Spoof Aesop/Quotes
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"Remember, kids, exercise is hard, but shoving a spoon down your throat is easy! And don't forget to do it after every meal, just like me!"
—Sailor Moon Abridged, Episode 1
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"When I look good, I feel good, too! And the only way I feel good is by vomiting. The only drawback is the stomach acid making my breath smell rank as hell. So I always brush my teeth after every throw up session. Take it from me, kids! A skinny bod means nothing if your breath smells like a dead horse and hot garbage! Sailor Moon says!" (giggle)
—Sailor Moon Abridged, Episode 32
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Tom Servo: What do you think the lesson of the movie was? |
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"And the Real Lesson? Don't leave things in the Fridge."
—Spike Spiegel, Cowboy Bebop
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"The moral of World War I is 'Never assassinate Archduke Ferdinand'."
—Lemony Snicket, A Series of Unfortunate Events
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"It's not the beard on the outside that counts, it's the beard on the inside."
—Action Hank, Dexter's Laboratory
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Yugi: Don't you get it, Tristan? This is Joey's coming-of-age episode, where he proves he's a real man by winning a children's card game all by himself. |
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"We've learned that card games are the answer to all life's problems. And the only thing I know for certain in this world is that there's a strange man living inside my head who tells me to do things."
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"Givin' kids charity just makes 'em weak, man. Teach a kid to fish, he can eat fish his whole life. Teach a kid NOT to fish, he starves to death. Where I come from that's murder, Homes."
—Dusty, Left 4 Dead 2
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"This is exactly why babies should not be allowed to dual-wield flintlock pistols." |
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"Wheel of Morality, turn turn turn, tell us the lesson that we should learn."
—Yakko Warner, Animaniacs
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Jake: Let's never be stupid again. |
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"Never forget the teachings of those you shoot in the head after they become zombies."
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Vicken: Well I think we learned an important lesson today about online safety. |
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Chan: You suppose there's a moral in all of this? —Hsu and Chan, "Evening of Destruction"
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"Dear Princess Celestia, I wanted to share my thoughts with you. Ahem.... I didn't learn anything! I was right all along!" *happily trots across the screen*
—Applejack, My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic
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" 'Stay away from good-looking women when you're fighting. Otherwise you'll get hit with diarrhea.' One of the few things I learned from Shadow Moses."
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During a cold winter, one little sparrow was freezing, got all numb and fell into the snow, about to die. —an old Russian joke, with some song adaptations
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Got hole inside your heart? —Santa, The Stockholms
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