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Daffy Duck: How's this for a new team name: The Ducks! Bugs Bunny: Please! What kind of Mickey Mouse organization would name their team The Ducks? —Space Jam

Vegeta: C'mon, Nappa, let's not forget why we're here. Nappa: To insult people, Vegeta? Vegeta: No, Nappa, not just to insult people... but to insult people more specifically. —TeamFourStar AWA Special

You are sad, strange little men, and you have my pity. —Lee Unkrich, director of Toy Story 3, in response to the two critics who didn't like the movie

"Fans, as Hollywood Hogan walks away and you look at forty thousand plus on hand, if you're even THINKING about changing the channel to our competition, fans, do not, because we understand that Mick Foley, who wrestled here one time as Cactus Jack, is gonna win their World title. Ha! That's gonna put some butts in the seats, heh." —Tony Schiavone, making a move that would seriously backfire. WCW Monday Nitro, 4 January 1999

"I can't bear to imagine what Elmer Fudd singing "Love Me Tender" must sound like. Oh wait, it'd probably sound a lot like Cyndi Lauper." —Book of Ratings, "More Useless Crap We Get In the Mail"

"This plate is just about as good as any major god (audience laughs). Take that, organized religion, take it!" —Good News Week

"It was a big year for 3D movies. “Toy Story,” “Despicable Me,” “Tron.” Seems like everything this year was three-dimensional. Except the characters in “The Tourist.” "Nothing for “Sex and the City 2″? No, I was sure the Golden Globe for special effects would go to the team that airbrushed that poster. Great job. Girls, we KNOW how old you are. I saw one of you in an episode of “Bonanza,” for [bleeped] sake." —Ricky Gervais, hosting the 68th Golden Globe Awards.

"There is a scene in this movie where a penguin bites Dane Cook in the crotch. I'd like to find that penguin and buy it a drink." —Richard Roeper on Good Luck Chuck

"This book fills a much-needed gap." —Moses Hadas

Lorne Michaels: Of course Sarah's breasts are beautiful. I just don't want the audience to think you're sexist. Nicolas Cage: Sexist? I'm not sexist! That's the last thing I am! Lorne Michaels: All right, Nic. If you're going to talk about killer bods, I think you should mention... Sofia Coppola. Nicolas Cage: (grabs Lorne) Hey! That's my cousin! Lorne Michaels: You see? I-I-I-I did that to make a point. You see, when you're talking about someone that's close to you it's different, isn't it? Nicolas Cage: Oh... oh... oh you're right. Oh God! They must hate me! What am I going to do? Lorne Michaels: Don't worry, you'll be fine. Nicolas Cage: Well they-they-they probably think I'm the biggest jerk who's ever been on the show. Lorne Michaels: No, no. That would be Steven Seagal. —Saturday Night Live

"If all the young ladies in attendance at the annual Yale spring ball were laid end to end, I wouldn't be at all surprised." —Dorothy Parker

"This is how we're represented. Unbelievable." —Dracula in Hotel Transylvania after seeing a clip of Twilight.

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