Weirdness Magnet/Quotes

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What am I, flypaper for freaks?
—Ancient net.saying, now found on T-shirts
Don't you try to outweird me, three-eyes. I get stranger things than you free with my breakfast cereal.

Is it weird in here, or is it just me?

"Weirdness in small amounts is good. Weirdness in large amounts is great."
—Benjamin Strevens
Sometimes weird things just happen...
—Sam Beckett, Quantum Leap ("Good Morning, Peoria")

"Say, Rose? Do you believe in Magic?"
"Not really, no. But that's NOT what you're asking me."
"It's not?"

"Nope. What you're asking me is, do I believe in weird shit? And the answer is yes. Of course I do. I'd be crazy not to. I've had a weird shit life."
—Rose and Carla, THE SANDMAN: THE KINDLY ONES
"You're nothing but a trouble magnet, young lady. Since you started attending, we've had a 20% rise in laser mishaps, a 50% increase in super villain attacks, and a quadrupling of interstellar invasions. Your behavior leaves me no choice. I am going to have to call your mother."
—Vice Principal Razinski, My Life as a Teenage Robot
"Everyday you attract some sort of super mayhem to our school, usually before lunch."
"We're not talking about the same thing," he said. "For you the world is weird because if you're not bored with it you're at odds with it. For me the world is weird because it is stupendous, awesome, mysterious, unfathomable; my interest has been to convince you that you must accept responsibility for being here, in this marvelous world, in this marvelous desert, in this marvelous time. I wanted to convince you that you must learn to make every act count, since you are going to be here for only a short while, in fact, too short for witnessing all the marvels of it."
—Don Juan (Carlos Castenada)
Life's weird, that's why I'm sticking around till the end.
—George Neville-Neil
"I must be a freak magnet."
Adell from Disgaea 2

Professor Minerva McGonagall: [to Harry, Ron, and Hermione] Why is it that, whenever anything happens, it's always you three?

Ron Weasley: I've been wondering that for six years, Professor.

Michelangelo: How come all the weird stuff always happens to us? I mean, we were just minding our own business, when WHAM, that time lady fell out of the sky, right on top of us! Now we're stuck here AND we've gotta go to that creepy-loking place! It just doesn't seem fair!!!
Raphael: ...you done?

Michelangelo: Yeah, I'm done. Let's go save Renet.

Elisa: That's some story all right. Gargoyle clans, mutated brothers, magic spells. You threw in everything but King Arthur and the Holy Grail.

Goliath: Yes, well, we haven't encountered the Holy Grail yet...
"Great! Now go away! I'm tired of the horrible things that happen while you're around!"
Charlie the Unicorn in Charlie the Unicorn 2
"Welcome to Smallville: Land of the Weird, Home of the Strange!"
Chloe Sullivan in Smallville
"Hello, I'm Bill Bailey and I'm a bit of a nutter magnet."
Bill Bailey, comedian
"He's the Avatar. Stuff like this happens to us a lot."
"Why do all of these weird things always flock to me?"
Louise, Zero no Tsukaima
"How did my life get to the point where that is not a strange sentence to me?" [1]
"Ever since you got that watch, you became a magnet for the weird."
Gwen, Ben 10
"When you cross over into the weird stuff, there's no going back. Hector has a theory on it. Calls it the law of 'Anomalous Phenomena Attraction.' He explained it to me once. Didn't really pay attention, but it boils down to 'weird shit pulls in more weird shit.'"
Duke, Gil's All Fright Diner
"You gotta understand something about Sam, lady. Like, picture a typical N-M-S client. You know, just some normal guy, living a normal life... Then one day he wakes up and there's haunted bacon in the freezer, or something! Sam is that guy times a hundred. It's like he's some kind of Weirdness Magnet!"

Lt. Stone: I find it very odd that you two are the only ones in Angel Grove outside of the Power Rangers to face off with a different monster every week!

Skull: Lt. Stone, it's true. Every time we turn around, well (sputters), there they are.
“I’m guessing you only intended to honor your promise on the times that you had to. Therefore… By avoiding the weirdness that goes with super-heroics, you might never have a reason to be Starman at all... That’s the thing, Jack, my boy. I didn’t want to tell you earlier when we struck our deal that you’d play the hero, but the weirdness finds you. Like it or not.
Ted Knight, Starman #4
  1. Namely, "A platypus has tied me up in my own pants!"