Buffy the Vampire Slayer/Headscratchers/General: Difference between revisions

*** Because she's a lesbian, not bisexual. Plenty of gay and lesbian people have been in relationships with people of the opposite sex before realising their true orientation, especially early in their life. Willow is a lesbian. End of story

*** Willow is not a lesbian, she is bisexual. In fact, she is one of the most prominent and popular bisexual characters seen on any TV show. As a character - and as others have noted - Willow is deeply insecure in herself, from "Welcome to the Hellmouth" through to "Chosen", constantly adopting new labels and identities: geek, Jewish, scooby, slayerette, Wiccan, lesbian - all are attempts by her to define herself, rather than herself doing the defining. With her insecurity, she desires others to accept her, she uses these various labels to do so and often brings it up an attempt to placate others; note, the only real times she actively defines herself as lesbian are when she's trying to reason with others: her fight with Buffy and Xander in season 4, her fight with Tara in season 5, her argument with Anya in season 6. And she didn't just 'experiment' with guys, she was actively in love with Xander for several years, from before the show started until late season 3. She was also deeply in love with Oz and in his last appearance in season 4 even stated that she always would be.

** This is a textbook example of [[No Bisexuals]]. My theory is that the writers are afraid of [[Viewers are Morons|accidentally implying that Willow's lesbianism was just a phase]] if they have her start dating men again.

** Willow also seemed insecure about identifying as a lesbian. Remember when she flipped at Tara, sarcastically apologizing for not having as much "lesbian cred" or something like that? (I think this was in season 5, but I'm not sure.) Willow seemed to identify as lesbian because the women she was involved with needed the assurance that she wouldn't leave them for a guy - bisexuals get that a LOT, as stupid as it sounds. So it was an image thing for her.

** The fact that she didn't go for guys after Tara's death doesn't necessarily mean anything. Perhaps Willow got in her head exactly what the writers were afraid of: that if she were with a man after Tara's death, it would look disrespectful or as if she were admitting her lesbian attractions were only a phase. Perhaps she was bisexual and in denial about the fact. She wouldn't be the first bisexual girl to convince herself she was a lesbian by far. Sometimes there has to be a whole new realization/coming out process because of it.

** Willow has a thing about labels. It's part of her insecurity; she grabs a label that only slightly applies to her, and then hangs onto it for dear life and will defend it to the death. She does this with "lesbian", she does this with "Wiccan", hell, even Dark Willow does this when she says, "Now I'm the Slayer." It's the teen insecurities that, as we see in Restless, she never actually got over; she just buried it under a mountain of labels saying "Hey, look at me, I'm in the Lesbian Crowd now, isn't that cool?"

 

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