Don't Call Me "Sir"!: Difference between revisions
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{{trope}}
[[File:
{{quote|'''Peppermint Patty:''' Before we go, kid, I want to ask you something. How come you're always calling me "sir" when I keep asking you not to, huh? Don't you realize how annoying that can be?
'''Marcie:''' No, ma'am!
{{quote|'''Rocko:''' Don't call me Sir. Call me Rocko.
|'''''[[The Pebble and the Penguin]]'''''}}
A character is in a position of high authority or status, and as a part of this, is owed respect and even obeisance from those considered beneath him.
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If this character is very powerful, such as a king, he will often try to change the behaviours of those around him or abolish denigrating practices. Whether this works generally depends on the kindness of the setting.
This trope also pops up in works that involve the military whenever a non-commissioned officer (usually a [[Drill Sergeant Nasty|Sergeant]]) is referred to as "sir" as the title is typically reserved for commissioned officers. The stock response from the NCO is "Don't call me Sir, [[Take That|I work for a living]]." Roughly 90% of the time this pops up it's when [[Drill Sergeant Nasty]] is introducing the [[New Meat|fresh-off-the-street recruits]] to their [[Training
A common way to play with this trope is to have one character [[Friendly Address Privileges|insist on being called by name]], but another character, usually a servant or similar role, agrees and continues using the title anyway, in the basic form of: "Don't call me Sir." "Yes, Sir." The two characters may argue about this throughout the story, and the eventual use of the first name by the subordinate character can be used so show the development of their relationship. (The [[Old Retainer]] hates it.)
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Compare/contrast [[Insistent Terminology]], [[First-Name Basis]], [[Last-Name Basis]], [[Friendly Address Privileges]]. See also [[Nice to the Waiter]].
{{examples}}
== [[Anime]] and [[Manga]] ==▼
▲== Anime and Manga ==
* Youko, the main character and eventual queen in ''[[The Twelve Kingdoms]]'', can't stand to see her courtiers and peasantry prostrate themselves before her, partly because it offends her sense of equality and because she fears the ministers are scowling while their faces are hidden. At the end of the series, she issues a proclamation that abolishes the custom.
* In ''[[Legend of the Galactic Heroes]]'', after Reinhard and Hilde {{spoiler|[[Unequal Pairing|get married]]}}, Reinhard tells her she can stop calling him "Kaiser" like everyone else and call him [[First-Name Basis|by his first name]], with mixed results.
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* [[Ordinary High School Student|Yuuri]] of ''[[Kyou Kara Maou]]'' repeatedly asks characters, especially Conrad, to address him as Yuuri rather than the kingly title of 'Your Majesty'.
== [[Comic Books]] ==
* Cyclops of the [[X-Men (Comic Book)|X-Men]] just can't call Professor Xavier anything other than his title and surname, even when the Professor asks him to call him "Charles".
* [[Canon Immigrant|Originating]] from [[The Adventures of Superman|the first television show]], this trope is a standard of Silver Age [[Superman]] comics, with Jimmy Olsen calling Perry White "Chief," prompting Perry to say, "Don't call me 'Chief!'"
* In the lead-up promotional comic for the Engineer Update in ''[[Team Fortress 2]]'', the BLU Engineer's real name is revealed in such a conversation.
{{quote|
== [[Fan
* In the ''[[
* In ''[[Harry Potter and
▲* In the [[Mai-HiME]] fanfic Windows of the Soul, Natsuki tries to get Hideko, one of Shizuru's maids, to call her by her first name instead of "Kuga-sama," but Hideko refuses, calling her "Kuga-san" as a compromise.
* From the shared-world [[Mega Crossover]] story ''[[My Apartment Manager is not an Isekai Character]]'':
▲* In [[Harry Potter and The Methods of Rationality]] Dumbledore tells Harry that Headmaster is to formal he can call him 'Heh' for short. He is both surprised and pleased when when Harry does.
{{quote|'''Harley Waters''': Young lady, 'Mr. Waters' is my father. Call me Harley.}}
== Film ==▼
▲== [[Film]] ==
* At the end of ''[[The King and I]]'', when the king's son ascends the throne, the very first thing he does is start telling people to stand up and look him in the eye.
* [[God]] himself does this in ''[[Monty Python and
* In ''[[Stripes]]'', Sergeant Hulka uses the "Don't call me sir, I work for a living!" line on a new-recruit.
* In ''[[Forrest Gump]]'', Forrest's platoon leader in Vietnam immediately forbids him to salute him or show any forms of respect in the field because the enemy snipers would specifically target the commanding officers.
** Truth in television; a salute on the battlefield is called a "Sniper Check" in military jargon. This is now official policy for deployed U.S. military forces in some areas.
* The 'I work for a living' part is also in ''[[Good Morning, Vietnam]]'', followed by a line meant to set up another one-liner from [[Robin Williams]].
* In ''[[The American President]]'', President Andrew Shepherd tells his Chief of Staff, A.J., that he can call him by his first name when they're alone together. A.J. replies, "Whatever you say, Mister President."
* ''[[A New Hope
* The US Intelligence representative from ''[[Transformers (film)|Transformers
* In the 1986 movie ''[[Saving Grace]]'' the new Pope Leo XIV wants his closest aides to ''please'' call him something other than 'Your Holiness' all the time. Though he does say 'Your Not-So-Muchness' is "Too long."
* In one of the ''[[Porky's]]'' movies, Coach Brackett asks the other characters to quit calling him "Coach" and address him as Roy. "I'm only twenty-three, for Christ's sake."
* [[Colonel Kilgore]] in ''[[Apocalypse Now]]''.
{{quote|
* ''[[Barb Wire]]'': Let's just say that "Babe" will be the absolute last word ever to be heard from you.
== Literature ==▼
▲== [[Literature]] ==
* Each of the three main male characters in ''[[The Wheel of Time]]'', being from a small village, are immensely weirded out when fate hands them a set of nice clothes and suddenly everyone is bowing and saying "my lord." They handle it quite differently: Perrin struggles with the ethics of lordhood whilst tentatively allowing the practice to continue; Rand gets an inflated head and decides it's all his due (not helped by everyone proclaiming him the [[Chosen One]] of every prophecy out there it seems); and Mat continues to struggle in vain to make it stop.
* In ''Sanctuary'' (book three of the ''[[Dragon Jousters]]'' series by [[Mercedes Lackey]]), Kaleth has to scold the Tian priests at least twice for prostrating themselves to him. Not that you can really blame them, as each time Kaleth had been possessed by one of the Altan/Tian pantheon to pass messages on ....
* ''[[Discworld]]'':
** Played with (like everything else)
** Another Discworld example is in ''[[
** Sam Vimes acts like a variant of this trope after being knighted - he hates being treated like a nobleman in any way, since he is disgusted by the usual behavior of Ankh-Morpork's nobles, and he also still completely feels like a 'normal' citizen.
*** Eventually he becomes comfortable enough with it that most people who don't know him call him Sir Samuel. Admittedly, he's a ''Duke'' by this point, and he objects to "your Grace".
** Corporal Strappi has the "I'm not a sir, I'm a bloody corporal!" version in ''[[
** In ''[[
* How about Jake from ''[[Animorphs]]''? Ax is always calling him Prince (a rank, rather than royal title). Leading to:
{{quote|
'''Jake:''' "Don't call me Prince."
'''Ax:''' "Yes, Prince Jake." }}
** Amusingly enough, when Ax first is getting used to living with the rest of the crew, he does this because military command and structure is drilled into the entirety of Andalite society, but as time progresses, it's hinted that he keeps doing it because he knows it annoys Jake, and finds it funny.
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* Sandor Clegane of ''[[A Song of Ice and Fire]]'' doesn't technically have the rank anyway, but he functions as a knight in everything but name, and as such, other knights and courtiers often address him as "ser". [[Berserk Button|He hates it]]. Direct use of the trope name occurs when Sansa makes this mistake and he snaps, "Don't call me ''ser''."
* In his autobiography ''About Face'' David Hackworth mentions how he reluctantly accepted a [[Field Promotion]] up to officer rank during the Korean War. He gets into a truck and is addressed as "sir" by the driver.
{{quote|
'''Driver:''' "Yes sir." }}
* The ''[[Belgariad
* In ''[[Percy Jackson & the
* ''[[Honor Harrington]]'':
** From ''Crown of Slaves'', {{spoiler|Berry Zilwicki, upon becoming queen of Torch}} find the formalities associated with monarchy to be tremendously awkward, and comments that she foresees establishing the most informal monarchy in history. She prefers to be on a first name basis with people, which is convenient given that many of her future subjects {{spoiler|are from the Audubon Ballroom, and thus have no last names.}}
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** Kurtz eschews the use of the word "sir" — as well as the use of ranks, rank insignia, rates, ''[[Gratuitous Latin|et cetera]]'' — because the nature of the operation he's commanding requires that he and his subordinates do so. If the military personnel involved in the "cleanup" were to be identified as such, they would be in direct violation of federal law — specifically, the ''Posse Comitatus'' Act of 1878 (18 U.S.C. §1385), which forbids the United States military from carrying out operations against civilians within the United States. It's more [[Loophole Abuse|exploiting a legal loophole]] than a personal preference.
* Arises between Bunter and [[Lord Peter Wimsey]] in Jill Paton Walsh's ''The Attenbury Emeralds''. After {{spoiler|Lord Peter's elder brother the Duke of Denver dies without surviving issue}}, Bunter uses Wimsey's newly-inherited form of address, and Wimsey tries to get him to use his first name, at least in connection with their investigation work. [[Old Retainer|Bunter settles for returning to "My Lord"/"Your Lordship"]], which he'd been using for years. Despite Wimsey's and Harriet's efforts to the contrary, Bunter generally tries to resist the more egalitarian spirit of post-WWII Britain, even discouraging his son Peter Bunter ("PB") from seeing himself the equal of his schoolmate Bredon Wimsey.
* [[Inverted Trope|Inverted]] in ''[[A Series of Unfortunate Events]]'', in the miserable mill. The boss insists that everyone call him Sir, to the point where neither we nor the protagonists know his name.
* Michael from the ''[[Knight and Rogue Series]]'' insists Fisk just call him by his name, while Fisk only refers to him as Sir or Noble Sir (though he does use Sir Michael in monologue). Michael admits to the audience that he'd be willing, at least for a while, to just settle for Sir, since Fisk means Noble Sir as an insult.
** Of course when Fisk starts calling Michael 'Mike' on occasion that isn't appreciated either.
* An inversion occurs during [[Harry Potter (novel)|Harry Potter]]'s Occlumency lessons in ''[[Harry Potter and
** In ''Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince'' Snape again insists on being called 'sir' and he chastises Harry for not doing so. This leads to Harry's famous riposte 'There's no need to call me "sir", Professor.'
== [[Live-Action TV]] ==
* Played a bit for laughs in ''[[The West Wing]]'' with Donna Moss and incoming First Lady Helen Santos.
{{quote|
'''Donna''': I seem to have, yes.
'''Helen''': ''(cheerfully)'' Yeah, don't do that again. }}
* The Doctor on ''[[Doctor Who]]''. It's usually a sign of great distress when he doesn't mind people calling him ''sir''.
** The [[The Nth Doctor|Tenth Doctor]] also dislikes being saluted. The only reason he lets the UNIT commander of the episode do it is because they seem to get a buzz out of it.
* Captain Janeway of ''[[Star Trek:
** It should be noted that ''[[Star Trek: The Next Generation]]'' had Starfleet officers of superior rank addressed as "sir" regardless of their gender; presumably the idea was that the patriarchic meaning of this word had changed over the centuries to being a form of address for anyone of higher status.
** ''[[Star Trek: The
** Chief O'Brien on ''[[Star Trek: Deep Space Nine]]'' was like this as well; in fact, in one episode, a dying ensign noted that his situation had to be getting worse because O'Brien didn't correct him about calling him "sir". That said, O'Brien is not a Starfleet Officer, he's an enlisted man. Which lead to the fact that following the strict chain of command, Nog who is a cadet with a battlefield promotion to Ensign outranks him. He follows the standard tradition of using ranks as titles though, and he's laid back enough about it to claim that he did so so he wouldn't have to wear fancy uniforms and go to boring meetings.
{{quote|
* In ''[[NCIS]]'', Gibbs insists upon being called "Boss" instead.
** Abby, being Abby, played with it.<ref>She is the ''only'' person in the entire show who can get away with this kind of thing and not get [[Dope Slap|Gibbs slapped]] for it.</ref>
{{quote|
'''Gibbs:''' Don't call me sir.
'''Abby:''' Yes, ma'am!
(''amused reaction from Gibbs'') }}
** And if you call Ziva "ma'am"... whoops.
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* Sandor Clegane of ''[[Game of Thrones]]'' doesn't like being called "ser". Unlike many examples, it's actually incorrect, as he is not a knight (though many assume he is, what with being the personal bodyguard of the Crown Prince). Beyond that, Sandor doesn't think much of knights - after all, [[Complete Monster|his brother]] is one.
* On ''[[CSI: NY]]'', Danny uses this to play a joke on his (unknown to them at the time of course)future wife in her first episode. On Lindsay's first day on the job, Danny tells her Mac likes to be called "sir". She proceeds to do so, and then Mac tells her not to call him "sir".
* ''[[The Palace]]'' is all about a fictional [[British Royal Family]], and the main characters are all comfortable being called by their titles. However, this trope is briefly [[Played for Drama]] in the first episode, shortly after King James's sudden death. His eldest son, Richard, enters a room where his immediate family is gathered, and his mother and sisters begin to curtsy and greet him with "Your Majesty." The new king immediately stops them, disturbed.
* ''[[Lois and Clark]]'': In "The Phoenix", [[Lex Luthor]] told Nigel not to call him "Sir" anymore since he no longer had a facade to keep.
== [[Newspaper Comics]] ==
* The [[Trope Namer]] comes from ''[[Peanuts]]''. Peppermint Patty hates it when Marcie calls her "Sir".
** Of course, that's probably due more to the "gender confusion" angle than the "unwanted deference" one. And since Marcie has [[Nerd Glasses]] as she's otherwise pretty much blind, it's understandable for her to be confused by the [[Tomboy]] Patty.
*** At least, for a while. Later Marcie's pretty certain what gender Patty is; she just keeps doing it, likely from a combo of deference, habit, and orneriness.
== [[Tabletop Games]] ==
* Played with in the Role Aides game supplement ''Dragons'', which features a character class of dragon-mounted warriors. Among humans of the Dragonlands, they're to be addressed as "Dragonlord" and treated with extreme deference. In front of actual dragons, who are ''really'' the ones in charge, they can only be called "Riders", '''never''' "Dragonlords", and it's the dragons who must be accorded every respect.
== [[Video Games]] ==▼
▲== Video Games ==
* Robo in ''[[Chrono Trigger]]'' initially refers to Marle and Lucca by honorific, presumably because he's programmed to do so, then reverts to [[First-Name Basis]] at their insistence.
* ''[[Jedi Academy]]'': Kyle Katarn insists that both [[Player Character|Jaden]] and Rosh call him Kyle instead of Master, as he says that titles "make my skin crawl." Rosh tries to adapt to this and starts acting so relaxed he's soon found literally leaning on Kyle, which he doesn't appreciate either. [[Sarcasm Mode|There's just no pleasing some people.]]
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** By the [[Fate of the Jedi]] books taking place decades later, Kyle actually insists on being called "Master Katarn". This may be related to the fact that he's on the Jedi Council...
* This conversation from ''[[Ratchet and Clank]]'':
{{quote|
'''Ratchet:''' Oh, sorry. By the way, you can stop calling me 'sir'. The name's Ratchet.
'''Clank:''' Pleased to make your acquaintance, sir. }}
* In ''[[Mass Effect]] 2'', Kal'Reegar calls Tali "ma'am." When she tells him to call her by her name, he replies, "I'll work on that, ma'am."
** Shepard can choose to encourage this kind of mentality among the crew of the Normandy.
* Big Boss gains his title at the end of ''[[Metal Gear Solid 3: Snake Eater]]''. However, due to how he gained it, he refuses to let anyone else refer to him as such until the end of ''[[Metal Gear Solid: Portable Ops]]'', six years later.
** He's not even comfortable with it then. It's only at the end of ''[[Metal Gear Solid Peace Walker]]'' that he truly embraces the title.
* In ''[[Call of Duty]] 3'', Dixon insists on the squad not calling him Sergeant after he's promoted to the rank.
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** Also, Blaze the Cat dislikes being called Highness. She tolerates "Princess Blaze".
* [[Drill Sergeant Nasty]] Sergeant Dornan in ''[[Fallout 2]]'' explodes when the Chosen One addresses him as "sir."
{{quote|
* In ''[[Tsukihime]]'', Shiki tries to get the twin [[Meido]] to stop calling him [[Japanese Honorifics|"sama"]]. Kohaku complies, Hisui doesn't.
* Shirou of ''[[Fate/stay night|Fate Stay Night]]'' tells Saber not to call him "master", and she complies.
* In the ''[[Warcraft]]'' universe, Tyrande to Shandris around the time she becomes High Priestess.
{{quote|
'''Tyrande''': "Don't call me that, I'm still Tyrande."
'''Shandris''': "Yes, my lady" }}
* Used in the opening of ''[[Battlefield: Bad Company]]'':
{{quote|
== [[Web Comics]] ==▼
▲== Web Comics ==
▲* In ''[[The Order of the Stick|Order of the Stick]]'', Roy said this to Vaarsuvius at least once.
* ''[[But I'm a Cat Person]]'''s Bianca doesn't like to think of her ownership of Patrick as anything but a technicality. He insists on calling her "Master" anyway.
== [[Web Original]] ==
* The [[SCP Foundation]] has [http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-662 SCP
== [[Western
▲* The [[SCP Foundation]] has [http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-662 SCP 662], a bell that summons a butler named Mr. Deeds. Mr. Deeds calls everyone sir, often leading to this trope. Unlike most examples, however, he promptly ceases this [http://www.scp-wiki.net/662-l1 when asked politely].
* Sgt. Torres delivers "I work for a living" line in ''[[Exo Squad]]'', when an group of exoscouts she just rescued tries to address her with "Ma'am".
* Ratchet in ''[[Transformers Animated]]'':
{{quote|
'''Arcee:''' "Ar... Arcee, sir."
'''Ratchet:''' "Don't call me sir. I work for a living." }}
* Professor Selesnev of ''[[The Mystery of the Third Planet]]'' prefers to be called "Professor" rather than "Captain" and corrects people several times over it.
* In ''[[Beast Wars]]'', Megatron, the [[Big Bad]], is constantly referred to by Inferno, a soldier with a worker ant beast mode, as "The ''Queen''". Megatron is suitably angry with this term, and attempts to force Inferno to stop using it. Eventually Inferno settles on "The Royalty".
* ''[[My Little Pony:
== [[Real Life]] ==
*
** What a woman in the office of US president will be called is still a bit unsettled - "Miss/Mrs. President", "Ms. President", and "Madam President" (as most international presidents would be called) were all batted about during Hillary Clinton's campaign. Probably it will all come down to the personal preference of the first woman actually elected.
** The Polish president is also addressed as "Mr. President" ("Panie Prezydencie").
* In many English speaking military organizations, sergeants and petty officers will take offense at being called "sir" (the title being reserved for commissioned officers. "Don't call me "sir"! I work for a living!" is the common sergeant's rebuff). An exception is the United States Air Force, where airmen call anyone who outranks them "sir" ([[Interservice Rivalry|and leads to jokes from the other branches about how no one in the Air Force actually works anyway]].)
* Irish musician Tommy Makem used to reply "my father's not here" whenever anyone called him "Mr. Makem" instead of "Tommy".
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{{reflist}}
[[Category:{{PAGENAME}}]]
[[Category:Naming Conventions]]
[[Category:Language Tropes]]
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