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{{quote|I think the papers are making the country a worse place to live, don't you feel like that? Just the unremitting horror of the Daily Express; they might as well get rid of news and just have every day, "DON'T GO OUTSIDE! It's full of [[Acceptable Targets|queers, blacks and crime]]! Oh if only Diana was here!" They're all the same: the Daily Mail, every day, "ASBOs, Muslims, speed camera, speed camera, ASBOs, Muslims, speed cameras..."; the Sun: "[[Pedo Hunt|Are you a paedo]]!? Are you a paedo!? [[Page Three Stunna|Have a bang at her tits]], [[Hypocritical Humor|16 today]], are you a paedo!?". The Independent, you try and read it, it's like it's grabbing you by the throat: ''"ARE YOU RECYCLING?!'' '''ARE YA'''?! ''YOU'VE JUST KILLED A POLAR BEAR'', '''YOU!'''". All the while, The Guardian's in the corner, fanning itself with a wall-chart: "You silly little things. Tell 'em, Telegraph."; "[[Cricket Rules|CRICKEET! CRICKEEET!]]" It's too much!|'''[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ago9ZzSvbPM Russell Howard]''', ''[[Mock the Week]]'' ([http://community.livejournal.com/ihasatardis/1923565.html now available] in ''[[Doctor Who (TV)|Doctor Who]]'' flavour)}}
{{quote|'''Hacker''': Don't tell me about the press. I know exactly who reads the papers. ''The Daily Mirror'' is read by people who think they run the country, ''The Guardian'' is read by people who think they ought to run the country, ''The Times'' is read by the people who actually do run the country, ''The Daily Mail'' is read by the wives of the people who run the country, The ''Financial Times'' is read by people who own the country, ''The Morning Star'' is read by people who think the country ought to be run by another country, and ''The Daily Telegraph'' is read by people who think it is.
'''Sir Humphrey''': Prime Minister, what about the people who read ''The Sun?''
'''Bernard''': ''Sun'' readers don't care who runs the country, as long as she's got big tits. |''[[Yes Minister]]''}}
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