Roll to Roll To Dodge/Funny

Everything About Fiction You Never Wanted to Know.


  • Derm's use of water magic on The Borealis causes the hull to completely dry out, then abruptly make the density of water turn to gas levels. *Splash*
    • Two turns later, on a new ship, Derm causes a massive Whirlpool and almost sinks it. Again.
    • Once they reach land, Derm fires off four 'Violent Atrocities' in rapid succession: Exploding a seagull for stealing his new pet kitten which nails the dockmaster in the eye with shrapnel, Boiling a regiment of guards inside their own armor, Fusing together HighEndNoob, Urist, and a swordfish, and then making a giant ball of pulsating flesh. Which then explodes.
    • The other players in-game reaction when he sets the entire elven forest retreat on fire.
      • Also when he teleports to the top of the tree to face the boss (A unicorn)... Fusing the boss with his gigantic elephant rat in the process.
    • The GM's reaction when he completely obliterates the top floor of a Goblin tower that contained plot important friendly NPC's.
      • "OH GOD OH WHY DERM JESUS WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU"
    • His increasingly desperate attempts to keep hold of the necronomicon, ignoring his recently Portal Cut hand and a horde of zombies.
    • At one point, he gives the command "Yell at Urist that I swaer[1] to god if he does not heal me I will encase him in granite." He rolls a 6, and actually encases Urist in granite. "Huh. You didn't even know you could do that."
  • Frelock hypnotizes an entire navy platoon into thinking that they are fish.
  • Urist goes into a Martial Trance, karate chops off the already halfway dead Frelocks legs, simultaneously cauterizing the stumps, chains them together, and uses them as nun-chucks.
    • Frelock: щ(ﾟДﾟщ)
  • The players 'Currently' tab in their statuses are frequent sources of amusement.
    • Derm: Currently: Committing violent atrocities. AGAIN.
    • John Freeman: Currently: DOOMING US ALL (Turn 98)
  • Turn 104. Previously, Frelock turned the holodeck difficulty Up to Eleven and the stagehands sprout wings of stretched skin and breath fire. Solution? Get drunk and sing at them. It works. Kinda.
  1. ↑ sic
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