Wall Banger/Live-Action TV/Disney Sitcoms

Everything About Fiction You Never Wanted to Know.


Hannah Montana

  • In the Hannah Montana episode "Papa's Got a Brand New Friend", Miley/Hannah and her dancers employ a new choreographer after the other one is badly injured by Miley/Hannah's HI-LA-RI-OUS shenanigans. What happens next is just stupid: The dance teacher is a complete Jerkass, demanding Lily/Lola stand in the corner because she's not a dancer (in a way eerily resembling The Blair Witch Project), shouting at dancers who can't take his strenuous workouts, making the dancers do push-ups, and on top of that, putting Miley into a marionette-style harness she can't escape from, humiliating her by making her hit herself and do the chicken dance. But does Miley tell him to piss off? Well of course not: Because he's friends with Miley/Hannah's dad, she won't fire him. No. Okay, this guy is not in her FATHER'S employment. He's in HER employment. She can just say 'you're fired, you dick' and be done with it! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH KIDS' TV?!
    • She was going to fire him but then he saved her father's life(via Suck Out the Poison) causing her to give an exasperated "come on", cause how could she be mean to the man who saved her father's life? And in the end she fires him anyway.
  • "Kiss It All Goodbye". After the previous two episodes where Hannah's secret of being Miley was let out, Miley is hated by nearly everyone except her friends, and accused of being a liar. Even when her aunt Dolly visits and tries to talk Miley out of her fear, but she refuses. She even attempts to use this "What, you're gonna let fear ruin your life?" against Robbie Ray. After a vision of herself 20 years in the future, and a week of trying to keep herself safe, she is finally convinced to leave the house and perform her newest song on stage. And despite the events of the episode prior, it all works out. Non Sequitur Episode, anyone?
  • A small one at the end of the episode where she reveals the secret. Rico, Jackson, and Jackson's girlfriend are singing about what just happened, and say that "It used to be that no one knew, except a very very few", and then proceed to count them(they forget about Roxy and the woman from the movie); Lily, Oliver, Jake, Jessie, the girlfriend, and Hannah's entire hometown. Yeah, a thousand people (at least) is a "Very very few" apparently.

Wizards of Waverly Place

  • "Daddy's Little Girl" falls under this for me. This really portrayed Alex as a much different person just because Maxine was there, unlike at least 70% of the episodes in the series. He cancels their monthly breakfast with Alex to hang out with Maxine, and when Alex makes him a meatball sandwich, he eats some of it, but then stops to spend more time with Maxine, saying he doesn't feel very hungry. And at the end of the episode, Jerry tells Alex that he was spending so much time with Maxine because she reminded him of Alex. Had Max not been transformed into a girl, things would be much different. "Daddy's little freak" indeed.
  • In the Wizarding world there seems to be a law against everything: dating a werewolf but you may become mortal? Can't let you do that. Being something the Wizarding world doesn't like even if you don't/can't hurt people? Hunted down and probably killed(E.G Fake-A-Horsius). Marrying a mortal? Giving up magic despite being the most level-headed and competent member of your family. Turning your teenage little brother into a little girl, possibly forever? A-OK. Justin and Alex receive no punishment or comeuppance for this act, performed in front of a Wizarding world official for extra frustration, and in subsequent episodes Maxine is all too happily accepted by 'her' family.
  • The fourth season premier. Basically, all the wizards have been captured by the government, and Alex, deciding to do something good for a change, decides the only thing to do would be to reveal magic to the world so people would get mad and demand that the government let them go. It may not be the best plan, but the real problem is revealed when it's revealed that it was all a trick. No wizards are captured, and they just wanted to see how they'd handle the situation. Apparently, the Powers That Be value The Masquerade more highly than its participants and did not show leniency; Alex lost points for breaking it.

The Suite Life On Deck

  • "The Play's The Thing". The students have to participate in Cody's play for their final drama assignment. Bailey accuses Cody of making a play that is nothing more than a "thinly veiled portrayal" of her breakup with him, which Cody denies, and she refuses to perform. And then he has to get HIMSELF to play as Hailey, while Zack plays Brody. When it's play night, they don't get many people in the audience, and Bailey is as hostile as ever. And during the play, "Hailey" gets killed off and Bailey's reaction is easily justifiable. After the play is over, Cody confesses to Zack that the play is based off of his break-up with Bailey. Then, when Cody goes to apologize to Bailey, she thinks they should never speak to each other again and shuts the door in his face. Sorry Cody, but this was a pretty bone-headed move on your part. Then, in the later 3-part "Twister" special, they DO get back together. Long story. Go see the episode for yourself if you're curious. While it seems like Cody got what he deserved (Bailey wanting to never speak to him again), the Wall Banger in question is killing off "Bailey", which some did not like.
  • In "Prom Night", Ms. Tutweiler claims that it was harsh of Moseby to cancel the prom because he "can't take a joke". Let's recap: Moseby was horrified because he was floating in a stormy sky. On a chair. Lifted by balloons. And then he is forced to land by a helicopter into the ocean, and then rescued by a "loathsome baboon". And his clothes get ripped. Is that seriously supposed to be the meaning of "can't take a joke"? NO! While it was Played for Laughs (and admittedly the episode was pretty funny), that's a serious matter, not a joke that you can't expect them to take seriously. HE COULD HAVE BEEN KILLED. This is subverted at the very end of the episode when Moseby admits he did overreact, but for the most part, it isn't the kind of thing for one to expect others to see merely as "a joke".
    • Well, he said that before HE DOES THE SAME FUCKING PRANK TO ZACK AS REVENGE!!!! So, he probably didn't even mean it, which makes it more of a Wall Banger.

Shake It Up

  • Shake it Up is full of dance sequences and all of them, unless they're being preformed by an advertised group, have the two main girls front and center. This not only leads to plenty of wall bangers when they really don't deserve to be there (For example, one dance number involved jump rope. The people that aren't main characters are doing complicated flips and turns, and the main girls are in the front, doing the normal jumping and crossing their arms once or twice), but also gives us an enormous wall banger when there's an entire episode about them being in the back too much.

Other

  • High School Musical has plenty, but the Dethroning Moment of Wallbangery has to be when the drama teacher changes the time of the callback audition for no apparent reason other than a couple of students told her to. It doesn't even occur to her to check and see if the other participants might have conflicts. It was subtly suggested that she did it on purpose; she didn't like the other participants much and was convinced they were going to ruin theater forever. But that would be even worse - it would make her petty and vindictive as well as stupid. The only reason the 'other participants' were in that position was because she invited them back. It's not like this was a performance; this was a callback for her to decide who to pick.
    • Gabriella saw Troy declare that he wouldn't do the play or be with her on live camera. It never occured to her that this was an obvious set up. He was being harassed into saying it. Christ, good job at being the "freaky genius girl," Gab...
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