Sex Sells/Quotes

"I'm a beautiful, scantily-clad model standing in Times Square posing for this ad. Typical of Madison Avenue, they'll use sex to try and sell anything! Even something as wholesome as milk. Only one problem. Most readers are so busy checking out my fabulous body that they never really pay attention to the product being advertised."

—Ad parody, back cover of Mad Magazine #384

Oh, look at that! Those two people like it. And they're shagging...

—Eddie Izzard, on modern advertising techniques.

Dr. Diddy: Let me explain something to you, all right? We got to get her half-naked and put her up front center stage. That's gonna make you all billionaires, because America loves hot white jailbait ass.
Peter: Wait a minute.... (deadpan) That's the smartest thing I've ever heard anyone say about anything.

—Family Guy

Peggy Olson: Sex sells.
Don Draper: Says who? Just so you know, the people who talk that way think that monkeys can do this.

—Mad Men

Males are predictable creatures. That makes it easy to craft a marketing message that appeals to them. All successful advertising campaigns that target men include one of these two messages:

This product will help you get dates with bikini models.
This product will save you time and money, which you need if you want to date bikini models.

Compared to simpleminded, brutish men, women are much more intricate and complex. Your advertising message must appeal to women's greater range of intellectual interests and aesthetic preferences. Specifically, your message has to say this:

If you use this product you'll be a bikini model.

—Scott Adams, The Dilbert Principle

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