Buffy the Vampire Slayer/Recap/S2/E09 What's My Line? Part 1

Everything About Fiction You Never Wanted to Know.


The school is decked out in balloons and banners galore, celebrating the start of "Career Week." Buffy is fatalistic because the students around her are dreaming of the future, while her career as Slayer is already set in stone.

Dru is laying tarot cards whilst another vampire attempts to translate an ancient text, with Spike glaring over his shoulder. The translation is nonsensical and even Dalton (the transcriber vampire) can't figure it out. Spike is reaching the end of his patience and grabs Dalton, ready to beat him up, when he's interrupted by Dru. She looks up from her cards and says that they need a key to decode the scripture.

While out on patrol Buffy witnesses Dalton chiseling something out of a mausoleum wall, but he escapes when she is distracted by another vampire. She enters her bedroom through the window out of habit (despite the fact that her mother is out of town) and finds Angel waiting, as usual. He spots a picture of Baby Buffy on ice-skates, and Buffy explains she used ice skating as an escape when her parents fought, which was often. Angel proposes they go sneak into the ice rink tomorrow evening when it's closed.

At school the next morning, the test results are revealed -- much to the chagrin of Buffy and Xander, who are railroaded into Law Enforcement and the Department of Correction, respectively. Willow, meanwhile, is quietly ushered into a VIP area with classical music and a white-jacketed waiter ("Try the canapé"). Some suits announce that she's to be recruited by a leading software company, along with Oz, the boy who has been watching her for weeks.

Spike and Drusilla examine the key stolen by Dalton, a gold cross. Spike decides to call the Order of Taraka, an ancient guild of assassins, to keep the Slayer off his back for a while.

Buffy points Giles to the crypt from earlier. Giles realizes with concern that Josephus du Lac (a theologian who was excommunicated by the Vatican) is buried there. He is the author of the book stolen from the library, and Giles believes the decoder key was stolen from his reliquary.

In the meantime, the assassins begin to arrive separately. A large biker-type dude with one eye gouged out exits a bus; a young Jamaican girl stows away in the cargo hold of a plane; a nerdy, innocuous door-to-door salesman struts past Buffy's house to her next-door neighbors'. He kills the woman by disintegrating into hundreds of writhing mealworms which can reshape themselves into limbs at will.

Buffy manages to keep her ice skating date with Angel. The one-eyed assassin chooses this moment to strike. Angel arrives in time to help fend him off while Buffy kills him with the blade of her skate. Angel, recognizing the assassin's ring, asks Buffy if she knows what it means (I just killed a Super Bowl Champ?), and then warns her that she should split from Sunnydale. The female from the plane watches from the shadows.

Buffy is jittery and suspicious of everyone now. After sunset, Buffy trudges back home, but rethinks it, unaware of the salesman ("Norman") staking out her place with binoculars. She decides keep walking to Angel's place.

Angel goes looking for information on who placed the hit on Buffy. A bar owner, Willy, finally confirms Angel's suspicions that Spike is behind the assassins, but before Angel can leave, he's attacked by the mysterious female. They fight, and she locks him in a metal cage in front of an eastern window, with only a few short hours until sunrise.

Giles phones Xander and asks him to go to Buffy's house and check on her. Giles awakens Willow, who had fallen asleep ("Don't warn the tadpoles!") and reveals that the missing manuscript is a ritual to restore a weakened vampire back to health.

Cut to Revello Drive, where Xander and his grouchy chauffeur (Cordelia) have just arrived. As Xander goes searching, Cordy hears a knock at the door and lets in Mr. Mealworm, again appearing as a cosmetics salesman promising free samples.

Meanwhile, Buffy has decided to crash on Angel's bed. She awakens in time to dodge to the Jamaican girl standing over her with an axe ("You must be number two"). They wrestle for a bit, and Jamaican girl asks to know who Buffy is. Buffy, confused, demands her who she is.

"I am Kendra, the Vampire Slayer."

Tropes used in Buffy the Vampire Slayer/Recap/S2/E09 What's My Line? Part 1 include:

Angel: You shouldn't have to touch me when I'm like this.
Buffy: I didn't even notice.

Angel: Sure you are, Willy. And I'm taking up sunbathing.

Buffy: "I just killed a Super Bowl champ?"

Buffy: (stunned) As in police?
Xander: As in polyester, doughnuts and brutality.

Willow: But, doughnuts!

  • Bait and Switch: Kendra is shown instead of the third assassin, hiding the fact that she's actually a Slayer.
  • Bare Your Midriff: Kendra.
  • Be Careful What You Wish For
  • Beard of Evil: Dalton's goatee.
  • Beast and Beauty: Buffy insists on kissing Angel even though he's in Game Face.
  • Belligerent Sexual Tension: Are we working up to a Xander/Cordelia romance or what?
  • Bounty Hunter: "They have no earthly desire except to collect their bounty." Though one would think money is an earthly desire.
  • Bridal Carry: Spike doing the Dance of Romance with Drusilla.
  • Brick Joke: Xander looks forward to returning Snyder's honesty with some "honest" input of his own. Well, amusingly, in "Restless" he gets his wish. ("You know, I never got the chance to tell you how glad I was you were eaten by a snake.")
  • Call Back: The book that was stolen by the blonde vampire in "Lie To Me" is one of the main elements of this episode.
  • Can't You Read the Sign?: Willy barking at Angel that the bar's closed.
  • Captain Obvious: Buffy didn't see what was swiped from the mausoleum, but she "can take a guess and say it was something old." (Giles is less than pleased at her work ethic.)
    • Dalton reminding us hat Buffy almost caught him red-handed the night before, and that "she's trouble."

Spike: (looks at him) YOU DON'T SAY!

  • Carnival of Killers: "Some are human, some are...not."
  • The Cast Showoff: SMG clearly has spent a little time on skates before.
  • Cat Fight: The Slayers continue grappling for the axe until Buffy begs Bianca not to make her do "the chick fight thing." Kendra:"Chick fight??" By way of answering, Buffy digs her nails into Bianca's wrist and pulls her hair.
  • Cat Scare: Buffy hilariously pegging Oz for a hitman. Who sent you?!

Oz: (to himself) This is a tense person.

  • Cliff Hanger
  • Continuity Nod: Darla asks Angel in the Season one Episode, "Angel", if he believes Buffy would ever be able to kiss his 'real face'. She does in this episode.
  • Chekhov's Gun: The book stolen from Giles in "Lie to Me" is explained.
  • Chekhov's Gunman: While darting her eyes around the school corridor looking for suspicious people, Buffy unknowingly walks right past the third assassin.
  • Cliff Hanger
  • Deadly Delivery: "Hello! I'm Norman Pfister with Blush Beautiful Skin Care."
  • Death Glare: Xander excruciatingly putting his foot in his mouth in front of Snyder.
  • Death Trap
  • Description Cut: Buffy reiterating that her future is a non-issue. Fade to Drusilla's hand turning over Tarot cards.
  • Did Not Do the Research: Baby Buffy was far too young to idolize Dorothy Hamill, the 1976 Olympic gold medalist.
  • Diegetic Theme Cameo: Dru assures Spike that he'll prevail, and they kiss as a music-box music plays, which amusingly enough is Dru's theme music.
  • Digging Yourself Deeper: Xander tries to butter Snyder up with talk of going to "Principal School", but ends up calling him a tiny person with little feet and finally stops talking.
  • Dismantled MacGuffin: The Du Lac Cross can be used to decipher mystical texts, such as Spike's book. Buffy wonders why du Lac destroyed most of them, and Giles speculates that he feared what would happen if one of the crosses fell into the wrong hands.
  • Divide and Conquer: The Order of Taraka's official credo.
  • Don't Sneak Up On Me Like That: Buffy's pleased to be the one to sneak up on Angel, for once. He spins around in shock, still clutching a stuffed pig, and this is about as precious a moment as you're going to get from Angel.

Buffy: Now you know what it feels like, Stealth Guy.

    • How Buffy meets Oz, to his regret.
  • Dude in Distress: Angel.
  • Dynamic Entry / Say My Name: A Octarus chokes Buffy, Angel comes rushing in, game face on, and performs a flying tackle on him.
  • Enter Stage Window
  • The Evil Genius: Spike's transcriber, Dalton. "He's a wanker, but he's the only one we've got with half a brain."
  • Exact Eavesdropping: Across the rink, Kendra observes Buffy and Angel macking with distaste.
  • Failed a Spot Check: A dizzied Angel asks who Kendra is, and says he won't hurt her if she coughs up some information. She smirks. He doesn't get the joke (surprise, surprise) and asks what's so funny, but as she backs up a bit, we see that he's in a mesh steel cage, the door to which she slams closed.

Kendra: I tink it is funny now.

  • Fair Cop: Buffy can look forward to an exciting career as a police officer. Or carving stakes for a nursery.
  • Feet First Introduction: One-eyed assassin exiting the bus, and Kendra exiting the plane.
  • Foreshadowing: Willow's characteristically psyched to find out her career track, but Xander complains that it takes the fun out of being young and stupid. "I'd rather live in the dark." One Basement Dweller, coming up.
  • Fun with Foreign Languages: It turns out du Lac's incantation wasn't really Latin, but a cipher meant to look like like it to the casual observer.
  • Girls Love Stuffed Animals: Mr. Gordo.
  • Good Scars, Evil Scars: Octarus, a mean looking, wild-haired man with criss-cross scars across his milky-white right eye.
  • Grand Romantic Gesture
  • His Name Is--: Angel is just about to get Willy to talk when he gets clocked with a broom.
  • Hollywood Nerd: Pasty, milquetoast Norman Pfister.
  • Hurricane of Euphemisms: "'Trouble?' She's the gnat in my ear. The gristle in my teeth. She's the bloody thorn in my BLOODY SIDE! (kicks table)
  • Hypocritical Humor: Buffy chiding Angel that Joyce is away on a business trip, so they don't have to whisper. Cue Angel asking the obvious question, namely why she came in through the window. Buffy's face falls through a long pause. "Habit."
    • Giles has been indexing the Watcher diaries, and is amazed at how "numbingly pompous and long-winded" some of them are.
  • I Just Want to Be Normal: Buffy again.
  • Lame Excuse: Snyder demanding to know where Buffy is, and telling Willow not to feed him the 'I just saw her a minute ago, she's around here somewhere' routine.
  • I Work Alone: The assassins each stick to their own peculiar style.
  • Implacable Man: Buffy's chagrined that Giles thinks she can't fight off a couple hitmen, but he explains that they will keep coming no matter how many she kills.
  • Improvised Weapon: Buffy burying her ice skate in Octarus' throat.
    • Kendra snapping a wooden broom handle in half, then going to take Angel.
    • Buffy grabbing Angel's bed curtain and pulling it over Kendra's head.
  • Incredibly Lame Fun: Ooh! Ooh! Research party!

Xander: (to Willow) You need a life in the worst way.

Cordelia: Oh, great, so now I'm your taxi and your punching bag.
Xander: I like to think of you more as my witless foil, but have it your way.

  • Kicked Across the Room: Kendra booting Angel into a storeroom.
  • Layman's Terms: "So you're saying these vampires went to all this hassle for your basic decoder ring?" Giles, taken aback by the metaphor, nonetheless agrees this is the case.
  • Let's You and Him Fight: Kendra seeing Buffy kissing Angel (in vamp face) and assuming she's his undead honey.
  • Little Stowaway: Kendra.
  • Meet Cute: The look on Oz’s face when he glances over and realizes the girl he’s been obsessed with for weeks is sitting next to him in a private room "Canapé?"
  • Metaphorgotten: Giles stressing that Buffy's calling shouldn't hold her back from acquiring gainful employment -- just as he did.

"Uh, Giles, it's one thing to be a Watcher and a librarian. They go together like chicken and... another chicken, or... two chickens, or... something. You know what I'm saying!"

  • Murder, Inc.: The Order of Taraka.
  • My Hovercraft Is Full of Eels: Dalton attempting to translate Latin for Spike comes up with "Debase... the beef... canoe". Spike's response, as can be expected, is, "Why does that strike me as not right?"
  • Neck Lift: "Some people find pain very inspirational."
    • Buffy coming in for a landing at the rink, accidentally sliding in on her butt.. She laughs, but loses her good humor when Octarus' bicep hooks around her grabs her and lifts her over the wall.
    • Later in the battle, he grabs Angel by the throat. What is his deal?
    • Poor Oz coming up the hall behind Buffy, causing her to whirl around, grabs him by the throat and pins him to the locker, challenging him to "try it!!"

Buffy: Uh... (realizes her mistake) I-I'm sorry.
Oz: Still not clear what I'm supposed to try.

Dalton: Uh, yes, but... The Order of Taraka, I mean... isn't that overkill?
Spike: No, I think it's just enough kill.

  • Not Herself: Xander knows Buffy didn't go home, because his call went unanswered and "it's a statistical impossibility for a sixteen-year-old-girl to unplug her phone." Giles looks at Willow, who cutely nods confirmation.
  • Obligatory Joke: "The Hellmouth presents: Dead Guys On Ice."
  • Oh Crap: Giles lays down the heavy news (about the unstoppable assassins), and Buffy looks ready to cry.
    • Angel caged.
  • Overly Narrow Superlative: Cordelia verbalizing her test question. "'I aspire to help my fellow man.' Check. ...As long as he's not smelly, dirty or something gross."

Xander: "Cordelia Chase, always ready to give a helping hand to the rich and the pretty.

Xander: "That's what a lot of the guys say, but it's just locker-room talk."

'Willow: If she doesn't get back soon, Snyder's really... (spots him on the stairs) ...done a great job with the fair this year, hasn't he, Xander?

  • Run or Die: Angel gets one look at the assassin's insignia and tells Buffy to head for the hills. Giles inclines to agree.
  • Schmuck Bait: Norman talking his way into a woman's home with the promise of "free samples."
  • Scream Discretion Shot: Norman killing Mrs Kalish. Cut to the scream of an airliner's jet engines.
  • Shaped Like Itself: Buffy jogging ahead of Giles as a means of exacting revenge for his "criticisms" earlier, leaving him gasping for breath. He wheezes that she's behaving immaturely, but she points out that she's a teen, and has "yet to mature."
  • Shout-Out: Marti Noxon originally envisioned the ice skate killing to be far bloodier, as an homage to Fargo.
  • Sidetracked by the Analogy: "They had tools, flashlights, whole nine yards. What does that mean anyway? 'Whole nine yards'? Nine yards of what? (beat) Now it's gonna bug me all day."
  • Sinister Minister: Josephus du Lac and his sect wrote a number of books containing dark rituals, resulting in du Lac being defrocked.
  • Smash Cut: Giles trying to get Buffy's head out of the clouds, saying that they need to discover what the vamps took. Cut to a shot of a large ornate gold cross.
  • Smart People Wear Glasses / Waistcoat of Style: Dalton is the first vampire we see wearing these -- his specialty is transcribing Tome of Eldritch Lore.
  • A Spot of Tea: As Giles monologues about the deep crap Buffy is in, a bunch of larvae coalesce on Norman's stump of an arm. Norman uses the reformed hand to daintily pick up some tea, or coffee, or whatever it is giant larvae people drink.
  • Stab the Salad: A paranoid Buffy walking through school. A teacher menacingly reaches into his coat... and pulls a comb, which he runs through his hair with an audible *shing*.
  • Stalker with a Crush: Buffy climbs in through her bedroom window ...to find Angel already there.
  • Standard Snippet: Vivaldi's "Spring" from Le Quattro Stagioni (The Four Seasons) plays in the background when Willow is escorted to the VIP lounge.
  • Stealth Insult: Xander, unintimidated, thanks Snyder for his honesty, and expresses the hope that someday he'll be able to be as "honest" with him.
  • Stock Footage: Kendra's plane landing on a tarmac.
  • Stunned Silence: Giles concedes the point about a Slayer's duty interfering with her normal job, then brightly asks if Buffy's ever thought about law enforcement. Buffy stops in her tracks, stares at him, then jerks her flashlight as a gesture to shut up and keep walking.
  • Take a Third Option: "'Are you a people person, or do you prefer keeping your own company?'" Well, what if I'm a people person who keeps his own company by default?"

Buffy: So, mark 'none of the above'.
Xander: Well, there are no boxes for 'none of the above'. That would introduce too many variables into their mushroom head, number-crunching little world.

  • Tap on the Head: An unlucky baggage handler inspecting a plane's cargo hold. He quickly gets the crap beaten out of him by Kendra, and he's out cold.
  • Tarot Troubles: Drusilla's upturned cards display -- in order -- a mausoleum (de Luc's tomb), a one-eyed monster (Octarus), a giant worm (Norman), a leopard (Kendra), and an angel (self-explanatory).
  • Teeth-Clenched Teamwork
  • There Is Another: There's a new Slayer in town.
  • Throw It In: Kendra's accent was a last-minute addition to the episode.
  • Title Drop: Buffy whining that this entire week is like a game of What's My Line?... "only I don't get to play."
  • Tom the Dark Lord: Norman Pfister. Or perhaps Names to Run Away From Really Fast, for Hitchcock fans.
  • Troubled Fetal Position: Buffy in Angel's bed.
  • Two Part Episode
  • Ultimate Job Security: Buffy plays the "Once In a Generation Card" once Giles starts driving her up the wall. "Y'know, if you don't like the way I'm doing my job, why don't you find somebody else? Oh, that's right, there can only be one."
  • Unsafe Haven: Casa Summers. Subverted, as Buffy senses something's amiss.
  • Vampire Dance: Dru playfully requesting a dance with Spike. He picks her up, swings her around, and promises that they'll dance ... right atop the Slayer's grave.
  • Villainous Demotivator: Spike motivating his translator. "Some people find pain (punches Dalton in the stomach) very inspirational."
  • Waistcoat of Style: Dalton.
  • Waking Non Sequitur: Giles finding Willow fast asleep on her keyboard, then prodding her awake. "DON'T WARN THE TADPOLES!"
  • Wham! Line: "I am Kendra, the Vampire Slayer."
  • Who Are You?: Angel and Buffy both pop this question to the Jamaican terror. Kendra later asks who Buffy who she is; Buffy bites out that as the "attackee", she gets to ask that question first.
  • The Worm That Walks: While human in appearance, Norman's real form is that of a sentient hive of maggots.