Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles/Funny

Animated Series
"Hun: Who are you talking to? Why do you keep doing that?! THERE'S NO ONE THERE!""
 * Turtles Forever has quite a few, such as the fourth wall being broken by 1987 Raphael. Especially the third time.

"Leonardo: The Utron Shredder isn't like your Shredder. He's vicious.
 * The Mirage Shredder's appearance is cut short when
 * The 2003 Turtles sum up the difference between the two cartoons:
 * The 2003 Turtles sum up the difference between the two cartoons:

Donatello: Lethal!

Michelangelo: Competent!"

"Did I bonk my head, or am I seeing double?"
 * 2003 Mikey's initial reactions to the 1987 Turtles and their opponents. That and a brief exchange with his counterpart on 2003 Raphael's attitude.
 * 2003 Mikey Tempting Fate by asking his counterparts if the Turtle Blimp can go any faster. He knows he shouldn't have asked, after what happens next.
 * Poor Casey...

""I'm not your stepbrother--I'm your half-sister!""
 * The Soap Opera that Master Splinter was watching. Watch out for his reaction.


 * In the original cartoon episode "Blast From The Past" the ghost tells Shredder that in order to prove he is the original Foot Clan sensei he must perform the dreaded "Cur-Li Maneuver" he makes it clear he doesn't know it, later Splinter after regaining his memory demonstrates it, it consists of dancing around his opponent going "woo woo, woo" like Curly from the Three Stooges, slapping his opponent and bonking them on the head going "nyuk, nyuk, nyuk".

The movies
 "Donny and Mikey: Dan nan na... Ninjitsu! Well it's sort of like meditating."
 * Leonardo grabs on a bike hanging on the ceiling and starts kicking the Foot ninjas. The handle breaks off, he falls and three ninjas jump on him.
 * Donny and Mikey during "meditation".

"Michelangelo: (While Leonardo is slicing the pizza) Yes, friends, it's the new turbo-ginsu! It slices, it dices and makes french fries in thirty different- (One slice lands on Splinter) Whoops!
 * The pizza slice scene in the beginning.

Splinter: Hm...kids."

"Casey: * kisses the club* I'll never call golf a dull game again."
 * And after Casey knocks out Tatsu with a golf driver:

"Donatello: Question.
 * And:

Michealangelo: Yeah?

Donatello: Do you like Penicillin on your pizza?

Michealangelo: D'oh!"

"Casey: (Raph has just knocked him down) New game, round-head. (Pulls out cricket bat) Cricket?
 * In Central Park, where Casey and Raph first meet and fight each other.

Raph: Cricket?! Nobody understands cricket! You gotta know what a crumpet is to understand cricket!

Casey: I'll teach you! (Whacks Raph with the bat, sending him headfirst into a trash can.)"

""Ninja kick the damn rabbit!""
 * Mikey and Donny watch a version of The Tortoise and the Hare on TV and don't like the rabbit effortlessly winning early on.

 "Donatello: The perimeter's quiet.
 * When they came to rescue Raph:

Leonardo: Yeah, a little too quiet.

After successfully infiltrating deeper into the junkyard...

Donatello: Well, that was easy.

Leonardo: Yeah, a little too easy.

Donatello: Look, it's Raph!

Michelangelo: Yeah, a little too Raph!

Leonardo: (bonks Mikey on the head) You guys, knock it off!

Donatello: (Face Palm) Oh brother."

"Shredder: Stupid!"
 * Mikey tickling Tokka's feet when he's stuck on the manhole.

"Keno: What are we looking for anyway?
 * Mikey getting jumped by Foot Ninjas at the junkyard, only for him to find his way out of the attack; his enemies continue to punch, completely unaware that they're only hitting dirt now.
 * Mikey pulled this trick during their fight with the robbers in the beginning of the second film. In the scene behind Don when he hogties a robber.
 * After Keno helps Raph sneak into the Foot's hideout:

Raph: Quiet. You wanna get us... [Tatsu sneaks from behind them] caught? Yeah, hi, we were looking for a muffler for a '77 Chevy.

[Tatsu grunts and a bunch of Foot Ninjas appear]

Raph: Sheesh! Whatever happen to service with a smile? [Raph casually leans on some tires, then he throws one at Tatsu and the ninjas]

Raph: (to Keno) Run! Or I'll kick your butt!

Raph: (kicking around) Excuse me! Pardon me!"

"Raph: I'm curious, any of you guys hear the expression "fair fight"?"
 * When the ninjas jump on him:

"Raph: You know pal, if I had a face like yours, I try to make it up for with some sort of a personality."
 * Follow by an insult to Tatsu right in front of him.

"Mikey: Its a good thing we saw you coming from our roof-- [Leo kicks him] Ow! I mean, from across-- [Raph dope slaps him] OOOWWWWWW!"
 * Leo and Raph shutting Mikey up when he almost give away their location to Keno.

"Don: So, you [April] didn't see Raph?
 * Leo's angry rant about Raph's going solo.

Leo: Yeah, well, if you do, tell him thanks for wasting our time! Because instead of looking out for the Foot and the ooze, like we SHOULD, we'll have to go and look for him instead!

[Throws angrily a heavy box he was holding on the floor, right on Don's feet.]

April: What was that?

Don: [in pain] Leo says "hi"."

"Mikey: Hey Donny, give me the phone! Please! Please!
 * Then we have Mikey chasing Don, begging to give him the phone, while Don hops away with one leg because of his crushed foot.

Don: Let us know if you hear something...

[we cut to April, hearing indistinct chattering]

Don: No! No! Oh oh alright, here! *sigh*

Mikey: April? It's Mikey! I just like to say... helloooo. *kiss, kiss,*

Don: Would you give me that!"

"Perry: What did you expect? That they'd come out quoting Macbeth?
 * When the transformed Tokka and Rahzar first emerge from their pens, Shredder prepares to assert his dominance by fighting them into submission: "When this is over, you will call me Master!" This proves to be unnecessary- the two 'monsters' promptly imprint Shredder as their surrogate mother and start to hug him, crooning "Mama!" Shredder is not pleased.
 * Shredder shouting "BABIES!! THEY'RE BABIES!!" before making a weird "OORAAAAWAAAAH" sound, though this is more Narm than anything it's still funny.

Shredder: They are stupid!

Perry: They're not stupid, they're infants! [They bonk each other on the head with some metal pipes] Okay, they're stupid infants..."

"Raph: SHREDDEERRRRR!!
 * Raph: "I'm being punished, aren't I?!"
 * While trying to sneak into the construction site unnoticed.

[The Turtles were startled and glare at Raph.]

Don: Thanks Raph! I may never have the hiccups again!

[The Foot appear]"

"Leo: You take the ugly one.
 * The fight against Tokka and Rahzar.

Raph: No, you take the ugly one!

Don: I'll take the ugly one!

Mike: Which one's the ugly one?"

"Leo: I never touched it!"
 * When Rahzar finds the anti-mutagen cubes inside the donuts, Leo points at Mike holding the donut box.

"Raph: Hey, Mikey, you think you can crunch a little louder? (Gestures to where his ear would be) I can still hear outta this one!
 * The Turtles are watching one of April's reports on TV. Raph is not amused, even more aggrivated by Mikey loudly chewing on a candy bar.

Mikey: (Aside Glance, shrugs, leans in close, and CHOMP!)

Raph: Auugh! Ah! That-- dah."

"Raph: Can I hurt him? Pleeease! Tell me I can hurt him. Please. Please!"
 * Raph gets a Foot ninja in a headlock and taunts one of his comrades. The taunted ninja attempts to hit Raph, but Raph pulls his ally's head into it first.
 * "I got two words that will solve all our problems... Time Share!"
 * "Hmmmm... Not quite ripe yet"
 * After Keno steps on Raph's foot:

 "Don: Uh, Ohiyo wasabi.
 * As Don, Leo, and Raph are Dressing As the Enemy, Don and Raph are caught by two guards.

Raph: *Beat* 'Hello mustard'?

Don: My Japanese is a little rusty.

(Don attempts more Gratuitous Japanese. Raph just boredly Offhand Backhands the two guards with both fists.)

Raph: How about 'Sayonara?'"


 * I ask you, what could be funnier than a bunch of poor samurai transported to a sewer in nothing but the "bare" essentials? Oh I know, one of them in boxers!
 * "Help! I'm a turtle and I can't get up!"

 "Raph [in a singsong voice]: Aw, he's so cute! You want a butt-kicking, little guy? Yes you do. Yes, you do!"
 * Raph comes upon a tiny little monster destroying a place.

"Karai (in a completely deadpan tone): You'd think that they'd be more concerned about the thirteenth monster...
 * All culminating in being bit on the finger.
 * The final chase scene with the Thirteenth Monster, April and Casey are arguing about reckless driving, to which Karai says:

(The Foot Ninja sitting next to her nods at her statement)"