Desperate Housewives/Characters

This is the character sheet for Desperate Housewives.

Susan Delfino (Teri Hatcher)
"Edie: "I have a husband now."
 * Bitch in Sheep's Clothing: Susan is just as bitchy as the other Housewives, yet she's the one who tends to get away with it because of how "cute" and "klutzy" she is.
 * Butt Monkey: Is incredibly unlucky, romantic issues, liver issues, being forced out of the lane, and friendship troubles in the last season and not being able to deal with things in the final season.
 * Deadpan Snarker: Occasionally.

Susan: "Really? Who's?""


 * The Ditz: To a ridiculous extent.
 * Hey It's That Guy: Teri Hatcher played Lois Lane.
 * Flanderization: From season two onward, contributing to her being the scrappy.
 * Four-Temperament Ensemble: Sanguine.
 * Hot Mom: To Julie and to MJ.
 * Informed Attractiveness: While Teri Hatcher is very pretty, the other housewives are equally or even more so; yet Susan has the most men fawning over how 'hot' she is.
 * The Klutz: Firmly cemented as this when one of her first actions in the series was accidentally burning down someone's house.
 * The Woobie: And how.
 * The Scrappy: Though she occasionally gets rescued from the scrappy heap.

Lynette Scavo (Felicity Huffman)

 * : An odd example that is both played straight and subverted in that
 * Deadpan Snarker
 * Flanderization: Season 5 and 7. So very much.
 * Four-Temperament Ensemble: Phlegmatic (without the laziness)
 * Gag Boobs: Her increased cup size due to her pregnancy in season 6 became a fodder for some jokes.
 * Law of Inverse Fertility
 * Mama Bear
 * Team Mom
 * Took a Level In Jerkass: Lynette has always been kinda controlling, but nearing the end of season seven,

Bree Van de Kamp (Marcia Cross)
"Bree: My track record with lovers... two dead, one in a wheelchair."
 * The Alcoholic: In season 2, plus the occasional relapse.
 * Badass: When it comes to guns. Also when she kicks her son Andrew's bedroom door in when she finds out he is at a strip club.
 * Butt Monkey: If something traumatic is going to happen to one of the leading females in the cast, it is inevitably going to be Bree.
 * Cartwright Curse: One surefire way to predict if a male character is going to die is judged by one question: Is he Bree's love interest? So far, the one--one--love interest she's had who didn't end up dead by the end of the affair is  who ends up in a wheelchair for life by the end of the relationship. In comparison to the others, he got off lucky.
 * Lampshaded in a season five promo, where the paper boy recaps the events of the past four seasons, and ends his recap of Bree with "I hope Orson doesn't die, too."
 * She even lampshades it herself during season 7:

"Rex Van De Kamp: Bree, I can't live in this detergent commercial anymore!"
 * Control Freak: And how.
 * Despair Event Horizon:
 * Driven to Suicide:
 * Fiery Redhead: When she wants to be.
 * The Fifties: Her look, moreso in the earlier series: A-line skirts and dresses, twin-sets with pearls, white gloves, her "flip" hair-do etc.
 * Four-Temperament Ensemble: Melancholic.
 * Freudian Excuse: Her mother died traumatically when she was 5 and her stepmother was a distant and unloving woman.
 * Hey It's That Guy: Marcia Cross' other best known role is Dr. Kimberly Shaw on Melrose Place.
 * Housewife: Obviously. She's the most classic example in the series and evokes the archetypal 1950's housewife.
 * Iron Woobie: More like adamant woobie. She lost 3 husbands and 2 boyfriends, her son hated her with passion for several seasons, her daughter doesn't like her much either, and she succumbed to alcoholism. She managed to get back on her feet each time, despite the odds, the people, and the universe working against her.
 * Lady Drunk:
 * Love Hurts: Despite the perfect facade, she is consistantly unlucky in love.


 * Neat Freak
 * The Perfectionist: Especially in the first season, when she couldn't even stand the sight of a loose button.
 * Pretty in Mink
 * Proper Lady: Deconstructed since the very first episode.
 * Really Gets Around:
 * Sexy Coat Flashing
 * Stepford Smiler: The other housewives have traces of this, but Bree is the ultimate Stepford Smiler of the show. Her own son calls her out on it in the pilot, saying she acts like she's running for Mayor of Stepford.
 * Sugar and Ice Personality
 * Super OCD: There were hints of this, especially in the early seasons, but it was never explored very much. She also referred to her quirks in terms of "anal retentiveness" and not "obsessive compulsiveness".
 * Team Mom

Gabrielle Solis (Eva Longoria)

 * Aesop Amnesia: How many times has she learned being a better person is more important than having material possessions or looking pretty?
 * Book Dumb: Especially when it comes to geography (she thinks Argentina is beside Romania.)
 * Deadpan Snarker
 * Four-Temperament Ensemble: Choleric.
 * Hollywood Homely: All the characters seem to notice a massive decline in Gabrielle's appearance over time, while the audience certainly doesn't. We're really supposed to believe someone as gorgeous as Eva Longoria looks bad in sweats?
 * Hot Mom: To Juanita, and Celia.
 * Jerk With a Heart of Gold
 * Mrs Vice Gal: Openly vain, materialistic and immature but a loyal friend and (eventually) loving wife and mother.
 * Rich Bitch: Her "bitch" status depends on the writer.
 * Spicy Latina: A subversion belive or not. Yes Gabby is sexy and she certainly has the temper but she lacks the sterotypical accent, can't speak Spanish and as several episodes have shown is indifferent at best towards her Hispanic heritage.
 * Spoiled Brat: When it comes to material possessions.
 * Volleying Insults: She and Carlos do this a lot, and were at their most tempestuous in the early seasons.

Mary Alice Young (Brenda Strong)

 * The Artifact: By the end of season 2, all of her story lines had been wrapped up pretty much, and there really was no particular point to her character anymore other than simply being the narrator (of mysteries unrelated to her).
 * Paul's return in season 7 subverted this.
 * Blackmail: Which sadly leads to...
 * Driven to Suicide: Which sets off the entire storyline of the seminal first season, and part of the second.
 * Mysterious Past
 * Narrator
 * Near-Death Clairvoyance
 * Posthumous Character
 * Villainy Discretion Shot: Apparently both the writers and the other characters have forgotten Mary Alice

Edie Britt (Nicollette Sheridan)
""Well, someone's gotta say it - Susan, what the hell have you been smoking?""
 * Deadpan Snarker


 * Grumpy Bear
 * Hot Mom
 * I Have Boobs - You Must Obey!: Knows how to use them to get her own way.
 * Jerk With a Heart of Gold
 * Ladette: She drinks beer, hates all that lovey dovey stuff and just wants some no-strings sex.
 * Love It or Hate It
 * Love Makes You Crazy: In season four Edie is unusually vicious about keeping Carlos in her hands,  is kind of a big leap for her.
 * Really Gets Around
 * Really Gets Around

Karen McCluskey (Kathryn Joosten)
"Karen: (to Lynette) No offense, but you should be sterilized."
 * Cool Old Lady: After all, she's portrayed by Kathryn Joosten.
 * Deadpan Snarker


 * Dead Son: The event that probably turned her into a bitter loner.
 * Hey, It's The Old Lady!
 * Loners Are Freaks: Subverted.

Katherine Mayfair (Dana Delany)

 * The Artifact: In season six, the writers didn't really know what to do with her after . So she ends up going through various hysterics that were almost completely irrelevant to the rest of the season's plot, before
 * Back for The Finale
 * Mysterious Past
 * Put On a Bus
 * Villainy Discretion Shot: Was gratuitously cruel to her dying aunt and treated her daughter poorly before her secret was revealed and she joined the core group.
 * Yandere: In season 6, towards Mike.
 * She's practically a poster child. She got increasingly insane in the first half of the season, but then regained sanity later.

Betty Applewhite (Alfre Woodard)

 * Dark Secret: She keeps her mentally challenged son Caleb in the basement since he's suspected of.
 * Put On a Bus
 * Token Minority

Angie Bolen aka Angela DeLuca (Drea De Matteo)

 * Badass: After all,
 * Italians Talk With Hands: She gesticulates more than the other housewives, though not on a caricatural level.
 * Mama Bear
 * Put On a Bus
 * Scars Are Forever: She has a wide scar on her back, and she's very careful not to show it.

Mike Delfino (James Denton)

 * Badass: Well, as close as anyone gets on this program.
 * Hot Dad
 * Mr. Fanservice
 * Nice Guy: Compared to the other husbands, at least.
 * Papa Wolf
 * Nice Guy: Compared to the other husbands, at least.
 * Papa Wolf

Tom Scavo (Doug Savant)

 * Butt Monkey
 * Fan Service: His thong scene.
 * Flanderization: Both he and his wife suffered this a lot in season five, going from a couple that had their problems but could still work through them together, to a "couple" that argued every other episode over the smallest most insignificant problems (well, insignificant compared to a tornado, a psychopathic child from a previous relationship, and cancer).
 * Henpecked Husband
 * Hollywood Homely: One episode of season six had Tom wanting to get plastic surgery to remove the large amount of wrinkles on his face. Coincidentally, that was the only episode that season where Tom's actor wore fake wrinkle makeup. Even though he chose against the surgery, he still looks ten years younger again the next episode.
 * Hot Dad
 * Papa Wolf

Carlos Solis (Ricardo Antonio Chavira)
"Gabrielle: Go on, go all cholo on his ass!"
 * The Atoner: In season 2.
 * Butt Monkey
 * Deadpan Snarker: What else would you expect by Gabrielle's husband?
 * Flowers for Algernon Syndrome:
 * Hot Dad
 * Overprotective Uncle: To Ana.
 * You Wouldn't Like Me When I'm Angry

Orson Hodge (Kyle MacLachlan)

 * Affably Evil: The "evil" part is subverted once it turns out that . However, in season 8 he's clearly this.
 * Butt Monkey: His mother made him think, he was institutionalized after falling into depression, he got his mistress   and managed to save his wife from a similar death at the last moment. Not to mention that his first ex-wife drugged and raped him. Once things seemed to be settled, he went into prison and lost his job as a dentist, his wife cheated on him and he ended up   in a plane crash.
 * The Chessmaster: In season 8.
 * Death Seeker: Briefly during season 6.
 * Gentleman Snarker
 * Henpecked Husband: During season 5.
 * Hey It's That Guy: Look, it's Agent Dale Cooper! No, wait, it's Jeffrey Beaumont!
 * Keeping Secrets Sucks
 * Mommy Issues
 * Neat Freak
 * Prison Rape: Referenced to, and (luckily) subverted.
 * Promoted to Opening Credits: From season 3 to 6.
 * Stepford Smiler: Second only to Bree.
 * Sympathetic Adulterer: When he was married to Alma.
 * What Happened to The Mouse?: We never know what happened to him after he

Rex Van de Kamp (Steven Culp)

 * Back for The Finale
 * Deadpan Snarker
 * Guest Host: After his death, he gets to narrate one episode, which focuses on the men in the series.
 * Murder the Hypotenuse: He's the victim in this case.

Paul Young (Mark Moses)

 * Creepy Monotone
 * Keeping Secrets Sucks
 * Mysterious Past
 * Papa Wolf

Karl Mayer (Richard Burgi)

 * Amoral Attorney
 * Back for The Finale
 * Handsome Lech
 * Jerkass
 * Jerk With a Heart of Gold: More in the first seasons.
 * Papa Wolf: He can definitely be protective of his daughter Julie.
 * Really Gets Around
 * Papa Wolf: He can definitely be protective of his daughter Julie.
 * Really Gets Around

Andrew Van De Kamp (Shawn Pyform)

 * Calling The Old Lady Out: Blames the majority of his problems on his mother.
 * Coming Out Story
 * Gayngst: Initially, though by the beginning of season 3 he seemed to become much more well adjusted.
 * "Well Done, Son" Guy: During season 6, when it seemed Bree was replacing Andrew with the son she always wanted.
 * What Happened to The Mouse?: During season 8, he comes back to his mother's house... And then nothing. He completly disappears from the radar, and isn't even present during the season finale. Please note that he should be living with his mother at this point, in her house, while she's . But he doesn't show up at all, not even for . It seems that the scenarists completly forgot his existence.

Danielle Van De Kamp (Joy Lauren)
"Bree: When I was young, my stepmother told me that I was very lucky. I possessed beauty, wit, cunning, and insight. These were weapons all women needed to survive in the world.
 * Brainless Beauty: As summed up by her own mother:

Danielle: So?

Bree: So take good care of your looks, Danielle. You don’t have any other weapons at your disposal."

"Danielle: Benjamin's already reading at a third grade level.
 * Also:

Bree: So what are you going to do next year when he overtakes you?"

""I don't care as long as I have my own bathroom...""
 * Bratty Teenage Daughter: And how.
 * Hot for Teacher: For two episodes in season three, done out of spite more than anything else.
 * Jerkass: Blackmailed Julie's boyfriend into continuing to sleep with her.
 * And if she hadn't, she wouldn't have gotten pregnant. (Assuming she wasn't already pregnant at the time, that is).
 * Popular Is Dumb
 * Spoiled Brat


 * Teen Pregnancy: Seasons three and four.

Julie Mayer (Andrea Bowen)

 * Little Miss Snarker
 * Odd Friendship: Inexplicably was friends with the vapid, skanky, selfish Danielle.
 * Only Sane Woman: On several occasions.

Zachary Young (Cody Kasch))

 * Calling the Old Man Out: Frequently comes to blows with his father, Paul.
 * Gag Penis: According to Carlos.
 * Hollywood Nerd
 * Mysterious Past
 * Stalker With a Crush: On Julie and, on a lesser note, on Gabrielle.

Adam Mayfair (Nathan Fillion)

 * Hey, it's Nathan Fillion!
 * Hot Stepdad
 * Nice Guy
 * Put On a Bus: At the end of season 4.
 * Reasonable Authority Figure: When confronted with his wife Katherine.

Ana Solis (Maiara Walsh)

 * Bratty Teenage Daughter: Well, bratty teenage niece, anyway.
 * Ms. Fanservice
 * Put On a Bus: At the end of season 6.
 * Shoo Out the New Guy

Martha Huber (Christine Estabrook)

 * Asshole Victim
 * Back for The Finale
 * Blackmail Is Such an Ugly Word: To Susan and.
 * Gossipy Hen
 * Nosy Neighbor: A classic example.

Felicia Tillman (Harriet Sansom Harris)

 * The Chessmaster
 * : At the ending of season 7, or at least so it seems.
 * Loners Are Freaks
 * The Woman Behind The Woman: Turns out she's Beth's.
 * Manipulative Bitch

Gloria Hodge (Dixie Carter)

 * Big Bad: Of season 3.
 * Bitch in Sheep's Clothing
 * The Chessmaster
 * Evil Cripple: A lesser example, since she has to walk with a cane after
 * The Fundamentalist: She  and attempted to   because she thought Orson was still married to Alma before God's eyes.
 * Holier Than Thou
 * Knight Templar
 * Manipulative Bitch
 * My Beloved Smother: The "beloved" part fades away very quickly.
 * Obnoxious In-Laws: Easily the pinnacle in the series. Unless you're Alma, of course.
 * Obnoxious In-Laws: Easily the pinnacle in the series. Unless you're Alma, of course.

Bob Hunter and Lee McDermott (Tuc Watkins and Kevin Rahm)

 * Faux Yay: Lee pretends to be straight in one episode in Gabrielle's scheme to catch her housemate in the act of soliciting sex.
 * Only Sane Man: There are exactly two men in this show that are sane and normal and without any drama in their lives. They are married to each other.
 * Pet Homosexual: Much to their frustration, the housewives always invite them over when they need some gay friends.
 * Straight Gay: Bob is a tad more masculine than Lee, but they both act like your average middle aged man.
 * True Art Is Incomprehensible: The first thing the two do when they move in is put in a giant gaudy metal piece of art in their yard, which is also a fountain.

Maisy Gibbons (Sharon Lawrence)

 * Alpha Bitch: Amongst the mothers at Barcliffe School.
 * Bitch in Sheep's Clothing
 * Break the Haughty
 * High Class Call Girl:
 * Rich Bitch

Robin Gallagher (Julie Benz)

 * Closet Key: For
 * Lipstick Lesbian
 * Stripper With A Heart Of Gold
 * Ms. Fanservice

Eddie Orlofsky (Jason Schwartzman)

 * Alcoholic Parent: His mother.
 * Berserk Button: Don't laugh at him. (Though oddly enough, he did try stand up comedy earlier in the season. Fortunately he Cannot Tell a Joke.) Also, don't be mean to Lynette in front of him.
 * Beware the Nice Ones
 * Delivery Guy: Bonus points for
 * I Just Want to Be Loved
 * Mommy Issues
 * Tragic Villain
 * I Just Want to Be Loved
 * Mommy Issues
 * Tragic Villain
 * Tragic Villain
 * Tragic Villain
 * Tragic Villain