Archie Comics/Headscratchers: Difference between revisions

== [[Archie Comics]] ==

* Why don't both Betty and Veronica just tell that flip-flopping, two-timing, pseudo-cheating doofus to shove it?

** The only other guy in town worth a damn is Jughead, and he's more interested in hamburgers than romance. If he ever alters his policy on dames, they might have someone to dump Archie ''for''.

** Uh, both of the girls also date other guys on occasion. Betty less so, but Veronica dates Reggie at least as much as Archie dates Betty, and she's usually more callous about it, often deliberately and mean-spiritedly rubbing Archie's nose in whatever made her pick Reggie as a date over him. Betty's also done the same thing, with Reggie as well, just less often since it's generally agreed she's supposed to be the nice one. If Archie's a "flip-flopping, two-timing, pseudo-cheating doofus", then Betty and Veronica are "flip-flopping, two-timing, pseudo-cheating bimbos".

* I've never understood the whole Betty vs. Veronica debate to begin with. Okay, maybe the comic medium is obscuring the fact that Veronica is actually more beautiful, but then again, they've pointed out that Betty can sub for Ronnie in a pinch using just a wig. Aside from appearance, you have personality. Now, Archie's a good ol' boy who almost certainly is headed for eventual marriage and family. And if you take a good look at his choices, only one of the girls is going to make a loving wife and caring mother. Short of an act of God, Veronica couldn't possibly fulfill Archie's future needs, so why keep chasing her?

** Just to clarify the bad match: Veronica is always conscious of status, class, and money; Archie is never comfortable in any situation involving these qualities, and is always relieved to find a way out of the social engagements Veronica ropes him into. Barring some adolescent pranks, Archie is fairly bad at deception and manipulation, whereas Veronica is a consummate pro, frequently using her considerable resources to push Archie into a situation that suits her desires (sometimes in direct conflict with Archie's own desires). I could go on. Why would any man date a woman like that? This is what baffles me.

*** Well, let's not forget that Veronica is probably one of the most popular and damned hottest girl in the school... and Archie is lucky enough to have her come after him. He's still a guy, and even though Betty might be the better choice, he can't so easily ignore a hot piece of ass like Ronnie.

*** Veronica has class and style and a larger-than-life "starlette" quality to her like that of a young Jackie O or Lauren Bacall. Even Betty has admitted that Veronica leaves people in awe of her (the fact that Betty is NOT in awe of her is one of the things Veronica admires about Betty). Naturally, Archie is in awe of Veronica, but in his case, he even manages to get dates with her.

*** In some depictions (it was never known for consistency), Betty comes on very strong. This can be unsettling. Veronica appears relatively unobtainable, and looks more appealing for that reason.

**** As a former teenage boy, it's definitely the girl I got to date half a time then dropped I pined over for a year and her friend who would have gone out with me at the drop of a hat I hardly knew the existence of.

** Note that this isn't about who Archie ''should'' choose, but that the story is presented as if Archie actually has a choice. I've never seen anything that suggests Archie goes on more than a couple dates with Betty here and there. The rest of the time he uses her unrequited love to get free baked goods, help with his homework and free car repairs.

*** Maybe back in the 50s/60s, but more recently, Archie dates Betty just as often as he dates Veronica.

** There is a very rare dynamic in play in the Archie/Veronica/Betty relationship. It is so rare, that often, it goes unnoticed, as we try to morph it into a more familiar FMF gestalt. But, what is really playing out here is a typical "I'm in love with my best friend's girl" situation, only with the genders reversed. We're not accustomed to seeing a female in the "buddy with unrequited love" role, so most people morph it into "Archie is torn between two lovers"; this puts our focus back on the male, which is a cultural thing. Now, go back and reread these stories, but, in your mind, assume that the focus is on Betty as the "point" on the triangle, torn between loyalty to Veronica and her desire for Archie, and it will all become clear.

** Next week: I deconstruct the Moose/Midge/Reggie symbiosis, using Hegelian principles, and meaningful passages from Kierkkagard.

*** Just as long as you leave Jughead/Big Ethel/Dilton alone. Heidegger freaks me out.

* And how come Veronica never picked Reggie? Maybe because he usually goes after Midge and picks Mousse?

** Because Reggie is vain and self-centered enough to annoy ''her''. As goofy and poor as Archie is, there are times when it's apparent that Veronica appreciates his modesty and sincerity, which Reggie rarely displays.

* How long have they been in high school?

** Over fifty years. Next question.

*** She gets off on seeing her man beat the crap out of other guys, and he loves the testosterone rush of fighting for his girl, combine these two and you get one awesome sex life.

*** [[Fridge Brilliance|Warning bells for an abusive relationship if these two should ever become married or even live-in partners, much?]]

* Mr. Weatherbee is entirely too powerful, and too petty, for a school principal. Public high school principals don't have the power to expel students. How many times have I seen Archie stumble over his feet and cause a huge calamitous mess and get "expelled" for it? Too many to count.

** When has Mr. Weatherbee ever expelled Archie? He's sent him to detention more times than there's even hours in a high school curriculum, but not once have I ever seen him actually expel, or even threaten to expel Archie. The closest was once asking Archie to transfer to another school, and that was more of a joke.

** There was one comic where Mr. Weatherbee expelled Archie. Archie left the school wondering what he was going to tell his parents. After a little while, Mr. Weatherbee felt guilty and went to find Archie. He found him playing video games in an arcade, and he was so angry that he marched in there and told Archie to report back to school immediately. One of my favorites.

* Why is Archie not in jail!? He's broken HOW MUCH of Mr. Lodge's shit now? That SHIT IS PRICELESS!

** It's also probably heavily insured.

** The funny thing is that he isn't really clumsy. He once showed he was an excellent juggler, much to Ronnie and Lodge's surprise. [[Hilarity Ensues|Then he tripped on the way out...]]

* When does the series take place? Instead of keeping it in the 40s like most comics, it appears to be in the 21th century with no signs of a retcon.

** That's what happens when you combine [[Long Runners]], [[Negative Continuity]], and throw in the occasional Wacky Adventure. The series doesn't have much of a real timeline, ya just gotta take it like it is.

* Why is there a contest? Archie obviously prefers Veronica. Granted it's for the wrong reasons, but ''still''! He almost always picks her over Betty, gladly does anything she says, and is more than happy to blow of Betty for Veronica. Why doesn't he just go out with Veronica? I mean, I know he likes Betty, too, but he likes Veronica ''more''.

* Why does Kevin have [[Blue Eyes]]? It's jarring when everyone else has colorless, black eyes.

** Clearly [[The Pendragon Adventure|Riverdale is the eleventh territory, and Kevin is Saint Dane.]]

* Why doesn't Archie just talk it out with the two ladies, and [[Marry Them All|go out with them]] ''[[Marry Them All|both]]''? They're both interested in him, he's interested in them both, why not? ...''Besides'' the obvious "defiant of societal norms"... or "being stupid".

** Because Archie knows he's on to a good thing. He fears if he actually had the conversation with them, they'd make him choose and he'd loose one of them. Whereas if things stay as they are, he's got it made.

 

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[[Category:Archie Comics]]

[[Category:Headscratchers]]

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