Badass Boast/Fan Works: Difference between revisions

{{quote| '''Kai:''' Don't come closer--I'll shoot!<br />

'''[[Big Bad|Hiroshi]]:''' Ad what, exactly, do you suppose that ''that'' will accomplish? }}

{{quote| "Know you that I am he who was once Longinus, centurion of the Tenth Legion. [[Julius Beethoven Da Vinci|I have been Roland, Beowulf, Achilles, Gilgamesh]]. I have been called a hundred names and will be called a thousand more before the world goes dim and cold. I have been killed a thousand times and every time I return. I fight for truth. I fight for glory. I fight for love. I fight for beauty. I am Hero. I will return."}}

* "I have walked as a god! I have fought as a god! You will not frighten me, LITTLE MAN!" Not a bad boast, but made all the more awesome [[Shinji and Warhammer 40 K (Fanfic)|considering who's making it.]]

** It's cool in the sense that we are made to remember that Simon is a fantastic and skilled driller, the Squick comes from being made to imagine (along with {{spoiler|Shinji}}) what those drilling skills can do to soft, human flesh.

* From ''[http://www.illegal-art.org/video/wizard.html Wizard People, Dear Reader]'': "I am a beautiful animal! I am a destroyer of worlds! I am ''Harry '''[[Precision F-Strike|fucking]]''' Potter!''"

{{quote| "Yes, I think war is a fool's game. Yes, I believe life -- all life -- is precious. But tell me something, Vharaj -- did you ever listen to my ''enemies''' tales of me? If you did, it's obvious you weren't paying attention. The Daleks do not have emotion, Vharaj. They don't know fear. But do you know what they called me? ''Ka Faraq Gatri''. It means Destroyer of Worlds. I am the Bringer of Darkness, Vharaj. The Oncoming Storm. I've watched worlds and galaxies fall, and rise, and fall again. I fought the Vampires at the dawn of Creation, and I may yet witness the end of the Universe. I brought about the destruction of my own race, the deaths of my children, my grandchildren, my siblings, my friends, all in the name of peace, to save this Universe. So you tell me, Vharaj: ''what do you think I am capable of?"''}}

{{quote| "There are none who can avoid trembling at my power! None! No man alive! Not one! No man alive can avoid trembling at my power!" Jeffiroth cried redundantly, holding his sword straight up above him in a dramatic fashion. "I am the black wind that echoes in the--"<br />

"There he goes again," Xaldin sighed heavily and recalled his lances.<br />

Lexaeus groaned. "I would be much more mildly impressed with his fighting abilities if he would stop taking breaks to spew out poetry." }}

{{quote| '''Jayne''': Look. I've gotten into fights with idiots ten times meaner than you two. I fought militia, mercenaries, and goons just like you. Hell, I've fought Alliance marines before(...)I've even tangled with Reavers. }}

** In an earlier arc, Mal slights Badger, who warns him to never come back to Persephone again. Mal's response....

* [[Sonic the Hedgehog]], while in [[Tranquil Fury]], gives out an awesome boast to this sorry bastard who hurt Tails(of another dimension...long but very well done story: [http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4256772/1/He_Is_My_Master He Is My Master]).

{{quote| ''Sonic'': "My name is Sonic. Sonic the Hedgehog. I move at speeds faster than you can imagine...I am the protector of Mobius, a dimension you have never even heard of. I am capable of channeling the power and even the wrath of Chaos when I chose to...I have saved moons tied to planets. I have watched the world burn. I have defeated Chaos, the God of Destruction with my ''own bare hands''...And you...[[Oh Crap|just]] [[Berserk Button|hurt]] [[Big Brother Instinct|my little brother]]!"}}

{{quote| ''For all your claims to be invincible, for all your bragging and pride, I've beaten you twice. That's why you searched me out in this rain; not for revenge, but to prove to yourself that I'm not better than you. My victories over you eat you alive, and you know it. And even if you do kill me, even if I'm dead and gone, [[Scars Are Forever|your damaged, imperfect blade will always be there]]: an eternal reminder of my triumph over you.''}}

** And when the true [[Big Bad]] reveals himself to the [[Disc One Final Boss]]:

* Hal Jordan's threat to [[Jerkass God]] Hades during the [[JLA Watchtower]] Olympics plot. He's Badass enough as is...but he proceeds to remind everyone what he was between his snit as Parallax and his return.

{{quote| '''Hal:''' "ENOUGH! I have seen enough, Hades. I have seen you cheat time and again, and these heroes succeeded despite it all. You may be a god, Hades, but I was once the wrath of the God Himself. Do you dare risk that I have forgotten all your sins, which were once laid bare for me to see? You have lost. Return Troia and Nightwing to us, and call off your armies, before you face punishment that would make even the Furies cry." }}

{{quote| '''Ruby:''' “I’m not telling you anything. Now get out of Yokai, and ''stay out'' if you don’t want me using these vines as creatively, and as painfully as I see fit.”}}

** This is countered quickly by Kaze:

{{quote| {{spoiler|'''O.B.A.M.A.'''}}: "You," he said, "You're..."<br />

{{spoiler|'''Kaminic'''}}: "The only Absolution given form. The Former God of Water. The Aspect of Evolution. The Name of A Thousand Suns. I am the Alpha and Omega, Beginning and End, I am HE Who is CALLED '''I AM''', you arrogant bastard. I am the Logos, the Garden, the Primal Meme. {{spoiler|I am '''''Kaminic'''''.}} And," I said, twisting through fivespace in less than an instant, coming out right behind the Man who had become a God, "I am your death." }}

{{quote| Yes ... I am Warmaster ... I was not made for peace ... I was not made for the world my father saw ... my world is in endless bloodshed ... my world is the crucible of war ... my world is the grim darkness of the far future ...<br />

I am Horus, Warmaster of Chaos. I bow to none but lords of war. Where my blade falls, death follows. Where my blade points; legions conquer. Dark has my dreams been of late, filled with moral values and family-friendly entertainment. No longer will this plague my domain! The grim darkness of the far future shall return, by my command! }}

{{quote| "''That's right''. I am the {{spoiler|''princess''}} of the {{spoiler|''Golden Empire''}}. I can {{spoiler|erase a human personality}} with my ''thoughts''. I {{spoiler|remember}} more {{spoiler|centuries of experiences}} than you can even count. ''I can {{spoiler|resurrect the dead}}''. And you are going to ''calm down and listen to me''."}}

* There's one [[Dollhouse]] crossover<ref> with what will become immediately evident</ref> (Name? Link?) where just as the [[Big Bad]] is bearing down on a hostage (also evil, but more experienced in the crossing-over universe's conventions), the hostage warns that he better surrender, because an acquaintance is coming and is going to say the four scariest words in the universe, and goes on for quite some time about how he needs to give himself up ''now'', despite holding the high ground, because once he hears those four words, he is dead meat and has no chance whatsoever, not even for mercy. This is, naturally, followed by the acquaintence arriving and saying those four words:

{{quote| [[Doctor Who|Hello, I'm the Doctor]].}}

** The lead-up is a conventional example, and unusual in that it turns the perfectly ordinary introduction into one as well.

{{quote| "I am not some innocent Bureau mage. I am a Wolkenritter. Hell followed in my footsteps once. I am nightmare, I am hatred, I am rage and the death of worlds. Now do you understand why you should never have sought to see how far I may be pushed?"}}

** ''A Numbered Existence'' gives us Sette's take on her job: "When nightmares have their own bad dreams, they dream of me."

* The [[The Captain|Alpha Houndoom]] in [[Poke Wars|Poké Wars: The Exigence]] says this prior to battling the Golem leader.

{{quote| "My pack is strong. You may have taken many of us, but not all of us are gone, and you will not take another! I will show you their strength, for I carry it on my back! '''I will defeat you for those that have fallen'''!"}}

{{quote| '''Takato'''://moves his right leg forward and clenches his right fist// ''"What did you do to my friends!"'' <br />

'''Takato (Thoughts)''': ''"Hey…how did that sound?"''<br />

{{quote| '''Rika''': ''You're underestimating us Gogglehead!''<br />

'''Takato''': ''No Rika, [[Pre-Ass-Kicking One-Liner|You're underestimating me]].'' }}

{{quote| ''Dalek Sec'': ''I COME FROM A [[Doctor Who|PLACE]] WHERE [[Sufficiently Advanced Aliens|GODS ROAM A-MONGST THE STARS]], WHERE THERE ARE [[Reality Warper|BEINGS THAT COULD E-RASE ALL OF RE-AL-ITY]] [[Physical God|WITH BUT A ME-RE THOUGHT]], [[Time Master|THAT COULD BEND TI-ME TO THEIR WILL]] [[Ret-Gone|AND FREE YOU FROM HAVING EVER BEING BORN]]!! YET, NO MAT-TER HOW PO-WER-FUL THEY ARE, [[The Dreaded|THEY ALL FEAR THE SAME THING]].''<br />

''Kyubey'':''You?''<br />

* [[Harry Potter and The Methods of Rationality]] gives us a combined [[Badass Boast]] and [[Crowning Moment of Heartwarming]]:

{{quote| '''Harry''': I know you now {{spoiler|I comprehend your nature, you symbolize Death, through some law of magic you are a shadow that Death casts into the world.}} And Death is not something I will ever embrace. It is only a childish thing, that the human species has not yet outgrown. And someday... We'll get over it... And people won't have to say goodbye any more...{{spoiler|"EXPECTO PATRONUM!"}} And someday when the descendants of humanity have spread from star to star, they won't tell the children about the history of Ancient Earth until they're old enough to bear it; and when they learn they'll weep to hear that such a thing as Death had ever once existed!{{spoiler|You are not invincible, and someday the human species will end you.}} I will end you if I can, by the power of mind and magic and science. I won't cower in fear of Death, not while I have a chance of winning. I won't let Death touch me, I won't let Death touch the ones I love. And even if you do end me before I end you, Another will take my place, and another, Until the wound in the world is healed at last...}}

{{quote| '''Sean''': We're Power Rangers! We don't quit, we don't surrender, and most importantly, WE DON'T LOSE!!!}}

{{quote| '''Doom:''' [''smiling''] I have seen enough horror in my life that I'm not impressed. I have walked the road through Hell itself. I have loved monsters and had my monstrosity loved in return. ''I am not afraid.''}}

{{quote| "I am Aayla Secura. {{spoiler|I have survived a brush with the Dark Side and recovered from losing all of my memories. I have leapt out of moving gunships and crossed chasms without bridges. I have escaped from Separatist facilities that were exploding all around me and come out without suffering a scratch. I have flown through space, blasting apart any droid that I find without prejudice. I have battled rancors, survived an assault from a swarm of Gigantoformicums and scared a bunch of pirates away from a farm by making them believe they were being attacked by a ghost. I have ridden Acklay into battle and even gone so far as to befriend them. I have destroyed Geonosian droid factories from within and faced off against zombies and Jedi infected with mind-controlling parasites. I have stood in the face of giant blasts from defoliator cannons and emerged unscathed. I have passed into the Palace of Jabba the Hutt and come out with my sanity intact. I have infiltrated an entire base of Dooku's Dark Acolytes to convert my Master back from the Dark Side and helped him to fight all of them off. I have assisted in diffusing an anti-matter bomb before it could destroy the whole of Naboo. I have fought off powerful ice monsters and run up and down on the back of the Zillo Beast – the most dangerous creature that has ever been born in this universe. I have defeated Asajj Ventress and Count Dooku, and I shall defeat you in just the same way.}}"}}

{{quote| "Tsunade-san," the Daimyo did not bother to argue with his samurai, "If I asked you, how long would it take you to incapacitate my guards and toss them outside?"<br />

"Assuming you didn't want them seriously injured?" she prompted, and the Land of Fire's ruler waved his hand in agreement. She looked around at the twenty, thickly muscled, well-armed, and heavily armored men. Then she shot the ranking warrior a smug grin.<br />

{{quote| Kross:'Fate. Destiny. Predestined. SHUT UP! My brother died in my arms today, and you tell me it was fate? [[Screw Destiny|I'll make my own fate in this world]]. You just declared war on the Nightroad clan.And this is war like any other. The last man alive wins! [[Determinator|And I won't rest]] [[Roaring Rampage of Revenge|until I track down and destroy every one of you]] [[Rage Against the Heavens|and then take the fight to your pathetic god!]] This is my declaration. MY DECLARATION OF WAR!!!" (lightning flash emphasizes the word war)<br />

Kross: [[One-Man Army|Fifty of you left, huh?]] At this rate, it'll take until dawn to crack all of your skulls. (cue [[Slasher Smile]]) }}

{{quote| '''Dr. Eggman''': A foolish choice, you stupid horse. Those who dare stand in my way will be destroyed. Now, be a good little horsy and back off!<br />

'''Twilight Sparkle''': First of all, I’m not a horse, I’m a pony. A unicorn to be exact. A very powerful unicorn who has defeated more powerful enemies with the help of my friends. Second, you terrorized Ponyville, attempted to harm innocent bystanders, and caused widespread destruction on our peaceful town. But the biggest mistake you made was destroying '''MY''' library. Now, I’m going to show you why getting a unicorn angry is a ''[[Oh Crap|very]]'' [[Oh Crap|bad idea!]] '' {{spoiler|Cue a Sonic Rainbooming ass kicking by Rainbow Dash.}}'' }}

{{quote| '''Watson:''' “If your master’s actions destroy him whom I regard as — as the ''best'' and ''wisest'' man I have ''ever'' known… make no mistake that I shall hunt down, to a man, ''everyone'' who played a part in his destruction.”}}

{{quote| "I'm The Doctor, and these (''MLP Mane Cast...[[And Zoidberg|and Zecora]]'') Are my friends. And we are going to stop you. Understood?"}}

{{quote| {{spoiler|'''Mimic'''}}: You float one inch towards [[Mama Bear|my daughters]], I'll kill you and seal your spirit in one of my horseshoes!}}