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Line 5: She becomes [[She Hulk]]. Discussing some of the dialogue: {{quote\| '''He''': I'd like to do one more exercise, it's like role playing.~~<br />~~ '''Oancitizen!He''': Now, I'm going be a half-elf ranger. Here's a character sheet. Now, you can pick anything you want but don't pick half elf or ranger since we need to diversify our skill sets. The talking fox will be the DM. }} ** This couple has now made made [[Twilight (novel)\|Edward and Bella Cullen]] look like John and Abigail Adams. Line 12: * From his review of Pinocchio: His description of the World of Good Boys {{quote\| It's a world of finals clubs, insider trading, and ''mountains'' of cocaine. It will stay that way as long as you keep the coloreds out. ''(wink)'' [[The Social Network\|Now let me tell you about the Fuck Truck...]]}} A very clever [[Shout-Out]] during the last Blue Fairy scene: {{quote\| [[Marz Gurl\|Well, I'm off to Texas to review anime for a living.]]}} ** "When I die, I will be greeted at the gates of hell by a thin, hyperactive Italian man, who will say to me, 'I'm a fish, gloog gloog.'" * From his review of ''[[Anatomy of Hell]]'': After hearing the woman's excuse for attempted suicide ("Because I'm a woman"), he exemplifies how flimsy the gendered excuse is: {{quote\| Jeez, man, that's the third time you've ordered pizza this week! why do you keep doing that?~~<br />~~ BECAUSE I'M A MAN! (continues to nom on pizza) }} "Would a club catering to homosexual men even HAVE a ladies' restroom?" [[Romeo and Juliet\|"But soft, what light through yonder front porch breaks? It is the east, and the insecure, suicidally depressed misandrist is the overhead light they shine in your eyes when you go to get a cavity filled."]] "After all, [menstrual blood]'s the only bodily fluid with some kind of stigma attached to it." takes a sip of milk "My semen is watery today." * Just before that, when the tampon is first removed and held in front of The Man: "Those of you who ''aren't'' disgusted by this point...wait ten seconds." "Hi! I'm Jesus. Leave me out of this." Line 28: * Oancitizen considering it ludicrous that the protagonist of ''[[Perfume]]'' could enrapture people so heavily through scent alone... at least, until he considers [[The Man Your Man Could Smell Like\|Isaiah Mustafa]]. Kyle explaining the basis of the character Jean-Baptiste Grenouille<ref>Yes, he's a Frenchman with the last name 'Frog'. Go with it.</ref> {{quote\| '''Kyle:''' In Süskind's novel, this is the key to his alienation: Jean-Baptiste Grenouille's sensory input cripples his emotional output, and so we see-~~<br />~~ ''[[Super Reflexes\|Jean-Baptiste dodges an apple thrown at him... from behind.]]''<br /> '''Kyle:''' [''astounded''] Oh my God he's [[Daredevil]]! }} Movie is explaining that protagonist will not only prove he's someone but prove he's exceptional. Cut to Oancitizen, [[Awesome Moment\|singing]]: {{quote\| "[[Aladdin (Disney film)\|Riff raff, street rat, I don't buy that!]]"}} Lampshading the protagonist's being a walking [[Mentor Occupational Hazard]] by saying this about [[It Makes Sense in Context\|leaving a cave]]: The cave was later shot in the stalactites during a 3 a.m. drug store robbery. "Oh bite me [[Les Misérables (theatre)\|Eponine]]!" Line 43: * Probably the two funniest songs sung in this sequence are "500 Miles" by The Proclaimers, and then Oan ends it all with [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nBdKlNsuPd4 his own theme song.] * Even better-as he ends the joke, he ''loses his patience and screams in frustration.'' {{quote\| '''''They're still going!'''''}} The fake movie trailer: "This summer. '''Damon.''' '''In.''' ''[[The Bourne Identity\|The Bourne]] [[Leave the Camera Running\|Monotony]]'', Rated PG-13." [[Obscurus Lupa]] appears at the start and just stares at him. She warns him off the movie, but is driven away by his condescension. {{quote\| '''Oan:''' [sad] Lupa doesn't like me. [[Mood Whiplash\|Anyway]], lets look at ''Gerry''.}} ** After a three-minute shot just following a car, it starts to sink in: {{quote\| '''Oan:''' Lupa...? Please come back?}} * From his review of ''[[Shortbus]]'', the description of the "Sex Not Bombs" room: {{quote\| '''Oancitizen''': She's watching numerous people engage in simultaneously pleasurable experiences of a sexual nature.~~<br />~~ '''[[Memetic Mutation\|O RLY? Owl]]''': O RGY?<br /> '''Oancitizen''': YA RGY! }} Line 69: "Sir [[Sean Connery]], [[Handsome Lech\|Lover]], Fighter, [[Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking\|MIME!]]" Sean Connery is looking for answers: {{quote\| '''Zed:''' I want the truth! ~~<br />~~ '''Oan:''' [[You Can't Handle the Parody\|The truth is something you cannot handle!]] [beat] I screwed it up. Shit! }} The end of the review: {{spoiler\|"How did I miss!?"}} His reaction to [[The Reveal]] that Zed's religion was based on ''[[The Wizard of Oz]]'', after listing off increasingly obscure religions and philosophers. {{quote\| '''Kyle:''' The Wizard of... oh, wait- OH! OW!~~<br />~~ '''Zed:''' The Wizard of Oz. Zardoz.~~<br />~~ '''Kyle:''' AAAAUGH! ~~<br />~~ '''Zed:''' The Wizard of Oz was a fairy story about an old man that frightened people with a loud voice and big mask.~~<br />~~ '''Kyle:''' [[Go Mad ~~From~~from the Revelation\|Sean Connery is Dorothy! SEAN CONNERY IS DOROTHY!]] }} * From [[We Are the Strange]]: Calling it [[Scott Pilgrim vs. the World\|Scott Pilgrim vs. Rational Thinking]] His interpretation of eMMM's charades: {{quote\| "Take this quarter, feed it to me, then do the monkey. That way we can stomp grapes and make wine."}} Every time he calls back to the notes Roo of the [[Clan of the Gray Wolf]] took for him. He brings up how the movie took cue from two styles of anime. The calm kind (showing a calm scene from [[Spirited Away]]) and the "what-the-fuck" kind (showing a scene from Garzeys Wing). Line 91: The opening, where he reads a book called "Feminism & Pornography"... and then {{spoiler\|turns it on the side like he's actually reading a porn magazine}}. This bit from the beginning: {{quote\| "It's a terrible stereotype that the French are much hornier than other nations..."~~<br />~~ Picture of [[Benzaie]]~~<br />~~ "...but it's a stereotype that has some basis in fact..."~~<br />~~ Picture of [[Benzaie]]~~<br />~~ "...French culture is quite open when it comes to sexuality..."~~<br />~~ Picture of [[Benzaie]]~~<br />~~ "...they're famously blase when it comes to talking about sex and are more willing to discuss taboos..."~~<br />~~ Picture of [[Benzaie]]~~<br />~~ "...at least compared to most Americans."~~<br />~~ Picture of Oancitizen }} ** "[[True Art Is Incomprehensible\|If you can guess what any of that means]], please send your answers to [[Bilingual Bonus\|merdedutaureau]]@gmail.fr for a chance to win a prize. Line 105: * Near the opening of his review of ''[[Sweet Movie]]'': "She said '[[Triumph of the Will]]'. We're barely into the first act and we've already gone full [[Godwin's Law\|Godwin]]." Later, {{quote\| '''Oancitizen:''' "Then [[True Art Is Incomprehensible\|an OBGYN unicycles into the room]] and...[[A Rare Sentence\|I just said that sentence out loud, didn't I]]?"}} Oancitizen ''losing his shit'' when the movie decides to show [[Stock Footage]] ''of [[wikipedia:Katyn massacre\|a Soviet atrocity]].'' {{quote\| '''Oancitizen:''' look of rapidly growing madness "''[[Cannibal Holocaust]]'' [[Even Evil Has Standards\|DIDN'T USE REAL BODIES-"]] cut to [[We Are Experiencing Technical Difficulties]] screen}} During a particularly bizarre scene of a naked man acting like a baby while a clothed man straddles him and attempts to do...something, Oancitizen decides to cut to "something more pleasant". Cue footage from {{spoiler\|''[[Battlefield Earth (film)\|Battlefield Earth]]''.}} His rant at the end towards the other members of That Guy With The Glasses for being sheltered: {{quote\| [[The Nostalgia Critic\|You]]! ''The Garbage Pail Kids Movie''? At least the vomit was ''fake''! [[The Nostalgia Chick\|You!]] ''Showgirls''? At least the sex scenes were ''funny''! [[Obscurus Lupa\|You]]! ''Pocket Ninjas''? Robert Z'Dar never got naked in front of those kids! [[Rollo T\|All]] [[Todd in the Shadows\|of]] [[Desu Des Brigade\|you]]! ''The Last Airbender''? Shyamalan didn't intercut his battle scenes with ''actual'' war footage! [[The Cinema Snob\|You]]! ''E.T. the Porno''? ...well, you've got me there.}} * When witnessing the appearance of some [[Uncanny Valley]] animals in his review of "Alice"; he pauses, takes a sip of Listerine, spits it out, then [[Screams Like a Little Girl]]. * The opening speech to "9 Songs" ** The fanfare when he finally finds a parallel between the sex scenes and the boyfriend being a glaciologist. * His cameos for other characters can apply as well: ** His measured, well-researched attempt to explain pirates to Sad Panda on "Forget About It: Pirates of the Caribbean." {{quote\| '''Sad Panda:''' Neckties are lame.~~<br />~~ '''Oancitizen:''' looks at tie: Aww... }} His contribution to [[Atop the Fourth Wall]]'s [["Previously On..."]] segment for "Rise of Arsenal." Line 133: "'Cause heeeeeere is a movie with [[Aesop\|a message]]. Soooorry that it's theeeeere. But it has some nudes, so if that does it for you..." * Unfortunately, the first sex scenes we see involve Rip Torn. Subtitle: "...I'm so sorry." {{quote\| '''Woman:''' You know, you're not at all like my father.~~<br />~~ '''Oancitizen:''' ''(to the tune of "Fame")'' Pain. }} When Thomas spaces out while seeing members of his race, Mary-Lou calls out to him. "Tommy? Tommy?" Oancitizen sings [[Tommy\|"Tommy, Can You Hear Me?"]] for a few bars before realizing his mistake<ref>"Can You Hear Me" is completely different</ref> and abandoning it. Line 139: * ''Trash Humpers'': '''PRETENSION NIRVANA''' He expects one of them to start a [[~~Red Letter Media~~RedLetterMedia\|90 minute]] ''[[Star Wars]]'' review. "OH MY GOD! WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOUR FACE!" * Later on, when a slurring old man appears, he says that he wasted the Mr. Plinkett joke. When he sees a man tell a blatantly homobphobic "joke" that has no real punchline, he tells a "joke" in a similar style that mocks the movie. {{quote\| So this idiot made a movie about people that society rightly rejected on an old VHS camera, and he sold it, and people think he's some sort of visionary.}} "So, these guys are like Henry David Thoreau crossed with [[The Joker]]... I would've guessed they were [[Arrested Development (TV series)\|the Bluths]] crossed with the Progeria Support Group, but whatever." [[Civilization\|OUR WORDS ARE BACKED WITH NUCLEAR WEAPONS!]] Line 193: * From ''Goodbye Twentieth Century'': "Also, [[Mortal Kombat\|Kano]] found Jesus." '''CHRISTIANITY''' Everything about the funeral scene. EVERYTHING. From the Steve Jobs joke (complete with victory pose and [[Too Soon]] disclaimer) to the EPIC [[~~Big~~Non ~~Lipped~~Sequitur ~~Alligator Moment~~Scene]] that occurs shortly afterwards. The utterly dumbfounded look on Kyle's face doesn't even begin to describe it. ** Kyle's [["Not Making This Up" Disclaimer]] about when he saw the film for the first time. {{quote\| "True story: when I first saw this film, I tweeted what I saw, and someone on Twitter responded, 'Are you reading aloud from a [[Troll Fic]]?'"}} * Kyle's video of the New York Comic Con, done in character of Oancitizien and featuring him dancing to "My Humps" with [[The Nostalgia Chick\|Team NChick]], [[Todd in the Shadows]], and [[Desu Des Brigade\|JesuOtaku]]. {{quote\| "What am I doing with my hips?!"}} * The Dork Ages: My Eighth Grade History Project (done in the style of Pop-up Video) {{quote\| I think this girl agreed to help me with this project out of pity.~~<br />~~ She has since gone on to found a non-profit organization that supports girl's soccer in South Africa.~~<br />~~ I have since gone on to squirt corn syrup up my nose, hump a trash can and scream "fuck" on the internet.~~<br />~~ I have made good life decisions. }} * ''[[Ghost Dog: The Way of The Samurai]]'' Mistaking hip hop producer RZA for "Royal Zoological Administration". "You know me, I'm [[The Rap Critic]]!" {{quote\| '''Oan:''' Oh, right, yes. And what do you do? ~~<br />~~ '''Rap Critic:''' [stares] }} [[Pass the Popcorn\|whilst eating a bowl of popcorn]]: "Holy sh- this is still art, right?" Condensing his analysis of the film into rap over an instrumental of Wu-Tang Clan's "C.R.E.A.M.". ** "Which is totally an apt analogy, and not just a lame excuse to name-drop Monet like the stuck-up douche that I am." * A bit of an older review, but ''The Discovery of Heaven'' has a few of these. "[[Title Drop\|And we have a title!]]" Line 217: "Heaven falls into panic because... an actual discovery of Heaven may restore faith in God... [[Fridge Logic\|Which they don't want for some reason]]... This might have been better explained in the book." The running gag of showing [[Stephen Fry\|Stephen Fry's]] Twitter page was already great, but the best use of it has to be: {{quote\| How did you know I was in Rome?~~<br />~~ (Cut to Twitter page) ZOMG I found a gelato place with a view of the Colosseum! Rome {{=}} win!] }} Oancitizen [[QI\|getting the klaxon.]] * It's a more somber piece, but his review of ''[[Angels in America]]'' has him declaring the end of "Millennium Approaches" to best the "Best. Cliffhanger. EVER." It then cuts to the cliffhanger of "[[Star Trek: The Next Generation\|The Best of Both Worlds, Part I.]]" {{quote\| ''Better than that.'' Pfft. Nerds. }} * From Shakespeare, Film, and Kenneth Branagh, - A Retrospective: "It says I'm supposed to poison him? That's boring-EAT CHANDELIER, BITCH!" "IT SURE AS HELL WASN'T SPAIN!" "Oh, my God, [[Emma Thompson]], be my bride! Oh, excuse me..." Line 230: {{reflist}} [[Category:Web Original/Funny]] [[Category:Brows Held High]]▼ [[Category:Funny]] [[Category:That Guy With The Glasses/Funny]] ▲[[Category:~~Brows Held High~~{{TOPLEVELPAGE}}]]