Doctor Who/Recap/S29/E01 Smith and Jones

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That was a genetic transfer!
Judoon platoon upon the moon!
The Doctor

Martha Jones heads off to a regular day at work and a strange man (The Doctor) comes up to her in the street, says "Like so!", and takes his tie off. Martha, only mildly perplexed, continues to the hospital, where she encounters the same man, calling himself "John Smith", who has been in the hospital all day and has no idea what she's talking about. To top it off, the mysterious John Smith has two hearts. Then it starts to rain upwards, and the hospital ends up on the moon. The Doctor decides that Martha, having kept his two-heart secret and not flipped out over being on the moon, is exactly the sort of person he could use for help, so he enlists her in the task of saving the hospital. Meanwhile, a herd of rhino-alien-police (Judoon) enter the hospital and begin to methodically search it for alien life, so the Doctor needs to find the malicious alien and keep himself out of rhino hands, all before the hospital's supply of oxygen runs out.

The alien in question is an old granny, a humanoid plasmavore, who is wanted for murder and has devised a plan to save herself that will kill the human population (only the half facing the moon, anyway). She imparts this plan in detail to mild-mannered John Smith and then drinks his blood, because if she drinks the blood of a human, the rhinos will think she's human. Also, to distract the rhinos for a while, the Doctor puts some of his own alien bio-bits on Martha by snogging her. No complaints from Martha.

Martha finds the plasmavore just as she drains the Doctor dry, which, unbeknownst to the plasmavore, renders her decidedly alien on any bio-scan. The Rhinos kill the plasmavore and Martha revives the Doctor, just in time for him to reverse the doomsday CT scan and save humanity. In return for saving his life, the Doctor offers Martha a quick tour of the galaxy in his TARDIS. She refuses at first, but then, in response her question of how he would prove that the TARDIS can travel through time, he steps into the TARDIS, disappears, and reappears with his tie off. See first sentence.

The Doctor promises her one little trip, just for fun, and they awkwardly agree that she's not there to replace Rose. Also, Martha's only attracted to humans. With those negotiations over with, they're on their way.

Tropes used in Smith and Jones include:
  • Arc Words: There's "Vote Saxon" signs in the alley at the end, and Mr. Saxon gets name-dropped.
  • Almost Out of Oxygen: The force-field keeps a certain amount of air in, but it starts running out quickly. Thankfully, the Judoon aren't completely merciless and teleport the hospital back once they're done.
  • Brick Joke: Oh, so that's why he said "Like so!"
  • Comically Missing the Point

"You're completely mad."
"You're right. I look daft with one shoe." (bins the other one) "Barefoot on the moon!"

  • CPR: Clean, Pretty, Reliable: Apparently CPR will fix clinical death brought on by blood loss in non-humans.
  • Eat Me
  • Getting Crap Past the Radar: "It's a Slab, basic slave drone. Solid leather, all the way through. Someone has got one hell of a fetish."
  • Hell-Bent for Leather: Parodied with the Slabs, androids composed entirely of leather. Played more straight with the Judoon however.
  • Impostor-Exposing Test: The Judoon have scanners which can distinguish humans from non-humans, which they try to use to find a plasmavore criminal hiding in a hospital. The plasmavore is able to change its physiology by drinking blood, and tries to use that to beat the test; however, the Doctor tricks it into feeding on him. Since he's a Time Lord, the scanners identify the plasmavore as non-human and kill it.
  • Improbable Weapon User: The plasmavore uses a goddamn bendy straw. And then an MRI machine which will fry the half of the Earth facing the moon.
  • Judge, Jury, and Executioner: The Judoon.
  • Meaningful Echo: Martha Jones is exuding so much calm confidence that she promises the Doctor that she will get him home. These are usually the Doctor's exact words; he looks slightly non-plussed.

Martha: I promise you, Mr. Smith, we'll find a way out.

"Crossing into established time streams is strictly forbidden. Except for cheap tricks."

"It's a screwdriver and it's...sonic."
"What else have you got? Laser spanner?"
"I did, but it was stolen by Emmeline Pankhurst. Cheeky woman."


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