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"The Reason You Suck" Speech/Literature: Difference between revisions
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* In ''[[Nineteen Eighty
{{quote| "We have beaten you, Winston. We have broken you up. You have seen what your body is like. Your mind is in the same state. I do not think there can be much pride left in you. You have been kicked and flogged and insulted, you have screamed with pain, you have rolled around the floor in your own blood and vomit. You have whimpered for mercy, you have betrayed everybody and everything. Can you think of a single degradation that has not happened to you?"}}
* [[Big Bad|The White Witch]] gives one of these to Aslan in ''[[The Lion the Witch And The Wardrobe]]'', just before killing him.
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* In the ''[[Harry Potter]]'' series, Voldemort has something of a talent for these. He gives one to Harry in ''The Chamber of Secrets'', one to Harry and all of his Death Eaters in ''The Goblet of Fire'', one to Dumbledore AND Bellatrix in ''Order of the Phoenix'' and one to pretty much everyone in ''The Deathly Hallows''.
** Especially Ron. He gave Ron a "Reason You Suck Speech" pretty much everyday when he was wearing the horcrux. Then it kinda climaxed, into a ghostly image of Hermione not only telling him every reason he sucks, but every reason he's afraid he ''might'' suck.
** Dumbledore does this to Voldemort a little in ''[[Harry Potter (Franchise)/Harry Potter and The Order of The Phoenix|Order of the Phoenix]]''. [[Harry Potter (Franchise)/Awesome|Then Harry goes and tops it in]] ''[[Harry Potter (Franchise)/Harry Potter and
** In the latter case, it's immediately on the heels of '''Voldemort's''' [[Reason You Suck Speech]].
* Glaurung the father of dragons delivers a '''phenomenal''' one to [[Anti
{{quote| '''Glaurung:''' Evil have been thy ways, son of Hurin. Thankless fosterling, outlaw, slayer of thy friend, thief of love, usurper of Nargothrond, captain foolhardy and deserter of thy kin. As thralls thy mother and sister live in Dor-lomin, in misery and want. Thou art arrayed as prince, but they go in rags; and for thee they yearn, but thou carest not for that. Glad may thy father be to learn that he hath such a son; as learn he shall. }}
* These happen quite a lot in the ''[[Skulduggery Pleasant (Literature)|Skulduggery Pleasant]]'' series. [[Magnificent Bastard|Nefarian Serpine]] enjoys giving them regularly to Skulduggery in the first book, Baron Vengeous gives a few to Skulduggery in ''Playing With Fire'' and gets two particularly savage ones for China Sorrows.
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* [[Magnificent Bastard|Valentine Morgenstern]] gives [[Evil Chancellor|Imogen Herondale]] a deservedly savage and scathing one that results in her almost having a [[Villainous Breakdown|nervous breakdown]].
* {{spoiler|Ender}} gives a very nice one to {{spoiler|Bonzo Madrid}} in [[Ender's Game]].
{{quote| ''' {{spoiler|Ender}}''': {{spoiler|Bonzo}}, [["Well Done, Son" Guy|your father would be proud of you]]. [[Sarcasm Mode|He would love to see you now]], come to fight a naked boy in a shower, smaller than you, and you brought six friends. He would say, [[Honor Before Reason|Oh, what honor]]. Be proud, {{spoiler|Bonito}}, pretty boy. You can go home and tell your father, Yes, I beat up {{spoiler|Ender Wiggin}}, who was barely ten years old, and I was thirteen. And I had only six of my friends to help me, and somehow we managed to defeat him, even though he was naked and wet and alone - {{spoiler|Ender Wiggin}} is so ''dangerous'' and ''terrifying'' it was all we could do not to bring two hundred.}}
** {{spoiler|The speech saves his life.}}
* In ''Dreaming of Amelia'' by Jaclyn Moriarty, one of the main characters, Emily, wants to do Law at university. For this she needs a signed form from her principal, but she hasn't got it back. She finally works up the courage to go see him...
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{{quote| '''Mr Ludovico''': In the last few weeks, my school has been overrun with hysteria about your ghost. Students are refusing to enter the Art Rooms. Teachers can't get their students to concentrate. You have infected my entire student body with your childishness. There is no ghost, and yet, if I didn't sign this form, your parents would be in this office in an instant. Taking some kind of legal action, no doubt. Not letting me get away with it! Protecting their little girl! I always intended to sign it. Just thought I might try to teach you something about the real world first. Help you to grow up a little. But now I see you're a lost cause.}}
* During the climax of ''[[The Name of the Rose (Literature)|The Name of the Rose]],'' William of Baskerville unleashes one of these on {{spoiler|Jorge of Burgos}} following his [[Motive Rant]] against laughter.
{{quote| You are the Devil. Yes. They lied to you. The Devil is not the Prince of Matter; the Devil is the arrogance of the spirit, faith without smile, truth that is never seized by doubt. The Devil is grim because he knows where he is going, and in moving, he always returns whence he came. You are the Devil, and like the Devil, you live in darkness. [[Shut UP, Hannibal|If you wanted to convince me, you have failed.]] I hate you, {{spoiler|Jorge}}, and if I could, I would lead you downstairs, across the grounds, naked, with feathers stuck in your asshole and your face painted like a juggler and a buffoon, so that the whole monastery would laugh at you and be afraid no longer. I would like to smear honey all over you and roll you in feathers and take you on a leash to fairs, to say to all: He was announcing the truth to you and telling you that the truth has the taste of death, and you believed not in his words but in his grimness. And now I say to you that in the infinite whirl of possible things, God allows you to imagine a world where the presumed interpreter of the truth is nothing more than a clumsy raven who repeats words learned long ago.}}
* ''[[Pride and Prejudice]]'' gives us one from Elizabeth Bennet to Mr. Darcy. And boy does it ''burn.''
** Elizabeth also recieves one from Lady Catherine. It's burn is...signifigantly less.
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* ''[[Everworld]]'': Senna Wales dishes these out like they're going out of style. Jalil, [[The Smart Guy]], recognises this, [[Hangs a Lampshade]] on it, and deconstructs one of her speeches point for point. He and Merlin the Magnificent team up to give Senna a joint The Reason You Suck Speech in Book 11.
* ''[[An Elegy for The Still Living]]'': Francis delivers one of these to himself near the end. He does not feel too cheerful afterward.
* [[The Remains of the Day]]: At the end of the book, Stevens at last can articulate the truth in a [["The Reason You Suck" Speech|The Reason We Suck Speech]] for Lord Darlington and himself. Lord Darlington played [[Head in The Sand Management]] for the Nazis, and at the end of the day, he can say he was wrong and take the responsibility like a man. [[Shrinking Violet|Stevens never did anything for himself]], [[Tear Jerker|and he cannot say even that]].
* In ''The Fox in the Chicken Coop'' by [[Ephraim Kishon]]. The [[Yes Man]] finally snaps and calls the politician out on his incompetence, how he still doesn't leave politics to make room for someone else, [[Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking|and the stupid joke he always tells.]]
* In ''[[Warrior Cats (Literature)|Warrior Cats]]'', after her sister Ivypool pushes one too many of her [[Berserk Button]]s, Dovewing tells Ivypool exactly why she thinks Ivypool is a terrible cat who deserves to rot in the deepest corners of the Dark Forest for all eternity.
** Squirrelflight also gives one to Jayfeather in Faded Echoes after he treats her and Leafpool like crap for two books straight.
** Leafstar gives one [["The Reason You Suck" Speech]] of her own to Sol in ''After The Flood'' when he steals her kits just so he could become a warrior.
* In the first ''[[Dragonriders of Pern]]'' novel ''Dragonflight'', Masterharper Robinton delivers a scathing one to the Lord Holders when they complain that Benden Weyr is asserting too much authority over them in the fight against Thread. Robinton reminds the Lord Holders that most of them treated Benden Weyr like crap for centuries and recently ''rode out to attack the Weyr'' because they thought there were no more Threads. Robinton then says that Benden has every right to leave the Holds to be eaten by Thread after all of that, and that the Lord Holders should shut up and do whatever the Weyrleader thinks is necessary to survive the return of the Threads. The speech makes F'lar ''very'' grateful that Masterharper Robinton is an ally of Benden Weyr and not an enemy.
* Aftran does "the reason you humans as a whole suck" speech in ''[[Animorphs (Literature)|Animorphs]]'', when she's talking to Cassie in "The Departure". She tells Cassie how humans suck because they don't appreciate the beauty of the world they live in and that they complain about the Yeerks enslaving them, but they do the same thing to their own livestock.
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