Heal Thyself/Quotes

Everything About Fiction You Never Wanted to Know.


Congratulations on finding this fortuitously placed Medkit! We here at "Heal-U-Kwik" Industries have a simple philosophy: Manufacture the finest Medkits money can buy and then scatter them around dangerous areas of war-torn cities to be found and used by injured adventurers at no actual cost to themselves!
Instructions for use: Simply touch, pick up, or walk over Medkit. Doing so will heal most types of injuries, including bullet wounds, zombie slashes, antlion gouges, grenade shrapnel, and even self-inflicted damage caused by careless falls off ledges and catwalks (Note: falls from large bridges can be fatal!) Our patented technology will even remove pesky bloodstains from your clothing and body... instantly!
Talk to your doctor before using Medkit. Side-effects may include blurred vision and inflated sense of invulnerability. This Medkit is also Eco-Friendly and will completely and instantly biodegrade upon use.

The fine print on a Medkit in Concerned

Video game healing is never going to be realistic. There is no way to instantly recover from a broken limb or a ruptured spleen. The challenge is to find an alternative to the cop out medkit filled with magical healing fairy dust.

Ben "Yahtzee" Croshaw discussing healing showers on 1213's commentary track

First aid kits can be applied to your injuries in under a second, and will instantly fix your injuries and make you healthier.

Stepping on a first aid kit would have about the same effect as sitting on a doctor.


Back to Heal Thyself