Dog Sees God

Dog Sees God: Confessions of a Teenaged Blockhead is a 2004 play by Bert V. Royal. A Darker and Edgier take on the Peanuts universe, the show starts with the death of Snoopy and Woodstock, and somehow only manages to get more depressing from there. Due to copyright and trademark issues, none of the characters go by their official Peanuts-verse names.

The main characters are:
 * C.B.: Charlie Brown. Probably the most well-adjusted character (until the plot happens).
 * C.B.'s Sister: Sally
 * Van: Linus gone pothead. When C.B. and Van's sister burnt his security blanket, his response was to mix it with weed and smoke it.
 * Matt: Pig-Pen. In the years since Peanuts, he's turned into a germaphobe and a homophobe.
 * Beethoven: Schroeder
 * Marcy: Marcie
 * Tricia: Peppermint Patty
 * Van's Sister: Lucy


 * Abusive Parents
 * Adults Are Useless: Lampshaded, specifically the traditional muffled-trumpet Peanuts voices.
 * Affectionate Parody: Just about every single cliché from various earlier "Darker and Edgier" pariodies of the comic show up here in some form, from Snoopy getting rabies to Peppermint Patty and Marcie having a huge lesbian subtext going on, and everyone is generally foul-mouthed, drug-abusing and sex-obsessed—but despite all this, the comic's ideals and themes are upheld and honored (if stretched a little), and
 * Alternative Character Backstory:  gets one hell of a Freudian Excuse, making him seem very much The Woobie- at least in terms of his comic counterpart.
 * Berserk Button: NEVER call Matt 'Pigpen'
 * Black Comedy
 * Break the Cutie
 * Butt Monkey: C.B., obviously.
 * Bury Your Gays:
 * Catch Phrase: Most of those in Peanuts are lampshaded.
 * Comedic Sociopathy: Van's Sister is in an insane asylum.
 * Coming Out Story:
 * Cloudcuckoolander: C.B.'s sister. Three words: "Cocooning into Playtypus."
 * Van also fits the mold pretty well.
 * Crapsack World
 * Darker and Edgier
 * Driven to Suicide:
 * Erudite Stoner
 * Fingore: When Matt
 * Forceful Kiss
 * Also "Shut Up" Kiss
 * Fridge Brilliance: Pen pal,, since the play is set in the Peanuts universe,
 * Alternatively,
 * Full-Name Basis: Averted: even though C.B. is Charlie Brown, he is never called by his full name. Though his sister does refer to him as "Charles", and Van "Chuck B."
 * Only one production used his full name at any point in the production and they were sued because of it.
 * Hey, It's That Guy!: A 2005 reading at the Westside theatre featured William Miller, Kim Pine, Stephen Stills, Moritz Stiefel, Dawn Summers, and Rogue. The Off-Broadway premiere featured Faith Lehane, Ugly Betty, Boone Carlisle and Finch.
 * Ho Yay
 * Incompatible Orientation
 * Jerkass: Matt.
 * Karma Houdini:
 * Kill the Cutie:
 * Killed Off for Real:
 * Leaning on the Fourth Wall: "Do you ever feel like you're not a real person? That you're the product of someone's imagination and you can't think for yourself because you're really just like some creation and that somewhere there's people laughing every time you fall?"
 * Les Yay: Tricia and Marcy are accused of this at once point, and are horrified by it.
 * Mushroom Samba
 * Never My Fault
 * Ordinary High School Student: C.B.
 * Shout-Out: To Peanuts, obviously.
 * Sliding Scale of Idealism vs. Cynicism: Peanuts was never the most idealistic comic strip, but this slides it waaaaay over to the cynical end of the scale.
 * Invisible to Gaydar
 * Their First Time
 * Why Did It Have to Be Snakes?: Matt's compulsive cleanliness.
 * Writing Around Trademarks
 * X Meets Y: It's Peanuts meets Spring Awakening.
 * Yandere: is implied to be a closet one for