Demon Knight/Funny

Everything About Fiction You Never Wanted to Know.


  • The Collector's rant after Brayker uses the key to ward him off:

The Collector: Humans! You're not worth the flesh you're printed on! Fuck this cowboy shit! You fuckin' ho-dunk, po-dunk, well then there MOTHERFUCKERS! All you had to do was give me the god-damned key! And then we could get on with our lives!

  • The Collector suddenly appears behind Cordelia on the porch and tries to enter, only to be barred by the blood barrier. And has this to say:

The Collector: Gimme the key, Brayker, for CRYIN' OUT LOUD!

  • The Collector offering Irene her severed arm in exchange for her soul:

The Collector: Hello! I'm your waiter Skip. Our special today is a lovely poached appendage. Market price, of course. For starters, I recommend the finger food. You want your arm back on? I can make it happen.

  • Not to mention shortly after The Collector manages to get upstairs:

The Collector: Anybody home? Come on out, everybody! Time to come out and play! Hello?
(Arrow gets lodged into his head)

The Collector: Oooooor not.

The Cryptkeeper: What the hell are you doing?! You call that 'hack-ting?'
Actor: Well, yes, as a matter of fact, I do call it 'acting.'
The Cryptkeeper: Well, let me tell you something, pal -- you're no 'Gory' Cooper! You're not even a Robert 'Deadford!' Another take like that, and it'll be back to 'bit parts' for you, and I won't say what bits I'm talking about!

  • Uncle Willy's seduction, surrounded by topless women cooing and The Collector as a barkeep.