Batman Returns/Funny

Everything About Fiction You Never Wanted to Know.


  • When Selina and Bruce realize who the other one really is at a posh party as they're dancing, Selina blurts worriedly, "Oh, my God. Does this mean we have to start fighting?"
  • "Saved by kitty litter."
  • In the middle of the intense climax, this moment occurs:

Schreck: (to unmasked Batman) Bruce Wayne? Why are you dressed up as Batman?
Catwoman: Because he is Batman, you moron.

    • Followed by Schreck's Deadpan reply, "Was." and he shoots Batman.
    • During the same scene: Schreck staring at his gun in utter disbelief after his fourth bullet fails to kill Selina.
  • "My troops are sprawling town for your children! Yes, for your firstborn sons! The one you left defenseless at home so you can dress up like jerks, get juiced, and dance... badly!"
  • "Don't hurt us, lady! Our take-home is only $300!"

Catwoman: (To security officers) "You're overpaid, hit the road."

  • When Selina is trying to explain to Alfred that her leaving abruptly is not a sign of rejection towards Bruce, she stumbles over what she wants him to relay to Bruce and instead asks Alfred if he could come up with a sonnet or a dirty limerick on her behalf. Without missing a beat, Alfred kindly responds with an amused smile that "one just came to mind".