Stop Poking Me

Everything About Fiction You Never Wanted to Know.
"Do that again and you'll pull back a stump."
Alleria Windrunner, Warcraft II: Beyond the Dark Portal

Pointing at people is rude. So is poking them. So is poking them repeatedly for no reason when you already have their attention. Will you please quit doing that already?! Sheesh, what's wrong with you, anyway?

In games that have units vocally acknowledge when you select them, clicking too often can make them annoyed/sarcastic. Originated with Warcraft: Orcs And Humans (the Trope Maker and Trope Namer) and became a standard feature of all Blizzard Entertainment's games, and has since spread to other companies.

Nowadays it is almost considered a mandatory feature for any Real Time Strategy game.

Breaking the Fourth Wall is optional, but usually adds to the fun.

See Adventure Narrator Syndrome for a Point and Click Game variant where the characters may get annoyed if you ask them to use two items together that don't work. For more general examples not related to multiple clicks/conversations, see What the Hell, Player?.

Examples of Stop Poking Me include:

  • Blizzard Entertainment, after inventing this, raised it to an art form. StarCraft and all Warcraft games (including World of Warcraft) have characters getting angry, doing comedy routines, or just providing additional insight into their characters. The Trope Namer is the original Warcraft orc's "Stop poking me!"
    • Referenced in StarCraft Brood War, with Artanis's "Stop poking me! What do I look like, an orc?", and with the Protoss Observer transmitting "Stop poking me!" over the radio.
    • In the first Diablo, clicking the town's cow would cause it to moo. Clicking it repeatedly would make your character start commenting on it. "Yup, that's a cow all right..."
    • The Valkyries in StarCraft provided a Shout-Out to Young Frankenstein.
    • Warcraft II's Human Footman class would quip "Why do you keep touching me?" and "Are you still touching me?" The former of which was used in the disco-y hidden music track on the expansion CD, and in fact came from the original game.
    • In Warcraft II's case, even the setup program got annoyed if you kept clicking the sound test button.

"Your sound card works perfectly! Your sound card works perfectly! Your sound card works perfectly! Enjoying yourself? Your sound card works perfectly! Your sound card works perfectly! Your sound card works perfectly! It doesn't get any better than this."

  • In Warcraft II, poking a critter often enough and fast enough will result in lots of little animal sounds and finally the critter will just... well... BOOM! and a small bloody mess is all that's left. The explosion actually does damage to its surroundings.
  • The StarCraft critters do it better: Click them enough and they explode in a nuclear explosion. That one doesn't do any damage to other units, but can potentially scare the heck out of another person in casual multiplayer.
    • Warcraft III takes the poking further by having various Monty Python and the Holy Grail jokes being said among the human units, and veiled pokes at the Church of Happyology among the Scourge's more intelligible units. Also, several rare/unique units have some massively long "annoyed" quotes.
  • The Flash game Poke the Penguin may be a reference to the exploding critters in Blizzard's games.
    • There's also a "Poke The Bunny" which is somewhat less extreme; it just sinks it's razor-sharp teeth into the finger and doesn't let go.
  • Command & Conquer has a few examples, such as in Tiberian Wars if one man in the GDI sniper team is shot, the acknowledgement will be much more strained and panicky.
    • In Tiberian Twilight all units have different responses depending on whether they are in combat or not, and then if they are winning or not while in combat.
  • In Banjo-Kazooie, Bottles offers to give you a tutorial of the game. Should you choose to reject his offer, and but still attempt to talk to him, he will refuse to speak with you. Bother him enough times, and he will threaten to erase your game pak. Banjo pleads with him though, and he stops.
  • Company of Heroes has this. Mostly profanity, though the commandos break the fourth wall by asking if one of them can range that camera hanging up there...
    • It actually varied based on the situation they were in, rather than how many times you select them. The American paratrooper units give a fairly cool "Eagles here!" when out of combat, but if selected while in a firefight will yell out "What the f--- do you want?!"
  • In the first Discworld computer game, examining Rincewind too many times causes him to temporarily steal the mouse cursor.
  • Baldur's Gate has something similar. Including comments such as "I do not understand this "mouse magic" that makes me do your bidding!" (incidentally, said by a character with an inhuman intelligence, which arguably allows him to see through the fourth wall) and the classic "Elminster this! Elminster that! Give me 2000 years and a pointy hat and I'll kick his arse!"
    • Xzar, who's like, crazy awesome, actually at one point says "STOP POKING MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEH!" as a Shout-Out to Warcraft.
    • At the other end of the spectrum, is the just plain crazy Tiax, who informs you: "One day, Tiax will point and click!".
    • A possible third occurs when you click on Jaheira; one of her selection lines is, "Yes, oh omnipresent authority figure?"
  • Planescape: Torment likewise. The characters also have quotes for if you try to give them weapons they can't wield or remove items they won't take off.

Morte (a floating skull): Sure, I'll just swing it with my arms!

  • Icewind Dale gives us various character voice sets with this feature. Most are annoyed, some start cursing the player, and one even plays along with the player and then mentions that he knows a druid that can "hook you up with some really good stuff".
  • Warhammer Online does this, not just with the NPCs, but also other player characters.
  • Vateilika in Iji, after you see her in the final Tusan hideout and poke her repeatedly, she eventually breaks down and talks about how her relationship with her boyfriend fell apart because he kept poking her.
  • In the new Mega Man Star Force games, you can poke Omega-Xis with your stylus, resulting in him getting annoyed, and closing the menu. In MMSF3, however, if you poke him enough, he vanishes, and the game appears to have frozen. Waiting a couple of seconds will have him come back, mocking you.
  • Sacrifice: As with Blizzard, the Stop Poking Me quotes are rife with puns and Shout Outs to other media.
  • Knock on the door of the crazy hermit in The Omega Stone enough times, and he'll slip out of character to chew you out.
  • In Final Fantasy IX, if you call the moogle who acts as your save point on the world map without saving enough times, he gets angry and threatens you, first by stating that he's "sharpening his knife, kupo..." before ultimately his dialogue devolves into "STOP IT, STOP IT, STOP IT, STOP IT, KUPOOOOOH!!"
  • Similarly, if you call Mei Ling in Metal Gear Solid too many times without saving, she gets annoyed and sticks her tongue out at you.
  • Medieval 2: Total War plays with this. If you click on your own units, they'll say things like "Yes, Sire?" as one would expect. Click on another faction's units, and they'll say things ranging from "I'm a warrior. Speak to our diplomats." (Actually, your diplomats can speak happily to any army-type unit on the campaign map.) to "Begone! You are not my liege!" and "You wish I was one of your own armies?", though exactly what they say depends on both their Character Alignment and whether the faction is allied, peaceful or at war. Click on an an army of a faction you've just beaten in a battle and they'll say things like "Was that your best shot?".
    • Of course, perhaps the most epic is clicking on a Scottish unit you're hostile to. "AH'LL REEP OFF YER HEDD AND SPIT DOON YER NECK." Or, slightly less awesome: "I gotta claymore here for ye Jimmy..."
    • Empire: Total War has a Deadpan Snarker admiral voice for the British. Clicking on a land square after selecting a fleet results in a delightfully snarky "Ships sail on water, milord..."
  • Heroes of Newerth includes these for many of its playable heroes. This also includes some Shout Outs such as the Pyromancer who shouts "YOU SHALL NOT PASS!" then chuckles and notes that "...I've always wanted to say that."
  • A hilarious variation occurs in Fallout. Speaking to people multiple times will result in them saying different things, and trying it on a cow yields this:

Cow: Moo.
Cow: Moo, moo.
Cow: Moo, I say.

  • Characters in Dragon Age have Stop Poking Me lines if you select/unselect them too many times in the party selection screen. Shale says the trope namer line.
    • If you repeatedly try to have your main character do something they cannot do (e.g. open a locked door) they will call you out on it.

Warden (Aggressive): Can I get you a ladder... so you can get off my back?!

  • Fallout: New Vegas takes a similar tack, as repeatedly giving a follower the same instruction leads to snarking.

Veronica (after being told "stay close/keep your distance three or four times): I don't get any closer until you turn into a leggy brunette!

  • A character from Mass Effect located on Noveria will cycle through lines every time you speak to him, until reaching his breaking point.

Inamorda: If you don't stop poking me, I'll throw you off that balcony.

    • A scientist on the salarian homeworld in Mass Effect 3 would really like you to stop poking the console he's working on. He'll eventually suggest you get your own feces analyzer and stop playing with his.

Scientist: Further manipulation of that object is grounds for further admonishment. [...] Really! You must stop touching that!

  • Pokemon HeartGold and SoulSilver lets the lead Pokemon follow the player around and lets the player interact with it. Doing this too much over a period of time leads to your Pokemon getting angry.
  • A flash game called Get Off My Lawn involves a store owner who, if you tickle him (by clicking on him) enough times, will call the police. This nets you the Restraining Order award.
  • In the first Paper Mario, in the prologue, the guard who keeps you from going into Peach's room will give up if you talk to him enough times.
  • In Nstorm's "Elf Bowling", you click on a little Easter egg in the corner to view pictures of the developers. If you mouse over three pictures in succession, it says "Stop. Poking. MEEEEEEEE!"
  • In Disgaea 2: Cursed Memories and Disgaea 3: Absence of Justice, you can occasionally find friendly NPCs in Item World provide various services. If you talk to some of them too many times, they'll get annoyed and fight you, which may or may not let you reap some additional benefits by defeating them.
  • In Castlevania: Aria Of Sorrow, if you talk to Arikado enough times after fighting Graham, he will get angry with you and change his dialogue to "GO NOW!".
  • In Halo Wars, one of the selection acknowledgements for the Grunt squad is "Yee! Tickles!"
  • In The Longest Journey, if you click April enough times, she will usually say, "April Ryan, you have got to get over yourself. Even funnier after the first scene before she puts on clothes.
  • Empress Himiko, one of the playable mercenaries in Atlantica Online will occasionally say this after being selected.
  • In Starship Titanic, the parrot objects to being prodded. This quickly becomes a more strenuous objection if you click and drag, effectively abducting him from his cage.
  • Not "clicking"-related, but keeping a guest's view window open long enough in Rollercoaster Tycoon will cause him to say "I have the strangest feeling that someone's watching me..."
  • The first time you meet Bud and Lou in Mother 3, Lou will ask you to "stop pressing that thing", but, of course, you have to keep doing it if you want to get out of the dialogue window.
  • League of Legends has Mordekaiser, who has one of his sound clips while moving as "You only need to click once, fool!"
  • Non-game example: the free speech synthesis program Read Please 2003. The current voice is associated with the speaker's portrait. Don't click on the portrait.
  • In Half Life, attempting to enter one of Black Mesa's locked doors enough time will annoy the automated security computer.

This door is locked.
You. Do. Not. Have. Access. To. This. Facility.
Are we going to do this all day?