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{{trope}}
[[File:shoephone.jpg|link=Get Smart
{{quote|''His watch is really a radio / His gun, a pen...''<br />
''He knows that it's / all gone, / no mom, / nobody wins.''|'''[[
A classic element of any [[Spy Drama]] or spoof thereof. A spy's [[Plot Technology]] must inevitably be disguised as mundane objects. This can run the gamut from the practical to the ridiculous.
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** And then there's the [[Super Prototype]] that does all that *and* tells time.
*** Don't tell me I got the no-time watch!
* Subverted in, of all things, a [[James Bond (
** Missed the explosion by THIS much!
** Also, there's the classic moment in ''[[
** In ''[[
** And in ''[[
*** Boris, with his [[Nervous Habit]] didn't, and ended up with the [[Stuff Blowing Up|explosive pen]].
* Shaquille O'Neal has a literal shoephone; there's a cellphone embedded in the bottom of the left half of one of his famous Size 22 pairs of shoes. And that's a ''nineties'' cellphone, children.
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* The Bond-spoof ''[[Our Man Flint]]'' has the hero turn down a briefcase full of spy weapons in favor of his cigarette lighter - which had 57 different functions. "58, if you want to light a cigarette."
* Subverted in ''Where The Spies Are'' (1965). The film opens with a KGB briefing on various gadgets used by British agents, which moves to a scene where one such agent is kidnapped by two Russians and uses one of these devices to break free, only to be gunned down as he's running away. Lampshaded in a later scene where the amateur spy played by David Niven runs into a veteran agent and is told to "throw away that rubbish and get yourself a bloody gun."
* Homaged in the action parody ''[[
* Parodied in ''[[The Pink Panther]]'' 2. Steve Martin's Clouseau has a pen disguised as a tape recorder, so he can write down notes without peple noticing.
* In ''[[Casino Royale 1967]]'' James Bond is an old-school gentleman spy who, meeting with the secret service heads of the superpowers, contemptuously ridicules the gadgetry concealed on their persons.
* In ''[[
* Seen in ''[[Iron Man 2]]'' when Whiplash escapes from prison with the help of someone sending him plastic explosives that look like his normal cafeteria food.
{{quote| '''Anonymous Note''': "Enjoy the potatoes."}}
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== Literature ==
* Parodied in the ''[[Discworld]]'' novel ''[[Discworld
* ''[[Doc Savage]]'', the pulp hero of the 1930's and 40's, was famous for his gadgets (which he usually invented himself).
* Late in the ''[[Dark Tower]]'' series by [[Stephen King]], a town full of people under watch develop plate weapons. They look like dinner plates, can be stored in the cabinet, but thrown just right they can take someone's head right off. Don't grab the wrong side.
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** It's not just a baseball bat, Bond, It's a baseball bat with a nail through it!
** Ingenious Q, a bomb that's also a rucksack!
* ''[[
** The shoe phone was used to [[Lampshade Hanging|hang lampshades]] as soon as it was introduced in the series pilot: in one famous sequence, the shoe phone went off in a theatre, breaking any cover Max might have had. In the first season, Max is identified at least once by his ringing shoes.
** A [[Running Gag]] in the show was whenever Max and Siegfried met face to face, the latter would greet him by [[Worthy Opponent|clicking his heels and saluting.]] Max would then do the same, causing an unpleasant "crack" and a loud "DING!" to be heard followed by Max cringing, either from the sound or the fact that he may have broken (another) phone.
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*** Especially funny since one of the [[Running Gag|Running Gags]] was that the Cone of Silence never worked.
** We can't forget the ''Car'' Phone, which had Max accidentally dialing the operator every time he turned the steering wheel. <!-- Is that the exploding paint episode?%% -->
* ''[[The Wild Wild West (TV series)|The Wild Wild West]]'' did it during the Reconstruction era.
* ''[[Mission Impossible (TV series)|Mission Impossible]]'' used it to a lesser degree.
* ''[[The Man
* Such tools were a major part of Joel Hodgson's prop comedy stand-up routine, and therefore made their way into many of the Invention Exchange segments on ''[[Mystery Science Theater 3000]]'' The most outlandish was a submachine gun hidden inside a casserole dish, complete with casserole.
* ''[[Alias (TV series)|Alias]]'' uses this, pretty traditionally, in nearly every episode. However, at least they go to the trouble of designing the gadgets specifically for the mission at hand, or the mission for the gadget, depending on your cynicism. Their "Q" Marshall managed to accidentally set off nearly every one, despite being the one to design them.
* ''[[Ultraman]]'' went one better with the Science Patrol having a standard communicator pin that was even ''smaller'' than the type in ''[[Star Trek:
* [[Stephen Colbert]] once had a shoe phone on ''[[The Colbert Report]]''. It was just a telephone receiver glued to the bottom of a shoe, complete with trailing cord. "Just looking at it, you wouldn't know it was a phone! ... And just wearing it, [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/156748/february-28-2008/cold-war-update you wouldn't know it was a shoe]."
** And in another [[The Great Politics Mess-Up|Cold War Update]], his watch [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/223483/april-02-2009/cold-war-update---russia--cuba---space is also a gun]. You can't tell!
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* Subverted in the ''[[Spooks]]'' episode "Nest of Angels". The Algerian defector played by Alexander Siddig listens politely as [[MI 5]] show him a number of disguised communication/bugging devices for his mission to infiltrate a radical Islamic group. The next scene shows Siddig dumping this highly compromising equipment into a canal.
* ''[[The Equalizer]]'' always used spy gadgets that could be bought commercially in real life.
* ''[[
* In the original live action version of ''[[Johnny Sokko and His Flying Robot]]/[[Giant Robo]]'', Johnny gave orders to the titular robot via a communicator hidden in his wristwatch.
* Darnell from ''[[My Name Is Earl]]'' has been shown to have several pieces of his hair turn out to be phones - they [[This Page Will Self-Destruct|self destruct]] after use.
* ''[[Chuck]]'' has a phone in his wristwatch. He keeps on expecting other gadgets to have hidden uses, but they never do.
* In the ''[[Monty Python's Flying Circus]]'' sketch "The Bishop", the Bishop has a phone embedded in his crosier<ref>(that is, his staff of bishopishness)</ref>.
* In ''[[
* ''[[The Prisoner]]'' episode "The Girl Who Was Death" shows Potter, one of Number 6's fellow spies, undercover as a shoe-shine man. He communicates with HQ via a phone disguised as a polishing brush. ''Almost'' a literal [[Shoe Phone]].
* The game song styles on ''[[Whose Line Is It Anyway?
== Video Games ==
* The Bond-esque ''[[No One Lives Forever]]'' gives Cate Archer a wide array of girly themed destructive items (Mascara laser, hairspray flamethrower, and the like) one could conceal in one's purse.
* The Spy in ''[[
** The [http://www.teamfortress.com/sniper_vs_spy/day04_english.htm "Dapper Rogue" catalogue] also sells things like these. The Camera Beard is also now an unlockable item for the Spy.
* In ''[[Metal Gear Solid 3 Snake Eater]]'' you can pickup a knockout-gas cigarette case, one of the only weapons that can be used when Snake is disguised as an enemy soldier or scientist. It's also strangely effective against two immune-to-bullets bosses near the end of the game.
** Also lampshaded during a discussion between Snake and Major Zero about James Bond, in which Snake comments that (for example) a gun-pen would make him look stupid in the jungle, at which point Zero insists they could build him a gun shaped like a snake, that "folds up into an attache case." In which Snake then replied that it was even sillier (then Zero gets upset at Snake for "Bashing" Bond).
* ''[[Perfect Dark]]'' has a laptop that can turn into a machine gun and a heat-seeking, wall-sticking turret gun. Apparently it has basic computer functions, too.
* ''007: Agent Under Fire'' has a cell phone that also comes with a [[Frickin' Laser Beams|laser]], a password cracker, a switch activator, and a grapple hook that can somehow extend for 10 meters or more. In ''Goldeneye'', Bond's wristwatch serves as the game menu and health/armor indicator and contains a built-in magnet and laser that are used to get out of certain level-specific [[Death Trap|death traps]] in a [[Shout-Out]] to the movies.
* ''[[Splinter Cell]]'' has Sam's wristwatch. Dear God, what '''can't''' it do? It can hack computers, disarm bombs, pick locks, scan eyeballs, get fingerprints from a surface, playback voices for getting into voice-locks, show a map with the locations of bad guys, and operate as a standalone computer for storing files and the like. ''In a goddamn watch.'' Granted, you ''are'' the [[The Ace|best spy the NSA has.]]
* These compose [[Ratchet and Clank|Clank's]] armaments in ''[[
== Webcomics ==
* The [[Gender Bender|T-Girls]] of ''[[Jet Dream (
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* ''[[The Venture Brothers]]'' -- Brock throws away his disguised spy-gear in disgust in "Assassinanny 911", claiming it either never works right or is outright useless. He's especially disappointed that the cigarettes he's issued aren't real ones for smoking. In flashback, he almost eats a baguette, but is stopped by his fellow agent who warns him "Do not eat that! That is C4!.
** The heroes however ''do'' have video phones in their watches. Dr. Venture's brother JJ does him one better by hiding a phone in the collar of his shirt, allowing him to use it even if he is captured and tied up.
* Parodied in the ''[[Ed, Edd 'n' Eddy]]'' episode "In Like Ed". The Eds have somehow become convinced Kevin is spying on the other kids in the neighborhood, and Edd starts preparing spy-gear, including listening devices disguised as household objects and a smoke bomb disguised as a jawbreaker. Ed finds a coathanger, and asks:
{{quote| '''Ed''': What's this do, Double-Dee?<br />
'''Edd''': That's just a coat hanger, Ed.<br />
'''Ed''': Oh... mum's the word. }}
* ''[[Thunderbirds]]'' does this all the time. The boys all wear communicator watches, there are the portraits that they use to speak through and even light-up drink straws when they want to subtly attract someone's attention. Lady Penelope has a teapot communicator as well as a powder compact one. And probably many more examples this editor has forgotten.
* Both ''[[
* Inverted in ''[[The Tick]]''. When he first enters Arthur's apartment, Tick nearly tears the place apart looking for the switch that activates his secret crime lab. Of course, there isn't one. In the comic book, this leads to the rather awkward question of why Arthur would invite a large, muscular man in tight spandex up to his apartment in the first place.
* Butch has a radio concealed in his ring in ''[[Butch Cassidy and
* ''[[Aeon Flux]]'' has a few. Trevor Goodchild owns a golden cigarette case that transforms into a pistol. Aeon herself has a self-destruct mechanism hidden in her backback that goes off <s> if</s> whenever she dies to prevent enemies from looting her corpse & a gimmick tooth with a small compartment in it.
* Parodied on the ''[[
** Not to mention Spongebob's 'coin operated' pants-phone.
* ''[[Johnny Bravo]]'' uses these in its spy parody episode "Bravo, James Bravo". Includes a (weak) laser hidden in a mirror and a bomb-comb.
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