One Crazy Summer/Characters

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Hoops Mc Cann

Played by John Cusack

• Ironic Nickname: Hoops sucks at basketball
• Cool Shades
• Closer to Earth
• The Team Normal
• The Generic Guy
• High Hopes, Zero Talent

George Calamari

Played by Joel Murrey

• Cool Loser
• Fat Idiot

Ack-Ack Raymond

AKA Acky. Played by Curtis Armstrong

• Father, I Don't Want to Fight: Acky's dad wants him to be a marine, but Acky's really not the right guy for the job.
• Man Child: Acky has the mannerisms of a four year old, a permanent wide-eyed expression and cannot stand to see wrecked dolls.
• Ambiguously Gay: At least everyone on the DVD commentary seems to think so. Although fans tend to see him more as Asexual.
• Berserk Button: Let's just say Ted was pretty damn lucky the guys where there to hold Acky back when he cut the tongue out of that Odie doll.
• Can't Spit It Out: He couldn't tell his dad he didn't want to be a marine, and when he did, he was kicked out of the house.
• Break the Cutie
• Children Are Innocent

Cassandra Eldridge

Played by Demi Moore

• Betty and Veronica: Betty to Cookie's Veronica
• Granola Girl

Egg Stork

Played by Bobcat Goldthwait

• Non-Identical Twins
• Berserk Button: Don't hit his brother, he just might cut up your car with a chain saw.
• Break the Cutie
• Took a Level in Badass

Clay Stork

Played by Tom Villard

• Non-Identical Twins
• Break the Cutie
• Children Are Innocent

Squid Calamari

• Berserk Button: Don't call her dog ugly.
• Ugly Cute: Her dog.
• Fiery Redhead
• The Cutie
• Tagalong Kid
• Break the Cutie

Cookie Campbell

• Betty and Veronica: Veronica to Cassandra's Betty.
• Blondes Are Evil
• High Heel Face Turn

Ted Beckerstead

• Berserk Button: YOU TOUCHED MY CAR!!!
• Blondes Are Evil
• Jerk Jock
• Vanity Licence Plate

Mr. Beckerstead

• The Big Bad

Old Man Beckerstead

• Cool Old Guy

Grandma Calamari

• Granny Classic