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"The Reason You Suck" Speech: Difference between revisions
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{{trope}}
{{quote|''"I always wondered what kind of person could do such a thing. But now that I see you, I think I understand. There’s just nothing inside you. Nothing at all. You’re pathetic and sad and empty."''|'''Katara''', ''[[
Not only has [[Big Bad]] tried to kill your girlfriend/boyfriend, slain the [[Team Pet
Frequently a particular brand of [[Evil Gloating]] and/or [[Breaking Them By Talking]]; it's a lot like the [[Hannibal Lecture]], except in this case the Villain clearly has done something that would seem to suggest he (the bad guy) really is the superior combatant; e.g. the hero has just been punched through a wall and is pinned under rubble as the Villain stands over him with a gun.
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Heroes can also give defeated villains [["The Reason You Suck" Speech]]es, often pointing out their [[Cut Lex Luthor a Check|wasted potential]] or how their obsession with [[Revenge Before Reason|defeating the hero has ruined them]], or in the case of the [[Well-Intentioned Extremist]] adversary, how [[He Who Fights Monsters|they've become everything they've fought against]], or how their [[Utopia Justifies the Means|extremes in trying to bring a better world]] [[Nice Job Breaking It, Hero|have done more to ruin it]]. Heroic "'Reason You Suck' Speeches" come out when the hero's not going to bother with the [[Kirk Summation]] or trying to persuade their foe. Chances are, they tried the diplomatic option, and it didn't sink in.
Alternatively, the speech is given by someone who's just frustrated with the other person. This is not an attempt bring down or break an opponent. This is not an exchange between heroes and villains (heck, they might even be friends). This is someone, tired of everything they have to deal with, giving a frank and [[Brutal Honesty|brutally honest]] assessment of the person they're dealing with, often in a [[What the Hell, Hero?]] moment. This can be [[Insult Backfire|prone to backfire]] with a suitably shallow, self-obsessed, and/or [[Genre Savvy]] target; who typically responds with [[Red Dwarf
Compare to [[Calling the Old Man Out]]. Could also be a [[Take That Scrappy]] where someone tells a hated character what the audience feels about them.
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* Through 2011 and into 2012, [[Corrupt Corporate Executive|John Laurinaitis]] has been getting under the skin of most of the Raw roster. One person especially who has never liked "Big Johnny" would be [[CM Punk]]. Heading into the ''Royal Rumble'' pay-per-view, Punk has been having problems with Laurinaitis of the [[Stop Helping Me!]] variety, which finally came to a head on the January 16, 2012 ''Raw'' with a beautiful TRYSS which made for early candidate to Pipe Bomb of the Year, as Punk called out Laurinaitis for how it must've ate him alive with jealousy that while his brother was one of the legendary Road Warriors, he himself was so utterly terrible and/or bland/nondescript in the ring (which has some basis in reality, as he gets almost no credit for the RKO / Gringo Cutter / Diamond Cutter despite the fact that it was the Ace Crusher first) that he had to trade in his tights for a suit to get anywhere in the business, whereas the anti-authority rebel Punk is the WWE Champion and has accomplished more in the past year than Ace has his entire career. This and some prodding by [[Mick Foley]] to at least admit his true intentions led to a [[Villainous Breakdown]] which was oddly enough the most interesting Laurinaitis has ever been.
* [[Edge]] was quite adept at handing these out to various wrestlers throughout his career. But perhaps the most noticeable and famous was his promo to [[Matt Hardy]] after the latter's return after being fired due to the [[Lita]] scandal. After hearing Hardy's awful return promo in which he said he hoped Edge would die in a car accident, Edge responded the next week in a [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wfsRwbuvdwY six minute destruction] of Hardy as a person and a wrestler. Deriding Hardy for his lack of commitment to Lita and how he was only in his position because of riding Edge's coat tails, ended with Edge pleading Hardy to buckle up and be safe so he could have the pleasure of beating him at [[Summer Slam]].
** This promo was not totally appreciated back around the time that it happened for already-stated reasons, but over time it (as well as Edge and Lita themselves) would end up a case of [[Vindicated
* [[Ric Flair]] verbally [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7hunVTAbsUg destroys] Carlito's career in only two minutes.
* On the 5/14/12 edition of ''Raw'', [[John Cena]] was at it again, verbally tearing apart John Laurinaitis and his egotistical rule as [[Corrupt Corporate Executive|General Manager]] of both Raw & SmackDown.
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== Reality TV ==
* In the first season of ''[[Survivor (TV series)|Survivor]]'', fourth-place finisher Susan Hawk opts to use her time allotted to ask the final two ([[Magnificent Bastard|Richard Hatch]] and [[Plucky Girl|Kelly Wigglesworth]]) a question to instead deliver one to both but ''especially'' Kelly, who Sue had intended to take to the final two of the competition and instead both defected from their overall alliance but cast the deciding vote to get rid of Sue instead of Richard.
{{quote| "Kelly, the Rafting Persona Queen... you did get stomped on on national TV by a city boy who never swam, let alone been in the woods or jungle or rowed a boat in his life. You sucked on that game. Anyways, I was your friend at the beginning of this, really thinking that you were a true friend. I was willing to be sitting there and putting you next to me... at that time you were sweeter than me, I'm not a very... openly nice person. I'm just frank, forward, and tell you the way it is. To have you sit there next to me, and have me lose 900,000 dollars just to stomp on somebody like [Richard]. But as the game went along and the two tribes merged you lied to me, which showed me the true person that you are; you're very two-faced and manipulative to get where you're at anywhere in life, that's why you fail all the time. ... but Kelly, go back to a couple of times Jeff [Probst, the host] said 'what goes around comes around?' It's here. You will not get my vote, my vote will go to Richard, and I hope that is the one vote that makes you lose the money. If not, so be it, I'll shake your hand and go on from here. But if I were ever [to] pass you along in life again and you were laying there, dying of thirst, I would not give you a drink of water. I would let the vultures take you and do whatever they want with ya. With no ill-regrets. I plead to the jury tonight to think a little about the island that we have been on. This island is pretty much full of only two things; snakes and rats. And in the end of Mother Nature, we have Richard the snake, who knowingly went after prey, and Kelly who turned into the rat that ran around as the rats do on this island, trying to run from the snake. I feel it that we owe it to the island spirits that we have learned to come to know to let it be in the end as Mother Nature intended it to be, for the snake to eat the rat."}}
** Eighteen seasons later, twelfth-place finisher Erik Cardona uses his time allotted to deliver one that casts an [[Alternate Character Interpretation]] on the Final Three of ''Samoa'': [[Standardized Leader|Mick]], [[Entitled Bastard|Russell]], and [[Guile Heroine|Natalie]]:
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** In ''All-Stars'', ninth-placer Lex van den Berghe delivers one to finalists [[The Chessmaster|Rob]] and [[Shorttank|Amber]] that's littered with [[Moral Myopia]], since he's berating them for making very similar moves that he made prior to being voted out:
{{quote| "It's just a game. That's something we've probably all said a thousand times while we were out here. And I'm sure that for both of you, it was an excuse that helped wash away the guilt as you played the game the way that you played it. You know what? That phrase, 'it's just a game'? It's a big lie. It's not just a game. For all of us out here, for all of you, it's life. And the line between game and life is not cut and dried. Life blurs into the game constantly. This game exposes who we are as people to the core. It's like truth serum. And I think the way you play this game is representative of the kind of person you are. The hardest lesson I learned out here was about friendship and betrayal. And I think the true measure of a man is what kind of friend he is. What kind of a friend are you, Rob? What kind of a friend were you to me? You asked me to do you a favor. Bro to bro. Friend to friend. And I did the only thing I could do, and that was to answer the call of a friend in need. You repaid that by putting a knife in my back. As far as this game's concerned, I lost, and you both beat me. No sour grapes, no bitterness. With all sincerity, I congratulate both of you for making it to the final two. But as I see it, as good as your game was, you sold out your values, you sold out your character, and you sold out your friends for a stack of greenbacks. I hope it was worth it, because that money will never be enough to buy it all back." }}
* On the UK version of ''[[The Apprentice (TV series)|The Apprentice]]'':
** Katie Hopkins delivered a [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9uYqqeeqYzQ particularly memorable one] to Adam Hosker in Series 3.
{{quote| "I could not have put more effort into yesterday. I fragged myself to the bone yesterday to try and make this thing work. Your reasons for bringing me in here just do not stack up. One, on a personal level, and two, on a business level. Sir Alan said he does not know about my personal stuff. He knows about it because you talked about it, because Kristina talked about it. Fine, been that, but if you want to go personal, I'll go personal. I very much strongly advise you not to take down the personal route. At a business level, you have one speed setting, and that speed setting is slow, slow, slow! Someone put the wrong speed dial in when they created you, sweetie, which is why when the phone rings, I always drop. Because I know that phone call will take forever to hear something either I know, or I can get done quicker myself. So you know what? You're just barking up the wrong tree!"}}
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* One of the female leads in Neil LaBute's ''Reasons to Be Pretty''. Earlier, though the comment is never stated outright, it's implied that her boyfriend has said she was just "regular" in comparison to a female coworker who was "hot," and things quickly soured between them. She breaks up with her boyfriend and delivers one of these speeches to him in front of a crowded mall, commenting on how he stinks after work, his nostrils are unattractive, his penis is small, and they have unimaginative sex.
* In John Adams' opera ''The Death of Klinghoffer,'' the wheelchair-bound Leon Klinghoffer delivers one of these to the terrorists, about how he and his wife generally try to be good people while the terrorists are, well, terrorists.
* ''[[The Boys in
{{quote| '''Harold:''' Now it's my turn, and ready or not, Michael, here goes: you're a sad and pathetic man. You're a homosexual and you don't want to be, but there's nothing you can do to change it. Not all the prayers to your God, not all the analysis you can buy, in all the years you've go left to live. You may one day be able to know a heterosexual life - if you want it desperately enough, if you pursue it with the fervor with which you annihilate. But you'll always be homosexual as well. Always Michael. Always. Until the day you die.}}
* Done in ''[[Man of La Mancha]]'' by the Knight of the Mirrors (actually Carrasco in disguise), with attendants pushing mirrors into Don Quixote's face every way he turns:
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* Slowbeef gives one of these to Quadraxis14 in the SNES9X ''[[Retsupurae]]''. Here is the speech without the [[Verbal Tic]]:
{{quote| Shut up! There are no viewers. No one watched this to the end except me. It is a seriously horrible video, Quadraxis14. [[Scrub|There is no skill in]] [[Save Scumming|replaying the same thing over and reloading save states over and over again]]. A monkey could do this. A kid can do this. It doesn't matter. I don't know what the point of the video is. I don't know why you're doing it. It will not make you popular in school. It will not get you girls or anything. It's a waste of time. I'm sorry. I'm taking away from "On Liberty".}}
* ''[[
{{quote| Well, I think it's obvious whose fault [[The Ultimates|Ultimates 3]] is. You. Yes, you. The audience of this show. [[Reviews Are the Gospel|You sycophantic worms will buy anything dished out to you.]] They told you this garbage was gold and you believed it. Just like if I had said something was good or bad, you'll believe me instantly. So go on. Continue being the mindless, dreary-eyed, ugly bags of fat that I can call my fans.}}
* ''[[Doctor Horribles Sing Along Blog]]'' has [[Smug Super|Captain Hammer]] deliver one disguised as a [[Rousing Speech]] with the song "[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5yGeroywBuo&NR=1 Everyone's A Hero]". Pretty much everyone in the audience is fooled save for [[The Messiah|Penny]], who openly looks shocked at the context of the song.<ref> And said shock may or may not have been based off of one line: "Yeah, we totally had sex."</ref>
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If you’re a bunch of scary alcoholic bums! Everybody! }}
** Dr. Horrible delivers a subsequent one with "Slipping", calling Captain Hammer's audience out on their [[Dying Like Animals]] devotion to their hero.
* [[The Spoony Experiment
** He recently did another for the people who didn't like [[Mass Effect 3]]'s ending
* Inverted in an [[Over the Gun]] [[Let's Play]] of ''[[
{{quote| It's only ''me'' that could manage to do that! Oh, he's such a ''cock''! I- I want me key off you, mate, but... but I dunno how I'm gonna do it, though! It's okay me saying I want it back off ya, but you've got my number, haven't you? That's not good news. That's a goomba with a look on his face, as if to say "I am protected by these weird mechanics. I am gonna jump off your head. Not only that - I have got your key." He looks quite, quite serious... he doesn't look phased by the fact I'm stood underneath him; he's gonna stomp my face through. [[Crowning Moment of Funny|This is the first time in twenty one years of gaming that I have been bested by a goomba]].}}
* 4chan has [http://www.1337upload.net/files/Furfagsqg9.png this] to say to the furry community.
** A furry artist named Metal-Kitty made one for Furry Haters. [http://metal-kitty.deviantart.com/art/Furry-Analysis-2-100341852\]
* A video by a user named Armake21 made one of these for the [[Irate Gamer]], who got him kicked off youtube for it.
* In ''[[I'm a Marvel And
{{quote| '''The Joker:''' You ''don't know...'' (Begins to laugh hysterically)<br />
'''Darkseid:''' What? Another Earth joke?<br />
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** In the first season of "After Hours," Lex Luthor gave one to Superman in an attempt to recruit him in joining him in his plan to [[Ret-Gone]] the Marvel Universe:
{{quote| '''Lex Luthor:''' The Marvel Universe has corrupted everything you stand for all in the name of high drama. Think about it Kal-El. Your job is to be an inspiration for people, someone they can look up to, someone they can aspire to be like; in steadfastness, in character, in ideals. And what did Marvel offer? They said don’t worry; you don’t have to aspire to anyone in our books. You just have to relate to them. And now we have an entire culture that thinks that who they are is just fine and how dare anyone suggest they can improve themselves? Why aspire to be Superman when it’s so much easier to relate to Spider-Man? No one wants to look up to you anymore, Superman. They don’t want to strain their necks. Instead they look straight ahead at the compromised heroes in front of them and say "That’ll do just fine".}}
* Dr. Loomis gives one to Michael in the ''[[Halloween (
* A big one comes from ''Erika's Old Big Sister'', the sequel to ''[[Erikas New Perfume]]'', in which Marie gets the [[Fountain of Youth]] effects on her undone and proceeds to become the ultimate [[Big Brother Bully|Big Sister Bully]] while trying (and failing) to rebuild her teenage social status. The speech comes in the climax, when Marie tries to {{spoiler|undo Sarah's [[Plot-Relevant Age-Up]], causing Erika to [[Beware the Nice Ones|snap]] and lay into Marie that all her problems stem from her own jealousy and self-loathing, that her bratty nature better suits the lifestyle of a three-year-old than a 16-year-old, and that [[World of Cardboard Speech|she is now strong enough to]] [[Not Afraid of You Anymore|handle whatever Marie can dish out]]. Marie is hit ''hard'' by this and, realizing that Erika is right, requests to return to toddlerhood.}}
* In [[Kickassia]], [[
{{quote| "Stop being a douchebag! It's totally going to backfire!"<br />
"Are you willing to let down the people that got you here? Your friends? Your allies!"<br />
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{{quote| '''Arbiter:''' "...You've always been an utter moron, but there was a time when it was at least somewhat charming. You didn't know any better. It was innocent. But now it's like you're self-aware to some degree. Instead of shouting outrageous things in sheer ignoreance it's like you're genuinely out to antagonize and hurt people. It's not funny anymore...<br />
'''Master Chief:''' "wat, u think ur n e funs 2 lived w/? ...when ur not paraeding around h33r pretending 2 sound samrt ur sitting arond all :( drinking all teh bewze whining liek a little cunt about hao much dick ur lief sux..." }}
* The Webshow [[TV Trash]] features a series of episodes where Chris "Rowdy C" Moore watches three of the most controversial [[
{{quote| And so, after a full month of pointing out some of the worst "Family Guy" has churned out, what else is there to say? (shows a picture of [[
** For those who do not know, this speech is a parody of Quagmire telling off Brian in "Jerome is the New Black"
* On the [[American Idol]] forum [[Exactly What It Says
{{quote| I agree people have the right to express their opinions, but I have the exact same right. The irony is I actually like both Jessica and Hollie, I may have defended Hollie more lately because of my perception she's being kicked while she's down. I'm sure this is something you can now relate to after Thursday. Quite honestly I should see this as flattering because you and others must have much more faith in her making a come back than I do. I hope IDF represents only a really small percentage of the Idolverse's perceptions, because you're not doing yourself any favors, when Hollie finally does leave her votes are gonna go somewhere and perhaps not where you'd like. But somethings never change and you guys can do what you like and I'll respond when I feel the need}}
* Near the end of ''[[Red vs. Blue]]: Revelation'', Tex delivers a short one to Church after she {{spoiler|shoots him to betray their location to Washington and the Meta}}:
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