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How to Become a Love Interest: Difference between revisions
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'''Females:'''
# Be the [[First Girl Wins|first one]] at the entrance when he comes in. (If someone else got there first, you can always [[Last Girl Wins|try waiting til the end]].)
# [[Alias (TV series)|Dye]] your hair [[Heroes Want Redheads|red]].
# If he's an American, become a [[All Guys Want Cheerleaders|cheerleader]].
# Don't settle for a simple greeting; make your first meeting with him [[Meet Cute|extremely convoluted or sappy]] to prove that only fate could have thrown you two together. The [[Crash Into Hello]] meeting is especially popular.
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# Tell him you [[Childhood Marriage Promise|promised to marry him]] when you were five. This always, always, ''always'' works, just so long as he doesn't find out you're lying or remember that when he was five, he was [[Girls Have Cooties|afraid of girls]]. If he does, however, you [[Unlucky Childhood Friend|instantly lose it all]].
# If he's a manly man with rippling biceps, become the [[Distressed Damsel]] to be [[Rescue Romance|swept up]] into his arms.
# Failing that, be a [[Doom Magnet]], and find a man who is equally one himself. You'll [[Battle Couple|bond together for safety alone]], even if you don't consider him your truest love. [[Be a Whore
# Somehow bribe the gods into [[Cleaning Up Romantic Loose Ends|removing all competition]], leaving you as their sole choice.
# [[Beautiful All Along|Get contacts and let your hair down]].
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# [[Love At First Note|Sing]].
# Secretly be male. A [[Wholesome Crossdresser]] never fails to get some important guys after shim.
# Of course [[Sweet
# If all else fails, [[Rape Is Love|force yourself]] onto him. It'll give you something to [[Rape Is Ok When It Is Female On Male|laugh about]] afterwards! {{color|red|'''Warning:''' If you're in real life, doing this will at least screw up your karma and at most get you a life sentence or on-site death.}}
# ...this may sound outrageous but.....if he happens to be [[Soul Brotha|black]], [[Where Da White Women At?|be white. Just...be white]] Seriously, this works way more often than it sounds.
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** [[Bald Black Leader Guy|Or, shave your head and just be really, really cool]].
** Lose the [[Uncle Tomfoolery]].
** Become [[Barack Obama|President of]] [[
** Become [[Blazing Saddles|the new Sheriff of Rock Ridge]]. Though, some folks might need to get used to you.
*** If you do go this route, and all else fails, just offer to prove to them that [[Biggus Dickus|the rumors are, in fact, true]].
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