The Account

Everything About Fiction You Never Wanted to Know.

The Account is an adventure audio drama by podcaster "Cayenne" Chris Conroy, and part of the Tekdiff Podcast. It tells the story of ordinary office drone Hanover Philips of the Metadyne Corporation, who one day distinguishes himself from his colleagues by subduing and investigating a portfolio of pure evil that had been sucking up the company's considerable resources and converting its offices into an "antechamber of Hell."

The titular Account represented by that portfolio is known as Ave Nova, and that name provides tenuous clues as to where else its influence might be found. Hanover, who now knows as much as anybody about the Account, is summarily knighted Sir Hanover of Metadyne and sent on a quest to root out Ave Nova's power wherever it lies in the Midlands.

That's another thing: The Account takes place in the Midlands, an all-inclusive modern-day fantasy setting, which was cut off from Earth some time ago and only recently re-opened. Hanover, as a native of Earth, is something of an odd man out in the Midlands, but he quickly acquires a helpful goblin squire named Nyro and makes a name for himself as a knight.


Tropes used in The Account include:
  • Our Goblins Are Wickeder - Nyro, Hanover's squire, is a goblin with impressive fighting finesse and the ability to sense magic with an impressive degree of nuance. The latter is pretty typical of Goblins in the Midlands.
  • Our Angels Are Different - Angels seem to be the ones behind The Account itself, and though they're fairly elusive, evidence suggest they're not nice.
  • Light Is Not Good - The aforementioned angels are "creatures of light," which doesn't make them pleasant.
  • Humans Are the Real Monsters - two-thirds subverted; some unspecified number of years ago, one-third of the humans turned into psychopathic killers and were exiled to Earth. Now the road to Earth is back open and everyone's a little leery of humans who immigrated to the Midlands from there.
  • Fantastic Racism - The "Rest Stop" chapter introduces Alan Ruby, a trucker from Earth who suddenly finds himself in the Midlands and starts hurling the word "monster" at the goblins and gnolls around him. He gets the same kind of treatment he'd get from using analogous Earth epithets in a racially diverse environment.
  • Calling Your Attacks - Knights have a number of supernatural abilities in the Midlands, independent of their race or origin, and it's customary to name them and call them out. Hanover's signature is the "Burst Punch," apparently a wave of concussive force, and other knights consider the name to be poorly thought-out. Others knights' attacks include "Red Rondo" and "Havoc Anthem," which arguably have a better ring to them.