The Boondock Saints/Funny

"Smecker: "What the fuck are you doing?" : "I'm trying to cuddle." Smecker: "Cuddle? What a fag.""
 * Connor and Murphy bickering about the rope while crawling through an air vent.
 * Also "Is it dead?"
 * "I killed your cat, you druggie bitch!" "But why?" "I thought it'd bring closure to our relationship."
 * "SHUT your FAT ASS, Ravie! I can't go out to buy a pack of smokes without running into NINE GUYS YOU FUCKED!"
 * The whole scene with Smecker and

"Connor: "What the fuck're ya doin'?" Rocco: "I'll tip her!""
 * "Who ordered the whoopass fajitas!?"
 * "Would somebody please come over here and-" "FUCK!" "Me up the-" "ASS!"
 * The joke that Rocco tells in the first movie.
 * The entirety of the brothers' hit against the Chinese heroin dealers.
 * The scene in the strip club in the first film, especially Rocco's "tit thing."

"Priest: (still concerned for his life) Would they ever harm an innocent person for any reason? Smecker: No, they would never do that. Well--the two Irish guys wouldn't, the Italian guy, he might, he's kind of an idiot."
 * Connor and Murphy messing with "Jafar" on his first big job.
 * Shortly after Smecker has gone into a confessional (while drunk), Rocco has followed him in with intent to kill despite the McManus brothers' wishes. He holds the priest in the confessional at gunpoint. This is the last straw--Connor reaches through the other confessional and holds Rocco at gunpoint so that the priest doesn't get hurt. Meanwhile this exchange between Smecker and the priest occurs:

"Greenly: Hey, what if it was one guy with six guns?"
 * The deleted scene from the first movie where Connor and Murphy get a call from their mother.
 * The "upgrade" scene.
 * During the investigation of the firefight with Il Duce:

""And that gives me a HARD-ON!"  "But not in a gay way, or anything....""
 * From Rocco's pep talk in the second movie: