Wanton Cruelty to the Common Comma/Quotes

"Those who prefer their English sloppy have only themselves to thank if the advertisement writer uses his mastery of the vocabulary and syntax to mislead their weak minds."

- Dorothy L Sayers

"I do believe in commas, I do, I do!"

- Remus Lupin in the Shoebox Fanfiction

"''Oh, if you want it to be possessive,

It's just I-T-S

But if it's supposed to be a contraction,

Then it's I-T-Apostrophe-S

...Scalawag!''"

- Strong Bad, Strong Bad Email #89: local news

"I call unnecessary use of ellipses, five yard penalty."

- Mike Nelson, Mystery Science Theater 3000

"As far as punctuation goes she appears to have no approach at all, but seems merely to throw it at a page from a distance, like playing darts."

- A Note from the Editors (Terry Pratchett and Stephen Briggs), Nanny Ogg's Cookbook

"Oh look, one of those fancy periods. I think I'll use that this time."

- Zero types a letter for Sarge in one Beetle Bailey strip.

""After all, with the world in its current lamentable state, I sincerely believe that rather than WASTING commas with the rest of my fat capitalist pig brothers on frivolous consumerist sentences like these, they should be donated to the more needy, such as the Chinese, who as I understand it have NO COMMAS AT ALL.""

- The Shoebox Project