All Women are Doms, All Men are Subs: Difference between revisions
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{{trope}}
{{quote|''Hey, Mr. S? [[Makes Just
When the authors want to [[Casual Kink|include some BDSM]] into the plot, they might need to have some context and nuance to avoid having the audience [[Abuse Mistake|mistake it for abuse]]. But what if there's no room for nuances, or they think [[Viewers
If you want to know what we're talking about then, quick, think of the last time you saw BDSM portrayed in someway on popular television. What position was the man in? He was wearing a ball-gag and being dragged around by a collar and chain, you say? Well then, you've just encountered this trope. [[All Women Are Prudes|Only slightly less common]] are women in BDSM, and without even checking you can't deny that ''they're'' never the ones tied to a bedpost and being whipped. Well, not unless it's an outright porno. If there was a woman involved, she was a dominatrix, without exception. Men might be in a dominant role, but only if they are dominating another man because [[All Men Are Perverts]] and because [[Double Standard Rape (Male
Actually, you might say you've only really encountered this trope when you notice that this is the only acceptable portrayal of BDSM on TV. If you want to know why, then try to imagine the opposite. The general populace tolerates the BDSM subculture on their televisions only when it can be [[Played for Laughs]] and no matter what you do, you can't play a man tying up and flogging a woman for laughs. [[Double Standard|You just can't]]. Besides, women look much hotter in Latex and holding riding crops than men in the same. It's funny when a woman dominates a man [[Men Act, Women Are|because]] [[Sarcasm Mode|women are weak ineffectual creatures (rendering the action inoffensive) and men are supposed to be strong and dominant, thus any man in the role of sub deserves to be ridiculed and by no means sympathized with, even if he's being forced into it.]]
This trope tends only to be in effect when [[Bondage Is Bad]] is at least toned down. If the villain is the one being portrayed as BDSM enthusiast, then he stands a good chance of torturing women; just don't expect anyone but a really evil villainess to enjoy it. The main purpose of this trope is to make BDSM imagery viable for comedy. Secondarily, it can also make BDSM relationships palatable enough to the common viewership for our characters to explore the idea... via ancillary characters who only exist until the end of the episode.
Any full aversion of this trope seriously risks [[Values Dissonance]] unless it can somehow be made clear to the audience that the man has the woman's full and explicit consent. And even then, it will still probably be shunned at the very least as [[Girls Need Role Models]].
Another part of this trope is the implication that all men secretly desire to be dominated and all women secretly desire to dominate. This adds to the comedy since it is a reversal of traditional roles and consequently, as the contradiction easily lends itself to pop psychology leading some to propound that at least this part of the trope is [[Truth in Television]].
This trope is also most common in television and movies. The more private nature of printed works often prevents them having to appeal to such a wide and public audience, the facilitation of which is the main function of this trope.
Obviously a [[Double Standard]]. Compare to [[Double Standard Rape (Female
{{examples|Examples}}▼
{{noreallife|This is a trope about how characters are depicted in media.}}
== [[Anime and Manga]] ==▼
* An episode of ''Zoku [[Sayonara Zetsubou Sensei]]'' featured the standard image of a salaryman on a leash by a beautiful blond bombshell as a comedic representation of someone who didn't understand his proper place in life (Ugly people don't deserve happiness) and suffered as a result.▼
▲== [[Anime]] and [[Manga]] ==
▲* An episode of ''Zoku [[Sayonara, Zetsubou
** On a side note, the original ''Sayonara Zetsubou Sensei'' almost averted this by flashing some images of girls tied up in shibari position at the beginning of its opening. It was intended to be comical which should have averted the trope, but the comedy is derived from the juxtaposition of the seriousness of showing such images as opposed to the general comedic content of the show.
* ''[[Sorcerer Hunters]]'' - Carrot and pretty much every female in the show.
* In ''[[He Is My Master]]'', Yoshitaka never quite gets to do the sick and perverted things he wants to do to his maids. Not even when it would make complete logical sense that he should be able to. The plot always contrives to stop him. It even seems, to all outward appearances, as if Mitsuki (and at one point Anna) would be totally okay with this. But it never happens. [[What an Idiot!|He doesn't even seem to consider Mitsuki a viable target]].
** In fact as he ends up being bound and whipped by Izumi and some french girl in one episode.
** However, there is that one picture in the third episode we get where Izumi is imagining where things will go if Anna becomes Yoshitaka's maid, and that's pretty much a full aversion as it is totally [[Played for Laughs]] (But it was probably only allowed because nothing actually happened).
* ''[[Oniichan no Koto Nanka Zenzen Suki
** Also, the picture on the cover of said magazine is radically different. The Manga version shows a helpless mostly naked loli-ish girl bound and in distress. The TV version features a MUCH more "mature" looking woman wearing a leather corset and panties, still with cuffs but now wearing a faint smile on her face.
** Not to mention Shuusuke's masochistic fantasies in later chapters (Though he'd probably be happy on either side of the kink as long as he gets to have sex somewhere along the way).
* ''[[MM
* Averted in [[
== [[Comic Books]] ==
* Inverted in, of all places, [[Spider-Man]]'s comic. He and Mary Jane were surprisingly fond of [[Casual Kink]], as shown in [https://web.archive.org/web/20220616134933/https://superdickery.com/how-does-one-classify-bondage-comics-without-wonder-woman/ the infamous scene] where ''he'' ties ''her'' up.
== [[Film]] ==
* Seen in ''[[Mr. and Mrs. Smith]]'' when Jane is performing her hit on the arms dealer disguised as his dominatrix.
* ''[[High Anxiety]]'' had [[Battleaxe Nurse|Nurse Diesel]] as the dom and Dr. Montague as the sub.
* Mistress Lisa spanking Citizen Elliot in ''[[Exit to Eden]]''
* Averted hard in ''[[Secretary]]'' where Maggie Gyllenhaal is a submissive woman in a sexual relationship with a dominant man portrayed by James Spader.
== [[Literature]] ==
* May or may not be in [[The Diamond Age]] by Neal Stephenson. During a portion of the book, Nell works as a scenario director at a bordello (she literally sits in on sex sessions behind one way glass and directs the actions of the actors/prostitutes). S&M seems to be big in this establishment and it is acknowledged (or rather, vaguely implied and only once) that some of their prostitutes act as subs some of the time. However, the only scene which is narrated is described in the book is definitely F/m and as it is used to draw certain conclusions about the effects of Neo-Victorian culture on a person it does take advantage of the secondary purpose of this trope. Also, as the male sub mentioned is a high-ranking authoritarian figure, it also takes advantage of the primary purpose.
* Inverted in [[
* ''[[
* Averted in ''Fifty Shades of Grey" which follows the sex life of a male dom and his female submissive.
== [[Live-Action TV]] ==
* The titular character of ''[[House (TV series)|House]]'' often remarks on his own masochist sympathies. So far as we know, he's joking since we haven't ever seen it and probably never will as might it might compromise his image as a domineering over-masculine character if he was ever spotted in such a situation (but the very fact that we're suppose to pick up on the humor of it automatically makes this trope apply).
** One episode of House featured a masochistic asian dude and his dominatrix sexfriend. The episode played the kink for drama.
*** That episode also had Chase mentioning that he was once in a BDSM relationship, House assumed he was the sub and taunted him about it. Though when he went into slightly more detail with his coworkers he stated that it was the other way around, he even tried dominating the patient when he became somewhat uncooperative.
** Another episode averted this by portraying one married couple as enjoying rape fantasies (with the woman being "raped"). But, as it turns out, the wife was poisoning the husband, so either [[Bondage Is Bad]] or she really wasn't enjoying it so much.
* In an episode of ''[[Law
* At least one episode of ''[[Alias (TV series)|Alias]]'' and at least one episode of ''[[Smallville]]'' have featured Sydney and Lois respectively going undercover as a dominatrix in a sex club to squeeze information out of some bad guy, which luckily happens to be submissive.
** In that ''[[Alias (TV series)|Alias]]'' episode, Vaughn also plays a submissive male for Sydney to dominate. There's even jokes about how this is pretty much their actual sex life.
* Shown once (and implied several times) in the ''[[
** When there is a pair of UnSubs working together, the woman is usually the dom, unless the [[Captain Obvious|man is the dom]] or that the team is two men.
* ''[[Sex and
* Michael and Jan on ''[[The Office]]'' are repeatedly implied to be this.
* Like many [[Police Procedural|police procedurals]] ''[[Castle]]'' played the trope straight in an episode where the victim-of-the-week is a sociology PhD student studying BDSM {{spoiler|by becoming a dom}}. But it did feature a hilarious example when ''Beckett'' interrogated a suspect using dom psychology.
{{quote|
* One episode of [[Dollhouse]] started with Echo coming back from a job as a dominatrix and explaining to her handler how BDSM is about trust.
* One of Belle's clients on [[Secret Diary of a Call Girl]] asks her to dabble in this in one episode. Of course, she vamps it up to the nth degree.
* [[Game of Thrones]] is a debatable case. Certainly, men are seen dominating women, but this is typically shown as a bad thing. However, the acts of domination are typically shown as non-consensual, and going WELL beyond SSC. When Joffrey was with a pair of whores they had no objection at all to light spanking, and became distressed only when Joffrey demanded that one of them beat the other first with a belt, and then with his sceptre.
* Subverted in [[Rome]]. It's initially hinted that Octavian will be an abusive husband because of his sadistic tendencies, but we later see him and his wife having mutually rough sex and loving every second of it.
* Used and mildly averted in ''[[
* Subverted in an episode of ''[[Desperate Housewives]]'' called "A Spark To Pierce The Dark." In the episode, Carlos ties Gabrielle (Eva Longoria) to the bed under the impression that they're going to have kinky sex, but he then leaves the room because he's too tired. Eva Longoria herself has stated that she enjoys bondage in real life and is a submissive.
* The American remake of ''Shameless'' shows Kevin and Veronica in a BDSM relationship with Veronica as the dominatrix.
* Subverted in an episode of ''[[General Hospital]]'' where Maxie is handcuffed and having sex with Cooper in a hospital closet.
== [[Web Comic]] ==
* Pretty much the case in ''[[Collar 6]]'': most of the Doms we've seen so far were female. Exceptions include the unnamed Epic Mustache Guy who appeared in two strips, a male dom seen in a flashback, and the unseen but plot-relevant character Michael Kappel. [[
* In ''[[Shiniez]]'', the main couple of the comic are Allison and Lisa, who are in a dom/sub relationship. The other couple, however, inverts this trope, with Alan, Allison's friend, as a dom and Anne as his sub.
== [[Video Games]] ==
* Back when ''[[City of Villains]]'' came out this enforcing this trope was used as the explanation for the inability to tailor the appearance of a Mastermind's minions. The game already allowed for giving minions lines to speak and emote commands (meaning they could be visually abused in various ways), and as a result the designers wanted to ensure all minions would be clearly male or sexless.
** Familiarity and the dwindling of roleplayers dedicated enough to go to the trouble of individually roleplaying their minions has led to this being less noticeable, but the design restriction is still in place, and for the same stated reason. The people who ''do'' abuse their minions do seem to all be either dominatrices or male [[Bad Boss
* The very obscure [[H-game]] ''Otome Rensa: Heart of the Distortion'' revolves around this.
== [[Web Original]] ==
* ''[[
** The one exception was in the ''[[Other M]]'' review when he depicted Samus being dragged around on a leash, but its probably okay because she's still wearing her suit and doesn't look like a girl. More to the point, it illustrated Yahtzee's opinion of ''Other M'''s writing.
** The other exception was [[Lara Croft]] being flogged by her developer.
* Lighter example because you can only have chains in fanfic and also nobody will hesitate to throw a punch, but [[That Guy With
* Averted in ''[[Chakona Space]]'', in foxtaur society vixens are expected to be the dominant gender, Lorene had a lot of trouble finding a mate as she was a natural submissive. Then Garrek was raped by his sister using pheromones that screwed up his hormones and made him more aggressive, the village shaman suggested he try "venting" on Lorene.
== [[Western Animation]] ==
* [[
** Inverted with Mrs. Cartman and her German fetish videos.
* All the time in ''[[
* All the time on ''[[
* Averted in ''[[The Venture Brothers
{{quote|
* Mark and Cally's relationship on ''[[
** Inverted in the clone episode when Clone Mark tortures Cally instead.
{{reflist}}
[[Category:Women Are Delicate]]
[[Category:Sex Tropes]]
[[Category:Gender and Sexuality Tropes]]
[[Category:
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