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[[File:TotalBiscuit at IGN ProLeague Season 5 - 43.jpg|thumb]]
'''John Bain''', better known by his screen name [[
▲AKA Total [[Discworld|Biscuit]]; [[World of Warcraft|Total Halibut;]] [[DC Universe Online|Dark Halibut]]; [[Awesome McCoolname|John Bain]].
During his time with
▲John Bain, better known by his screen name [[Total Biscuit]], is a British-born creator of [[YouTube]] video reviews and commentary. He does fast-paced ''[[Starcraft II]]'' Multiplayer commentary, first-impression videos of indie games on [[Steam]] and other digital-distribution platforms through a series known as ''WTF is...'', and collaborations with other channels, such as co-op playthroughs of ''[[Magicka]]'' and ''[[Trine]] 2'' with the [[Yogscast]] guys and a ''[[Terraria]]'' series with Jesse Cox of [[OMF Gcata]].
As a bit of Trivia,
▲During his time with [[Wow Radio]], [[Total Biscuit]] hosted a few shows - Dungeon Master (a short-lived non-intensive raid guide), Titan, TB's Show About Videogames and EPIC! - but, in the world of podcasts, he is best known for both his "shock-jock"-inspired persona and ''Blue Plz'', a ''[[World of Warcraft]]'' weekly podcast, ''Cataclysm'' expansion beta (and afterward, published content) playthroughs with commentary, and daily updates of "WoW news and content" through his ''Azeroth Daily'' videos. He discontinued his regular ''[[World of Warcraft]]'' videos as of May 2011 and, although he continued it for a few weeks afterwards, has confirmed that ''Blue Plz'' is "done for good" as well. He has also done 27 videos of an ambitious [[Let's Play]] for ''[[Shining Force III]]'', and had been embarking on a playthrough of ''[[DC Universe Online]]'' after a handful of beta content videos were well-received on his channel.
▲As a bit of Trivia, [[Total Biscuit]] has been said by the [[Yogscast]] to own ''every'' game on [[Steam]] <ref>Not actually true.</ref>. Lewis and friends might be right, considering his "WTF..." series and his [[Steam]] account's [http://www.steamcalculator.com/id/TotalBiscuit worth]. Said amount doesn't account for his non-[[Steam]] purchases on Gamer's Gate and Amazon, either: Regardless of the hyperbole, TB is ''very'' influential as a gamer, often getting contacted by Indie developers to showcast new games and interviewing triple-A developers alike.
On May 24, 2018, he passed away after a long battle with cancer.
▲You can find his [[YouTube]] channel here, [http://www.youtube.com/user/TotalHalibut TotalHalibut], and his Web site [http://www.cynicalbrit.com/ here]. In August of 2011, he created another [[YouTube]] channel, [http://www.youtube.com/user/TotalBiscuit TotalBiscuit], which he will use to host exclusively ''[[Starcraft II]]'' content. He is yet another member of [[The Game Station]].
[[I Thought It Meant|Not to be confused with]] [[The Mean Brit]] <ref>Though, if game developing was the topic of a [[Reality Show]], TB would ''definitely'' be the [[Mean Brit]]</ref>. Or [[Zero Punctuation|a certain OTHER cynical Brit]]. Or [[The Spiffing Brit]].
{{creatortropes}}
* [[Aborted Arc|Aborted Video]]: He said he'd give a WTF is... of [[Street Fighter|Super Street Fighter 4: Arcade Edition]] in his Dannish Inquisition episode, he hasn't.
* [[Accidental Innuendo]]: He does this from time to time, at which point either he or someone he is playing/casting with will inevitably tell people not to look into it.
{{quote|
'''TB during his WTF is of Binary Domain:''' You will notice the camera is sort of jerking off to one side or another - ''no not like that'', jerking off ''to one side'' - [[Genre Savvy|no, this is not going to sound good regardless of how I say it, let's just abandon that sentence.]] }}
* [[And That's Terrible]]: During one of the Dead Rising 2: Broken Record videos
{{quote|
* [[Angrish]]: Lapses into this when playing [[Nintendo Hard|punishingly difficult]] games such as ''[[Jamestown: Legend of the Lost Colony|Jamestown]]'' and ''[[Meat Boy|Super Meat Boy]]''.
** In ''[[Terraria]]'', Angrish is apparently "Hell-ese" and TB is very fluent in it, [[Crowning Moment of Funny|though it mostly involves asking for cooking ingredients]].
** At the end of his WTF is The Tiny Bang Story video he actually resumes recording after the designated end and almost [http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=16qZtnqUleU#t=2825s immediately descends into this.]
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** Top hats and monocles appear to be high on his agenda.
** While the monocle isn't (yet), TB ''does'' wear a top hat on "official" videos in which his face is shown. The most recent example of this (as of September 2011) would be his coverage of the [[Games Com]] show.
** TB's a big [[Terry Pratchett]] fan, sometimes encouraging people to read the books. The origin of his name? From the book ''[[
* [[Awesome McCoolname]]: John {{
* [[Badass]]: See the entry for Gotham City Imposters in his CMOA page.
** [[Badass Boast]]: he gives one during said aforementioned video on Gotham City Imposters.
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** [[Badass Moustache]]
** [[Memetic Badass]]: Invoked. Jesse is ''incredibly'' flattering towards TB during their ''[[Terraria]]'' [[Let's Play]], among other situations.
{{quote|
'''TB''': Ah, so you do follow my Twitter. }}
* [[Berserk Button]]:
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** Has a bit of a trigger finger on banning [[Fan Dumb]] -- both his own and that of others. It doesn't matter if you like his videos, you love kittens or you like [[My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic|Ponies]] -- if you're being a dick about what you like, you will piss him off.
** Also, don't touch his hat, as [http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=drAi35ipbnA#t=1271s Jesse found out] the hard way in ''[[Terraria]]''.
** [[Punctuated!
** Newest one... Moogles, which make [[Total Biscuit]] punch a kitten.
*** Chocobo~...
** His biggest one yet: Do not, under any circumstance, question TB's morals as a commentator and as a game consumer. Nearly an hour of [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bfuptVs94_U the fourth GameStation podcast] was devoted to a debate/shouting contest between Jesse and TB on this. Jesse had to sleep on the couch.
* [[Blonde, Brunette, Redhead]]: Male Version. The 6th Podcast has [[
* [[Brutal Honesty]]: Comes hand in hand with the [[Caustic Critic]] trope, don't expect him to soften the blow when picking faults.
{{quote|
* [[The Cameo]]:
** As pointed out by TB and Jesse in their Q & A video together on [[
** Simon (Honeydew) decides to finally add [[Total Biscuit]] to his [[Steam]] friends list during one of his ''[[Terraria]]'' livestreams.
** Another one where he cameos during the [[Yogscast]]'s Earth Defense Force Livestream (audio only as the video is game footage). Notable of reducing Sips to a blithering fanboy.
{{quote|
'''TB:''' Um...
* TB chats for a while then leaves*
'''Sips:''' He probably thinks I'm a weird fanboy now... }}
** And now Lewis is a cute necromancer girl followed by 4 meatpatchworked monsters while TB is a furry with a charrzooka and stabby stabby daggers in the [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A8-9VEvAmFg&t=28m GW2 beta].
{{quote|
* [[Catch Phrase]]: Numerous. Some of the most frequent ones seem to be more along the lines of a [[Verbal Tic]], in fact.
** "Fire ze missiles!"
** "Im Working on it."
** "Yes indeed.."
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** "I can tell you that for a fact."
* [[Catchphrase Interruptus]]:
{{quote|
** He also reference the trope by name during WTF is Dustforce.
* [[Can't Hold His Liquor]]: During [[And the Fandom Rejoiced|the Star Wars Kinect Dance Off]] and the 14th podcast, TB visibly drinks the least amount of Champagne among the three of them, but looks even more drunk than Jesse (downed his whole bottle, yet only acts slightly more silly than usual) and Dodger (almost finished her bottle and does not look drunk at all).
* [[Caustic Critic]]: At times, but less often than the name "Cynical Brit" would suggest. He's actually quite fair, and often finds something to appreciate even in a game he doesn't like.
* [[Comically Missing the Point]]: Upon going to Paris and witnessing the Eiffel Tower lit up, his reply is this:
{{quote|
* [[Cuteness Proximity]]: He's not usually a victim of this, but then the Popori appeared. "[[Tera Online|IT'S A BEAVER]]!"
** That said, this trope is possibly parodied for the most part. There have been quite a few times where he said something that isn't stereotypically cute (like the skull in [[Warhammer 40,000: Space Marine]]) being adorable.
** One instance of this happened during Easter Day where his twitter avatar became a cute rabbit, followed up by him [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LEcYkZhlVlc linking to bunny videos on youtube] and posting random cute bunny pictures throughout the day. Subscribers and followers of his Twitter had a [[Wild Mass Guessing]] about whether he was momentarily possessed, drunk, sad, hungry for rabbit meat, [[Trolling]], if it was his wife, or if he had a soft spot for bunnies.
{{quote|
* [[Deadpan Snarker]]: While playing ''[[Magicka]]'' with Lewis and Simon of the [[Yogscast]].
** To be fair, he is this quite often, even outside of his videogaming.
* [[Determinator]]: He can be quite persistent in his efforts to complete a task set before him, be it by a game or by a person.
{{quote|
* [[Double Take]]: During his WTF is [[Darkspore]].
{{quote|
* [[Epic Fail]]: [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T5a09JVXoxs&feature=feedu#t=3m17s This Terraria video]
* [[Everything Trying to Kill You]]: During his multiplayer WTF of Section 8: Prejudice, he gets killed by an elevator slamming him into the edge of the door.
{{quote|
** Also during his Halloween playthrough of ''[[Amnesia: The Dark Descent|Amnesia the Dark Descent]]'':
{{quote|
* [[Evil Laugh]]: [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N_yJiOD7qJ8&feature=feedlik#t=21m36s Just listen to that laugh!]
** [[Face Heel Turn|DarkHalibut]] gets a pretty good, hammy "super-villain" one in the beginning of [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3UVnOxeYl8A this] video.
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* [[Flat What]]: TB's reaction to Jesse's revelation in ''Terraria'' that their fans have made [[Gender Flip]] slashfic.
* [[Godwin's Law]]: Played straight and [[Lampshaded]] in his Mailbox for February 15, 2012:
{{quote|
* [[Heroic Comedic Sociopath]]: A portion of his humor, especially in the Terraria LP.
* [[Hoist by His Own Petard]]: The trope name was actually name dropped in his [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Teb0vJ3qXQk&feature=uploademail March 21, 2012 Mailbox.]
* [[Hypocritical Humor]]: Emphasis on humor. He has a personal disdain of [[Let's Play|Let's Plays]] because he finds them devoid of creativity, but his [[Let's Play|Let's Plays]] with the [[Yogscast]] and [[
* [[Insistent Terminology]]:
** [[Running Gag|He doesn't do reviews -- he does FIRST IMPRESSIONS.]]
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* [[Jerk with a Heart of Gold]]: He can be a bit of a jerk sometimes, but his criticisms are all well meaning, and he does do work that's completely for charity.
* [[Large Ham]]: He tends to seemingly overreact to certain things.
{{quote|
"Oh, you have a [[Star Craft 2|viking]], uh, that's adorable... ''[[Wave Motion Gun|YAMATO CANNON]]!!!'' BOOM!! [[Captain Obvious|You don't have a viking anymore]]." }}
* [[Leitmotif]]: [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DuxPVa4OnQ8 The Ballad of TotalBiscuit], also available in [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xWqzfLpKe5M shortened version], played during the ending of most of his videos. He originally used [[Pirates of the Caribbean|He's a Pirate]], until he was asked not to for copyright issues. The artist then made the ballad using a similar melody.
** [[Fan Nickname]]: There is an ongoing petition to rename the song ''Monocle (and/or) Top Hat of Destiny''.
* [[Literalist Snarking]]: Along with [[Deadpan Snarker]], usually towards some stupid question already answered by him.
{{quote|
'''TB''': Finns. }}
* [[Madness Mantra]]: During his WTF is of [[Lone Survivor]].
{{quote|
* [[The Mean Brit]]
* [[Missing Episode]]: The three lost ''[[Terraria]]'' videos. All of them had the videos lost (the second and third by accidental deletion on TB's part) but the audio saved, and TB has released the second and third lost episodes (meant to be before episode 32) as an [http://www.cynicalbrit.com/audio/terraria_lostepisodes.mp3 audio podcast]. The first one, meant to be before episode 13, has not been released, though.
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* [[One of Us]]:
** He mentions Tvtropes on [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cu_TiBM6SkY&list=WL3D008C1266C33E77&index=2&feature=plpp_video the first episode] of the [[The Game Station|GameStation]] podcast, as well as dropping trope names in other videos, including the second episode of aforementioned podcast.
** He's also a registered Troper, mentioning that he reads TV Tropes quite a bit in the Febuary 15th, 2012 Mailbox and references his page ([[And Zoidberg|as well as]] [[
** The [[Rule of Three|third time]] is during the 14th podcast, where he rather proudly declares himself a [[Snark Knight]].
* [[Only in It For the Money]]: Averted, he thoroughly enjoys doing his work (The [[Fan Dumb]] that comes with it, not so much), and is not above doing charity work and donating to charity. Of course he has to earn a living from his work, but money is not the primary motivator.
{{quote|
* [[Podcast]]:
** Has done numerous "classic" radio shows and podcasts; the most notable one, also discontinued shortly after quitting ''[[World of Warcraft]]'', was "Blue Plz".
** One of the regular hosts of The Gamestation's podcast alongside [[
* [[Precision F-Strike]]: At the end of his video ''WTF is [[
{{quote|
** In fact, pretty much any use of profanity on TB's part (outside videos containing "spur-of-the-moment" reactions such as his Hallowe'en special on Amnesia: The Dark Descent or daily VoDs of his raw I Suck At Starcraft stream) - due to its irregularity, even despite his tendency to rant/be cynical - could be considered one of these.
** Subverted in his ''[[Meat Boy|Super Meat Boy]]'' video:
{{quote|
** He outright stated during a ''[[League of Legends]]'' livestream that it wouldn't be going up on his [[YouTube]] channel ''because'' he was swearing so much. It would go against his personal expectations when it comes to the quality of his videos.
* [[Rousing Speech]]: He's a [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K8JeYIWQgrE surprisingly good] speaker.
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** Earlier, he Simon and Lewis had issues with explosives (a spell combination Simon discovered, which they began calling "ARSE Mines" after the keys needed to cast it) in their [[Magicka]] series with the [[Yogscast]].
** There's also the completely unrelated matter of TB describing games he enjoys as simulators:
{{quote|
''[[Nitronic Rush]]'': The premier car breakdancing simulator!
''[[Limbo]]'': The premier get-stabbed-by-shadowy-spider simulator!
''[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v{{=}}_cxM5UIsAnE Envirobear2000]'': The premier bear driving simulator!
''[[Orcs Must Die]]'': The premier orc stabbing and trap placing simulator!
''[[Journey (2012 video game)|Journey]]'': The premier cloth flying simulator! }}
** A Meta-example: Whenever a [[YouTube]] Video receives recognition from TB (via a Like or share on his channel), expect one of the top liked comments to be some variation of "The Cynical Fleet as Arrived" because of the legion of TB fans watching the video.
*** This originated from TB's tendency of 1-base Battlecruiser-rushing on ''[[
*** A variation of this is "A [[Total Biscuit]] army is approaching from the west!", derived from the Terraria in-game message 'A goblin army is approaching from the west/east!'
** [[Total Biscuit]] pronouncing M. Night Shyamalan as Shyamalalalal.
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** Hell, he's pretty much the [[Straight Man]] to the entire Game Station. Which says a lot about the Game Station.
** He [[Lampshade Hanging|lampshaded]] it himself in the Terraria series.
{{quote|
'''Jesse:''' "I dunno if I'd call you the straight guy! '''HEY-O!'''"
'''TB:''' ''*Disgusted Sigh*'' }}
* [[The Snark Knight]]: He appears to have a worldly disdain for anything and anyone around him, including some of his closest e-friends.
* [[Stupid Statement Dance Mix]]: More like [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j190cYqxD_w Awesome Statements' Dance Mix], though...brought to you by the same man who made [[
** [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tiHcLEXmMO0 And now with one of his podcasts.]
* [[The Spock|Superego]]: In a [[Freudian Trio]] with Lewis's [[The Kirk|ego]] and Simon's [[The McCoy|id]] in the ''[[Magicka]]'' and ''[[Trine]] 2'' videos.
* [[Totally Radical]]: Occasionally attempts this ironically, with [[Pretty Fly for a White Guy|predictable results.]]
{{quote|
'''Jesse:''' That... that is... no. No. Never - on behalf of the world, no. Don't spit for us. }}
* [[Troll]]: Towards Simon of the [[Yogscast]] in ''[[Magicka]]'' and to a lesser extent ''[[Trine]] 2''.
* [[True Art Is Incomprehensible]]: [[Discussed]] in-universe when playing ''[[The Binding of Isaac]]''
* [[Verbal Tic]]: Overlaps with [[Angrish]]. His version of distinct from others. It sounds like a weird combination of a squeak, squawk and screech.
* [[Viewer Gender Confusion]]: Initially thinks the Mechanic in ''[[Terraria]]'' is male.
* [[Vitriolic Best Buds]]: With Jesse Cox of [[
** [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0FYEo_FUK2w Now in song form...]
** He gets along pretty well with Lewis of the [[Yogscast]]. Simon? Not so much.
* [[Weaksauce Weakness]]: Or more to the point, ''[[Why Did It Have to Be Snakes?|Why did it have to be puzzle games (or any game that requires puzzle-solving skills)]]''?? TB is Dyspraxic, which according to a comment, ''is a motor learning difficulty that can affect planning of movements and coordination as a result of brain messages not being accurately transmitted to the body'', which means it takes TB around twice as long to solve puzzles as someone who doesn't have this.
** Despite this, he seems to really like [[Super Meat Boy]], which is hard enough already for a person without dyspraxia!
* [[We Sell Everything]]: [[Discussed]] and basically ranted about in Part 4 of his ''[[Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning]]'' [http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=_JITD7sbVWU#t=277s livestream].
* [[Why Fandom Can't Have Nice Things]]:
** Will never ''ever'' post a ''[[Minecraft]]'' video due to the [[Fan Dumb]]: According to TB, once you go ''[[Minecraft]]'', you never go back because of never ending fan demand. Funny enough, his wife, Intricacy, had her first Cynical Brit Community News video with ''[[Minecraft]]'' in the background, even lampshading how she's going against TB's "no ''[[Minecraft]]''" rule.
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** TB no longer reads the [[YouTube]] comments in his videos because of the sheer amount of stupidity that resides there. He used to read them, but blocked them on his personal computer after his doctor told him they had ''given him stress-related illness''. Now, his volunteer mods and his wife read them for him and relay the best and most frequent comments. Whenever he does occasionally read and respond to comments, it is like seeing chum thrown into a shark pool.
** At this stage, the ''[[Skyrim]]'' community is nearing this point aswell, as despite having stated on several occasions that he will not do ''[[Skyrim]]'' content (because he wouldn't be able to live up to the standard for content on his page, and also because everyone and their mother is doing it), he still gets tweets, [[Facebook]] messages and [[YouTube]] comments on whether or not he will do a ''WTF is...'' ''[[Skyrim]]''.
* [[Younger Than They Look]]: If you estimate using his voice and the way he looks without his [[Nice Hat]] on [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0X9aGdI2-Gc here] and [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qp4SQVkkZ0Q here], it's easy to forget that he's 28 and actually younger than [[Yogscast|Simon Lane (34), Lewis Brindley (29)]] and [[
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