Badass Boast/Web Comics: Difference between revisions

** [[Big Bad|Xykon]] has a nice habit of combining this with [[Hannibal Lecture]] and [[No Holds Barred Beatdown]].

{{quote| '''Xykon to Dorukan in [[Start of Darkness]]:''' Hey, you know what really gets under my skin? Proverbially, of course? [[Screw You Elves|A century of wizards looking down their damn noses at me]]. Energy Drain! I know people think I'm stupid. Because I'm not a wizard. [[Obfuscating Stupidity|Because I get bored easily.]] [[Brilliant but Lazy|Because I have no interest in strategy or tactics or contingency planning]]. Energy Drain! But see, I've learned a lot over the years since I died. A lot more than I learned during my life. And now I see that planning doesn't matter. Strategy doesn't matter. Only two things matter: Force in as great a concentration as you can manage, and style. And in a pinch, style can slide. Energy Drain! In any battle, there's always a level of force against which no tactics can succeed. For example, all I need to do is keep smacking you with Energy Drains, and soon you won't be able to cast any of your fancy spells at all. Energy Drain! [[Un Equal Rites|Because yes, I am a sorceror - and this magic is in my bones, not cribbed off of "Magic for Dummies."]] [[No Holds Barred Beatdown|And I can keep casting the same friggin' spell at you until you roll over and die.]] [[When All You Have Is a Hammer|You can have your finely-crafted watch - give me the sledgehammer to the face any day]]. ENERGY DRAIN!<br />

'''Xykon to (an invisible) Vaarsuvius:''' You seem to have an interest in power, so let me educate you a little while I search for you. It's sort of this thing I like to do sometimes, especially for learned wizards such as yourself. Power, it isn't something that you put on or take off like a jacket. It's something you just ARE. If you can lose it by blowing two Will saves, you never really had any power in the first place, see what I'm saying? Hell, the idiot paladin understands better than you do, 'cause he got every one of those hit points I burned off of him the hard way: he earned them. 'Course now he's also earned an upgrade to Prisoner First Class for daring to touch my pretty little bauble. It's sort of the same as how we've already been treating him, only now we get serious about it. Anyhoo, where was I? Oh, right. Your soul shenanigans are real flashy, but they had one weakness: they were shackled to your lame mid-level ass! I used to think spells equaled power, too, back when I was alive. I've learned a lot since then. You know what does equal power? Power. Power equals power. Crazy, huh? But the type of power? Doesn't matter as much as you'd think. It turns out, everything is oddly balanced. Weird, but true. For example: ...Right now, power takes the form of a +8 racial bonus to Listen skill checks. ''[He grabs V by the throat]'' So, Uncle Xykon, what's the moral of the story? A big pile of spells isn't enough when the other guy has a big pile of spells AND the strength to crush your windpipe with his bare phalanges. And they died happily ever after. The End. }}

** also, Lien:

{{quote| My parents were fishermen. When I was a little girl, I stood right here and learned how to clean the fish that they caught. I'm telling you this so that you know that when I say that if you take one more step, I will gut you like the catch of the day — IT IS NOT HYPERBOLE!}}

** Malack knows [http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0811.html the value of brevity.]

'''Nale:''' Unnnh...I'm still...alive.<br />

'''Malack:''' I'm not finished. [[Cherry Tapping|Quickened Inflict Moderate Wounds.]] }}

** His dad gets a minor one [http://www.girlgeniusonline.com/comic.php?date=20030418 here.] "I will go by myself. Let the people see that I ''can''"

** Tarvek got [http://www.girlgeniusonline.com/comic.php?date=20110117 one] similar to Gil's "in control" rant recently

{{quote| "'Wizard'? Are you kidding me? '''Wizards''' do parlor tricks. '''I''' throttle the heavens!"<br />

** Not to mention:

{{quote| '''Black Mage:''' Can we have a minute?<br />

* From ''[[How I Killed Your Master]]'':

{{quote| '''Ji Jiao:''' Everyone knows you haven't fought in ten years.<br />

** Also, Fei quoting Liu Feng:

{{quote| "I don't know what it's like to hit a man twice."}}

* Sidney Burns delivers one that is essentially his declaration of war in [[Mob Ties]]. While simple, when combined with the actions he is performing, it helps to establish his position as {{spoiler|the number one badass in the [[Mob Ties]] universe.}}

** And another, which basically states what Sid's ultimate goal is from that moment in the comic onward:

{{quote| {{spoiler|For Mika, I will KILL A GOD.}}}}