Fontes' Rants

Everything About Fiction You Never Wanted to Know.

Fontes' Rants is a webcomic which primarily illustrates things the author (Fontes) finds strange, funny, stupid, or downright infuriating in popular works of anime, comic books and video games, and even things he finds on Deviant ART. It also has cheap laughs from time to time.

Recurring original characters include Fontes himself, an unnamed fangirl, Tanooki the raccoon, Fontes' friend Steven Worker, and Takeshi, Fontes' "son" by the Life Note.

Tropes used in Fontes' Rants include:


Spider-Man: 'Tha hell? Did ya took the elevator, or something?!
Ezio: Silenzio, ragno! You now owe me fifty dollars.

  • Breaking the Fourth Wall: Occasionally, but one comic was just Fontes looking at the reader, pointing down, saying "keep scrolling down". Turns out, he actually puts a rant under most of the comics, and apparently not many noticed.
  • Combat Pragmatist: In one of Fontes' many Final Fantasy parodies. On the left, a Black Mage. On the right, a White Mage and a Fighter. The black mage starts to cast Firaga, when the white mage unloads a shotgun into his face.

Fighter: Ehm... dude, it was his turn.
Fontes: I don't fuckin' care!!!

Hitmonchan uses "Falcon Punch"!
Hitmonlee uses "Roundhouse Kick"!

Fontes: ...I really shouldn't have made him able to summon firearms...

Fontes: ...I really hate him for leaving Charizard behind!

Luma: Oh, yeah, gimme those starbits! I can't hold it any longer!!!

Mook: Stop at once!
Naruto: Hell no! Bahleeeve it!
Nearby "Box": *sigh* ...Rookies...

Bridget: You look like a queer, ya know?

Sora: What?! What's so funny?!
Fontes: Just look at that thing!!!
Sora: ...? ...Aww, fuck you, Square!!!