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Narm/Music: Difference between revisions
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{{trope}}
[[File:vanilla2_7389.jpg|link=Vanilla Ice (Music)|
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** [[Sure Why Not]]
** It is called White Metal by some. Others call it ''Jesus Metal.''
*** Or "Unblack Metal" ([
* [[Protest the Hero]] is ordinarily not very cheesy, but... watch the video for "Bloodmeat." Seriously, what is Rody doing?
* Rhapsody (an Italian power metal band) have lyrics telling an original [[High Fantasy]] story. The extreme cheesiness of the story coupled with the writer's less-than-optimal grasp of English produce highly Narmful results on a regular basis. Also, the singers have thick accents. Let's think about it: a group of people with thick accents singing about somebody named "Nekron" conquering the "Darklands". The music is completely serious. Here's a hint, guys: if you don't have a good grasp on English, SING IN YOUR NATIVE TONGUE. It makes everything better.
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Under thy wings of sorrow. . ." }}
** Except Webster's dictionary gives it a secondary definition of "1. to deposit or conceal in a hiding place 2. to appropriate secretly: abstract - alteration of obsolete secret, from 'secret'." Perhaps another word would have been a clearer choice, but it's still the correct, albeit archaic, meaning.
** Even if it's technically correct, the fact remains that "secrete" is now used almost exclusively in a medical/biology context, which also gives the word some icky connotations. (And they use it again in [http://www.darklyrics.com/lyrics/tristania/beyondtheveil.html#2 Aphelion], and with the [[Engrish|wrong conjugation ]]to boot.) Tristania does this with [
* The folk metal band Elvenking, listen to [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EDvmQPK0Fh4 "Seasonspeech"] for instance. Here a male metal singer, a female singer, growls and a female operatic voice are mixed. Couple that with electric guitars, bass, drums and a violin.
* '''''[[Avenged Sevenfold (Music)|NIIIIIIIIIGHTMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA~RE]]'''''
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You send him out a nicer giant than he was when he came in... }}
* "[[Wicked (Theatre)|Defying Gravity]]" is either this or [[Crowning Moment of Awesome]].
* "Dancing is Not a Crime" from [[Footloose]]. It's [[Narm]] masquerading as [[Piss
* It's downright tragic that the English translation of the beautiful musical ''Kristina frÃ¥n [[Duvem Ã]]¥la'' (or simply ''Kristina'') throws out all the glory of the original Swedish lyrics, replacing it with purple prose and repeating the same stuff over and over and over and over and ''over'' again. The one song that manages to go safe from this is the hauntingly beautiful ''Gold Can Turn To Sand'', which in its English form may not have half the impact of the original Swedish lyric but at least it isn't narmtastic purple prose.
** One particularly bad offender is the ballad ''In the Dead of Darkness'', where the titular line is repeated countless times in a two minute song. The original lyric, simply called ''Stanna'' (''Stay'') never says a word about darkness and actually goes into detail of what Karl Oskar would be losing if Kristina died, rather than harp on about the stupid dead of darkness.
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== Pop ==
* Diane Warren, the incarnation of [[Narm]] if there can be such a thing. Her songs run the gamut between this and [[Tastes Like Diabetes]]. That such a prolific writer of [[Silly Love Songs]] is apparently ''[[Asexuality|asexual]]'' may explain it all. A list of her more notable works is [
* James Blunt's "You're Beautiful." It's the voice and the line about the "Angel with a smile on her face (who)... thought up that I should be with you!" that does it. It may be interpreted as a [[Stalker With a Crush]] story -- he is so madly in love with a woman that he has only ''caught a glimpse of at the subway''! Then there's the music video, in which James Blunt spends almost the entire song slowly stripping down to his underwear (all in a single shot) and then ''throws himself off a cliff'' to these lines:
{{quote| "But it's time to face the truth: <br />
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*** Made ([[Your Mileage May Vary|Probably.]]) less narmy when you consider that is might possibly be a song about a funeral.
** "The Little Things Give You Away":
{{quote| " ''"All [[George W. Bush|you]] ever wanted was for some to truly look up to you. And six feet underwater,'' '''I DO'''."}}
* [[Meat Loaf]]'s song "Two Out of Three Ain't Bad" features the Narmy chorus, "I want you, I need you, but there ain't no way I'm ever gonna love you, but don't feel sad, 'cause two out of three ain't bad".
** Then there's the song "For Crying Out Loud" with these lines:
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* "Revelation", the 18 plus minute jam that took up the second half of Love's ''Da Capo'', is widely considered this, mainly due to Arthur Lee's vocal hysterics which range from unintentionally creepy to [[So Bad It's Good|downright hilarious]].
* There isn't a [[Foreigner (Music)|Foreigner]] song that ''isn't'' Narmtastic, but "[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=puzT2aYCCv8 I Want To Know What Love Is]" is truly a crowning achievement.
* Name any [[K-On!|Afternoon Tea Time]] that DOESN'T go on this path. The Nu-Metal-ish (along with [[Piss
** "Don't Say Lazy" is such a hard rock song...yet look at the title. Try not to laugh. Also, this part before the chorus:
{{quote| Oh crap, I broke a nail<br />
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** The song also suffers from severe [[Lyrical Dissonance]]--lines like "thousands of Americans died in the attacks" are sung in an upbeat tone.
* Some of Jacques Brel's live performance videos are pure [[Narm]], especially when there are close-ups to Brel's face and you see him all sweaty and shivering as he sings. No matter how gorgeous the song is, when the camera does ''that''....
* There's just something about [[Doctor Who
* [[Cracked]] has a list of [http://www.cracked.com/video_17208_8-most-unintentionally-hilarious-amateur-music-videos.html 8 Most Unintentionally Hilarious Amateur Music Videos]. They earn their position.
* The Japanese [[Enka]] song [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ssyl9xKM9Vc "Sake Yo"] by Ikuzo Yoshi. The last chorus roughly translates to "I apologize for drinking sake alone and listening to enka. I love you, [[This Is Sparta|AND THAT YOU UNDERSTAND]]. Is that right, my sake..." It sounds better and less [[Narm|Narmtastic]] in Japanese. (Note: Enka is roughly analogous to country in Japan.)
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* It can be said that many school songs and national anthems, while patriotic/heartfelt/sincere, are very narmy. This is particularly true of English translations of national anthems that were originally written in another language. What would sound poetic and poignant in one language can sound really silly in another, if the translation is done badly. Other times, over-the-top rhetoric is used, and it seems like every time the song is sung, it is a call to arms. No specific examples though, don't want to ruffle any feathers.
** The translated opening lines of Senegal's national anthem have a certain [[Narm Charm]]:
{{quote| Everyone, strum your [
Strike the [
** The anthems for Brazilian soccer teams. If you know some Portuguese, take a look [http://www.objetivandodisponibilizar.com.br/?p=2293 here.]
* Music-related: [[Something Awful]] [http://www.somethingawful.com/d/your-band-sucks/music-magazines.php recommended] ''Pit'', a [[Death Metal]] magazine, for unintended hilarity, particularly the band names ("Lair of the Minotaur is a side-project of the guys from 7000 Dying Rats and Pelican. If you are into the tunes of guys like The Christpunchers, Rwake, Cult of Luna, and Earthride then this is your shit.").
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