Epic Battle Fantasy/Funny

Everything About Fiction You Never Wanted to Know.


  • In the third game, the first time a fire bit self-destructs on you, Lance comments "It killed itself! That rock had so much to live for!"
  • Matt, upon seeing a Viking Monolith, comments, "A giant rock! That's not very threatening! What's it going to do, fall on us?"
  • When Lance uses his Nuke Limit Break, Natalie says, "Gonna not do that? We'll die!!!"
  • This quote:

(Matt upon landing the final blow) Matt: I used my fapping arm for that attack!

  • After Natz and Lance see an active volcano and discuss how it may be related to Akron, Matt goes out of his way to say, "That volcano's causing global warming!"
  • The pre-final boss cutscene in the second game also counts.

Matt: Eh, I don´t like the look of this place, and what´s with that fancy car over there.
Valykrie Tank: *I am not a car*.
Lance: Get out of the way nooblets, this area has been quarantined. Well, your lives are forfeit either way now that you´ve seen me. The earth must be purged of all infidels.
Matt: Huh, have we met before? So what´s your plan now, just trying to kill everything?
Lance: It sickens me to see things the way they are. Only by destroying everything can the world be rebuilt. G´ fahahaha.

Matt: I don´t like that sort of stuff!!! Gonna have to smash up your tank, bro.

  • While in the desert at the third game, Natz complains that she'd prefer the snowy terrain that this heat:

Lance: Take your top off!

Natz: What??!?

Lance: Who said that? Wasn't me.