Forbiden Fruit: The Tempation Of Edward Cullen/Funny

Everything About Fiction You Never Wanted to Know.


  • "'OMG, how is this possible?' i said 'Don't ask me I'm just a panda, lol' said Snoofles with a big grin"
  • "My knee came up hard against his massive throbbing gigglestick between his legs"
    • Actually, make that the entire fight scene, which has wonderful events such as:
    • Edward punching the wall with 'his buckly fist'
    • Attacks like 'I schlepped him hard across the face'
    • Edward catching her 'waste' (seems quite unsanitary)
    • Edward somehow managing to "ham" the main character against a wall
    • Edward's face 'was blunt and right heavy in mine'
    • The aforementioned gigglestick
    • Edward's reaction to receiving a Groin Attack: 'he drubbed over in pan'
  • I broke free and goaded my books and started rugging away to math, but edward hand finished with me.
  • "WTF you freaky goth tudor bitch!" she shouted with her ugly face flapping like a big bag
  • "omg my sweet lady" he cried! "what has this frightful asshole been doing to thee?"
  • He was smilling in a proper creepy way and looked totaly weird like a greasy frog thing and his male genital item was not nice like edwards it was like a horible wet mushroom.
  • For some reason when Jacob is yelling at Tia for being a "HALF-BREAD! HALF-BREAD!" I burst into a hysterical mess.
  • Forbiden Fruit: The Tempation Of Edward Cullen is practically a Crowning Moment Of Funny in itself. As for individual moments:
    • Pretty much everything to do with the panda.
    • "stop raping me!!"
    • "HALF-BREAD! HALF-BREAD! HALF-BREAD!" (Once would have been funny, but when the same misspelling is repeated three times in a row ...)
    • A direct quote from a troper, directly after a gigglestick mention:
      • Actually, make that the entire fight scene, which has wonderful events such as Edward punching the wall with 'his buckly fist', attacks like 'I schlepped him hard across the face', Edward catching her 'waste' (highly unsanitary, honestly), Edward somehow managing to ham her 'he caught my hand in mid air and hammed me against the wall', Edward's face becoming blunt 'His face was blunt and right heavy in mine', the aforementioned gigglestick, Edward's reaction to this blatant Groin Attack 'he drubbed over in pan' and the final sentence: 'I broke free and goaded my books and started rugging away to math, but edward hand finished with me.'
    • Also, mancarrots.
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