Zisteau
[1]When Minecraft proved to be too tame, Vechs came along to destroy all you hold dear. He challenged you with scorching lava. With endless ocean. With floating islands and trap-filled caverns, shadowy deserts and sinister trees, varied landscapes with severely limited resources and sunny tropical islands bereft of normal foliage.
And Vechs looked on all he had created, and laughed, and said, "They will never make it out alive."
But then came Zisteau, and he looked upon these challenges and said, "Feel the power of the Sign."[2]
Zisteau has finished his LPs of:
- The original Survival Island Minecraft map
- Balder's Gate (Incomplete due to hard drive crash)
- Portal 2
- The Super Hostile Sea of Flame Minecraft map (also incomplete due to the above reason)
- Super Hostile Kaizo Caverns
- Super Hostile Infernal Sky with MyselfOverwhelmed
- Super Hostile Legendary
He is currently playing:
- Dark Souls
- Life on Bogota, where he plays Minecraft using the seed "Bogota" with his friends.
- Mindcrack, a community of several Youtubers playing Minecraft.
- Terraria
This game provides examples of:
- Alliteration: The real names of the Life on Bogota crew all start with T.
- Angrish: He makes very strange noises when flustered or freaking out, variously described as "panicking in high-speed Morse code" and "lapsing back into his native tongue."
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dogdoc: I thought zombie pigmen just went uweee! uweeeek! |
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- Ascended Fanboy: Vechs gives a Shout-Out to Zisteau in several of his maps. In one, when giving you an early weapon, he notes "He'll probably still use a sign." In another, he lays out a lot of early resources, but sets aside one chest with nothing but a sign, a stick, and a pair of "man pants," labeled "Zistonian Equipment Station" (?).
- Newer maps have chests filled with nothing but leather pants and an enchanted sign, labeled Zistonian Battlesign
- Attention Deficit... Ooh, Hey There's A Dark Corridor: Zisteau has a hard time making it out of the abandoned mineshaft in Life on Bogota.
- Buffy-Speak: "This is now dirt region... area... type... place."
- Suckerfish, Zombie Brain, Pig Skull thing!About 5:16 in.
- Cozy Voice for Catastrophes: Like Helloween 4545 and the Yogscast, Zisteau is very pleasant to listen to, even if the circumstances put you on edge due to sheer suspense (or hordes of shrieking ghasts).
- Distracted By the Shiny: You've got precious, precious wood to deliver to a safer area, and you stop to patch the irregular floor with gravel??
- Drinking Game: He's making one.
- Lava Adds Awesome: See Weapon of Choice
- Evil Laugh: At 20:34 in this video.
- Hoist by His Own Petard In Ultra Hardcore Season 6 Episode 2 ,stating for himself to not be reckless,he quickly goes and burns away half his life; go figure.
- Also in Ultra Hardcore Season 5 Episode 3 he finds another player, runs for them (taking fall damage while jumping off a cliff to get to them) attacks and... finds himself dead.
- Improbable Weapon User: Given nothing at the start of Kaizo Caverns, he plucks the nearest sign from the wall, and history is made.
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Break down your tree with a sign, like God intended. |
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- Precision F-Strike: He sounds like a pleasant, mild-mannered, amiable uncle, even chatting away with the creepers he's killing... but he swears abundantly when things go wrong. Not in an angry way, usually, but it's still enough to offend a 7-year-old[3].
- Sequence Breaking: A pit of lava between you and that tree. A clearly marked tunnel to the left. Digging to the right reveals a lava trap. Give up and go where you're told? Never! Zisteau digs his way right up and around to the left, over the tunnel entrance. Through sandstone, with his bare hands. He not only avoids the tunnel entirely[4], but finds a secret room in the process.
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I have managed to completely avoid that jumping trap--and, more important than avoiding this lava trap, I'm avoiding going the direction that the map designed to kill me intended for me to go. There's a small victory there, I think. |
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- Shoot the Dog: Quite literally in Life on Bogota. Several times, actually.
- Super OCD: Is very notable for this. Brutally exploited by Team Canada in their prank.
- Suspicious Videogame Generosity: The few times Zisteau falls for it are priceless.
- For example, the time he cheerfully hops a minecart track off to parts unknown, notes "this may be a bad idea," and soon is bathing in lava. Laughing while he dies.
- Weapon of Choice: His sign and Advanced Lighting Technique.
- With Great Power Comes Great Insanity: When Zisteau finally gets lava buckets in Legendary, he ends up covering the entire map in lava. While playing happy music.