Curb Your Enthusiasm/Funny

Everything About Fiction You Never Wanted to Know.


Jeff: What happened to you?
Larry: I fell in the toilet.
Jeff: How'd you fall in the toilet?
Larry: I went to go pee and the seat was up.
Jeff: What does that have to do with you?
Larry: I pee sitting down.
Jeff: You pee sitting down?
Larry: Yeah. Have you ever tried it?
Jeff: No!

Larry: It's more comfortable, when you get up during the night you don't have to turn the light on and wake up, and you get to read.

Jeff: What are you reading?

Larry: I'm reading a lot of stuff.

Jeff: What stuff?

Larry: If I pee twenty times during the day I can get through the whole New York Times for god sake.

Jeff: Twenty times?

Larry: Yeah. Hey buddy, when you're peeing all over your shoe I'm learning something!

    • And later:

Marty: Why do you pee sitting down?
Larry: Many reasons.
Marty: You crap standing up?

  • See if this were yours it would say "fucking douchebag".