Beam Me Up, Scotty/Quotes

"Why do these films always forget to put their most famous lines in?"

—David Mitchell, QI

Kyon: "Nyoro~n" is a portmanteau of "nyoro" (Tsuruya's idiosyncratic speech quirk, her "desu" what have you) and the Japanese onomatopeia for dejection. The tilde isn't "pronounced" anything, it's a damn sound lengthener, as in "nyorooooon", so all you idiots going "nyoroOoOon" can shut the fuck up! Furthermore (and this is important), Tsuruya never, ever, says "Nyoro~n." She says nyoro, do you fucking understand? "Nyoro~n" is a creation of Eretto, the author of the Churuya comics. She doesn't fucking say it. Do you understand? She doesn't fucking say it. She doesn't fucking say it. She doesn't fucking say it. She doesn't fucking say it. She doesn't fucking say it. There."

Churuya: Nyoro~n...

—Danbooru post #99340 (shopped churuya 4koma)

Commander Frack: "Baroness, Baroness! I can't find my nail file! Call a meeting, call a meeting!"

Destro: I've never said that, you idiot!

—Cobra's Chia Plot - Part III

"Beam me up, Scotty!"

—Nobody in any Canon installment of the Star Trek franchise. Ever.

"A friend of mine once told me nobody on Star Trek ever said "Beam me up, Scotty." I nodded at his knowledge of this, picked up his pet turtle, and hurled that sonuvabitch down the street. "

—LetsPlay Clock Tower 3

"With great power comes great responsibility"
That's the catchphrase of old Uncle Ben,
If you missed it, don't worry, they'll say the line

Again and again and again.
—"Weird Al" Yankovic (referring to the movie)

'"Right," said Richard. And he smiled unconvincingly and added, "Well, lead on, MacDuff." ...
...

The abbot sipped his tea, in silence. And then he said, with honest regret in his voice, "It's 'lay on, MacDuff,' actually. But I hadn't the heart to correct him."'

—Neverwhere by Neil Gaiman

"'Lead On, MacDuff,' is a common and perfectly acceptable phrase. It appears in important works of fact and fiction from a dozen different worlds. Even if it was originally a misquotation, it's earned its own place in any idiomatic pantheon"

—Jack Frost, Jack of Fables

"Well that's another fine mess you've gotten us into!"

—People who quote Oliver Hardy.

"Luke, I am your father."

—Everyone who has ever imitated Darth Vader

Lewton: Play it again, Sam.

Samael: You know what? No one's ever going to believe you said that.

—Discworld Noir

Rat: First off, it's "Frankly, my dear" not "Frankly, Scarlett"

—Pearls Before Swine, January 31, 2010

Everyone knows the scene where Lassie barks at her family, and the family responds: "What is it girl? Timmy's fallen down the well again?" Well, first of all, Timmy never actually fell down a well. Just down mine shafts, off cliffs and into rivers, lakes and quicksand. Don't you feel dumb now.

—Cracked sets things straight for us in The 5 Stupidest Ways Movies Deal With Foreign Languages.

I may disagree with what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to mis-attribute this quote to Voltaire.

—Avram Grumer, rec.arts.sf.written, May 2000

Weisinger, a couple of years ago, made up the following story: "Isaac Asimov was asked how Superman could fly faster than the speed of light, which was supposed to be an absolute limit. To this Asimov replied, 'That the speed of light is a limit is a theory; that Superman can travel faster than light is a fact.'"
I assure you it never happened and I never said it, but it will be repeated, I am quite certain, indefinitely, and it will probably be found in Bartlett's quotations a century from now, attributed to me, after all my writings have been forgotten.

—Isaac Asimov, "Science Fiction, 1938" Nebula Winners 14 (1980) edited by Frederick J. Pohl, p. 97

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