Homestar Runner/Funny

Everything About Fiction You Never Wanted to Know.


Homestar Runner: Oh, hewwo. Welcome to homestarrunner.net!
Director: It's "dot com".
Homestar Runner: Oh, wight. Homestarrunner.net--it's dot com!

Homestar: Okay, this time I'm totally gonna get it. Seriously you guys.
Director: ...go ahead, we're rolling.
Homestar: Oh! I am Homestar, and This is A Website!

  • In "The House That Gave Sucky Treats":

The King of Town: (dressed as Hagar the Horrible) Trick-Or-Treat! I'm horrible!
Strong Bad: You got that right!

Strongbad: What? You're not Ali. You're not even literate.

Senor Cardgage: I'm sorry, Bridget, but can I steep some identificaption?

  • You're going have to share a bathroom with some kid from Alabama that kinda sucks, ect.
  • Johnny's Jimmy's "Lacrosse Tourment" The YouTube Easter Egg is also halerious too.
  • Virus = Very Yes
    • That entire Sbemail. "I CAN'T SPELL YOU"
    • "And the Compy...just peed the carpet."
    • "It's in a better place! Rather, it's in the same place, only now it's got a big hole in it!"
  • The ENTIRETY of the "Animal" Sbemail.
    • Da Huuuudge! "Ew! No! No Huuuuudge!"
    • "I say there, monstrosity, do you know the times?" Followed by Monstrosity-Strong Bad gurgling incoherently.
      • Strong Bad realizing that he couldn't talk with a probosicis...not that he'd have much of an answer for "Do you know the times?"
    • "Uh....The Pardack? WHAT THE!? Why do these keep coming out as nasty blob things!?"
  • Any time Strong Bad edits a children's book. "Some people have curly hair. Hilary has Curly Hair" becomes

Some people are being fangoriously devoured by gelatinous monsters. Hilary's legs are being digested.

  • I CAN STOP SHOWERING!
  • The climax of the Sbemail do over, where Strong Bad repeatedly smashes Homestar dressed as The Cheat with his keyboard, and Strong Mad thinks it’s actually The Cheat.

Strong Mad: DON'T HURT THE CHEAT!!!
Strong Bad: No, big guy, that's not The Cheat. That's Homestar! From school!
Homestar: Meedley mee! I'm The Cheat! I'm not from school! Moooooo!
Strong Bad: Uh, The Cheat's not a cow, you know... Whoa!
Strong Mad: THE CHEAT IS SO A COW!!!
Strong Bad: Strong Mad! Put me down! You're making a terrible stnank!
Homestar: It makes me all jangly inside!

  • Strong Bad explaining why Strong Mad doesn't have his own series of cartoon shorts in "The Facts".

Strong Bad: Hey, Strong Mad! What's, uh, what's my favorite movie?
Strong Mad: GARBLEDINA!
Strong Bad: (Typing on a keyboard) Fact #2: "Garbledina".

    • "He's like a big square, this guy! I'm not sure what this has to do with him not having his own cartoon...But, it's just weird is all. Unsettling."
      • "I guess if he lived in Cubeland, it'd work. But...since Cubeland is place I just made up, on to fact #4."
    • "Have you seen his computer!" (Cut to Strong Mad's "Computer", which turns out to be nothing but a cardboard box with a crudely drawn picture of a computer on it.)
    • Doug the Dino.
  • The whole "Mini Golf" Strong Bad e-mail.
    • "And, yes, it's every bit as messed up as the cartoon on which it's based."
    • Coach Z at "the 18th hole", which "puts a unique twist on the standard bottomless-hole-that-sucks-your-golf-ball-away-forever hole":

'Coach Z: (putts his ball into the hole, causing it to drop down from above and land in front of him) Oh, I guess I forgort to port... (tries again, same result) Oh, I guess I forgat to prat! (cycle repeats) Oh! Gorka-fa-pork!
Strong Bad: This will go on forever if you let it.

    • Strong Bad talking about the "blue water" hole and how kids tend to drink out of it or pee in it...or, worse, both.

Homestar: I'm checkin' out all the exotic mawine life down hewe.
Strong Bad: What marine life? All that's down there are a bunch of cigarette butts!
Homestar: (Holds up a bra) And a bwa!

Strong Bad: Sweet!

  • The e-mail "Your Funeral," when Strong Bad's pre-recorded eulogy plays, but Coach Z tapes over it accidentally with one of his raps. While the rap is playing, Bubs stares angrily at a deeply ashamed Coach Z, who can't stop dancing to the beat.
    • And then Homestar tears up while doing a reading from "the book of Phones".
  • "montage", which features:

Let's make this moment be the symbol of our lives
We'll pawn your dad's computer
And gonna sail to paradise

Homestar sold his "The #1" shirt for $3(US). He got a good deal.
Strong Bad went on to host some show on Animal Planet. It was canceled before the first commercial break.

  • All the weirdness that goes on in "virus" when Strong Bad's computer gets infected, from the error message ("'Computer over'? 'Virus equals very yes'? That's not a good prize!") onward.
  • Pretty much all of the Halloween Costume Commentaries, but especially Strong Bad's song during the montage of bad Homestar costumes in the 2009 edition.

Oh, a red t-shirt and taped-on star
Has anybody told you how terrible you are?
Some white face-paint, or maybe none at all
Just standin' around in your front hall!

    • Strong Bad's reaction to a rather poorly-done Trogdor costume.
      • "I said "S and more different S" NOT "Seven and more different crescent wrench"! And is that limp pantyhose worm supposed to be a beefy arm!?"
    • This exchange-

Strong Bad: (Looking at a guy in a Homestar costume next to a guy in a Mario costume.) Wait a minute, Homestar, did you eat Luigi?
Homestar: Yes, Strong Bad, I ate Luigi. He tasted like mushrooms!

  • The dueling fanfiction by Strong Sad and Strong Bad in sbemail #188. The fact that they pronounce Twizzlers with an exaggerated accent ("Twizzlérs") just makes the fanfic even funnier.
    • "And then Homestar traipsed in naked as a jaybird!"
  • Homestar and Strong Bad's cardboard box submarine from Date Nite.
  • Before they were disoncontinued in 2008, if you bought something from the store, you were given a thank-you message from one of the characters. They were also time-oriented, so depending on what time of day something was bought, you'd get a message that corresponded. If you bought something from midnight to 5 AM, Homestar would come out in his pajamas and say...

"(yawn) Oh...hi there. We appreciate you buying stuff from us and everything, but um...(yawn)...you should really get to bed."

  • It's the loading screen! It's the loading screen! I can't believe this cartoon is just all the loading screens!
  • The entire email "for kids," especially Strong Bad's meltdown when the kids can't find the barely-hidden The Cheat.

"Look, The Cheat is behind the freaking box! He's behind the box! I'LL KILL YA! I'LL KILL ALL YOUR DOGS!!"

    • Homsar's kids' show is probably not too far off from some of today's kids' shows.
  • This vicious taking apart of one of Strong Bad's emailers:

Strong Bad: "Guess what? Nobody calls you Coolio Da Fabio, aka, Quit Makin' Up Nicknames For Yourself! I'm just gonna call you "Dealin' Burgers", which I assume doubles as an accurate job description."

  • The aptly-named sbemail funny.
  • The sbemail "caffeine," where Strong Sad has become (and stays) completely hyperactive due to drinking orange juice laced with Sanka, especially when he beats up Coach Z.
  • The e-mail stunt double in which Strong Bad is asked if he ever uses a stunt double. He shows footage from Dangeresque 2: This Time It's Not Dangeresque 1 in an attempt to persuade us that "The stunts I do are so... done by me." Needless to say, his stunt double - Strong Sad - is painfully obvious.
  • City (Comma) State. That is all.
  • From "Where's The Cheat?":

Homsar: Whuaaaaaa, oh no! You shanked my Jenga ship!
Strong Sad: I shanked your Jenga ship? We're playing Connect Four.
Bubs: Hey you guys! Where The Cheat is at?
Strong Sad: Oh, I don't know. It's just us two.
Homsar: Uh, hey, Tubs! I just lost my Jenga Jam!
Bubs: Don't you talk to me. (walks off)

Strong Bad: My The Cheat wants to know what your crappy toy is this week.
Drive-Thru Whale: It's brown.

  • Coach Z dressed as Drive-Thru Whale in Blubb-O's Commercial:

Coach Z': Hey dere, kids! I'm the Drive-Thru Whale! I'LL CHOP OFF YOUR LEGS!!!
Strong Sad: Sometimes it seems like you're trying to go to prison, Coach Z.
Coach Z: Hey, three square meals a day!

Strong Bad: Uhh, why does this feel... weird?
Homestar: What are you talking about? We stand around in the snow in Decemberween costumes every year. It's our thing. It's what we do.
Strong Bad: Are you sure? I think we may have gotten our... weens crossed...

Strong Sad: Can you please never say that again~?!

Homestar: Bubs, are you some kind of unethical quack?
Bubs: The most quackin'-est!

    • "That was a great skillet-nap!"
  • When Homestar regrets a message he sent to Marzipan's Answering Machine, he tries to get rid of it by saying it backwards.[1] When Pom Pom "tells" him this doesn't work, Homestar replaces the tape with one containing fake messages. Needless to say, the impression he does of Marzipan, Strong Bad, Coach Z, himself, and Strong Sad are hillariously terrible.
  1. don't bother trying to play it forwards, though: it's gibberish either way