A World of Laughter, A World of Tears/Funny

Everything About Fiction You Never Wanted to Know.


  • Orson Welles and Ed Wood preparing to leave for the Oscars:

Ed Wood: Why, Orson? What're we gonna do tonight?
Orson Welles: The same thing we do every night, Eddie. Try to take over the movies!

"Surprised you pulled me away" I mumbled. "Two more hits, and I would've been arrested for murder. You could've had me out of the White House." [Dodd] grinned in that infuriating way that he had, and said "Yeah, I thought of that. But, see, you would've killed Rockwell, and I figured it's a little too late in the day for me to start liking you over something like that." We looked at each other, and he chuckled, and I did too, and pretty soon we were laughing like maniacs together. He's a little shit, sure, but hell, he had his moments.

  • A young Kim-Jong Il ending the Korean War by asking his father why they're fighting Mickey Mouse and Donald Duck.
  • Pat Boone getting the number one song on American Bandstand.
  • A 13-year-old Bill Clinton nicknaming the Disney Defenders "tits."
  • The Beach Boys being introduced to marijuana.
  • Orson Welles' Bedmate Reveal with Vampira, who he also got engaged to during the night.
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