The Computer Is a Cheating Bastard/Quotes

Everything About Fiction You Never Wanted to Know.


Computer Chess Game: Checkmate. Checkmate.
MacReady pours his drink into the computer tower, frying it
MacReady: Cheating bitch.

"You wanna know how I feel now? I'm fucking enraged! You don't just change the rules like that! This is shit-sauce!"

James "The Angry Video Game Nerd" Rolfe on Little Red Hood

"I swear that these games were programmed by The Joker."

James "The Angry Video Game Nerd" Rolfe on Batman: Return of the Joker

"Don't you know? 'CC' in Mario Kart refers to 'Cheating Capacity'. On 50cc, they have a much lower cheating capacity than on 150cc, where everyone but you is Hacking to go max speed all the time."

Post on VGF on the cheatsy AI in Mario Kart. This isn't an exaggeration.

"Oh, and to add insult to injury, Seth is generally regarded as one of the least effective player characters in the game. That's right: He's only awesome when he's computer-controlled. Because the computer is a cheap, cheating bastard."

The thing about video game basketball is that the computer decides whether or not the ball goes in when you shoot.

David Wong, John Dies at the End

"Yeah, you know it's a Pokémon Let's Play if you get random criticals when you don't need them, your opponent gets them all the time at the most crucial moments, you don't catch Pokémon when they're in perfectly catchable ranges..."

Bob: Matrix! Help!
Matrix: I can't! The rules are clear!
Bob: You're a renegade! CHEAT!
Matrix: Oh, right...

ReBoot, computer characters abusing the trope, again.

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