Legend of Zelda the Abridged Series/Funny

Everything About Fiction You Never Wanted to Know.


Adamwestslapdog's series

  • How Link got captured:

Link: Oh man! What they throw me in prison for?
Navi: Well gee. I wonder...

//seconds earlier//

Link: Ladies, say hello to Mr. Penis!

Link: Oh, come on! That's just how guys say hello.

Navi: No, it isn't. That's how crazy people say "Please arrest me."

Ganondorf: You see, the crime rate in Hyrule has gotten so low that the king is going to have to let some of his guards go. So, in order to improve the economy, I have become...a criminal!
Link: Let me get this straight...you're being evil...to be nice?
Ganondorf: Yes!

Link(singing to the tune): I got a sword! I got a rupee! I got another rupee! I got a shield! I got a stick!
Navi: Okay, that DOES IT! IT'S A STICK! NO ONE GETS THAT EXCITED OVER A STICK! The sword I can understand, and maybe the shield, BUT IT'S A STICK! If you do that one more time, I'm going to kick you in the kidneys until you pee blood, then I'm going to stick your face in it and make you drink it!
[later]
Mido: ...from now on, we're enemies.
Link(singing to the tune again): I made an enemy!
[sounds of kicking and grunts of pain] //trust me you really dont want to see this//
Link: Aah! My kidneys!

    • After the opening credits, Link pointed out that it tasted like Raspberryade.

Xanauzumaki's series

  • Pretty much the enteirity of Ep. 15 (Zant's Episode) of his TP Abridged.
  • "I'll do anything for your penis my lord"
    • "Yeah, please don't say that"
  • Anything Navi says.

TheBigT2000's series

  • NOW YOU LISTEN TO ME, YOU SON OF A BITCH!!! I DID NOT COME ALL THIS WAY LISTENING TO THIS ASS, TO HAVE YOU TURN US DOWN AT A SECOND NOTICE!!! WERE GETTING THAT STONE AND IF YOU DON"T LIKE IT, YOU CAN SHOVE IT UP YOUR ASS!!! AND THEN WE"LL TAKE IT AFTER WE MAKE YOU CLEAN IT OFF!!! *Beat* GOD DAMN IT!!!
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