Narm/Music: Difference between revisions

[[File:vanilla2_7389.jpg|link=Vanilla Ice|frame|[[It Makes Sense in Context]]]]

 

* Ferlin Husky's [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0upSvpjDdd4 "Drunken Driver"] retired the Country Narm Cup way back in 1954. Granted, it gets points for being ahead of its time on the subject matter, but...uh...yeah. Don't miss the legendary closing line.

** Its spirit lives on in Red Sovine's Narmtacular [http://craplister.blogspot.com/2008/03/red-sovine-im-only-17.html "I'm Only 17."]

* Lee Greenwood's "God Bless the USA." Narm ''and'' jingoism. Yay!

{{quote|"'Cause the flag still stands for freedom

* Much of Lonestar's repertoire from "Amazed" onward. They were basically doing 10 years ago what Rascal Flatts is doing now: lightweight, formulaic [[Power Ballad]] fluff with ridiculously over-the-top vocals and bombastic production — however, they sang about family and home instead of love, and Richie McDonald's voice was far less whiny. Witness such gems as "There's a carrot top who can barely walk / With a sippy cup of milk" in "My Front Porch Looking In", or the big one, "Them dang ol' hills will get you every time" in "Mountains". The latter line is particularly narmy, as the rest of the song isn't that bad. (If they didn't want to say "damn" in a song, why not just "You know those hills will get you every time"?)

** McDonald left the band for a solo career, and continued to do the same thing he was doing in Lonestar. One of his first solo singles was titled "Six-Foot Teddy Bear".

** Vandalism as retribution for a crime that ''she has no evidence he committed!'' Even the singer herself isn't sure; she keeps saying, "He's probably (insert PG-13-rated infidelity here)" and presents no hard evidence that he did anything wrong to begin with.

** "Jesus, Take the Wheel." It's a story song: the narrator loses control of her car on a patch of ice and asks Jesus to steer for a minute. It's Christmas Eve and her baby is in the back seat, making this really important. They're saved from certain death. She vows then and there to turn from her path of (unspecified) sin and let Jesus take the metaphorical wheel in all aspects of her life. Hey, the Lord does know to turn in the direction of the skid!

** Simple Plan songs in general. Parodied in this ''[http://xkcd.com/97/ XKCD]'' comic.

** That song is [[Refrain From Assuming|titled "Untitled."]] ''Nothing'' professionally published should be titled "Untitled." (Well, unless you are Cameron Crowe, and even then he had the good sense to ultimately give his "Untitled" [[Almost Famous|a title]].)

*** "Nooooouuu you dont know what is liiiiiiike to be like meeeeeeee" is probably one of the best lines to spontaneously laugh at while listening the radio.

* "Welcome to the Black Parade" by [[My Chemical Romance]] suffers from Narm and [[Memetic Mutation]] in the same way that "Untitled" does, particularly with the exploitable, fill-in-the-blank opening line, "When I was a young boy..."

** While we're on the subject of [[Panic! at the Disco]], "Northern Downpour" is an otherwise lovely song, but...the line "through playful lips made of yarn" is kinda incongruous...

* In "The End is the Beginning" by Forgive Durden, "Adakias," a.k.a. Thomas Dutton, shrieks "BROTHER NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" in a completely narmy fashion around the middle of the song.

{{quote|"I love youuu.. I'LL - LOVE - YOUUUUU! UNTIL MY LAST BREEEEEEEEAAAAAATH TAKES YOU FROM MEEEEEEE... [[Careful with That Axe|FROM - MEEEEE!]]"}}

* AFI's Love Like Winter would be a good song if it weren't for Davey Havok's poor, poor attempt to sound British...

* The entirety of Aiden's "Nightmare Anatomy" album is narmy. Just by listening to the first three songs, it becomes apparent that they like the word "nightmare" so much that it's in every single song even if it makes absolutely no sense in context. The fact that the "hidden track" on the album is the dictionary definition of "nightmare" doesn't help. Thinking about how fast one would become wasted if they made a drinking game out of the mention of the word "nightmare" makes the album all the more narmtastic.

{{quote|"We pass through like a NIGHTMAAAAAAREEEE fallliiiinnnggg doooowwwwwnnn."}}

*** It's called Lilting, and it's actually fairly common in Traditional Irish music, used in a similar way to scatting in Jazz. What most people miss out on, however, is that the next line is ''also'' gibberish, and originally went something like "whack foll the dally oh". Thin Lizzy changed this to "what for my Daddy-o" as a tongue in cheek "update", which walks a very fine line between badass and [[Jive Turkey]] from Phil Lynott, but tips significantly towards the latter when being sung by your average pasty Irishman.

*** Though Metallica's version is sometimes funny, since James is [[Large Ham|clearly enjoying himself]] at parts.

* [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=plyAklVxz8k "ANI-MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHLLLLL!!!!!!!"]

* A good majority of Korpiklaani's most popular songs - especially "Wooden Pints" when you add in the video.

*** Which is also odd, because Akerfeldt didn't even seem to go that low in pitch. For a growl, it's far higher pitched than in some Opeth songs (Blackwater Park, The Grand Conjuration).

** "Open your eyes Nicholas!" -girliest sounding man scream EVER-

{{quote|On and on and on and on it goes

Chauvinistic, selfish... [[Large Ham|COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLDDDD!!!!!]] }}

* Silent Call, a prog metal band, have the line "As darkness falls... [[Department of Redundancy Department|It's dark]]. And cold."

* [[Rammstein]]'s version of "Stripped", while not horrible, is narmy because of heavily accented English and "television" being pronounced "telly-vision". Well, okay, the latter is in the original; but "telly-vision" sounds more natural coming from [[Depeche Mode|Dave Gahan]] than it does from a deep-voiced scary German guy.

** Till Lindermann's deep, thickly-accented voice is pure Narm for some.

** The first minute or so of [[Incest Is Relative|Spiel Mit Mir]] is just unintetionally hilarious, especially the part where Till goes "Schaaaaaf" (meaning sheep, [[It Makes Sense in Context]] ). After that however, the song is just [[It Got Better|awesome]].

** From the album "Death magnetic" He have this gem of a lyric on the song "The Day that never comes"

{{quote|"LOVE IS A FOUR-LETTAH WORD!"}}

{{quote|'He's so sad this moment

He'sa lookin' for you,

*** [[Flat What|What]]

** They have a song with the lyrics 'Unholy Bloody Virgin Fuckers.'

** It doesn't exactly help that the song itself is a Post-Hardcore [[Cliché Storm]].

{{quote|"Everything in “Quest for Fire” is writ large, but doesn’t quite deserve to be. That disconnect places the song pretty high on the unintentional comedy scale."}}

** The funniest part is definitely "And the woooolves, they howled INTOOOOOOOOOO THE NIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT!!!!!!!!!" The over-the-top vocals make it priceless.

Under thy wings of sorrow. . ." }}

** Except Webster's dictionary gives it a secondary definition of "1. to deposit or conceal in a hiding place 2. to appropriate secretly: abstract - alteration of obsolete secret, from 'secret'." Perhaps another word would have been a clearer choice, but it's still the correct, albeit archaic, meaning.

* The folk metal band Elvenking, listen to [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EDvmQPK0Fh4 "Seasonspeech"] for instance. Here a male metal singer, a female singer, growls and a female operatic voice are mixed. Couple that with electric guitars, bass, drums and a violin.

* '''''[[Avenged Sevenfold|NIIIIIIIIIGHTMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA~RE]]'''''

Our hymn is gotten wet in the rain everyday.

That never reaches the sky. }}

* Deicide has some pretty weird videos. Their main gimmick is basically "God is dead." Their videos on the other hand are generally "comically sacrilegious." In one video, there's a priest being chased by zombies. No explanation as to why, they're just there. Another video was to a song about how "God is dead, nobody loves you" but the video is about a fat guy in a cartoony devil costume sneaking around a city doing such heinous acts as tripping old ladies and stealing from children.

* [[Slipknot]] can get narmy, especially in the way the lead singer does HARDCORE METAL GROWLS for the verses and then starts singing cleanly in the choruses...that is '''jarring'''. (Or awesome. A textbook case of [[Love It or Hate It]].)

{{quote|And the rain will kill us all

If we throw ourselves against the wall }}

* Static-X are capable of bringing the narm with a vengeance. Wayne Static has a vocal style that goes back and forth between a screechy wail and a seriously over-the-top, guttural growl. That in itself isn't necessarily narm. But then you have a song like "[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LJsQEaJUzIQ Love Dump,]" featuring lines like "I've always loved you, love dumpling / Your shit's like chocolate cake and your ass smells like a rose." All screamed at the top of his lungs.

 

* Many [[Sera Myu]] songs - they tend to be full of [[Gratuitous English]]. The choreography helps, too.

{{quote|''"All of you shall DIE! ...Dammit."''}}

{{quote|'''Bystander''': Say... ah you da one... everrybody's talkin' bowwt?

'''Mars''': Yesss... I am Sera Mars... They aw caw me frame snipah. Ah you weady? }}

You decide what's right, you decide what's good." }}

** Somewhat justified in that the singers were addressing two exceptionally clueless and/or thickheaded teenagers. Sometimes you have to introduce subtle concepts with a clue-by-four.

{{quote|"So where are the clowns?

There ought to be clowns

Don't bother, they're here." }}

{{quote|"Nothing's better than more, more more...except all, all all!" ''[[Gonk]]!''}}

* In ''Jekyll and Hyde,'' Emma explains her reasons for marrying Jekyll to a thwarted suitor thus:

"And I ''felt'' you!" }}

** The histrionic manner in which the singers deliver these gems adds to the hilarity.

* [[Opera]] has its fair share of narmy moments:

** Even the most hardcore opera buffs will admit that the famous [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NYm7oJXVeks "madness scene"] from ''Lucia di Lammermoor'', where Lucia {{spoiler|has stabbed the man she was forced to marry and stands around in her bloody wedding dress and fantazises about her true love}}, is comical if it's not done ''really'' well. The music is still [[Awesome Music (Sugar Wiki)|awesome]], though.

How'd I fail to see this little bedtime tale was funny?

I could cry to think of all the irony I've missed. }}

* Andrew Lloyd-Webber's other big success, ''[[Cats]]'', has potentially narmy moments, the fight with [[The Dreaded|Macavity]] not least among them. The rest of the musical is eiter great at coming across as [[Narm Charm|better for any narmy scenes]], but the choreography of that scene is comparable to the infamous dance-fighting from ''[[West Side Story]]''.

* ''Titanic: The Musical'': During the sinking of the ship, the ship's designer Mr. Andrews bemoans the problems with the ship that could have been fixed before the ship even set sail, with the song "Mr Andrews' Vision". As the ship sinks in the background, he pores over the blueprints and goes "And this! And this! And this! AND THIS!".

== Pop ==

* Diane Warren, the incarnation of [[Narm]] if there can be such a thing. Her songs run the gamut between this and [[Tastes Like Diabetes]]. That such a prolific writer of [[Silly Love Songs]] is apparently ''[[Asexuality|asexual]]'' may explain it all. A list of her more notable works is [[wikipedia:Diane Warren#Selective list of songs by Diane Warren|here]].

{{quote|"But it's time to face the truth:

I will never be with you." }}

** The ''[[I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue]]'' version replaces that with "oh bugger".

*** Also, once, they were playing 'Singalong'. When Humph said MacArthur Park was going to be Tim's song, Graeme buzzed in, objecting with 'I thought you said we'd be singing!'.

{{quote|Spring was never waiting for us, girl

It ran one step ahead

In love's hot, fevered iron

Like a striped pair of pants. }}

*** None of this is really Richard Harris' fault, as he obviously put in a lot of effort. It's beautifully sung, but brought down by the ridiculous lyrics.

* From [[Chicago (band)|Chicago]]'s "Look Away," the opening lines of the first verse:

{{quote|"When you called me up this morning

** Bono's beyond-[[Large Ham]] stage patter in the live tracks on ''Rattle and Hum'':

{{quote|This [[Helter Skelter]] is a song Charles Manson stole from [[The Beatles]]. We're stealing it back.

* The grammatical redundancy trainwreck in [[Wings (band)|Wings]]' otherwise great "Live and Let Die": "in this ever-changing world ''in'' which we live ''in''". Weirdly enough, Chrissie Hynde's cover of it, where she "corrects" it to "in which we live", is even worse because it doesn't scan. "...in which we're livin'" would've made a great compromise (and still makes a great [[Mondegreen]]).

** Its appearance in [[Shrek]] 3... The scene with the king's funeral would have been [[Tear Jerker|sad]] if it wasn't for this song being sung by a frog.

is marvelous and yellow..." }}

*** Yes, the nights used to get yellow in London, but if you didn't already know that...

** The third verse of "Calico Skies." "Calico Skies" is a beautiful, delicate love song to the lovely Linda, his first wife. But he tries to make it a "protest song" in the third verse, and isn't much more successful at it than Nickelback (see below for that one). Keep in mind that there's no change in melody or tone from the undying declarations of love:

{{quote|Long live all of us crazy soldiers

* [[Feist]]'s song "A Commotion" off her new album, Metals, is a decent song, with the exception of the weird male chant that makes up the chorus. It comes out of nowhere and doesn't sound good, ruining the song almost completely. When she performs it live, she has her female backup singers do the chant, and it sounds MUCH BETTER given the sassiness of their voices.

* "[[Title Drop|You're so vain]], [[Logic Bomb|you probably think this song is about you]]." The "you" in this line has been mentioned in almost every stanza, almost every line; how could the song ''not'' be about "you"?

*** Then there's the brilliant [[Stealth Pun|vocabulary]]: rhyming [[Meaningless Meaningful Words|"yacht"]], [[Meaningless Meaningful Words|"apricot"]] (as a color) and [[Meaningless Meaningful Words|"gavotte"]] (in the [[Stealth Pun|first]] verse!)

* [[Rihanna]]'s "Disturbia" is a cool song. But watch the video...at the end, Rihanna revels in the "bum bum be-dum bum bum be dum bum" as if it were a cursed incantation.

* Neil Diamond's "I Am, I Said" includes Diamond reaching for a rhyme to "there" and ending up with "And no one heard at all, not even the chair". Because the chair might, in other circumstances... never mind.

** Similarly, in "You Were Meant For Me", Jewel seems ticked off that her coffee cup doesn't answer her.

** Even weirder now, because so many people miss 2/3 oif the historical references, and assume things like U2 and Sugar Ray refer to bands.

** Speaking of Billy Joel, "Piano Man" contains the line "I knew it complete when I wore a younger man's clothes". The thing is, "Piano Man" was written in approximately 1973, and Joel is ''still singing it in concert in this millenium.'' Not quite "C Moon"-level absurdity, but it's a narmy line in an otherwise brilliant song.

{{quote|"I'm [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v{{=}}WMPM1q_Uyxc#t{{=}}2m36s serious as cancer] when I say rhythm is a '''''dancer!'''''"}}

** Made all the more amusing by his temporary inability to pronounce the word "rhythm" in the line immediately prior, despite saying it correctly in every other instance.

{{quote|''I was kinda like soul-searching, but your body's so jaw-dropping...'}}

** Regarding that song, what about the first lines? The [[Mood Whiplash|sudden change]] from "some boy died" to "lolsextime" is just narmtastic.

** "Earth Song" pushed the [[Narm]] [[Up to Eleven]]. Michael was passionate about protecting the environment, and sometimes his fervour got in the way of his better judgment. Most of the song is well done, mind you. But after the bridge and the rather awkward [[Truck Driver's Gear Change]], something snaps; Michael begins screaming about things that [[You Bastard|we the human race]] don't care about enough. "What about the bleeding earth? Can't you feel its wounds?" is fine, but then Michael shrieks that we've lost the trust of ''elephants,'' follows it by lamenting "crying whales," and demands "What about Abraham?" ([[Flat What|What?]]) And then he yells "DO WE GIVE A DAMN?" and begins crying and wailing in tune to the chorus. This goes ''just'' fast enough that we barely have time to register one outrage before he moves to the next.

*** The video makes the histrionics even better. It defies description. Suffice it to say, we need to retire the "Jesus pose" from all music videos forever.

** This exchange from "The Girl Is Mine" is particularly hilarious if you try to imagine it occurring during an actual argument (thankfully, the song is silly anyway):

{{quote|'''[[Paul McCartney|Paul]]''': Michael, we're not gonna fight about this.<br />

{{quote|You ask me if I love you, and I choke on my reply

I'd rather hurt you honestly than mislead you with a lie }}

{{quote|And sometimes when we touch

The honesty's too much

** Again, [[Low]] [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NZuJmbDL9q4 covered the song] with somewhat less Narm involved.

* We R Who We R by Kesha. Try not groaning when you hear "DJ turn it UP-GUP-GUP-GUP-GUP" in all different pitches like it's something awesome.

* "Grenade" by Bruno Mars. Mixing [[Painful Rhyme]], [[Wangst]] and [[Romantic Hyperbole]] to come up with lyrics like this:

{{quote|I would catch a grenade for ya

*** Wait, so that's not ''actually'' the lyric? Damn. I was hoping it was a Salome/John the Baptist reference.

{{quote|I shoulda known, you was trouble from the first kiss. You had your eyes wide open, '''why were they open?!?'''}}

{{quote|Yes, I would die for ya baby

But you won't do the same }}

* [[Selena Gomez]] And The Scene's ''A Year Without Rain'' is a [[Your Mileage May Vary|pretty good song]] until Selena decided to add the lines ''[[Mood Whiplash|I'm so glad you found me,]] [[Totally Radical|stick around me,]] [[Rule of Three|baby baby baby,]] ooooooo...'' This is actually cut out from the TV version of the music video.

* "Say It Right" is a beautiful song. But the part Nelly Furtado says, "From my body I can show you a place God knows", going from romantic to... [[Intercourse with You|something else]].... It doesn't help matters that the next line is "You should know the space is holy; do you really wanna go?"

** Since some people find her incredibly outrageous, for the people who ''don't'' find her outrageous, her attempts at provoking shock and horror can border on the hilarious. One example is the line from her song Government Hooker (hell, even the ''song title'' is funny) that goes "Put your hands on me John F. Kennedy," and her [[Despair Event Horizon]] scene in her Marry The Night video where she {{spoiler|unrolls a sanitary towel and sticks it across her breasts}} - it's so obvious that she's trying to be shocking, so when it fails, it fails hard.

*** The aforementioned Marry The Night moment becomes especially funny because, well, who on Earth needs a pad that big? My roommates and I laughed about it for hours afterward when we watched the video premiere on Youtube.

* [[Big Time Rush]]:

** ''[http://youtu.be/jUOdO5dqPeU Boyfriend]'' has these lyrics at the bridge:

Bigger than the [[Twilight (novel)|Twilight]] love affair<br />

I'll be here girl I swear }}

{{quote|(Oh)

Wherever the wind blows me

My name's Shaniqua, and what?!

Naaaaa! }}

{{quote|"Then he looks at the cabinet

getting close to the cabinet!

** By the end of episode 21, there's no question whatsoever. [[The Family for the Whole Family|Just]] [[All Just a Dream|trust]] [[Blast Out|me]].

* Ja Rule's [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TkOwOQCMYtM "Mesmerize"] is a shamelessly narmy love song. [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VcP96KbFIIU The music video] just makes takes the [[Narm]] level [[Up to Eleven]].

by the [[Rouge Angles of Satin|M-U-R-E-D-R]] Inc" }}

* "Cleaning Out My Closet" by Eminem would be creepier if they hadn't left in the studio talk at the beginning.

*** From ''Love The Way You Lie'' "Now you get to watch her leave out the window, [[Incredibly Lame Pun|GUESS THAT'S WHY THEY CALL IT WINDOW PANE!!!]]"

** The end of "[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S9bCLPwzSC0 Mockingbird]" does a lot to kill some the touching vibe the song had going on.

I'mma find the jeweler who sold it to you, make him every carot, [[Precision F-Strike|don't fuck with Dad]]!" }}

** Overall, ''When I'm Gone'' is a good song, but it's impossible not to smile a little when Eminem sings the lyrics: ''But we're in Sweden / Baby, how'd you get to Sweden''? To be fair, the subject matter of the song outright states that he was having a truly bizarre nightmare.

* "Me and My B* tch" by [[The Notorious B.I.G.]] contains an infamous second line that causes most listeners to rewind to see if they really heard it.

{{quote|''You look so good, I suck on your daddy's dick''}}

{{quote|[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v{{=}}ggNymSJ52Fw Sittin' at the ghetto thinkin' 'bout All my homies passed away] [[Frankenstein's Monster|(Uunngh)]]}}

* "Rocketeer" by the Far East Movement was an otherwise good song, but one particular verse just sounds ridiculous:

{{quote|''Let's go the next level, [[Super Mario]]''

''I hope this works out, cardio'' }}

{{quote|"MOOOOOOOOOVE BITCH, GET OUT THE WAY!"}}

 

* Probably the most horrific example has to be Tim Capello's "I Still Believe", as seen in the movie ''[[The Lost Boys]]''. It's not even the raspy-fart saxophone playing, nor that the man himself is a mulleted, unitard-wearing wrestler-lookalike; it's lyrics like "I'll take my place, Upon this stage, I'll wait till the end of time for you like everybody else!!" The last lines of this verse are sung in such quick succession, with such unbelievable gusto, that it sounds like Capello's about to explode, take off, foul himself, and orgasm all at once.

** All that, and the fact that it sounds like he's actually ''fucking'' his saxophone, judging by the rythmic, shrieking blasts and final orgasmic shudder it makes as the song finishes.....

** The original version of the song by Santa Cruz new wave band the Call is good and has a much better delivery; the potential humor of the lyrics is almost unnoticeable.

* Many songs by [[Nickelback]]:

** "If Everyone Cared..." is their spectacularly non-specific, crowd-pleasing, inoffensive ''protest song,'' in which Chad Kroger whines about how much better the world would be if, like, [[Clueless Aesop|nobody ever had to be sad and stuff]]. If this counts as a protest song, then maybe [[The Sixties]] were all in vain.

** Most of the album ''All The Right Reasons,'' from which those three songs came, is full of Narm.

** And who could forget "Laughing With"? God can be so hilarious, HA HA!

** "Us" features a doubleshot of narm in quick succession, when Spektor unleashes a stream of toy soldiers from her mouth during a falsetto note (a la Peter Gabriel's stop-motion "Sledgehammer" video) and hilariously overemphasizes the word "contagious" (or, in this case, "Oh, it's con-TAY-gio-u-u-u-ussss!"). Coupled with her involuntarily lifting her upper lip as she says the word, it makes her look like she has some sort of speech impediment.

{{quote|"RAPE ME! [[No Indoor Voice|RAPE ME!]] [[Rape Is Love|RAPE ME MY FRIEND!]] [[Redundancy Department of Redundancy|RAAAAPE ME! RAPE ME!]] [[Here We Go Again|RAPE ME AGAIN!]]"}}

** [[Completely Missing the Point|Who's Jim?]]

* Have you heard that Art Alexakis, lead singer of Everclear, has daddy issues? Oh, you haven't? Listen to one of his songs. Which one? Take your pick. He's [[Anvilicious|not particularly subtle about it]].

** Also, almost every song he ever wrote refers to his dead brother or girlfriend in one way or another.

{{quote|"What? No, this ain't no dammit Ex-Lax commercial."}}

** Also from P!nk:

{{quote|"This used to be a funhouse

But now it's full of evil clowns" }}

{{quote|Here am I

Flashing no colour; tall in this room, overlooking the ocean

** It's [[Narm]] '''[[Recycled in Space|WITH A GRATUITOUS]]''' '''[[The Beatles|BEATLES]]''' '''[[Recycled in Space|REFERENCE!!!]]'''

* [[Kate Bush]] has a tendency to write great songs that are nearly ruined by a line or two of Narm, like "Mmm, yes, I said mmm, yes" from "The Sensual World".

** How about "Wuthering Heights" and its video? "Heathcliff! It's me, Cathy, I've come home! I'm so co-o-old, let me in-a your window." Combine that with her extremely bizarre dancing, which eventually turns into random spinning, and her bright red lipstick and dress, and you've got an incredibly Narmy ballad.

** The way she says 'GODDDDDD' in [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GuLlwUaEyr0 "Running Up That Hill"].

* With their enormous, bombastic overproduced sound and occasional silly lyrics, [[Def Leppard]] can sometimes end up sounding kinda narmy. The crowning example has to be the song "Let's Get Rocked"; there are few words to describe Joe Elliot bellowing, "''LET'S GET THE [[Gosh Dang It to Heck|ROCK]] OUT OF HERE!''" or asking (when the singer ends up getting turned off after discovering that his girlfriend only likes classical music), "I suppose a rock's out of the question?"

* Most of the lyrics from the [[Lou Reed]]/[[Metallica]] collaboration album, ''Lulu'', including the infamous "I am a table" line.

* [[Steve Vai]] whenever he sings. His voice and lyrics are dreadfully narmy, making otherwise good music laughably unlistenable. Don't get me wrong, Mr. Vai is an innovative and stellar guitarist who's probably in the running for greatest guitarist of all time. Please just stick to instrumentals.

** Or have someone else sing. Then again, he was in [[Whitesnake]] for awhile.

 

== R&B/Soul ==

* [[Stevie Wonder]]'s ''Livin' for the City'' is an amazing song with a poignant message about hardship and adversity faced by impoverished African-Americans, and it's obvious that Stevie took the whole endeavor very seriously. With that in mind, why'd he get ''[[The Muppet Show|Animal]]'' to sing the second half?

* Willow Smith's song [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ymKLymvwD2U "Whip My Hair"]. With the chorus line of "I whip my hair back and forth", Tumblr is having a field day with this song.

 

 

* [[Steven Seagal]]'s frankly hilarious album, "Songs from the Crystal Cave", that are narmy, [[Anvilicious]] and painful. In the song "War":

{{quote|You will sell us all these lies, like a can of soup.}}

* Trade Martin's "[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oaQBrTROj2w We've Gotta Stop the Mosque at Ground Zero]". Words cannot describe how surreal some of the lyrics are. It sounds disturbingly like something out of [[South Park]].

* Some of Jacques Brel's live performance videos are pure [[Narm]], especially when there are close-ups to Brel's face and you see him all sweaty and shivering as he sings. No matter how gorgeous the song is, when the camera does ''that''....

* There's just something about [[Doctor Who|Murray Gold's]] "[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z5_4SiiICew Song of Freedom]" that's a little too earnest. [[Your Mileage May Vary]]; it's also listed under [[Awesome Music (Sugar Wiki)|Awesome Music]].

* ''[[Cracked.com]]'' has a list of [http://www.cracked.com/video_17208_8-most-unintentionally-hilarious-amateur-music-videos.html 8 Most Unintentionally Hilarious Amateur Music Videos]. They earn their position.

* Paul Gross' "Ride Forever." Paul has a good voice, but the lyrics...

{{quote|"They tell me I'm an old man

* "Diary of an Unborn Child". The supposed [[Downer Ending]] of the titular fetus's demise by abortion is more of a relief from the [[Tastes Like Diabetes|sickly-sweet]] [[Glurge]] it has seen fit to offload on us, but it takes a hard left into full-blown [[Narm]] when it starts ''singing''.

** The ending's on a bizarre borderline between narm and [[Nightmare Fuel]]: it's a ''fetus from beyond the grave'' asking "Why did you kill me, mommy?" In song, with a [[Alvin and The Chipmunks|chipmunk-esque helium voice.]] Then again, it's probably ''supposed'' to cause nightmares. It isn't supposed to cause groaning...

** [http://blogfiles.wfmu.org/KF/0510/markie/02_-_Lil_Markie_-_Diary_Of_An_Unborn_Child.mp3 Here's a link].

* [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-BEy5LaIGOo Whatever this Vocaloid song] is supposed to be about, it's (intentionally?) ''so bad'' that all the singing sounds like it's done on helium. And it's called "Women's Blues." It's also [[So Bad It's Good]] - the thing has four stars! (Or at least, so bad it's funny.)

** In "Circle You, Circle You," a very creepy song otherwise, one of the lyrics translates to "You lost the game."

** If you listen to them enough times, most creepy [[Vocaloid]] songs may become Narm.

** [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KjWHko1PZnI "MUTEKI.SHOUJO 99"] by Kaai Yuki, is '''insanely''' bad with the Narm. First off, the ''whole song'' is in [[Gratuitous English]]. "I'm not girl, candy girl"? Uh, yeah. Second, the chorus is [[Most Annoying Sound|ear rape,]] and the hard rock guitars come out of nowhere after the electronic sound the verse preceding it had. Third, the artist wants us to think that six-or-something-year-old girl is the awesomest person ever to walk the earth. Needless to say, she doesn't qualify, especially after the [[Gratuitous English]] and grating chorus. Fourth, the artist decides to throw in some ad-libs like "huh" and "yeah". However, since the ad-libs are 1) in English, and 2) being sung by a [[Vocaloid]], it sounds more funny than awesome or edgy.

* "CHOCOLATE RAIN! SOME STAY DRY AND OTHERS FEEL THE PAIN!" Yeah, "Chocolate Rain" is pure narm. So is most of Tay Zonday's music.

* "I Am The Wind", from the closing credits to [[Castlevania: Symphony of the Night]]. Of course, pretty much every part of this game ''apart'' from the actual gameplay is just narmtastic.

* ''Coda: A Burn Scar in the Shape of the Sooner State'' by [[Los Campesinos]]! is a poignant track, presumably about the death of a loved (maybe unrequitedly) one but this descends into narm with the lines "I fall to my knees / My piss-soaked jeans". One would assume it was from shock and fear but... yeah. It manages to recover from it though.

* The sudden transition from droning piano chords to circus-synths in [[Enya]]'s "Cursum Perficio" destroys the song's intended dark tone. But for others, of course, it might be more than a bit unsettling.

* [[Hulk Hogan]] And The Wrestling Boot Band's album ''[http://www.i-mockery.com/bad-albums/hogan/ Hulk Rules]'' alternates between [[So Bad It's Good]] and [[So Bad It's Horrible]] in general, but [http://www.i-mockery.com/bad-albums/hogan/hogan1.mp3 "Hulkster In Heaven"] stands out as narm since it's the only song that's really meant to be taken seriously to begin with. It's supposed to be a sincere tribute to a fan who died at a young age, but the lyrics keep throwing in gratuitous references to Hulk Hogan himself ("I used to tear my shirt, but now you tore my heart/ I knew you were a hulkamaniac right from the very start"), to the point where it's almost more about him than it is his late fan. Then there's the cheesy synthesized backing music, and of course the fact that, well, it's ''Hulk Hogan'' singing what's meant to be a moving ballad (with some much more capable gospel-style backing vocalists helping out).

{{quote|Everyone, strum your [[wikipedia:Kora (instrument)|koras!]]<br />

Strike the [[wikipedia:Balafon|balafons!]] }}

* Music-related: [[Something Awful]] [http://www.somethingawful.com/d/your-band-sucks/music-magazines.php recommended] ''Pit'', a [[Death Metal]] magazine, for unintended hilarity, particularly the band names ("Lair of the Minotaur is a side-project of the guys from 7000 Dying Rats and Pelican. If you are into the tunes of guys like The Christpunchers, Rwake, Cult of Luna, and Earthride then this is your shit.").

* Jon and Vangelis's music is awesome, few would discuss it. But the video for [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hti1iZ9LsIU I hear you now]... um, it has ''not'' aged well. The [[Ambiguously Gay]] classic dancer, the clowninsh mimes and Jon's horrible [[Eighties Hair]] '''really''' distract you from the great song.

** Some of the sound effect in ''[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5IDMjwUuG3k The Tao of Love]'' are bound to mae people chucle. 1:33 in the video linked here is specially bad about it.

* VAJAS´s [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5eveNk3o1ME Sparrow of the Wind]. Listen to it without cracking a smile.

** ''[http://youtu.be/WY2r28M1TrY Manhattan Skyline]'' is [[Tear Jerker|a VERY sad break-up song]] about two [[Star-Crossed Lovers]]. Well, if you ignore how Morten Harket lets out a rather overblown [[Big No]] in the first chorus.

* Not sure what section, but pretty much anything by [[Barry Manilow]] likely falls into this category.

 

{{reflist}}