Paper Mario (franchise)/Funny

Welcome to the Funny Moments page for Paper Mar- Hey! Who pasted this ugly thing in?

Here's also the Funny Moments page for Super Mario Bros.

All Games
 * Any time the fourth wall is brought into play.
 * Mario Falling asleep from the extremely long "short versions" of the stories.

Paper Mario ""You know what I just realized? I hate the desert! Yup! Sand gets in my eyes so I can't see. I feel like I've eaten a couple pounds of sand, and my feet itch. I'm freaking out here!"
 * Reading Bowser's diary, and revealing that his hopes that Peach legitimately likes him.
 * "And...oh dear! Who put that thing in the story?"
 * At one point in Crystal Palace, a bunch of Duplighosts try to mimic Kooper. It was hilarious.
 * "BLEECH! WHERE DID YOU LEARN HOW TO COOK!? TRUCK DRIVING SCHOOL!?!"
 * The result of feeding Gourmet Guy a bad cake. As in, a "cake" made entirely of salt and uncooked eggs, or burned strawberries, or my favorite, just detergent.
 * It's enough to make one suspect that they allowed the selection and usage of non-recipe specified "ingredients" just for players to get a quick laugh out of results like this. And it's all the more hilarious.
 * Kammy when she sees Peach disguised as a clubba: "Mmm!! You there! You're doing a fine job."
 * Feeding the Gourmet Guy cake for the first time.
 * Goombario does not enjoy Dry Dry Desert.

"Ah, yes! Some more sand and some more cacti! How do you stand such a boring landscape? Look, when I signed on for this adventure, I was under the impression that there would be no boredom involved."

"You know, there sure are a lot of rocks in the desert. Before I came here, I thought there was just sand. But there are rocks, too. Whoopee."

"So hot... I feel dizzy... Where are we going again? Who are you, anyway?"

"So blue...the desert sky... They ought to call it... 'Big Ol' Super Blue Sky'!""


 * After you thrash the Goomba King and his servants, Red Goomba and Blue Goomba, they retreat to inside his fort. Listening at the window, you hear how the Goomba Bros. hid an important switch where no one will find it...outside.

The Thousand-Year Door "Flurrie: I should like to request that we never do that again."
 * Luigi's partners telling what really happened, as Luigi fudges his stories to make him sound not so pathetic. That poor Blooper.
 * Poor Blooper? What about the Bob-omb who had to see Luigi in drag?
 * There's a scene in Paper Mario the Thousand Year Door where Mario has to go through pipes to escape a locked room. Par for the course? Of course, for Mario. But the catch? Said pipes are in a toilet. No matter which of Mario's partners you have with you on the other side, their reaction is priceless--but Flurrie's is this troper's favorite:

"Koops: X-Nauts? Sounds like tissues... to the extreme or something."
 * IIRC, Koops says something along the lines of "so THAT'S what plumbers do!" Also:

"Goombella: Ms. Mowz was here before, but I think she took the next train to Floozyville."
 * Similarly, each time you run into Ms. Mowz, she gives Mario a kiss before leaving. Each partner's reaction is worth hearing.

"Goombella: Professor, he's Mario! You know, the famous one!
 * "You rang, dude? I mean, sir? You rang, Sir Grodus, dude? Grodus? Sir Grodus, sir?"
 * "Shut up."
 * Also this exchange at the beginning of the game:

Prof. Frankly: Oh, I'm sorry. I'm such a bookworm, I haven't a clue about what's "hip" right now."

"Yoshi: Oh man, the old monster-beyond-the-town-gate thing? Isn't that kinda cliched?"
 * And:


 * Made even funnier considering he only hatched in the last chapter.
 * I'm surprised that no one has mentioned the Bowser interlude where Bowser meets Lord Crump in Twilight Town.
 * Any of the Bowser interludes, especially the ones where you need to control him through mock versions of Super Mario Bros. levels.

"Rawk Hawk: Pain."
 * "Great, just great. Now I look like the huge, mighty king of GUYS WHO TALK TO POSTERS!"
 * Bowser's epic battle against Rawk Hawk for his Crystal Star:

""I'm not funny, sir!"
 * "I DON'T KNOW ANYBODY NAMED GONZALES!!!"
 * "STOP SPEAKING IN RIDDLES, YOU CHICKEN NUGGET!"
 * And, of course, Bowser's reaction to the news that he has been beaten to yet another Crystal Star... by Luigi.
 * "Swimming. I was swimming."
 * In the first interlude, Bowser can listen to two Hammer Bros. in a conversation. The first one starts blabbing about how he caught Bowser mooning over a picture of Princess Peach, all while the other one is telling him to shut it. His reaction when he turns around is pretty damn hilarious.

"He's not funny, sir!""

""Pfft.... what do I look like? His baby-sitter?"
 * When Kammy Koopa tells Bowser that Mario is in Rogueport, she expects a huge reaction obviously for her scouting and hard work. She gets:

"Phone: Weather in Glitzville is sunny, with a chance of more sun. It's above the clouds, stupid."
 * At the Great Tree, Kammy and Puni Elder get into an argument. Bowser has one of two thoughts that the player can choose; "You're BOTH too old!" or "It's hag vs hag! Awesome!" Regardless, Kammy will ask Bowser why it looks like he's dying to say something.
 * When visiting Glitzville, try answering the pay phone. You might get a weather update.

"(After receiving the threatening e-mail in Chapter 3) "Mario then proceeds to go on a rampage and whack everyone in the locker room with a steel folding chair...no, not really."
 * How about when a guy calls and says "Hello?" repeatedly?
 * The Nintendo Power guide for the game is actually pretty funny in parts.
 * If you don't have the guide, get it. It's like it was written by a Deadpan Snarker or a First Third Person Smartass.
 * Two moments in said guide that particularly stood out for this troper:

(When the Russian-accented Bob-ombs reveal their giant cannon to fire Mario to the moon) "Those of you who grew up in the '60's, feel free to hide under a table.""

"Yoshi: Ah ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! How'd that floor taste?"
 * Anytime you fight (and win) in the Glitz Pit with Yoshi.

"Pa-Patch: Hey, you want to know what smells really suspicious? Flavio's armpit! Smells like low tide!
 * Doopliss impersonating Mario.
 * For people who looked it up or replayed the game, when you try to guess Doopliss's name but use an uppercase "P" instead (since the lowercase "p" is missing) You'll get "Doo Pliss? Hahahaha! Who'd name their kid that?"
 * After his defeat, he ends up joining the Shadow Sirens, and becomes the replacement Butt Monkey of the group. By their final battle, the guy who forced you to take a long back-and-forth journey just to learn his name is begging to be called Doopliss, rather than "freak-in-a-sheet".
 * The funniest part would probably be Doopliss freaking out when you guess his name correctly.
 * "Flavio hates you all."
 * The complete lack of respect the entire crew have for Flavio.

Flavio: That's enough, you mutinous jokers!"

"Wow... what a profile! Although... this thing could use a good dusting... Huh? It looks like this eye is a little loose... Incredible! The statue's eye is a jewel! I got the Bowser Jewel! ...Just kidding."
 * The Cursed Chests, to the point during the third time around, Mario seems more annoyed than scared.
 * And eager to be Cursed With Awesome.
 * The fourth chest is actually disappointed when it learns Mario has already been through the entire "WEE HEE! FOOLS!" routine three times before.
 * Goombella's tattles do not disappoint:
 * Upon entry to an X-Naut base on the moon, she marvels at the architecture, especially the large dome that keeps all of the air within the structure. And then realizes that you just walked around outside with no problems.
 * Tattle with her when atop the Excess Express, and she'll try to describe the view briefly before giving up, on account of the Smorg infestation.
 * Her book describes Goombas as "the underlings of underlings". She reacts appropriately.
 * Tattle on Bowser and she'll say "That's Bowser, genius."
 * "That's a Twilighter who's totally obsessed with how important the moon is here. I guess, it's pretty prominent here, but he still might be a werewolf."
 * This moment is also Hilarious in Hindsight, as it makes an unintentional reference to The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess— even though Twilight Princess came out two years after Paper Mario: TTYD.
 * "I know she didn't turn into a pig just to feed her hungry kids!"
 * "Hey, this Twilighter is still a pig. .....Omigosh Mario, you can't tell her I said that!"
 * She is completely unable to tell the Punies apart, other than the main four. This results in some hilariously uninformative tattles if you ask her about them.
 * "Hm... I wonder how long Punies live. Smaller animals tend not to live as long as larger animals... ....maybe it's best not to think about it."
 * "You know what I wonder? Why are they called Punies? Because they're... Oh... right."
 * Tattle a Swooper for her opinion of its name.
 * Also, her tendency to point out the Fridge Logic behind some of the enemies, notably Bob-ombs and Hammer Bros.
 * When she first meets Dupree, she blows off his advances immediately. Unfortunately, he's a Recurring Extra, and her comments develop from simple disgust to outright despair if she keeps tattling him. And eventually all the way around to begrudging respect for how good he is at getting to each place in your journey before you.
 * "That's that totally gross guy, Dupree! What the heck is THAT guy doing here? Omigosh! You don't think he followed us here 'cause he's infatuated with me, do you? ...No? Oh, what, like it's not even possible?!? That's kinda insulting, Mario!"
 * "...it makes me want to yell, 'Hey stupid ocean! Look at me, I'm on vacation!!'"
 * The Tattle Log itself has a few amusing lines. On Kammy: "She's a nasty, magic-using crone, but you should still respect your elders! Remember that!"
 * "You wanna hate me, but you can't help but love the RAAAAAAAWWWWK!" Did Rawk Hawk write his own entry?
 * The crows in Twilight Town, when you hide in the shadows with Vivian.
 * Bowser can investigate his statues in his first level (which consists solely of walking to the other end of the room and being rude to a few underlings)... for the most part, he just comments about how handsome he is. But on the third one you get this lovely parody of the way Mario finds things, complete with Item Found music on the bolded statement:

"Goomba: I asked for a cute goomba gal, he's just some crusty old Bob-omb! Dude, what is WRONG with you?!"
 * One of the very first scenes in the game involves a massive horde of X-Nauts jumping Mario--and then Mario just walks away, as they're mindlessly pouncing on something (that is very much not Mario) in the middle of the crowd.
 * The scene shortly after the above where, in the middle of Toadsworth talking, 2 Pianta mobsters show up in the background and begin working two Craws (Gus and Garf) over before leaving. You're in Rogueport for 5 minutes and you've already witnessed a gang war.
 * During the final Bowser level, you can talk to that rich toad lady. Unlike the others, who cower in fear from Bowser, she begins admiring his horns before asking if she can mount them above her fireplace. Bowser's reaction is priceless.
 * Also, telling Bub that you're Koopa Koot, and to tremble before your constant favor-asking.
 * Or "I am Bowser, businessman of legend! Fear my accounting!"
 * When you try to wake General White, the game snarks at you how that's not working. Each and every time. You do it about a dozen times. Twice. And each is funnier than the last. Stuff like "Sleeping like a 'stached baby." or "He woke up... just kidding, he's still asleep."
 * There's one point where the professor is giving his usual exposition, he stops saying 'no that's not' you current partner asks 'that's not what?' and Professor Frankley screams 'I DON'T KNOW' cue face fault from Mario and your partner looking like they have just received some damage.
 * The sidequest from the trouble center where you have to give a Goomba (who somehow got deep into Pirate's Grotto) a girlfriend. You're supposed to introduce him to Goombella, but you can introduce him to any of your partners. The funniest part is, Koops and Yoshi seem to be legitimately offended that he didn't want them. Also, Ms. Mowz will simply tell him that he shouldn't go into any dark alleys after that.
 * His reaction if you show Bobbery is hilarious too.


 * In Chapter 2, when you first get to the Great Boggly Tree, you find there's a mechanical door that blocks your way. Punio goes to where the secret entrance for Punies is, but can't find it because of an invisible thingy. He comments no secret entrance would be labelled secret entrance. When you get Flurrie and use her power to blow that thingy away, it turns out, the secret entrance is marked by a large neon sign that clearly says "SECRET ENTRANCE".
 * Punio, of course, doesn't realize the irony.
 * After Chapter 7, there's a sidequest in the Trouble Center where you have to dress up like Luigi and meet someone who is a fan of Luigi. Hilarity ensues.
 * During any battle, the audience may throw items at Mario's party to help out, but sometimes you will get a heckler that will throw rocks or garbage at you. You can actually counter the hecklers by making Mario or his ally run off the stage, go into the audience, and whack the heckler so they leave! Mario may be saving the world, but he won't hesitate to kick someone's ass for busting his chops during a fight.
 * "You never know when someone might go nuts and attack! Be careful! Live longer!"
 * "Nobody zings us like that! NOBODY!!"

Super Paper Mario "Dimentio: Hm...and here I thought Mimi's ideal world was a gem-filled pool with hunky lifeguards...
 * The dating sim parody between Peach and Francis the nerdy chameleon, which he uses to ask Peach to marry him. The possible responses range from accepting to considering; one is "How much money do you make?" Peach snaps at the player no matter which choice is picked.
 * And at one point Francis hovers the cursor over "Smooch" for a few seconds, then quickly picks something else.
 * "I love going on message boards and complaining about games I've never played!"
 * Don't forget "They're NOT DOLLS. They're ACTION FIGURES. WITH REAL FIRE-PUNCHING ACTION."
 * Many of Dimentio's lines, mainly because of how absurd they are.
 * "Now we must duel! Like two gleaming banjos on a moonlit stoop!"
 * "And so I strike! Like an unseen dodgeball in an echoing gymnasium!"
 * "Ah! Once again we meet, like two angry, burly dinosaurs with terrible indigestion!"
 * "Now you and this robotic guardian can spend some quality time... Yes, quality snack time! When he snacks... on you! For you... ARE the snack!"
 * And, of course, his first shown interaction with Mimi...

Mimi: (transforms into Bowser) WHAT! Dimentio! Have you been reading my diary? ...uh...I mean..."

"Merlee (or maybe Mimi): Oh, please, you make me gag.
 * Fracktail, both before and after Dimentio fried his harddrive, had some funny lines. He even screams, "I AM ERROR!" at one point. Though, his system error meltdown and some of the emergency protocols his harddrive forces on him really say some stuff about his creators.
 * "Level 5 mustache detected!"
 * "SYSTEM MAY BE BUSY OR MELTING INTO SLAG."
 * "You lost everything. Way to go, genius."
 * "404 computer hamsters not found."
 * "THREAT LEVEL UPGRADED TO JELLY ROLL 1. DETONATION IMMINENT. BEEBLEBLIP!"
 * When he's searching his databanks for Mario's identification, his eye becomes the Wii Shop Channel loading screen, and he makes the same sound.
 * CTRL ALT DEL
 * Merlee and Mimi's catfight was surprisingly hilarious as well, including this wonderful line:

I am hot, no need to brag.

And you...well, you’re a hag!"

"Bowser: How many times do I have to tell those idiots? If you're the last one in, LOCK THE GATE!"
 * Bowser in the beginning cutscene.

"Merlumina: And... You're sleeping again!?"
 * When the Cragnon chief is explaining that the Floro Sapiens have been making off with his people, he gives us this: "Now rescue team of Cragnons need to BE rescued!"
 * "Nerd Cragnons name them Floro Sapiens."
 * A minor one can come in just how King Croacus looks. This troper remembers bursting out laughing the first time she saw him.
 * In reference to the sleeping at the top of the page, Merlumina is the only one to ever realize that Mario fell asleep.

"Tippi: "Disappeared through a pipe, did they?"
 * Flint Cragley. Everything about him. CRAGLEY HO!
 * Also the fact that, of all things, you have to rescue his camera crew for him.
 * The Catch Card description for the Dark Megabite: "This thing wants to end you. That's all."
 * A lot of Catch Cards, actually; Schlorp: "It's a vacuum cleaner! It's a worm! It's both! Don't feed it bombs, or you'll ruin its appetite. Forever."
 * "This Dark Ninjoe creeps around a certain secret pit. They move at the speed of DEADLY."
 * A minor one but it shows a lot. After Mimi insults Peach for not being a fighter (stating that she has two 'boyfriends' to protect her), Peach stands her ground and tells Mario and Luigi to let her fight alone. After she screams if they understood, they don't object. They just stare each other say 'sure' and WALK BACKWARDS away from the Princess.
 * In Chapter 5, the Floro Sapiens capture some Cragnons and go down a pipe.

Bowser: "What am I, blind? Shut up.""

"Luigi: Oh no! I don't give my name to scoundrels! Just watch as Luigi punishes you for your badness!
 * Its interlude is golden. Nastasia punishes O'Chunks by forcing him to sing an song in Count Bleck's favor 1,000 TIMES! GOLD!
 * A lot of Luigi's lines are funny.

Luigi: I'm my bro's bro.

Luigi: The G-Great Luigi, you say? A... A daring defender? ...Me? Then I've got no choice! Luigi must spring into action! My fans need me!"

""We have defeated your king. Get over it.""
 * No love for Fleep, the flipping Pixl?! To recap, he's been in the bathroom in Chapter 4 for 100 years, waiting for someone to bring him toilet paper. All the while, he sings nonsensical songs in a Spanish accent at the top of his lungs, punctuating each verse with "AMOOOOOOOOOOOORE!"
 * The other Pixls can be quite funny too, such as Boomer. To make sure that you and he are compatible, he asks you a series of questions, to each of which you have a choice of two answers...which are both always in the affirmative.
 * If you listen to Garson's story about the Ancients, he says that they spread word of the Pure Hearts and the legendary hero by building civilizations. If you're thinking that way, this can be summed up as them saving the universe by boning kingdoms into existence... Well, read the story he tells for context.
 * After defeating King Croacus, Tippi says quite possibly the most awesomely nonchalant line in the whole game.

""[Character] dodges like a pro"
 * The Underchomp battle, which is one big Shout Out to the MOTHER series. The text in the battle in just ridiculous.

"Oh no! It's putrid!"

"Now that's hot!""

"Mr. L: ""Awwww, WHAT?! No way! My Brobot L-type shoots missiles. MISSILES!"
 * From when you beat Mr. L in his Brobot L-Type:

"So let me get this clear: you want to not breathe?"
 * Tippi's snarky lines when you keep refusing to wear a space helmet.


 * In Dyllis's kitchen: "Here, ve take flavor, und ve SPANK IT!"
 * Near the ending of the game, Peach mentions she, Bowser, Luigi fell through the floor. Bowser landed fine, she landed on Bowser and comments it was a surprisingly soft landing, then she proceeds to mention they found Luigi knocked out.