Stan Helsing

Everything About Fiction You Never Wanted to Know.

2009 horror movie spoof from one of the executive producers of Scary Movie. Not made by Seltzer and Friedberg, but with a somewhat similar style, if slightly (slightly) higher quality. Was released straight to video.

Stan Helsing parodies Van Helsing, A Nightmare on Elm Street, The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, Friday the 13 th, Childs Play and Hellraiser (but not Dracula or any other vampire film oddly enough). The villains of these movies (except Van Helsing) are planning to kill the last descendant/reincarnation of the original Van Helsing and lure him and his friends out to a deserted movie studio lot to do it on Halloween.

It's mostly pretty bad, but there a few redeeming features: a Leslie Nielsen cameo and Desi Lydic's endearingly ditzy performance as Mia, which belongs in a better movie.

Tropes used in Stan Helsing include:
  • Actually Pretty Funny: While it would be a stretch to say the movie is good, it really does have its moments.
  • Brainless Beauty: Mia.
  • Brainy Brunette: Nadine. Well, brainy compared to the blonde anyway.
  • Brick Joke: The giant cockroach in the restroom.
  • A Date with Rosie Palms: "Chief Spanks-a-lot" does this while watching Stan use the gas station bathroom through a peephole.
  • Dumb Blonde: Mia.
  • Genre Savvy: Stan. Justified by the fact he's a video store clerk (who even namechecks several movies while lampshading some of the film cliches) so he does reasonably possess a passing knowledge of all the (parodied) movie tropes the film consists of.
  • Girl-On-Girl Is Hot
  • In One Ear, Out the Other: After Mia does something even dumber than usual Stan blows in her ear. Cue the sound of wind whistling through an empty space and Mia looking around nervously for whatever caused the noise.

Mia: Do you guys hear that?

  • Lesbian Vampire: Parodied.
  • Monster Mash: Curiously composed entirely of psychos from slasher films rather than classic movie monsters.
  • Ms. Fanservice: Every good-looking female character, but especially Mia, who wears both a Roman Catholic schoolgirl uniform and a nurse costume.
    • Don't forget she starts out as a cheerleader. And at one point in the movie when Stan (accidently) ends up looking up her skirt he actually suggests the camera switchs to a POV shot.
  • Narrow Parody
  • Poor Man's Substitute: Steve Howey (Stan) and Diora Baird (Nadine) are dead ringers for Ashton Kutcher and Rachel Bilson, respectively. Desi Lydic (Mia) looks less like Christina Applegate, but does an uncanny impression of her voice.
  • Stealth Pun: Stan Helsing insists his name is not Van. The actor who plays Stan had a supporting role in the sitcom Reba, where he played... a guy named Van. Some people argue this is too funny to be a coincidence. Others argue that it's too smart to be intentional.
  • The Cameo: A cross-dressing Leslie Nielsen!
  • The Slacker: Stan.
  • Too Soon: This was probably one of the last films made before Michael Jackson died and we get a brief Scary Movie style tasteless joke.