Stargate Atlantis/Recap/S03/E10 The Return, Part 1

"Beckett: My turtles! I just bought some wee baby turtles and no one knows to feed them.

Weir: Well, turtles are pretty hardy. I'm sure they'll be fine.

Sheppard: And they make good soup."

The Daedalus heads out to the literal middle of nowhere for the first test of the completed McKay-Carter Intergalactic Gate Bridge. Halfway through the tests, however, McKay gets distracted by strange proximity readings. It's an Aurora-class Ancient battle-cruiser travelling at just under the speed of light - and due to the magic of relativity, it is chock full of living, breathing Ancients, only a few years out of Atlantis.

The Ancients are overjoyed to find their city intact, and return immediately to Atlantis. The first thing they do, of course, is to throw out the Earth expedition. Everyone packs up and leaves - except Richard Woolsey of all people, who the Ancients keep on as a liason. O'Neill can stay too. Sheppard joins SG-4, McKay gets shipped off to Area 51, Beckett...does doctor-y things..., and Weir stares at the wall. And everyone is miserable, except possibly Beckett, who buys himself some turtles.

Out at dinner, trying to be a bit less miserable, they get a sudden call from General Landry. (Except for Beckett, who is singularly unloved in this episode). Atlantis is under attack from the Asurans. Not to worry, though, since it's written into their base codes that they can't harm the Ancients. Just take a jumper up and show them the new occupants and - KABOOM! Hmm...maybe they changed that after someone rewrote part of their base codes.

General Landry organizes an immediate rescue mission tells them all to go home (especially Beckett, who wasn't even invited), in order to obey General O'Neill's standing orders to nuke the city. Ever dutiful, the team decides to steal the jumper the SGC happens to have at the moment and head back to save the city on their own. Weir distracts Dr. Lee with her ignorance of World of Warcraft, and they escape via the McKay-Carter Intergalactic Space Bridge. Stopping briefly to rescue Ronon and Teyla from their new life of soup making, they head off to save Atlantis!

...to be continued.

Tropes
"McKay: I thought we promised never to mention that again. Beckett: I didn't."
 * A.I. Is a Crapshoot
 * Eat the Dog: Sheppard's solution to Beckett's turtle problem.
 * Ho Yay: Oh so very much. Particularly Carson's tearful farewell.
 * Let Us Never Speak of This Again: Beckett mentions at one point that his relationship with Lt. Cadman was strained by the fact that their first kiss was through McKay. And the Ho Yay goes through the roof.


 * Nice Job Breaking It, Hero: It's probably all McKay's fault. As usual.
 * Nuke'Em: Apparently these are General O'Neill's standing orders. Wow.
 * Redshirt Army: The Ancients certainly don't last long after retaking the city.
 * Stock Episode Titles: 61 uses
 * Turtle Power
 * Ungrateful Bastard: The Ancients
 * Lampshaded by Weir, that to them, its like coming home and finding someone else is sitting on their couch.