Serious Business/Real Life: Difference between revisions

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* Competition is more or less a synonym or one-word description of [[Serious Business]] and [["Stop Having Fun!" Guys]] rolled into one. Take anything. Make it competitive. Watch it immediately turn into [[Serious Business]] and cock-measuring as the [["Stop Having Fun!" Guys]] kick out all the people who actually want to have fun with it. Competition can be good...Except that over 90% of it is absolutely ruined by [["Stop Having Fun!" Guys]] who just ''take it way too seriously'' for it to be reminiscent of ''any'' kind of fun, because then they will take on the "Win to live" mentality and treat a simple ''game'' as though it is the most important thing in the world.

** If there is a multiplayer game that is updated regularly to fix exploits and other bug problems, expect the players that take the game seriously to be the first ones that complain about how broken something is or how unbalanced a character/level/set up is unless it gets fixed. Casual players won't give a damn unless the problem is that extreme.

* Computer hardware and software. Tell a Mac user that PCs are better, a PC user that Macs are better, or a Linux user that Macs or Windows are better. Watch the ensuing rant.

** Or even try people that [[You Keep Using That Word|A Macintosh IS a PC]], seeing as "PC" is just an abbreviation for "'''P'''ersonal '''C'''omputer".

** Computer guys are ''infamous'' for this, although for many it has become something of a joke. While Emacs vs. vi (text editors) is the most notable, other rivalries include Intel vs. AMD ([[CPU]] manufacturers), big-endian versus little-endian (how numbers are encoded as bits), every programming language versus every other programming language...

* A blogger known only as [[Xtreme Kool Letterz|"Speedzzter"]] went NUTS after Kyle Busch gave Toyota their first NASCAR Sprint Cup win. [http://speedzzter.blogspot.com/2008/03/day-nascar-died-note-get-latest-truth.html His rant must be read to be believed.]

* In Spain and other Catholic countries, First Communion can be very [[Serious Business]] with the parents of a 7 year old dressing him or her up (if it's a girl, usually as a little bride with an expensive white dress) and throwing a party with catering and flowers, inviting every single relative and wasting money on expensive presents for the child. However, your local priest will be happy if the child has learned the basics of Catholicism in the preparation classes and they only actually need to take Communion for it to "succeed."

* Similarly, Bar/Bat Mitzvahs. By Jewish law, a child attains "adult" status (for religious obligations and privileges) ''automatically'' simply by turning 13 (for boys) or 12 (for girls), no commemoration required (no, not even reading from the Torah). Nevertheless, many parents will spend as much--or more--on a Bar/Bat Mitzvah party as they would on a wedding or, as in the above example, a "decent car." They may even have two or three for ''the same kid'', if there are, for example, relatives living overseas who need to be accommodated.

** Now a days in Mexico girls have three options: a) Have their quinceañera party, b) have a trip to Europe or something, or c) have no party at all (thi is obviously the rarest of the three)

* For that matter, birthday parties in general. Because your three-year-old cares whether or not everyone you know is invited, who baked the cake, how big said cake is, whether you have a moonwalk (which very small children can't even use), pony rides, clowns, magicians, hundreds of expensive presents -- after a while it clearly becomes more about the parents. And don't even mention "My Super Sweet 16" for girls in the U.S., which in some cases could be described as a ''quinceañera'' one year late. For insanely rich people, the big birthdays for parties usually are 1, 5, maybe 10, 13, 16 and probably 18 and 21.

** And some type designers/snobs hate Helvetica too, due to being [[It's Popular, Now It Sucks|overused]] and, as they see it, badly used. They even have a nickname for it, "Helveeta".

** Oh, and most designers hate Papyrus. Its creator, Chris Costello, had dedicated an entire Blogger page (now deleted) to comments about the typeface, as he feels it is the only way he can "clear his name".

** For the curious: Sans is for electronic screens. Serif is for print. Monospace is for consoles/code. <s> That's about as serious as fonts should ever get...</s> If only design were that simple.

*** Actually, both Serif and Sans-Serif (the ''correct'' term) were both for print, with the latter being the more modern (and in some circles, cruder), and both predate screens by several decades at the least. Monospace was invented for Typewriters, as the mechanism can't handle kerning/letter spacing in the same was as moveable type. The attitude listed above is the more modern (i.e. digital age) interpretations, and is obselete in the age of hi-res screens that can depict serif type rather well.

** Rose cultivation in the UK. ''So'' many varieties, ''so'' much effort put into producing new ones. All for a prickly plant that can't even produce its own roots, let alone self-propagate.

* Bird-watching is Serious Business. Actually, to be more accurate, [[Gotta Catch Em All|filling a Life List]] is Serious Business. (Heaven forbid you observe the rare bird and learn more about it and get a better appreciation for the planet's biodiversity; all you really have to do is mark it off the checklist.)

** Partly as a reaction, sports and nature writer Simon Barnes wrote a book titled ''How To Be A Bad Birdwatcher'' - briefly "See a bird, enjoy it." Don't obsess over ticking off a list of them, just appreciate the world.

* The US government brings us MIL-C-44072C, a 26-page military specification for oatmeal cookies and chocolate-covered brownies, complete with percent-by-weight requirements for the ingredients. There's a point to such specifications, of course--because the military has to make hundreds of thousands if not ''millions'' of cookies-and-brownies meals, and each one has to be exactly the same. These recipes are so that they can be made perfectly identical in mass quantities very quickly.

** And as Andy Rooney once ranted, [http://books.google.com/books?id=gTnKjr_BrB0C&pg=PA496#v=onepage&q=&f=false IF IT'S GOT EGGS IN IT, IT'S CUSTARD, NOT ICE CREAM].

* The board game [[Go]] became so popular in Edo period Japan that the state appointed a ''Godokoro'' or Minster of Go. He then founded the Honinbo Go house which specialized in teaching and training Go players. Soon after [[wikipedia:Four go houses|three other state controlled houses]] sprung up. The houses would compete in official games that took place in the shogun's castle, sometimes even in the presence of the shogun himself. Because each house's and individual's prestige was on the line, these games were often intense. The most famous example is the [[wikipedia:Blood-vomiting game|Blood-vomiting game]], which lasted four days and ended with the losing player vomiting blood (and dying months later). [[Serious Business]] indeed.

* On the first Saturday in May, a nation stops for the Kentucky Derby, or at least the South and anywhere with significant equestrian activities or a gambling culture stop. Y'all know what I'm talking about.

** The FREAKING HATS!!

* Celebrity entertainers in general. There are major news networks that are explicitly dedicated to covering celebrity news. Then there's all the other major American news networks who spend too much time covering this kind of news because it gets ratings. People clamber over each other to get pictures, endangering the lives of the celebrities and others. When they aren't being worshiped, their lives are being picked apart and destroyed and they in turn wield influence that far outstrips their insight, particularly in the arena of politics.

* Dividing by zero. Even on our own wiki, at one point.

* [http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/32925695/ns/us_news-education/?GT1=43001 Handwriting] is such serious business that some people actually consider it an art to make words on paper. Never mind what words they actually wrote, whether they used printing or cursive is '''Everything'''.

** Cranked [[Up to Eleven]] in China, where bad handwriting can cost you your job, and more. Chinese writing is exceedingly complex given its ideographic nature so sloppy handwriting can actually make reading Chinese ''impossible''. [[Values Dissonance|To us in the West, however, with our very simple phonetic alphabets, this seems ridiculous]].

* In Europe, collecting the toys inside a Kinder Surprise egg is serious business. They can retail for a bit on eBay and it is ''very'' important you know what series they are from. It is in fact a very complex process to identify what series they are from.

* [http://www.koreus.com/video/jonglage_stylo_doigt.html Pen Flipping]. That is all.

* You like [[Irony]]? You'll love that ''not taking things seriously'' is [[Serious Business]]. You show the slightest bit of emotion on ''anything'', people will tell you to "calm down, it's just X". It gets weird when it's applied to things that are, in fact, serious business, such as the Internet. A good portion of the population spends a lot of time on it, it's a major part of the world economy, and people have been murdered and committed suicide over things that have happened online. The people who mock others with "Internet. Serious business." have a tendency to be [[Hypocrite|hypocrites]]; say something that hits their [[Berserk Button]], and they'll call down fire and brimstone on your head.

** Hypocrisy - Serious Business.

** Most websites ''do'' have a good reason to take art theft seriously; if they have too much on their website, they can be slammed with legal action and disrupted or shut down. As such, art theft generally violates the binding legal agreement the users acceded to when joining the site. DeviantART once said this explicitly, and they still get tons of people submitting work they found online somewhere, or which doesn't meet dA's rules for derivative works.

* The size and position of your office can be a big deal in law firms, especially among people high up the ladder who sometimes get "promoted" to an office with a better view. More generally, any status symbol will become [[Serious Business]] when members of an organization lack other means to establish who has more power that good office means that you have more power in the company then others who are supposed to be your 'equals'. This is doubly true since it's considered poor form (and usually against company policy) to disclose your compensation.

* Ron Paul supporters. Ron Paul ''himself'' is probably a reasonable man, but pick a Ron Paul <s>cultist</s> supporter at random. Perhaps it's an overgeneralization to say ''all'' Ron Paul supporters are <s>overzealous lunatics out of touch with reality</s> [[Rule of Cautious Editing Judgment|very enthusiastic]], but...[[Internet Backdraft|oh, who are we kidding?]]

** Rick Perry too. One troll will say how much they love him and all of a sudden the whole internet is on that guys ass.

** In the late '90s, Warner Brothers went on a copyright-fueled rampage to take down ''any'' [[Buffy]] fansite. Few managed to come out of it unscathed... and ironically, the original TV Tropes Wiki started as a page describing tropes from that very show.

* T-shirts based on memes. [[Internet Backdraft|Cashing in on someone else's work, or creating a piece of merchandise to enhance the profile of a cultural artifact?]] Strangely, there are a lot more people debating this sort of thing than there are debating whether someone should getting paid for fanart. (Getting paid for ''[[Fan Fiction]]'' is generally considered to be a no-no, oddly.)

* Karaoke. There have been ''fights'' over it; [http://www.nytimes.com/2010/02/07/world/asia/07karaoke.html?scp=2&sq=philippines&st=cse one particular song has led to people getting murdered over singing it].

* The "Nika" riots which rocked the Byzantine Empire to its foundations was started... by warring factions of chariot racing fans.

** Hummus is definitely serious business. The axis of the debate used to center on whether hummus is of Jewish or Arab origin. Even many Jews now acknowledge that it was created by Levantine Arabs, so many arguments now focus on methods of preparation. In addition, there is an ongoing fight between chefs in an Israeli and a Lebanese village to create the world's largest hummus. This conflict is more national than ethnic, since Abu Ghosh, the Israeli village, has both Jews and Arabs.

* HTML5 video codecs: H.264 vs Theora. Patent issues abound.

* [[wikipedia:Pisco Sour|Pisco Sour]] is a Peruvian (or Chilean) alcoholic drink that Chileans (or Peruvians) wrongfully claim is theirs, to the point that they actually require people to declare whether they have it on their customs forms, and confiscate the wrong stuff at the airport. Both versions are heavily promoted to tourists and locals, especially at airports, and they will ask tourists eagerly which version they prefer. The correct answer is "this one". They are equally sensitive about ceviche, a fish-based dish that they prepare as if it mattered, with slightly different recipes.

* The side of the border or which land mass you were born in.

** Troops were ordered to fire upon enemy soldiers trying to get this sort of thing going. They didn't always disobey.

** What about humanity being Serious Business in this?

** See also: [[More Dakka]]

** [[World War Two]]: although it is already [[Serious Business]], Germans take it [[Up to Eleven]] due to the fact that it was ''their'' country that started (''and lost'') not one, but ''two'' major international conflicts. It is not unusual for Germans to be easily offended the person has no idea what they're talking about (like, say, the typical American conservative that [[Godwin's Law|equates everything he disagrees with]] [[Hitler Ate Sugar|with Hitler]]). When the person then says contradictory things ("Obama is a Nazi communist"), Europeans (and Germans) will either laugh their asses off or post a [[Wall of Text]] that proves that guy is an idiot. Do not mess with Nazism.

** Arguably it is even worse now between the [[Sony]] [[PlayStation]] brand and the Microsoft [[Xbox]] brand. In the Genesis and SNES generation, console wars took the form of debates children had on the playground during lunch, which admittedly could sometimes result in altercations. However, with the advent of online communication and the low barrier to entry for people who should really know better, the [[GIFT]] has reared its ugly head.

* Weather. Complain that the weather is not right, by your standards? People from other regions will give you so much shit for it.

* Celebrity trials. Consider how many people seriously believed the LAPD was out to get OJ for racial reasons. None of them would bother if it was a random black man.

* Vegetarianism is [[Serious Business]], to the point that in the 90s, [[Animal Wrongs Group|Physicians Committee for Responsible Medicine]] took the lactose issue and ran with it, saying that anything other than a high-carbohydrate vegan diet, emphasizing rice, soy, and palm oil, was racist.

* In Sweden, [[wikipedia:Midsummer#Sweden|Midsummer]] is a ''big deal.''

* On weddings and childbirth, we should include Marital Status. In some communities to be married means instant promotion in profession, living quarters, pay, and/or general level of respect. Often even more so if said couple has a child or children. Curiously, in some of these communities, at least one party to the marriage can be looked down upon for actively pursuing a partner for marriage, with [[Hilarity Ensues|hilarious results]]. Yet in others, ''not'' being married will bring the aforementioned promotions, and marriage itself is socially and/or economically detrimental.

** By contrast, lots of "hardcore" gamers consider Farmville and its clones the death of gaming. [[Ruined FOREVER|Just like the Wii, home consoles, and whatever AAA franchise is top of the charts this week is ruining gaming]].

* Business cards are a very, ''very'' serious...well, business, in Japan. According to Wikipedia: "Business cards should be given and accepted with both hands. It is expected that the cards will immediately be inspected and admired, then placed on the table in front of the receiver for the duration of the meeting. After the meeting, cards should be stored respectfully and should never be placed in a back pocket. You should not write on a business card. If you want to be taken seriously at a business meeting, you must have business cards. When you get them out, they should be in a card holder - not just taken out of your pocket."

** In parts of Scotland, there's historically been a link between football and sectarian rivalries (Protestant v. Catholic) which has sometimes turned nasty. Neil Lennon, the Northern Irish and Catholic manager of Celtic FC was recently sent a parcel bomb and later, bullets, through the post. Although it's unclear whether football fans were involved at all this was widely condemned as anti-Catholic terrorism.

** Spain has also seen football and politics intertwine in the rivalry between Barcelona and Real Madrid, regarded by some of their more fervent supporters as representing Catalan and Castilian nationalism respectively.

* Research, for [[Shown Their Work|fairly]] [[Did Not Do the Research|obvious]] [[They Just Didn't Care|reasons]], is intricately serious business. A detailed work has a paper trail back to reputable sources. All is well, unless, god forbid, a researcher uses [[Wikipedia]] to get a general overview of the subject before delving deeper. Despite Wikipedia being quite possibly the greatest research tool available to mankind ([[Wiki Rule|the wiki format in general, actually]]), many peers will [[Accentuate the Negative]], pointing out that anybody with access to the internet can vandalize a page. (Conversely, anybody can fix vandalism or mistakes, but this is rarely mentioned.) Jumping to the conclusion that no further research was done, peers will ridicule you for not using books or paywalled journals to familiarize yourself with the topic. Basically, [[Elephant in the Living Room|don't tell researchers you use Wikipedia]].

** Problem with Wikipedia (and other sources which are free to change by anyone, to be fair) generally is that no matter what you do, its at best secondary source (usually tetrialy or even higher, being secondary source is actually very rare) which can change between time of writing your work and time of releasing it (so you cant prove you took your data from here and it becomes black hole in argumentation, where you can write anything you want and say "I have source") and very often doesnt link to primary (or secondary) sources. Wikipedia is generally good source for getting basic grasp of theme and often to find links to more reliable places, but it is just too often victim of popularity of wrong data and unreliable in meaning of not stable - you need to be able to refer back to sources years after work is finished.

** Parodied in ''[[Seinfeld]]'', where the library detective hunting down the titular character for a book he didn't return in 1971 (twenty years ago) [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_zePQavforA presents as a standard hard-boiled cop in a trenchcoat].

** And in [[Stephen King]]'s book ''Four Past Midnight'', the novella "The Library Policeman" turns libraries and fines into [[Nightmare Fuel]]. Because Stephen King.

* Power Rangers vs Magirangers. Discussions on which is better devolve into racist insults and cultural posturing.

* People seem to like to meddle with others' personal life such as gay marriages, contraceptive and abortion are all topics of hot debate.

** There's not enough kindling in this world to approximate the amount of flames seen across the board on the official World of Warcraft forums, from classes, class specs, gear, [[The Great Player-Versus-Player Debate|PvE vs PvP]], class changes, nerfs, upcoming nerfs, which classes deserve to be nerfed, and so on and so forth. And that's just the ''official'' forums...

* Maple syrup is very serious to people in Vermont. The state is the leading producer of maple syrup in America and have passed strict laws forbidding companies in the state for using the word maple unless their product contains 100% maple syrup. So when [[McDonald's]] fruit and maple oatmeal debutted in Vermont, residents weren't happy to find out that it contained no maple whatsoever. Needlessly to say, they filled charges against [[McDonald's]].

** She eventually got her job back.

* SAT scores. They are considered the single most important 4 digits of your life.

* ''[[Video Games]]''. Seriously. Just ''try'' telling people you don't give a shit about your stats and are just there to have fun. Immediately watch as everyone calls you a "[[Scrub]]", and try pointing out that once again, video games exist for you to have fun, not compete in something. Watch yourself get flamed out.

** Word of advice: You know that genre, [[MOBA]]? If you want to have fun, it's a pretty safe bet to just only play vs. bots and ''never'' look back. Just about every single [[MOBA]] is ''very'' [[Serious Business]].

* Every state in the union has a Department of Weights and Measures or some equivalent. If you are a shop owner, and you use a scale for trade, like a butcher or a hardware store that sells nails or bolts for X dollars per pound, you need to have your scale certified and inspected by said Department. God help you if they come and do a random inspection, which they do, on something you are selling by weight, length, or volume, and it is not the correct measurement, because they will come for you, they will find you, and they will levy a hefty fine on you. Or just give you a warning. Think its cool to claim that the rubber hose you're selling is a length of twenty-five feet when you know full well its 24 feet and six inches? Think again, buddy. Manufacturers of your bathroom scale are sure to print "Not legal for trade" on it for fear of their wrath. Do not mess with the Department of Weights and Measures.

** [[Older Than Feudalism|This matter is mentioned several times in the Bible.]]

* Black Friday, people have been trampled and stores have had their doors destroyed so thoroughly the metal frame on the slider is bent out of shape. Hope that five dollar coffee machine was worth literally killing someone for.

* [[Brick Joke|Getting the last word.]]