The Masterson Inheritance/Funny
- Paul Merton's characters often go on "logical" rants that are hilarious.
- From Scurvy!, where Robert Masterson (Paul Merton) explains to Comely Catherine (Josie Lawrence) why he's leaving England:
Robert Masterson: I'm a gambler – don't you understand, everything is a gamble to me, life is a gamble! That seagull over there? I mean to bet that that seagull will reach land before we do. |
- From The Mastersons' Magical Marquee, where the villains of the episode, Reverend Ashdown (Paul Merton) and Lucinda Scott-Moncrieff (Lee Simpson), are plotting to get rid of the traveling circus:
Lucinda: But Reverend, we must have a plan! We must destroy them! We must make sure the circus never leaves Ampleforth! |
- Peaks in the unaired The Marooned Mastersons, where Paul Merton, playing the character of Tarquin Masterson, keeps blurting out nonsensical or offensive phrases and going on extended rants just to tick off the narrator (Josie Lawrence) by keeping her from switching to another scene. In one instance it leads to Tarquin jumping his father and shouting "I LOVE YOU, DADDY!", followed by an excaggerated make-out session. Later in the episode, when it looks like he might fall for another of the male characters, this happens:
Tarquin: I might as well tell you, I've had sex with me own Dad since I've been here. I'm not proud --! Give us a kiss, and you'll never have to strop yourself ever again. |