A Pickle for the Knowing Ones

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A Pickle for the Knowing Ones or Plain Truths in a Homespun Dress is an autobiographical book published in 1802. The author, Lord Timothy Dexter, was an eccentric American businessman who got rich by making a series of horrible business decisions that, due to luck, turned out to be extremely profitable. [1] The book has no punctuation and capitalization is seemingly random (the author responded to complaints about this by giving the second edition an extra page full of punctuation marks, with the suggestion that the readers "solt and peper it as they plese"). As for the content, it's basically the author ranting about various things that irritate him and displaying his poor knowledge of how politics work.

You can read it here.

Tropes used in A Pickle for the Knowing Ones include:

if I had not the gost in my hous, I would give Lite to my brothers & sisters, and have a pease all over the world, and beat the trouthe into my frinds. houe gud it is -- houe onnest it would be -- and houe mankind has bin in posed and houe thay have bin blinded by untrouths, gosts and mister Divels [2]

I was born when grat powers Rouled -- I was borne in 1747, Janeuarey 22; on this day, in the morning, A grat snow storme -- the sines in the seventh house wives; mars Came fored -- Joupeter stud by holding the Candel -- I was to be one grat man; mars got the beth to be onnest man, to Doue good to my felow mortels. [3]

  1. An example of one of these horrible business decisions: Sending coal to Newcastle. As in a place built on the coal-mining industry (thus the phrase "Coals to Newcastle" meaning "giving them something they have too much of already"). What happened just before it got there? The coal miners went on strike.
  2. If I had not the ghost in my house, I would give Light to my brothers & sisters, and have Peace all over the world and beat the truth into my friends. How good it is -- how honest it would be -- and how mankind has been imposed and how they have been blinded by untruths, ghosts and Mr. Devils.
  3. I was born when great powers ruled -- I was born in 1747, January 22; on this day, in the morning, a great snow storm -- the signs in the seventh housewives; Mars came forward -- Jupiter stood by holding the candle -- I was to be one great man; Mars got the beth to be honest man, to do good to my fellow mortals.