Doom (Comic Book)



A comic adapted from the Video Game Doom.

The hero, a berserker packin' man-and-a-half with a 12.0 on a 10.0 scale of badness, is attempting to RIP AND TEAR a huge cyberdemon's huge guts with his Night Train, when his berserker pack runs out, leaving the demon bonking unharmed. His Unstoppable Rage over, he spends the rest of the comic communicating his desire to have guns (with a chainsaw) looking for a gun big enough to blow the demon away. But even if he personally stops this alien invasion, what kind of planet will we be leaving to our children? And our children's children? How will they live with all the undisposed toxic waste that we left to them to deal with and... oh, the humanity, my big gun is out of bullets! (Better believe it, soldier!) Dynamite!

You can read it here or with appropriate voiceover here. Linkara reviewed it in his best attempt at the Ultimate Warrior voice here.

""Cyberdemon? Big deal. He's slim pickings.""
 * Ascended Meme: As of the Xbox Live Arcade release of Doom II, most of the achievements are named after several lines from this very comic, such as "Important Looking Door" being obtained by finding a secret, and "You Have Huge Guts" for killing a Cyberdemon with your fists.
 * Adaptation Distillation
 * Ax Crazy: "I've got a handful of vertebrae and a headful of mad! Yeah, that's your spinal cord, baby! Dig it!"
 * Badass: Ok, the Doom Guy seems completely insane in here, but he still kills a lot of stuff!
 * The Berserker: Doom Guy starts the comic under the effects of a Berserk Pack. When it wears off, he becomes a little more coherent.
 * BFG: "Mine eyes can but weep as they bear witness to the majesty... The BFG 9000!"
 * Buffy-Speak: "Sweet Christmas! Big-mouthed floating thingies!"
 * "It's always something!"
 * Captain Obvious: "You are huge! That means you have huge guts!" How almost Rabelaisian...
 * "Now I'm radioactive! That can't be good!"
 * "Now I'm in a completely different place!"
 * Chainsaw Good: "Aaaah! Chainsaw! The great communicator!"
 * Cloudcuckoolander: The Doom Guy.
 * Companion Cube: "At this particular moment in time, I don't think I have a healthier or more deeply-felt respect for any other object in the universe than this here Shotgun." ...Then again, he's probably gone completely insane, so Cargo Ship, perhaps?
 * "Hey, Chaingun! The hell with respect!"
 * The aforementioned Cargo Ship is actually lampshaded and ridiculed at about 3:15 and 6:20 in this entry to a YouTube-based dramatic reading contest for the comic (for men and women, I must let you know).
 * The Dark Age of Comic Books: In many ways, this is really a parody of the kind of overly violent, overly angsty comics that were in vogue during the 1990s...
 * Did You Just Punch Out Cthulhu?: Subverted, more like "did you just try to punch out Cthulhu?"

""As I stride knee deep through the dead. All is clear. I know what must be done...""
 * Exploding Barrels: Wouldn't be Doom without 'em! He detonates a room full of them to try and get rid of an invisible Pinkie, but fails and is bodyslammed into the pit of radiation below.
 * Foe-Tossing Charge: At the story's climax, with a horde of monsters between the hero and the BFG.
 * Green Aesop Randomly Thrown-In Speech
 * Although he does raise a good point. Why the hell is there a giant vat of radioactive sludge lying out in the open?
 * Gorn: Lots of it.
 * Gun Porn: Sort of. After claiming "Guns are for wusses!" and promptly needing one, "Doomguy" effectively fetishizes the guns he finds; so much that at one point, much in the manner of a classical pick-up artist, he claims he's "All about that plasma rifle" (and baby, it's all about him!)
 * Heroic Mime: Considering the actual games, a subversion of epic proportions.
 * Heroic Comedic Sociopath: Let's see. He's got a "positive goal" (killing demons), he performs over-the-top grizzly deeds (killing demons), he loves what he's doing (killing demons), and it's all Played for Laughs (killing de- I mean, 'yes, most probably'). The Doom Marine in this story most likely qualifies.
 * I Love Nuclear Power: Not really, in this case: "Now I'm radioactive. That can't be good."
 * Lame Comeback: "Stupid, stupid Imp! You're stupid! And you're gonna be stupid and dead!"
 * Large Ham: The main character. "Yeah, that's your spinal cord, baby! DIG IT!"
 * "DYNAMITE!"
 * The Legions of Hell
 * Made of Plasticine: Pretty much everything except Doomguy and that Cyberdemon.
 * Muzzle Flashlight: "Might makes light! * blamm*  And I feel mighty!"
 * No Fourth Wall / Ax Crazy: The berserker packin' 'MAN AND A HALF is generally conversant with the non-spoken internal monologue boxes. Either he's crazy, or there's no fourth wall. Or both.
 * No OSHA Compliance: Lampshaded.
 * No Sell: The Marine's berserker pack runs out just as he punches the Cyberdemon. Said Cyberdemon merely grins at the now suddenly-not-Axe Crazy Marine.
 * Oh, the Humanity!: "The humanity! My big gun is out of bullets!"
 * Open Says Me: "Knock knock, who's there? ME!"
 * Plot What Plot: Well, the game had an Excuse Plot, after all...
 * Punch Punch Punch Uh Oh
 * Rated M for Manly: "RIP AND TEAR"
 * Rouge Angles of Satin: "heavy ordinance"
 * Shout Out: "Sweet Christmas!"
 * Sorting Algorithm of Weapon Effectiveness: Pretty much the plot - Doomguy kills stuff, and gets a weapon better then his last one.
 * Lampshaded when he soliloquizes about his vast respect for his shotgun, then instantly discards it in the next panel to pick up a chaingun.
 * Stealth Parody: It's kind of subtle, but...
 * Talkative Loon
 * Tears of Joy: Doomguy's reaction to acquiring the BFG 9000
 * Testosterone Poisoning: "WHO'S A MAN AND A HALF? I'M A MAN AND A HALF!"
 * "BERSERKER PACKIN' MAN AND A HALF!"
 * Title Drop: The subtitle anyway:

""Rip and tear, RIP AND TEAR, RIP AND TEAR! RIP AND TEAR YOUR GUTS! YOU ARE HUGE! THAT MEANS YOU HAVE HUGE GUTS!!! RIP AND TEAR!" "
 * Unsound Effect: *Bonk*
 * Unstoppable Rage: "Doomguy" while he has the berserker pack, in particular:

"Some time in 1996 a couple of guys got together and smoked what was apparently a large amount of crack and then injected pure heroin into their eyes and then proceeded to create what is now known only as 'the Doom comic'."
 * Up to Eleven: "I`m the man! I`m a bad man! How bad? Real bad! I`m a 12.0 on the 10.0 scale of badness!"
 * Warrior Monk: Sort of. After finding the BFG 9000, the "Doomguy"s normal tough-guy rhetoric is suddenly replaced by expressions one expects to hear from a classical warrior priest (although, to be fair, he does end it with his classical, every-word-a-catchphrase style).
 * What Do You Mean It Wasn't Made On Drugs?: Note that no-one has denied it was made on drugs.
 * Doomworld (presumed joking) describes its creation: