Abuse Mistake: Difference between revisions
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{{trope}}
{{quote|'''Ino:''' Oh god, Naruto's really hurting him in there!
'''Sasuke:''' No. He's not. He's having sex with me.|''[[Naruto:
Failing to see the difference between playfulness (or similar) and abuse can be annoying at best and disastrous at worst.
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When [[Played for Laughs]], the mistake is almost always Type A, and quickly corrected. When [[Played for Drama]], however, a real victim might be denied help (Type B), a innocent person might get his life ruined with unfair accusations of abuse (Type A), or the designated "victim" (again Type A) gets stalked or outright oppressed by [[Unwanted Rescue|unwanted "rescuers"]]. These helpers might even go to great lengths [[Manufacturing Victims|trying to force her to "realize" that she's a victim of abuse]]. And no, not the actual abuse that ''they'' are subjecting her to.
See also [[Friendly War]], [[Casual Kink]], and [[Safe, Sane, and Consensual]] for non-abusive stuff that can be mistaken for abuse. Compare [[You Just Ruined the Shot]], for cases where the "victim" was an actor in a movie rather then a participant in a sexual game. Contrast [[Romanticized Abuse]] (with the subtropes [[Bastard Boyfriend]] and [[Bastard Girlfriend]]) as well as [[
{{examples}}
== [[Advertising]] ==
* There was a cleaning ad that played with this trope. A woman is grocery shopping with her arm in a sling. She gives sympathetic shoppers a whole bunch of different stories about how it happened, leading the audience to mistake her injury for domestic abuse. At the end of the commercial, it's revealed she hurt her shoulder trying to scrub soap scum out of the bathtub. The product being sold solves her problem.▼
== [[Anime]] and [[Manga]] ==
* Abiru of ''[[Sayonara, Zetsubou-sensei]]'' has her injuries mistaken for the result of domestic abuse. She actually gets them after tugging on the tails of animals she cares for at the zoo.
* ''[[Love Hina]]''. The girls of the house will think that Keitaro, being [[Accidental Pervert|extremely unlucky and clumsy]], is trying to molest/abuse them, so type A. However, some of their punishments of him will slip the show into type B.
* ''[[Ranma ½]]''. Ranma is constantly the victim of abuse from Akane, but in-universe it's okay because [[Double Standard Abuse (Female on Male)|Abuse Is Okay When
== [[Comic Books]] ==
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* Type A is a Stock plot in [[Donald Duck]]: Donald gets a new job of responsibility, and starts to see abuse and attempted crimes everywhere he looks. Chaos ensues.
== [[Fan
* ''[[Harry Potter and
== [[Film]] ==
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* In ''[[Tucker and Dale vs. Evil]]'', the college kids {{spoiler|and the police}} take for granted that Dale is doing terrible things to Allison.
* In ''[[G.I. Jane]]'', Jordan and her crew are out celebrating at a bar when she goes to use the restroom. As she washes her hands, another female customer pauses as she passes by and, spotting Jordan's badly bruised face, remarks "Ain't really none of my business, but I say 'leave the bastard'." before exiting, which causes Jordan to laugh. (The abuse really happened, but it was part of her special forces training.)
* ''[[God Bless America]]'': In several scenes, the audience is led to believe that someone is about to accuse Frank of mistreating Roxy. Disturbingly, nobody ever get this wrong idea, not even when this little girl is covered in blood and alone in a car at night with an old man who shares no family resemblance with her. When someone ''finally'' gets the idea that the girl might be abused, it's a creep who asks because he wants to join in.
* ''[[Titanic]]'': When Rose try to commit suicide, [[Happily-Failed Suicide|Jack talks her out of it]]. However... {{spoiler|then she slips, falling to her death. He manage to save her, but as he does so she's screaming for help. After he managed to drag her up to safety, some crewmen arrive and assume that he has assaulted her}}.
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* In ''[[Tortall Universe|Protector Of The Small]]'', Keladry goes to the public baths one day to enjoy soaking in the warm water. Concerned women rush over to assure her that whoever he is, even if he's a noble, he'll be caught and tried and made to pay. Keladry is a squire, and her day-to-day injuries from combat training are apparently rather alarming out of context.
== [[Live
* ''[[House (TV series)|House]]'' has several of these. In one episode a patient gets attacked by a woman, who tries to murder him by strangulation. Or rather, that's what the audience and the doctors believe at first. It turns out that it was just erotic asphyxiation. Safe or not is debatable, but at least it was consensual. In another episode, a man rapes a woman, but everyone except the audience knows that it's just a game.
* In one episode of ''[[Law & Order: Special Victims Unit|Law and Order Special Victims Unit]]'', a cop have a bad reputation as several other cops "know" that he used to beat his girlfriend. He even got arrested once. However, it turns out that he had nothing to do with her injuries. It wasn't even a [[Casual Kink|consensual game]], she was cutting herself because of a deep depression.
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* Type A in an episode of ''[[Frasier]]''. When Martin reflects on raising his sons, he mentions that they were so bad at riding bikes they would be covered with bruises. He eventually gave up teaching them how to ride bikes, thinking that his sons' doctor was suspecting him of child abuse.
* In the episode "Driven" of ''[[NCIS]]'', Team Gibbs brings in a suspect for questioning after watching security footage of him sexually assaulting the victim shortly before her death. As it turns out, they were dating, and the "assault" was an entirely consensual expression of [[Casual Kink]].
▲* There was a cleaning ad that played with this trope. A woman is grocery shopping with her arm in a sling. She gives sympathetic shoppers a whole bunch of different stories about how it happened, leading the audience to mistake her injury for domestic abuse. At the end of the commercial, it's revealed she hurt her shoulder trying to scrub soap scum out of the bathtub. The product being sold solves her problem.
== [[Tabletop RPG]] ==
* ''[[Call of Cthulhu (tabletop game)]]'' supplement ''Dreamlands''. When the investigators go to the apartment of Mr. and Mrs. Briggs, they find a man tied to a chair with a bathrobe thrown over him. If they rescue him they discover that he's playing bondage games with his wife.
* ''[[GURPS]] Goblins'', adventure "The Horse Swapping". The ladies are playing Blind Man's Buff inside a house with some male customers while the [[PC
== [[Web Original]] ==
* This is essentially the premise behind [https://web.archive.org/web/20130828225930/http://www.whatisdeepfried.com/COMIX/Family/PAGE1.html Clarissa's public life.] It doesn't really help that the only way she shows it is through risque pictures.
== [[Video Games]] ==
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* The very first episode of ''[[King of the Hill]]'' had a misguided social worker suspect Hank of beating Bobby. His "evidence" included a black eye on Bobby (actually caused by a Little League accident) and an overheard conversation where Bobby and Joseph imitated Hank's tendency to deliver blustering, exaggerated threats when angry.
* An episode of ''[[American Dad]]'' had Francine repeatedly having actual accidents that are often used as excuses by abuse victims, i.e. falling down stairs, getting hit by an opening door, etc. Given Stan's aggressively macho personality, everyone assumes the worst.
** For bonus points, in those scenes Stan is wearing a sleeveless shirt. AKA [[Visual Pun|a "wifebeater"]].
* An early episode of ''[[The Simpsons]]'' ("Home Sweet Home-Dum-Diddly-Doodily") features Bart and Lisa getting placed into foster care when Lisa has no shoes (because bullies took them to play [[Keep-Away]]) and Bart has a case of head lice, and a social worker is called to investigate. They find the house a mess (because Marge went with Homer to a day spa instead of her usual housework), Maggie drinking out of the dog's water bowl (because she could), Grampa [[Senior Sleep Cycle|asleep on the couch]], and [[Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking|the toilet paper hung in the "improper" overhand position.]] Marge and Homer didn't actually neglect the kids, but to the social workers, they looked like unfit parents, and had to take parenting classes in order to get their kids back from their foster parents, the Flanders family.
== [[Real Life]] ==
* Jeffery Dahmer (who killed [[I'm a Humanitarian|and ate]] several people) had one of his victims returned to him by a pair of cops, who thought it was a simple gay domestic quarrel when they found a naked 14 year old boy running away from Dahmer.
* The "Something actually abusive is mistaken for something that doesn't need worrying about" factor is often the reason why [[
* Bullying is often treated as Type B, with a variety of excuses being used ("boys will be boys", "it's just part of growing up", etc).
* Female participants in full-contact martial arts (eg. [[Society for Creative Anachronism]] heavy combat) are often advised to tell their doctors about what they're doing as soon as they step in the door, to prevent a Type A incident.
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[[Category:Psychology Tropes]]
[[Category:Mistaken for Index]]
[[Category:Abuse
[[Category:{{PAGENAME}}]]
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