Red Dwarf/Awesome

Everything About Fiction You Never Wanted to Know.


  • Kryten's debut episode. The kind but obsessed neat-freak robot is found still tending to a crew that has been dead for three million years because he has no other purpose. Rimmer immediately puts him to task performing endless menial tasks. Lister tries to get him to stop acting like a slave and think for himself, but to no avail. At the end, he is painting a portrait of Rimmer while he gloats to Lister... whereupon Kryten reveals that he has been painting a portrait of Rimmer on a toilet. Kryten proceeds to insult Rimmer, flip him off and leave on Lister's space bike.

Rimmer: What are you doing?
Kryten: I, um, I think I'm... I'm rebelling.
Rimmer: Rebelling?
Kryten: I, I, I... I think that's what I'm doing.
Rimmer: You are rebelling.
Kryten: Yes.
Rimmer: What are you rebelling against?!
Kryten: Whaddaya got?

  • Rimmer, of all characters, has had a few:
    • His speech to The Inquisitor, which can basically be summed up as "Yeah, I'm a waste of space, but look what I had to work with." It works.
    • In "Out of Time":

Rimmer: Have we got any chance of winning?
Kryten: Their craft is greatly upgraded. We have no chance whatsoever.
Rimmer: ...Then I say fight.

Kryten: ...Mr Rimmer?

Rimmer: Better dead than smeg!

      • And Rimmer being the only person left, and deciding to be heroic and attempting to destroy the time drive. It's ambiguous if he does or not before their Starbug is blown up, but they survive anyway.
    • Deciding to become the new Ace Rimmer in season seven.
      • With the completely awesome reveal that enough Rimmers have become Ace for a time that in one dimension there is a Saturn-like planet with rings made up entirely of their remains.
    • Using a Groin Attack on the Grim Reaper in the final episode.
      • Followed by the credits:

the end?
THE SMEG IT IS!

    • 'He's Arnold, Arnold, Arnold Rimmer, more reliable than a garden strimmer...'
    • In The Last Human Rimmer goes toe to toe with the Big Bad in a PAINT STRIPPER and lives up to the expectations of his illegitimate son, a rough and tumble space marine which frees him from his many neuroses and allows him to become a hero of Ace Rimmer proportions... and is then shot in the light bee. Somehow he survives and performs a Heroic Sacrifice to defeat The Rage and allow his friends to reach shelter. The ending implies that this act allows Lister and Kochanski to rebuild the human race.
    • In Back to Earth, when he kills Katerina by pushing her in front of a car, just after she explains why killing holograms is okay to justify her killing him. Complete subversion when you consider that he's usually the one whose attempts to quote weird regulations are thwarted by someone more knowledgeable.
  • Lister's final confrontation with The Inquisitor.
  • The Cat justifying his existence to the inquisitor:

Cat: I have given pleasure to the world because I have such a beautiful ass.
Inquisitor: Some might say that's a pretty shallow argument.
Cat: Some might say I'm a pretty shallow guy. But a shallow guy with a great ass!

    • And it works.
  • Hell, every character's confrontation with the Inquisitor. Here's Kryten's, which unfortunately doesn't work:

Inquisitor: Well Kryten, justify yourself.
KRYTEN: I'm not sure I can.
Inquisitor: But surely your life is replete with good works. There can be few individuals who have lived a more selfless life.
Kryten: But I am programmed to live unselfishly. And therefore, any good works I do come not out of fine motives but as a result of a series of binary commands I am compelled to obey.
Inquisitor: Well then, how can any mechanical justify himself?
Kryten: Perhaps only if he attempted to break his programming and conduct his life according to a set of values he arrived at independently.
Inquisitor: Your argument invites deletion.
Kryten: The rules are yours, not mine.
Inquisitor: Do you wish to be erased?
Kryten: Well, I am programmed not to wish for anything. I serve.
Inquisitor: In a human, this behavior might be considered stubb-orn.
Kryten: But I am not human, and neither are you. And it is not our place to judge them. I wonder why you do?
Inquisitor: Enough.

    • And Lister's minimalist reponse:

Inquisitor: You've got brains, man, brains you never used.
Lister: Spin on it.

  • In one appearance, Ace Rimmer escapes a death trap, surfs a crocodile from a plane while shooting Nazis, gets shot and only complains because "This was my best top, dammit!", saves the Damsel in Distress, escapes on a motorbike while shooting more Nazis and has sex with said Distressed Damsel before seeking first aid. What a guy.
  • "White Hole", where Lister plays interplanetary pool (that is pool with planets) and successfully pulls off a trick shot.
  • The end of "Gunmen of the Apocalypse". The crew finally reach the cockpit moments before crashing into a lava moon. Desperate attempts to pull away lead to them crashing into the lava. A few moments pass..."YEE HAAAAAW!" They emerge again, and fly away (segueing into to a special Western version of the Theme Song, at that).
    • "Gunmen" gets a few of these. The bit where Lister defends the drunken Sheriff Kryten using Brett Riverboat's knife skills (particularly the apple) and "The Riviera Kid"'s trick shot to prevent Kryten from escaping town both spring to mind.
  • Holly teaching the others a lesson about appreciating him more by making them think he's been replaced with a by-the-book drill sergeant of a computer AI who makes them work for every bit of food.

Holly: We are talking jape of the decade. We are talking April, May, June, July and August Fool [...] The moral of the story is, appreciate what you've got because, basically, I'm fantastic.

Kryten: I knew something he didn't.
Lister: What?
Kryten: I knew I was lying. No Silicon Heaven? Preposterous! Why where would all the calculators go?

  • Kryten again, in Beyond a Joke when the rest of the crew prioritise a VR version of Pride and Prejudice over Kryten's elaborate anniversary meal. After attempting to assassinate the game characters with mixed success, he imports a tank from a World War 2 game. 'Supper... is... ready!' BOOM! (just to mention, yes that is the tank that James Bond drove in Goldeneye)
  • Lister's scene in Holoship, where one of the genius holograms scouts Starbug. After being insulted, Lister proceeds to start mocking the guy and then threatens him for being a stuck up jackass. When the hologram reminds him he can't be hurt, Lister mentions they have a holowhip, and starts looking more and more deranged, eventually eating his cigarette as he squares up. The hologram flees. (The cigarette part wasn't scripted. To this day, actor Craig Charles admits he has no idea as to why he ate the cigarette.)
  • Kochanski tricking Epideme into leaving Lister's body.
  • Cat's dance number with the Blue Midget shuttles. Utterly pimp.
  • Kryten beating Legion, by knocking out the others so the entity couldn't use their minds against them, leaving only himself, which left him harmless and compelled to help the others.
  • Rimmer kicks Death in the nads.

Rimmer: Not today, matey! (Groin Attack) Remember, only the good die young! (runs)
Death: That's...never happened before.


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