Two Garnets and Some Cherries with Cream

""Son, it's about time I tell you how I met your mother." "What...? It's 2 AM!""

- Summary

A Fanfic by Kayi Rowling. The beginning, "Chapter 1 of ?", may be read at Fanfiction.net and at the Bulbagarden Forums; from there, navigation towards newer chapters is easy.

The summary of the story, copy-pasted everywhere you look, is: ''“Son, it’s about time I tell you how I met your mother.” “What…? It’s 2 AM!” A SilverspawnShipping dish with a moderate amount of LOL sauce''.

A more detailed summary may actually care enough to tell you that this is a fanfic set in the Pokémon Special verse, featuring Silver and Giovanni as the latter tells the former about the time he met his one-true-love, the HGSS Rocket Executive Ariana. Hilarity Ensues via the unexpected jokes that slip past your defenses every now and then. The short dialogue in the summary naturally never happens (it is 2 AM when it starts, though)

...needless to say, this is purely Fanon, and it may be Jossed in its entirety at any moment by the manga's own HeartGold and SoulSilver chapter.

"Narrator (Silver's side): "Talk about an ego booster.""
 * Amoral Attorney: Archer.
 * Basement Dweller: Petrel.
 * Beta Couple:
 * Boom Town: Viridian City some time after the opening of the gym.
 * Chekhov's Armoury
 * Child Prodigy: Giovanni was a gym leader at the age of nine, and before him there was no gym at Viridian City.

"Silver: "And you still decided it was for the best to use it back then?" Giovanni: "I was young and believed myself to be immortal, son; it's obvious that I did.""
 * City Narrows: Viridian City's were explored swiftly by Giovanni and Ariana in "Chapter 4 of ?". At night.
 * Dangerous Forbidden Technique: Sird forbids Giovanni to use his Viridian Forest powers because they hurt him, but he always thinks he can fool her and uses them anyways.
 * "Chapter 4 of ?" discusses this:

": "I think you're after my mistress, sir.""
 * Defensive Feint Trap: Ariana basically starts her battle with Sird by spamming Synthesis to heal her Oddish as it keeps being hurt, even doing Sunny Day to make it more effective. She also attempted to order a Tackle against Starmie.  In the end, her Pokemon lost solely because of bad timing.
 * Designated Girl Fight
 * Dishing Out Dirt: The specialty of Viridian City's Gym are Ground Pokemon.
 * Damsel in Distress: Ariana, more often than not. Giovanni calls her out on it in "Chapter 3 of ?".
 * Doting Parent: Giovanni to Silver.
 * Even Bad Men Love Their Mamas: Proton, who allows his mother to stick around while he trains. The rest of the team loves her too.
 * Family Business: Giovanni started Team Rocket, Ariana joined,
 * Fiery Redhead/Evil Redhead: Ariana and all her side of the family. Silver is another trope, though.
 * Flash Back and Framing Device: Silver's side of the narration encases Giovanni's flashbacks, which are the main story.
 * Four Eyes, Zero Soul: Archer.
 * Heretic: Ariana, according to her father. Their family worships Arceus and is against Pokemon training, by the way.
 * As of Pokémon Black and White,
 * Huge Guy, Tiny Girl: See Beta Couple.
 * : "Chapter 4 of ?".
 * Jossed: In "Chapter 1 of ?", hideouts are vaguely implied to be as small as they seem to be in the Ruby and Sapphire games. Not only is this inconsistent with Pokémon Special canon, but
 * Thanks to Pokémon Black and White, the second paragraph of "Chapter 1 of ?", where the Pokedex holders' latest adventure is detailed, can't be talking about Isshu.
 * If You Know What I Mean: Yes, Proton, we know what you mean.
 * Lancers/Dragons: Whether or not you consider Giovanni to be in an heroic role, Sird and Archer occupy this role at the same time.
 * Long Title: Usually shortened to "Garnets and Cherries".
 * Lovable Sex Maniac: Proton.
 * Love At First Sight
 * Mafia Princess: Giovanni's mother.
 * Missing Mom: Ariana, who's closer to Silver than what he thinks she is; her own mother isn't mentioned either. And Giovanni's mother is dead during the flashbacks,
 * Morality Pet: Admit it, Sird's relationship with her Starmie (and possibly her Meowth too) is special.
 * My Sensors Indicate You Want to Tap That: Damn it, Beedrill!
 * "Chapter 4 of ?":
 * "Chapter 4 of ?":

"Silver: "I'm beginning to think you are saying that on purpose.""
 * Nakama: Everyone at Viridian City's gym for Giovanni. The relationships among them vary, though.
 * Nay Theist: Considering there's a cult (or religion) worshiping Arceus, it's safe to say anyone that isn't with them fits this trope.
 * Nicknamer: Proton.
 * Obfuscating Stupidity: Ariana, as part of her battle strategy. Shame Sird prefers more direct approaches, and beats her up for it.
 * Oblivious to Love:
 * Once an Episode: The narration on Silver's side will remind you that he's tired (word always in italics), and his thoughts will eventually get to Blue and Gold.
 * Ariana is also the one uttering the last line of every chapter.
 * Parental Substitute: Sird for Giovanni. Silver's not pleased to hear about it.
 * Pre-Ass-Kicking One-Liner: With lots of commas, and didn't mean anything by the end of the battle in "Chapter 2 of ?".
 * Psychic Powers: The manifestation of the powers of a Viridian Forest child usually have a couple of this, mainly Telepathy,.
 * Purple Prose: The fic's title came out from Giovanni's description of Ariana, after being interrupted by Silver's complaint (see Running Gag and Shout-Out below). The paragraph itself was a parody.
 * Red Eyes, Take Warning: Ariana, her sister Mars, and their father. Arguably, the two girls aren't evil or dangerous,
 * Redhead in Green: "Chapter 4 of ?" reveals that Ariana has been wearing green all along.
 * Running Gag: Silver is tired not tired.
 * Giovanni's side of the narration remarks that Ariana isn't beautiful twice before Silver finally breaks it in "Chapter 3 of ?":


 * On Giovanni's side, the word "politeness" (and related terms, such as "polite") is always between quotes when he refers to bystanders not caring enough.
 * Schedule Slip

"Giovanni: "As you wish.""
 * Shipper on Deck: Parodied in "Chapter 4 of ?" by.
 * Shout-Out
 * Scene changes will undoubtedly remind you of The Princess Bride.


 * Apparently,  if one goes along Silver's complaint over Giovanni specifying Ariana is not beautiful.
 * Smurfette Principle: The Viridian Gym trainers, unlike Team Rocket, don't respect the 1-girl-per-4-guys rule.
 * Soap Opera Disease: Giovanni's.
 * Stalker with a Crush:.
 * : Ariana joining the gym at the end of "Chapter 4 of ?"
 * Tender Tears/Tears of Remorse: Someone wasn't expecting to lose when challenging the Viridian Gym. Continues crying after.
 * Terms of Endangerment: Sird has a lot of these in store for Ariana. She has a preference for "hon(ey)" and "Skitty".
 * Unreliable Narrator: Giovanni abstains from using Ariana's name when telling Silver his story,
 * Vague Age: Silver is "nearly twen--!" years old.
 * During the flashbacks, Giovanni is around Silver's age (he's a "twenty-something year old")
 * Averted with Ariana: she's nineteen. However, her father was able to initially convince Giovanni she was fifteen...
 * White-Haired Pretty Girl: Sird.
 * Word Salad Title: Not justified, but you'll notice the fragmented Title Drop when it happens.
 * Yakuza: Giovanni's side of the family.