Raiders of the Lost Ark/Funny

"Indy: There's a big snake in the plane, Jock! Jock: Oh, that's just my pet snake Reggie! Indy: I hate snakes, Jock! I HATE 'EM! Jock: Come on! Show a little backbone, will ya?"
 * The film opens with Indy braving death traps, scary spiders, waves of angry natives trying to kill him, and he pretty much takes it all in stride. Get him on the plane with a snake as a fellow passenger, though...

"Sallah: The dog? You were named after the DOG? *uproarious laughter*"
 * The scene of Indy facing down a mean sword fighter in the Cairo market. The Mook spends two minutes twirling the blade menacingly, after which Indy makes a "Why bother?" face, pulls out his gun and shoots him.
 * Better: that look on Indy's face is actual pain from the dystentery that forced the "just shoot him" moment in the first place.
 * Even better than that, the villagers swooping in on the Mook's corpse and stealing his sword, cheering enthusiastically.
 * Sallah: Asps. Very dangerous. (taps Indy on the shoulder) You go first.
 * Most anything Sallah says or does is pretty good for a laugh from when he screams at the statue in the Well of Souls to his very last scene when he cracks up laughing over the origin of the name "Indiana."

"Marion: You say something?"
 * "I'm so pleased you're not dead!"
 * Also, after the desert chase, when Indy is examining his wounds in a mirror, and Marion flips the mirror around, whanging him on the chin. Cut to exterior shot of the ship they're on, and the most anguished scream ever.

"Belloq: "What a fitting end to your life's pursuits. You're about to become a permanent addition to this archeological find. Who knows? In a thousand years even you may be worth something." Indiana: (smiling) "Ahahahahh!..." (slowly panicking) "sonofabitch...""
 * Indy stealing the uniform of the Officer that questioned how badly the first uniform he stole fits him.
 * Blink and you'll miss it, but you can actually see Indy sizing up the officer, trying to see if his clothes are the right size before knocking him out.
 * The DVD special features have some utterly hilarious footage of Spielberg chastising one the snakes from the Well of Souls scene after discovering that, being cold blooded, snakes actually like to be close to fire. "You like fire? But it says in the script that you hate fire. Why do you like fire? You're ruining my movie!"
 * Toht advances on Marion, pulling out what looks like a nasty torture device...which he then folds into a coat hanger.
 * And it's based on a deleted scene from 1941 (done for that film by Christopher Lee!), which Spielberg swore he'd try to put in all of his movies until it stayed in.
 * Indiana's reaction to Belloq's mocking as he's trapped in the Well of Souls:


 * In the bar fight, Indy and a Mook are grappling over a gun and another mook is told "Shoot zem... shoot zem both." They promptly, of one mind, both turn and shoot the other mook.