance, the plates could take out Mummies in two shots and the tomatoes were great for use against Martians)
 * Leon from Star Ocean the Second Story fights with books: he opens it, and some sort of spectral valkyrie pops out to lay a smackdown. Chisato from the same games has Tazers, Precis the Gadgeteer Genius has robot hands coming out her backpack, and Opera has a laser rifle... That she smacks people with. Welch from the psp remake uses a freakin' handy stick.
 * Peppita from Star Ocean Till the End of Time fights with a combination of shoes and capes.
 * Shantae uses her hair. HER HAIR!
 * As does Sindel from Mortal Kombat.
 * And Emeralda from Xenogears.
 * And the main character from Kabuki Quantum Fighter.
 * Heike Kagero from Super Punch-Out!!.
 * Suetake from Otogi 2: Immortal Warriors. Aside from the fact that Suetake is a magical levitating tree/human hybrid, his default weapon is a wagon wheel. A levitating, magical and most likely pointy wagon wheel, nonetheless, but it's still a WAGON WHEEL.
 * In the Simpsons arcade game, three of the four playable characters use improbable weapons, while the last (Homer) uses no weapons at all. Bart attacks with his skateboard, Marge with a vaccuum cleaner and Lisa with a jump rope.
 * Homer being a boxer, on the other hand, is of course canon. Although his fighting style should have mostly revolved around being punched in the face. I guess that makes him the tank.
 * Culotte of La Pucelle Tactics may take the cake for shear variety of improbable weapons. He throws mushrooms, monsters, lollipops, bombs, apples, rocks, and many other unusual things at enemies. And those are just his "normal" attacks.
 * One of his skills involves throwing a series of those 'weapons' at the enemy. The skill description reads "Everything but the kitchen sink..."
 * River City Ransom has conventional weapons one would expect to find in an urban environment, like clubs, pipes, bike chains, rocks, and brass knuckles, but you can also beat people up with trash cans, car tires, twenty-foot long poles, and ladders. You can even pick up enemies that have been knocked down and beat up thier buddies with them.
 * Rival Schools is flush with these. The first game has Natsu and Roberto, both of whom are able to set folks on fire with their volleyball and football/soccer ball attacks (Their classmate Shoma isn't included as his implement of choice can be considered a weapon). The first game's Updated Rerelease adds Ran, a school newspaper report who damages opponents by taking their picture with her camera! And the sequel, Project Justice, introduces Momo, who wreaks havoc with her tennis racket, and Yurika, who uses her violin in her attacks!
 * Don't forget Hinata who kicks the opponent by throwing her infinitly respawning shoes at them.
 * In the Higurashi no Naku Koro ni Daybreak videogame, the characters use a wide variety of weapons that are either dangerous everyday tools or seemingly harmless toys to beat the crap out of each others. These include quite a few water guns, rulers, pieces of chalk, a mop, a golf club, a shovel (used to throw large rocks), a ceremonial hoe, a fire extinguisher that shoots fire, a handsaw, a flying buzzsaw, a large wooden beam, a pot (smashed onto someone's head), a few homing explosive syringes, firecrackers, fireworks, banana peels, a boxing glove on a spring hidden in a cardboard box, the flash from a camera, and a life-sized KFC Colonel Sanders doll apparenty filled with molotov cocktail.
 * Try to guess which were used in the anime and manga to commit grisly murders.
 * Of course, all of these are roughly as effective as the machine guns and bullet-reflecting katanas also present in the game.
 * In the upcoming Postal 3, one of the weapons in the game is apparently a live badger in a harness. Really.
 * Team Fortress 2 has at least one for everyone.
 * Scout: A baseball bat might count, more fitting are the Holy Mackerel (a fish) and the Mad Milk (a bottle of milk).
 * Don't forget the Wrap Assassin, which is a roll of wrapping paper, and the Candy Cane.
 * Soldier: The Equalizer is a pickaxe, and other melee weapons are a frying pan and a shovel.
 * Pyro: You could probably make a case for the Flare Gun, but more fitting is the Degreaser, which is a bunch of car parts taped together to function as a flamethrower.
 * There are also a few of the Pyro's melee weapons, which include the Postal Pummeler (a mailbox), the Back Scratcher (a garden rake), and the Powerjack (a car battery attached to an automobile jack with rubber bands).
 * Demoman: Along with sharing the frying pan, he can wield a bottle of scrumpy.
 * The Ullapool Caber. It's a stick grenade that you're using as a melee weapon. A sober man would throw it.
 * Heavy: The closest the Heavy has is the Killing Gloves of Boxing/Gloves of Running Urgently, which are boxing gloves. Which by themselves doesn't make them odd, since boxing gloves are technically made for fighting, but when you consider that this is a mercenary war involving guns and live ammunition, it immediately looks out of place, especially since you are expected to kill with them.
 * And then comes the Warrior's Spirit, a pair of bear paws the Heavy has strapped over his hands. Gives new meaning to the phrase "I will kill you with BEAR HANDS!!!"
 * Engineer: The wrench. He also has a robot hand, but that's slightly more believable.
 * Not to mention a taunt attack that involves smashing a guitar over your enemy's head.
 * Medic: The Medic wields a bonesaw/some sort of syringe/saw hybrid. He uses both like a knife, though, which pulls them into this.
 * The Sniper: A mason jar filled with (his) urine Jar-based Karate. He also has a Huntsman bow (not an improbable weapon, but an outdated one) and a rifle that fires darts full of his own urine.
 * His taunt attack using the bow and arrow is to stab someone. With an arrow. That has to count for something.
 * The Spy is just about the only one that doesn't have one. But then again, he is the one that's bringing a knife to a gun fight.
 * But now with this christmas update, we have the Spy-cycle, a freaking thin icycle that the spy uses as a knife
 * All that aside, every class can use the Saxxy, a trophy that bears a striking resemblance to an Emmy. This means that the Spy is somehow able to backstab people with a trophy.
 * Among the melee weapons available to the survivors in Left 4 Dead 2 you will find a frying pan and an electric guitar.
 * Lucky Glauber from The King of Fighters series uses a basketball for several of his attacks.
 * Vivi the Sky Witch of Luminous Arc uses a magic lamp that doubles as a machine gun.
 * Don't forget Mel and her giant leaves.
 * Cecille wields a staff before changing class. Sure, that doesn't sound too improbable. However... her staff is taller than her, and she never becomes fatigued from wielding it. (Then again, no characters become fatigued from wielding weapons.)
 * Worth noting is that staff, in this case, means the stereotypical mages staff, with an absurdly large head piece, not just a long wooden cylinder.
 * In Luminous Arc 2, quite a few of the characters do this, so much so that it sometimes seems like the real weapons are the improbable ones (slight exaggeration).
 * We've got Althea, who uses a wand that looks like a duster (along with her magic); Dia, a Musical Assassin of a Witch whose weapon is a conducting baton; Kaph, the Musical Assassin whose guitar fires bullets; Luna, who uses a fan, as I recall; Alice?, who uses a rolling pin; and so on.
 * Let's not forget Pop's whisk, Sadie's trumpet, Josie's fishbone staff...
 * Kyosuke Nanbu's Alt Eisen Rise from Super Robot Wars. Ignoring the improbability of a giant robot, it's necessary to understand the mechanics behind some of the parts - the Tesla Drive that allows a unit to fly, and the Dual Tesla Drive that gives it highly maneuverable and fast flight. The Alt Eisen Riese is equipped with a Dual Tesla Drive, but it can't fly; this is because it's so heavy and awkward that it needs the Dual Tesla Drive to stand up.
 * Its little brother, Battle Moon Wars, has some improbable weapons too. LIKE WARCUIED'S RED MOON! THE MOON!
 * In Legacy of Kain: Defiance a certain cheat code would allow you to give Raziel a cardboard tube to replace the Soul Reaver, in a nod to the Penny Arcade strips about the cardboard tube samurai.
 * Suikoden is full of these. Shovels, book belts, bundles of rope, shawls. Any game in the series will likely have at least half a dozen strange weapons. And they can all be sharpened by the same blacksmith.
 * More fun unconventional weapons from the series: Rings, Nails (as in on the hands), Parasols, Woks and other cooking utensils, wrenches, musical instruments. None of them are in any way Joke Weapons.
 * As a specific example, Viki in V attacks by sneezing. Mind you, it's worse than it sounds, given that said sneeze causes her Blinking Rune to play up and teleport random furniture onto her target's head.. Furniture from the future too, given the look of that lamp.
 * Admitedly, when you have 108 protagonist characters in each game, the conventional combination of Sword, Spear, Axe, etc gets a little dull.
 * The Gaia Online MMORPG zOMG has the players using mystically-enhanced rings to battle, because conventional weapons don't harm the Animated. That alone would qualify for this trope.
 * The rings themselves invoke this trope. Some generate fairly standard BFG, BFS, Frickin' Laser Beams, and shuriken or bows and arrows to attack. Others can be protective Teflon Spray coatings, Pot Lid shields against attack, thrown Hornet's Nests to scare away enemies, or water balloons filled with heavy water.
 * Lastly, Gaia Online's notorious collection of strange accessories for your avatar include more than a few strange weapons.
 * Since they introduced alternate weapon skins in City of Heroes, there's been a few of these available, mainly for the War Mace and Battle Axe powersets. War Mace gets a baseball bat, a shovel and a wrench, while Battle Axe gets the same shovel turned on its side. Your enemies aren't strangers to this either- see the Scrapyarders, why will sometimes use jackhammers against you.
 * And Jurassik, a Devouring Earth giant monster, who uses a car caught in a tree branch as a giant mace.
 * Custom shields add another layer of absurdity by providing a manhole cover to use in place of a conventional shield. Added by player request, no less.
 * Super Punch Out, being a boxing game, shouldn't feature weapons. Nevertheless, one Luchador boxer uses (illegal) wrestling techniques, one boxer uses Jeet Kune Do, one boxer attacks with their Bishonen hair, a clown throws deadly balls, and one particular old man likes to hit you with his walking stick repeatedly. It might be easier to mention the boxers that fight fair. And of course, the ref will never call them on it.
 * The Wii game takes it even further. Aran Ryan's rematch has him cause massive damage with a boxing glove on a rope.
 * Amaterasu, from Okami is a prime example of this, seeing as her 'default' weapon is a large, flaming, mirror, which Amaterasu uses to (literally) beat enemies to death.
 * She also uses bead necklaces. And big swords. The second wouldn't be so weird if, you know, she wasn't a dog.
 * Her son also uses said weapons, and Kagu attacks with fans. Kurow uses the sound from a flute.
 * In the Bloodmoon expansion for Morrowind you can find and use a severed Nord's leg as a bludgeoning weapon.
 * Ty the Tasmanian Tiger has exploding boomerangs, which return to you unharmed after hitting their target and reducing it to rubble. I wish I was making this up...
 * In Medievil, if Sir Dan completes a task for a witch, she gives him a bucket of magic chicken drumsticks. When armed, you can throw them at your opponents, which appears to do nothing, until they suddenly turn into a delicous roast chicken. How that works is an entirely different question.
 * Well, a witch gave you those magical chicken drumsticks, right?
 * Sir Dan also has the capability to take off one of his arms and use it was a weapon. He can either use it as a club or throw it as a boomerang.
 * Lufia: The Legend Returns features several characters wielding Improbable Weapons
 * Seena the fortune teller uses various kinds of crystal balls and magic wands/rods.
 * Ruby the gambler uses playing cards, and many of her IP moves are based on gambling. One of her attacks actually has you play a simple card game in which you guess if the next card will be higher or lower in value than the previous one. The attack starts with a base power equal to your current IP, and doubles with each successful guess. How exactly this is supposed to deal damage is a mystery...
 * Isaac the inventor uses a plethora of strange gadgets, including a music box, a "slay speaker," and a machine simply called "Custom 65."
 * Aima the martial artist typically wields "fists" - apparently special gauntlets designed to increase the effectiveness of punches. One variant you can find is called the "Rocket Fist," which presumably uses rocket boosters to speed up the punch (or possibly even launch Aima at the foe? The battle animations offer little insight into the exact mechanics of the combat).
 * In Lufia 2 Rise of the Sinistrals the inventor, Lexis Shaia, uses a variety of tools as weapons, including the memorably named 'vice pliers'.
 * Will, the main character in the Super Nintendo game Illusion of Gaia, uses a flute to bash enemies.
 * There is some unusual ways of beating Ganondorf. In The Legend of Zelda Ocarina of Time, you can take down Ganon with . Also, in The Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess,
 * Well, what would you do if some idiot pulled that trick? Even if he isn't remembering Ocarina and figuring you're gonna do something insane with it (er, more insane than it is already), he's probably going "Wait...what?"
 * Likewise, using an empty bottle against Ganondorf's projectiles in the first fight against him in Ocarina of Time actually works! When fighting the wizard in The Legend of Zelda a Link To T He Past, the Bug Catching Net can also reflect the projectiles back. The net is also Link's Joke Weapon in Soul Calibur 2.
 * The empty bottle trick works in Twilight Princess too.
 * Several Wild Arms games have at least one character fitting this trope.
 * Lilka (umbrellas) and Marivel (Hob and Gob, two little robot thingies) in Wild Arms 2.
 * Arnaud (feathers) and Yulie (a set of three hoops) in Wild Arms 4.
 * Wild Arms XF has a ton of weirdness: iron fans (Arcanist), books (Elementalist), spanners/wrenches (Gadgeteers), bells (Fantastica), slingshots (Excavator), batons (Martial Mage), and some weird three-winged throwing blade (Stormrider).
 * Blue Dragon has you using your own shadow to fight for you. This isn't much of a problem, except one of the characters is actually an experienced swordsman (well, swordswoman), yet never uses her sword in combat.
 * Fallout 3 has plenty of regular items you can pick up and use as melee weapons - including a tire iron, a board with nails in it, a baseball bat, a lead pipe, a sledge hammer, a pool cue, and a rolling pin.
 * There is a whole weapon crafting profession you can take on whereby you can build surprisingly effective weapons from assorted junk and garbage.
 * You have the railway rifle which fires railway spikes which you build from a pressure cooker, a crutch, a steam gauge assembly and a fission battery.
 * You can build your very own Flaming Sword using a lawnmower blade, an oven pilot light and a motorcycle gas tank.
 * There is also a poison dart gun which you build out of a paint gun, a child's toy car and dartboard darts dipped in mutated scorpion venom.
 * And the king of all improvised weapons, the Rock-it Launcher! Built out of a vacuum cleaner and a few other assorted parts, you can feed almost any random piece of garbage into it as ammo and it will fire the junk at lethal speeds at a target. Because of the physics engine of the game, small, heavy objects like billiard balls are best - but even objects like teddy bears can decapitate an opponent when fired with the launcher!
 * A fan mod allows you to wield a fire hydrant.
 * In Billy Hatcher and the Giant Egg all the weapons are (if you could not guess from the title), eggs. It is slightly strange though in the fact that you can use eggs to break fences, crush enimies, and smash rocks, yet if an egg touches some thorns, it'll crack.
 * Throughout Castle Crashers players can find and use several strange objects as weapons. The list includes a frozen chicken, a dead fish, a lobster, umbrella, pumpkin peeler, carrot, golden key, a branch, a vine, a wooden spoon, a skeleton leg, the gun from Alien Hominid, a unicorn's horn, a steak, a sausage, a lollipop, a candlestick, a fishing rod, a wrench, and a leaf. these can be found from killing enemies, blowing up walls, or digging them up with a shovel.
 * In fact, even the shovel can be used to damage enemies.
 * Don't forget the horn, which can deal serious damage and fling enemies into the air with a single note.
 * Maria Renard from the Castlevania franchise tosses rapid-fire doves, kittens, or dragons at the enemy. She also uses a turtle shell as armor.
 * Aeon from Judgment fights with something that can only be described as a clock-spear. It's a clock with a pointed blade attached to it.
 * In Portrait of Ruin, the best subweapon to use against  is a cream pie.
 * And in Aria of Sorrow, using the Killer Mantle soul causes Soma to hit enemies with a piece of cloth, dealing a little damage and switching the enemy's HP and MP. Since Golems have no MP, this makes Killer Mantle a one-hit kill on otherwise nigh-indestructible enemies, such as Iron Golems.
 * The soul system in the Sorrow games in general can approach this, such as the Skeleton Waiter soul, which uses curries to kill enemies. The Yeti soul can make you roll up a snowball to attack enemies with too.
 * In Metal Gear Solid 3 you can kill guards with a friggin' Fork - even Signit Lampshades this trope by asking why the hell Snake is carrying it with him.
 * In Metal Gear Solid: Peace Walker, you can hold up guards with a banana.
 * Between the two Touhou fighter games, the character Yukari Yakumo, whose power allows her to creates holes in space (gaps) that allow for instantaneous movement from one place to another, makes effective use of a strange arsenal: dropped statues, road signs, and a train. Yes, a train. She also uses her umbrella as a weapon.
 * Komachi Onozuka uses coins as Danmaku.
 * In many fanworks, Yuka Kazami uses blooming sunflowers to unnerving and occasionally deadly effect.
 * Alice Margatroid fights using dolls. This is far more awesome than it sounds.
 * And how can we forget Aya, who, in Shoot the Bullet and Double Spoiler, defeats bosses by taking pictures of them. You take pictures of bosses, and after you've taken enough, they blow up. We wish we were kidding.
 * In the newest game, Unidentified Fantastic Object, we have Ichirin Kumoi, who attacks you with...a cloud. This is not only far more awesome than it sounds, it is undeniably the manliest thing you will ever see in Gensokyo. That and the fact that the giant fists he throws at you are the biggest single "bullet" you ever have to dodge in a Touhou game make this fight pure win.
 * It's just too bad that Unzan, the cloud, has become more popular than Kumoi herself.
 * In the first Touhou game, Highly Responsive to Prayers, Reimu's only real method of attack was a giant yin-yang yo yo. Granted, this was before Touhou became a bullet hell game, and the first game is notorious for its differences to the others in the first place, but...
 * Iku Nagae has a literal Scarf of Asskicking.
 * The heroes of Superhero League of Hoboken tend to obtain and use a wide variety of weapons over the course of the game, from pointy sticks and rusty nails, to cyanide-laced silly string, tee-ball set, and arsenic-dipped deer antlers, to devastating weapons like the dobermann, the modified jet engine and the nest of trained hornets. TRAINED HORNETS.
 * Lina from Riviera the Promised Land is a master of fruit-fu, being the only character of the four-girls-and-a-guy band who can use Overskills with Banangos and Applecots.
 * The titular character of The Twisted Tales of Spike McFang fights monsters by spinning his cape and throwing his hat like a boomerang.
 * In League of Legends, as an in-universe example of a Game Breaker, legendary warrior Jax is so powerful and skilled that league officials only allow him to fight with a lampost. His Ascended Fanboy follower Urf tries to imitate him with a spatula and a fish. Twisted Fate fights with playing cards. Anne the Creepy Child transforms her teddy bear into a monster to maul people.
 * Genzo of Daiku no Gensan (Better known in the US as Harry of Hammerin Harry) normally falls under Drop the Hammer... but in Hammerin' Hero, he gets alternate jobs which give him access to some improbable weapons. At the normal end is a baseball bat. Others include things like records, boomboxes, sushi, whole raw fish, anchors...
 * In Shadow of Rome, once you've decapitated someone, you can pick up their head and hit people with it.
 * In Mana Khemia Alchemists of Al Revis, the main character Vayne attacks with his cat (assuming the form of a katar and a BFS). Jessica uses her bag (wich has everything inside it, and one of her spells can drop swordfishs on the enemies. And the ghost Pamela uses her mana-possessed stuffed teddy bear as a weapon. Oh, of course, we have cards (Roxis), mecha-swords which can shoot, fire and throw shurikens (Flay) and an alien pod (Muppy).
 * In the sequel, Mana Khemia 2 Fall of Alchemy, it is just as bad. We have books that are alive (Chloe), hoops (Etward), a giant robot fist (Enarsia), her magical maid (Liliane), her 3 Puni 'brothers' this worlds version of slimes (Puniyo), and a toy ball (Gotou). You could also incluse the shapeshifting morning star and sword of light (Ulrika and Razeluxe). The only real weapons are claws (Yun) and a ten foot mace! (Pepperoncino).
 * Cornet, the main character from Rhapsody a Musical Adventure, uses a trumpet as a weapon.
 * Ryu Hayabusa from Ninja Gaiden has a few questionable weapons in the X Box game series. In the first game, he aquires a wooden bokuto which requires about 7 upgrades until the shop owner Muramasa forges the damn thing into an oar.
 * In the second game, he comes into the possession of a Kusari-gama, or two sickles connected by a freakishly long chain that varies in length with the environment, an enormous scythe, a weapon called the Falcon's Talons (Claws similar to Wolverine's not only for his hands but for his feet as well), and when you upgrade the Lunar Staff fully, on each end of the staff are maces that flail about on a chain.
 * In addition to Ryu's primary weapons, he can acquire a gatling spear gun, a weapon that uses multiple barrels, a crank, and a water pump to fire harpoons at incredible speeds through water. What makes the whole thing even more improbable is that the weapon itself was invented before the technology behind it even existed. The description lampshades said fact.
 * In the adventure game BioForge, at the very beginning the protagonist can bludgeon a psychotic character to death with the victim's own severed arm.
 * In the Nintendo DS remake of Dragon Quest V, Debora uses press-on fingernails to devastating effect.
 * In Eternal Sonata, Frederic Chopin uses a conductor's baton as an offensive weapon. Polka wields an umbrella.
 * Painkiller has a gun that shoots Shurikens and lightning. To quote Ben "Yahtzee" Crowshaw from Zero Punctuation, "It could only be more awesome if it had tits and was on fire."
 * Lets not forget the gun that shoots sharpened fenceposts that pin enemies to the wall, as well as grenades
 * One weapon in Cave Story gets weaker when powered up - when fully leveled, it shoots rubber duckies.
 * Not to mention the Bubbler, a gun that shoots bubbles. It works about as well as you'd expect, though the fully-upgraded version creates bubbles that release shuriken when they pop.
 * Resident Evil 5 has a large number of chickens running around (just like in its predecessor). If you leave these things alone long enough, they will lay eggs which can be eaten to heal your wounds. Alternatively, they can be equipped by the player to be thrown like grenades. If they hit an enemy in the face, the enemy will be stunned long enough to be hit with a special melee attack (e.g. kick or straight). RE 5, however, adds in the "rotten egg" which WILL NOT heal you and instead takes your right down to "dying" status if you are foolish enough to eat it. Its deadly power can be a boon since if you throw it at a regular enemy, it will be a one-hit kill and you don't even have to hit them in the mouth.
 * In Resident Evil 0, Billy uses his handcuffs (one bracelet's on his wrist, the other isn't) as brass knuckles to punch a Devestator (a mutated zombie gorilla) in a cutscene.
 * The game Chex Quest starts you off with the "Bootspoon", which, you guessed it, is a spoon. It can be upgraded, however, to the "Super Boot Spork," essentially an electric spork. The "Super Boot Spork" is, in fact, an excellent weapon, as, when jabbed, it does not have to be pulled back, leaving the enemy in a helpless state of constant recoil until defeated.
 * Lego Island 2 has protagonist Pepper Roni using throwing pizzas at enemy Bricksterbots, which for some reason causes them to explode. Later, the Brickster modifies the design so that they can no longer be killed this way, so Pepper uses a boombox to make the Bricksterbots dance faster and faster until they collapse from exhaustion or dizziness. Then he hits them with a pizza and they explode.
 * Fable 2 has a wanted sheet with the charge was "Assault with a weapon that no one thought was fatal but tragically was".
 * The original Fable has a sub-quest that lets you find a frying pan for use as a weapon....albeit one with 100 damage points and four augmentation spots. The trick, however, is to have all six clues to its whereabouts before you dig it up; if you cheat (or dig it up unintentionally) and skip gathering all of the clues, the frying pan will have no augmentation slots or damage points whatsoever.
 * In the Mourningwood section of Fable III, one of the soldiers will be bashing Hollow Men with a lute. "I never knew hollow men had such great acoustics!" indeed...
 * In Sengoku Basara, most of the characters are Improbable Weapon Users. A few notable examples are:Motochika's freaking anchor which he also uses to surf, Itsuki's huge hammer, and Masamune, who fights with 6 katanas!(Amusingly enough, he's voiced by the same seiyuu as Zoro)
 * The Joke Items take this even further.
 * Prince of Persia: Warrior Within had several joke weapons, including a teddy bear, a lawn flamingo, a glove, and a glow-in-the-dark sword.
 * The Worms series, which has featured such weapons as the Exploding Sheep, the Old Granny, and the Concrete Donkey. No, seriously.
 * All hail the Concrete Donkey, the most terrifying Weapon of Ass Destruction of all time!
 * And lets not forget the original "weird weapon" of Worms. The banana bomb. A replacement for the cluster grenade that could only be found by picking up crates. Instead of the usual cluster, it explodes into a lot of bananas that explode with a force comparable to the stick of dynamite, making it the single most destructive weapon in the entire (first) game!
 * Conker from Conkers Bad Fur Day uses a Frying Pan of Doom most of the time(except in the Spooky chapter in which he uses a shotgun).
 * In Mabinogi almost any tool can be used as a weapon. Not only the already weapon like gathering-axes, cooking knives, sickles, and blacksmith hammers; but also metallurgy (ore panning) sieves, cooking ladles, fishing rods, and L-rods (magic dowsing rods). All tools have a damage rate that is lower than bare-hand damage. However, nearly all wieldable tools can be upgraded to make them effective, if still low-powered, weapons.
 * Musical instruments can, however, actually be half-decent.
 * Event weapons (the ones which aren't simply alternate versions of normal weapons) are typically either effective but silly-looking ordinary weapons, toy versions of common weapons, or special-purpose weapons which are magical and/or elaborately improbably. An example of the first type is the "cat paw club", a club weapon with very good damage stats, shaped like a giant furry cat's paw. The second type have lower stats than their normal versions -- eg. toy boy and arrow set has lower damage and shorter range than any standard bow. Examples of the third type are the ice sword (a sword made from an ice crystal); and a(n edible) magic wand made from a giant pocky stick, that turns monsters into giant edible cookies.
 * Special weapons invariably have a limited lifespan; either through deliberate time limits (the ice sword melted after the end of the event), or by making them unrepairable.
 * Runescape has several strange weapons, including a rubber chicken and flowers.
 * The Dark Cloud series includes several of these, the most notorious being the Frozen Tuna.
 * Max even lampshades this in Dark Chronicle, taking out his wrench and saying, "I usually use this to fix stuff but it makes a pretty good weapon too." (Naturally it builds up into maces and hammers that are not quite so improbable when you consider how much that can hurt...there's a reason Clue had a Wrench listed as one of the weapons)
 * In Pokémon Red and Blue, Farfetch'd uses a leek.
 * Some of the moves make use of improbable weapons as well; Grass Knot ties a grass knot around the foe's leg to cause them to trip, Octozooka is a giant blast of ink, and Solar Beam is a laser...fueled by sunlight.
 * Darkrai's 'Bad Dreams'. K Oing a pokemon, possibly a LEGENDARY, with NIGHTMARES. For that matter, the move 'Dream Eater'.
 * There's also the Oshawott series, who use shells as makeshift swords. Oshawott has the one, Dewott dual wields, and Samurott's are sheathed in his forelimbs. One particular piece of fanart shows Samurott taking his helmet off as an impromptu BFS before making a swarm of haters disappear in a fine red mist.
 * The Timburr line (Timburr, Gurdurr, and Conkeldurr) uses, respectively, a 2x4, a gurder, and two cement pillars as weapons.
 * The move "fling" lets your pokemon use whatever item they're holding as a weapon by throwing it at the opponent. It's advised that you use an item that can deal a lot of damage, but you can easily stock up on though. This can be averted if your pokemon knows recycle, but chances are you might accidentally take out your opponent with fling before you have a chance to do anything else.
 * In the Manga, Mewtwo fights with a giant spoon. In the games, Alakazam and Kadabra wield spoons as well (though more for show.)
 * In the Manga section earlier, the spoons supposedly increase their psychic power.
 * Dead Rising has water guns, CDs, cash registers, King Salmon, chairs...if you can lift it, you can use it as a weapon.
 * The sequel includes the same anything-you-can-lay-your-hands-on arsenal, plus new Combo Weapons. These ranges from an RC helicopter with machetes on the blades, to a kayak paddle with chainsaws taped to either end.
 * The trademark weapon of Opoona is the "Energy Bon Bon." It resembles a small rubber ball, which can be equipped with elemental effects and special upgrades.
 * A few fighters in Battle Fantasia use unorthodox weapons, such as Olivia's flag, and Catgirl waitress Coyori's plates and pies.
 * Die By The Sword allows you to sever the limbs of your enemies, pick them up, and use them against them.
 * Hakuoro's primary weapon in Utawarerumono is a pair of steel fans used for both attacking and defense. Which was a real weapon.
 * Tesse the super powered robot maid in Waku Waku 7 is the game's resident Improbable Weapon User, wielding brooms, giant syringes, and built-in floor buffers. And that's without even getting into her projectile attack, which allows her to throw different objects depending on how long you charge the attack. These range from the practical (Bullet Bills, giant bombs) to the improbable (cups and dishes) to the downright absurd (potted cacti, geese and small dogs.)
 * Baten Kaitos has Gibari, who fights with oars, and an interesting variation with Lyude. On screen, Lyude uses a rifle as a weapon, but all of his attack magnus are of various brass musical instruments, which are still described as if they were firearms.
 * Not actually used as a weapon, per se, but Godot from Phoenix Wright: Trials and Tribulations has been known to chuck his coffee mug at Phoenix's head with unerring accuracy; Maya refers to them as "coffee grenades".
 * No More Heroes. Those few that make any sense at all are improbable as weapons of assassination, or weapons meant to be operated by a single person period. First game has, in order of encounters, a giant straight razor with energy properties and doppelganger spin, explosive bullets, sword beams, a crotch laser, a rocket launcher as a replacement leg, a multi-story experimental military earthquake generator operated by a giant brain, props more typical for a magic show, a ridiculously large wave motion gun, gimps, and a lightsaber dragon thingy. Second game has
 * Zombie Panic has, among more believeable weapons, frying pans, cooking pots, wrenches, metal chairs and COMPUTER KEYBOARDS.
 * That last one's not unbelievable if the keyboard in question is an IBM Model M or similar vintage Tonka Tough keyboard, back when they had solid steel plates for reinforcement. You could still type on it afterward after bashing someone's skull in with it, I'm sure.
 * In Bunny Must Die, Chelsea has a spell that produces a ladder. This is not only her only attack that lets her hit things above her head, but is the most damaging attack she has.
 * Rose from Street Fighter fights with her scarf.
 * Elona has plenty, female underwear, raw weapons in which you can actually eat, and, if you manage to find it, a piano
 * In .hack, the Macabre Dancer class uses fans, the Shadow Warlock class uses Grimoires (although they use them more for spellcasting), and Edge Punishers are able to equip swords that are twice the size of the person wielding them, and some flavors of these swords act like chainsaws (same with with the Twin Blade and Blade Brandier classes as well).
 * Klonoa uses his Wind Ring, typically powered by one of his friends, which shoots a Wind Bullet out that inflates enemies like balloons and allows him to use them as projectiles.
 * Space Quest: Roger's used some really creative methods of taking out enemies. The jock-strap and hand puzzle used against a Labion terror beast, short-circuiting guard robots with the sprinkler system, using local wildlife when taking out a collection droid, using a boulder, and a Banana In the Tailpipe against another collection droid, liquid nitrogen and a crowbar against a third killer robot, a shag rug and static electricity against a kidnapper, and a rotting fish against the Big Bad of the sixth game.
 * In Assassin's Creed Brotherhood, some of the multiplayer characters have unusual weapons. Most notably, the Engineer, who assassinates people with a sharpened compass.
 * James in Wandering Hamster uses an infinite supply of Spam cans as weapon. There's also Dusty who uses bones and eponymous Bob the Hamster who can use fish instead of hammers.
 * The Gravity Gun in Half-Life 2 allows the player to turn anything in to an instrument of death. When it becomes your only weapon in the final chapter, you have to resort to picking up any item that isn't nailed down and hurling it at the oncoming Combine.
 * One of the Steam achievements available in Half-Life 2 requires the player to kill someone by launching a toilet at them with the Gravity Gun.
 * WWF No Mercy included a lot of the already used improbable weapons already mentioned in the Professional Wrestling section. It also included weapons improbable for even the wrestling industry's standards, such as a giant plastic block of cheese and a huge copy of The Rock's book The Rock Says.
 * Mole Mania gives Muddy Mole no direct means of offense, forcing him to avoid enemies...or throw objects at them. Said objects can be black balls, barrels, or cabbages, all bigger than Muddy himself is. When's the last time YOU killed something with a cabbage?
 * The ASHPD in Portal seems more like a Utility Weapon rather than improbable, until you use it to !
 * Tales of Monkey Island:
 * Mega Man himself is probably the grand master of this trope. Fire, bombs, and even armor-piercing needles are logical enough along with the normal plasma and lasers, but sawblades, steerable boxing gloves, and globs of quick-dry cement?
 * If vehicles in Prototype, the destroyed remains of military hardware should be. Oh, and throwable living beings.
 * Hoo boy. Exit Fate has wielders of a designer purse, two books, a fan, a walking cane, a sceptre, playing cards, a paintbrush, razorwire, a harp, a pencil, a monster tooth, a metal chain and a Holy Water Sprinkler.
 * All but one of the Fatal Frame characters have only the camera they carry with them as weapon. The exception character uses a flashlight.
 * Technically speaking, every weapon in RedAlert 3 is factory-built, but you wouldn't know it by looking at them. The stranger ones: Allied dogs and Soviet War Bears can use stun roars; Soviet tanks use "leech-beams" that suck armor off enemy vehicles and their Apocalypse Tanks feature Tractor Beams specifically built to allow them to run over other tanks, to say nothing of their Tesla (read: lightning gun) weapons; the Allies have a helicopter (and, in Uprising, an infantryman) that fire beams of cold and have shrink rays; and the Rising Sun fields ninja, complete with throwing stars, plus Energy Bow troopers and tiny flying robots that can self-destruct. Honorable mention: the Soviet Bullfrog's Man Cannon, which is not a weapon but a means of transport.
 * Micah of Rune Factory 3: Of the many items he can weaponize and take into battle: carrots, daikon radishes, pineapples, leeks, soup ladles, backscratchers, a giant lollipop and a whole tuna. All of which of fairly strong mid-level weapons and a couple of which are used by some of your NPC companions.
 * There was some game for the Xbox where your primary weapon was a coffin. Unfortunately, I can't recall the title for the life of me.
 * In Skullgirls, Valentine's arsenal is strictly medical equipment. IVs, Bodybags, scalpels, defibrillators, bonesaws; and being a ninja nurse, she demonstrates unthinkable proficiency with them.
 * In Minecraft, while swords and bows (and tools) are the only practical weapons, it is theoretically possible to beat a monster to death with a torch, bed, or a pumpkin. Best of all, items without durability don't even get damaged by using them as improvised weapons.
 * Dark Souls' Havel the Rock wields the Dragon Tooth club a... dragon tooth, which is impressively heavy and unendingly durable. It also has a good shot of killing you in one hit.
 * In The Fancy Pants Adventure: World 3, Fancy Pants Man obtains a pencil as a weapon halfway through the game. The game world is based off of doodles and scribbles, so a pencil makes a certain sort of sense.
 * Alpha Protocol's Steven Heck is reputed to have carried out assassinations using Communion wafers, soccer balls, and a ten-speed mountain bike, which he somehow managed to lodge in the victim's abdomen.
 * In Kingdoms of Amalur Reckoning, the entire world is governed by fate. However, thanks to an experiment, the main character is Immune to Fate and can manipulate fate around him/her in many ways. The Reckoning finishing moves involve the Fateless One physically manifesting an opponent's fate and beating them to death it.

Webcomics
""Zeetha, why are you using a shovel instead of your swords?"
 * A pizza. Yes, people...a pizza...
 * Lampshaded in this Girl Genius strip:

"Silly girl! You can't dig a hole with swords!""

""You just said 'No weapons.'"
 * and here during the Bar fight:

"That wasn't a weapon, that was a chair."

"Well then, give me a chair!""

""Tankard! Not a weapon!""
 * This one continues on the next page.

""Ghost Cop got a gun that shoots a tornado of bullets and unicorns. Sockarang got a gun that will shoot whatever you want onto you. Axe Cop got a plunger."
 * Ax Crazy pirate queen Bangladesh Dupree is tasked with guard duty and told to kill anyone who enters the room unauthorized. She asks if she is allowed to use any weapon she wants; the list includes cheese.
 * Othar Tryggvassen, "Gentleman Adventurer!" is apparently skilled in Norwegian Sweater Fighting.
 * Agatha hits an opponent with a book. An book entitled 'Using Found Objects as Weapons'.
 * Sword-Chucks,yo!
 * In VG Cats, "It's a rat-flail!"
 * Ahem, "Rat Morning Star"
 * Problem Sleuth. Grand Piano Scythe! Bowen Stilson Dogg Bust Scythe! Teaspoon Scythe! Ugly Dog Scythe! Fancy Santa Scythe! A-BOMB SCYTHE!
 * And those are just the Gambit Schema attacks for one character. The regular weapons include a set of keys (revolver), a tube of lipstick (chainsaw), a paint roller (taser), paint stripper (flamethrower), a hairpin (machine gun), a teddy bear (knife), a sextant (sniper rifle), and a typewriter (the series' Infinity Plus One Tommy Gun). Thanks to the Good Bad Bug Running Gag, anything can be a lethal weapon.
 * Lots of this pops up during the battle with DMK too. Cinderblocks, stone busts, crates and barrels, candy, and even  Pickle Inspector are used as weapons. It's safe to say that MS Paint Adventures practically runs on this trope and What Do You Mean It's Not Awesome?.
 * Speaking of MS Paint Adventures, Rose Lalonde from the latest adventure Homestuck uses knitting needles as a weapon.
 * Also from Homestuck, Mr. Egbert's weapons of choise are cakes and SHAVING CREAM.
 * The STRIFE SPECIBUS is pretty much made of this trope, as almost anything can be used as a weapon, from crowbars to fancy santas and stuffed plush bunny. Bro rivals Mr. Egbert up there, by using Lil' Cal in his fight against Dave. He also knows the art of "weaponizing a sylladex", or loading it with heavy items to be expelled as projectile weaponry when needed.
 * Strife Specibi use normal stuff like Gunkind and Swordkind, as well as things like Dicekind and Canekind.
 * And now, Spoonkind.
 * Close examination of the back of John's STRIFE SPECIBUS before he sets it to Hammerkind reveals that ice skates, gloves, aerosoles, and more are all possible weapons.
 * In ''The Adventures of Dr. McNinja, Dr. McNinja at one point uses frozen shamrocks as shuriken, which he found very...ridiculous.
 * During the Ultimate Battle arc of Axe Cop, Uni-Man developed some new weapons.

"Tailsteak: In terms of D&D stats, the Halligan bar would be considered an improvised weapon for anyone else (-4 penalty), but Jamie is considered proficient in its use. It does d6 damage, which can be bludgeoning, slashing or piercing. Jamie's particular copy is considered masterwork."
 * Later, Axe Cop takes that plunger and sticks a zombie's head onto it. Behold.
 * And speaking of guns, there's the green banana gun.
 * Some of Axe Cop's "secret attacks" revealed through the "Ask Axe Cop" series are insane, too. The origin of the phrase "secret attack" comes when he defuses a hypothetical situation with lies and poisons. Many of Axe Cop's secret attacks are poisonous, such as the poison blow-up juice; the ability to have food he's just eaten reappear in his hands, but laced with poison; and one of Axe Cop's favorite kills, the "poisonous flower attack". Axe Cop also has an ancestor named Book Cop; he fights with books.
 * Hanna of Hanna Is Not a Boy's Name tries to face supernatural monsters with a cheap hammer and... a magic marker.
 * In Questionable Content when Martin and Steve are attacked by the vigilante Vespavenger they defend themselves with what's on hand, a stop sign and a trash can lid. Lampshades JRPGs when Martin comments,"I am nowhere near effeminate or spiky haired enough for this.
 * The stop sign makes a reappearance, along with a broom, when Martin, Faye, and Dora confront the Vespavenger.
 * In Buck Godot: Zap Gun for Hire, we have the Hoffmanite Throwing Fork and the apparently more dangerous Spoon.
 * Xykon once killed an entire room full of elite paladins with a bouncy ball. Granted, it had a symbol of insanity on it, causing them to attack each other, but still, a freaking bouncy ball!
 * Thog demonstrates the kick-in-the-door style.
 * Belkar, armed with a pebble, delivers a Shout-Out to the Chronicles of Riddick scene in the film folder.
 * MSF High: Donvovan is forced to be one of these by his sword. Yo-yo, Frying Pan, anything BUT "sword"!
 * In Shortpacked we have Amber who wields a vicious pushy-popcorn-ball-popper-thingy.
 * Dead Winter: Liz and her mop, to an almost epic degree.
 * Schlock of Schlock Mercenary once used a lump of battleship plate against an enemy, fulfilling both this trope and Shield-Bash (which is what said plate had been used for until then).
 * Schlock himself is an improbable weapon.
 * Zac in What the Fu practices a martial art called "Tie Chi". Guess what his weapon of choice is.
 * The Bike Ninja in Yehuda Moon and The Kickstand Cyclery throws cassette cogs instead of ninja stars.
 * In Paranatural, the "tools" used by the activity club to fight monsters include such things as paintbrushes and books.
 * This Adventurers strip, featuring a rolled up newspaper swung with such force as to leave its victims in flames.
 * Leftover Soup protagonist Jamie Halligan wields a Halligan bar.

Web Original
"See the note I left on Team Fortress 2"
 * Good old Christian Brutal Sniper is fond of this. He's used a chocolate bar to kill someone before.
 * The Horribly Slow Murderer With the Extremely Inefficient Weapon
 * In Xombie Dirge's favored weapon is a shovel.


 * Madness Combat has Tricky, a super-evil-zombie Clown, who wields a....stopsign that was used by the protagonist to nail him to a giant marshmallow.
 * Although he doesn't have a specific Weapon of Choice, Terrence of Kate Modern usually favours fairly improbable weapons, ranging from an ordinary stick to a freezer van. Occasionally these are improvised weapons, but more often than not they aren't, and you get the impression he's just enjoying himself.
 * Chaka, in the Whateley Universe, uses regular playing cards and some forks. Lancer has a pair of paper swords (which he can cover with his PK field, making them incredibly dangerous). Generator has a Hello Kitty compact which is not at all what it seems.
 * Generator is too Crazy Awesome to stop there. She has weaponized hair decs! And a stuffed cabbit that has taken down grown men in armor!
 * A very popular phenomenon among fan-created characters for existing series. Yes, that double-ended scythe or windmill-blade-katana-thing your OC has for a Bankai/Soul Resonance/Innocence/whatever may look cool in that one picture... but it would be an absolute pig to wield in an actual fight.
 * Due to the sick sense of humour of Danya in Survival of the Fittest, bobble-head dolls and plastic hammers have been known to come into play as assigned weapons.
 * The most infamous use of this trope is Damien Carter-Madisen's pot lid, which he used to perform a curb stomp.
 * Super-assassin Demise, from the Global Guardians PBEM Universe has this as a super-power. Literally anything, in her hands, can be used as a weapon. If she is armed with something that is already a weapon, she becomes the deadliest fighter on the planet. If she's armed with something that normally couldn't be considered a weapon by any sane man (in the past, she's killed people with a plastic spork, a comb, a snow globe, a smiley-face button, greeting cards, paperback books, chopsticks, cellular phones, toothpicks, paper clips, rubber bands, and music CDs) she also becomes the deadliest fighter on the planet. Of course, while she's a highly trained martial artist and has a body any Olympic-level athlete would love to possess, she's also just a Badass Normal. She tried to do that "deadliest fighter in the world" thing on Ultra-Man, and he just smirked and knocked her out with a flick of his finger.
 * Tom Foolery from the same setting uses weaponized toys, including machine-gun armed teddy-bears, explosive rubber balls, sharpened jacks that he throws like shurikens, acid-filled water-guns, and so on.
 * As her name suggests, Yo-Yo is an expert at using a yo-yo as a weapon. Lots of superheroes who laughed at her ended up bruised and battered.
 * Oddball juggles billiard balls. And throws them with amazing accuracy.
 * In the final battle between gamers and reviewers, The Nostalgia Chick weaponizes the Big Lipped Alligator Moment. I kid you not.
 * Shakila the smart gal in 3rd RP of the Darwin's Soldiers universe has used everything from a nail gun to a laptop computer to a screwdriver as a weapon.
 * Drake from New Divide uses a flute as his weapon of choice.
 * In Elemental Wind Elemental Selah uses the sharpened edge of her shield as a weapon. Another character fitting this trope is Corah, who wields a farmer's scythe.
 * Agents in the Anti Cliche and Mary Sue Elimination Society use a lot of different weapons: Claire uses pinecones (yes, you read that right), Marcus sometimes uses an umbrella, Tyler uses a three foot long Lego axle, Tom uses a shrubbery, and Stephen once beat a Sue into submission using a payphone.

Western Animation

 * Pretty much ALL KND operatives. They have 2x4 Weaponry. At the least, too.
 * The Transformers franchise has wound up with a number of these, generally being something fairly unremarkable when they're transformed.
 * A number of Transformers with helicopter alt-modes as of late have the ability to use the rotors as weapons in robot mode. These include Bulkhead from Energon, Evac from Cybertron, Blackout from the 2007 movie and Megatron from Animated (although he cheats by actually turning his blades into swords).
 * In what could be a deliberate inversion, the Animated version of Blackout shoots his rear rotor out as a disc weapon.
 * A great many Transformers with animal alt-modes can use their tails as whip-like weapons once transformed. Some even have something particularly nasty at the end, like a blade or a big spiked ball.
 * Engines forming guns. This happens a lot.
 * And, of course, anyone whose transformation leaves them with their alt-mode's head on one of their hands has a pretty nasty weapon. Not only can its jaws clamp down hard in close-range combat, but it can usually shoot some sort of beam attack as well.
 * The epitome of this, though, has got to be the Breastforce, from the Japanese-only series Victory. Their robot modes have chestplates than can be removed to turn into little robo-animal partners or hand-held guns.
 * Prowl; hubcaps into shurikens. Jazz; tailpipes into nunchucks. That is all.
 *  Lightsaber Nunchucks
 * The majority of the Transformers Animated Autobots use improvised weaponry (grappling hooks, wrecking balls, welders) to one degree or another. This is topped by Ratchet, whose most powerful weapons are essentially powered-up medical equipment.
 * In the Animated continuity, pretty much all of the Autobots are pulling this one off. They're a work force forced into war, so it makes sense that they would use the tools of their trade.
 * American Maid, from The Tick, uses her shoes as weapons. Unlike Jian above, she does throw them, and they apparently have some pretty pointy heels. She would occasionally use her tiara as a weapon, as well.
 * To say nothing of Captain Musilage, Babyboomerangotan and.... THE HUMAN BULLET!
 * Don't forget the woman who can shoot poodles out of a poodle gun.
 * The Box Ghost in Danny Phantom uses boxes, cardboard, and anything square. Although sometimes he will use contents inside the box, one of which had very, very sharp scalpels. He also uses bubble wrap. Ember McLain has many functions for her guitar, but when she runs out of option, it doubles as her choice weapon. Technus uses 21st century machinery at his disposal, including, but not limited to computers, cars, satellites, and even an online video game.
 * Also, one of the Fenton weapons is an ordinary baseball bat...with the word "Fenton" on it.
 * Adam West's Cat Launcher in an episode of Family Guy.
 * And who can forget Quick Draw McGraw's alter-ego El Kabong whose weapon of choice is a guitar... nothing special, just a regular guitar he that he uses to beat folks about the head and shoulders.
 * Lampshaded in an episode of Harvey Birdman, Attorney at Law when Quick Draw is arrested for hitting a man with his guitar and is charged with assault with a deadly weapon, leading to a courtroom debate about the right to bear guitars.
 * Made even funnier as his voice actor intentionally spoke like Antonio Banderas from Desperado.
 * Various Veggie Tales episodes feature a mop, ballistic pies and dodgeballs used as weapons.
 * The French Peas of Jericho dropped slushies at the Hebrew veggies.
 * Wakfu has a few: of the mains, Ruel fights with a shovel, and Amalia has a vegetable doll. One of the minor characters fights with a baker's plate.
 * An episode of Invader Zim saw Dib fighting in a cage match in order to see his father. He had a choice of improbable improbable weapons, including a giant corkscrew, and giant cotton swab. Dib, however, chose the giant Turkey Baster.
 * Bishop of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is arguably a Badass version of this, as he uses everything around him as a weapon to even the odds in a fight. He goes from taking the turtle's weapons, to using a baseball bat, to using his own necktie.
 * The Kyoshi Warriors of Avatar: The Last Airbender use hand fans.
 * Normally, a sword does not meet the standards for an Improbable Weapon. However, it does in the movie Tangled, where the wielder is a horse. And that's not even getting into Rapunzel's Frying Pan of Doom.
 * An episode of Futurama had Ben Franklin's Franklinator, which is essentially an animal (usually a badger) tied to a stick. However, Bender receives one with a small shark, and Fry gets a chipmunk.
 * In the pilot of Jackie Chan Adventures, Jackie beat off the Dark Hand Enforcers with a pair of windshield wipers.

Real Life

 * Medieval polearms got their origins from farming implementations.
 * Hans Talhoffer's fighting manual from 15th century Germany deals on fighting with improbable weapons, like farm tools
 * Someone in New Zealand was charged with assault with a weapon - to wit, a hedgehog. Seriously.
 * According to various legends, robbers have tried holdups armed with venomous snakes, Super Soakers, and in one case a booger on the end of his finger.
 * Also, frozen squirrels.
 * A snapping turtle was used by one robber.
 * A convenience store worker worker was faced with an attempted robbery by someone armed with a banana, according to an Uncle John's Bathroom Reader book. Naturally, things didn't work out well for the robber, who was arrested after failing to steal anything after hitting the clerk with his "weapon."
 * For the purposes of convicting a Serial Killer in Texas, bath water was ruled a deadly weapon.
 * The Russian Special Forces have combat techniques that use their trench shovels, because "they are as maniable as knives, but have more range and striking power".
 * If Erich Maria Remarque is to be believed, a shovel is a better weapon than a bayonet in the trenches. After all, several feet of solid wood with fairly sharp chunk of metal on one end? Reminds me of something, only better for trenches.
 * Plus you can dig with it!
 * Taken to extremes with a shovel designed to be used as a weapon first, a digging tool second.
 * When this troper served in the Finnish Army, they were specifically instructed to sharpen the edges of the trench shovel with whetstone.
 * The Soviets once used a spade doubling up as a mortar
 * Though not nearly as effective as his fictional counterparts, sleight-of-hand artist Ricky Jay holds the Guinness World Record for throwing a playing card the furthest, is capable of piercing the rind of a watermelon with a thrown card, and wrote a book titled, "Cards As Weapons".
 * There is a Guinness World Record for number of cucumbers cut with thrown playing cards: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j1GZd9_iSEA . Funnily, enough, this isn't the one I watched on TV - the one I watched was filmed in China. The guy manages 6 in 1 minute. The world record is 21.
 * Professional Wrestler Sid Vicious got his ass kicked by Brian Pillman, stormed out of a bar, and came back armed with a squeegee.
 * Russell Crowe's incident with a telephone probably counts for this.
 * In Arab countries, hitting someone with a shoe is an extreme form of insult, since the feet are considered to be very unclean. This became much more widely known during the second Iraqi War, in which a statue of Saddam Hussein was struck with shoes, and a protester even chucked two shoes at George W. Bush.
 * Hawaiian swords (a wooden paddle with shark teeth along the edges).
 * Aztec swords, Macuahuitl, were set with blade shards of obsidian, which can get surprisingly sharp. Cortez claimed that the blades could cut through a horse (tested on Mythbusters with mixed results). They also used slings with obsidian bullets that would shatter into sharp shrapnel.
 * A "kung fu" long-sleeved robe with lead weights sewn into the sleeves.
 * Also French police used to wear short capes with weights in the hem and would whorl them around in riots.
 * Fencers learned to use their capes as a parrying device in the absence of a dagger.
 * 'Duckfoot' pistols with 5 barrels on one trigger, for people who don't care who they hit. Intended for riot control situations, where you've got a lot of enemies.
 * A cutlass with a pistol in the handle (yes, a freaking gunblade).
 * A Soviet combat knife with a single-shot pistol built in the handle. There's also a Chinese version that fires four .22LR rounds.
 * A man was charged with assault for smearing peanut butter on a doorknob. The victim was allergic, but it still warrants a mention.
 * The yo-yo was invented as an Aboriginal hunting weapon. Originally it was just a smooth rock on a string.
 * In Sweden, a metal snuffbox is colloquially known as a "slagsmålsdosa" (fighting box). And yes, there are many recorded instances of people fighting with them, though they have lost popularity since The Sixties.
 * A shoplifter in a Memphis Wal-Mart escaped arrest by throwing her two-month-old nephew at a security guard.
 * The famous samurai Musashi is said to have defeated his rival Kojiro with an extremely long wooden sword he quickly fashioned from an oar.
 * Okinawan villages were regular targets of evil lords who twirled their mustaches while cackling. Some Japanese fishermen, in response, made an entire martial art half-based off of two-handed swordplay, half-based off of staff combat, all for...an oar. From paddling boats. And won. This obscure but deadly martial art is called "chikin sunakachi", or "ekudi".
 * Bartitsu and La Canne are two martial arts devoted to defending yourself with your walking stick. When so many gentlemen carry around a wooden club with a weighted metal head, it's only natural that they tend to get used in brawls.
 * Carlos Hathcock, a famed Marine Corps sniper (one of his famous achievements being a Scope Snipe), once used a .50 machinegun modified and mounted with a scope as an improvised sniper rifle. He set the record for the 20th century's longest combat kill; the distance was 2,286 meters. Also counts as an Improbable Use of a Weapon.
 * That record was only recently broken. The record breaker used a Tac Macmillan -- while it uses .50 cal, it's a bona-fide bolt-action sniper rifle.
 * There are actually forms for a Boat oar in Shaolin Kenpo.
 * Even paper gets made into a weapon.
 * The rolled-up magazine.
 * The Millwall brick.
 * During World War II spies were taught to make a dagger by repeatedly folding a newspaper into a small square and thrusting the point into the throat of an enemy.
 * Some prison inmates harden sheets of toilet paper using toothpaste, and file them into shivs.
 * Under most historical duelling codes, the challenged party was allowed to choose the weapon. Some people were known to ask for outlandish things like spoons or cannons to illustrate their disdain for the practice without the implied cowardice of declining the challenge. US President Abraham Lincoln was a notable example of this, once declaring human feces to be the weapon used in a duel. The challenge was withdrawn.
 * Large, metal framed flashlights as mentioned above are actually extremely common among security officers who aren't permitted to carry weapons on duty.
 * The meteor hammer is essentially a long rope with weighted knotted ends. In case this wasn't enough, skilled practioners light them on fire.
 * There is a company in the Philippines that makes combat umbrellas. They are strong enough to split a watermelon, or support a man's weight, and can still be used as an umbrella.
 * In areas like Vancouver with frequent rain, umbrella self-defence classes may be offered, and most citizens are able to do so even without training through sheer amount of use.
 * To wit the Island of Guernsey has seen the following weapons occur:
 * A bottle of Fanta Orange Soda (Contents only), which ended with an assault charge.
 * A pig (Thrown)
 * A copy of shogun assassin, box and all, fired from a modified crossbow.
 * A flaming rabbit carcass
 * A 3/4 length men's coat (As a flail, weighted down with pocket change)
 * A bottle of makeshift napalm, the neck stoppered with a broomhandle. (Used as a pole-mace)
 * A crate of Stella Artois beer bottles, thrown as a whole.
 * An angry terrier harnessed onto a broom handle.
 * Highly compressed snow in the shape of artillery shells, fired from a modified ballista.
 * During a reenactment-grade sword training lesson, a training stick was broken with a wooden waster, one person retrieved a foot long section of it and used it as a training dagger, successfully disarming and taking down his sparring opponant.
 * Taser Knuckles.
 * Filipino history:
 * Historically, hunters in the Philippines used a "stone yoyo"-- basically, a vine and a disc of rock. They'd sit in a tree, leave a bit of food at the bottom, wait for an animal and PONK!
 * The Battle of Mactan. The natives threw everything at Magellan's men-- including but not limited to shellfish, coconuts, durian fruit and their own shit.
 * It's worth noting that a ripe durian can be used as a mace. Some people in other parts of Southeast Asia have been arrested and fined for attacking people with this fruit-mace, and people going into durian farms have to wear construction helmets.
 * A Florida man was lately sentenced from throwing venomous jellyfish into crowd.
 * Look around the room your in. Sometime, somewhere, somehow, each and every one of those object has been to kill a person.