The Long Kiss Goodnight/Funny

Everything About Fiction You Never Wanted to Know.


Charly: Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
Mitch: I hope not, 'cause I'm thinking about how much my balls hurt!

  • Charly/Sam and Caitlin are trapped in the freezer, and Charly is about to break them out:

Caitlin: Mommy, am I gonna die?.
Charly/Samantha: Oh, no, baby, no. You're not going to die... they are. (lights the match) Cover your ears. Hey, should we get a dog?

Charly: I read it in this Harold Robbins novel. The guy bites her on the ear, distracts her from the pain. You ever try that?
Mitch: (stares incredulously) No, I sock 'em in the jaw and yell "pop goes the weasel!"

  • The look Mitch gives Caitlin when she says "Don't hit the cars!" as they drive away from a massive explosion and burning wrecks are raining down around them.
  • Mitch and Sam are running from assassins and take cover on a landing.

Mitch (slightly panicked) OK, I've got three shots left in the revolver, you've got a full clip, just point, and spray.
(Grenade lands next to them)
Mitch (very panicked) Fuck it, run for your life!