Spanner in the Works/Quotes

Everything About Fiction You Never Wanted to Know.


"What happens to your prophecy if I shoot you first?"
Dan Smith, Killer7
"Reality and human nature, sir, are very important things, and oh how they sometimes bring down the most perspicacious calculations!"
Porfiry Petrovich, Crime and Punishment
"Congratulations. You've just invented negligent regicide."
Ennesby, Schlock Mercenary. He got better.

"Aboyne (vb.)

To beat an expert at a game of skill by playing so appallingly that none of his clever tactics or strategies are of any use to him."
To be fair, it was a great plan until it involved Fighter.
"There's one thing you never put in a trap if you're smart. If you value your continued existence, if you have any plans about seeing tomorrow there's one thing you never ever put in a trap: Me."
The Eleventh Doctor, Doctor Who, "The Time of Angels"
"My plan was perfect but there was one thing I overlooked, one factor I failed to calculate. He's a dumbass and there's no accounting for dumbass-ness."
Agito Wanijima, Air Gear
"Rufus, this is a precision instrument, incredibly complex. Better mess with everything."
Ron Stoppable, Kim Possible
"You always overthink things. The reason your plans keep failing is not because your enemies are geniuses. It's because they are idiots. A plan is only truly foolproof if you consider The Fool. Oh, and checkmate."
"That little goon! Even a chimp knows better than to pick the losing side! This ruins my plan to wrap the Game up on Day 1! I'll need to work up another strategy... adjust for the longer term. Good thing I never make mistakes..."
Mitsuki Konishi, The World Ends With You, after learning that Beat made a pact with Neku
"Hey, I totally just gummed up your subplot. Now let me gloat about it in front of you so you can easily fix it."

"Boris, I thought you said this plan was foolproof."

"Foolproof yes, idiotproof, no."
Natasha and Boris, Rocky and Bullwinkle.
"I'm here to screw up your plan."
Hidari Shotaro, explaining what he is doing in the Big Bad's lair.
"The best swordsman in the world doesn't need to fear the second best swordsman in the world; no, the person for him to be afraid of is some ignorant antagonist who has never had a sword in his hand before; he doesn't know the thing he ought to do, and so the expert isn't prepared for him; he does the thing he ought not to do, and often it catches the expert out and ends him on the spot."
"While I was trying to bring back Sora, I had so many plans in store, but once Sora was an acting force, they fell apart. All my research amounted to nothing, compared with that one boy's heart."
—'Diz/Ansem The Wise, Kingdom Hearts II
"The right man in the wrong place can make all the difference... in the world."
The G-Man, Half-Life 2
"You know, when you said 'Noel Vermillion' a few moments ago, I damn near peed myself. All of my plans - POOF! instantly undone. All thanks to you."
Hazama, BlazBlue: Continuum Shift : Slight Hope, to Makoto Nanaya on why he has to kill her now
"Did I throw a 'wrench' into your plans? Hahahaha."
The Spy, Team Fortress 2

For those of you who don't appreciate what Trump is doing and think 'evidence' is relevant for a win, I want you to imagine being Chris Mathews.
You show up to work Monday. Your team was emailing all last week on this weeks narrative. They have the sound bites lined up, the footage, the pundits are already gathering in the lobby.
You've got your narrative. You're going to lay into Trump and let him have it good. The cross-hairs at on him and you are gonna hammer him all we-
Your assistant runs up and shows you her phone with Trumps Twitter account:
"Pelosi caught in 3-way with Elvis. Aliens claim evidence Schumer is a Martian! Scary!"
You know its bullshit.
Trump knows its bullshit.
You know that Trump knows you know its bullshit.
You know the public knows its bullshit and doesn't care.
Your team, mouths agape, looks at you for a clue. Your assistant lets her hand drop as she watches your face turn from white to red to purple until you explode-
"GODDAMMIT HE DID IT AGAIN! HE CANT DO THIS!
HE CANT TELL US WHAT TO REPORT! WE ARE THE MEDIA, GODDAMMIT! WE RUN THIS TOWN!
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!!!"