The Abridging of Haruhi Suzumiya/Funny

"Haruhi: Ya-hoo-oo! Kyon: *thinking* What the hell was that?!"
 * A couple wonderful ones in episode 2.

"Haruhi: *walks in* *bleep** bleep** bleep** bleep** bleep** bleep** bleep** bleep** bleep** bleep** bleep** bleep*
 * And then later...

Kyon: So I'm guessing it didn't go out too well?"

"Itsuki: Anyway dude, let me sum it all up for you: I am one of many in a group of espers that believes Miss Suzumiya is God. We are under the impression that what she says and does affects how this world is built, and that just her being bored of this world can wipe out our very existence. Kyon: ...You're high, aren't you? Itsuki: What are you talking about, giant talking cupcake?"
 * Near the end of Episode 3: