The Waterboy/Funny
- "I hope ya'll like what I did to your lawnmower." VROOOOOOOOM!
- Farmer Fran pinching his erected nipples as Bobby throws the ball at the goal.
- Water sucks! It really really sucks! Water sucks! It really really sucks!
- Bobby's mom attacking his scumbag father near the end.
- "There's a lot of pain and shame in those eyes. An unbelievably disturbing image".
- YOU CAN DO IT guy is a walking, screaming fountain of CMOFs
- YOU CAN DO IT! CHOP HIS FUCKING HEAD OFF!
- YOU CAN DO IT! YOU CAN DO IT ALL NIGHT LOOONG!
- At the Bourbon Bowl, Bobby faces Meaney again:
Meaney: Hey, Waterboy! Is your girlfriend gonna save you again? |
Bobby: Everything is the devil to you, Mama! Well, I like school, and I like football! And I'm gonna keep doin' them both because they make me feel good! (runs out, slamming the door, then comes back in) And by the way, Mama. Alligators are ornery 'cause of their "medulla oblongata"! (runs back out, then back in again) And I like Vicki, and she like me back! (almost in tears by this point) And she showed me her boobies and I like them too! (slams the door on Mama)! |
- When Bobby speaks at the football camp:
Lawrence "L.T." Taylor: Tell me, what is your secret? How do you find yourself in the right position all the time? |
- "Shut up, Brent."
- In one game, Bobby imagines the opposing quarterback is his Mama:
Imaginary Mama: I forbid you to talk to that enchantress! She's the devil! |
- After he knocks him down, Bobby, still visualizing him as his Mama, hugs and kisses him, apologizing to "her". The quarterback, in concussion, forgives him.
- The only idea in Bobby's Suggestion Box:
Dear Waterboy |
- Back to The Waterboy