Cannibal! The Musical



"The sky is blue, and all the leaves are green My heart's as full as a baked potato I think you know exactly what I mean When I say it's a shpadoinkle day!"

'Cannibal! The Musical' (also known as Alferd Packer: The Musical) is a Black Comedy musical, aptly named and done by the boys behind South Park in their usual good taste. The story is all about legendary Colorado cannibal Alferd Packer, played by Trey Parker himself, backed by his crew of Humphrey, played by Stone, and other strange characters in his crew. Very strange Hilarity Ensues.

The movie was made on a shoestring budget and it shows-- Parker and Stone caved from pressure from friends to actually make a fake trailer they made for an assignment in college into a real movie. The film itself was made in 1993 but released as a film in 1996 by Troma. Early South Park humor is evident. A lot of it parodies the musical Oklahoma!.

The full movie can be watched for free online at the official site here, as well as the version with the DVD Commentary track. All the songs are downloadable for free as well.

"Swan: We can name him Tom or we can name him George!...We can name him Bob or we can name him Beowulf!"
 * Aerith and Bob: From "Let's Build a Snowman!":

"Noon: Oh stop! Humphrey: That's sick. Frenchy: I agree, [hits one of the other trappers] Nutter was singing in the wrong key! Nutter: No I wasn't. It was Loutzenheiser. I was singing in E♭ minor. Frenchy: The song's in F♯ major! Bell: I think they're the same thing. I mean, E♭ is the relative minor of F♯. Frenchy: No, it isn't. The relative minor is 3 half-tones down from the major, not up! Noon: No, it's 3 down. Like A is the relative minor of C major. Loutzenheiser: But isn't A♯ in C major? Bell: Wait, are you singing mixolydian scales, or something? Frenchy: A# is tonic to C major. It's the 6th! Humphrey: No it isn't! Swan: Well, it'd be like a raised 13th if anything."
 * All Girls Want Bad Boys: The gentle-natured protagonist's horse dumps him for the more macho, more aggressive trappers.
 * Angry Mob Song: Hang the Bastard, meant to sound as much as possible like a cheery old-school-style excuse-to-dance number.
 * Bilingual Bonus:
 * Some of the lines spoken by the Japanese Indians translate as "This movie sucks" and "You're a stupid person".
 * According to the (drunken) commentary, the hand signals Humphrey (Matt Stone) uses when first meeting the not-Indians is, supposedly, sign language for "Jesus Christ is Dead".
 * Black Comedy
 * Berserk Button: What Liane is to Packer
 * Bloody Hilarious
 * The Cameo: Of the unlikeliest sort: influential avant-garde filmmaker Stan Brakhage appears briefly as Noon's father. Brakhage was one of Parker and Stone's film professors in college.
 * Chekhov's Gunman: The Japanese Indian chief.
 * Comically Missing the Point: The trappers, when told to stop singing the "trapper song". However both sides end up missing the point when it degenerates into an argument over what key the song should be in.

"Ralph: [thrusts a pointing finger at the group] The Rocky Mountains. I gotta warn ya! You're doomed! Doomed! Doomed! [lowers the finger] You're doomed! [walks away] Doomed. [the man walks around the group. The miners follow his walk with their eyes] Turn back, while you still can. You're doomed. You're all doomed. Packer, Swan: [ Beat] Thank you."
 * Comedy of Remarriage: Subversion-via-aversion between Packer and Liane. (The story is so sappy/corny/cliche this is a no-brainer, until it falls completely flat, which is almost assuredly deliberate.)
 * Content Warnings: Parodied.
 * Placed after the end credits: "Due to the graphic nature of this film, it should not have been watched by small children."
 * The film opens with a disclaimer stating that "The film's violent scenes have been edited out for your viewing pleasure", then immediately follows up with a scene where Packer hunts his companions down in the woods, beats one of them with their own severed arm, rips the tongue off another one and proceeds to chow it down.
 * Creator Breakdown: The whole Liane subplot was inspired by Parker walking in on his fiance of the same name having sex with another man a month before their wedding. He apparently kept her in the dark about this subplot considering that she helped him choreograph the dancing.
 * Crowd Song: "Hang the Bastard"
 * Dark Reprise: Of "That's All I'm Asking For"
 * Defrosting Ice Queen: Polly Pry.
 * Doomy Dooms of Doom:

"Bell:	Could you tell me what tribe this is? Chief:	Hmmmmm... We are... Indians! Bell:	...Yes, I see that, but... what Indians? Chief:	You don't think we are... Indians? Bell:	No, no, no, I just um... Chief:	We have... teepees. Bell:	Right. I see, but... Chief:	Look at all these teepees ...we have. Because... we are...Indians! Packer: Yeah, they have teepees."
 * Double Entendre / Innocent Innuendo: "When I Was on Top of You", Packer's heartfelt and sincere ballad to his missing horse, is littered with these. Afterwards, Humphrey offers Packer a piece of fudge with the words "Fudge, Packer?"
 * Dream Ballet: Between Packer and Frenchy.
 * DVD Commentary: The directors got very drunk and watched their movie. Hilarity Ensues.
 * Eye Awaken: Parodied in a marvelously over-the-top fashion.
 * Eye Scream: The civil war veteran whose eye squirts out pus every time he talks.
 * Fauxreigner: Native Americans that are Japanese people in disguise...

"Humphrey: You guys! I just thought of something too. Packer: What? Humphrey: Okay, now, you remember when Swan was building that snowman? Well, how the hell did he make that tapping sound with his feet? Noon: You just now thought of that? Humphrey: Well it's pretty fucking weird, isn't it?!"
 * Fish Out of Water: All of the miners, when they run into the Outside Context Villain Cyclops, and try to play along, but fail for being Culture Blind. Also an inversion of Country Mouse, as it's the miners, and not the mouse, who are shown up as oddball.
 * Fridge Logic: In-Universe.

"Miller: (Looking at the food) You son of a bitch Humphrey. Humphrey: Aww, come on. Ya didn't even try it! (He tries it) Miller: You son of a bitch Humphrey."
 * Funny Afro: The big crazy red jewfro Humphrey hides under his hat.
 * Groin Attack: Packer pulls a mean one on Frenchy.
 * Historical Beauty Update: The plain Polly Pry is played by the pretty Toddy Walters (albeit in unflattering clothes)
 * "I Am" Song: "Trapper Song". Doubles as a Villain Song.
 * I'm a Humanitarian: Of course!
 * "I Want" Song: "That's All I'm Asking For"
 * Killed Mid-Sentence: is killed mid sentence, in the middle of a musical number.
 * Lethal Chef: Humphrey.

"Packer: How does it feel to be riding my horse? Frenchy: Come off it, Packer! Everyone in this town's ridden your horse!"
 * Life Imitates Art: At the end of the film Packer . In real life Trey Parker decided he didn't need his ex Liane after finding love with Toddy Walters the actress who plays Polly Pry.
 * Lovable Sex Maniac: Noon. His obsession with sex and women is based on the Dian Bachar, the actor who played him.
 * Made of Plasticine
 * Meaningful Name: Parker's acting credit is "Juan Schwartz", one of the pseudonyms the real-life Packer used while running from the law.
 * The Mel Brooks Number: "When I Was On Top Of You," specifically.
 * Nice Hat: Humphrey uses these exact words to mock the trappers' stylish dead skunk headwear.
 * No Party Like a Donner Party
 * Off with His Head: In the final scene.
 * Only Sane Man: Frank Miller
 * Overly Narrow Superlative: From the poster: "the first intelligent musical about cannibalism." A Take That at Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street, perhaps?
 * Perfectly Cromulent Word: "Shpadoinkle."
 * Place Worse Than Death: Wyoming.
 * Please Keep Your Hat On: Humphrey's huge afro reveal, later used for Kyle's hair in South Park.
 * The Pollyanna: Swan. Cheerful while starving and freezing and "fucked", he sings a cheerful snowman song to lighten the mood.
 * Rasputinian Death:
 * Really Gets Around: Liane

"Alferd Packer: Hey, do you guys think it's true, that she's a trapper horse? Frank Miller: A horse is a horse. James Humphrey: Of course. Alferd Packer: Of course."
 * Real Trailer, Fake Movie: This is how it began. Trey made a fake trailer for film class and was told to make the movie by his teacher.
 * So Bad It's Good: Invoked--terrible acting, sets that most middle school productions would be ashamed of, and all on purpose. It works.
 * Talent Double: Spoofed in Packer's dream sequence, where no attempt whatsoever is made to cover up the obvious ballet double.
 * That Reminds Me of a Song: Parodied. Swan's infamous "Snowman" song, which he sings at the worst times.
 * This Is Gonna Suck: Humphrey's exact words when they're about to cross the river.
 * Those Two Guys: Those two trappers who form Frenchy's posse.
 * Throw It In:
 * "Shpadoinkle" was at first just a silly placeholder word in the song, but Trey and Matt ended up liking it so much they kept it in.
 * The sheriff says "You Know What They Say about sunrise?" then pauses and walks off without making his point. The actor was apparently drunk and forgot his lines, but Trey Parker thought it was funnier than the actual line.
 * Villain Song: "The Trapper Song".
 * Waxing Lyrical:


 * What Is This Feeling?: Polly Pry in "This Side of Me".
 * You Know What They Say: "You know what they say about sunrise?" Tragically, we never do find out what they say.
 * Your Cheating Heart