Nostalgia Critic/WMG: Difference between revisions

== Doug ==

 

That or just do the talking. Because, lets face it, it's going to happen again and Doug seems to be running out of ideas. He's done one video mute, he's done a silent film, and he's called in Spoony and Linkara ([[And Zoidberg|and Microsoft Sam!]]))

 

That would explain the more ridiculous of his spelling errors. Plus, he ''does'' say his spelling is like "crossing a dyslexic with a complete idiot." Doug is obviously not a complete idiot, so...

* He did see Penguin as misspelled when it wasn't and Rob didn't point it out, so maybe.

 

 

He's tall and skinny with a goatee. He changes his name often, and the place where he posts his videos is nondescript.

 

* This makes some sense, but that's probably not why he's riffing. He's doing a series of controlled experiments to determine why and how riffing affects the experience of viewing bad cinema, and using the comments section under the video to gauge each experiment's effectiveness. Eventually, he will determine which collection of which clips of film is impervious to riffing; after splicing together a master reel, he will use ''that'' film to conquer the world. It's the best way to overcome the greatest weakness in his superweapon!

 

After years of the Critic seeing bad films, he loses it and becomes evil. Then he shows others (Joel, Mike, and the bots) what it felt like to be him.

 

* If this is true, he's ''incredibly'' narcissistic. Also, they must be separated by several incarnations- going by the Doctor, they usually don't like their immediate successor. And NC ''loves'' Ebert.

 

...a.k.a. Teddy Ruxpin. Well, think about it. At the end of the Halloween '08 special, that demon bear ostensibly killed the Critic; how else would you come out of a conflict with [[Satan]] except by selling your soul? Further proof: [[Running Gag|the number of times]] he's [[Death Is Cheap|come back to life]]. Sure, [[Transformers|Optimus Prime]] brought him back once, but the sheer number of times he's died and come back is [[Rule of Funny|absurd]]. It's even [[Lampshade Hanging|lampshaded]] by Chester A. Bum in his review of the fight. We really see the fruits of this little deal later on, in the Final Battle with [[The Angry Video Game Nerd]], when the Critic, well, shoots lightning and resembles the devil, with no real explanation. He then resembles a different devil and bellows [[Skyward Scream|DIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE]] at the end of his [[Good Burger]] review, with, again, no real explanation.

 

** And even if he didn't sell his soul to Teddy Ruxpin, he's either sold it to Sage or at the very least, can be controlled by him. Nobody deserves that.

 

I'm not really sure what my reasoning is on this one, I was half-asleep and maybe a little drunk when I came up with this idea. They have similar hats and issues managing anger. I believe there was something about the respawn technology slowing the aging process and bringing the NC back on the multitude of times he's died. That's all I got.

 

Put glasses, the hat, and a goatee on Kyon, you've got the Nostalgia Critic.

* So who's Haruhi? [[The Nostalgia Chick]]?

 

He said he would go gay for [[Keith David]]'s voice, and has a brief [[Ho Yay]] moment with Will Smith in one of his other reviews. He also calls Ernie Hudson so charming he's like a black Clark Gable.

 

Years ago, in a secret lab, a group of scientists attempted to make a young man named Doug into a fighting machine for the CIA. They kidnapped him from high school and subjected him to all kinds of mental tests, which included analysing information like films and images. However, Doug was quite sarcastic and cynical. In his cell-hotel-room...thing where the CIA kept Doug, was a TV. Doug watched a lot of TV, including film channels. One day, Doug was injected with a hormone to make him fly into a rage at the slightest provocation. Anything illogical or remotely frustrating caused Doug to spin wildly out of control. He escaped the film room and back to his cell, where Batman and Robin was playing on the TV. Doug, still under the effects of the drug, bore witness to the 'Bat Credit Card' scene. And something in him snapped. He began foaming at the mouth and screaming 'YOU BASTARDS! YOU GAVE MY HERO A BAT! CREDIT! CARD! I'LL FUCKING SNAP YOUR NECKS!' He stole a guard's gun and began shooting randomly, killing multiple CIA agents. Doug became a fugitive, and ran all the way back to his parents' house, where the drug wore off. But Doug was a changed man. In the years the CIA had him in their custody, Doug had aged and become more intelligent. Deciding that Doug was no longer his identity, he vowed to review the crappy things he had seen on his CIA TV, and much more (including Batman and Robin, which gave him an 'episode' later on), adopting the name 'The Nostalgia Critic', and using his new, CIA-trained powers for entertainment, not evil. The CIA did discover him at one point, and they recruited [[The Angry Video Game Nerd]] to assassinate the Critic, but the Critic survived, at which point the CIA just gave up and went on to very secretly sue Seth MacFarlane for [[American Dad]]! The Critic still suffers 'episodes' from his CIA treatment. These 'episodes' can be seen [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zDZXlVTtU0k here], [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gqLH9CY4dws here], [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HB58XowBGYc here], [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kx-97uRkzRg here], [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K-hGLWlj_ko here], and [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B7HptBgSaCg here].

 

Evident through the following: short hair, goatee and glasses for one. Also, {{spoiler|he destroyed a DVD copy of [[The Neverending Story (film)|The Neverending Story]] III with a crowbar}}, and sometimes he tends to lose his voice. Perhaps at a future review, he'd be at a rage so bad that he would lose his voice for good. After that, instead of watching shitty movies, he will move on to Theoretical Physics, go to MIT, and wind up working at Black Mesa after graduating.

** [[The Nostalgia Chick]] becomes [[Portal (series)|Chell]]; [[GLaDOS]] is Dr Tease (ELiSA).

 

* Just because it would a total [[Ironic Hell]] for someone who devoted most of his time remembering stuff to not being able to remember anything anymore.

** [[Nightmare Fuel|Oh God]], [[Tear Jerker|please no]].

*** Though it would [[The Woobie|fit with his character arc.]]

 

He's said himself that the only thing he'd get out of ''The Lost World'' is that he's a glutton for punishment.

 

It would make sense. He can be heavily depressed, reasonably sane and mature, an excited little boy or completely batshit angry-crazy all in one episode.

 

Doug was given one in an attempt to give Ben more help. Unfortunately, it was even less stable than Ben's, and glitched. Thus, he has his own human form, but carries mental traits from his [[Unstoppable Rage|Apoplexian]] form and explosive powers from a [[I Love Nuclear Power|Prypiatosian]].

 

That is to say, the Nostalgia Critic ''is'' a work of fiction, but exists in between the real world and fiction as a whole, as a God that transcends both fiction and reality. He has godlike control over all works of fiction, as long as they are crappy and he reviews them. This is where he gains his power. This also explains how the Critic survives life-threatening injury. He survives it if he wills himself to.

 

They both cuss like sailors, they're prone to frequent and infantile fits of rage, and neither Karkat nor the Nostalgia Critic like very many people that much. Let's face it, Nostalgia Critic basically has the spoken equivalent of Karkat's constant allcaps rage. But why has Karkat dropped internet trolling to review movies? Because he wants to show us all how awful the movies and shows from our human childhoods really were.

** I would say that Karkat is more like [[The Angry Video Game Nerd]], seeing as they're both prone to making overly complex, detailed, and profane poop jokes.

 

Obsessed with his looks? Check. Low self-esteem? Check. Gets unneeded [[Hollywood Pudgy]] crap from [[Fan Dumb]]? Check. Eats a bizarre amount of food? Check. Vomits a lot and easily? Check. Has a skinny frame but slightly puffy cheeks? Check.

 

== The Critic's Past ==

 

Years ago, The Nostalgia Critic as a young boy had overprotective parents who refused to let him watch movies. Every time he says he enjoyed or disliked something as a kid, he's referring to something a friend showed him. When he grew up, he met a woman who was an amateur movie critic. They began dating, and every week, they would watch a bad movie together, making jokes about how bad it was. Eventually, they decided to get married, but That Guy, the Critic's [[Evil Counterpart]] kills her on the wedding day, leaving the Critic at the altar. Now, the Critic is bitter, still not knowing what happened to his fiancee all those years ago. Even to this day, however, now having learned what a good movie is, he continues their Bad Movie tradition in the form of movie reviews.

* [[Tear Jerker|That was surprisingly tragic...]]

 

* In [[Black Comedy Rape|"Spooning With Spoony 2"]], he said that "This is just like my prom night!" This could mean that he was [[Fridge Horror|date-raped]] by someone. Perhaps it was a girl he liked, and didn't want to admit it [[Double Standard Rape (Female on Male)|because people wouldn't think it was rape]].

** Pretty sure that was confirmed. And in ''[[Saved by the Bell]]'' he said he was stalked by a person he broke up with three times. [[The Woobie|Poor kid.]]

** He likes assertive women. [[Stockholm Syndrome|Figure that one out.]]

 

* Which explains his REALLY shrill scream at Weebo's holographic lady in [[Flubber]]

 

And by that I mean Daddy Critic, not Daddy Walker. Think about it, other than the [[Abusive Parents]] talk which involved both of them, he's mentioned his Dad once and that was only a line in the commercials special about what he would think. Which could also serve as a reason why he's so attached to his [[Momma's Boy|mom]], even though she's been established as being just as horrible.

* Possible given what was said in the Alaska review.

* Judging by what he's said in earlier reviews, they very likely got divorced.

 

There's no indication that they haven't tried to find another way of harnessing their dark god. [[Complete Monster|Let's face it]], [[Abusive Parents|they'd be seen as monsters by the Critic.]]

 

To make up for their many, many shortcomings. He's mentioned begging them for anything he liked in a commercial, he loves Christmas (although still believes in Santa) but is never satisfied with his presents afterwards and they took him out for a nice meal whenever he got a A-.

 

We know from Critic liking his granddad that nice-ish relatives ''exist'' and even though The Other Guy is an asshole with problems (like being proud to admit he's the Critic's puppet master), he's still much calmer and more responsible than his brother. So while Critic as a kid was in a constantly bad environment, he had a better childhood.

 

It would explain Critic's own childish temper tantrums, why he punished him so badly when he mouthed off once and why Critic clings to his mom (who in turn sounds like a [[Why Did You Make Me Hit You?]] kind of abuser).

* Relatedly, his far more masculine (far less endearing) persona might have been less [[Early Installment Weirdness]] and more trying to emulate his father. It can't have been a coincidence that Critic as we know him now started to solidify at the "[[Sesame Street|first show he ever saw]]".

 

Critic's pouted about growing up as a girl for a short time. Ask That Guy's complained about how dying with your parents would get them yelling at you to die more manly-like. Mommy and Daddy Glasses more than likely pushed them into the set gender roles when the boys didn't want to, thus setting them both up to be [[Sissy Villain]]s.

 

Let's look at what he's said and how he's acted in the past. He says defensively that he was an early bloomer, he's desperate for any kind of attention and has had a generally unsafe sex life for a very long time, he's complained about being ugly as a child (so would want someone to like him), his parents did the sensible thing for a change and taught him about stranger danger, he was curious enough in the commercials to call suspected pedophiles and didn't hang up despite being disgusted, and in ''[[Hook]]'' he assumes everyone has repressed childhood memories. Plus, it would fit the [[Adult Fear]]-laden/[[Hilariously Abusive Childhood]] angle he's always taken.

 

 

...of Douglas Walker. The status of their clone progenitor is unknown. But in the TGWTG 'verse, perfect human cloning exists (see Linkara's [[X-Men]] #424 review). This explains why NC, CAB and TGWTG can all be seen in the same conversation and why NC keeps coming back even after being killed several times. Or maybe [[Transformers|Optimus Prime]] just likes dying for him :)

* "The Top 11 [[Mind Screw|Mindfucks]]" video briefly shows multiple Critics in one shot. All a part of the mindfuckery, or evidence that this WMG is true? YOU DECIDE!

*** Or alternatively, they are clones but Doug still exists, being the one who controls the site and appears at cons as himself. He also gives the serious counterpart to Bum Reviews. Thus explaining how they were all together in Kickassia and Suburban Knights.

 

But of different time periods. In the near future, the Critic will review a movie so irredeemably bad it wil make the Garbage Pail Kids movie seem [[Up to Eleven|''decent'' by comparison.]] He will [[Go Mad from the Revelation|lose his f*** ing mind]] and become That Guy With The Glasses. Later he'll [[My God, What Have I Done?|realise how horrible a person he's become]] and jump off a cliff. When he wakes up his brain will be damaged and with no money becomes Chester A Bum. The Future Nostalgia Critic is when Chester A Bum finally gets his [[Catch Phrase|CHANGE!]] and will have enough money to get a therapist. Thus reverting to his old self

 

It would explain why they look the same. For that matter, the Bum could be Ask That Guy's kid as well.

* It would explain the critic's crayon drawing...

** [[Fridge Horror|Oh my God...]]

 

Specifically, of the original Doug Walker. In order to escape the abuse that life has given him, Mr Critic developed two different personalities. Ask that Guy essentially serves as an outlet for his more violent and disturbed actions, while the Nostalgia Critic provides an outlet for his cynicsm and [[Adult Child]] behaviour. The original personality became Chester A Bum, who, thanks to the other two personalities diverting all the pain and rage, became happy all the time.

 

However, several events would end up seperating the three. Ask that Guy became a more independent entity after selling his soul to the Devil, and gained the ability to gain a temporary physical form. This, combined with [[Atop the Fourth Wall|punches in time and hypertime destabilisation]] ended up fully seperating the three personalities. Now that the bonds are broken, their personalities have become more unstable.

 

The Critic is already one big woobie, and more than a little psychotic. In one timeline, the Critic broke down into despair due to [[The Woobie|his miserable life]], and lost his job. In order to deal with this, he ended up taking a bunch of drugs, and get himself a whole new personality. This is why Chester loves every movie, even Twilight. On the other side of Hypertime, he plain old broke, had a [[Heel Face Turn]] and became Ask That Guy. Hence why Ask That Guy retains many character traits of the Nostalgia Critic, yet on a far more demented level.

 

Both Chester and Ask That Guy have been sent back in time by the other Channel Awesome crew. They want to ensure that neither side becomes the Critic's future, by scaring the Nostalgia Critic straight. The "future Critic" is in fact an [[Alternate Universe]] version of the Critic, from a world where his parents were actually decent people. He's in charge of this whole operation, and is writing wrongs in various universes. He's also the Champion of his universe, and was one of the first to fight off Lord Vyce.

 

Both the Critic and Ask That Guy had a [[Hilariously Abusive Childhood]], with several notable similarities. Chester also seems to have had a rather bizarre past (if his "''I'' (insert joke here) once!" lines are any indication). I think they suffered the same terrible childhood together and just deal with it differently.

 

== Critic & Chick ==

 

Just like He-Man and She-Ra! If they ever find out about it, then they are gonna be ''pissed''.

** In the commentary for ''[[Fern Gully]]'', the alternate version of the "date" had them going all the way and finding out they were siblings ala [[Star Wars|Luke and Leia]].

=== Ma-Ti ===

 

His history clearly shows he has seen a lot of terrible cartoons on television, but it were his memories on Captain Planet that created this "unimaginary friend" based on the character Ma-Ti. He simply made him up just so he could torture him and suppress his thoughts on those crappy toons. When this guy, now known as Nostalgia Critic, finally found a way to express his opinion on those cartoons through the website, Ma-Ti saw this as a clean shot to get back at him for all the years of endless mind torture.

 

* This would actually explain the strange scene in Kickassia where the Critic hallucinates finding the Review Room and being taunted by Ma-Ti, who materializes out of nowhere. That also gives just a little bit more hope, as getting called loyal strong means that there is a part of the Critic that likes himself.

 

If this troper had to guess, it involved being a [[Romantic Runner-Up]], the matter of [[What Kind of Lame Power Is Heart, Anyway?]], and/or the rest of the Planeteers [[Jumping Off the Slippery Slope]] at some point.

 

However, he will [[Came Back Wrong|Come Back Wrong]], [[Gone Horribly Wrong|Horribly Wrong]].

** If they make another movie it will surely focus on the resurrection of Ma-Ti, but will as said [[Came Back Wrong|Come Back Wrong]]. I think they will do a [[Evil Dead]] scenario (hence the notion of the necrocom book) ending in all the cast of the TWTG-vers will die, but will later be dismissed as one of NC's [[All Just a Dream|Nightmares]].

=== Douchey [[Mc Nitpick]] ===

 

Or rather Douchey is one of those bastards that claim to have Asberger's on the net to gain sympathy while trolling.

 

Douchey exists solely to be a troll. Through [[Noodle Implements]], he stole a Lazarus Pit. He modified it so that being dunked in it wouldn't make you insane. Whenever the Nostalgia Critic is killed or kills himself, Douchey throws him into the pit, thus resurrecting him- so he can troll some more. Alternatively, he is the [[Grim Reaper]] in disguise, and doesn't bother to keep him dead for the same reason.

 

They both look similar and both scream [[Big No|'Noooooooo!']] in a whiny voice while flailing wildly. They both also seem obsessive in nature (Douchey picking out every little [[Fan Dumb|mistake]] with the Nostalgia Critic and John [[Stalker with a Crush|defending]] Tommy Wiseau's image).

 

=== Melvin, Brother of the Joker ===

 

After being "killed" at the charity drive, he simply went into hiding to avoid further vengeance for his suckitude. Plastic surgery fixed his scars, but to hide the rest of his features he took to wearing a mask. Now he torments Spoony as... '''Chuckles the Fucking Jester'''! Alternately, he was Chuckles ''first''. Do you wanna know how he got those scars? Burton the Robot fired a laser at him while he was holding that CD in front of his face. As he runs off crying, you can see shards and quite a bit of blood coming from the area around his mouth.

* [[Fridge Horror|No]]...[[Nightmare Fuel|God no]]!

=== Zack/Jack the Psycho Maniac ===

 

In "Revenge of the Commercials", the Nostalgia Critic believes that Zack the Lego Maniac grew up to be Zack the Psycho Maniac, a mad bomber who attacks him at the end of the episode. Despite this assumption, they are not the same person. Zack the Lego Maniac, as seen at the 7:08 mark, likely grew up to be a completely different psycho: {{spoiler|'''[[The Spoony Experiment|DOCTOR INSANO!]]'''}}

 

== Reviews ==

 

It would explain why he didn't believe it existed until forced to review it. But it drives him mad every year, so Santa Christ has to wipe his memory every time.

 

* [[Plan 9 from Outer Space]]. An infamously bad movie, one that no doubt many fans would clamor for him to review, as Ma-Ti suggested.

* [[Star Wars|The Phantom Menace]]. It's prime NC material, a big title, and was released 11 years before the 100th episode, even longer than Battlefield Earth. {{spoiler|You now feel old.}}

* [[Lost in Space]]. He did review it mere weeks later, coincidence?

 

To mirror his crossover with Linkara.

 

Maybe reviewing the lackluster film based on the show he hates the most will help him get over his problems.

* Jossed.

 

In his commentary for the Simon Sez review, he said that he was planning on doing two more crossovers by the end of the year. He, then, made a gag about wanting to have a crossover with Nash in the Doug's First Movie review. This gag was [[foreshadowing]] for a future crossover review that he'll be having with Nash this year.

 

He won't make one. There will be cameos from others. However, Linkara will be completely absent. However, the first Nostalgia Critic episode after that he'll interrupt complaining how the Nostalgia Critic cut him out, but NC will cut him off.

* Alternately, the Critic will think each cameo is Linkara, though with increasing skepticism about whether it actually is, until the last one, when he [[Genre Savvy|wises up]] and realizes it won't be Linkara... and this time it's actually Linkara.

** All Jossed.

 

What better way to end Doug's tenure as the Nostalgia Critic then with a movie that he considers the last bit of nostalgia for him?

 

Come on! He's the ''Nostalgia'' Critic, it only makes sense that he reviews something that's in his name.

 

== The Christmas Special ==

 

Think about it. He opened and closed the episode out like he was reading a story and the last time he was around, Critic accidentally went [[Kickassia|shooty-shooty.]] So why would he consider him to be anything more than a "dirty rotten bastard" who nobody would miss? And the other's grumpy-hate reactions at the end are strangely reminiscent of their whole "wanting him dead" thing for [[Kickassia]].<ref>And how they probably should have stayed instead of going back to comforting him if he cried during a one-on-one crossover</ref> True, this would prove that Santa Christ isn't all-knowing, not taking into account the Chick's childhood fucked her up good or the fact that Ask That Guy messed up his life happily on his own or even that Critic usually hates reviewing for making his life suck. It would also say that Santa Christ is slightly petty and indulges in grudge fantasies, but you can always take that as adding a bit more ambiguity to a [[Parody Sue]]. Everybody wins!

** Three more things. It's never mentioned again. Everyone goes back to their usual characterization. Santa Christ is definitely colder to the Critic in ''[[Care Bears]] II''.

 

Why did he do it? Maybe he still felt bitter over the events of ''[[The Ten Commandments]]'' vs. ''[[The Prince of Egypt]]''. Maybe he was punishing the Critic for letting Santa Claus die in his nostalgic commercial special. Maybe he's just a [[Jerkass Gods|dick.]] The point is, God felt like making the Critic feel rotten, so he redirected his guardian angel's pathway to a random reality, possibly realities, where everything worked out for the TGWTG crew, and the guardian angel.

 

Even the Nostalgia Critic would've benefited from not existing. Of course, the present-Critic doesn't know about that.

 

* Film Brain would be king of England.

** I'm pretty sure by Matthews birth, half of Europe would have to die before he was next in line for the throne (No, not Britain, Europe).

* Welshy would be married to Anne Hathaway.

 

This is going both off the above and the special:

* [[The Angry Joe Show|Angry Joe]] is admitted by darn near everywhere to be [[President Evil]] and nuked all of Canada. This also by extension kills Jesu Otaku's fellow [[Desu Des Brigade]] Member Arkada, not to mention billions of innocents. Plus who's to stay he won't, or hasn't already, bombed France and several other countries.

* [[Death Is Cheap|Phelous survived the destruction of Canada.]] However the nation's destruction filled him with rage, and Phelous is forming a terrorist cell to end America.

 

Which is why Angry Joe had no qualms blowing it up along with the rest of Cananda. It's also why he singled out Quebec.

* Probably extends to much of New England too.

 

Linkara may be the champion of this universe but sooner or later Vyce would have to deal with Doug. Given that the Critic can beat the Angry Video Game Nerd, the man who killed Bugs Bunny with his bare hands, Vyce likely knew that even his powers would be trumped by cartoon logic of that magnitude. So he created the special as an illusion, with two possible outcomes in mind.

 

5. The Dark Chick: Doctor Smith and The Nostalgia Chick. Smith will use his army of Spiders as Vyce's secret police, but given his woobie status he'll eventually realise how far things have gone and defect to the good guys. Its pretty obvious that all is not well in the Nostalgia Chick's seemingly idealic home life. Both her and her husband give off a Stepford Smiler vibe, and given his sociopathic nature it's not hard to see her going to the dark side. Worse still, she's secretly been using her career as a director to subtly indoctrinate the public to Vyce's and Joe's will. After his take over she'll become the Goebel to Vyce's Hitler, with only Nella holding her back from crossing the moral Event Horizon. Eventually she's shaken back to her senses when Vyce, in a moment of rage lashes out at Nella, prompting her to switch sides.

 

Not for the Critic, but for Roger. You see, God decided to train Roger for the rigorous job of being an angel. Due to the fall of Satan, all angels need a morality test. Since God was pissed off at the Old Versus New: Ten Commandments video(he took it as the Critic not thinking he was badass), he used the Nostalgia Critic as his target. Roger was unaware that the reality he visited was a world that was already vastly different than our own, and the Nostalgia Critic's non-existence didn't have anything to do with it. It was purposely made deceptively worse than the regular world(Angry Joe is [[President Evil]], Nostalgia Chick is a [[Stepford Smiler]], Linkara is greedy...). And in that reality Roger was God's best friend, and a dead ringer for His replacement. Through this, [[Compressed Vice|Roger's greed and self-serving nature was exposed.]] The [[Big Bad]] in Suburban Knights is the ultimate fate of Roger-banished to the mortal plane as punishment. Alterations in personality are due to Roger being reincarnated over the centuries.

 

== The Room Review ==

 

 

Yes, the Nostalgia Critic exposed the seahorses' intentions to [[Take Over the World]], so naturally the seahorses had to make the video disappear. The disappearance of Obscurus Lupa's review is just the seahorses covering their tracks, and making sure everyone will blame server problems, overzealous lawyers, or other problems. But we're on to you, seahorses! Thanks to the [[Streisand Effect]], lots of people are going to see that video anyway. Your diabolical schemes will never come to fruition!

** A [[Les Collaborateurs|collaborator!]] The future can and must be changed, no matter the cost. To the penguin<ref>one of the seahorses' natural predators</ref> pits with you!

 

 

* [[Straw Fan|Douchey McNitpick]] hacked NC's account?

* The video left of its own accord to get something to eat '''HUH?'''

 

It's been delayed thanks to The Room issue. Seeing as this video will require [[Blatant Lies|"Copyrighted Images"]] from TWO movies it's bound to piss off John, who just got a new job at War Of The Worlds Movies Dot Com. Perfect opportunity to eviscerate him again for The Room issue again.

* Jossed, [[Word of God|he's not going to review it.]]

 

The world peace resulting from Critic's review of Zeus and Roxanne means there is no longer a need for any form of military. The seahorses will attack after a generation or so of peace.

 

That's why even in their time the movie is banned. Wiseau was [[Obfuscating Stupidity]], so no-one notices his fool-proof plan to defeating seahorses is in the movie's coding. He removed it because the seahorses were blackmailing him

 

And The Room is outlawed in the future so that no one will slander Tommy Wiseau's beautiful existence by watching him.

 

Hence why no-one has tried to [[Make Right What Was Once Wrong]]. The seahorses are peaceful rulers, who keep mankind happy. They were only after The Room because they have spent their time eliminating any bad movies. This is the reason why Future Critic is an inventor: without bad movies, he's lost his job.

 

== Other/Multiple ==

 

As Vengeful God. Not exactly happy that He chose love and peace God over badass God, and He and Mako still hasn't gotten over the Sidekicks review. He is also the father of Santa Christ and He's not pleased with fact that the Critic shot him in [[Kickassia]].

 

The Nostalgia Critic was able to do things like kill Santa Christ and shoot at people in a video and nearly kill them. He could even {{spoiler|kill an angel}}. It is more subtle than Linkara's magic gun but it has powers beyond comprehension.

* To add to this, I bet Nostalgia Critic bought his magic gun from the same place Linkara bought his.

** No soul at all. It's the [http://nightside.wikia.com/wiki/Speaking_Gun Speaking Gun] from Simon R. Green's ''Nightside'' series. It can kill both angels and demons and destroys its targets by speaking their true names and removing them from existence. Also, it's sentient and takes over the will of those who use it. The eradications of Mary Poppins and Mickey Mouse, performed by a tearful Critic who just can't stop firing the Gun, tend to support this theory.

 

Will live. They can rebuild him. They have the technology.

 

Because of the Awesome!

* Sadly Jossed.

 

* Three reasons: 1) the Chick's too interested in chasing something she can't have and Nella's not really his type. 2) Vampires (even wannabes) love pale flesh. 3) He had painful-looking hickeys on his neck in both ''Jungle 2 Jungle'' and ''Transformers III'', who else would give them to him?

 

In ''Raiders of the Story Arc: Transformers'', NC mistaked Jazz's voice actor, the late Scatman Crothers, for [[Bill Cosby]] because of how he sounded. He then proceeded to dub Jazz's line with an impression of Cosby. Obviously, fans of Crothers won't take this joke lightly and give NC some harsh emails, like when he made fun of Mako's voice acting in [[Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (film)|TMNT]].

 

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